Escalation

Methaxetamine · 2017-07-13T05:52:13+00:00

Ask her to go to you." Come here"

recyclablebanthas · 2017-07-13T07:38:52+00:00

__1__

Now I've tried keeping conversation but this is something that definitely needs work there's constantly this silence and us looking at our phones.

Well, conversations are going to have lulls. If you are uncomfortable with that, it will only feel worse.

However, if it happens a lot, then one of you isn't listening to the other and using the information to come up with something else to say. People sometimes think that conversations are about two people just magically saying all this stuff. But no. This is pretty much what happens.

Person #1 says something. They ask a question or make a statement. Maybe both.
Person #2 responds.
Person #1 listens to #2. They aren't thinking about what to say next; they are only dedicating their brain power to taking everything in.
Person #2 stops talking.
Person #1 thinks for a second about what was said. Then they reply based on what was JUST said. Easy topics to go deeper with include: motivations (why someone did something) and emotions (how someone felt about something).

__2__

I've touched her in social settings saying things like "you play sports? Getting buff I see." And proceeding squeeze her biceps. I've been doing things like that.

You've given no context for this, but off-hand, this sounds like you walking up, declaring a compliment, and then invading her space in a pretty personal way, with no indication for whether she was receptive to you before you did so.

Basic escalation starts off with smaller things first. Testing her space bubble. Touches around the forearm and shoulder. Etc.

__3__

She invited me over to do some homework together, we don't have the same class but I guess it's nice having others around.

Sounds good. So even if there is some awkwardness (it's unclear because you're leaving too much out), she's still inviting you over, alone.

__4__

I let her finish her homework before hopping in her bed.

Let her? She invited you over to do homework. Are you even doing your own homework? If not, and you're just paying lip service to the homework part and sitting around awkwardly while she actually does work, then you're going to come off a little desperate.

__5__

Now here I know I have to do something to escalate but what? Maybe it's just me but I feel it would've been awkward if I tried to escalate from there.....

The problem is that you're not demonstrating a progression of escalation anywhere here. You're just trying to rush through moves. Rushing to touch her, with only a compliment about her being buff, as some excuse for invading her space. Hopping onto her bed? (Hopping?)

Overall, the main issue is the same issue you have with conversation: You're not listening/paying attention. You're apparently more concerned with doing the "right" thing, than paying attention to her so she can show you what that would be.

There is no magic thing to do. There is no one "right" thing to do. If you wanted to escalate after she finished her homework, then you might have sat next to her to talk. Then observe how she reacted to you sitting next to her. Did she keep the same space or adjust so that she still had her space bubble?

And so on.

recyclablebanthas · 2017-07-13T07:39:22+00:00

This belongs in /r/askseddit as it is asking advice for a specific situation / girl

This will stay in spam filter, please repost in the AskSeddit subreddit.(Not askREDDIT, but askSEDDIT)

Please read RULES & GUIDELINES. This post is answered by many SIDEBAR guides.

I would also recommend reading 10-20 of the top posts on Seddit: FOUND HERE

Also, don't worry about it! You didn't do anything wrong since you didn't know

Title	Escalation
Author	BioPneub
Upvotes	2
Comments	3
Date	July 13, 2017 4:50 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/6mzh0k/escalation/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/escalation.1430359 https://theredarchive.com/post/1430359

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