I'd been having trouble getting out of the house and sarging since I got back into the game a couple weeks ago, so I decided I needed a jumpstart. On a whim, I bought a ticket to LA and threw myself in to day gaming head first with a trip across town to Universal Studios. I talked to everyone I passed in my hotel, at breakfast, on the walk to the train station, at the station, on each train, etc. (just to give you an idea of my thoroughness). I talked to men and women, children and old people, customers and employees, and it was FUCKING HARD.

At first it was easy, but after about five sets, AA took over and I could barely move towards strangers. My heart started beating furiously and my veins felt as if they were swelling with cold, molten lead. My mouth got furry and I felt lightheaded and nauseous. I was rendered physiologically ill. Every time I tried to step out of my comfort zone, my body went berserk in protest.

I took a break, drank some water, and got back out there with a new, easier, challenge: get rejected. And it was hard. I asked a busy looking woman for the time. She gave it to me. Low risk, no reward. I asked another woman to answer some bull shit survey questions I just made up (e.g. who lies more, men or women? do I look better with a hat on or off?) and she begrudgingly answered them. I got nervous and bailed. No win there either. Finally as I was running out of time, and hating myself for my failure to overcome my anxiety, I asked a woman at a crosswalk to hit the button even though she wasn't standing as close as I was. Mind you, that took a lot of guts from me: to ask a stranger for help when it was obvious I could help myself. It's not something I would have ever done before yesterday. And she didn't comply. She said "what?" in shock and shook her head. I'll count it.

I didn't get any closes, but I made a couple dozen approaches over the course of the day, more than I'd ever done in the last year. I met a lot of interesting people, I spoke to hot women I would never have come near before, and I got rejected. I'll consider it a success.

Day 2 of rejection therapy isn't going as well, but it's not over yet. And I've already got a free postage stamp I would never have even asked for before I started RT. ;)