~ archived since 2018 ~

Direct approach

lobsterzbeatingmeat · 2019-03-02T20:32:31+00:00

Is a direct approach good for example being open and direct that i wanna sleep with them?...

lobsterzbeatingmeat

March 2, 2019

1 upvotes

/r/seduction

Download the post

Want to save the post for offline use on your device? Choose one of the download options below:

PDF TXT EPUB

Support the archive

Everything here was supposed to disappear. Banned subreddits, deleted communities, cancelled blogs — much of what is archived here survives nowhere else.

It stays free — no paywall, no account — for the next man who comes looking, the way it was free for you.

I pay for the servers, the storage and the bandwidth myself. If you want this record still standing in ten years, become one of the people who keeps it online.

Support the archive

Post Information

Title	Direct approach
Author	lobsterzbeatingmeat
Upvotes	1
Comments	3
Date	March 2, 2019 8:32 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/awlzxb/direct_approach/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/direct-approach.1463539 https://theredarchive.com/post/1463539

Comments

[–]IntoxicatedOrange 0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link

It depends, most of the time there's no benefit to direct openers, unless you are a beginner and have a hard time showing intent after the interaction has started, then it will get you kick started with that. But consider the payoff matrix where one axis is your opener and the other axis is her initial attraction:

Direct and she's already into you: You win

Drect and she's not into you: Rejection

Indirect and she's already into you: You win (as long as you can show intent later)

Indirect and she's not into you: Here you have a slightly higher chance of making her feel attracted before you show intent (that's when you'll get rejected if its going to happen)

So as you can see, the outcome of indirect is win/maybe-win while the outcome of direct is win/lose.

So there's very little reason to go direct unless you can't do the aforementioned caveat about intent, or you just want to make things go faster and you're certain she gave you IOIs before approaching.

[–][deleted] 7 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]IntoxicatedOrange 1 point2 points3 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Honestly, I'm about where you are too. If you're actually anxious/nervous to show your intent and that's why you fail to flirt/be sexual, then yeah maybe do some direct approaches for a few weeks just to get used to it, but then go back to indirect.

The ideal thing to do tho is open indirect but then start flirting by dropping sexual innuendos, teasing, starting to touch her after you get to know a few things about her. Like if there's a scale from 0 to 10 of how direct you are, its good to start at 0 or 1 on the opener but always being bumping it up to more you get to know the girl.

Easier said than done though, this is my sticking point right now too, I often go too direct too early, or too friendly/platonic and let that go on for too long. Practicing opening friendly and move into flirting within the first few minutes.

Watch some of Todd V's videos on "premise vs intent" by the way, I learned a lot about my own behavior from those!