Quick bit o' history first! Was in an open, long distance relationship for the last few years. Used OKC to meet other partners (ethically so). That relationship ended, but had other partners to help me through it. Changed profile to reflect that I'm newly "single", but not looking for anything... and ignored it. I'm happy enough for the moment with my casual friends, and might be emigrating soon.

But then, in an odd twist, I got a message from a very attractive young north american girl (I'm from UK/IE) with a high match %. Also recently single and looking to meet new people. Took a while to meet up with scheduling... anyway eventually did this evening.

It's been a WHILE since my last first date and she is so hot I'll admit I was feeling a bit nervous! Made a cheat sheet on my phone "assume attraction, tease, playful, have fun, lean back confident posture, kino, push pull, abundance mentality," etc.

Now I'll be honest, k-close was the most that was happening, she had told me of a halloween party she had to go to afterwards.

Rule breaking? I broke some... I led the discussion to politics, abortion, porn (that actually wasn't bad)... and all sorts of other "don't go there" topics. But it was good, I think it showed I had a bit of spine, while not getting carried away and bringing it back down to earth if it went on a bit too much. This girl was fun... and totally into a bit of "let's stir the pot". One rule I didn't break though, she began talking about her ex and immediately (cos usually this is like catnip to me, as in I love hearin that shit) I had PUA alarm bells ringing, and changed the subject quickfast! We hadn't even kissed yet... there's no way I'm ingratiating myself as therapist, the most unsexual of roles.

Not satisfied with our positioning in the bar we were at (couldn't kino) I suggested a gay bar... Got there and told her it was her round. My mojo was back and I was cheeky as anything. Sat in close beside her once she got the drinks... finally able to lightly touch her shoulder/elbow to emphasise speech/reaction. Then at one point I decided she was into it; while she told a story I started brushing my hand back and forth on her upper back. Positive reaction. So then, with hand on her thighs I guide her to sit between my legs cos I'm gonna give her the most awesome massage (I'm actually pretty OK at this). While at it, my face is right up to her neck and I'm just smelling (building up tension)... eventually I give her the lightest of kisses on the neck and tell her to get up and sit down while I go off to the toilet.

God it's fun to power play like that. Came back and she bites her lip... so sat in close, started talking about politics again... and when she begins her reply I put my hand behind her neck and guide her in for the kiss.

We made out on and off, sometimes started by her even, but always ended by me. My hands were like animals on a leash... going (mostly) to only OK areas... teasing... almost going too far but then pulling them away and growling in her ear. Girl was like putty at this stage, moaning whenever I growled, throwing compliments my way. At one point I assertively moved her head to the side and kissed her neck and she said "that's not fair". "What's not fair?" I asked... "You. Doing that. I have to go to a party and now I'm all hot and bothered". "Just don't slip off your seat when you get there." Cheekiest reply I've ever given, but in the moment I knew it would be well recieved, I was essentially impervious, so might as well make the most of it. Got a laugh and a little slap on the arm. "You're bad, you're making me not want to go to my party..." "You should go to the party." Teasing her, and showing a bit of control (also I had to get my bus).

Second big rule I broke, worth it I reckon. She was such a good sport, I decided to give away a bit of the game. Mid kiss, before we parted I said in a breathy voice "I'm not going to text you for a few days." "Why?" she asks. "That's just what I do. Except I'm telling you about it." "Okay" she says with a grin and a look of unspoken understanding.

And I won't text her for a few days...