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[–][deleted] 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]loofyd 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah ABUNDANCE
[–]scjw 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Normalize being clear and direct with your intentions and playful with your approach.
[–]mamasboy37 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ask them out for coffee or drinks?
[–]Papi_Lazlo 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I'm guessing by your description that you have no trouble talking to strangers. The next point I'd look towards is if the conversation is interesting and engaging to the people you talk to.
Are they giving you eye contact? Does their tone go up and down during the conversation? Do they talk about their passions and so excited they can't hide it? Are they relating their words to something you've said? Are you both smiling or laughing? Do they show signs of interest?
If yes to most of these then you're a part of an interesting conversation. If they're showing signs of disinterest like turning their body away or looking at their phone, then it's time to switch up the vibe or exit yourself from the conversation.
Now the second part could be that these girls aren't feeling sexual attracted to you. Physical looks and expressions of confidence are attractive so groom yourself well, dress nicely but not too formally and wear deodorant. On the emotional side of attraction are you flirting with them? By teasing them, making them want to validate themselves to you. Or through complimenting them on their traits or specific things about their looks, feeling validated by you. Are you showing that you're compatible by talking about mutual interests and sharing your own stories relating to them?
If they're joking with you go along with their joke and build on-top of that. Make a call back to an old joke later and make her laugh whenever you get the chance.
Just be sure to balance these techniques 50/50 with small talk, open ended questions, and you'll go a long way.
Use light kino to show you're not afraid of getting close to her.
Ask for her number or contact details and set up the date on the spot. If you get rejected that's fine go try with another girl you like.
[–]mamasboy37 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This is what I was looking for. Conversations? I can keep them alive and interesting for as long as I want (I have worked in sales for 2+years)
Physical appealing? I'm 170cm so usually, I go and try flirting with shorter girls.
Non-sexual touches? this is where I get most awkward.
Also, what is 'light kino'?
[–]Papi_Lazlo 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Great you're all set on those bases plus you know what you like in a girl. Already you're displaying confidence and leadership. What I believe you need to do more of is sexually escalate the interaction.
Non sexual touches are as simple as touching her elbow for a short moment when you're sharing a story or laughing. Resting your hand on her shoulder for a couple seconds when making a serious point. Before touching make sure you two are reasonably close to each other, you don't want to have to stretch your arm out to touch her. You'll tell if she's receptive to your touch if she's smiling and leaning into you, or even better, touching you in any way. These are all IOI's and a sign that she's comfortable with you touching her. If she pulls away, pushes your hand or gives you a weird look then she doesn't want to be touched at that moment. These are IOD's. Don't touch her for a few minutes, only if she didn't explicitly say she didn't want to be touched, then try giving another light touch. If she pulls away from you again then don't give her any more contact.
All of this touch is for her to get comfortable with your bodies being close together as you're entering her personal space and she's in yours. Most people don't like it when strangers are up in their bubble so work on making her feel comfortable. If she's good with the touch then you can leave your hand for a second longer and even try touching more intimate areas like her hands, back, hips etc as you can tell she's comfortable being with you. This will lead up to the kiss but hold on a second Buster.
Reserve the more intimate touches for when you're in a more private place with Hera, you don't want to get frisky in front of all of her friends and she doesn't want to be perceived as easy. Conversation has been going well for a few minutes so ask her to move over a couple metres to a new spot. If she complies continue the conversation then ask her to come with you to another location, be it the room next door, outside or a cafe across the road. This will give the sense that you two have known each other for longer since you both have memories of being in different places together. Isolating her away from where you met allows you to get to know each other with less distractions.
Flirting you should already be accustomed with. Mix little teases with compliments and give her a rollercoaster of emotions to remember you by.
Phase-shifting is when you're shifting the tone of the conversation to a much lower and slower pace, creating the feeling of intimacy and privacy. You'll speak soft and slow and she'll follow suit. Eye contact is important in this stage as you'll both feel as though the whole world contains just you two. You should be fairly close to each other, well within each other's personal bubble. When she stops talking hold deep eye contact for a few seconds and hold a little smile. If she reciprocates by looking into your eyes or looking at your lips for 3 seconds then go in for the kiss. If she doesn't give you any signals of interest in that moment of silence then just continue the conversation and later ask for her number and set up a date. The kiss can wait. You could also wait for her to stop talking then tell her you could kiss her right now, any affirmative or maybes then go for it. If eww no then say you were just kidding and said you could, not would.
You don't have to go for the kiss when phase shifting but it's a great way to get her in the mood to. Small talk is super important so try 60/40 small talk vs flirting techniques. Getting her number and setting up the date far outweighs getting a kiss and not seeing her again so see how you go in the moment.
Kino, flirting, isolating and phase shifting will sexually escalate the interaction and with signs of IOI's go in for the kiss. With IOD's take a step back and try again later. Don't be afraid to leave an interaction and interact with someone or something else. Know your a high value guy and act like one. She'll either ignore you or find a way to get your attention back. Take little steps to implement these when talking with a girl you're attracted to, not forgetting to use humour and small talk in between.
[–]mamasboy37 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You are not alone.
[–]A-constant-beat 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Honestly, just be patient.. you’ll get it... the right women will come around. You seem to be playing the field. Now, just keep doing what your doing and eventually one will catch
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[–][deleted] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]loofyd 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]scjw 3 points4 points5 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]mamasboy37 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Papi_Lazlo 4 points5 points6 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]mamasboy37 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Papi_Lazlo 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]mamasboy37 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]A-constant-beat 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link