Unusually for me, I wrote down no specific goals for this night. I believe this was detrimental.

I made a note in the doc where I keep all these journals to try to find something positive about every reference. So here goes.

I messaged some dude off the RSD forums about meeting up (I actually messaged many dudes, but this is one I was meeting up with tonight). Brought /u/kennotheking with, which was good because the dude ghosted.

So, Kenno opens a two set while I get us drinks (just water for me on this particular night ;D). Seemed to be going well, but it broke down a bit when I handed him his drink. Not sure why. I exchanged some words with him after I gave him his drink, which was fine and even good, because it meant our focus was on us, not the girls (so count that as the positive), but I should have probably engaged the girls. One thing both he and I need to do a better job of is DHV introducing each other when we enter sets. Our natural buddy does this, well, naturally.

Next set was a 3 set on some stairs. Did a good situational opener here. So that’s positive. Set hooked, I talked to two, Ken talked to one.

I was like “ugh, I need to qualify” so I asked them if they liked cats. Lame! I need to hit that TODO I have and memorize a list of qualifying questions. Anyways, they liked cats.

But and so they get interrupted by some dude they know who comes and hugs them, but he ejects quick and goes to the bar. Then they get into some protracted convo of their own about apartments. I jump into the convo Ken is having with the other girl for a bit, but then their “dear friend”, one of the bouncers comes and they get sucked into it with him so we just excuse ourselves. We probably could/should have stuck around.

Next set was a big group. I forgot what I opened with, but I quickly transitioned to commenting on the unique pattern of one of their garbs. These girls were just not having it and wanted to be snarky hoes to attrition us. Unfortunately for them, I am wittier than all of them combined, and so I just plowed through their shit for a bit until I guess they sort of just acquiesced to having us around. These girls weren’t that attractive, and partly because of this their behavior seemed to me to result from their insecurity. Nevertheless, their attitude didn’t really invite sympathy. My goal was basically for them to blow me out harder. I wanted them to tell me to fuck off. I was not interested in being pressured out. So we stuck around just way past welcome.

I mean, it’s good to desensitize one’s self to social pressure exerted by females (in this case easy because the girls weren’t attractive and should have been grateful we spoke to them), but I am not sure how useful/good it is to stay in negative sets. I don’t think I’m going to do it next time, I’ll probably just bounce out, it’s not worth it.

The real “thing” about this is that then we become chodes. I mean, it’s not really because of that last set, it’s just run of the mill approach anxiety. There were at least two sets we should have opened (maybe 3), but we just choded around and then I felt we “couldn’t” open, because we had stuck around the area so long we’d be seen as bitches/creeps for waiting a while. However,

  1. Who cares? Opening is what I gotta do. If I destroy the set ahead of time, then so be it, but it must be opened.
  2. I’ve opened after standing around the set for a bit before, and it’s gone normal in at least some instances. So being in the vicinity for a while before opening is not a death sentence.

There were just normal stupid AA reasons why I didn’t open this two set that looked good. Fuck, I thought I was past basic AA. Normally I can maintain opens throughout. Girls have even complimented me at being bold and direct and good at starting conversations, but then at this point on this night I bitch out and now I feel fraudulent.

I will from now on force myself to open a minimum number of sets per night. At least 6 per night (quantity in the venue permitting, I suppose). I feel like that’s just a bandage on a bigger problem, but for now that will have to do.