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How can I improve this?

punkerdante182 · 2011-08-13T09:36:40+00:00

So I'm looking to improve my messaging game. I've made it into a game. Mostly because online messaging is kind of bs and I'd rather a...

punkerdante182

August 13, 2011

0 upvotes

/r/seduction

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Post Information

Title	How can I improve this?
Author	punkerdante182
Upvotes	0
Comments	9
Date	August 13, 2011 9:36 AM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/jhlgk/how_can_i_improve_this/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-can-i-improve-this.1321255 https://theredarchive.com/post/1321255

Comments

[–]expletive-deleted 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link

You are offering your info. Not a good idea. I've found it far more productive to take it slow. Girls are much more leery online, and assume all guys are creeps until they prove themselves otherwise. I've always had luck by simply talking to them online for a few weeks to build rapport before suggesting we meet up. When you immediately fish for a date, you're telling her the following:

You only like her for her looks because its impossible to have gotten to know her.

You are qualifying yourself to her rather than the other way around.

If you are constantly trying to please her, she will not respect you. Women want men who have a backbone and take responsibility, that can tell her what she wants when she can't make up her mind.

In short, you're trying way too fucking hard. Don't work on one girl at a time either. Also, don't respond as soon as she replies. Give it some time. You don't want her to think you're some creepo who hangs out all day on his computer pathetically trying to impress girls, right? Give her some time to wonder about you and anticipate your response. She needs to check her inbox and wonder why you haven't responded. Then she might even imagine what you're out doing.

Don't try to escalate so quickly. When you don't try to escalate, she will wonder why, and now the shoe's on the other foot: "is this guy just not into me? Maybe I've been friend zoned."

You cannot get friend zoned on the Internet. By acting like she's only a friend, she will end up trusting you more. Trust leads to meet up, because now you're harmless. But what's this? Now she's finally met you in person, shes getting all the details about you that cannot be conveyed through text: the sound of your voice, your mannerisms, etc. She will be infinitely more comfortable and attracted to you than if she had just met you.

[–]punkerdante182[S] 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

I don't. My goal was to make a template 'game' that I could play that I could use instead of writing detailed individual messages to every girl. Sort of a best sum game. I would send these messages and play the games with girls. My first question weeds out women that aren't nerdy or don't like to have fun. If they don't answer or say that the question is "stupid" then chances are I wouldn't want to date them anyways. After they get the question right they find out it's actually a game show. I like this because instead of the standard boring "hey your into blah di blah? so am I!" back and forth I've now made it into something fun and not even related to dating. This also avoids the conversation losing momentum by talking about boring details of each others lives. I'd honestly rather learn that in person anyways. The whole point of the game is to get to meeting while keeping the details of who they are to a minimum. I can and want to learn all that later. Yea I'm going by her looks but this after a quick skim of her profile to make sure she's not psycho or any other red flags. Her looks are all I have to go on at this point

I don't get the trying to please her part. The women I message genuinely feel like there is a chance they could get a question wrong.

The escalate thing I feel is necessary. I've had way to many messages just fizzle out because it's next to impossible to build attraction online.

You can easily get friend zoned on the net. It's happened more times than not that's why I escalate quickly to avoid this.

[–]expletive-deleted 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]punkerdante182[S] 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]expletive-deleted 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]punkerdante182[S] 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]hexalite 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]hexalite1 points 14 years ago* [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link

I don't know about this. I've managed to quickly meet with girls within a few messages just by being honest and upfront early about talking in person rather than message and meeting in a really public place. I offer my number first and give them a chance to call me if they like. I'm not on OkCupid a lot but it's worked 3 times out of 5 times. "Trust" comes with honesty, not multiple choice games, lol, so I agree with that.

I think the issue with your game is that it was fun and then got serious quickly. In your last reply you forced her into your previous options which she initially avoided. It's a big switch in mood and that's why it could be seen as "creepy", it's uncomfortable.

Perhaps make your game longer so you can move it into personalized discussion. eg "pick: you get to talk to me about a) sex b) love c) rock and roll d) fashion e) etc..." I don't know. lol talk about how ninjas would have sex and have a fun conversation around that

[–]punkerdante182[S] 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link