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[–]WIA20XX 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The pic you have up says "Resting Bitch Face". The baggy streetwear doesn't help. Pick one.
But you are certainly cute enough. You were my type 8 years ago, but we dated, and it was horrible for both of us. I hated your cat.
Just go little more sexy (lip gloss might be enough) and go to the events where guys that are your type are going.
If you're trying to do the online thing, it's all photos. Find a rocker girl that looks like you, and copy those photos.
You would probably clean up at Pratt or in any of those Afropunk circles. Your whole look screams Village.
Have you been going to House of Yes or wherever the cool kids are going nowadays?
The only issue I can see you having is if you're trying to do the whole emo/goth/punk thing - a lot of those guys in the scene are not aggressive.
Good luck.
[–]MrNiceBrone 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Well, in my opinion, I think you should continue to just be yourself and be around people who appreciate who that is. That is the only way to truly feel valued and fulfilled. If, however, you don't like who that is, work on it. Do little things like working out or meditating. When you feel good about yourself it's so much easier to be yourself. Other people can tell, even on a subconscious level, and it make big difference.
[–]PuroPincheGains 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
So you're making a mistake that guys typically make in that you have large expectations of instant rewards without an idea of the work that goes into it. Everyone wants to cuddle up on a Saturday night by the fire with a bottle of wine, their cute puppy, and their dream girl/guy. But that takes time and effort. You don't just convey, "hey I like you," and then it's snuggle time. That's why people think you need to chill. You're going from 0 to 100 in one jump, when in reality, you're supposed to go up in increments of 5 or 10.
That brings us to mistake number two that people, especially guys, tend to make. Putting strangers on a pedestal. If you've never even been on a date with someone, you may like the idea of them that you've created in your head, but you don't know if you like them or not. Snuggle time with them might suck for all you know. Don't assume everyone is worthy of going from 0 to 100 just because you have a crush. Get to know them a bit.
All of that leads me here; dating is a slow process. Once you realize that and understand the normal romance outline in our society, you can actually start to pursue it. Here's some tips:
You don't tell people you like them. You think you like them. You're attracted to them. But you don't know much about them. You want to, but you don't currently, so you don't say it. Plus, we live in a society that likes to beat around the bush and have some plausible deniability. So what do you do instead? You ask people out. "Oh hey you like scary movies? We should totally go see that movie that just came out some time. Let me get your number and we can set something up!" Everyone knows what that means. Everyone knows it's a date. But they have plausible deniability. There's no pressure to commit, they can just go and get to know you before any sort of relationship stuff ever comes up.
There is no "the right one." There are plenty of "the ones" in this world. Half the population is guys. Only a few million live in your area probably. About 1/3 of them are an appropriate age for you. About 1/3 of those are decently attractive to you. Maybe 1/3 of them find you attractive. Maybe 10% of those guys have personality traits and habits that make them extra compatible for you. There's several people that can fill that role, but they are limited, and they will not just fall into your lap. If you want one, you have to go get one. You have to approach people. You don't need to approach to find someone. Most people in our society do not approach, ever. Most people in our society find love. They settle for the first semi attractive person that shows interest in them, and that's that. But also, most people see someone walk by every once in awhile and think, "wow, if only I had something charming to say." If you don't want to be that person living with what ifs, you'll have to approach guys. You have an advantage here. Guys get approached way less than women. Most of them will appreciate it. All you do is say, "hi, I'm Crazy Loner Bitch," and go from there. Simple enough. Maybe not easy, but simple.
Okay, so you can approach and ask people on dates. Cool. Now what? Well, you need one date to turn into many dates. At this point, I'd back off a bit. Let the guy take the lead. You can easily put in the effort and score more dates, but you want to sort out the guys who wouldn't have reached out to you if it was up to them to put in the effort. This is how you narrow down to that 10%. You should hold off on sex for a few dates. Many guys will have sex with women that they do not consider long-term relationship material. If it takes 1-2 dates to have sex, some guys will gladly stick around just for the sex. Much fewer guys will go on 3+ dates with someone they don't particularly find intriguing just for the non existent sex. Seriously, hold out for bit.
If after more than a few dates, and maybe a couple of months, you find that you are both mentally and physically compatible, you ask if they would like to be exclusive. They'll say yes or no. If they say yes, congrats, you got a boyfriend. As a guy, I personally tend to wait until the woman asks me so that I know how invested she is. It can be a game killer for guys to show too much investment for a variety of reasons. For you I don't think it matters as much who asks first. Just know that it isn't official until there's been a conversation about it and you both agree to it.
That's just a brief framework of modern romance from someone who has put these seduction principles into practice. Other than that, you should ask any specific questions you may have.
[–]thering_2002 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
can i get a tl;dr? lmao i can’t read all of this stuff right now knowing it all ramps up to the fact that i’m basically karen from mean girls with the emotionality of gretchen wieners
[–]megaman10x 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
bro just calm down. you can like people and be a big gay but don't so vocal so fast. just enjoy your time with them and gradually get to know them
[–]thering_2002 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
okay :) i can work on that next time. maybe when im in a better balanced place :) ...
I didn’t even have the hugest crush on the guys I was into at the time... I just ramped it up to myself and my friends too much for ... i guess a conflict to have at the moment? lol i’m getting into yoga and other extracurricular’s i can maintain at a decent enough pace... i don’t know if i’m ready to start dating now ... it’s weird and I know i’m only 21 but yet, i kinda wanna start savoring the time I have before I have to grow up
just my current thoughts for the night as I’m reading this response
[–]megaman10x 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
well don't try to have conflict in the moment or rush into shit because you think your life is boring or something like that. you should know when you're ready (or when you have to leave your comfort zone) remember to masturbate before you make a romantic decision :)
[–]thering_2002 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
omgg saving ur comment this makes so much sense to me!!!!!!! i was writing about this today and i wrote in the margins of my class readings that i’ll know when the moment comes.
question: what do if life is actually boring and i just now realize????? i’ve been doing coke to pass the time lolol this stress of a comedown helps but im like not at all the kind of person to follow through on things halp
might start horror video gaming (did a thesis project on this) but also super brokey
[–]megaman10x 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I know it's a meme phrase but life is truly what you make it (aside from you know all of the horrors of the world that you have no control over) so you gotta just learn to accept it why are you doing coke to pass the time everytime i ask someone who's done coke if i should try it they say no lmao you mean like playing horror video games? you could always pirate lol
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Professional Russian Roulette Player here,
You sound intense, If some crazy chick approached me like "Woah, no shit? Like fucking Deer Hunter?" and I'm like "Fuck yeah, I mean we all know Dennis Hopper isn't dead, he's a reptilian those fuckers live forever, Didn't you watch Land of The Lost when you were a kid?" and then you just like wayyyy overbite your lower lip and start to drool a little, so I go all Don Juan on your ass and be like "You DTF?" So you all nerves right and just kinda nod and squeal, but you get to jiggling so hard the button on them Levi's pop-off and dot me right in the eye. I mean yeah we ended up in ER but you hated dem' jeans anyway and I'm sexy AF with an eye patch right?
So yeah I'd be totally down for that any given Sunday. Pm me with them digits.
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[–]WIA20XX 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]MrNiceBrone 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]PuroPincheGains 0 points1 point2 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]thering_2002 0 points1 point2 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]megaman10x 0 points1 point2 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]thering_2002 0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]megaman10x 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]thering_2002 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]megaman10x 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link