External Game

Atrocitty · 2019-08-12T20:16:51+00:00

Been in your exact same situation. It’s not that you changed and people don’t like you anymore, it’s all in your head. Your state of mind determines how you see things. Clearly you were confident when things were going well with that one girl, and when you had that confidence everything else seemed good and you enjoyed yourself. Chances are, when things blew up with her, your confidence took a hit and it felt like the whole world was closing in on you, or that things weren’t going so well anymore.

Tldr it’s your state of mind that changed, not other people’s perspective on you and your attitude.

smoothmax · 2019-08-12T21:42:21+00:00

Sounds like you may be blind to everyone around you except this one crush.

Try to be nice, fun, a good listener, a social leader, a well dressed and cool guy ... get this ... just with your family first.

Then with your oldest and best friends. Then with co workers or school mates, and with people working in stores and stuff.

When you're a cool and attractive guy, you'll like yourself. Other people will like you. You will notice a ton of other people you're attracted to. The last thing you would ever do is obsess over one person cause you'll see the world as a smorgasbord that is wide open to fun, cool people.

MattGM97 · 2019-08-12T21:36:47+00:00

Duuuude, my situation is exactly the same as yours, word by word! I was just going to ask the same thing here before seeing your post.

One problem that we both seem to have is that external factors, a lot of the times outside our zone of influence, seem to determine our confidence level. Confidence needs to come from within us (easier said than done though).

A scarcity mindset seems to influence a lot too, we care too much about this one girl simply because we don't have a lot of girls in our lives. The solution is to change our lives and be more social. Go out more, cold approach, travel with friends/ alone and work on our inner game.

If you don't mind me asking, what exactly happened with you and the girl? In my case she just suddenly lost interest without reason (trusted sources said that apparently that happens to her with most guys).

I'm going to work on myself and then in 2 or 4 months try to get her interested again, but I'm not keeping any expectations. In the meantime, I try to keep a mostly friendly and teasing vibe with her at work.

Title	External Game
Author	alwayslearninggame
Upvotes	8
Comments	4
Date	August 12, 2019 7:54 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/cphm9y/external_game/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/external-game.1475923 https://theredarchive.com/post/1475923

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