Learning non-verbals was probably single handedly the biggest and best thing to happen to my game and my personality overall, even my enjoyment of game. When I first started game, I focused purely on what was being talked about in the conversation and not enough on my posture, my eye contact, my tonality, whether my body was positioned towards or away from them, the proxemics, etc.

People love dynamic tonality, facial expressions, etc. It's more of a show for them, it's fun. Good non-verbals express authenticity, they do a lot of the talking for you. They're a way more honest indicator to others about how you currently feel, about your vibe, your abundance. They give others quick access to information about you that words alone cannot express.

The way I do the exercise is to create a random story for each emotion, for example for anger, I'll riff with something goofy like "Dude, how could you fuck my grandmother. How inconsiderate can you possibly be? I know you said you had a crush on her, but that's just blatantly disrespectful to me and my mother. I know, I know, you told me she enjoyed it, but that isn't the point here. You can fuck someone else's grandmother, I don't care about what you're into, but not mine." And I'll keep going until I most accurately represent that emotion through my story and non-verbals, then switch onto the next emotion.

The point is not always to represent the same emotions you'll be experiencing while talking to a girl, but to generally become more in touch with your emotions, build a greater understanding of how to mimic authentic & strong non-verbal communication, and be able access to those emotions at any point. I call this exercise phase-shifting.

  • I do practice exercises now before I go out each time, just run through a bunch of different emotions and try to make sure I sound authentic, loud, and confident with each emotion. Here's what I look for with my tonality when doing this exercise:
    • Nonchalant tonality, big difference between “Where are you from” with an upwards intonation at the end versus a downwards one
    • Lower more masculine pitch, try to get it a bit raspy, or just as sexy as you can sound
    • Talking more slowly, more relaxed
    • Descending sentences (almost asking things in a monotone way)
    • Vocal projection, loudness, speaking with diaphragm rather than throat: Focusing on amplifying your voice without changing the pitch is critical to not having a pathetic sounding voice, like a super high-pitch sounding tone, speaking from your diaphragm rather than your voice
    • No stuttering. If I stutter, I redo the line until I say it right
    • Authenticity in your tone
    • Not overly enunciating so it sounds less like you’re putting effort into what you’re saying, e.g. “I don really care” vs “I don’t really care”, first one sounds like you’re putting in less effort. It conveys some dude that isn't putting his full effort in to talk to you, he isn't trying hard. I know some will disagree with this so up to you

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  • In terms of facial expressions, they tend to be a bit simpler. Just follow the facial expressions most naturally with the emotion you're conveying. For example with playful teasing, I'll usually do the half eyes shut frat-boy stare and smirk kinda like this emoji 😏, like I know something they don't, put on grounded/masculine/low tonality, and say something like "stop, I know you love me 😏, you're such a dork, I can't stand you, please don't give me that look, we're getting divorced, the marriage is off, you are the biggest goofball I have ever encountered".

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  • Some emotions I switch through:
    • Playful and teasing her
    • Excitement and joy
    • Serious
    • jokingly angry (e.g. shut your damn mouth, I hate you for that 😭)
    • Actually angry
    • Disappointed
    • Practice laughing
    • Annoyed
    • Masculine inside-joke tonality (like “yeah? Is that so? 😏” in tonal form)
    • Aloof/nonchalant/grounded
    • Cool and unreactive
    • Speak in another language
    • Shitty accents

Please drop a follow if you found this useful, I have plenty of posts coming out soon about all the lessons I've learned in game over the next few weeks!