Fellow Sedditors, honorable seekers of self-actualization, focus the fuck up for a second. I've got something interesting, possibly even exciting. What follows is a review of a Real Social Dynamics “Hotseat” event with instructor Alexander. It’s pretty late after the event, but I’ve been busy and I wanted to write the review after I’d had a little time to internalize the concepts and see if they work. You're redditors and, to various degrees, you're involved in this fringe shadow society of pickup, and so naturally you must be skeptical of anybody reviewing a company's event. You're right to be. After all, this is the Internet and people have agendas, especially in the cut-throat industry of pickup guru-ism.

I'm not an employee of Real Social Dynamics, nor do I have any affiliation with them. I make no secret though (at least in these circles) that I'm thrilled about the way Real Social Dynamics has taken the game. I am biased, and indeed was biased going in, but I will try to be fair. It doesn't matter who I am, but I NEVER thought I would go far enough down the pickup rabbit hole to attend a pickup event, but, I happened to be in New York fucking city.

ME: Relationship for a three years, emotional breakup, and then back to my dirty wayzzzz... Game on. Until NYC, I had never had a schooled wing, just naturals. I gamed using this pickup jazz within my social circle of human friends and at bars. I always kind of half assed it, probably over-teased, and was too light on physicality. My general skill level I would say had been intermediate with flashes of brilliance and, as often, Down's syndrome. I decided to take an adventure to NYC from a smaller Midwestern, and spent a couple months in the city, bouncing around couches and going broke. My game started to evolve since visiting to New York. Y'all PUAs are everywhere in every big city, and New York city is as big as it gets. Not only that, but you know what you’re doing. Good work. His name is Robert Paulson.

;)

About a month ago I attended in an RSD free tour and "hotseat" event with RSD instructor Alexander in the glorious Gold Room of Pennsylvania Hotel, right in the heart of Midtown Manhattan. (A famous scene in Ghostbusters was filmed there!) I knew I was home when, outside the hotel, amongst the hustle and bustle of the heart of NYC, were two well dressed dudes with cool haircuts. They were standing side-by-side, eyes closed, fists stretched skyward like Rocky or Steve Holt. To eviscerate any doubt as to who they were, I joined their line of glory and asked, “What are we doing?”

“Summoning a demon.” “Which demon are we summoning?” “Alexander”

THE EVENT

I am breaking this review into two sections. In the first, will describe the event itself, and leave my subsequent experiences as a comment (Because otherwise the post is too long) So far, evidence suggests that the event was beyond helpful. I've learned a lot. Nine out of ten stars for the hotseat. The seminar consisted mostly of in field footage of Alex, which served as a framework for Alex himself to teach his approach to Austrailian-Swedish diplomacy. The footage was shot over a period of years, since 2009, letting us watch his progression from a seemingly total spaz who, by not going away and using some weird voodoo, pulled hot girls, to a cool and normal guy who, through hanging around and using some weird voodoo, pulled even hotter girls.

Alex's game is tight, and to me a breath of fresh air, but to women I'd imagine its more like being eased into a warm bath, and tickled every once in a while by little bursts of carbonation. He's not flashy. He's the turtle that slowly and steadily wins the race by never doubting himself and being there at the finish line. If you've ever read the Art of Seduction, he's somewhat the charmer archetype. I would imagine Juggler operates in a little bit in the same way. He gives women nothing to object too strongly to, and no reason to reject him. He's teflon, silk, smooth.

Alexander thinks that his style might be the future of spitting game. He might be onto something, if not for everybody, at least for a portion of men who feel less than congruent being all pickup-like and who get in their head too much. He seems dangerously close to being the stereotypical nice guy, the one that gets blown out and walked over, but he couldn’t be further from it. He has incorporated the perfect recipe to reap the benefits of being pleasant and nice, while avoiding the “nice guy’s” pitfalls, namely, of being stigmatized as boring.

This approach is vastly different from, say, RSD's Julian, who says some WILD-ass shit that sometimes intensely offends, creating attraction with strong emotional spikes, and has higher risk for the higher reward. It's severe game. It works faster, but just like Price is Right, if you go overboard, you’re fucked. Alex, by contrast, has chill game. He's a little goofy friendly to everyone, touchy feely but in a way that progresses at a crawling and unthreatening pace, and to the untrained eye he might even look like he's never even heard of seduction. He will gladly leave the club with a girl he hasn't kissed, because he knows that he can and will. He's building intensity, and keeping her guessing (usually.) His game is almost invisible, and part of it is just because he's been doing it so long, but an equal part of it is because he's become natural. It's almost anti-game as we've come to know it. The good news is it's effective. You should have seen some of these women. The better news is that it's replicable. You can do it. The best news is it's fun. I can't stop going out now.

THE TEACHINGS

Here's my synopsis of Alexander’s major talking points, spiced with my own input and analogies.

1) There's no reason you're not enough. It always boils down to the same thing: confidence. Confidence to do whatever or whomever you want because you're no different from any other man out there. She’s hoping deep down to go home with somebody right? There’s NO REASON it shouldn’t be you. Unless you have hygiene problems or you believe you’re not enough, that somebody is you. That level of self belief is easier said than achieved sometimes, but supremely true and important, and well put. This phrase was drilled into our heads repeatedly. That's the whole point of this game shit anyway, at least inner game. If we all believe that we are enough, truly, we can pretty much get any girl we want, any life we want. You probably know this in your brain, but not in your heart. You are the one, Neo. Without believing this, you'll give up too soon. I like his way of wording it though, because of its use of negatives. “You’re good enough” is coddling, but this is more of a “shut the fuck up with your limiting beliefs champ, you’re better than that. No excuses!”

2) Stimulation is what women dig. Be stimulating, not arousing. Alexander doesn't care for building attraction (or so he claims.) Instead, he prefers to stimulate. Women live for this. Diamonds are shiny. Songs are happy, or sad, or angry, or make you want to dance. Men do things. All sorts of unpredictable things that make her feel good, and on occasion, bad. Or curious. BOOM! Woah! Hey, you’re pretty. I hate you. Because I want to be pretty too. Haha, you're funny. Compliment, say something that'll get her just a little mad, touch her. Take a confident sip of her drink. Give her a little gift, but as a sudden surprise. Kiss her friend on the cheek. As long as you are pushing any and all types of little buttons continually, and never going too far towards positive or negative, you’re golden.

Even though he never skews too far towards either polarity, he places intense importance on saying a lot of negative and positive things, enough to never tip the scales and blow the jig. You want to give little spikes and stay interesting. Anything interesting is stimulation. If she doesn't comply when you try to hold her hand for instance, that's fucking FINE. Keep going. Instead of getting all in your head that you don't "have compliance," be happy because it was the right move that you made. It don't matter none that she didn’t take your hand, because it still excites her that you're the kind of man who tried, and you're fun, and empathetic. It's a little thrill for her, a burst of fission. It's stimulating. For all you know, she didn’t take your hand because she’s playing hard to get, or she’s not sold on you YET, or because she’s being watched. It doesn’t matter, because 5 out of 5 times you’re more interesting than the guy who didn’t try it, even if you get slapped.

3) Your two best friends are quality time and the front door of the venue.

Her attraction to you is a function of time. This is key. Stick with a girl you like. Talk to her for ages. Build comfort. Just hang out, it'll be fine, yo! BE THE BEST AT WASTING TIME! Be the master of having fun in the set that “isn’t going anywhere.” If you're worried that she'll get sick of you from overexposure, you're not being confident enough. She's acquainting herself with your personality. She's getting used to your touch. Even if she's not giving you any signals, you just persist chilling and know that you'll be fine. Keep talking to her. You don't need to necessarily escalate physically right away, but get a nice baseline level of physicality and maintain it. Keep it up, and keep it up, and keep it up. Time and light pressure will make diamonds. You’re building comfort. Lobsters won't put up a fight if you start the water at room temperature, and raise the degrees slowly to a bubble over hours. They'll let themselves boil . Pump it up very gradually. Attraction is a function of time. You know how girlfriends and mothers etc always want to spend time together? Women are fucked up like that. They like to hang out.

A shocking example of counterintuitive female behavior, which Alex pointed out, was observed in that a lot of these girls weren't giving him any ostensible signals that they were interested in him. This sometimes lasted up until just minutes before going home with him or doing the no pants dance in the club bathroom. It was bizarre, and a body language analyst’s nightmare, but it wasn't because he can sense something we can't. (Well, perhaps a little bit) He's just confident. There was a moment in one of the videos where he wass talking to a woman who gave absolutely no signs of interest, appearing even slightly aloof, but when Alex suddenly just took her hand to lead her somewhere (and because he was walking in front of her and leading, could no longer see her face) the video paused. Alex told us to look at her face in that moment. She was grinning from ear to ear, but didn't want him to see it. If she's still around you, you’re doing something right.

All this time and effort will likely be moot if you don't befriend the most important member of the set: the venue’s EXIT! Leave with her. Leave with her. Exit when she does, together. Be together as you exit even if that means having to sprint and push people out of the way to do so. Alex is a little obsessed with the front door. He stressed it WAY more than I had ever heard of before, or made sense to me before two weeks ago. If you don't pass through into the world outside of the club or bar or party with her, you will be labeled that guy from in the club, and then forgotten. If you can’t leave with her or she has to leave early, walk her through the door. If she disappears, walk through the door with somebody at least. The door is magic.

TO BE CONTINUED