Guy input needed (work)

ilikepie145 · 2019-12-10T00:11:26+00:00

If I knew you had a boyfriend I wouldn’t make any serious advances

stud22 · 2019-12-10T02:01:21+00:00

Jeez, she's just asking for some advise, why do you have to judge her or question her reasons to do whatever she wants to do, if you don't agree then just ignore the post, there's no need to criticize her, live and let live.

3meterpeterr · 2019-12-10T00:41:43+00:00

Since you work together and he knows you have a BF he’s probably avoiding making the first move. That’s just in case anything goes wrong since he doesn’t know how you feel. Look at it from his perspective, if he shoots and misses he’s going to have to deal with this awkward situation at work for AT LEAST 1 month lol. Buut in reality you want him back. I’d say go for the first move, maybe ask him to go out with you one night.

nagaisou · 2019-12-10T02:25:12+00:00

TLDR it would not stop my advances but I will definitely use it as an opportunity to learn her character and adjust my goals accordingly.

PUA 101 would tell guys not to worry about bf when making advances. This makes sense because guys should focus solely on the girl. If the attraction is there, she would break up with the bf.

From my own experience, however, I would use this opportunity to learn more about the girl. Since I already know she has a bf, her reactions to my advances will show what kind of a person she is (at least when it comes to me) and determines how much I should invest.

I would proceed as normal, but if it gets to a point where the flirting became very heavy, or that it starts to get sexual, that’s when her actions become important.

If the girl did not break up with her bf, I will think she’s just in it for the fun of it, and will adjust my expectations accordingly (Perhaps just be F buddies).

If she does do something about the bf, then it shows she’s somewhat serious about us. Again, I would adjust my expectations accordingly.

I must stress I do not make judgement base on one single action of hers. My expectations are more fluid; with each interaction I would adjust it according to the available signs and evidences. I treat every opportunity as a chance to learn more about the person, and what I want to do with them comes after.

CloudFootprint · 2019-12-10T02:28:30+00:00

Putting myself in his shoes, you have a boyfriend and you're a coworker. It's too risky to make a move. Break up with your current boyfriend, and mention it in the conversation. Then mention wanting to check out this coffee shop/bar/restaurant/whatever, and see if he bites.

biggersean · 2019-12-10T08:48:36+00:00

this is basically the story of jim and pam from the office

quinnmcd · 2019-12-10T13:36:18+00:00

this post had to be taken down because it appears to be focused on a specific situation or person.

Any posts about a specific situational advice with a specific person should be directed to /r/askSeddit. (Note that is askSEDDIT, not askREDDIT.)

ghenney · 2019-12-10T00:49:55+00:00

You could be totally justified here but...don’t you think you should break up with your current bf before asking reddit if this other dude will fuck you or not? Seems like you’re already planning your next fuck before your man even knows you’re dumping him

Title	Guy input needed (work)
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	0
Comments	8
Date	December 9, 2019 11:59 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/e8idr2/guy_input_needed_work/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/guy-input-needed-work.1485755 https://theredarchive.com/post/1485755

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