I’ve hit a wall when it comes to my progress in seduction. I’m currently 33. I can regularly pull girls that are slightly above average. But anyone that I actually like gets repelled almost immediately. I can sometimes act indifferent towards women that I like and that works for a while until I crack. It feels like I’ve hit a ceiling and wondering how to break through to the next level. I’m bored and curious if I’m just hard stuck here forever or if there’s something I’m doing wrong. I mostly use dating apps, meet girls through friends, and go to bars. My next venture will be meeting women doing hobbies I really enjoy but even then I think I’m going to be limited by my current skill set.

My approach is pretty simple. I usually just put myself out there and see if there’s mutual interest. Make casual conversation whether in person or online. Try to find something we have in common and connect verbally. Then I get their phone number if there’s a vibe and take them on dates.

First date is typically drinks - I rotate between a coffee shop near my house that serves wine, a tiki bar or a whiskey bar at an old school turned food hall. I pick a place that suits the girl’s vibe the most. Here I keep things light, flirty, with a bit of banter. Sometimes I’ll take the conversation into more serious avenues but I try to stray from that. If things are going very well and the girl is receptive I’m open to having sex but don’t lead with it as my intention.

Second date is usually an activity date. I’ve been taking dates to a popular pool hall. I’m no shark but I’ve been getting better to the point where I can consistently beat girls in most games. I don’t play to win and focus on having fun and making sure she’s having a good time. Usually this date is a continuation of where we left off on the first. Activity dates feel like my comfort zone. It takes the pressure off of us and makes getting to know someone feel a bit more natural. Sometimes I’ll follow it up with food, usually I’ll save that for date 3.

Third date is when I usually try to close. My friends have recently critiqued me saying that I need to stop making this such a hard set rule. They told me that waiting anywhere between 1-3 months for sex could be ok. Maybe that’s the case but I usually lose interest here if we don’t have some sort of physical intimacy by this point. Typically I’ll do a dinner date for this date. Sometimes I’ll take them to a local tea house for a bit of a quieter vibe to get to know them more on a personal level. I like this date to be a bit more emotionally charged and even a little bit vulnerable.

Beyond 3 dates is a place I don’t reach often nowadays - either I don’t like them or they don’t like me. But from there on out it’s the Wild West so anything goes. I try to cater dates specific to the girl and her interests.

That about sums up my current state of game. In the new year my goal is to only date women that I find physically and emotionally attractive. Take more risks. Approach more during the day. Other than that I’m out of ideas for what I could be doing wrong.

Given all of that is there anything else I can do to break through my current skill level?