Does anyone else get bad responses when being stereotypically friendly?

PrinceofSpades · 2012-08-20T11:21:27+00:00

Note how old you are and where you are/ who you are with. Also, if you are 100% confident (and I mean you don't EVER second guess what you do afterwards) in what you are doing, it doesn't really matter if you are really friendly with everyone or super suppish, as long as its your thing. If being friendly with people and having real conversations is your thing, and it isn't working with your social group, go out and meet new people, cut and dry (you should technically always be going out and meeting new people anyways).

cyniko · 2012-08-20T17:47:42+00:00

Yeah dude here, I don't like stereotypically friendly. It can feel fake, and overbearing. I'm not saying you are fake, I'm just speaking from my perspective. If I meet a dude who talks too much when I first meet him, especially if it's asking tons of GENERIC questions about me, it's usually not fun.

JTown91 · 2012-08-20T16:31:02+00:00

Why are you being so friendly? Do you genuinely have an intrest in these people or are you working on being friendlier for yourself? Either way, I'm going to take a stab at your problem. If you're practicing being frinedly for whatever reason (smiling/joking/asking questions) you should put away feelings about whether or not your going to be accepted by them and just show a genuine intrest in the person. It helps to think about them as just a human being and to remind yourself that while there may be surface diffrences between you and someone else, all people have essentially the same basic desires/fears/weaknesses/goals in life.

Try and be empathetic and actually get an idea of how the person you are conversing with is feeling - something a friend would do. For more serious conversations, try to pretend as if knowing how they are is important to you (if its not already). Looking people in the eyes is very important for this, and to gague how they're doing, because focusing on their eyes shows them you are not bored or busy thinking about something else (This works!). I would also suggest mimicing the speakers facial expression because this enables your face to give cues to your brain about how the conversation will progress, dont worry the person you're talking with won't find it weird.

Most guys will probably have a 'yo whatup' additude, so theres no reason to take it to super intense friend mode unless theres something specific you need to address, or if you need extra practice. Hope this helps let me know.

bluehat9 · 2012-08-20T14:39:20+00:00

Ya, people aren't attracted to friendly, nice, available. Think back to when you were in elementary school, or maybe middle school. Did you want to be friends with the kid who was super nice to everyone or the kid who had a little more of an edge or some mystery?

putridshitstain · 2012-08-21T04:35:08+00:00

I try not to act like the first part of what you said. The second part is definitely a lot easier to do and get better reactions with I think.

Title	Does anyone else get bad responses when being stereotypically friendly?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	9
Comments	5
Date	August 20, 2012 10:27 AM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/yimkq/does_anyone_else_get_bad_responses_when_being/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/does-anyone-else-get-bad-responses-when-being.1337635 https://theredarchive.com/post/1337635

Comments