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ThatDarnSmell Archive

View 0 posts and 1,958 comments by ThatDarnSmell on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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4

Guys need to stop with the "I missed out on xyz" limiting beliefs. It really doesn't matter. Plenty of guys voluntarily put their dating and sex life on hold to pursue other priorities. A friend from my graduating class years ago had no shame admitting he didn't get laid until his 30s as he was in a very demanding career path to be a neurosurgeon. So he was at least 33 or so and didn't whine about it. It's not like you're penalized for going at your own pace.
/r/seduction27/01/26 08:22 AM
2

Move on. Plus, little things like lying about age would be an instant dealbreaker for me no matter the level of relationship.
/r/seduction14/01/26 05:11 AM
14

She's sick. Give her some time on her own to recover.
/r/seduction14/01/26 05:09 AM
1

Please seek help. At least you're aware of it and that's a good step. But anyone who brings past unresolved traumas into a new relationship should not be dating. Period. You can't be mistreating others. I had to get a restraining order against my ex.
/r/seduction13/01/26 08:59 PM
1

This has to be PUA satire.
/r/seduction13/01/26 08:55 PM
1

Get off the internet and work on yourself first.
/r/seduction13/01/26 08:54 PM
1

She's more reserved and you don't want a relationship while she likely does. The best course here is to move on and let her find someone more in tune with her culture and values.
/r/seduction13/01/26 08:53 PM
0

Stuff comes up and that's life. Don't be immature about it. She even expressed wanting to see you and so you can both do that after both of your activities for the day are finished.
/r/seduction13/01/26 08:51 PM
3

I would also place apps and social media at the bottom of the list. Status certainly helps much of the time and can easily offset having money. First responders and military types will always be pretty universally desired by women, for example, even in a place here like LA where they are making a comfortable living but not wealthy by any means. Social circle is probably among the most overlooked. My current girlfriend along with several previous were met through mutual friend groups, along with …
/r/seduction13/01/26 08:47 PM
2

No one cares about "lays." Focus on finding a woman you like for multiple qualities beyond looks. You're treating this like a video game and that's just not working out. Try to seek a greater connection and worry less about either of your looks. It sounds like you're rather robotic in these pursuits and the women you want are probably more turned off by your gamesmanship than your appearance.
/r/seduction13/01/26 08:41 PM
5

Read up on BPD. It's a very serious mental health disorder and you're likely coming across women with it. Don't get involved. And keep all interactions in public with witnesses around. They can get extremely violent. People with it are often like scared feral animals who can and will randomly lash out at the people they feel are betraying/abandoning them. My ex-wife has it and it was a nightmare to deal with.
/r/seduction13/01/26 08:37 PM
8

Not saying it's BPD just based on your Cliff's Notes write-up, but constant hot/cold behavior and early lovebombing with random cold behavior are typical signs of the disorder. My ex-wife could go from "love you so much. I'm glad we have each other forever" to "I fucking hate you. We should just divorce" in the same day.
/r/seduction13/01/26 08:31 PM
1

In years past it made more sense to wait. But now everyone has a smartphone on them pretty much all the time. People are seeing your texts. If I'm not busy and I see a text, I'll respond to it promptly. However, you need to establish comfortable boundaries. My ex-wife was definitely one of those people to blow up and rage over texts or calls that weren't immediately responded/answered.
/r/seduction13/01/26 11:39 AM
1

My highest rejection rates by far were women older than me. Guys think it'll be really easy, but confident and successful women with their acts together tend to really know what they want.
/r/seduction13/01/26 11:36 AM
6

Most women likely do use them for attention, validation and boredom. The golden days of more traditional online dating are long gone. Now it's just Tik Tok style swiping and having brain rot conversations. I used to enjoy it when people were using computers, writing detailed profiles and so forth. But the landscape changed for the no attention span smartphone crowd. I completely eliminated apps and don't miss them in their modern form.
/r/seduction13/01/26 11:32 AM
6

You can make the most of any surrounding. Rural can be tougher, obviously, and it may require the addition of apps to expand reach. I mainly just hang out in Santa Monica, Venice and Marina del Rey. I can go months without visiting Hollywood, WeHo, Downtown LA, or really any of the known "party zones" of LA and prefer the spot I'm in. The beach areas are more my style and are cooler weather as well. I don't like self limiting beliefs that millions of people need to be around to find a date.
/r/seduction09/01/26 11:38 PM
1

Don't worry about it. 22's still really young and you have plenty of chances. Take it day by day. Looking back, if I could go back and prioritize at 22 chasing women would probably be at the bottom of the priority list. I'd highly recommend to use free time learning about investing. The sooner you start, the more your wealth grows no matter how little you start with.
/r/seduction09/01/26 11:29 PM
2

I'd say you didn't miss much as far as dating and women other than flings and really dumb parties. I'm now in my 30s and rarely even think back to hook ups. I find relationship sex infinitely more enjoyable, meaningful and memorable. At 22, you still are basically in the college age range, but I wouldn't recommend hanging on a campus if you're not a student as you'd technically be loitering/trespassing. But you should easily be able to meet people even without college in your early 20s. People a…
/r/seduction09/01/26 11:24 PM
1

Most PUA garbage falls into the outdated category.
/r/seduction09/01/26 11:17 PM
2

I think being in a frat definitely helped. I was a student-athlete and it just seemed like something else to do at the time, but there definitely were a lot of parties and social engagements. It wasn't the only route, though. College in general is by far the easiest time to meet and mingle when everyone else has that kind of free time and lives in a bubble.
/r/seduction09/01/26 09:13 PM
11

I don't venture into the city of Los Angeles to date or find dates and do just fine in the smaller surrounding cities.
/r/seduction09/01/26 08:59 PM
1

OP, I got divorced at 32 after a very toxic marriage that resulted in a bitter divorce. I also took time away from dating to regroup and heal. I just didn't have the energy and frame of mind to jump right back into it. You're in a good decade for dating compared to 20s. Most guys have left behind the days of partying and being uncertain about life direction by then, along with more money and a stable career, or at least the early stages. You can always meet new people through shared interest gro…
/r/seduction09/01/26 07:28 AM
1

I also live in SoCal. There are plenty of people of various ideologies. Statistically, the overwhelming majority of couples belong to the same religion and political party. Having differences without being on the same page is often a reason for breakup if you wait too late to both discuss. Most people who "lean left" end up with that kind of partner or vice versa. Similarly, Christians tend to date Christians. "You" may not care about her views, but she may care about yours not aligning. If you'…
/r/seduction09/01/26 07:15 AM
12

I was upfront about it during my hookup phase. If you want regular sex, having a girlfriend will provide you with more sex than you likely need.
/r/seduction09/01/26 07:12 AM
0

OP's life resolves around only himself and he can't relate. People with kids talk about their kids. It's nothing new or surprising. If it's a single parent who is burdened with full responsibility, then more than usual talk wouldn't be out of the ordinary. They're people, not goldfish.
/r/seduction09/01/26 07:08 AM
1

You already ignored the best advice that you don't want to hear of continuing to work on yourself, your schooling, and working on starting your career. That obviously doesn't mean you can't go on dates. But it doesn't sound like you're really in a position to do much else at your current state. At 26, I was completely done with all schooling, had a mortgage, was building up my company and was engaged to be married. From what you've said, you're still several steps back and there's nothing wrong …
/r/seduction08/01/26 08:36 PM
1

Grow up, OP. These are parents who are invested in their kids' upbringing and proud of them. It's hard work. One of humanities' primary purposes is building a family and raising children. Once you die, they'll be the ones carrying on your legacy. It's not just mothers and single moms who talk about their kids. Married and single dads will talk to you about their family as well.
/r/seduction08/01/26 08:23 PM
1

I don't use social media other than Facebook and am doing just fine, as are millions of others.
/r/seduction08/01/26 08:20 PM
1

Your situation is among the easiest scenarios. You already go to the same school and share the same classes. Just talk to them.
/r/seduction08/01/26 08:18 PM
2

They're over the hill "PUA" drama queens. Ignore them.
/r/seduction08/01/26 08:17 PM
1

Could be a lot of things like IBS, acid reflux, etc. See a doctor.
/r/seduction08/01/26 08:16 PM
5

Ditch the dating apps. It sounds like you might be more satisfied by social circle game. Try meeting people through friends, shared interest groups, etc. Some of my best relationships were with women I knew beforehand.
/r/seduction08/01/26 08:13 PM
18

Find other ways to use your time than reaching out to an ex. You'd be entering toxic waters and there's no need for it at this point after you've both healed and moved on.
/r/seduction08/01/26 08:08 PM
1

Not too often.
/r/seduction07/01/26 09:36 AM
27

Agree 100%. I don't even think back to my hookup phase much, nor do I miss it. But I definitely think of the times I fumbled in keeping a great woman.
/r/seduction07/01/26 09:24 AM
1

The guy you were responding to is a troll playing the persona of a 2000s era PUA as a nearly 50 year old.
/r/seduction06/01/26 07:36 AM
1

Assuming you're not trolling, you should really consider first going through the vaccination process for both HPV and Hep. This takes some time and so don't hook up with anyone until you've completed the series. PrEP also would heavily lower the odds of HIV transmission if you ended up with people who had and are transmitting the disease. Regardless, condoms. But as to finding someone, I'm sure you could find where others congregate in your area. Or you could just use an app. Just be very cautio…
/r/seduction06/01/26 07:15 AM
1

You both sound pretty young and immature. What are your goals? If it takes a plane to see each other, that's pretty poor logistics.
/r/seduction06/01/26 07:05 AM
3

Body count is as useless as Reddit karma. It'd be like listing your high school GPA on a resume. No one will ever care about it and it may hinder your process of obtaining an LTR as you clearly lack experience and mental stability. As someone else suggested, therapy may be worth seeking. A doctor may also prescribe the right medications for your conditions. At your current state you definitely don't sound like "boyfriend material," but at least you're aware you have some issues that need to be a…
/r/seduction06/01/26 06:50 AM
0

Communicate with her. As someone pointed out, she could flip the script and bring up the possibility of it being MMF. Also, you randomly bringing it up could signal to her that you want a permissible excuse to "cheat." And that's assuming you are involved with the woman who isn't your wife. I personally would never engage in a threesome. Others who have tend to claim the wife and woman #2 get frisky and you watch in that scenario while only being involved with your wife. That could probably work…
/r/seduction05/01/26 09:34 PM
2

Sex is generally far more more enjoyable once you both have established chemistry and are a couple.
/r/seduction05/01/26 07:17 PM
4

Time travel to 2007.
/r/seduction05/01/26 12:39 AM
1

Why are you being her penpal on social media instead of setting up a date over the phone?
/r/seduction04/01/26 01:55 AM
1

I'll assume you're both teenagers by the immature games and the way you both handled the situation. Build more comfort and don't make odd critiques after kissing someone.
/r/seduction04/01/26 01:52 AM
2

You probably don't know any more than them. That's the most immature group of women.
/r/seduction04/01/26 01:49 AM
2

You don't need paid coaching as nearly all of them will just have marketing and sales type experience. They're most likely no better than you at dating. They rely on guys with no self esteem as easy prey.
/r/seduction04/01/26 01:47 AM
2

Same here. I'm fairly close in age, almost 35. I find around +/- five years is a good sweetspot for life experience and emotional/financial maturity. Maybe late 20s at a minimum is a fair starting point from my experiences. But I will say, after going on a ton of dates after my divorce with women ages 23-40 or so, I definitely far prefer over 30. The women closer to 40 rejected at a far higher rate and that's understandable as most women over time seek the stability and seriousness of a guy arou…
/r/seduction02/01/26 06:47 PM
3

For me it was probably marriage and divorce. I realized more what I value in a partner and what things i just with no longer tolerate with people. Like now I wouldn't have sex or go on additional dates with anyone if I sense a toxic mental state such as NPD/BPD.
/r/seduction02/01/26 06:42 PM
-1

OP is on a roll with satire threads.
/r/seduction02/01/26 06:39 PM
26

You went into the date with a defeated mindset that she already didn't like you. What was the point of even going if you don't think highly of yourself or of her?
/r/seduction02/01/26 06:38 PM
1

Do it for you, your health and your self confidence. It also could help to create a more structured and disciplined lifestyle if you don't have one already. Muscles and so forth will impress other guys more than women.
/r/seduction02/01/26 06:35 PM
1

I didn't say that. I've had several LTR, including a marriage. My hook-up phase was from around ages 18-21 and I rarely even think of the casual flings, nor do I seek them. It was more of a learning experience. But I think about the meaningful relationships I've had, along with the failures. Over time many people mature and realize sex adds value to a relationship but it isn't everything; a relationship shouldn't be built with sex as the centerpiece. You can use your life to create your own mean…
/r/seduction02/01/26 06:19 PM
1

Try to find more qualifiers than "smoking hot." Overly attractive also often comes at the sacrifice of her being crazy and having mental health issues that will never be resolved as she just wears you down and moves on to the next mark attracted to her appearance. I'm in LA in the US and there are a lot of really attractive women over 30, 40, etc. You have to look for more than it and try to find someone you really gel.with on an intellectual level, on a teamwork level and so forth. You don't wa…
/r/seduction31/12/25 08:42 PM
1

Say hello, talk to her and get her number. Don't overthink the interaction or the outcomes; just live in the moment and maintain a present state of mind.
/r/seduction31/12/25 08:38 PM
1

The most attractive women tend to be the craziest and most destructive. I was married to one. The few "10s" I dated, included my wife, have BPD, NPD or both. I've yet to find a normal one in the wild. The hot-crazy matrix jokingly refers to them as "unicorns" but there's unofficial truth in it.
/r/seduction31/12/25 08:24 PM
1

That's an odd predicament to be relying on a single old photo from years ago. Is talking to and approaching people in public not working out for you? You definitely don't want to bank your dating success on just having a picture that you think is pretty good.
/r/seduction31/12/25 02:18 AM
2

You must not be looking very closely if you can't find attractive women over 40. I'm turning 35 and went on multiple dates with women around 40, but I tend to receive the highest rejection prevalence by women older than me even if it's a year. My current girlfriend is 32 but there were several women I pursued a few years older. I personally wouldn't date younger than around 28 or older than around 41-42. I find +/- five years to be about the perfect sweetspot. I really doubt your area's in some …
/r/seduction31/12/25 02:09 AM
5

Indeed. I'd always take one meaningful relationship over hundreds of one night stands.
/r/seduction31/12/25 02:03 AM
0

I'd definitely recommend keeping online dating your lowest priority, say 10% or so of your investment. It might help to keep your pictures less processed/filtered if you can. Do you have any friends who are decently skilled with photography? An actual pro photographer should be able to get really good photos of you by directing on posture, better understanding lighting, camera settings, etc but you'd have to pay. But you can also go less professional and just have photos of you taken expressing …
/r/seduction31/12/25 01:57 AM
1

Realize that most channels doing such a thing would most likely stage them. I live in LA where influencers are a dime a dozen and they're everywhere in sight. I've even been approached multiple times and asked if I'd like to be in a "social experiment video" where they want you to react the way they tell you, say what they tell you, etc. A select few might actually enjoy the process but most end up hating that it's a total grind to get clicks and views and so they stage the content to get the ex…
/r/seduction30/12/25 07:04 PM
1

You might need to work on your mental health first. It's not normal to be overly hyper-vigilant 24/7.
/r/seduction30/12/25 06:59 PM
1

The best resource is only making apps maybe 10% at most of your dating time. Talk to people in person for the direct feedback and human interaction. On apps you're just clawing for a "chance" to even speak to someone. And then it's through text, which is a very impersonal and hypermodern communication form. You aren't going to be texting on your dates.
/r/seduction30/12/25 06:53 PM
1

You should have no problem. Home owner, stable career and 5'11" are my stats as well. I even hang out with a volleyball group where nearly everyone is 6 feet+ or taller. You are only in competition with yourself. Get out there and meet people in person.
/r/seduction30/12/25 06:50 PM
9

Pretty decent generalized pointers. I'd say definitely try to live a more analog lifestyle. Put down your phone in public and don't take it out of your pocket unless it's to check the time if you aren't wearing a watch. On that note, just get a non-smartwatch watch so you can turn your phone off. Talk to people in public. Ask your friends and people you know if they're down for a phone call every now and then. Don't just text everyone; it's an impersonal and hypermodern 21st century form of comm…
/r/seduction30/12/25 07:39 AM
2

At 22, you have much greater priorities to work on like saving money, starting to invest, working towards a career and so forth. Don't worry about your dating life. You can obviously try for dates, but it's no big deal if you aren't having much luck with it.
/r/seduction30/12/25 07:34 AM
1

You don't flirt or make any advancements. Put those thoughts to rest.
/r/seduction30/12/25 07:30 AM
-1

Yes, with my girlfriend.
/r/seduction29/12/25 06:17 PM
1

You can go for a walk, have a talk with some scenery and so forth without spending any money. But if you can't even afford coffee and ice cream, you really need to work on improving your income right now. Dating may be something you should put on hold for now. Use it as motivation to work harder. Then you can take women out.
/r/seduction29/12/25 06:15 PM
6

But coaches have this "one thing" holding you back. You just have to pay for their monthly newsletters, pay for bootcamps, pay for one on one calls, and empty your savings to find it. And then it probably won't work because they're no better at dating than you.
/r/seduction29/12/25 06:12 PM
2

Not clever, but probably not marrying or really escalating with certain LTR who I had much better chemistry with than my ex-wife.
/r/seduction29/12/25 06:09 PM
1

You can't possibly do that. I mean, it's probably not the best idea to have a 3+ hour conversation right before the first date. But I've certainly added many dates to social media first where they had access to thousands of posts I'd made over the years on Facebook, etc. If anything it added some level of congruence and comfort as many were to IRL people, family, etc. If a few messages on apps or a FaceTime "gives everything away," then you may have nothing going on. Just look at the average bio…
/r/seduction29/12/25 05:06 PM
1

Are you also meeting women in public? You may be really wasting time trying to get through with apps. I no longer use them and don't miss them a bit.
/r/seduction29/12/25 06:27 AM
1

Too corny and generic pick-up'y as others mentioned. Be more genuine and curious.
/r/seduction29/12/25 05:13 AM
1

Move on. There are plenty of available women out there who aren't a sister of one of your friends.
/r/seduction29/12/25 02:21 AM
2

You're on the right path with some caveats. Meet people and try to better the community out of a genuine wanting to do so, not out of a need to impress. For example, I have been involved with beach volleyball and climbing groups for years and help people out when I can because they're activities I enjoy and am good at. I've met a few girlfriends over the years through them but not out of a desperate need to impress. It was simply due to us both having commonalities through similar interests.
/r/seduction28/12/25 11:53 PM
3

You're getting some terrible advice. The whole backbone of going on dates is to get to know each other and see if you'd make a potentially worthwhile couple. She needs to know about you and you to know about her. It's beyond silly to think anyone "already knows too much about you." That's just not possible based on a few messages on apps. Don't be purposefully aloof as some kind of dating strategy. You want a potential partner who can communicate well and that includes you doing the same.
/r/seduction28/12/25 11:47 PM
1

Keep yourself busy and stop thinking about it. Use that time for more important things like investment strategies.
/r/seduction28/12/25 11:43 PM
30

You have to get your mental health in order before doing any more approaches.
/r/seduction28/12/25 11:41 PM
7

With someone that forward you probably should've been vaccinated for HPV and Hep first. Wear a condom.
/r/seduction28/12/25 05:29 PM
15

The guys you know who are "alphas" aren't trying to be one. But the guys trying to be one aren't "alpha." And pretty much anyone calling himself an alpha probably isn't one.
/r/seduction28/12/25 08:43 AM
2

That shouldn't bother you. Just think of how many guys are bald already at your age.
/r/seduction28/12/25 05:41 AM
1

Don't change your personality to "attract different demographics." That's crossing into deception and is poor inner game in general. If you're acting completely differently around dates then your friends, you're doing something wrong.bobvioisku I don't mean making advances and so forth, but your general demeanor should be similar.
/r/seduction28/12/25 05:37 AM
1

Best tip is to consistently wear earplugs every time you go.
/r/seduction28/12/25 05:32 AM
14

I had that realization as well that sex isn't nearly as important as I'd thought. But I realized it during my marriage. I was having sex every day, many times twice. But it was really about the only glue that kept us together. I didn't vet her well enough while dating and now I'll sometimes go at a snail's pace to get to know and a better idea of what she's like. So I guess my realization moment was in my early 30s.
/r/seduction28/12/25 05:30 AM
1

Any reason you're not cold approaching? Or joining shared interest groups?
/r/seduction28/12/25 05:25 AM
1

Status has some ambiguity. As I mentioned in the thread, military, firefighters, and law enforcement are examples that all carry status without money or fame. Those are universally "hot" professions to most women on some level as it's an easy way to demonstrate you have leadership and protector qualities. And on Leo vs. Bezos, there's no comparison. Bezos is top of the s-tier when it comes to having money, status and fame. Sure, Leo has all of those plus looks. But we're talking a mega-billionai…
/r/seduction28/12/25 02:42 AM
2

This has to satire or trolling. If you're scrolling on apps in a public setting like that, then you shouldn't be there.
/r/seduction27/12/25 07:28 PM
1

Waiting for sex is just fine. I often do as I've had multiple LTR including a marriage and I'm fine with being picky to maximize the vetting process and spend more time getting to know. If you're going on dates with attractive women who have their act together and have a good idea of what kind of guy they want, don't feel discouraged for getting cut. It's like ivy league admissions where they get tons of interest and can be very selective on who they choose. Keep trying to find a woman you enjoy…
/r/seduction27/12/25 06:36 PM
1

Fair enough. Here in LA, plenty of guys cross multiple checkpoints of that list. I'm in West LA, formerly Santa Monica and now Marina del Rey. Most guys have money. Many have status. Few have fame, etc. Simply having money in competitive markets where everyone's on a similar playing field is so much different than if you have money in rural Iowa or somewhere. Guys can obviously still do just fine without without money, status or fame. But status greatly helps offset money. Military, firefighters…
/r/seduction27/12/25 06:20 PM
7

Fame nearly always works to find someone pretty much instantly, but it may not help in generating actual chemistry and a genuine relationship. I've known a few guys who have women regularly reach out to them if they're a public figure. People with fans ultimately usually end up dating and marrying others with high status and fame.
/r/seduction27/12/25 06:05 PM
1

This is all you need to know.
/r/seduction27/12/25 05:31 AM
4

It's not. There was a PUA industry years ago that tried to make it "seem" way more complicated than it is. That's why things like Mystery Method caught on as a fad for a time. But none of that is needed and it likely hurts more guys than helps for many reasons like adopting a persona, relying on scripted routines, viewing encounters with women as a "game" and not an emotional human experience, etc.
/r/seduction26/12/25 04:27 AM
3

"Hey, let's dance" and extend your hand. Don't overthink.
/r/seduction26/12/25 03:36 AM
22

Just talk to them. Be a curious person and chit chat for a moment. If she's attractive, who cares. I'm sure you could talk to an older person without much anxiety or worry. Do the same with any other woman.
/r/seduction26/12/25 03:35 AM
2

You'd probably increase your chances by far ditching the app and walking outside your dorm to talk to women.
/r/seduction26/12/25 03:30 AM
3

You're using a lot of 2000s PUA era buzzwords. Lose that frame of mind immediately and quit thinking of women as video game avatar rankings. Someone attractive is nice, but you're really making this an object based and outcome dependent scenario. Focus on talking to women like human beings and not relying on any kind of silly system. Get to know them, see what things you like and don't like, and try to see if there's enough middle ground for the potential of a future relationship.
/r/seduction25/12/25 09:15 PM
1

Paragraph breaks are needed to read that.
/r/seduction25/12/25 09:11 PM
1

Dad bods are liked by many women as well. I've even known fat guys who did very well. Women don't only like one body type. Skinny but below average height might be worse than tall and fat as far as widespread attraction.
/r/seduction25/12/25 09:08 PM
8

You can be "serious" and still do just fine. Most guys aren't comedic wizards and don't tease women like when you were in middle school. The problem is likely confidence/self-esteem. If you interact with women in an unnatural way thinking you "have" to make her laugh and have to be xyz, then you're going to come off as nervous, potentially eccentric or fake.
/r/seduction25/12/25 06:32 PM
1

My best odds by far have been through social game and it's been my primary method of dating after my divorce. I completely eliminated online dating/apps and don't miss them. Cold approach is fine as well but you're starting from zero as a complete stranger. My current girlfriend and I have a shared friend circle and the transition into being a couple was really smooth and straightforward. The best "wing" is a female friend of hers she trusts.
/r/seduction25/12/25 08:32 AM
2

Looking 19 at age 28 is likely a stretch. When I was in college the nontrad students pushing 30 definitely did not blend in with everyone else. You could just grow a beard and put on some muscle if you haven't already. Your height will probably be more of a hurdle, but it's something you can't change and so don't worry about it. Carry confidence, believe in yourself, and focus on meeting new people. Don't worry so much on the outcomes. If you're rejected, no problem. Wish her well and talk to so…
/r/seduction24/12/25 10:30 PM
1

Inviting a woman to a hotel room is beyond creepy and sad. Don't do that. Work on yourself right now and resume dating when you have your logistics sorted and are taking care of everything else in your life such as steady income and a consistent work/life balance. These women likely assume you're either married or homeless.
/r/seduction24/12/25 09:23 PM
1

Either AI slop or a guy who had a few flings. Okay. Cool story, bro.
/r/seduction24/12/25 07:30 PM
2

Just have a fun holiday and time away from work. Don't worry about your itchy balls.
/r/seduction24/12/25 03:48 AM
1

For a doctor, you sure seek a lot of medical advice from non-medical professionals on Reddit.
/r/seduction24/12/25 02:45 AM
1

You don't with online dating. They're just a lottery of whichever woman likes your look and then makes more critical evaluations on a date. Do cold approach and talk to people in person. Ideally, make the apps your lowest priority.
/r/seduction23/12/25 07:37 PM
12

Pass.
/r/seduction23/12/25 07:36 PM
1

I don't use Hinge. But it's probably a good idea to have a great photo roll for anyone to see. Women get tons of messages on these apps and likely just check out the pictures as a starting point to decide if she'll go on a date. Show off your interests and maximize your environments to paint a picture of your lifestyle. Just don't be phony with it like sitting on a motorcycle or hanging from a rock wall if you don't do those hobbies. Keep it fun but congruent with who you are, not a fictional pe…
/r/seduction23/12/25 07:31 PM
2

It's toxic behavior. If it were a bitter breakup from her craziness, I would take the high road and be courteous to her in public and that'd be the extent of it. No outside communication or scheduled meetups, period. For an ex who is sane and we parted on good terms, I might have lunch with if asked every now and then or take messages over Facebook, Whatsapp, etc but no dating and no physicality.
/r/seduction23/12/25 06:01 PM
1

That's way too forward and potentially crossing a boundary into sexual harassment territory. Just because it's a seduction sub doesn't mean act like a 2007 PUA.
/r/seduction23/12/25 07:41 AM
2

Her interest in your photos will probably matter more than your texts. Perfect that as a priority. When I used to run mock tests several years ago, even a simple "hey" would generate interest if she likes your look/profile. Now it's just looks as profiles are heavily condensed in the smartphone era and no one reads them. I eliminated OLD and don't even miss it now. Most guys have probably already commented on her Bills clothing. You could ask something else to catch her eye. Part of the limitati…
/r/seduction23/12/25 07:34 AM
5

As someone else mentioned, you don't need push/pull. That doesn't mean turn into a pushover or in general fall into nice guy tropes. You still need to take her on regular date nights when you both have time. Falling into set routines like going to the same places and at similar times can be tricky; some like the structure and others don't. Gauge her interest. The key is in the communication. Don't be afraid to share your thoughts, ask questions, etc. Maintain your core personality, your hobbies,…
/r/seduction23/12/25 07:22 AM
7

You might want to reformat your thoughts with paragraph breaks, punctuation, etc.
/r/seduction23/12/25 07:16 AM
1

Huh? Dating being a lower priority != completely avoid. But building a lifestyle, a career and solid routines in your 20s is priceless. Dating is still obviously a great time in your 30s, maybe even moreso with money less of a factor to worry about. The other things mentioned are a much larger hurdle if not done earlier. Plus career and self diligence goes a long way towards more solid attraction. I know plenty of guys who worked like dogs in their 20s and still had time to date or even marry. I…
/r/seduction23/12/25 06:54 AM
1

More important than OP's question is to make it comfortable for you every night. Invest in a quality mattress, quality pillows and a HEPA level air purifier for the room. If it's good for you it's likely good for others. And as others said, wash the sheets and keep the room clean. Making the bed daily is a good habit for everyone to have no matter your dating status. Beyond that, you have nothing to worry about.
/r/seduction22/12/25 07:09 PM
3

There's nothing wrong with being a slow mover. I also take my time in the early stages. You just need to communicate well and demonstrate that you're enjoying the dates. If your lifestyle is in check and you don't fall into nice guy tropes, you should be fine. I don't kiss much of the time on first dates and am not in a rush for sex. Even if she's really hot I'll pass on the opportunity for sex if we're not vibing and I just don't sense any degree of a potential future. Go at your own pace. Too …
/r/seduction22/12/25 07:06 PM
0

Build your lifestyle. You're still really young. Work hard, maintain solid routines like going to bed and waking up at consistent hours, go to the gym, etc. Talk to as many people as you can and show genuine interest. Listen to what they have to say. It's not all about you. But during this time you do need to worry more about starting a career and making good decisions like how to invest/budget. Go on dates when you have time. Just don't stress over it. That's silly.
/r/seduction22/12/25 07:02 PM
2

Definitely not. In recent years I've focused more on social game and thus women from shared interest groups, mutual friends, etc. Many happen to also be attractive and that's a plus but it's not everything.
/r/seduction22/12/25 06:58 PM
2

Your post is kind of a mess, but you can change. Cut out the alcohol and know that it's not helping you, only impairing you. Literally. Also try to quit thinking of women as objects and numbers. You can use physical attraction as one qualifier, but you're sounding very one-dimensional where women are just a video game to you and you're only looking for outcomes, not genuine connections. Work on yourself, your sobriety, your social interactions and try to see women as people, not objects.
/r/seduction22/12/25 06:56 PM
1

Communicate with her and don't use lies, manipulation or deception.
/r/seduction22/12/25 06:48 PM
1

Spend less time online and more time talking to people on campus. College is by far the easiest time in your life to meet new people. Don't sulk because in reality you have it very easy.
/r/seduction22/12/25 08:21 AM
17

You're giving off peaked in college vibes and that's not good. Your 30s should be a great time for dating. By your own admission you now have steady employment and a better lifestyle than a decade or so ago. That's far better of a situation than a college kid living on ramen. You need to work on your inner game. You're not old. You're just lacking confidence. Stop worrying about whether or not you're a "heart throb" and focus on getting to know people and seeing if there's a mutual connection.
/r/seduction22/12/25 06:43 AM
1

Who cares if her parents have money? What is she doing for herself? Here in LA generational wealth folks are a dime a dozen. Is she a driven person or a trust fund kid? Vet her as you would anyone else. If she's lazy and just lives off the reputation of her family, I'd likely not do another date. But you said not snobby and that's a positive sign.
/r/seduction22/12/25 06:37 AM
1

This is why you go on a date. Do you get accepted to every job you've ever interviewed for in your life? Doubtful. She didn't sense any long term vibes as someone else mentioned. I always recommend alcohol-free dates so you're both of sound judgment the entire time and making rational decisions. Plus you were likely way too physical and gave her the impression you only want her for a fling. But it could be other reasons, too. Taking a quick look at your post history and you're a below average he…
/r/seduction22/12/25 06:23 AM
1

Say what? You can't worry about being rejected just because you live in a rural area. Do you really think rejections are miraculously different in cities? I've lived in both and the answer is no. It's all in your head.
/r/seduction21/12/25 10:16 PM
4

I only do monogamous relationships, but good luck to anyone who goes down the path of an open relationship.
/r/seduction21/12/25 07:55 PM
1

She's probably testing you out at her pace while being a bit skeptical and assuming it's more of a platonic thing. She probably doesn't think a guy in your age range would be serious for commitment or matches her life experience level. Most women do not date down to someone a few generations younger. I'm almost 35 and a guy, but 25 year old women are off my dating radar. You might have to be more direct and not just be her gym texting buddy.
/r/seduction21/12/25 07:42 PM
2

Hypertensive level saltiness there. I had multiple girlfriends and even got married in my 20s without using those and all of those social media platforms were around then. I didn't use them and still don't while doing just fine. I also haven't been to a bar or club since I was 25 other than to eat or for a work related social function. You make it sound like the odds are stacked against you when it's likely not the case at all. Your attitude and inner game is holding you back.
/r/seduction21/12/25 06:32 PM
44

It probably depends on the person. I no longer go to either for numerous reasons such as too loud to hold conversation, do not drink, and I don't want to meet women who have been drinking. The atmosphere of most clubs was kind of fun until around age 24 or so but beyond that, no thanks.
/r/seduction21/12/25 08:32 AM
0

OP, you may need to work on your inner game. People's perceptions can change at the drop of a hat. Demonstrate value and a new you. It's like the old saying "winning changes everything." Carry yourself with higher confidence, not arrogance. You don't know what she is thinking. She may not even remember as well as you think. And even if she does, no problem. Start off fresh. Leave the old you behind and if she directly references it you can lead with what you're doing now. I think plenty of peopl…
/r/seduction21/12/25 02:31 AM
1

You're coming off way too thirsty. As someone else said, talk to her and see if you have shared interests and click beyond just "you're hot." You may sour your standing with this group if it's obvious you're just trying to be a hornball and otherwise have no chemistry with the group. Show some compassion and get to know these people. Don't just use them so you can isolate someone for a fling. That's not cool.
/r/seduction21/12/25 02:25 AM
1

This might be a tough uphill climb. She's already into her career and has her own place while you're a student and live with parents. If the dynamics were flipped, I likely wouldn't date a woman in that situation.
/r/seduction21/12/25 01:40 AM
1

It's the Christmas season rush. She may have a family and other stuff to attend to right now.
/r/seduction21/12/25 01:38 AM
4

What else would they do? Mystery and Owen have no other life skills. It's not like Mystery would be a successful magician with a residency in Vegas and he's too mentally ill to work for anyone else.
/r/seduction21/12/25 01:35 AM
1

Get in a relationship and you'll have sex all the time. My ex and I probably had sex over 2000 times. But as others said, no one gives a single care. Focus on finding a good woman you connect with on more than just the physical.
/r/seduction21/12/25 01:32 AM
1

Minimally before you're a couple. I generally text conversationally only when the relationship begins. Before is to schedule dates.
/r/seduction21/12/25 01:21 AM
0

One of the most charismatic guys I ever met was like 5'5. He was at least 6" shorter than me and was by far the most "ladies man" guy of a vacation we were on, and there were multiple people over 6'0. That guy had celeb level aura even though he wasn't famous, not an influencer or pro athlete, not a musician, etc.
/r/seduction20/12/25 06:38 PM
1

Exactly this. I know plenty of guys who are over 6'0 and still insecure about height because they think they'd be happier a few inches taller. It's a pure mental health sticking point. Don't let it bother you at all.
/r/seduction20/12/25 06:35 PM
1

That would be beyond insane and a terrible idea. Even if you paid the money to get such a surgery done in the US, you'd have lifelong complications that far exceed any perceived self confidence boost from an extra few inches. Maybe if you were 5'2 or shorter. But at 5'9 you need to work on your mental health. Shallow women will reject you for height if they want. Guess what? They'd probably find something else even if you are 6'0+. I'm 5'11 barefoot and always state it to women if asked or on pr…
/r/seduction20/12/25 06:30 PM
5

It's AI.
/r/seduction20/12/25 07:01 AM
15

Unless she has BPD. Then she starts an MMA fight for real because you did something, even for a half second, to piss her off.
/r/seduction20/12/25 06:59 AM
5

This is the way. OP is learning that modern day apps are full of bots and women just seeking validation to boost their ego.
/r/seduction20/12/25 06:57 AM
0

Unless your partner knows about it and you both agree, don't.
/r/seduction20/12/25 06:55 AM
15

I was probably the opposite and gave off super flirty signs from the start in my mid 20s right before I met my ex-wife. I had moved to Santa Monica and was working two jobs out of college before I started up a business. So I'd wake up super early and be tired pretty much all day. I'd schedule unorthodox dates either for breakfast/a hike or later that night at my place. It didn't even dawn to me at the time that having a first date at my place suggested it's an excuse to have sex. I was just too …
/r/seduction19/12/25 09:08 PM
1

You can always just enjoy the festival and daygame later on at places you know everyone's going to be millennial and older. Most people into trendy new music are not going to be over 30 unless they're going with their kids. I'm 34 and couldn't tell you anyone trending right now.
/r/seduction19/12/25 08:52 PM
1

I haven't used them in years but liked regular old Match back in the day as it was women more serious for LTR and who were more career driven, aka not gold diggers or looking to be spoiled. Local friends seem to like Hinge.
/r/seduction19/12/25 08:46 PM
1

Speak the way you normally speak. The only "modification" would be speaking louder if it's in a louder place like a bar or club. But otherwise don't worry about it.
/r/seduction19/12/25 07:42 AM
1

Your question makes no sense at all.
/r/seduction19/12/25 12:16 AM
4

The best tip is not to talk to them if they're visibly and audibly showing signs of being intoxicated.
/r/seduction19/12/25 12:09 AM
1

You'll get there. It probably helps to remember the times she's been a mental wreck because that's her natural state. The other times are when she was concealing it. It might help to get your stuff with a friend in case she goes ballistic or tries to start something. Or have her meet you in public. She'll also get over it, possibly even more quickly than you. People with BPD/NPD often have someone lined up very quickly afterwards to cope. And then she'll lie and tell him she was with a really ba…
/r/seduction18/12/25 11:55 PM
1

10 months isn't a long relationship. I had longer relationships even in high school. You haven't lost your way; it's purely mental. I took an entire year off from doing any approaches or going on a single date after my divorce and used the time to work hard, regroup, get therapy, and resume hobbies. The return to dating was smooth as I was in a great state of mind. You may not be feeling as mentally assured as you think.
/r/seduction18/12/25 08:15 PM
2

People change their mind like socks. It happens. Don't take it personally or get overly critical of her reasoning. Just move on and keep talking to people.
/r/seduction18/12/25 08:13 PM
2

You aren't as cool as you think. When I'm single I'll do approaches in sandals and swim trunks and it's no big deal. OP, you're acting like a middle schooler who goes to dances and wants everyone to approach him because you think you look like a stud in the new penny loafers your mom picked out.
/r/seduction18/12/25 07:03 AM
1

You're trying to rush sex with her and it's extremely obvious. She wants to get to know you better and you should do the same. See if she's girlfriend material without using sex as the only criteria.
/r/seduction18/12/25 07:01 AM
2

Spam, scammers and bots. It's usually men behind the accounts. I know some old men who pay to text and webcam with international women who look like models. They're organized rings where the only time an actual woman is involved is when you pay a whole lot to cam with them. These guys I'm talking about are paying thousands of dollars to basically be a penpal with a guy cat fishing Americans and only occasionally he'll webcam with a woman who will never meet anyone and is just used as part of the…
/r/seduction18/12/25 03:52 AM
1

OP should've left his story up. Men need to realize you can't play around with these women.
/r/seduction18/12/25 03:49 AM
1

I'm actually amazed she acknowledged having BPD. They almost always play the victim and say they never acted in a destructive manner until meeting you. It's "you" who "made them this way." One of the first big red flags I didn't pick up with my ex-wife was when she said her previous ex gave up on her and locked himself in another room of the house every night and stopped talking to her. She made him sound like a bad guy. But everyone I talked to from her circle eventually said the same thing. Th…
/r/seduction18/12/25 03:37 AM
2

I can totally relate with flaws before even meeting up. There was a really hot woman I met during the time I still used dating apps. We had some scheduling hangups for a few weeks and kept talking until then. She was criticizing a lot of random things ahead of time and even on the day we went on a first date. She demanded that I go and get a haircut on the date because she didn't like the way it look compared to some of the pictures on the profile from a few months before. She wouldn't let up on…
/r/seduction17/12/25 09:26 PM
2

Dump without the pump. Don't even allow her into your domain. I can guarantee many guys had your mindset and ended up in a bad situation because the sex clouded their judgment to say no again and again.
/r/seduction17/12/25 09:19 PM
2

100% no. I've written about it numerous times, but I'll give you some insight. I was married to a woman like the OP describes. She is textbook BPD and thrives on toxic drama. She's still one of the hottest women I've ever seen, let alone actually dated and then married. She's the kind of woman guys simp over and will try to be her friend for years for even a chance to get laid. I was in my 20s and didn't really know what I was getting myself into. She had charisma, swagger, was very extroverted …
/r/seduction17/12/25 09:15 PM
1

I never cared for it.
/r/seduction17/12/25 01:02 PM
2

I met college aged people in person at a variety of places like the Venice Boardwalk, on the beach, around the Santa Monica Pier, etc. I don't care for bars, clubs or in general places where women are more likely to be drinking. I prefer daygame when people are alert and not as tired. These are areas with tourists as well and so you have to weed those out and make sure they're not just on vacation. But plenty of locals frequent as well. It's probably like that in every major city and the nearby …
/r/seduction17/12/25 06:23 AM
2

You don't need Instagram to talk to women and especially not at 30.
/r/seduction17/12/25 06:05 AM
4

That's about as pseudoscience as the math you see on toilet paper packaging.
/r/seduction17/12/25 06:02 AM
1

A quality woman in her 40s could be more difficult. Confident and accomplished women over forty aren't low on options and often know what they want. Some may outright pursue themselves. I'm almost 35 and generally find +/- 5 years to be a near ideal sweetspot. My current girlfriend recently had her 32nd birthday and really has her life together without partying or getting into or creating drama. I went on a decent amount of dates with 20-somethings after my divorce as I got married in my 20s and…
/r/seduction17/12/25 04:04 AM
4

Yeah, this thread was a total airball. Just bad advice, midlife crisis, who knows, but take it with a hypertensive level of salt. It'd make more sense if the OP just came out and said it's satire.
/r/seduction17/12/25 03:39 AM
22

Women have every right to be on guard and skeptical upon the first date based on some of the levels of calculated crazy some of these threads can be.
/r/seduction16/12/25 10:50 PM
1

Source: trust me, bro. I'm only a few months or so younger than OP and if anyone said "I was really excited to have huge tits bouncing in my face" I'd assume it was an 18 year old porn addicted incel. OP is likely trolling and I'll give him that; it worked to get a few replies.
/r/seduction16/12/25 07:08 PM
2

Definitely don't create artificial drama or be disingenuous in any way.
/r/seduction16/12/25 07:02 PM
1

Divorce probably actually helped a lot. I took a year off from any dating afterwards to regroup, reflect, get therapy, go to the gym, etc. My ex-wife really made me realize that sex and a nice body aren't the priority in a good relationship. It's cool, but you have to have a strong foundation of mutual respect, trust and where both people encourage each other and value each other's pursuits, independence, etc.
/r/seduction16/12/25 06:20 AM
1

Any place can be fine if you put yourself out there. I'm in the greater LA area of Marina del Rey. I rarely even go into the city proper of Los Angeles and don't hang out or party in places like DTLA, Hollywood/WeHo, etc. I mainly look for women here closer to the beach and my current girlfriend neither lives in the city nor parties there as well.
/r/seduction16/12/25 06:15 AM
4

Sex definitely isn't the prize it was in my 20s, either.
/r/seduction16/12/25 06:11 AM
2

It depends what you mean by "game." My goal is always with a future in mind, so a girlfriend and potentially a wife. And I say that as someone who's been married once starting in my 20s. I'd like to get married again and am doing more checkpoints this time to evaluate and reflect. I'm not getting caught up in "the sex is good" as a priority marker; there has to be more going on than the physical. But dating in general compared to 20s, I'm not sure if I'd say it is more difficult to get dates ove…
/r/seduction16/12/25 06:06 AM
4

Do you not find anyone else interesting? Treat each approach as an opportunity to meet a new person. If you don't end up going on a date, so what. Don't think of this as a win or a loss. Dating is not boxing or a video game. Any time you're putting yourself out there and being social is a win.
/r/seduction15/12/25 06:38 PM
1

I haven't done one night stands since my early 20s in college and have no desire to revisit that lifestyle. But it would probably simply be a study session that turned to fooling around to ease the anxiety of a midterm/final the next day.
/r/seduction15/12/25 06:12 PM
1

Don't just bounce around random topics hoping they'll stick. Get to know her story and her interests. You're wanting to use this time to see if she would be a good candidate for dating. While it's not an nterview it kind of is; you just have to be more playful with the framing so both of you are more relaxed.
/r/seduction15/12/25 06:08 PM
1

Go to a church or place of worship for the fellowship and community, not to find a sexual partner.
/r/seduction15/12/25 06:04 PM
5

It does come off as humblebragging aging player. I had to eyeroll at his descriptions of the woman.
/r/seduction15/12/25 05:59 PM
2

You're still a stranger. Not everyone is going to want to kiss on the very first date and not everyone's high energy around people they don't know well. I rarely kiss on first dates and the difference between getting a second date versus a rejection was pretty negligible. My current girlfriend I did not kiss on date one and we went on multiple dates before having sex, certainly more than three. Don't force anything just because you think it's a formula you need to do in order to get another date…
/r/seduction15/12/25 03:13 AM
4

It's not a fumble. From the sounds of it, it was likely drunk women trying to make an ex jealous or out of spite by taking a picture with a "new guy."
/r/seduction15/12/25 03:08 AM
1

Object and a maid is what it sounds like. "Hey, come over, cook for me, clean, and we'll have sex. But don't be so nosey afterwards and text me when I'm not in the mood." OP does not sound like a good boyfriend for anyone in his current state. But he's presumably also young and can change his demeanor.
/r/seduction15/12/25 03:03 AM
1

Make her your girlfriend and you'll hook up all the time. That's assuming you do want a relationship for more than sex.
/r/seduction14/12/25 10:43 PM
0

You don't have to date anyone you don't communicate well with. If you're doing all the talking, that's going to be a very tiring and one sided relationship.
/r/seduction14/12/25 08:59 PM
1

Introduce yourself and tell her you're going to give her a call. Texting often hurts more than helps earlier on because strangers don't know each other's style and things get misinterpreted over text. In my experiences, flaking is greatly reduced when introduced over the phone or FaceTime. Once you're a couple it's easier to text beyond setting up dates because you're comfortable and more familiar with each of your personalities.
/r/seduction14/12/25 08:55 PM
2

OP is in a low effort casual relationship of convenience as he admitted himself and now is suddenly worried about his status with her. You've already missed that boat by not making it a more exclusive and traditional relationship. Just because you text her a bit and meet up with her when you want to get laid doesn't change much. It still sounds more fwb than you probably realize. Sending her a condescending text doesn't help. You brought negative vibes towards a woman who isn't even your committ…
/r/seduction14/12/25 08:50 PM
3

No. This question shows very poor social awareness. The most likely scenario is you would not get laid and you'd also be terminated for your unprofessionalism. That kind of behavior could spread within your industry as well. Some are pretty well networked and these kinds of things don't go unnoticed.
/r/seduction14/12/25 08:35 PM
3

I know a lot of millionaires but it's probably not a big deal since this is LA and your house alone is worth over 1m. In my 30s and none that I know of, among the wealthiest at least, have gone for 20-21 year olds. And my old house in Santa Monica was right next to a community college in walking distance.
/r/seduction13/12/25 11:28 PM
5

Cold approach often takes some patience. You're both total strangers and have to build rapport from zero. If it were social game where you two already had some shared commonalities like the same friend circle or you're part of a shared interest group, then your odds would probably skyrocket with each person.
/r/seduction13/12/25 10:13 PM
1

Many first dates do not result in a second date. Don't let it rattle you if that's the case here. Just know that the other person does not always view the date with the same enthusiasm you may have had even if it looked like she was having a good time. She could have been polite and carried on with the date when she wasn't sensing a connection and it's also possible she really does have something else going on. Only she knows. You can just simply say you had a fun time and liked her energy, then…
/r/seduction13/12/25 10:08 PM
5

It predictably wasn't very good due to nerves and inexperience. This usually applies to each new partner as well. With every girlfriend I've had, including an ex-wife, the sex greatly improved after multiple sessions and a more developed emotional connection. You can really fine tune over time and through getting to really know and communicate with your partner.
/r/seduction13/12/25 09:54 PM
124

She sounds pretty salty if she's telling you she has tons of guys to choose from even if it's true. People cheat regardless of socioeconomic status and it sucks for everyone. Obviously don't do it and promptly leave anyone who cheats on you after you're both exclusive.
/r/seduction13/12/25 05:35 PM
1

Massive age difference. They're 18-21 year olds and you guys are into your 40s. They simply are not interested.
/r/seduction13/12/25 04:35 PM
2

You can always expand your reach and try different locations and different days, etc, if you prefer speaking more in isolation without going through the hoops of a group. Not everyone's as comfortable with roundtable type convos and especially in a loud club or bar setting. Evenings on a weekend and you may not find as many women who aren't traveling in groups with their closest friends. That's pretty normal and typical. You may have better luck with daygame or cold approach in non-entertainment…
/r/seduction13/12/25 04:25 PM
1

Your medication.must be wearing off as you're clearly rather unhinged.
/r/seduction13/12/25 04:17 PM
1

Says the actual creep trying to fulfill an Anime maladaptive daydream fantasy that will never happen. Still high on ketamine?
/r/seduction13/12/25 04:02 PM
4

If they're gay, let them be gay and stay in your lane. They face enough discrimination as-is. I'm in SoCal where there are a lot of LGBTQ+. They obviously don't like straight guys being aggressive with trying to "turn them straight."
/r/seduction13/12/25 03:50 PM
1

Let's break it down. You mentioned nothing of a free flight but you did clearly state you don't speak Japanese but yet you still want to get to know Japanese women. Further, you're trying to talk to them on Bumble when you aren't even in that country and they aren't speaking to you, a guy who lives in America and does not speak their language. And your post history shows a lot of talk of Anime, being a "passport bro," maladaptive daydreaming, among other things that are found within about five s…
/r/seduction13/12/25 03:44 PM
3

Literally no one else is going to care. You can just as easily have one partner and have sex thousands of times. My ex-wife and I probably did it like 2500 times. But it's not some kind of thing you can put on your resume to improve your financial or dating life. It's one of those things that doesn't matter to anyone else.
/r/seduction13/12/25 03:36 PM
0

You'll be a tourist. Enjoy the scenery, the history and the culture. As expensive as it is to travel abroad, there's no need to waste vacation time worrying about trying to chase a fling. You can always find a woman back home. You need to be honest with yourself here. By your own admission, you don't speak Japanese. But you want to "get to know" them. That's going to be extremely tough if they don't speak any English. It sounds like you could just be fetish/kink chasing and if so, you may want t…
/r/seduction13/12/25 03:09 PM
1

Meet new people and try to be genuinely interested in what they have to say. Learn their story. Engage with them and try to connect. Don't be desperate; try to be natural about the progression and if something comes of it, great. Just don't place unnecessary pressure on yourself.
/r/seduction13/12/25 03:03 PM
-39

Indeed. Guy doesn't realize he sounds tone deaf, crazy and controlling. Instead, he's projecting his insecurities as "I'm confident and know what I want, so she can't do xyz under my watch."
/r/seduction13/12/25 10:35 AM
2

Use this time to your advantage by working as hard as you can if you're done with schooling. Even consider working a second job. Maybe even part time on weekends as well. My neighbor was bragging that his kid is working three jobs and already clearing six figures in his early 20s. Grind, grind, grind. If you're not paying your parents any rent, live as modestly as you can right now and save the majority of all the money you're earning. Look into investing if you don't already. Now's not the time…
/r/seduction13/12/25 10:16 AM
1

No one cares.
/r/seduction13/12/25 10:08 AM
14

Beyond idiotic PUA sensationalism. The obvious answer is the correct one: no. Don't do that. That was back when "gurus" tried to instruct guys on getting her into bed any way you can, no matter if unethical, a lie, or even illegal.
/r/seduction12/12/25 07:52 PM
2

Don't worry about turning her off or "killing attraction." Guys on this sub act deathly afraid of losing a woman's interest by showing commitment. Having a talk of exclusion after multiple dates and some time together is a perfectly natural and normal way to show her you have at least some vision of a relationship with her, more than just good times and going on dates or getting physical. You're not asking her to marry you or tying her or yourself down. It's simply being more clear on where you …
/r/seduction12/12/25 05:06 PM
1

Talk to more people with regularity in your daily life. It doesn't matter if they're male or female, 25 or 85. The important thing is to get in the habit of enjoying communicating and bonding with others. Have a natural curiosity and enjoy learning about others and their interests, their experiences, etc. Be a good listener. Don't use that time to tune them out and try to think of some clever conversational strategy. No, you value what they have to say, use it towards knowing more about them and…
/r/seduction12/12/25 04:50 PM
4

There's no planning. You're approaching total strangers. She either will want to give you a number and go out with you or she won't. In many cases she will not and you just have to accept it. An underrated and less talked about way of really upping your chances is through social game. If you join shared interest groups, you'll meet a lot of new people. Probably over half of my previous girlfriends have been through volleyball and climbing groups. My current girlfriend was met through a mutual fe…
/r/seduction12/12/25 04:38 PM
1

Simple Pickup was staged prank type videos back when pranks were a big fad online. They just had a PUA crossover spin to the channel where they would do very cringe-y pick-ups and found a way to monetize the PUA audience separate from just the guys who found their videos goofy. They were no better with women than their viewers and there was even a falling out with the guys involving infidelity and a love triangle with one guy's wife.
/r/seduction12/12/25 09:22 AM
2

Guys on this sub seem deathly afraid of "killing attraction." Relax. There's absolutely nothing wrong with progressing the relationship and if anything, you're displaying direction, leadership and at least somewhat of a vision. It's not needy after two months of talking, going on dates and so forth. You're not asking her to marry you. You're simply taking the next step from casual dating to more of a traditional relationship where it's expected that you two are going to focus on each other as a …
/r/seduction12/12/25 08:44 AM
2

If you feel like you walk on eggshells all the time and can't be yourself, you really need to consider moving on. Arguments in relationships are totally healthy and normal. But if someone is giving you bad anxiety and depression along with constantly putting you down and threatening to leave, those are multiple major red flags. I ignored the same ones for years and regret it. She might even be making you ill from the constant stress. Looks and sex don't matter a single bit if your partner keeps …
/r/seduction12/12/25 06:31 AM
2

It adds legitimacy to your relationship, along with many securities and perks. It's more than just a piece of paper. And it's certainly different on a societal level. I liked carrying the identity of husband when things were working. It's not always the easiest to explain to people who have never been there. It's not a magical new universe or anything, but it is different than just cohabitating. If you're worried about divorce complications from a legal standpoint, definitely make sure you both …
/r/seduction12/12/25 03:39 AM
2

You must not be very sure then.
/r/seduction12/12/25 03:31 AM
2

My ex-wife has bad uncontrolled BPD. It really wore me down over time as she progressively got worse and unhinged, fully casting blame on me instead of volunteering to seek treatment. I told her I'd pay all the health care bills and she still refused while raging and showing every textbook trait of the illness. I was so exhausted after the divorce that I took a full year from going on any dates and used the time for therapy, regrouping, gym, etc. And then I started going on dates again when I wa…
/r/seduction12/12/25 02:36 AM
5

No. But I spend much more time vetting potential girlfriends now. My ex-wife is mentally ill with BPD and I naively ignored strong red flags because she was extremely hot, outgoing and charismatic. But you have to find multiple compatibility points that don't involve looks or intimacy. It needs to be someone who can compromise, problem solve and in general be a pleasant person to spend time, grow and learn. I took a year off from any dating after my divorce and it tremendously helped to rebuild …
/r/seduction12/12/25 12:31 AM
1

Be honest of your intentions and shoot your shot. It was extremely easy when I was in college, though I have moved on from hook-ups since I was like 21-22. You don't have to be a goof and say "I only want to have sex with you" but make it clear that you aren't seeking a relationship. Don't lead anyone on.
/r/seduction12/12/25 12:18 AM
1

Or be confident in who you are and tell her your age. There's no thinking to such a simple question. It's not a carnival game.
/r/seduction11/12/25 07:32 AM
1

Or that he's purposefully being an evasive clown. Not being able to answer a simple qualifier like your age is a red flag no matter what shady PUAs in the past tried to drum up.
/r/seduction11/12/25 07:28 AM
2

I'm in my 30s and would instantly reject a 19 year old even if she approached me first. She didn't want the age gap. Many don't. Some might. You just have to respect others' wishes and not turn it into a game just because you don't like the outcome of her reply.
/r/seduction11/12/25 07:23 AM
2

Be careful with it. If you're caught it's jail plus RSO status in many places.
/r/seduction11/12/25 07:21 AM
4

That advice is untrue and beyond idiotic.
/r/seduction11/12/25 07:20 AM
1

True compatibility is tough to find. You have to seek middle ground and have mutual respect for each other to accept differences and learn ways to compromise so you're both happy and being heard. One thing that's great is continuously learning from a partner and being a good active listener. Respect and trust are way more important than how hot you find her. The happiest I've ever been with a partner is when we can easily resolve conflicts without getting rattled and just genuinely enjoying spen…
/r/seduction11/12/25 07:08 AM
2

Those also sound very BPD-like and I experienced the same. They have abandonment fears which would explain her demanding you stop everything you're doing to get her. Damsel in distress is another common theme where they'll play the victim and go absolutely ballistic and then want you to rescue them so they feel loved/wanted. Their state of mind processes people as all good or all bad with no in between and a further problem is they cycle between these frequently. You going without her = you're a…
/r/seduction11/12/25 05:51 AM
2

Those are definitely very common traits with BPD. Random and frequent blow ups over nothing were probably one of the more defining characteristics. A random example of thousands was eating in her car during a heavy rainstorm when we were out of state and I accidentally dropped food onto the floorboard. She locked me out of the car, said she'd call the police if I got back in, and drove right off. So I walked through an unfamiliar area during a storm and had to wait a few hours for her to cool do…
/r/seduction11/12/25 03:42 AM
1

You'll build experience through rejections. It may also help with conflict resolution. Don't take them personally and wish each woman well afterwards. Take the high road and move on without sulking about it.
/r/seduction10/12/25 03:34 AM
3

Being established and career/goal oriented certainly helps. I look for the same in women, not money per se but her own career in something she's passionate about. As a business owner myself I certainly relate to other entrepreneurs and professionals. Probably just as tough with dealing with young college women was their fellow college friends. Once you amplify the circle it really starts to quickly grate. I remember hanging out with a woman and several of her college friends and I felt like her …
/r/seduction10/12/25 03:27 AM
1

Grab her number when you see her again. You may even be able to do a date that same day if you're both tired and hungry and there's a place to eat nearby. Just note that as you mentioned there is a large lifestyle gap with you being a career oriented person and she's still a college kid with minimal life experience other than going to classes. After my divorce at 32 I went on dates with multiple college women and ultimately found them too immature and inexperienced to pursue a relationship.
/r/seduction09/12/25 10:21 PM
1

It's not the worst message ever, but I wouldn't say anything that could be misinterpreted as insulting even if you try to add your own laugh track to the message. It's often best to just call her to setup the date. You may have to of course text her beforehand and tell her you're going to call since younger generations are terrified of picking up the phone. Keep it brief with no deep conversation or anything negative; the main purpose is light banter and setup the date. It's easier to negotiate …
/r/seduction09/12/25 10:13 PM
1

That kind of over the top banter is not sustainable. I'd say drop it immediately and focus on getting to know her without the sarcastic comedy gimmickry.
/r/seduction09/12/25 10:04 PM
7

Screen for potential mental health disorders. It's not clinically diagnostic but ask about her family and her upbringing, what kind of relationship she has with them and her experiences. Also pay attention to how she talks about others and treats you and others in general on dates.
/r/seduction09/12/25 06:22 AM
18

Yeah, many guys have BPD as well and it's both under diagnosed or outright incorrectly assumed to be ASPD at times. It's definitely something to familiarize with regardless of gender. Even a friend with BPD could be a nightmare to deal with as you'll be cast as a bad guy any time that person thinks you're betraying them.
/r/seduction09/12/25 06:15 AM
1

To OP it comes off as blunt and genuine. To anyone else it comes off as creepy and lacking social awareness. That was basically just catcalling her while seated next to her. Terrible move as an opening line.
/r/seduction09/12/25 06:06 AM
1

If she's that relaxed about going on dates with you while having a boyfriend, don't cry to the sub when she breaks your heart and does it to you.
/r/seduction09/12/25 06:00 AM
2

Shut this compartment of your brain off and don't think about these things when having conversations with people. Live in the moment. Listen. And respond out of curiosity and interest. Don't try to overly calculate or script anything out.
/r/seduction09/12/25 05:56 AM
2

That's a fair summary and I know people who have successfully used each method. My current favorite is social circle and it's how I met my current girlfriend. I eliminated online dating and don't have fame. But to better answer OP, I'd say only join activities out of genuine interest and not as a novelty gimmick to find a date. Many shared interest groups will have eligible women. I dated multiple women over the years through volleyball and climbing groups. Look around and try to find meetup gro…
/r/seduction09/12/25 05:50 AM
63

It's probably AI copy and paste. But those behaviors are very common with cluster B disorders like BPD and NPD. My ex-wife is textbook BPD and absolutely wore me down to the point that I'm still pretty tired two years later. She exhibited all of those traits.
/r/seduction09/12/25 05:44 AM
1

Ignore this. Don't coerce anyone into sex by pressuring them to be intoxicated or high.
/r/seduction09/12/25 05:39 AM
3

It's usually pretty easy because in shared interest groups you often see regulars frequently and you're pretty comfortable with each other. There were some people who I casually talked to for months or so before we started dating. Just one day I'd bring up that we should xyz and then it started from there. You can often even set up a date that day. After you've played volleyball or climbed, for example, most are pretty hungry and want a bite to eat. Because you are more comfortable with each oth…
/r/seduction08/12/25 05:12 PM
2

She was just being friendly and thought it was cute that a little baby in her eyes approached her. There's a massive life experience gap between 20 and the 30s. Even as a 34 year old guy, I would not consider dating a 20 year old even if she approached first.
/r/seduction07/12/25 08:07 PM
1

Be your best self, be a good active listener and don't lie, manipulate or deceive. Project and conduct yourself as you are and not in a calculated manner that you think would be fine tuned for that person. Maintain your core goals, beliefs and integrity and don't be afraid to disagree as you can always seek middle ground. Believe in yourself that you can do it. You can display confidence without being arrogant.
/r/seduction07/12/25 08:03 PM
2

Shared interest groups can really help. About half my girlfriends were through volleyball and climbing groups. I'm genuinely interested in both as a hobbyist and don't use them to meet women, though I have met women that way and it's easy to transition into dating if you do.
/r/seduction07/12/25 08:01 PM
9

They've probably been drinking. It's one of the reasons I don't care for clubs. People make irrational decisions under the influence.
/r/seduction07/12/25 07:59 PM
2

Just ask. If she rejects you, wish her well and move on. There's nothing more to it.
/r/seduction07/12/25 07:57 PM
1

Some couples can make that work, others cannot. I personally would prefer dual monogamy but whatever floats your boat and good luck.
/r/seduction07/12/25 07:55 PM
5

I completely eliminated online dating and focused on a combination of cold approach and social game. Rejections don't bother me. Social game turned out to be far more successful. Nearly everyone I've been introduced to by a closer female friend has resulted in dating and relationships. It probably helps that we share mutual friends and often similar hobbies, so there's already some built-in interest and some level of trust. I met my ex-wife through online dating and probably could've had some cr…
/r/seduction07/12/25 07:47 PM
1

Purely mental. Many people your age are struggling in areas well beyond dating like poverty and so forth. College is way more expensive than it was when I graduated almost fourteen years ago. Worry about investing, building a career, networking, establish good routines and so forth. Your dating life just isn't that important right now. In your hierarchy of needs, it should be close to the bottom compared to good, shelter, work health and everything else.
/r/seduction07/12/25 04:54 PM
3

Develop your best self. Don't copy anyone else's persona. That kind of cult mentality was popular during the pua era when tons of guys dressed and talked like Mystery, Tyler Durden of Fight Club among other fictional characters. But it was wrong then and it's still wrong now.
/r/seduction06/12/25 11:45 PM
1

That doesn't mean you have to follow them. I also stopped casual relationships around 21-22 and haven't had a one night stand or fwb since then. But you obviously can carve your own path.
/r/seduction06/12/25 11:41 PM
1

Running out of time at 21? That is very delusional thinking.
/r/seduction06/12/25 06:24 PM
1

Many of them are faked/scripted for content farming and to disingenuously brand build the person pretending to be a ladies man.
/r/seduction06/12/25 06:23 PM
1

Realize she farts and takes dumps each day just like you.
/r/seduction06/12/25 06:22 PM
1

Plenty of men do, yes. Just look at all the guys on this sub who talk about wanting to get with influencers and IG women with large followings. Guys like competition. Does it matter to everyone? Of course not. I don't care about online popularity, but I do value a woman who has a strong drive in her career, has friend groups outside the relationship, etc. I couldn't date a woman who is voluntarily unemployed or doesn't have hobbies.
/r/seduction06/12/25 06:19 PM
1

No, it's called picking your battles and not creating unnecessary conflict with a guy who's probably drunk, high, on the verge, or mentally unstable. It's best to just move on and not let them ruin your night.
/r/seduction06/12/25 06:15 PM
1

Turning your back on someone like that right next to you could be risky. You don't want to do that with anyone who may try to sucker punch, etc. Assume these guys could be drunk, on the verge or mentally unstable.
/r/seduction06/12/25 06:12 PM
1

Any woman who has BPD. Their sexual appetite will likely be much higher than yours. But I wouldn't recommend this. They're extremely crazy and will likely stalk you as they get attached. They're very unstable, unhinged and you'll feel unsafe around them.
/r/seduction06/12/25 06:07 PM
3

None.
/r/seduction06/12/25 06:05 PM
1

It was usually a waste of time as far as actually finding a girlfriend. But it was fine in the sense of practicing. My current girlfriend I found through a mutual female friend and most of my previous girlfriends were through local volleyball and climbing groups. My ex-wife was through OLD and I no longer use it. People overlook social game. It's worked the best for me, at least.
/r/seduction06/12/25 06:01 PM
6

The best reaction is not caring. You don't have to engage and even if you do, something as simple as "thanks" would probably throw them off and make them look like a tool. If it's in a bar, club or any kind of party type atmosphere assume they're probably drunk or on the verge.
/r/seduction06/12/25 09:27 AM
8

Japan's probably among one of the last places I'd want to be even without considering dating. Are you even able to make a comfortable living there as an expat? Perhaps you could hang in areas with other Americans or Europeans who speak English and are more congruent with the social norms you're more familiar with encountering.
/r/seduction06/12/25 05:32 AM
1

I don't even venture into the city proper much at all and don't attend parties in the party zones. Nearly everyone I've ever dated has lived in and found in the outer boroughs.
/r/seduction06/12/25 03:31 AM
2

What are you guys going to do if you go to a city you perceive to be a dating mecca and then have no luck? Whine about that as well? The answer is, make the most of wherever you currently live whether it's a major city or a rural area. Don't move somewhere simply with the thought of expanding your dating range. Having more women to choose from won't magically solve your problems like lacking social skills or not being a personable individual. I'm in the greater LA area of Marina del Rey, formerl…
/r/seduction06/12/25 03:19 AM
1

Most women in their 30s are not going to enter a relationship with a guy a couple generations younger. That's like two whole college cycles. Even as a guy, when I got divorced at 32 the 24 year olds I was talking to were too immature and not women I requested a second date. Plenty of people change their minds before meeting or even after dates. Don't worry about it.
/r/seduction05/12/25 03:10 AM
1

If you're in college, just venture outside. That's by far the easiest time in your entire life to meet new people and date. You already have shared commonalities with so many people simply by going to the same school, taking the same classes, similar or same major, being in the same age range, etc. Online is probably better if you live in a rural farming type town and need to expand your outreach up to 30 miles or so. But in college you don't need to do that. Thousands of women are walking aroun…
/r/seduction05/12/25 03:03 AM
3

I'd say it's fine once you're in a relationship and comfortable with one another. But before then texting is probably best on occasion. Even setting up dates in the early stages I prefer phone calls. Texting is just too dry and impersonal of a medium. Women can also easily take texts out of context.
/r/seduction05/12/25 03:00 AM
16

I personally wouldn't waste a second of time on it.
/r/seduction05/12/25 02:58 AM
1

Almost 35 and butterflies, who knows. I rarely get that nervous anymore.
/r/seduction05/12/25 02:57 AM
1

I got divorced at 32, took a year off to regroup and then started fresh again at 33. I went on a lot of dates in that almost year and a half before I met my current girlfriend through a female friend. I actually deleted the apps and it was for the better. Also no Instagram. If you aren't ready to date it would still be advisable to talk to women in person as much as you can. Apps and texting are still a pretty hyper modern way of daily communication for most people. You don't want to condition y…
/r/seduction03/12/25 09:19 PM
1

It could be a number of things. If I had to guess I'd say she recently got out of a relationship and is still torn on dating someone new or trying to work it out with the ex. You can always ask her to elaborate.
/r/seduction03/12/25 09:12 PM
2

Don't worry about it. You're overthinking something that likely doesn't even matter. If it's your natural way of speaking then stick to it. Some of the old PUA instructors used to suggest trying things like deepening your voice or changing the delivery in ways outside of your normal way of speaking. Don't do that unless you're an actor playing a role for a movie .
/r/seduction03/12/25 09:10 PM
1

David DeAngelo/Eben appears to be the only reasonably sane individual of the three out of character. He's clearly a seasoned marketer and used his business sav for guys online, an avenue that wasn't quite as explored during his day. He's still married to the same wife the PUA community trashed him for marrying based on her looks and from what I've seen appears to be successful in later ventures outside of the dating realm. His old system is still somewhat dated and chauvinistic. None of them sho…
/r/seduction03/12/25 10:11 AM
1

Those questions are fine. But ask questions that you genuinely are curious about in order to get to know her better. If you just brainstorm questions to fill time then you're trying way too hard. Listen to what she's talking about and follow it up with anything that both grabs your interest or allows her to elaborate on something you aren't as clear on.
/r/seduction03/12/25 10:02 AM
6

You're 25. Talk to women in person, not over social media.
/r/seduction03/12/25 07:40 AM
1

It depends. Plans can change and no one's completely obligated to drop everything in their life for a stranger. If she reaches out and apologizes with a request for a reschedule, fine. Perhaps plan the date somewhere in the cavity of where you would be going anyway in case she does flake again. But if she does flake twice in a row it's probably best to move on in most circumstances.
/r/seduction01/12/25 12:47 AM
1

Pickup books, not worth the time if you're speaking in terms of instructional value. They're mostly worthless in that regard. But they can be entertaining.
/r/seduction01/12/25 12:44 AM
3

Many do realize that sex is much more enjoyable when there's an emotional connection. I don't care for hook-ups/one night stands either. Try to focus on finding a woman you really enjoy, share common ground and where there's mutual respect.
/r/seduction01/12/25 12:41 AM
2

Quit spending so much time online and talk to people in person. Talk more on the phone as well instead of texting. It doesn't matter if they're 21 or 100, male or female. Talk to as many people as you can. Also realize many people do not even have an internal monologue like you describe, my ex-wife being an example.
/r/seduction01/12/25 12:37 AM
2

The really smooth ones own and pilot their own aircraft and fly out to her and pick her up himself. But you'd have to be pretty wealthy. Guys that rich can easily find a local woman.
/r/seduction01/12/25 12:33 AM
13

You can delete Instagram at no cost.
/r/seduction30/11/25 05:47 AM
2

Zero.
/r/seduction29/11/25 08:56 AM
1

It can reveal a lot about people. Women with BPD will often claim to be abused by every ex when they were the ones doing the abusing. My ex-wife was like that. Very early on she mentioned that her ex stopped having sex with her and locked himself in his room in another bedroom of the house every night and I found it strange but just shrugged it off because she was really hot. Into our relationship even early on she would do things like playfully push in an aggressive way that I also thought was …
/r/seduction28/11/25 04:37 PM
0

Best way to get laid easily? Get yourself a girlfriend.
/r/seduction28/11/25 04:24 PM
1

That's crossing the line from asshole to sexual assault. You're giving terrible device even if it is likely trolling.
/r/seduction28/11/25 06:52 AM
1

That'd be losing a friend and losing any chances of ever dating her. Plus it may sour your reputation with mutual friends when she tells them about your embarrassing "unfiltered" comments. You may lose those friends as well.
/r/seduction28/11/25 06:50 AM
1

Deleting it.
/r/seduction27/11/25 10:54 PM
2

Volleyball and climbing have been my consistent hobbies for around fifteen years now. I'm fairly high level on an amateur level for both as I have put thousands of hours into both.
/r/seduction27/11/25 10:26 PM
3

Quit worrying about numbers and focus on a quality woman. You probably have nothing in common with these women.
/r/seduction27/11/25 10:24 PM
1

I'm 5'11 barefoot with no shoes. Most women I've dated have probably been in the 5'8 to 6'0 range. I've played competitive amateur volleyball for almost fifteen years and it's one of my main communities along with climbing. I'm usually one of the shorter guys with volleyball while the women are often pretty close to me in height. I wouldn't say they are any easier to date as I've had my share of rejections as well.
/r/seduction27/11/25 04:44 PM
1

They're grifters as others mentioned. Most of their audience are likely equally as good or even better at obtaining dates and finding a girlfriend compared to the coaches.
/r/seduction26/11/25 09:19 PM
0

If you want casual, state that upfront. Tell any prospect you are looking for a fling only. It'll condense the pool of women but honesty is the best policy for both parties.
/r/seduction26/11/25 10:28 AM
12

Logistics are rarely there. People tend to travel with their partner or family, or a few friends. And ship cabins are extremely tiny and cramped unless you spring for a top of the line room or are the director and get the accompanying large suite. Also, there are cameras pretty much everywhere except in your room and all bathrooms. People rarely travel alone on them unless they're middle aged or older and even then you won't run into many on the average ship. Most singles looking to hook up woul…
/r/seduction25/11/25 07:55 AM
3

If you're like 18-24, then probably few will care if you're living with parents to save money while a broke student. But beyond that is starting to push it. Once you're finished with all schooling, you really need to put all your focus on your career and building an independent lifestyle of your own. You could even work two jobs those years while you have the time and energy.
/r/seduction25/11/25 07:51 AM
1

It's going to be an obviously smaller pool of women who will date over a decade younger, but they're out there. Be your authentic self and be honest about what you want.
/r/seduction25/11/25 07:45 AM
8

No, but I also don't push for sex on a first date.
/r/seduction22/11/25 08:48 PM
8

Never lie or alter your personality to be more in line with what you think her ideal guy is like.
/r/seduction22/11/25 08:46 PM
1

Women who have their act together, emotionally and financially. They're invested in their career and love what they do. They have a solid friend group outside of relationships, etc. I'm not all that tall at 5'11 but tend to date women in the 5'9 to even 6'0 range. And at almost 35 I prefer late 20s to mid 30s. Someone mentioned "alt" types and that may be among the type I'd go out of my way to avoid as the mental health prevalence of disorders like BPD is really, really high. Anyone with cutting…
/r/seduction22/11/25 07:57 PM
2

Talk to them and find common ground beyond looks. They're regular people who fart and take dumps just like you.
/r/seduction22/11/25 07:54 PM
2

It's best to never ask. A decent few of the women I've dated, I know their exes as we're in the same communities (volleyball, rock climbing). I wouldn't personally date a best friend's ex or his sister, etc. But otherwise people run into these scenarios often. Coworkers often date each other and the more attractive women may run through the roster of guys in the office. Even if it's a random person, yeah, don't ever inquire and leave it be with a focus only on the present.
/r/seduction16/11/25 08:46 PM
2

I don't do this. At least not if we both have shared chemistry. If she reaches out first with "the feels," great.
/r/seduction16/11/25 08:43 PM
4

Women love those types of accents in LA. But it would have to be authentic. Anyone can put on a cowboy hat. If it's your natural voice, then use it.
/r/seduction16/11/25 08:10 PM
2

Anything you want within reason. I'd say hold off on topics like politics, marriage and views on starting a family that early. But they're all topics you will need to address once you become a serious couple. The same goes for religion. Most couples align politically and spiritually. On a first date, though, do a lot of listening and find her interests. See how they match up with your own and try to find common ground. Don't hog the conversation by talking endlessly about yourself but don't be c…
/r/seduction16/11/25 07:59 PM
1

I've often dated through social circle as well. About half my girlfriends were through volleyball and rock climbing. My current girlfriend was met through a mutual friend. You can certainly date random people as well. There will be more hoops and boundaries since there's less built in trust and comfort compared to people you already at least semi know or have shared friend groups.
/r/seduction16/11/25 07:57 PM
2

Yeah, don't do it.
/r/seduction16/11/25 07:53 PM
1

You're free to talk about anything. That's the whole point of getting to know someone. Learn to be a better listener. Key in on topics that she finds interesting. People enjoy talking about themselves and their interests. Don't be afraid to ask her questions you're curious to know about her. About the only thing you want to avoid is to go on long monologues about yourself or controversial topics early on like politics and religion unless you know ahead of time they're passionate topics to her.
/r/seduction14/11/25 03:39 AM
1

Speak for yourself. I could live alone in the party areas of LA like Hollywood or DTLA, etc but don't want to live there. But I enjoy the quieter serenity of Marina del Rey. I lived in Santa Monica for years but sold my place down the road for more square footage and an extra bedroom. It's over a half hour drive to the livelier hotspots, but the tradeoff is worth it. I like being closer to the beach and in general cooler temperature areas of the county. It's so nice being around 15 degrees coole…
/r/seduction12/11/25 03:25 AM
13

Just because you aren't married doesn't mean you should cheat. If you want to be poly, then bring it up with your girlfriend first. No ring isn't a green light for multiple flings.
/r/seduction12/11/25 03:21 AM
9

Talk to them and find common ground.
/r/seduction12/11/25 03:19 AM
14

Pay no attention to others. None of them will remember you a few minutes later. How often do you remember or think about others in your periphery during your day to day life? Probably never. Same with them.
/r/seduction11/11/25 09:22 PM
2

If paying attention to a woman's past, the red flags would be if she mentions having a very bitter relationship with parents/family or any previous abuse. These are often red flags for mental health disorders like BPD. Self cutting scars are a giveaway to avoid. Overly tatted in visible skin areas is often another. Obviously there are exceptions but those are things I pay attention to early on.
/r/seduction11/11/25 07:07 PM
1

You're looking like every other thirsty fan on her page, same town or not. If you don't already know her, it still creeps most people out to get cold messages over the internet.
/r/seduction11/11/25 07:03 PM
1

By your own admission her English was poor. She was probably just trying to be friendly and non-confrontational.
/r/seduction11/11/25 07:00 PM
1

Agree with the one bad text. It's a permanent record in her phone. You can't salvage it as easily compared to if you slipped up in person since she can always go back and look at it. Memories change but texts don't.
/r/seduction11/11/25 06:57 PM
2

Rarely. If it happens it's usually someone I know from a shared social group.
/r/seduction10/11/25 07:57 PM
1

Don't use LinkedIn to message women for dates.
/r/seduction10/11/25 07:55 PM
8

It's kind of a nuanced thing. If you alter and obscure your natural personality by trying to mirror her interests and attempting to be what you think is her ideal man, then she'll likely pick up on it. But it's fine to be a gentleman. The key is to not draw attention to the fact or fish for her approval. You are polite because it's who you are while you otherwise still maintain your core personality. You can open doors for her, seat her at the table, walk on the traffic facing side of the sidewa…
/r/seduction10/11/25 06:45 AM
1

Just be honest and answer the question.
/r/seduction10/11/25 12:56 AM
-1

OP's situation sounds like a miserable hamster wheel. I personally could not do that. You're wasting a considerable amount of time just to potentially have a few minutes of sex every now and then. You say you don't want a relationship, but yet you could be having sex all the time in that scenario. Even a few years into a marriage and we were still having sex daily. As you're experiencing, trying to force interactions just with a goal of sex is not all that sustainable of a model. I go in with th…
/r/seduction09/11/25 11:41 PM
2

It's a ymmv thing. But there are likely very steep diminishing returns or even a point where many women may be turned off by the look. The typical powerlifter look can frankly just make you look strong but fat. A natural looking physique where it looks like you do work out but not obsessively is probably a fair enough balance. But I say it with the caveat that you should work out for your own goals and not for the goal of seeking the approval of others. If you want to powerlift and really lift a…
/r/seduction09/11/25 05:30 PM
1

Forget dating right now. Focus on things more beneficial to your future such as learning how to invest money and also learna trade. Figure out things that you could turn into money making opportunities. If I could be a teen again I'd really focus on those things.
/r/seduction09/11/25 05:32 AM
1

Not everyone wants sex in the early stages while you're still essentially strangers. Even as a guy I fall into that box and prefer multiple dates to get a better idea if we have common ground and chemistry to potentially move forward into a relationship.
/r/seduction09/11/25 05:29 AM
9

Yeah, OP has some growing up to do with that line of thinking.
/r/seduction09/11/25 02:30 AM
1

No one will care but you. I live in a high cost of living area in LA, formerly Santa Monica and now Marina del Rey. I'm confident that no one else is thinking about my "reputation" based on dating. They have their own thing going. The same applies to practically everyone else. If you're a celebrity who is followed by paparazzi, then sure, tabloids will gossip about your dating life. But anyone else, not going to happen on any real noticeable level.
/r/seduction08/11/25 06:42 PM
2

I'd rather sleep with one good woman regularly over that 3.5 years.
/r/seduction08/11/25 06:38 PM
26

Clear red flags. Move along.
/r/seduction08/11/25 06:59 AM
1

I don't use it.
/r/seduction08/11/25 05:13 AM
5

It's often more of an online barrier. I'm 5'11 barefoot and always listed my true height on dating sites. Multiple women actually rejected for not being 6'0+. But on the flip side, I've been told before that I was taller than her ex or other dates who listed 6'. I don't think about height when going on dates or approaching anyone. I live in walking distance to the beach and often even go on first dates in sandals/slides. Also, I've been an avid volleyball player for over ten years and am often o…
/r/seduction08/11/25 03:33 AM
8

You'd look about 12 riding around on one.
/r/seduction08/11/25 03:27 AM
1

Get phone numbers and disassociate yourself from being an online fan or penpal even if you first met in person.
/r/seduction07/11/25 03:23 PM
1

Not sure if OP is trolling. You might need therapy and also PRep for peace of mind over HIV if it scares you that much.
/r/seduction07/11/25 03:15 PM
3

You don't have to use those environments if they're not your thing. I haven't been to a club in like ten years and it didn't stop me from getting a partner.
/r/seduction07/11/25 03:12 PM
5

Almost 35 and I haven't craved ONS since I was like 22.
/r/seduction07/11/25 08:32 AM
1

See a physician about your ED.
/r/seduction07/11/25 06:16 AM
1

You may need a break.
/r/seduction07/11/25 06:14 AM
11

Women aren't monolithic. Many will wait for a variety of reasons. As a guy, I generally prefer to take things slowly to spend more time courting, getting to know and so forth. I've been in multiple LTR including a marriage. Sex isn't a huge priority early on for me.
/r/seduction07/11/25 06:09 AM
1

Take more vocational classes.
/r/seduction07/11/25 06:07 AM
3

I don't even give it thought. Height is a factor out of your control. At 5'11 barefoot, it was occasionally an issue when using online dating because I correctly listed 5'11 and so not being 6'0+ would be filtered out of some searches or glossed over. But who cares? Anyone who would reject you over height is someone you don't need in your life.
/r/seduction07/11/25 06:04 AM
2

I don't do fast food.
/r/seduction07/11/25 06:00 AM
2

That's teenage level PUA garbage. Don't do that. If someone expresses to you that you are no longer wanted, you don't flip the script and make them try to win you over. You take a deep breath, move on and find someone who appreciates you. She's likely either seeing someone or is the process of putting herself out there. You might stay in contact for a little while but she's already emotionally checked out and the vibes will be more cold since you're no longer viewed as a boyfriend or her main ch…
/r/seduction03/11/25 06:57 PM
4

She's wanting to break up without being confrontational and is hoping you'll just agree and both move on. Breaking up isn't easy as the person on the receiving end of the break up is often assuming things are going well. Many women don't like being direct and try to use more subtle phrases like they need to work on themselves "it's me, not you." As someone else said, you can't really be in a position to chase at that point. No contact if you aren't married.
/r/seduction03/11/25 02:26 AM
0

Walk outside and talk to women. You go to a "big college" and thus there will be thousands of women on campus. Delete Tinder and start approaching. It's the easiest time in your life to do it as you already have many commonalities just from being a student.
/r/seduction02/11/25 10:14 PM
1

Narcissists and people with borderline will do this all the time. It's not uncommon to hear a woman with mental health issues say something like, "go ahead and wear that. Now I'm not going. You can't even do a simple task and change into xyz." Then when you comply she'll say something like "you're only doing it to shut me up," and it'll trigger an hour+ long monologue of her raising hell, breaking stuff, attacking you, etc. if you stand your ground and don't comply, same result.
/r/seduction31/10/25 08:53 AM
1

Walk around. There are women out at all hours day and night at most campuses. It's by far the easiest time in your life to make new friends and meet people in general. If it's a four-year university, then many of the women will also live on campus. It's a total bubble and you'll have plenty in common just from sharing the commonalities of being the same age range, being students, living in the same vicinity and so forth. Apps should not be needed.
/r/seduction31/10/25 08:15 AM
4

OP's displaying some bad red flags. The over calling is bad enough, but you really crossed the line by going to her work after she didn't return a call. That's deserving of a restraining order and trespassed from the store. Don't do that. I would say it's probably for the best to end communication and work on yourself. Respect others' boundaries and relax. Based on OP's previous posts, there are talks of mental health and previous abandonment. Your post sounded like textbook BPD. And your incess…
/r/seduction31/10/25 03:29 AM
1

I'd say don't or use it as low effort for when you're on the toilet or otherwise have nothing else to do.
/r/seduction31/10/25 03:24 AM
15

The best advice is to get off Instagram and talk to women offline. You're just going to look like a thirsty fan to this woman. She doesn't even know you.
/r/seduction29/10/25 07:26 PM
1

Definitely don't feel entitled to any sort of physical reimbursement. I even used to host first dates at my place in my 20s out of laziness so I didn't have to leave the house and could get to sleep after she left. I still used those dates for traditional courting like dinner, listening to music, talking, and so forth. We did not have sex even though the logistics were obviously aligned for it. But so what? I don't think of dates in terms of getting a kiss or getting laid early on.
/r/seduction29/10/25 05:54 AM
10

The best is the one you currently live in.
/r/seduction29/10/25 03:39 AM
1

Separate tip, but always wear earplugs at clubs. Your ears will thank you and you'll be able to hear speech better since it's filtering out the clutter around you.
/r/seduction28/10/25 03:47 AM
89

I did some approaching and went on multiple dates with college women after my divorce. This was after a year of therapy, gym, and so forth of serious regrouping. So I had just turned 33 and tried returning to familiar habits before I met my ex-wife. The thing was, I wasn't anticipating just how little I'd connect with them. It felt more like a father talking to his immature daughter. These women were mooching off parents, emotionally immature, and had unrealistic views of how the real world oper…
/r/seduction28/10/25 03:23 AM
1

OP didn't specify his goals.
/r/seduction28/10/25 12:05 AM
1

Life is what you make of it. For many, that is working hard, benefitting society and leaving a legacy behind (kids). Just because everyone dies doesn't mean life is meaningless.
/r/seduction27/10/25 08:40 PM
1

Your sentence doesn't make any sense.
/r/seduction27/10/25 08:18 PM
1

If there's no chemistry, you are free to move on. Don't try to force compatibility.
/r/seduction27/10/25 07:02 PM
1

Is your goal to be her boyfriend? If so, you could be setting the wrong intentions that early. You do you. I would spend more time courting but that's me. I've already been through multiple LTR including a marriage and so I greatly prefer to take it slow.
/r/seduction27/10/25 07:00 PM
2

Go somewhere you want to go because you are intrigued with the history, the culture, scenery and so forth, not the women. You were recently divorced. I was in the same boat and took a year off to regroup and find peace through therapy, gym, continuing my hobbies and so forth. Personally, in the scenario you described I would probably go to Greece, Netherlands, etc.
/r/seduction27/10/25 06:55 PM
1

That sounds rather narcissistic and incel-ish. Just because you were rejected doesn't mean she's an evil monster and you were the needle in the haystack, one in a million guy. Women aren't going to boyfriend every guy they go on a date with. Think about it for even a moment how many options they have. But luckily, nearly everyone on the planet finds a partner and has for centuries. Don't lie or go incel just based on a few missteps.
/r/seduction27/10/25 06:52 PM
7

You could also find a girlfriend and have sex with her all the time.
/r/seduction27/10/25 01:57 AM
1

There are already plenty of latina women here in LA. I generally go for other professional/career focused white women, but there's someone for everyone.
/r/seduction26/10/25 10:04 PM
1

Focus on wherever you currently live and treat it as the mecca. You're already there. Make the most of it.
/r/seduction26/10/25 10:03 PM
1

Sounds like a woman with BPD and/or NPD. My ex-wife also tried to bully and intimidate after I asked for a divorce. Document any proof you have in case you have to get police involved. If she wrote to them, request a copy of the texts.
/r/seduction26/10/25 09:57 PM
142

Also forcing her to make all the decisions.
/r/seduction26/10/25 09:52 PM
2

This thread has to be trolling.
/r/seduction26/10/25 07:20 PM
0

Indian guys often face a lot of discrimination from white women. I live in LA and see it a lot from Indian friends. Don't let it bother you. You'll find someone.
/r/seduction26/10/25 07:18 PM
2

I'd imagine it is very few women as you say. Women generally have no interest in younger, less experienced men. Part of what they find really attractive is his status, standing in the community and his drive in general, not just sex drive. A college kid just doesn't check those boxes. And it may remind her of her own kids. Even as a guy, I value life experience in women much more than I did in my 20s. I don't like to date women in progress who are still mooching off parents, are emotionally imma…
/r/seduction26/10/25 07:13 PM
1

It's wishy washy enough that you could still keep talking to her. You could even say something as mundane as "cool" and continue to talk to her while not focusing on that comment. But if you sense further bad vibes from her or disinterest, move on. If you say something like "why not?" then it's probably over.
/r/seduction26/10/25 06:47 PM
1

A woman is by far the best "wing" you'll ever have. Befriend women and she'll introduce you to her single friends. Just don't make friends solely to try to find a girlfriend. Do so out of genuine interest and because you like friends no matter if they're male or female.
/r/seduction26/10/25 06:44 PM
5

They're probably staring because other Gen Z guys your age are a newer breed of guys who live online and only occasionally walk outside to touch grass. They probably only use apps to meet women. You're a step ahead of the game and actually talking to them in person first. Keep doing what you're doing and ignore the reactions from others. Same with the female friends. Don't let it bother you or you could even talk to them.
/r/seduction26/10/25 06:39 PM
1

Good for you, but you may want to try condensing your thoughts.
/r/seduction26/10/25 03:36 AM
1

You said it yourself, clubs are chaotic places for most people. They're too loud, flashing lights can give you headaches, and they're just an awkward pace and volume level for trying to talk to someone. I quit going to them around age 25 and haven't missed them. You might do better in a slower paced environment where people aren't drinking and acting as immaturely.
/r/seduction26/10/25 03:33 AM
1

Just wait until you get a girlfriend and you can just look at each other and know you're both ready.
/r/seduction26/10/25 03:28 AM
7

Doesn't matter. Quit thinking of virginity as some kind of chip on your shoulder. Try to find genuine connection and compatibility. The sex will follow. You ideally want sex to just be one component of a solid relationship, not the bullseye. Ease off on the pressure of getting laid and instead talk to women and find one you like enough through talking and getting to know. Again, the sex will follow.
/r/seduction26/10/25 03:26 AM
17

I'd say it's more of a mindset that continues through marriage. It's more than sex and isn't just some kind of gimmick to get a woman. Keeping her is much more difficult. You have to still keep your partner engaged, take her on regular dates, listen to her and so forth no matter if it's month two or year thirty. You can't take her for granted at any point and have to keep her on her toes, loved and appreciated. You can still tease your partner long after you've an established couple. The problem…
/r/seduction26/10/25 03:23 AM
0

I don't do one night stands.
/r/seduction25/10/25 09:35 PM
5

Wrong sub. But get your mental health under control such as seeking therapy. You can get a baseline STI test to see what, if any, viruses you've been exposed to. Then get vaccinated for anything you haven't been exposed to like HPV, Hepatitis A & B, etc. Be very firm on condom use every time or you don't have sex. Keep condoms on you just in case the other person tries to pull excuses or runs out. Beyond that, you can't do much else. If you cover those bases you can't complain.
/r/seduction25/10/25 09:28 PM
3

Who cares? Do you act on every impulse you have? I'd sure hope not. Leave them be and let them deal with it themselves. They were pretty clear of what they want and it's not up to you to change her mind as if she's just playing hard to get.
/r/seduction25/10/25 09:25 PM
1

It matters way more to you than any woman.
/r/seduction25/10/25 05:33 PM
5

You already know your answer. Just don't pursue them.
/r/seduction25/10/25 05:32 PM
1

Why are you putting all your eggs into the online basket? Work on getting out of the house and meeting people. You'll also be way less awkward when going on a date as you'll be used to the direct feedback of talking to women in person.
/r/seduction25/10/25 02:17 AM
1

Join shared activity groups. My main ones over the years have been volleyball and rock climbing. I've met a lot of people through both and even dated this way. Join groups you already like or are interested to start/learn.
/r/seduction25/10/25 02:14 AM
2

I've known plenty of guys who cold approach even in their rural town and still found a partner.
/r/seduction25/10/25 02:09 AM
0

Walk away.
/r/seduction25/10/25 02:06 AM
3

Type 5 sounds like every woman who spends all her time in West Hollywood.
/r/seduction24/10/25 08:35 PM
5

You do you. Pace is something I find works well for me to not fall into bad relationships. It's not a guarantee, obviously, but I find people tend to make abrupt dating decisions after having sex as you may over romanticize your standing just because you got laid. But it's important to really qualify her before having sex as many guys will be more complacent and be less inquisitive from that point onward. You need to be sincere with yourself on why you want her and how she would be as a team. A …
/r/seduction24/10/25 06:52 PM
12

There's not really a specific pinpoint from my experiences. However, I ignore the old dating tropes like the third date rule where some guys move on if no sex by then. That's pretty silly. I generally like to build strong rapport first, go on multiple dates, do a lot of talking and so forth. Sex is more of a marker of when I've learned a good bit about her, have been on multiple dates and want to make her my girlfriend. I wouldn't have sex if the vibes are off and I can't see us being a couple; …
/r/seduction24/10/25 06:44 PM
12

Be a gentleman out of sincereness, not as some hokey tactic to get you laid. It's perfectly fine to treat her like a lady while maintaining your core identity and not otherwise comprising your sense of self and dignity. The same goes for kindness. As long as you aren't being a yes man and demonstrate that you function independently as a person and aren't trying to manipulate like a nice guy, you should be fine. Cocky can be a razor's edge. I'd say keep it in your lane in alignment with your natu…
/r/seduction24/10/25 06:25 PM
17

I don't have that as a goal on the first few dates. Even in my 20s there were many times where I'd literally host the first date at my place and we didn't have sex. I still treated it as a more conventional courting date with dinner, chit chat, listening to music and so forth. Tinder culture and Netflix and chill probably changed the innocence of simple at home dates, though they're probably not the best idea from a safety perspective. Just because the logistics were there didn't automatically l…
/r/seduction24/10/25 05:51 PM
3

Yeah, I thought my relationship was going great. That is until ChatGPT seduced her behind my back and now I'm paying child support for mixed AI babies that aren't even mine. /s
/r/seduction24/10/25 04:57 PM
1

Hikes were my go to when I was in my 20s and for a time had to schedule dates at 6am. It was such a ridiculous time for a date that most women agreed to go along with it as a new experience if they had the schedule for it. Predictably, most of those dates were with women who obviously were active athlete types or gym goers. Not everyone likes to hike or go for a long walk. But I really enjoyed those, even if nothing came from it other than just that one date; it was nice to share the early morni…
/r/seduction24/10/25 06:20 AM
2

Chalk it up as a learning experience and try again with someone else. Forget about your unhinged rant or the thought of revenge. Take a deep breath and regroup.
/r/seduction24/10/25 06:14 AM
1

I always go into dating with the intention of a long term relationship, so I do ask a lot of questions about her. I genuinely want to know about her before investing in multiple dates. I do a good bit of listening, ask follow-ups and also observe for red flags. No one's perfect, but you want to make sure she's respectful and on the right path in life.
/r/seduction24/10/25 04:30 AM
3

Plenty of others are also getting back into dating after a divorce. I am one of them and also divorced almost three years ago. Things changed a lot for the worse, in my opinion, for online dating compared to around a decade ago when dating sites then placed a lot of value in profiles. But now it's just about photos and hoping the woman is mature and not ADHD, thus able to hold conversation among a sea of a million messages from other guys. It does sound like you pretty much have all the key surf…
/r/seduction24/10/25 04:10 AM
2

That's the right attitude. I'm 5'11" and have played a lot of relatively high level amateur/non-pro volleyball over the years. Most of the guys are taller than me. Even plenty of women; the female pro level national team player's height is over 6 feet tall. For guys, the average is at least 6'5. Rec/amateur players tend to be pretty tall for both sexes as well. But I don't think about it, nor do they. The only person bothered by height is the person who feels insecure about his own height. I'll …
/r/seduction24/10/25 03:48 AM
3

A lot. But the main sticking point was she had severe BPD that she refused to treat or even acknowledge, and instead she wanted to deal with conflicts through verbal put downs and physical violence instead of rational adult teamwork.
/r/seduction24/10/25 03:37 AM
6

I'm fine with traditional courting and taking things slowly. But if I sense bad vibes or things like possible BPD/NPD, it's often for the best to just move on. I put up with too much in my marriage to be treated like that again.
/r/seduction23/10/25 09:06 PM
13

I'd say move away from apps. Women are getting hundreds to thousands of matches. You're one of many guys she's going on a date with. Even like ten years ago I remember going on dates where women said they were overwhelmed by online dating. It's like when you go to a new restaurant that has seemingly a thousand different speciality items on the menu and you can't make up your mind, so you just throw your hands up in the air and order a cheeseburger.
/r/seduction23/10/25 07:44 PM
1

No insults, period. Some of the old "negs" from PUA were both corny and just piss women off, like commenting about her nails, hair and body with the undertone that it may be a slight. Looking back, my ex-wife pretty much used "negs" in a negative way as digs and I put up with them then because she was really hot. Don't try to be an asshole because you think it oozes confidence or will make you look like an anti-nice guy.
/r/seduction23/10/25 03:26 PM
2

I was also married several years. Got divorced at 32, took a full year off from any dating to regroup. Then I went on quite a few dates in the time since. I ended up dropping online dating/apps as it's just a bit too impersonal and frankly unnecessary. I focused purely on cold approach and social game. My current girlfriend of a few months was introduced through a mutual female friend.
/r/seduction23/10/25 03:14 PM
1

You aren't boyfriend material to her. It doesn't mean you aren't boyfriend material overall, just not to her.
/r/seduction23/10/25 03:09 PM
1

Women in that age range are often still living as dependents and mooching off parents, so they aren't thinking long term. After my divorce I went on dates with some women in that age range and was frustrated with how emotionally and financially immature they were and overall seemed clueless on how the real world operates. In many cases parents were literally paying for their college and handing them an allowance. I didn't pursue more dates with them.
/r/seduction23/10/25 03:06 PM
3

I wouldn't personally use it, free or paid versions. You'll have instant feedback talking to people in person while apps are just a more impersonal route and more unnecessary steps.
/r/seduction23/10/25 03:02 PM
1

None, really. Maybe Match if given a choice since it still has a reputation for people seeking long term relationships. But I'd imagine there are many, many bots.
/r/seduction23/10/25 02:58 PM
2

None. The PUA type systems operate under false pretenses as the ones like Mystery Method and their ilk are based around deception and performance through crafting a cocky persona, not genuine character building.
/r/seduction23/10/25 02:55 PM
1

Zoning in on guys' insecurities and vulnerabilities has long been their sales pitch. Relate to the clients, tell them you've been in their shoes and your new life mission is to help other guys struggling to date. Show them photos and scripted videos of yourself surrounded by paid actresses masquerading as local club hotties as "social proof." And then comes the hard selling with moving towards recurring bill cycles through subscriptions, books, seminars, boot camps, or social media subs and clic…
/r/seduction22/10/25 07:38 PM
2

That's a pretty significant life experience gap. They'll probably feel they have nothing to talk about with you and vice versa. When I was 18-22, even the nontraditional undergrads who were like 27 stood out like a sore thumb and were ostracized from any social engagements with the classes. Obviously moreso when people were in their 30s and beyond. I remember other college kids thinking a 32 year old woman who was in several of our shared classes was a grandmother. That's how warped perceptions …
/r/seduction22/10/25 05:15 PM
1

Be a rebel and go as yourself.
/r/seduction22/10/25 05:14 PM
4

Don't lovebomb, it's a sign of neediness and potentially even a mental disorder. People with BPD, for example, almost always lovebomb because their hallmark trait is fear of abandonment.
/r/seduction22/10/25 05:13 PM
6

I often don't kiss on the first date, either. It generally doesn't lead to a rejection of a second date if it otherwise went well. At this point, I'm looking for long term and so I don't like to rush things earlier on. I try to focus on getting to know and see how well we clash on a personality level. Maybe it's because I'm almost 35 and try to date other mature women who are also fine with taking things a bit slowly.
/r/seduction22/10/25 05:10 PM
17

Most of those PUA guys are shills who are just e-marketers, not guys who are skilled with dating.
/r/seduction22/10/25 05:05 PM
1

"I'm a confident guy who doesn't need Instagram in his life."
/r/seduction22/10/25 06:29 AM
3

He both lied and deleted posts after being called out on lying for no reason. There was nothing to "dox." OP made it difficult to warrant further engagement after losing all credibility.
/r/seduction21/10/25 02:25 PM
43

You already mentioned STIs. Obviously wear a condom each time you have sex and make sure to change rubbers when alternating between anal/vaginal. Hopefully you were vaccinated for HPV at some point. Also Hepatitis A & B. Whatever she's doing with you, she is doing with multiple others.
/r/seduction21/10/25 07:18 AM
3

OP conveniently deleted his previous threads from less than a month ago where he talked about being a bored 39 year old married guy.
/r/seduction21/10/25 06:02 AM
3

That was a guy fishing for wiener pics or the person is an escort.
/r/seduction20/10/25 08:50 AM
3

It's a pseudoscience. Plus, The Game is a novel with likely a good deal of exaggeration to make the book more entertaining. It was written for a general mainstream audience, not PUA dorks.
/r/seduction20/10/25 05:11 AM
186

OP, I'm also almost 35 and was married for several years. What I did was take the entire first year off from dating or approaching women after my divorce to get in a better headspace and build healthy routines. I'm not sure how far out from divorce you are at this point. I also initially went on a few dates with college aged women only to quickly realize I didn't relate to them on really any level. I'd grown and matured quite a bit since I started dating my then wife in my 20s. Their financial s…
/r/seduction20/10/25 05:02 AM
1

Any place is fine. Don't allow yourself to sink into limiting beliefs based on your location. Even people in rural towns can date just fine. I wouldn't personally choose an area based on the perception of a strong dating scene. However, weather is definitely a strong factor. I moved to LA after college and have lived here over a decade. I chose the coastal cities of Santa Monica and then Marina del Rey because they're on average multiple degrees cooler than the city proper while still having ple…
/r/seduction20/10/25 02:27 AM
1

Can you? Sure. Would I? No. I don't do one night stands.
/r/seduction20/10/25 02:25 AM
1

Vegas is a big no from me primarily due to the overly hot summers and for the lack of career diversity. Even for weather, I chose to live in the cooler, coastal parts of LA (Santa Monica and then Marina del Rey) rather than the city prosper.
/r/seduction20/10/25 02:24 AM
6

No, don't lie. If a woman flakes on OP for not liking his profession, then he should consider it a blessing she's that transparent in her shallowness. Someone else will enjoy him for who he is.
/r/seduction20/10/25 02:19 AM
1

Qualify the women you're talking to and find one you like enough to make your girlfriend. Then immediately stop talking to the others.
/r/seduction19/10/25 08:12 AM
2

Correct answer. OP is just venting with limiting beliefs about himself. The best course of action is to work on yourself, not to move in the desperate hope that a change in scenery will miraculously fix all of your problems.
/r/seduction19/10/25 08:08 AM
7

That would be beyond idiotic to do. Maybe if you're like 65+ and a widow. But you're young and should be placing the priority on making money, building connections, etc, not "rizzing" abroad. Think about it for even a couple seconds and you'll realize how ridiculous your post sounds.
/r/seduction19/10/25 12:31 AM
3

OP almost sounds like a clever entrepreneur trying to gauge interest to bring that old relic back.
/r/seduction19/10/25 12:28 AM
1

You're allowed to ask him yourself.
/r/seduction19/10/25 12:26 AM
1

Many of the "coaches" used paid actresses or female friends in their videos. The average PUA type coach was rarely a ladies man but instead just a guy who figured out how to prey on lonely and desperate guys through aggressive internet marketing. Strauss and Mystery are obviously the most notable ones because Neil Strauss was already a best-selling author before The Game and Mystery was his central character for the spin-off to cash in on the popularity of the book/fad. The more contemporary coa…
/r/seduction18/10/25 06:05 PM
5

It continues even through marriage.
/r/seduction18/10/25 05:02 PM
1

I'm pretty vigilant of red flags and nothing that she said triggered bad vibes from either line or even the way you described her facial expressions. She was being both funny and honest with you. If you can't work out a date with her after multiple attempts, then definitely move on. But there's nothing wrong with her letting you know she'll be busy. People don't drop everything they had planned just to go on a date with a stranger.
/r/seduction18/10/25 01:14 AM
0

Don't worry about it. Get a job ASAP if you don't have one already. And if you do currently have a job, strongly consider adding a second job. Work on building, saving and investing money. You're still young and can really get things moving along nicely. Put dating aside right now and work on your financial situation.
/r/seduction18/10/25 01:11 AM
0

How do you even have the time to talk to 5-6 different women at once? It sounds like you have no life and/or are unemployed. Focus on getting your priorities in check. Don't string others along or have sex with multiple women unless you're in contact with each of them and all agree to it before dating you (they most likely won't, but use common sense here). You should know better by 27. If this thread were coming from a high schooler I could understand but you're a grown man. I can't tell if OP …
/r/seduction17/10/25 07:27 PM
2

I can remember two different guys who went to classes in a full suit and with a briefcase as a backpack. One was only like 24 and had graduated a few years before, had a regular job and was taking a few undergrad classes to apply for a grad program. All the college kids assumed he was like 35+. The other guy actually was around 35 and it sounded like he was finishing his first degree while also still working his regular job. Both guys definitely stood out, but kind of for the wrong reasons aroun…
/r/seduction17/10/25 05:13 PM
2

OP definitely does come across as more of a fan. He's self aware of the fact that he's followed her for ages and she probably has no clue who he is or that he was even a "follower." It was a pretty weak conversation starter and just didn't really give her a decent reason to want to meet.
/r/seduction17/10/25 07:32 AM
1

This is most human beings. You're not some weird outlier. I far prefer relationship sex over hook ups. The caveat is if the relationship reaches a point where I lose respect, lose trust or resent her. Then the sex will suffer because the emotional connection is fractured or even gone.
/r/seduction17/10/25 07:17 AM
3

That's a big improvement in logistics. If you feel you can make it work and you two have good chemistry, it sounds worth pursuing. You previously had some hang ups with organizing meet ups and so you'll need to work on that.
/r/seduction17/10/25 07:09 AM
10

Long sleeve dress shirt with sandals is a pretty typical prep style. I wore that quite a bit and no one ever batted an eye. But long dress pants and dress shoes is pretty dorky for college. If people are filming on the walk away, OP must have looked pretty silly out there.
/r/seduction17/10/25 07:01 AM
4

Those college kids probably figured you were trolling or just found you looked out of place for the environment and wanted to share the video with their friends for a laugh.
/r/seduction17/10/25 06:50 AM
3

Oh, didn't know Louis CK posted on Reddit.
/r/seduction17/10/25 06:46 AM
1

Huh? I lived in Santa Monica for over a decade and only recently moved in the last two years after my divorce just 4-5 miles down the road to Marina del Rey. It's nothing like you're talking about. I only moved because I was able to sell my old place and found a new one with an extra bedroom and more square footage, all for less money than my SM place. I still spend a considerable amount of time in Santa Monica.
/r/seduction17/10/25 02:07 AM
2

Those are interesting points. Harvard researchers are certainly smarter on these topics than Reddit anons.
/r/seduction17/10/25 01:47 AM
1

Well, that makes sense. Any group you post to will obviously include your real name and a link to your profile. I'd be fine with that for comfort/congruence building. I just had no idea all this time there was actually an official dating part of the site. As long as it doesn't post all the activity to the timeline, I don't see a really big deal there.
/r/seduction16/10/25 10:11 PM
1

Does it post to your feed where your entire friend/follower list sees it in the timeline? I've had Facebook since like 2007 or something but never used Facebook dating.
/r/seduction16/10/25 07:34 PM
3

This is the easiest time in your life to make new friends and date. You already have way more in common than you realize with so many people by being in the same age range, living in the same bubble, taking the same classes, etc. You should not have any trouble starting a conversation with so many commonalities. You can talk about anything from classes to campus life to really anything you want. There aren't set parameters; you just talk to her.
/r/seduction16/10/25 07:23 PM
29

I get what OP is saying. People do definitely need to work on limiting the high dopamine distractions that can hinder progress and motivation. Time seemed to move in a slower motion before smartphone internet and fast paced 24/7 social media. Before then you at least had to have access to a laptop or desktop computer and so most people were more focused without constant distractions at their fingertips. Now people are terribly addicted to screens which can also lead to more junk food/snacking an…
/r/seduction16/10/25 07:13 PM
1

Love is great when it's genuine. Too many times we fall for lust that we think is love only because we don't want to lose a beautiful woman. That was the mistake I made with my ex-wife. At this point I'm fine with walking away from anyone I don't feel comfortable around, if there's not mutual respect, or if I don't see any real future with the two of us as a team. Sex in and of itself is not a valid reason anymore to start a new relationship or maintain a bad relationship; there needs to be mult…
/r/seduction16/10/25 06:59 PM
1

Those are the two primary reasons. I won't talk to women who appear to have been drinking. Clubs and bars are places I retired from going by around 25 and it was for the better. It makes me shake my head when I see posts of guys wanting to have drinks with women on earlier dates. You want to meet people and get a proper impression when they're in a 100% sober state. Some guys also will overlook typical "crazy" red flags if she's really attractive. But if anything's off kilter, you have to be ver…
/r/seduction16/10/25 09:02 AM
46

Hook ups aren't for everyone. I had similar reflections after doing them from around ages 18-21. It was just what I called itchy balls syndrome. Casual/randoms were overall pretty meaningless and just not that memorable since it lacked emotional investment. I rarely even think back to hook-ups and instead reflect more on how I could have changed certain aspects of relationships and mistakes made. Try to focus on connecting with women on multiple levels. Find several things you like about her bey…
/r/seduction16/10/25 08:36 AM
4

Whether you realized it or not, you gave her a "neg." That exact line was popular among incels and followers of PUA during the era of The Game/Mystery Method. Women generally find it insulting and you just found out for yourself. Consider it a learning experience. Your momentum was going well until you blundered with that line or at least dropping it over text. You might've saved face IRL with the right delivery. I'll cut you a little slack here. It's just a cheesy line and she probably could've…
/r/seduction16/10/25 02:01 AM
3

Never used Facebook dating, but I generally find Facebook is still by far the best of the social platforms to help build trust. People generally have their family members, people they went to school with, IRL friends and even co-workers eyeing and contributing to their feed. I have like 18+ years of post history going back to when I was a teen. It's easy comfort building through congruence cross-examination.
/r/seduction16/10/25 01:54 AM
1

A beauty salon may really catch women off guard. Not many guys typically go to them, though some do. And I'd imagine guys actually asking other customers out rarely happens. So even if a woman there was interested, being put on the spot in that environment would probably make her uncomfortable as she wouldn't expect it and probably wouldn't be in the mood for it.
/r/seduction15/10/25 09:40 PM
2

No clue on the politics. I just see the approaches a lot. The sad thing about LA is actors and influencers getting free meals "on the house" because they draw attention wherever they go, or if they're influencer types those dweebs will demand a free meal in exchange for a shout-out. I've only known one influencer with a large following and he rarely had to pay for a meal. It's different with say a date. It's expected for the man to pay for all expenses when he's the host unless there's an arrang…
/r/seduction15/10/25 09:18 PM
6

It may depend on the area. I see guys approaching all the time in LA. I used to live in Santa Monica and now Marina del Rey. Guys approach constantly around Venice and SM, especially on the beach and boardwalks. My ex-wife was approached a lot and at times even when I was with her. Just because most Gen Z kids live on the internet and are afraid of their own shadow doesn't mean there aren't risk takers out there who walk outside.
/r/seduction15/10/25 08:50 PM
2

It'll be a huge red flag. Women will assume two things: you're broke and living with parents or that you're married. You could temporarily make it happen. Car is probably the easiest. Going to a hotel makes it sound more like you're married and don't want her to know where you live. However, you really need to work on getting your own place. I'd even recommend getting a second job and just put dating on the back burner right now. You can use this as motivation to start dating again when you have…
/r/seduction15/10/25 07:46 PM
1

He's 6'5 and yet he still often wore boots and platform shoes to appear even taller. He went for a freakshow circus type of peacocking like when someone over 7 feet tall is in a room and you can't not notice them.
/r/seduction15/10/25 04:59 PM
1

Not everyone uses social media. I still find Facebook to be the gold standard as it's been around for around two decades and most people my age (34) have probably used it for over fifteen years with a long history of posts and so forth. And I value posts/IRL friends and family interactions far more than people who just spam pictures and memes. to her wall.
/r/seduction15/10/25 09:14 AM
2

Don't worry so much about the timing. You're still only 24. But if you know for sure you only want something purely casual, be honest and direct about it to every woman you match.
/r/seduction15/10/25 09:08 AM
2

Nice guys go out of their way to try to be the ideal guy they think she wants. They'll pretend to reinvent their personality based around the girl they want. It's pathetic. If you asked the same guy months later about the things he pretended to like, the ideals he pretended to have and so forth, he'd draw a blank because it was insincere and based around one person. Such a guy would also look foolish around anyone he knows because he'd act completely differently. You can obviously be nice/kind a…
/r/seduction15/10/25 05:40 AM
2

I had a house in Santa Monica and no one likely cared because everyone else around here has money. I couldn't afford a beachfront property, but one probably would impress others if that's your thing. I ended up moving down the road to Marina del Rey which skews considerably older and quieter than my previous neighborhood. I'm one of the younger people in my hood at 34. But I got an extra bedroom and decently more square footage for less than my house 4-5 miles away.
/r/seduction15/10/25 04:45 AM
1

I guess adding muscle. But it never really had noticeable dating effects after I was maybe like 21. I mainly do it now for routine and to stay in shape for volleyball and rock climbing.
/r/seduction15/10/25 04:41 AM
2

I'll assume you're really young if you're concerned about both Instagram and "rizz." Get them offline as soon as possible. Demonstrate that you're a real person and not just someone who is terminally online and seeking validation/followers/penpals. You said you did get a few dates and that's good. Once you see her in person you have to get to know her story, be a good listener and so forth. Project your natural personality and if you like the vibe, stay positive and request another date. If she …
/r/seduction14/10/25 08:00 PM
1

Most dating coaches will just prey on your loneliness and desperation and see you as an easy grifting target. Not saying there aren't genuine ones out there, but just like the posts on this sub it's essentially unlicensed life coaching. Dating coaches may have no more experience with women than you.
/r/seduction14/10/25 06:49 PM
8

If you're not naturally a "bad boy," don't feign that kind of persona. You'll quickly tire of the act and her/others will quickly see through the mask. I realize you said you were still trying to be respectful and not cross any lines with these "experiments." But you're still playing a character as you're self aware that what you're doing is acting. Old PUA material like Mystery Method is also highly calculated and performative, which is not something you want to do in your daily life as you can…
/r/seduction14/10/25 05:33 PM
1

It's clingy. And it's also a textbook symptom of BPD. That obviously doesn't mean anyone who love bombs has the disorder, but it's something to pay attention to when it happens as it's not normal behavior for grown adults to express their love and infatuation very early into dating.
/r/seduction14/10/25 05:15 PM
1

Guys could easily find three dates in their current location, even a rural town. They just have limiting beliefs that no one's out there because they've been there for a time.
/r/seduction14/10/25 05:13 PM
11

Get vaccinated for HPV.
/r/seduction14/10/25 05:11 PM
1

You can be a gentleman and hold doors open, seat her at the table and so forth. That's not "nice guy" behavior. I'd say the key is to not wait for her reactions. In other words, do these things and just carry out without drawing any attention to it. So don't pause and wait for a thank you or eye contact, etc. Treat it as normal behavior and not like you're seeking positive approval each time.
/r/seduction14/10/25 05:07 PM
1

$100 a night for a hotel is really cheap, or at least would be around here. You wouldn't find one for a hundred bucks. But if you want to budget and put more money towards sightseeing and tourism, just go with the hostel. You're on vacation. You can date when you return home.
/r/seduction14/10/25 05:48 AM
2

Nothing scripted. I try to talk to them like a normal human being.
/r/seduction14/10/25 02:23 AM
1

Mental illness.
/r/seduction13/10/25 05:34 PM
3

If she displays low interest after the first date, such as ghosting, then you may be over romanticizing the first date. Even if you have memories of her smiling or you both kissed or even had sex, that doesn't mean she will want a second date with you. It could be for any variety of reasons like she sees you as a non-serious option, you don't appear to be boyfriend material or any random thing. Don't take it personally. I've also had dates that I thought went pretty well but then a few days late…
/r/seduction13/10/25 05:32 PM
1

The fantasy of a lifestyle. Sex is part of it, but it's far from everything. It's more abstract than just wanting to get physical.
/r/seduction13/10/25 05:25 PM
1

It's a fundamental component. You need to believe in yourself to approach and take risks in general. Is it everything? Of course not. Does it greatly help? Definitely. You want positive energy in your life and positive affirmations for the strength to take chances and succeed. Michael Jordan had the confidence to take the last shot when the clock was winding down and a championship on the line. You should ideally believe in yourself that no one is too good for you, that you can handle approaches…
/r/seduction13/10/25 05:20 PM
2

Looks and personality aren't the only factors.
/r/seduction13/10/25 05:16 PM
0

It's more than just sex. It's also her fantasizing about a particular lifestyle. Even guys who are below average looks can still have "sex appeal" when they have money/status. I know some guys who would get swiped left all day every time on apps based on their looks but women are drawn in to their lifestyle. This might be more of an LA thing. Wealth can easily make up for looks and conjure sex appeal.
/r/seduction13/10/25 05:08 PM
9

24-49 is a pretty substantial age gap. Even 25+ could be an issue as you have nothing to show for your life experience at 21 other than being a student. It's one of the main reasons at 34 I don't date 21 year old women; they lack financial independence, emotional maturity, have unrealistic views of the world post-college, haven't demonstrated they can be responsible adults on their own, etc. For dating, it may be an uphill battle each age beyond 24 or so for you as women will want someone who is…
/r/seduction13/10/25 05:01 PM
0

If you're teaching a bunch of immature middle schoolers, they'll say dumb stuff. Hopefully you aren't taking any of their comments personally and are sending them to detention or whatever disciplinary actions schools use these days.
/r/seduction13/10/25 08:30 AM
11

Plus more than one complaint and you could be banned and trespassed from the property.
/r/seduction13/10/25 02:37 AM
1

I was already skeptical of MM as a teenager in 2009, so no.
/r/seduction12/10/25 11:56 PM
1

A phone call before meeting up was pretty vital when I used online dating. You have to humanize yourself as a person and texting doesn't help.
/r/seduction12/10/25 11:52 PM
5

My hookup fad years were like ages 18-21 during undergrad college. It was pretty easy as we all lived on campus and had ample free time. But I started to realize that meaningless sex just wasn't for me without the emotional bond of a pending or ongoing relationship. I personally wouldn't hook up just to get over a break up, but you do you.
/r/seduction12/10/25 11:39 PM
3

Keep him happy and respect his independence. Let him be him. The sex drive for my ex-wife only dipped when I lost respect for her as a person and she refused to seek help for her mental illness/BPD. Otherwise, the key was to not be entirely predictable. Change everything up like where you get frisky, what time of day, how you do it and so forth. And continue to tease each other. Just because you're a long term couple doesn't mean you can't enjoy each other for many years. The key in my experienc…
/r/seduction12/10/25 10:52 PM
10

Don't use your height as an excuse. It's just not a factor you can change other than getting a dangerous limb lengthening surgery. Work on the things you can change and progress like your confidence, your fitness/diet and your career. I've known guys like 6" shorter than me who have much easier times finding dates. The key is to not let it bother you or demonstrate to anyone that it bothers you. Some of these guys were even short and fat. Not everyone is a monolith and doomed to failure if they …
/r/seduction12/10/25 10:48 PM
7

Veneers, though it seems like everyone else in LA has them.
/r/seduction12/10/25 10:32 PM
0

Use the phone to setup a date. I generally will give a call first. Most people don't answer phone calls from unknown numbers and so a text first saying who you are and that you're about to call may help for the setup. I generally find voice communication to be far superior in the earlier stages and leads to less flaking on average. You can do more texting when you're a couple, but I'd say it's important to humanize yourself as much as possible early on.
/r/seduction12/10/25 07:22 PM
1

No. /thread
/r/seduction12/10/25 07:19 PM
3

It's "broscience." Bringing up BPD is important because people with it do not have the normal emotional regulations of people without it. People with it always feel like others are taking advantage of them, betraying them and abandoning them/or they feel it's coming at any moment. My ex had it and could go from "I love you so much" to five minutes later going "get the fuck away from me. I hope you die! You're like every other man!" and then might randomly punch me in the face just from me scroll…
/r/seduction12/10/25 07:06 PM
4

Posts of him talking about BPD will show up within a few seconds of clicking on his post history. It may not be directly mentioned in the current thread, but it's an important puzzle piece.
/r/seduction12/10/25 01:39 AM
23

OP's post history mentions he has BPD. People with it have extreme emotional mismanagement and an uncertain sense of self. They think people are always taking advantage of them and they'll eventually cope with self harming themselves and/or harming their partners in many cases. Again, I hope the best for OP. But it's a very serious mental health disorder that requires a lot of work to manage. Unfortunately my ex would not seek care and preferred to just blame everyone else and bring on physical …
/r/seduction11/10/25 07:52 PM
-3

You sound pretty immature yourself for a man over 30. Therapy may be the right approach and hopefully you stick with it. No one should "become a bad boy" because of previous missteps in the dating process. It sounds like you aren't attracting the most compatible women and it further sounds like you aren't exactly sure who you are yourself. Update to the post: ouch, so you have BPD. You need to take that very seriously and get it under control as best you possibly can. My ex-wife also had BPD and…
/r/seduction11/10/25 07:29 PM
0

Seduction continues through marriage. To the OP, if you can imagine it and communicate it with your SO then have fun. There should be mutual high trust by this point. The key is obviously variety. Switch up the times, locations, and just twist the formula around in general. Tease her throughout the day sometimes for a little buildup. If you're both happy in the relationship then the intimacy should always be there. In my marriage, I only got tired of the sex when my ex really started to disrespe…
/r/seduction11/10/25 04:58 PM
1

It can be a good and low effort way to spice things up. I don't go for hookups and so if I could get a solid date and conversation, etc, that was a win. I'd say don't go out of your way to use the card as just a gimmicky prop. In other words, don't get cards printed just to lure people in for dating. It can work because it's low pressure for her as she's not giving you her number or having to think about that situation on the spot; you're giving her your info first and she can decide on her own …
/r/seduction10/10/25 07:59 PM
2

Maybe like ten out of a hundred cards handed out which I considered pretty decent odds. It's worth a try for the guys who already have business cards for their job. They're just so cheap and disposable like I mentioned that it's no loss to hand them out at will if you want. I did more sporadically; you just have to remember who you've been talking to if you hand them out with any real frequency since the woman will be making the first contact.
/r/seduction10/10/25 07:52 PM
2

This is very relatable as we're the same age and it's practically the same timeline as I got married at 27. Dating did feel much different when I put myself back out there. A large reason for that is I had changed as well; you may be different in some respects compared to 26-27. 34 is pretty old for the club scene. I had already moved on from them by around 25 and don't miss them at all. Plus, the women there tend to be more immature, less responsible, etc. At 34 I value a woman with her ducks i…
/r/seduction10/10/25 07:47 PM
10

Yet another ad and baiting guys for clicks and new clients.
/r/seduction10/10/25 07:35 PM
3

Not sure what posts came up, but I have posted multiple times about handing out my business card. I had a lot of them made and they're cheap enough in bulk to basically be disposable like napkins. I didn't use them all the time or anything for dating. The best scenario is usually say if you're at a store or otherwise a place of business where the woman is working and there's just no time to chat or by doing so it may get her in trouble with management. I'm in a relationship now, but when I was s…
/r/seduction10/10/25 07:32 PM
55

A variety of reasons. Convenience because you don't have to look outside of your workspace; it can save a lot of time from having to roam the streets or swiping on apps during valued free time. There may be some level of familiarity and commonality since you're in a similar line of work. You may share mutual friends/coworkers. Competition and wanting to get into a relationship with her before other guys at the office make a move, etc.
/r/seduction10/10/25 07:20 PM
0

This question gets asked nearly every day. It's almost like Mystery and Strauss have alt accounts to try to maintain relevancy.
/r/seduction09/10/25 12:37 PM
2

Asians aren't my type for dating/sex, but there are certainly tons of them in the Bay Area of SF proper, Fremont, Daly City, etc. I think more of Irvine because it's closer to LA down in Orange County. Like SF, I rarely have a need to go to the OC. Good people in all mentioned areas.
/r/seduction09/10/25 12:13 PM
5

Fair point. It's similar around West Hollywood, a very gay neighborhood of LA. I find the LGBTQ population to be really cool and friendly. Anyone who thinks they're in general bad people need to get out and touch grass. I rarely go to San Fran but the gay groups there are probably the coolest folks and they obviously won't be in competition for any women you may try to date.
/r/seduction08/10/25 02:18 PM
13

There are plenty of workers not in tech. It's like saying every woman here in LA is in the entertainment industry or trying to be as a waitress/barista. There's a lot of career diversity and diversity in general.
/r/seduction08/10/25 04:20 AM
2

Don't move to a high cost of living area just for the dating and nightlife. Make sure you have a job lined up that is paying considerably more than you're currently making or you may be in for a shock as it may cost considerably more than you're used to each month. I moved to Santa Monica after college and it was quite expensive. I sold my place and moved a few miles down the road to Marina del Rey, which is also pretty expensive. But I have an extra bedroom and decently more square footage for …
/r/seduction07/10/25 08:37 PM
1

That was what threw me off with much of the old PUA subculture, including a number of the "gurus." One of the old forums I remember was The Attraction Forums where Nick "Savoy" Benedict was their head guy. He seemed pretty nice, but it was obvious his natural comfort zone was being a competitive board game player and the kind of guy to hang out on weekends at his local comic book shop, not clubs or cruising for women, playing Warhammer with a bunch of what would pejoratively be considered a grou…
/r/seduction07/10/25 06:24 AM
-1

You shouldn't need a costume to start a conversation.
/r/seduction07/10/25 06:12 AM
6

I think I lost a few IQ points just reading this thread.
/r/seduction06/10/25 11:34 AM
3

Some guys do have women flock to them. The craziest example I can recall was this guy who was only like 5'5 and had women chasing him on a vacation I was on several years ago. But he had like 11/10 charisma and just had an aura about him where people wanted to listen and follow him around because he pretty much dictated the energy of the room, and he wasn't a loud guy or anything. Women were gossiping about him and trying to sleep with him the entire two week trip. But don't use outliers as gosp…
/r/seduction06/10/25 11:31 AM
0

Ignore her messages and move on.
/r/seduction06/10/25 01:12 AM
2

Talk to more people in general, not just women. It doesn't matter if it's a senior male. Regularly talk to a wide group of people and get the flow of natural conversation. Have small talk with all of your cashiers when you check out and there's not a long line. Talk to people in your vicinity while out. Just because it's a woman you find attractive should be irrelevant. Talk to everyone.
/r/seduction05/10/25 05:01 PM
0

Quit living on the internet and talk to most people in person, not online. You're probably like a lot of socially awkward shut-ins of the Gen Z era who are more conditioned for texting instead of speaking.
/r/seduction05/10/25 04:56 PM
12

State you're looking for casual. Be direct and there will be no confusion or wasted time.
/r/seduction05/10/25 04:55 PM
1

It's not a mistake to bring better clarity on the type of relationship she is looking to establish. At a minimum, you should always address your intentions if you're only wanting casual. Don't string anyone along and waste each other's time. Similarly, keep regular communication and continue to progress the relationship when you're both seeking long term. But also don't be afraid to end things if there are major unresolved red flags along the way.
/r/seduction05/10/25 07:16 AM
1

I think it's around 10% of all people (who don't have one). So most people do.
/r/seduction05/10/25 12:25 AM
1

Good photographers can help. But I'd say pay for a photography session moreso if you need the roll for your career to have business cards or a clean look for your website, etc. You can use one of them for dating profiles, but it may help to accompany it with a few more amateur style photos as well. Amateur photos in themselves are fine, too, as it may even be better to go in with lowered expectations for her. I've been on multiple dates where women used highly curated photos that made them look …
/r/seduction04/10/25 11:14 PM
6

Don't purposefully ignore people. But you're right to suggest you don't have to bring up her beauty at every turn. You can still comment on something like looks, just be graceful about it and don't wait for her reaction. Immediately move onto a new subject afterwards. That's part of being a gentleman. You can be nice and polite without fishing for validation or expecting any kind of results from it.
/r/seduction04/10/25 11:08 PM
0

Thanks for the laugh. I never was a fan of MM and your post highlights how disingenuous it was even for its time.
/r/seduction04/10/25 05:42 PM
11

Try to live in the moment without the routines. If you continue to reinforce bad habits then you'll become fully dependent on these corny scripted conversations. Be more observant and work at thinking on your feet so you can be more genuine and applicable to the woman you're speaking with.
/r/seduction04/10/25 05:36 PM
2

Whatever she wants to wear and whatever I want to wear.
/r/seduction04/10/25 04:54 PM
1

The Game is mostly a work of fiction from a professional writer who just happened to hang out with some guys like Mystery who thought they had a system for getting women into bed. Morals and ethics were out the window back then and much of the content from that era is highly outdated or never was something to follow at all. Neither Strauss nor Mystery and his lackeys were genuine in their pursuits as they used Mystery Method, an overly calculated system that Mystery adopted to manipulate through…
/r/seduction04/10/25 04:51 PM
1

You have to be yourself. Recognize that not everyone is alike and that's part of the human experience. Some people talk really slowly, some talk really quickly. Some are more quiet, others more boisterous. Whether you enjoy the dynamic is your call. My ex-wife is like OP describes. She's overly extroverted and animated, a woman who expresses every thought out loud. She'd whistle, sing and talk most thoughts out loud. She does not have an internal monologue; it's actually decently common as some …
/r/seduction04/10/25 04:39 PM
79

You can obviously still be a gentleman and be polite. The issue is guys who sacrifice their entire personality and core identity to be manipulative yes men in order to try to be what they think is her ideal man. They'll be afraid to be themselves and that's not a healthy way to interact with people. Women see through it.
/r/seduction04/10/25 04:32 PM
1

It's a new account with a flood of "content." Expect the sales pitches to become increasingly more aggressive with hard selling to check out videos, read an e-book, receive e-coaching and so forth, all by the OP, after there's an established presence in the sub and the guy tries to brand himself as a PUA "guru." There was another guy who recently did that and it looks like he may have been banned. Actually, the OP is already trying to redirect to his videos and use the sub as a branding opportun…
/r/seduction03/10/25 06:37 PM
80

Show genuine interest in her. Be a good listener and demonstrate that you're focused on her life and not her body.
/r/seduction03/10/25 06:34 PM
1

Indeed. It's not normal behavior to orchestrate a plan for a future event when he's not even currently in communication with her. That is borderline stalker behavior. If she had access to this thread to see his motives and premeditation, she would most likely not think it's cute but would instead be creeped out.
/r/seduction03/10/25 06:30 PM
1

I created a few test profiles back in the day to test some ideas I had and that was one of them. If she liked the profile, "hey" would work just fine in the sample selection i remember.
/r/seduction03/10/25 08:58 AM
1

You're still young. Have you considered therapy/treatment for your anxiety and depression? I don't say that to be a dick, but it may be worth tackling first. A woman in your life won't magically solve your mental health puzzle and may even make the situation worse.
/r/seduction03/10/25 08:53 AM
2

Be mindful of the "playful hitting." My ex-wife did that earlier on and I thought it was kind of strange but shrugged it off as her being overly extroverted/expressive. But it was just a boundary test. The playful hitting from her led to more aggressive things like pushing with more force until there was escalation to outright MMA-like violence. I still have physical and mental scars. It's just one of those things I take notice of now.
/r/seduction03/10/25 08:46 AM
2

The level of premeditation here is actually pretty creepy. Don't just ambush someone at an event you know she will be attending. You should have gotten her number instead of her Instagram.
/r/seduction03/10/25 08:33 AM
-2

Never used Instagram and it's never been brought up in conversation.
/r/seduction03/10/25 04:04 AM
4

Totally agree that if you're honest with yourself and to your potential date then you should have no regrets. I'd rather be authentic/congruent and be rejected than deceitful but get laid, etc. You always want to go into any potential relationship with an honest portrayal of yourself and not a caricature or otherwise false version of who you are. Since online dating was mentioned, you want to make absolutely certain that you also don't lie about common things men tend to lie about like age, heig…
/r/seduction02/10/25 08:29 PM
1

You don't have to exclusively use online dating. I'd say treat it as something like crypto where you put maybe 10% investment towards it. Perhaps you need to make it more clear early on that you're seeking a serious relationship. Also don't neglect shared interest meetup groups and social circle. It's extremely easy to transition into dating when you already both are really passionate about the same things. For example, I've dated multiple women through beach volleyball and rock climbing. And if…
/r/seduction02/10/25 07:54 PM
1

It's a ymmv thing. Basically you two just connect to the point where you'd like to see each other again and pursue a potential relationship. It doesn't always involve things like kissing or having sex early on as a pre-req. I've had multiple girlfriends where we didn't have sex for over a month and they were great girlfriends. It's usually the ones where sex happened a bit too early on that ended up being miserable experiences and there was less qualifying. But ymmv.
/r/seduction02/10/25 07:47 PM
24

Saying you don't like putting in effort or taking any initiative was likely a big turn off/dealbreaker.
/r/seduction02/10/25 04:45 PM
3

You're 27 years old, not 17. Just ask her out. I was already married and paying a mortgage at 27. You should have no problem with this.
/r/seduction02/10/25 04:24 AM
2

You can attract women just fine with "logical" conversations as billions of people have and continue to do for centuries now. Those recycled PUA era lines are extremely cringe.
/r/seduction01/10/25 09:06 PM
4

I'm almost 35 and so most women around this age are "hot moms" or however you want to describe it. That doesn't mean they will be easier to date or sleep around with. Many are quite confident and selective. I'd say very, very few women are cougars in the sense that this sub seems to think where women would just sleep with anyone a decade or more younger all willy nilly. Even as a guy, I don't like to hang out with women a decade younger than me.
/r/seduction01/10/25 05:58 PM
1

Anyone can, just as OP did. There are no qualifications other than anyone simply saying he/she is a "dating coach."
/r/seduction30/09/25 09:11 PM
1

Wear suits for my career but I tend to change before doing approaches because people tend to think if you're in a suit you're only approaching to sell them something. Nearly every time I've approached in the suit it'll be a very abrupt "not interested!" and then a hurried walk away. That doesn't happen when I'm not in a suit. This is in regards to street approaches.
/r/seduction30/09/25 08:57 PM
1

I went to them regularly from ages 21-23 and occasionally from 24-25. But the novelty really wore off by around 22. Far too loud, having to shoot to have conversation, etc. Plus I do not drink and don't like to date others who drink.
/r/seduction30/09/25 06:43 PM
1

I like SF but have lived in LA since college and am too acclimated to the warm weather to really be tempted elsewhere.
/r/seduction30/09/25 09:05 AM
1

You could always be direct and ask them over to your place if your goal is hanky panky that night. Just don't be deceptive of your intentions. Also realize people tend to drink at clubs; don't take advantage of or have sex with anyone who appears to be inebriated.
/r/seduction30/09/25 02:45 AM
1

Get her number and take the conversation offline. Then ask her.
/r/seduction30/09/25 02:42 AM
1

Ymmv. I prefer more basic conversation before a first date. At least a five minute phone call before the first date usually is a pretty good sweetspot. I no longer do online dating/apps, but I might up the conversation time in that scenario before the first date as there's been no previous human interaction beyond texting, which doesn't really count.
/r/seduction30/09/25 02:37 AM
9

They're your female friends. Tell them you've been going on dates and haven't found the right woman yet and ask about their dating life. Then ask about who they know is single and looking. Women don't mind being matchmakers. Plus they love the gossip anyway. Just make it clear you aren't looking to try to date your primary friends, aka the ones who are already your friends.
/r/seduction29/09/25 07:56 PM
13

The risk would be trying to pursue your female friends, not their female friends they're introducing you to.
/r/seduction29/09/25 07:53 PM
2

That would be highly illegal nearly everywhere in the US unless by "your massage therapist" you meant your girlfriend/wife during your free time at home.
/r/seduction29/09/25 07:50 PM
2

Don't worry about their body count and don't ask or assume.
/r/seduction29/09/25 07:48 PM
21

At a minimum, you already have close female friends. Have them introduce you to single women they know. That's how I met my current girlfriend.
/r/seduction29/09/25 07:46 PM
388

6: He creates a new spam account on Reddit and posts lengthy blogs instead of trying to date.
/r/seduction29/09/25 07:38 PM
1

It should be easier than ever on a college campus. This current Gen Z generation is full of guys afraid of their own shadow. Many students live there, are bored, and have tons of free time. Don't worry about the content, just get a conversation started and grab her number. Approaches are tougher after college since you're outside of that college bubble and people have actual lives and real problems to deal with. Plus, anyone approaching is also assumed to be someone either asking for money or tr…
/r/seduction29/09/25 05:58 PM
1

Her ghosting you is a passive aggressive way to say she's not interested without having to actually tell you. It sucks, but you have to also realize that you shouldn't be trying to date anyone who doesn't want to date you.
/r/seduction28/09/25 11:49 PM
1

Boo hoo. I'd call them anyway. Anyone who can't handle a telephone conversation is not worth dating.
/r/seduction28/09/25 11:41 PM
2

Most people now don't answer the phone for unknown numbers. So I'll usually text first to say that I'm calling. It generally works better for preventing flaking since there's a human element.
/r/seduction28/09/25 11:37 PM
3

Don't play games. Continue to develop your identity without the need to compromise your integrity. You're only 18.
/r/seduction28/09/25 11:09 PM
3

Delete the app. Messaging random women on social media is peak Gen Z terminally online illness.
/r/seduction28/09/25 06:45 PM
1

I'll assume you might be really young or just dating younger women. I faced similar issues the times I went on dates with women younger than 26 or so. Buried in phones, half focused and not invested in conversation. Plus they were broke, depended on parents, had minimal emotional maturity, and no real clue how the real world operates, etc.
/r/seduction28/09/25 06:41 PM
1

Unlikely.
/r/seduction28/09/25 06:35 PM
1

Are you even getting her talking and getting to know her?
/r/seduction28/09/25 03:46 AM
1

Be honest of your intentions.
/r/seduction27/09/25 08:39 PM
2

Simple things like "please," "thank you," "I'm sorry," "you were right," "I was wrong." You won't realize how much you miss hearing phrases like that after being in a toxic relationship. My ex-wife has BPD and the constant projecting, gaslighting and so forth will break you down.
/r/seduction27/09/25 08:34 PM
-1

Talk to women like fellow human beings. Quit this whole Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus kind of divide. Be curious and try to find middle ground.
/r/seduction27/09/25 08:32 PM
1

Ymmv. I got the most dates through professional headshot type photos as the main picture. I'm a business guy and already had them from business card shoots, etc. But I also had some clearly less professional photos to balance it out. If you're going to go with stereotypical tropes like hanging off a rock wall, holding a dog, sitting on a motorcycle or whatever then only do it because they're congruent with your lifestyle. In those examples, it'd be because you're an active climber, the photograp…
/r/seduction27/09/25 08:14 PM
1

It may take more reps with the same person. Many people find that the first few times with a new partner may not be home runs because you're still mostly strangers and there's no real emotional bond yet. It generally improves with time as you both grow more comfortable, relaxed and learn each other's nuances.
/r/seduction26/09/25 10:41 PM
5

Aim for one good woman and you're all set.
/r/seduction26/09/25 10:36 PM
1

Totally agree with OP. I had a few really good female friends in my mid 20s before I got married. I hung out with them quite a bit and it was relaxing. I learned a lot from them and they were fun to be around. Now I have a few female "friends" that are more associates from my volleyball and rock climbing groups. In other words, we don't really hang out outside of those groups. I definitely miss having a solid group of female friends to shoot the breeze with.
/r/seduction26/09/25 06:35 PM
2

If you have to double or triple text her and she's still distant, don't bother. Move on.
/r/seduction26/09/25 05:45 AM
0

"Positive response" is a pretty wide open and subjective thing. If you see concerning red flags like her getting angry over mundane things early on, then you need to to pay very close attention if you pursue more dates. Have a good time but also spend time getting to know her and texting her behavior. But if you're talking more about her playing games and not wanting to commit to going on a date, then move on.
/r/seduction26/09/25 05:40 AM
0

Try engaging people out of a genuine curiosity. You can comment on style or really about anything you find interesting. Don't be outcome dependent with the interactions. Just enjoy the conversations and be at peace whatever the outcome. If she tells you she has a boyfriend or to get lost, that's fine. Move along. But you'll find someone who will enjoy your approach.
/r/seduction26/09/25 05:36 AM
1

Ask her, not Reddit.
/r/seduction26/09/25 05:32 AM
10

Flirt back in that scenario.
/r/seduction26/09/25 05:32 AM
2

If it affects you personally, phone away in pocket and silent mode at all times when out unless you're expecting an important call/text. If you're on a date with a woman who won't get off her phone, then you're free to speak up about it. I definitely miss the days when phones were "dumber." I'll take the occasional old rap ring tones in public from back in the day versus everyone buried in screens like digital zombies.
/r/seduction26/09/25 05:16 AM
3

Do it because you genuinely want to share with the world, not as some kind of goofy dating tactic.
/r/seduction26/09/25 05:13 AM
5

You say that like it's a bad thing.
/r/seduction26/09/25 05:11 AM
2

I don't use Instagram and it's never been a hindrance to get dates.
/r/seduction25/09/25 05:09 AM
1

This has to be satire.
/r/seduction25/09/25 03:28 AM
3

"PUA" is long dead and for good reason. A small subset of folks come across the old folklore and try to resurrect it, however naive they may be. As for quality women to date, there's no shortage. Trying to meet people during the day can be really tough as those are standard work hours for most adults. People are busy during the daytime. That obviously doesn't mean everyone, but in general the daytime hours I'm used to seeing housewives and senior citizens outside of lunch hours. Not a ton of you…
/r/seduction25/09/25 03:04 AM
1

The dental point is an interesting one. I also know some guys who got veneers and their dating success skyrocketed. Was it the teeth themselves? Doubtful. It was the confidence of them being less self conscious going out and thus their anxiety significantly lowered.
/r/seduction24/09/25 05:35 PM
1

It can be a slow escalation with BPD. On some level, they're aware they have a bad temper. But they also think on black and white terms like other people are all good or all bad. So they might be more neutral earlier on to not stir conflict. And they may over-mirror your interests to seem more compatible. But over time, they'll get more comfortable. They won't respect boundaries. Normal boundaries don't apply to these kinds of people as they see them as betrayal. And with someone who has BPD, yo…
/r/seduction24/09/25 05:17 PM
3

Spot on. Questions are necessary as a form of getting to know someone. PUA guys seem terrified of looking needy by asking questions and think you have to reframe into a statement. It's almost like fragile Gen Z kids who are afraid to use a question mark when texting because they think it looks too aggressive. Just ask questions like a normal person while being a good active listener. The key is to ask relevant ones of an ongoing conversation. Obviously if you're erratic and are all over the plac…
/r/seduction24/09/25 05:06 PM
1

The ones I know are usually entrepreneurs of various trades and guys with real estate holdings, like multi-unit buildings with consistent tenants. I've also known a few real estate agents who make obscene money, but they're selling houses over $5 million and so their cut really adds up each time.
/r/seduction24/09/25 06:25 AM
1

I was speaking more for guys who make well over $500k/yr. Around $500k/yr would probably be around top 5% and around a million for top 1%. That's an incredible amount of money. Obviously money can make you appear more accomplished, stable and desirable to women. I don't know what else you're trying to look into. Interpretations of "lots of money" is also subjective. I don't know many people who earn over a million a year. The guys I know at that level are usually entrepreneurs of some kind and g…
/r/seduction24/09/25 05:21 AM
1

This is the way. Listen, let her talk and ask follow-ups. Be a curious person. You don't always have to follow the framework of existing conversations. You're obviously free to bounce topics. You shouldn't have to put much thought into this. Definitely don't pre-plan or script anything out. You want to have natural conversations just as you would with friends and others. If you're enjoying the moment and the process of getting to know her, then you should be able to relax and free flow. If you'r…
/r/seduction24/09/25 05:08 AM
1

Befriend more women. They make the best wingpersons and tend to like to introduce people if they trust you. I met my current girlfriend this way through a mutual friend.
/r/seduction24/09/25 05:05 AM
1

Not a fan of approaching at the gym.
/r/seduction24/09/25 05:02 AM
15

It's a complicated question. Sure, money helps a guy get dates. But you also have to factor if she actually likes you or is just enamored by the potential of a lavish lifestyle. I live in the LA area where there are a lot of really rich people. I felt like one of the poorest people in Santa Monica. There are so many multi-millionaires and obviously not all are from the entertainment industries. The guys I know who earn say over $750k/yr tend to either date other women with money or they'll downp…
/r/seduction24/09/25 04:58 AM
4

If women are mentally ill, they will most likely treat you badly whether you have money or not. My ex-wife tried to hide her behavior for a while but eventually she was a miserable asshole 24/7 to the point where I didn't feel safe around her. Her co-workers were pretty much all afraid of her temper and she bounced from job to job; she always blamed it on everyone else.
/r/seduction24/09/25 04:47 AM
4

It could be any variety of things. She may be talking to or dating other guys and she doesn't see you as her first choice or boyfriend material. You may have moved too quickly and there's no genuine connection.
/r/seduction23/09/25 09:12 PM
-1

Don't walk up to a stranger and say she looks like the type to form a cult, even jokingly. Some of these replies sound like old PUA satire.
/r/seduction23/09/25 06:18 PM
11

Emotional intimacy is a good way to describe it. A good partner should elevate most aspects of your life and vice versa, including your sex life. People on this sub seem to see the sub name and think "seduction" is just learning how to be a Hugh Hefner type, but I see it as more of how to be a more confident and complete guy, both physically and emotionally, while not letting it affect your work/life balance and without any sacrifices to your natural personality. As you said, too many guys are m…
/r/seduction23/09/25 05:24 PM
1

A "good seducer" is pretty vague and open to interpretation. I value it more as a mindset that continues even into marriage with your wife.
/r/seduction23/09/25 04:31 AM
1

Don't engage with her and definitely don't make advances on women if they have a boyfriend. It doesn't matter if you're an ex or not.
/r/seduction23/09/25 04:27 AM
1

It's likely unorthodox/uncommon. Even as a 34 year old guy, I have 0% interest in 19 year old women.
/r/seduction23/09/25 04:26 AM
2

I think the problem was generally that in the PUA era, guys were encouraging each other to adopt personas and the pickup communities would literally copy them verbatim. You'd have accountants suddenly trying to act like Tyler Durden from Fight Club or Maverick from Top Gun and then they wonder what went wrong when women see through their ruse. Or they'd just copy Mystery's style when their personality is nothing like his. Unfortunately, some of those old tropes continue on through folklore and g…
/r/seduction23/09/25 04:20 AM
69

My hookup days were when I was around 18-22. Being a student athlete and in a fraternity definitely helped. I guess I'm an old soul by Southern California standards and moved onto LTRs after undergrad. Meaningless sex just did nothing for me without the emotional bond and journey of a relationship. The few guys I know who are trying to be ageing players in their say mid 30s and beyond generally will have women come to them as they have money and status.
/r/seduction23/09/25 04:09 AM
1

Edit and just add a non-wordy summary at the very bottom.
/r/seduction23/09/25 03:59 AM
2

You might need to add a Tl;dr.
/r/seduction22/09/25 01:24 AM
2

Be more clear that you are looking for a quick fling instead of trying to dance around it with calculated conversational topics. You also don't have to pay $60 to $100 per date. You're allowed to just go on a walk or talk on park benches, etc. Free dates are fine if you communicate ahead of time. If you're a college kid, it's expected you'll have limited finances.
/r/seduction21/09/25 09:54 PM
1

People reflect on dates after they end. Just because you kissed, held hands or even had sex doesn't mean she sees you as boyfriend material. You have to realize she's probably talking or going on dates with multiple guys. I've also been on dates and then decided to not pursue a second date even if we kissed, etc. But these days I'll generally hold off on physical unless I'm really sensing she's someone I could make my girlfriend.
/r/seduction21/09/25 08:28 PM
4

This is the only correct response. You be honest and upfront of your intentions and then respect the outcome if she does not want a casual fling.
/r/seduction21/09/25 08:24 PM
1

I don't use dating apps.
/r/seduction21/09/25 08:22 PM
13

Probably the most charismatic non-celeb guy I've ever seen in person was a guy on our vacation trip a few years ago who was only around 5'5 in shoes. I'm 5'11 barefoot and he nearly looked like a dwarf next to me and I'm not even that tall. Women would ask me what they needed to do to get his attention. Some short guys have insane aura.
/r/seduction21/09/25 08:20 PM
1

Yeah, I play beach volleyball as a byproduct of living around Santa Monica for years. Several times I've asked other players if they are on their high school team as friendly small talk, not to hit on them, when they're actually like 22. At this point as I'm almost 35, most early 20s people still look and act like high schoolers. My brain hurts even being around them talking in constant fragmented texting speak.
/r/seduction20/09/25 06:56 PM
1

She gave you her number and you kissed. Do you want to date her? Just because you had a conversation about her being a parent is not some kind of blunder. It's normal human behavior to be empathetic of others. She is almost 40 and not a brainrotted Tik Tok Gen Z'er. Her denying advances beyond kissing is also normal and even potentially a good sign. Do you really want a woman who's that easy to give in to sex with every stranger she meets on the first day?
/r/seduction20/09/25 05:16 PM
1

You may be coming on too strongly and weirding these women out. Slow down. Show an actual natural/genuine interest in them. If you come off like a thirsty horndog, then it'll likely show in your demeanor. Speak to them like normal human beings.
/r/seduction20/09/25 05:10 PM
1

In that scenario? He moved to NYC. It's the most walkable area of the US with consistently high foot traffic. You have no excuse to not get out and talk to others.
/r/seduction20/09/25 04:13 PM
3

Because you'll actually be talking to women and can showcase your personality instead of simply be getting scroll-rejected. That's pretty sad and is not an honest effort. Even if you do make it past the swipe wall, texting is too impersonal and dry of a conversational medium. Texting is more for when she is your girlfriend and you know each other's nuances.
/r/seduction20/09/25 02:32 AM
5

I've posted about it several times, but one of the most bizarre ones I've seen was a guy who was part of our vacation group a few years ago. He was only about 5'5 with blonde hair and average build. It wasn't a celeb or any type of influencer, etc. He had a presence that was tough to describe without seeing in person. Basically, just the guy being around elevated the energy in the room and everyone stopped to listen when he'd speak. People would follow him around. If he laughed, others would lau…
/r/seduction20/09/25 02:27 AM
-3

Delete the apps, turn your phone off, and walk outside. There are women in the real world. I promise.
/r/seduction20/09/25 02:16 AM
4

No kidding. This sub has a warped view on women outside their demographic. Unless it's a cougar who isn't picky, it'll likely be similar rejection rates as women you'd otherwise hit on. Maybe even a higher rejection rate as OP is only 23. Even as a guy who's 34, I wouldn't date or otherwise pursue a 23 year old woman.
/r/seduction20/09/25 02:11 AM
2

Maybe for undergrad college aged Gen Z. But beyond that, no one will recognize you unless you're really prominent like MrBeast. I live in LA and am oblivious to nearly every influencer and there are so many around here. The majority of social media "stars" have kid and teen audiences. The few times I've met supposedly big time influencers (several million subs), through someone I know, I'd never seen anyone so insecure to people not knowing who they were. Those folks spend well over 12+ hours a …
/r/seduction19/09/25 06:18 PM
1

Focus on trying to get to know her first to gauge whether or not you'd like to see her again and build towards a relationship. It sounds like you just want to skip straight to the finish line without any effort.
/r/seduction19/09/25 06:17 PM
0

You do also realize that platforms like Instagram don't necessarily paint an accurate picture of people's lives, right? People content farm to show the highlight reels or to just showboat in general. I'm in LA and you can't really walk anywhere without running into Gen Z'ers who are on the prowl all day looking for locations to take photos for "the gram."
/r/seduction19/09/25 01:18 AM
1

That's not an excuse to whine about it. I live in LA and know some people who make obscene amounts of money, around a million/yr. Is it big time celeb or NBA superstar type money? No. But it's more than 95+% of all doctors, for example, and these guys will get some pursuits from women who know their status. That's life.
/r/seduction19/09/25 01:10 AM
32

It's how I met my current girlfriend. She's a career professional with student debts paid off, owns her own house, doesn't party, has good gym and diet routines and so forth at 31. This was a huge departure from the 20-somethings I went on dates with from apps who were broke, partied, relied on their parents, and had really weird/unrealistic views of how the real world works.
/r/seduction18/09/25 07:28 PM
-5

Focus on finding a girlfriend and you'll have frequent sex.
/r/seduction18/09/25 07:24 PM
8

You were already interested in her. If she's also interested, then you're on the right track. But ditch the IG. Quit thinking like a stereotypical Gen Z kid who lives online. Get her phone number.
/r/seduction18/09/25 07:22 PM
3

I mean, sure. It also obviously applies to women dating men or men dating men. This sub is overwhelmingly filled with men dating women. But you get the idea.
/r/seduction18/09/25 05:18 PM
0

OP is apparently only 24. You have time to work on yourself. It's far more important than dating right now. Get in a good mental space.
/r/seduction18/09/25 07:47 AM
22

Don't take on the persona of anyone else but yourself.
/r/seduction18/09/25 07:43 AM
11

I'll speak on more serious events that many guys will face. Repeated emotional abuse, walk away. Tell her you don't want to be treated that way and you two can't function as a couple if there's not mutual respect. If a date/partner makes a pattern of regularly putting you down, gaslighting, and so forth then you need to move on before it gets worse with more frequent verbal abuse and she escalates to violence. After any signs of physical violence, walk away immediately and do not engage ever aga…
/r/seduction18/09/25 07:24 AM
3

It sounds like you may need to work on yourself a bit. Some people do generally like the situation you describe, Henry Rollins being a random outlier example of a lifelong true lone wolf. But humans are social creatures with even most introverts finding a partner to live with and/or marry. You're going to get older and likely will want more from your life than being the perpetually single guy from your group. Your opportunities are going to dwindle the older you get with no desire to be in relat…
/r/seduction18/09/25 07:09 AM
7

I've had multiple LTRs including a marriage. There were times when I did hook-ups in college, though that is not my style. I rarely even look back on hook-ups. I've been divorced for almost three years. But guess what? I'm back in the saddle and in another LTR. Life goes on. I enjoy the journey of relationships. There are expected ups and downs along the way. It's perfectly normal to experience challenges; no relationship is conflict-free. It sounds like you're one-dimensional in your thinking a…
/r/seduction18/09/25 06:25 AM
-4

That's a pretty bad excuse. If owning a cell phone is that much of a distress, then you shouldn't own one or should consider a basic phone with only call and text.
/r/seduction17/09/25 10:13 PM
1

Don't stalk women on their socials.
/r/seduction17/09/25 10:02 PM
1

That's pretty much all you have to do. Treat anyone's family with respect. They could be your future in-laws.
/r/seduction17/09/25 09:59 PM
8

Step outside of the house and actually talk to real women.
/r/seduction17/09/25 09:56 PM
1

Malls are usually filled with teens, families and seniors. It's not a place I'd do cold approach.
/r/seduction17/09/25 01:13 AM
0

After being ghosted, no. He should bow out with dignity intact.
/r/seduction16/09/25 09:57 PM
1

I'd just move on.
/r/seduction16/09/25 09:56 PM
1

No, we're past the PUA era.
/r/seduction16/09/25 08:11 PM
2

Much of the old PUA movement was cult mantra. Guys pretty much all built a new persona where they all acted alike, dressed alike and talked in the same coded language from Mystery Method. You could go on any dating site and flip the search settings to women seeking men and the PUA guys would stick out like sore thumbs as they all had the same cliche trope profiles and were basically PUA hipsters with no originality. A decent chunk of that old scene was incel types from the bodybuilding misc foru…
/r/seduction16/09/25 04:56 PM
2

Regular dates greatly help even during marriage. Plus, you really need someone you're compatible with and can easily communicate with, not just chit chat type banter but also relationship goals, boundaries, arguments/conflicts and so forth. Guys need to spend more time qualifying her overall personality and less time worrying about the best sex partner. I had a great partner for sex throughout my marriage but was miserable because I overlooked many red flags and didn't realize she had BPD. She g…
/r/seduction16/09/25 04:36 PM
2

As a guy, It's not my thing on day one and I highly doubt "most women" want it on day one.
/r/seduction16/09/25 04:31 PM
15

Remove Instagram.
/r/seduction16/09/25 02:32 AM
1

To most people it is. I live "in LA" but have not lived in the city itself, just LA County. I moved to Santa Monica after college and lived there through my marriage. I moved to Marina del Rey for a neighborhood change and also because I found a great deal for cheaper and more square footage than I could find in Santa Monica while still having qualities I love like being on the water and a laid back atmosphere. Most people tell other people outside of LA that they live "in LA" as there are so ma…
/r/seduction15/09/25 08:57 PM
1

It's a ymmv situation. Some will just wait the week out with minimal or no contact, others may chat throughout the week and so forth. There's no real right or wrong answer. I generally find a call before meeting up is better than a text as there's more of a human component and there tends to be lower chances of last minute flaking. Newer generations don't pick up their phones when it rings and so you might have to text first with a heads up that you're calling.
/r/seduction15/09/25 08:38 PM
1

You need to come up with these on your own. Ask questions that you're legitimately curious to know about her. Try to get her to tell stories and you can build off them through active listening and follow-ups. Don't you want to know more about the person you're going on a date with and could end up being your girlfriend?
/r/seduction15/09/25 08:33 PM
4

The hairline is beyond your control, so don't dwell on it and don't demonstrate to others that it bothers you. Focus on what you do have control over. Spend less time online. Get in better shape. You already have solid things like a good paying job and height can help as well. I'm 5'11 barefoot and tell everyone I'm exactly that even when I could pass for 6' to 6'1 in shoes, and it's kind of funny because I've heard more than once from women that I'm taller than the "6 foot" ex; be confident wit…
/r/seduction15/09/25 01:51 AM
1

Your point of "because they can get away with it" is key. These types are constantly validated and fawned over their looks. Women and men both are telling them they're "so pretty" all the time. They seem to skate through life without repercussions. People are much, much more forgiving of overly attractive people. Speeding all the time? No problem; a warning every time. Underqualified for the job? No problem; the male hiring manager thinks you're hot. Cheating on your partner? No problem; he's af…
/r/seduction14/09/25 08:30 PM
0

I'd also use a phone number every time as well. Luckily no woman I've dated has ever mentioned IG.
/r/seduction14/09/25 05:21 PM
0

Odd response. I'm in my 30s and am dating a mature woman who is also in her 30s; that's after going on multiple dates with immature women in their 20s.
/r/seduction14/09/25 05:19 PM
14

Come up with your own and learn to think for yourself.
/r/seduction14/09/25 08:25 AM
2

Maybe some luck, but I met my current girlfriend through social circle and I'm not some high status celeb. There are a ton of guys in LA with money and status. It was particularly easy because the introduction was through a shared friend this woman is friends with; the woman who is now my girlfriend has known her a while. So any uneasiness, she probably just talked privately with our mutual friend to ask questions. There was a ton of stuff to talk about on our dates just based on our shared frie…
/r/seduction14/09/25 01:39 AM
30

Until you hit a pothole.
/r/seduction13/09/25 10:43 PM
2

No one should be purposefully aloof for gamesmanship. Neediness is a ymmv subjectivity. Read the room and how the person responds to your communication style/frequency and so forth. You don't have to respond to texts immediately if you're busy. But you also don't have to intentionally ignore. Communicate these things with a current or potential future partner. You can say you're a talker and like to call/text or that you prefer to keep most communication to in person. Not everyone has similar en…
/r/seduction13/09/25 08:55 PM
2

Ymmv. I don't even really think back on hook-ups. They're like empty calories where it might work in a pinch but otherwise it's just a fleeting thing with no lasting emotional impact. If anything, I mostly just reflect on how I could've done things differently in relationships or pursued certain people for a relationship when I was too afraid to do so. Or rejected women that I should have. Staying out until 4am partying is pretty atypical for people over 30. I'd be extremely tired doing that as …
/r/seduction13/09/25 08:30 PM
6

Going out alone is obviously fine as is going to clubs. Though I ditched bars and clubs by around age 25 and haven't missed them at all. I also was in a relationship for several years (married) and divorced at 32. I took a full year off to rest, regroup, focus on work, and so forth. Plus the divorce was pretty nasty as she stalled and dragged it out. At 30+ you might consider places that don't serve alcohol so you can talk with women in a fully sober state. One thing I've realized in my 30s is w…
/r/seduction13/09/25 05:30 PM
1

Marketing/branding. They're both PUA fluff from a different era. Mystery Method had more money behind its release as it was coming off the momentum of The Game, which was a best selling novel where Mystery was a central character. It was almost like the spin off like Snoop on Doggystyle after Dre propelled him to superstardom on The Chronic. People forget that Neil Strauss was already a well established author before The Game while Mystery was just a guy who posted on newsgroups and forums until…
/r/seduction13/09/25 04:09 PM
2

Just be direct and honest of your intentions early on. Don't waste anyone's time regardless of where you meet the woman.
/r/seduction13/09/25 04:07 PM
23

While not scientific by any means, universal 10s tend to be extremely crazy/mentally ill. And if you haven't seen it yet, she's probably hiding it or it'll be a slow trickle through an escalation ladder of boundary tests. I used to laugh at the Hot Crazy Matrix until I started finding there was some anecdotal truth to it. My ex-wife is still among the hottest women I've ever talked to, but she became violent to the point where I could no longer be alone with her as her anger was explosive and sh…
/r/seduction13/09/25 02:21 AM
58

Some people just have that presence. A guy on our vacation a few years ago was like that. I'm 5'11 barefoot and this guy looked to be around 5'5 even in shoes, but he was the center of attention everywhere I saw him. Women were actively competing for him. I remember sitting in the hot tub and women were talking to each other and asking why that guy doesn't like them. He had an aura where people would listen, follow him around, or talk about him even when he wasn't around.
/r/seduction12/09/25 08:30 PM
5

If she apologizes and attempts to reschedule, one more chance is generally fine. People have lives outside of going on dates, though you also want to respect others' time. If she flakes again, move on and delete her number. If you do reschedule and she shows up, you can let her know that your time is important and she needs to be more aware of her schedule. It might sound aggressive, but it's a boundary that you may need to establish early. However, I'll also say this. You met her at a club. Let…
/r/seduction12/09/25 08:09 PM
2

Pace yourself. Get to know her and qualify before trying to become a horndog. Let the dates breathe and progress.
/r/seduction12/09/25 08:07 PM
1

You likely won't. There are plenty of others out there.
/r/seduction12/09/25 07:47 PM
4

Most people don't memorize and rehearse routines for dating. That's just old PUA marketing lore. You have to be genuine in your curiosity of meeting a new person, along with staying congruent to your natural self. If you end up being performative and start drifting into a persona, your act will fall apart and you'll be a miserable shell of yourself. Practice thinking on your feet, not performing rehearsed material.
/r/seduction12/09/25 11:17 AM
1

As simple as it sounds, one moment at a time. Also keep in mind many people out there don't have an internal monologue/inner voice. Be a better listener and it'll give you time to slow down and focus on what's going on.
/r/seduction12/09/25 11:06 AM
3

Damn, dude. That is one of the reasons so many guys end up staying with their partner. They threaten suicide so often and I still took it seriously and did my best to try to make peace. Their suicide rate is like 10% which is just insanely high, more than any other disorder from what I can tell. Luckily my ex rebounded and got remarried. Multiple times I wanted to reach out to her guy and warn him but stayed fully no contact as it'd be weird for an ex to reach out, plus I wanted no engagement wi…
/r/seduction11/09/25 10:03 PM
5

That looks similar to my case. I actually dated multiple volleyball players as I played quite a bit when I was in Santa Monica. Not my ex but same story otherwise. She went absolutely ape shit and demanded a straight up audit of my social media friends (only the women, of course) and she ended up deleting like 90%+ of the women, even if they were hundreds or over a thousand miles away. If they were attractive, poof. Gone. The constant manipulation, threats etc was so tiring. She also progressed …
/r/seduction11/09/25 09:44 PM
1

Don't do it.
/r/seduction11/09/25 05:55 PM
1

Ignore that and use a condom every time.
/r/seduction11/09/25 05:53 PM
2

I'm a business owner and so handshakes upon meeting are normal greetings from me. It may not work for everyone, but I do them out of instinct and no one's ever reacted negatively that I could tell.
/r/seduction11/09/25 05:49 PM
2

That was me for a number of years. I actually had a routine where I'd pitch the idea of going on a date at 6am and it actually worked. I think women were so intrigued by the idea that they went along with it at the time and it was nice to be able to get a morning hike, breakfast and so forth.
/r/seduction11/09/25 05:42 PM
2

Some solid points there. Definitely don't overlook red flags and women who treat you badly. If she's really hot, you might just think she's being a challenge or is a little fiery. She may in fact be mentally ill. That's how my ex-wife was. Most of her actions were to push boundaries so she could manipulate, and if she didn't get her desired outcome she would either get emotionally abusive or she'd get physically violent. You don't want to get to that stage. Observe for red flags and value respec…
/r/seduction11/09/25 12:10 PM
1

You just have to accept some women will flake on you. Maybe she doesn't feel fully comfortable with you or senses incongruencies. Maybe she can't picture you might be the kind of boyfriend she wants. Maybe she's talking to multiple guys and is just casually keeping in touch with you as a distant back-up. You may never know. Just do your thing and don't get rattled by flaking.
/r/seduction11/09/25 12:04 PM
26

That's how it was with my ex-wife. If I'd talk to other people while we were out and leave her be for a few minutes, guys would often try to pick her up. She got hit on a good bit and also had male orbiters at her work. She was mentally ill with BPD and that was one of her ways to manipulate was pointing out how she could easily find someone else. Many women do get propositioned fairly often.
/r/seduction11/09/25 11:58 AM
1

It's my goal as well. I was married before but rushed to marry the wrong one. I own up to that and am trying again.
/r/seduction11/09/25 11:51 AM
1

Wear a condom every time you have sex. No, they won't fully protect against every STI out there but it's about as good as you can do other than abstinence. It's too bad you don't want a relationship because in one you likely would be having sex very frequently with the same person.
/r/seduction11/09/25 11:48 AM
1

It's all over the map if you live in LA. I don't have any entertainment industry friends with decent status, but I know some people in fields like real estate who are making insane money.
/r/seduction10/09/25 10:29 PM
3

That's fair. I moved to Santa Monica after college and there are some really, really rich people around. Some you'd never know they have money. It's the dumb, young influencer types who go over the top to try to prove they've made it and they're a dime a dozen in LA. If you go to places and demand free food/products or whatever because "bro, I can give you a shout-out" you're a total tool.
/r/seduction10/09/25 08:16 PM
7

The really wealthy guys I know (say close to a million a year or more in California) tend to either date other women with money or they'll downplay their wealth if she's not coming from money to gauge if she's a gold digger. Plenty of really rich guys purposefully drive junker cars anyway because it's an asset that loses money and also because people with actual money don't have to prove they're rich.
/r/seduction10/09/25 08:07 PM
5

Use your brain to make decisions, not your wiener.
/r/seduction10/09/25 06:23 PM
1

It happens to everyone. She could have reflected on it and changed her mind for any number of reasons. Just because you got physical doesn't mean interest will remain going forward. She may not see you as boyfriend material. Some women are terrible at communicating, or just don't want any confrontation, and so it's easier and lower stress for them to just ghost.
/r/seduction10/09/25 04:39 PM
1

Whatever you want. I'm a business owner and dress in formal attire when I'm meeting with clients. But just going out I don't mind more casual attire. I even wear sandals a lot and shorts most of the year since it's Southern California. You do you.
/r/seduction10/09/25 08:17 AM
3

Probably the most interesting factor is that both of you are nontraditional college students in your 30s and 40s. When I was in undergrad, at least, the 30+ year old students were treated like zoo animals. People kept their distance, observed from afar, mocked them, and so forth. To answer your question, though, just talk to her and shift the conversation beyond school. You guys ideally aren't the usual 18-22 Gen Z kids who are afraid of their own shadow.
/r/seduction10/09/25 08:11 AM
1

Height is generally more critical online. I'm 5'11 barefoot and listed 5'11 on all sites/apps and so some women rejected me for not being "6 ft+" and that's fine. I'd rather the shallow ones weed themselves out. I'm 34 and generally date +/- 5 years within my age with my current girlfriend being 31. Women don't seem to make it quite as limiting of a criteria offline. I've even been rejected for guys several inches shorter.
/r/seduction10/09/25 08:04 AM
2

Soft/non-confrontational rejection is pretty spot on.
/r/seduction09/09/25 02:12 AM
2

They're seeing you as fairly low interest compared to their options. Chances are she's talking to multiple guys and is only putting in the bare minimum effort to maintain small talk with guys lower down the totem pole as back-ups. It happens.
/r/seduction08/09/25 08:41 PM
9

Try other places where women will be sober. Also, sober up yourself. You want both of you to talk without substances ruining the experience.
/r/seduction08/09/25 07:22 PM
2

Are you like 12? He often used "tactics" like walking with a fake cast on his arm or would pretend to walk in crutches to get women to assist him. Then he'd bludgeon them with a weapon and take them to another location. Or he'd outright break into sororities.
/r/seduction08/09/25 07:19 PM
2

Asking questions to spark a genuine curiosity. Also slowing down speech.
/r/seduction08/09/25 05:48 PM
3

Worst analogy ever. Bundy stalked people, assaulted or drugged them, then violently r*'d and murdered them. Awful, evil stuff.
/r/seduction08/09/25 04:24 PM
5

35+ is basically a senior citizen among 18-22 year olds on campus. I remember even in my later years of grad school in my 20s I'd sit around in empty classrooms on the undergrad side of campus to study so I wouldn't run into people I know and students would always say "sorry, sir. I didn't mean to walk in on you, professor" or something to that degree even as I sat there in regular old casual clothes, not anything remotely formal attire. Anyone in their 30s walking around an undergrad campus who…
/r/seduction08/09/25 04:13 PM
1

Don't worry about it. I'm 5'11" barefoot and have been rejected over height when I used online dating because I was honest and didn't list 6 foot and ran into some shallow divas. I've also been rejected where women I've pursued went for a guy shorter than me. It's no big deal. Do your own thing and quit worrying about variables outside of your control.
/r/seduction08/09/25 08:28 AM
1

Local word of mouth, Facebook, etc. It's total YMMV. I'm in Southern California where these kinds of activities have many people, but it could obviously differ based on demand/location for your hobbies of choice.
/r/seduction08/09/25 02:54 AM
1

Join groups you're either already interested in or genuinely want to learn. For me, it was volleyball and rock climbing. Ymmv. Join them for the activities and not with any expectations of finding dates.
/r/seduction08/09/25 12:24 AM
5

This has to be satire.
/r/seduction07/09/25 10:07 PM
7

Don't get with married women if the married woman is not your wife. If you're married, don't get with any women that are not your wife. Also, if you're married and cheat on your wife, it can really complicate your inevitable divorce when she finds out and there's evidence to support it such as phone logs, etc.
/r/seduction07/09/25 08:29 PM
3

OLD = online dating. I fully agree in not wanting to engage women when they're not fully sober. I don't go to bars or clubs anymore and that's a huge reason behind it. I would not date a woman who drinks, smokes/vapes, or does drugs.
/r/seduction07/09/25 07:41 PM
1

Some of the womanizer types I knew growing up tended to be fat frat types. Plenty of women like a confident fat guy. Most of them tended to be baseball players and so they were definitely fat, a bit obese even, but tended to play a sport. Money obviously greatly helps if you're obese.
/r/seduction07/09/25 06:23 PM
1

Early 20s playing PUA type games when I could've just been myself and found a great relationship. I learned to be congruent, always be honest with women, and that vulnerabilities are human nature.
/r/seduction07/09/25 06:20 PM
2

I'm pretty close in age to OP, 34, and my preferred age range is +/- 5 years of my age with my current girlfriend being 31. In your 30s, I'd highly recommend shared interest meetup groups and social circle game. Befriend many new people, including women, and they can introduce you to their single female friends. I find this to be a far easier transition to dating than cold approach, though cold approach obviously will give you a much greater pool to work with. I no longer use OLD, either.
/r/seduction07/09/25 06:17 PM
53

This. I'm 34 and would prefer a late 30s woman over an early 20s woman pretty much every time. Around +/- 5 years of my age seems about perfect. My girlfriend's 31 and has many of the same qualities like communicates well, doesn't live online, career woman, owns her own house, no longer parties, talks and texts in complete sentences like a non-brain dead human being, etc.
/r/seduction07/09/25 01:59 AM
6

Get back out there and talk to people. Just go in with lower expectations and focus on the experience, not the results.
/r/seduction06/09/25 05:05 PM
-1

People often avoid eye contact specifically to deter people from approaching them.
/r/seduction06/09/25 04:01 PM
2

Don't use Tinder and don't meet women at bars or clubs.
/r/seduction06/09/25 03:12 PM
1

I got married in my 20s and my ex-wife really dragged me down into the dirt and wore me down. I'd had enough and just didn't have the energy to date again for around a year when I divorced her. In my 30s I've focused my energy on my business. But I did go on a decent amount of dates and did find a new girlfriend. I realized I no longer relate to most people in their 20s or at least younger than late 20s. I like having someone around the same age with similar life experiences such as completely d…
/r/seduction06/09/25 05:00 AM
1

It's an important central topic like religion that can break couples up in a hurry if they're not in alignment. Politics can be as well. Most people probably don't discuss them in the first few dates but keep in mind you're skating on thin ice if you don't want children and your partner does. Just never lie about it.
/r/seduction06/09/25 04:48 AM
1

Fairly similar timeline. I married at 27 and divorced at 32. It seemed way longer than that. My ex was so toxic that I took an entire year off after the divorce to rest from any dating and regroup. But in the last year and a half or so I went on some nice dates and found a great girlfriend. I'm a business owner, have a house, student debts are fully paid off and so forth. The younger women who were still a work in progress just weren't relatable in that sense and I connected more with women clos…
/r/seduction06/09/25 02:28 AM
4

I went through a casual play phase in undergrad/college around ages 18-21. It was unbelievably easy as I lived on campus and the female dorms were very close walking distance. We were all constantly crossing each other's paths; college is an easy time to meet new people. But I strongly prefer LTRs and just having tons of sex with one person at a time. My ex-wife and I probably romped like 2500+ times, but couples tend to have sex very frequently when you live together.
/r/seduction05/09/25 11:36 AM
1

18-21 for quantity. After undergrad I shifted towards LTR and also got married in my 20s, though divorced at 32. Now back in another LTR.
/r/seduction05/09/25 02:52 AM
1

I guess at a maximum, +1 " to round up wouldn't be the worst sin. Definitely don't alter your age by even a year, though. I just prefer to go into dating with honesty, even if it may be vulnerabilities. But on the height metric for OLD, it can be kind of funny and refreshing as I've had a woman say I was "taller than her 6 foot ex" who apparently lied/exaggerated his profile height.
/r/seduction05/09/25 01:11 AM
2

IRL. But I did like OLD in years past when profiles were equal write-up and photos, not just photos. I was always honest about the demographic boxes like height and listed 5'11 every time instead of 6'0 to 6'1 as that's my barefoot height and is on my license and old Google links when I was a student athlete. It used to be fun before it turned into swipe while you wipe.
/r/seduction04/09/25 08:56 PM
12

Indeed. My favorite few relationships, I wouldn't trade them for 100+ different women for casual play.
/r/seduction04/09/25 02:59 AM
7

College is by far the easiest time in your life to meet new people and date. Just talk to people. Campuses literally have thousands of women in your age range roaming about all hours of the day.
/r/seduction04/09/25 02:44 AM
1

No.
/r/seduction04/09/25 02:42 AM
1

She hasn't responded in a week. Chances are she's talking to other guys and is probably just keeping you hanging by a thread if things don't work out. It doesn't hurt to re-engage, but she doesn't sound interested. Keep minimal expectations with her.
/r/seduction03/09/25 09:34 PM
1

Be your natural self. Don't try to play any kind of persona or mask your authenticity. You want to be able to be yourself around people, otherwise you're going to be miserable and you'll look like a fool when you're called out for being disingenuous. It's okay to show a little flare if that's how you like to be. Don't worry about it. You be you. Stay honest with yourself and to others.
/r/seduction03/09/25 09:31 PM
1

Don't worry about the math. It only takes one woman to make a couple with you. Just keep trying.
/r/seduction03/09/25 09:26 PM
11

This. I've done it all from one night stands in college to LTRs, including a marriage. My one night stand phase was around 18-21 and then I decided to focus on LTRs. I also got married in my 20s. Do I regret the LTRs and marriage? I only regret not better vetting the woman I married as she hid her mental illness for a decent while before I could really figure out what was going with her beyond being what guys would call a "baddie" who was extremely hot but tempered and unpredictable; she became …
/r/seduction03/09/25 09:22 PM
1

And possibly banned/trespassed if multiple people complain to management.
/r/seduction03/09/25 07:06 PM
2

Just be honest with them. Tell them you're looking to date again and ask if they have any single friends who may be looking for the same. If you have rapport with the friends, they'll often be happy to introduce you to people they know. Women often talk to each other about these things and know each other's dating status. When I had a few really good platonic friends that I met up with all the time, we talked about each other's dates and critique'd. There were a few times where I outright said "…
/r/seduction03/09/25 06:27 PM
1

This can be ymmv territory. Some like to suggest it at the end of a date, later that night, or within the next few days. I think putting the ball in her court to call or text when she gets home is pretty solid and gentleman-ish.
/r/seduction03/09/25 06:24 PM
1

This has to be satire.
/r/seduction03/09/25 06:21 PM
1

OP could be a 200 IQ genius, but no one will ever take you even remotely seriously if you type and communicate like a middle schooler.
/r/seduction03/09/25 07:47 AM
1

Just befriend more women. They'll introduce you to their single friends and guess what? You have a way better "wing" than guy friends of yours since there will be more trust / less skepticism. I met my current girlfriend this way.
/r/seduction03/09/25 07:40 AM
1

Sure thing, "player."
/r/seduction03/09/25 07:37 AM
10

OP's post reads like 2009 PUA era fan fiction threads that I remember rolling my eyes at even in high school.
/r/seduction02/09/25 05:41 AM
2

Good luck to all. You'll find someone.
/r/seduction02/09/25 02:29 AM
-2

Savoy (Nick Benedict) tried doing that for a time after Love Systems collapsed. But forget PUA nonsense.
/r/seduction01/09/25 07:47 AM
2

You should be the one to get the number and setup the date. Women do pursue men as well but you'll generally need to have some things going for you like high status, big money or tall, very attractive, etc.
/r/seduction01/09/25 03:02 AM
15

Make female friends and have them introduce you to their single friends. The best wing by far is a woman's trusted friend. Women know about wingmen and will be more skeptical of your intentions and the wing's bias in that situation. But her own friend, she'll be able to vet you behind your back through her. It works. The times I've used a female friend for introductions have been the easiest transitions into dating. My current girlfriend was through a female friend's introduction.
/r/seduction01/09/25 03:00 AM
37

It might be less common with Gen Z since you guys live online and are afraid of your own shadow, but plenty of people still cold approach.
/r/seduction31/08/25 07:52 PM
1

Sure. Or just keep it simple and say "what's your number?" You can add that you stay busy and don't live online. But get number -> introduction text plus advanced notice of call -> phone call is what I've found to work best. Work on setting up a date ASAP. She might be talking to multiple guys and you don't want to just be an online orbiter.
/r/seduction31/08/25 07:17 PM
1

Don't worry about height. It's a variable about yourself that you can't change. But guess what, you can improve your confidence, build muscle, advance your career and so forth. Who cares if some women disqualify you for height. I'm 5'11 barefoot and multiple women called me "too short" during online dating talks. Consider it a blessing if you are rejected by shallow women. I'll also add that I've been rejected for guys several inches shorter. And that's totally fine. One of the most charismatic …
/r/seduction31/08/25 06:59 PM
-3

Quit propping up the old PUA books.
/r/seduction31/08/25 06:56 PM
1

Personally, I would immediately move from social media to the phone. You want to remove any notion of being an e-friend to being a potential date. Sometimes I'll add women to Facebook so they can poke around a bit for congruence but communication will still be over the phone or texting. The usual progression I find that works best is to get her number, text her to let her know who it is and a heads up that I'll be calling. Then talk on the phone for a few minutes and setup a date during a high n…
/r/seduction31/08/25 06:46 PM
2

When you see someone you want to meet, then start living in the moment right then. Don't allow yourself time to strategize, analyze or come up with some kind of game plan because it's unnecessary. Do you do this every time you talk with friends and family? I'd hope not. Also realize that upwards of half of people do not even have an internal monologue. My ex-wife didn't have one.
/r/seduction31/08/25 06:36 PM
1

Why would you move from social media to another social media platform? Get her phone number. I'd also say two hours of convo before meeting face to face is excessive. Try to establish a meeting or you'll just be her pen pal.
/r/seduction31/08/25 06:32 PM
1

I don't pre-plan them. It may just simply be an introduction and a hello, a comment about her style, the location, or any random thing.
/r/seduction31/08/25 12:28 PM
1

The only really necessary "wing" is a female friend of the women you're being introduced to. It's pretty much the best chest code ever. Women know guys use their male friends to try to make up any random bullshit to try to make them look good and get laid. But an actual referral from one of her trusted friends is the golden ticket.
/r/seduction30/08/25 11:55 PM
10

To be fair, it was written by Mystery. I think most rational people know by now not to take his advice as anything beyond entertainment.
/r/seduction30/08/25 01:55 AM
2

Whenever you see her again. Just put her on your radar and ask for her number. If she says she has a boyfriend or any usual excuse, so be it. As long as you try you can't fault yourself.
/r/seduction30/08/25 01:42 AM
1

Just introduce yourself and don't overthink it or bring up that you've "seen her" even if you've noticed her before.
/r/seduction30/08/25 01:09 AM
6

She wants to be heard and her boyfriend isn't communicating with her about their problems.
/r/seduction30/08/25 01:07 AM
8

Don't engage. I married a woman like the OP described and she became violent and was more unhinged than just her challenging banter when I first met her. These women are often above average hot but mentally unstable.
/r/seduction30/08/25 01:00 AM
5

Don't take the rejections personally. Just be graceful and shake them off. Keep trying. It sounds like you're mainly going after lackluster matches anyway if most would cheat on their partner. Try some different avenues and maybe aim for women who are more mature and sophisticated. It sounds like you're really insecure about your height at a minimum and you really need to change that. I'm 5'11 barefoot and have been told I'm "too short" by some women as well, though usually just online dating/ap…
/r/seduction30/08/25 12:50 AM
2

You can't build height, but you can build self esteem, muscle and just work harder in general. Don't get involved with anyone currently in a relationship. And be yourself, aka don't pretend to "be a thug."
/r/seduction30/08/25 12:46 AM
1

It's probably more oldschool, but I often will just let her know who it is and then send a text telling her to pick up the phone. I don't use FaceTime so I can focus more on the conversation and to build more anticipation for an actual face to face date. Ideally, try not to talk too much as the goal is just to establish and setup a date. I find phone convos lead to far less flaking than text.
/r/seduction29/08/25 07:11 PM
3

Here's a common sense hack: you'll have tons of sex when you're in a long term relationship. My ex-wife and I had sex probably over 2500+ times. Find someone you really like and the sex will be a dessert of the relationship. Just be sure that you're both compatible in multiple other areas beyond the physical and have other common ground. If you know you like her body, then make a considerable effort getting to know her and how you may operate as a couple/team.
/r/seduction29/08/25 07:00 PM
13

Guys really need to stop with this weird idolization of "Chads." Don't try to be what you think is a stereotypical alpha male type, instead work on bettering the aspects of your life you have control over like advancing your career, going to the gym and networking with people. Be congruent with yourself and don't play any kind of persona to try to broaden your reach. If anything, it'll just set you back.
/r/seduction29/08/25 06:55 PM
1

Texting is a drier and more impersonal form of communication. Definitely don't shy away from calling. At a minimum you might need to use text first to establish that you're going to call since newer generations have the attention span of a goldfish.
/r/seduction29/08/25 06:51 PM
2

What is important is being congruent and honest to yourself, her, and to everyone else. Being charitable is nice as well. It's even better when you don't seek validation. Being a gentleman and opening doors for her without sulking for a response is an attractive trait, just as spoiling her without making it a big deal. You get the idea. Do things because you want to and not because you seek approval/validation.
/r/seduction29/08/25 05:52 PM
3

Don't cheat on your partner. Discuss things with your wife and/or look into a divorce. Marriage is really tough. I was married from 27-32 and it seems like it was so much longer as the last couple years were constant fights started by her. I did everything I could for her and she still refused to treat her mental illness. With you you're going to have to do some work and figure out where you'd like your marriage to go. If you cheat and there's proof, it could also further complicate your divorce…
/r/seduction29/08/25 05:09 PM
3

I'm almost 35 and don't talk to college aged folks much, but others have posted that it's not as common for those groups to just sit around and chit chat like was more common in years past. I was lucky that my entire high school experience was pre-smartphone and phones were a bit more sophisticated in the later undergrad years but it's nothing like today. Kids today can't seem to do anything without putting their phone down.
/r/seduction29/08/25 05:00 PM
3

It can depend on a lot of factors. People over at least 50 or so generally seem to love talking to strangers no matter the area of the US as they grew up without internet and cell phones during more social eras when people regularly would hang out at each other's houses, at malls, etc. It used to be common to just walk over and talk to your neighbors all the time like you see on old tv shows like Friends and Seinfeld.
/r/seduction29/08/25 01:12 AM
1

That's the best way. I think my ex-wife and I had sex probably like 2500 to 3000 times. Not trying to flex as people in relationships have a lot of sex, but I'd prefer it to wasting time with one night stands.
/r/seduction28/08/25 08:42 PM
3

I definitely rolled my eyes. Posts like that were semi-common during the PUA days as a lot of people were likely from places like 4chan. I don't mind many of the beginner level questions as most people starting threads are legit novices; the others appear to be scammers trying to sell coaching they're promoting from ChatGPT. Others are coming from really bad advice as well. The ones who just come on to brag or be cartoon caricatures like "I'm here to slay some tail" offer nothing at all.
/r/seduction28/08/25 02:43 PM
3

That's one of the more severe brain rot conversations I've seen in a good while. I feel like I now need to do a crossword puzzle or something to not permanently lose IQ points after reading that drivel.
/r/seduction28/08/25 06:50 AM
1

You shouldn't need any apps. The streets of NYC are busy all day and night.
/r/seduction28/08/25 04:11 AM
3

People in clubs act pretty trashy on average, both men and women. I quit going to them around age 25 and it was for the best. You'll encounter these types of people if you go with any regularity. And while she may not have been drunk, many others likely were. It's not the kind of atmosphere I'd care to be.
/r/seduction28/08/25 04:09 AM
4

Sure thing, "player."
/r/seduction28/08/25 03:02 AM
1

35 is considered pretty old for an undergrad student who is not taking on a career change. CS is a great degree, though. Make sure you can complete it as soon as you can so you can enter the workforce full-time and develop a work history. You'll start out on the same pay grade as guys like 21 years old but at least you'll be adding some structure and will have a steady income. If you can juggle even part-time work with your studies, consider it. Also work on your mental health. Dating should be …
/r/seduction28/08/25 02:59 AM
10

Ignore and continue to move on.
/r/seduction28/08/25 02:53 AM
9

I'll assume this was satire.
/r/seduction28/08/25 02:21 AM
2

Your writing style could definitely use some work, but I essentially agree with what you're saying. The PUA movement was a marketing scam geared towards vulnerable groups such as the lonely/depressed and incels. Much of the carryover in the earlier days appeared to be from the bodybuilding misc forum and 4chan. "Lay counts" became the new "max bench" where guys would try to one up each other for online dweeb-cred. The Game and Mystery Method certainly added mainstream visibility while the intern…
/r/seduction27/08/25 08:13 PM
2

And yet nearly example I've seen comes across as an insult. It's best to let it go. Guys think these lines are clever when in reality it's just unnecessary. Shittalk with friends you know well but not with women you've just met.
/r/seduction27/08/25 07:41 PM
2

OP sounds like me when I was about 18 years old. You have the right idea to be direct and honest of your intentions. Don't lie, deceive or manipulate. But don't "pretend you have a girlfriend" just for exterior validation. Be honest and congruent both to yourself and society at large.
/r/seduction27/08/25 07:39 PM
1

The few guys out there still hanging onto the PUA cult may defend Mystery, but negging in reality is just being an artificial asshole under the fake premise of playful push/pull. Most guys would use it in a way that will just piss a woman off. Light teasing, sure. But negging, no. Don't say idiotic things from The Game days like calling into question if her nails are real, etc.
/r/seduction27/08/25 07:33 PM
1

Don't use negs.
/r/seduction27/08/25 07:29 PM
1

Weekends will have all ages out in abundance most places no matter day or night.
/r/seduction27/08/25 04:53 PM
1

Same thing, just more specific to daylight hours. Many people tend to be rushed during the daytime as those are traditional work hours. You often see demographics like college students, stay at home moms and retirees roaming about during those hours unless it's a huge city where there are tourists or just a larger population in general. People don't have the flexibility to freely walk around the town when they're working.
/r/seduction27/08/25 04:36 PM
1

My "womanizer years" were 18-21 and then I focused purely on LTR when I finished undergrad as casual sex is pretty meaningless to me. Went on a ton of dates the next few years, dated some cool women. Got engaged at 26, married at 27 and then divorced at 32 to a really toxic woman who lied and deceived her life by hiding her mental illness and I was absolutely exhausted trying to make things work when she just got more of control and unwilling to seek help. Dating has many ups and downs and I'm s…
/r/seduction27/08/25 04:22 PM
-2

I don't as it's not a priority.
/r/seduction27/08/25 04:15 PM
1

Rich college aged woman? Has she banked millions on Only Fans since turning 18 or something?
/r/seduction27/08/25 04:14 PM
1

There's nothing wrong with this. If she's into you, it may even make her less nervous as well.
/r/seduction27/08/25 06:38 AM
1

Very, very few of reconnected couples succeed. It can happen, but nearly everyone falls into the same patterns and do the same things that caused the breakup in the first place.
/r/seduction27/08/25 06:29 AM
1

You can obviously be a student and go on dates, find a girlfriend, etc. Plenty of people are even married by 25. I was engaged at 26 and married at 27. But don't worry about it too much. There are plenty of single people and you should have no trouble finding someone. Just get out and talk to people when you have the time.
/r/seduction27/08/25 06:24 AM
9

You have to be kidding. There are plenty of confident women out there who will pursue a guy they want. Many will do so due to a lack of time to date as otherwise they'd probably just date a coworker. Or they just have an idea of what they want and aren't afraid to go for it instead of just sit back and let others make the move.
/r/seduction27/08/25 01:46 AM
9

Only PUA clowns used scripted material beyond basic pick up lines as they never developed a personality of their own. Don't be that guy.
/r/seduction27/08/25 01:42 AM
14

None. Quit idolizing PUA clowns.
/r/seduction26/08/25 09:27 PM
29

I'd say no. People often wear earphones in public as a prop for people to leave them alone.
/r/seduction26/08/25 09:26 PM
3

Zero as I'm currently in a relationship. But when single maybe a dozen or so on weekends.
/r/seduction26/08/25 09:25 PM
1

This. Don't be dating or approaching women until you get treatment for your mental health.
/r/seduction26/08/25 06:11 PM
0

If you had sex at a park, I can see why she ghosted you. That could literally brand you both as lifetime sex offenders.
/r/seduction26/08/25 06:08 PM
1

Have you not tried to find a woman you like for more than just sex?
/r/seduction26/08/25 06:06 PM
1

You just have to grow up and find more qualities you like from a woman besides sex. See them as equal humans to you because they are.
/r/seduction26/08/25 04:15 PM
2

Try to show that it doesn't bother you one bit. Learn to accept that it's you and that it's totally fine. Own it. Some women might outright refuse to date you for your hair or lack of and that's fine. Plenty of women also hate long hair, beards, etc. Bangs can also look too childish on a man. There's no style that is 100% universally liked by women.
/r/seduction26/08/25 04:11 PM
1

Try to find a woman you actually want to get to know and be around for more than just sex. I made the mistake of marrying a "10." Sure, we had sex thousands of times. But we were not very compatible and I only tried to think we did just because she was bubbly and sexual. Now I'd take compatible and sane every time even if the sex is much less frequent.
/r/seduction26/08/25 04:08 PM
1

Please tell me this is satire.
/r/seduction26/08/25 08:14 AM
1

Yes, unless you're upfront in advance that you'd like to go dutch.
/r/seduction26/08/25 08:11 AM
3

Whatever city you're currently in.
/r/seduction25/08/25 04:17 PM
3

I think everyone's either been in that situation or too afraid to speak up and ask. Plenty of people have a lot of single people they know. Does that automatically mean you're going to be introduced to all or most of them? Of course not and it's a crapshoot like any other meetup. I'd say maybe find an activity you like and really network from there. Two examples for me have been through volleyball and rock climbing. It obviously doesn't have to be those for you but you get the idea. Those are ju…
/r/seduction25/08/25 03:47 AM
1

34
/r/seduction24/08/25 02:54 AM
212

Cold approach and social/inner circle game are the only outlets I'd use. I found my current girlfriend through a mutual friend's introduction and it was probably the easiest transition into dating I've ever had as there was a built-in trust factor with shared friends. Women will find weird excuses to disqualify for online dating. Even at 5'11" I've been told I'm too short (I'm exactly 5'11 barefoot, 6' to 6'1 in shoes and don't round up to six feet since 5'11 is correct and that is what is on my…
/r/seduction23/08/25 10:35 PM
2

If you're 18-23 or so, any college setting. Otherwise, any busy streets, entertainment areas, etc. During the day most people are working or on their lunch break. There's not a lot of free time before 5pm for the average adult who's not a student on weekdays. But obviously weekends are generally packed as people have the schedule to go out during the daytime without being in a rush.
/r/seduction23/08/25 08:07 PM
2

You smile and move on.
/r/seduction23/08/25 08:06 PM
4

They use staged and highly rehearsed material. Many comedians are really nervous and socially anxious people when they aren't working as that is their safe space. That's one thing that surprised me when I used to go to a ton of comedy shows in Hollywood is how reserved most of the guys were once their shows ended and they dropped the showmanship act.
/r/seduction23/08/25 08:01 PM
2

No and zero interest.
/r/seduction23/08/25 07:54 PM
6

29 and 22 are definitely not the same life stage for many people. At 29 I was married, owned my own house, in the third year of operating my business, almost had my student loans fully paid off, was no longer partying, did not hang around anyone in a university setting, zero financial dependency on parents, etc.
/r/seduction23/08/25 05:32 PM
4

Because it's very important. You need to not only find meaning and purpose in your own life but you also need to build a strong foundation together with your partner. With many people these anchors are things like faith/religion. Most people date others of similar religious beliefs and also people usually date someone with similar political opinions. It's okay to agree to disagree on some things while others may be dealbreakers. Wanting or not wanting to raise children is obviously another huge …
/r/seduction23/08/25 05:21 PM
1

I'd imagine the potential of up to around a million a year. At least like 700k/yr. Those guys work their asses off.
/r/seduction23/08/25 03:19 PM
3

Hook-ups aren't for everyone. I definitely prefer to have sex when there's an established emotional bond, aka in a relationship or building towards one with the intention of pursuing one. The sex generally greatly improves after some time together as you respect, appreciate and trust one another.
/r/seduction23/08/25 03:46 AM
2

This was a fair time to actuslly say TL;DR. Don't "rest your bulge" on strangers. OP's post has to be satire, though, or he's just batshit insane.
/r/seduction23/08/25 02:21 AM
1

She agreed to a second date but you continue to make the same mistakes with her and not listen to her. Communicate better and respect her pace.
/r/seduction23/08/25 02:18 AM
1

Wear a style that suits you and fits your personality.
/r/seduction23/08/25 02:16 AM
1

Yes. I met my current girlfriend through social circle. It can work really well because you share mutual friends and so there are multiple factors at play. One of the most important is the person who introduces you, especially someone who knows the person you're meeting for the first time, is a perfect "wing" because they already know and trust each other. Also, because you both share mutual friends it automatically comes with built-in lore to draw upon for conversation. It's almost a cheat code…
/r/seduction23/08/25 02:09 AM
2

This is the simple and practical answer. Are you intentionally aloof and mysterious around friends and family? Probably not. Use common sense here. I swear, this sub is still brainwashed at times by PUA clowns giving terrible advice.
/r/seduction22/08/25 06:36 PM
2

This is surely satire.
/r/seduction22/08/25 06:33 PM
0

Neutral conversations are just fine. As long as you demonstrate that your life is in check such as working hard, staying busy, having hobbies and friends, don't worry about it. The problem is guys just try way too hard to mirror or impress a woman and they can pick up on this, both nice guys and guys trying to be clown-y pick up artists. Women can easily pick up on when a guy is being disingenuous. Don't pretend to be a dweeb straight out of The Game and don't pretend to be what you think is her…
/r/seduction22/08/25 06:30 PM
2

Close as in get numbers? It varies. If she has a boyfriend or a husband, then don't worry about those and let them be. Women will also say they have a partner many times when they don't for any variety of reasons like they don't want to be bothered, you're coming across too strongly, or any random reason; you just respect those scenarios and move on. Sometimes you get a number and sometimes you don't. But at least assume she's moderately curious at a minimum if you get the number and then push f…
/r/seduction22/08/25 06:16 PM
2

For getting numbers, you really just need to be confident, introduce yourself and have a quick chat. I'm sure you've done this before countless times. You've spoken to many strangers in your lifetime. Just because it may be a woman you could want to take on a date shouldn't be any different. Just talk like a normal human being and then close it out on a high note with getting her number.
/r/seduction22/08/25 06:13 PM
1

Texting should be your lowest priority. It's dry and impersonal. Focus purely on your interactions IRL. You only need texting to setup dates or to tell her to expect a call from you.
/r/seduction22/08/25 02:41 PM
1

The point was, plenty of really driven people put dating off until they're really settled into their careers (late 20s, even 30s).
/r/seduction22/08/25 02:37 PM
1

Take a deep breath and relax. It's not a big deal at all. A guy from my graduating high school class is 34 and is still a virgin. He's finishing his residency for neurosurgery which apparently takes a really long time.
/r/seduction22/08/25 06:47 AM
89

If you won't attempt to be human, then don't talk to women at all.
/r/seduction22/08/25 06:44 AM
4

At that time, it was easy to meet women because I lived on campus. There were thousands of them walking around at all hours of the day. I just approached, got a number and early into our talks I'd be frank and mention that I wasn't seeking a relationship. It wasn't all that complicated.
/r/seduction22/08/25 06:41 AM
-2

My hookup phase was around ages 18-21. I'd just tell them I was looking for casual upfront. Don't lie, deceive or manipulate.
/r/seduction22/08/25 04:19 AM
1

Don't lie about having the measles just to have a weird conversational excuse. That's beyond bizarre.
/r/seduction22/08/25 12:59 AM
0

It depends. Some women are straight up divas and I want no part of it. Others are just honest and up front with what they want or don't want. It can be tricky to tell the difference. I like strong women in the sense of career driven, work hard, educated, financially and emotionally secure and so forth. I definitely try hard to look for red flags as no woman is worth it if she's severely mentally ill like my ex-wife.
/r/seduction21/08/25 07:46 PM
0

I hope for your sake that this is satire.
/r/seduction21/08/25 05:27 AM
4

If it's a friend you wouldn't want to lose, then don't make advances. But flirting in general, keep it to in person or over the phone at a minimum. Texting is too dry and impersonal.
/r/seduction21/08/25 05:25 AM
1

Have you tried putting your phone down and actually talking to people in person?
/r/seduction21/08/25 05:22 AM
3

I'm within a year in age to OP and also find many women older than me both attractive and great conversationalists. My girlfriend's 31, but I could just as easily see myself dating a woman several years older. However, I generally prefer +/- 5 years as I'd like to marry again and to someone reasonably close in age to me. OP, you're probably into confident women who are direct and know what they want. It's also likely refreshing to be around women who aren't glued to social media. Older generatio…
/r/seduction21/08/25 05:12 AM
1

If it makes you feel better, I'm 5'11 barefoot (upwards of maybe 6'1" in shoes but I often just wear flats and sandals for comfort in Southern California), and have been rejected for guys closer to your height. Height does help, but it's not everything. I've also posted about it before, but one of the most Casanova guys I've ever seen was maybe like 5'5 max, much shorter than me. It was a guy who was in our vacation group a few years back and women were literally competing for him. I was in the …
/r/seduction20/08/25 07:12 PM
3

Be proud of who you are. Religion is often an important stone in relationships and most people date others of similar faith. Sure, there might be some denominational differences among churches. But you get the idea. Discuss it ahead of time if it's of importance because you'd be wasting both of your time if she's of a different faith that would be a dealbreaker.
/r/seduction20/08/25 05:26 PM
27

She likely reflected on the date and doesn't see you as boyfriend material. If she's still replying at this point, expect that she's talking to other guys and is keeping you somewhere down at the bottom of the totem pole.
/r/seduction20/08/25 07:45 AM
1

Do you have to overthink this much around others? It sounds like you either aren't interested in them or are too nervous and calculated. Live in the moment and stop thinking several moves ahead. Conversation is not a game of chess. Use your surroundings. Ask questions beyond the obvious. Be a good listener. Take note of what interests her and bounce topics accordingly. It sounds like you aren't listening to your dates and think it's fully on you to entertain. Just relax and quit putting so much …
/r/seduction19/08/25 10:50 PM
2

Open, honest and friendly.
/r/seduction19/08/25 10:46 PM
16

This can be an interesting thing and my perspective has changed on it over the years. In my 20s I had many first dates where I either invited women directly over on the first date or vice versa. The majority of times there was no sex and I didn't intend to get physical on a first date anyway. In my case I'd invite to my place purely because I had to wake up very early at around 4am and was really tired by evenings. I just didn't feel like going out. This was also during a time when I was having …
/r/seduction19/08/25 01:13 PM
6

Just talk to people. Don't overthink it.
/r/seduction19/08/25 04:13 AM
2

12 dates in three months is completely normal. You might want to start communicating with her on where you both stand and how you'd like to progress.
/r/seduction19/08/25 04:11 AM
1

I mean, I've lived in Los Angeles county. There are plenty of people with tattoos. But neck tats is a bit much. That's a pretty glaring distraction.
/r/seduction19/08/25 02:27 AM
1

So you're saying her parents are rich, not her? That changes perspective. Just ignore that and treat her like anyone else. She'll have to end up on her own like everyone else.
/r/seduction18/08/25 09:42 PM
1

You say you're broke. Do you have a job or earn money? You need to work on that before going on any dates.
/r/seduction18/08/25 08:32 PM
4

It sounds more desperate than cocky.
/r/seduction18/08/25 08:28 PM
1

If she doesn't want to kiss you elsewhere, then she won't suddenly want to kiss you just because it's in a place like your house.
/r/seduction18/08/25 07:32 PM
7

Get her on the phone and see if she's more responsive with calls. Texting is a dry and fairly impersonal way of communication.
/r/seduction18/08/25 07:30 PM
4

I was in a similar situation as my divorce was settled when I was 32 and I started dating again. However, I quickly realized that college aged and grad school aged women were no longer relatable on multiple levels. They had no financial security, minimal emotional security, odd outlooks and entitlement based upon their perceived worth at the moment, etc. Late 20s might be a better compromise. Women start to grow up a bit when they're in the work force for several years and their parents stop pay…
/r/seduction18/08/25 05:41 PM
1

Keep your distance and don't get involved.
/r/seduction18/08/25 05:34 PM
5

You had nothing but free time.
/r/seduction18/08/25 05:32 PM
3

I can mostly agree with this. I'm 34 and didn't ask for a second date with any of the college women I took on dates. It didn't really seem like they were worth my time if they weren't fully out of college, completely independent from parents financially and had the routine of career and being in the real world for at least a few years. My current girlfriend's 31 and really has her ducks in a row with her own house, full-time professional career, maintains hobbies, reads, and doesn't party. I wou…
/r/seduction17/08/25 09:16 PM
1

As OP said himself, that age range is just not as relatable by your late 20s. By 27 I was recently married and starting my own full-time business. College people were not on my radar and by that point I had surrounded myself with other young professionals or people older than me with wisdom and who were business savvy. I became single again in my early 30s after a marriage with a really hot woman who concealed her mental illness during our early dating years or I was just ignoring the red flags.…
/r/seduction17/08/25 09:08 PM
8

Of course. It wouldn't be surprising if this is just e-posturing. The seduction communities have done this for decades; there were carryover crowds from places like the misc forum on bodybuilding dot com and also 4chan. There are many basement dwelling gamers who love to shitpost e-stats like it's a leader board. This is absolutely nothing new about the internet. I'm fully on board that dating one person is still quite a time commitment to schedule and arrange logistics when you have other prior…
/r/seduction17/08/25 05:03 PM
1

I'm 34 and quit going to bars and clubs around age 25. There are literally thousands of places you can find women around you. Bar and club type settings will have the most competition because guys go there fully expecting to try to meet someone. They're also too loud and in your 30s you'll probably hate the music.
/r/seduction17/08/25 04:33 PM
0

Dress how you want to dress. If you dress in anything remotely resembling business attire, people will think you're trying to sell them something. If you dress like a bum, then people will think you're panhandling for money Even as a business owner, I like casual dress. I'm in California and so when I was single I'd often even do approaches while in sandals. Dressing comfortably and practically is totally fine, just as dressing more business-like or in formal attire is totally fine.
/r/seduction17/08/25 04:21 PM
1

As someone else said, it's about honesty. You can't lie about any aspects of your life/lifestyle. If even just one thing is found to be a lie then you have no credibility remaining as a potential or current partner. People are actually stupid enough to lie about things that can be verified in a matter of seconds like age and height. Your profession can also be found out pretty easily or through follow-up questions. And don't lie about enjoying things that you don't like/know absolutely know noth…
/r/seduction17/08/25 04:07 PM
4

21 is an extremely easy time in your life to meet people and network in person. You don't need online apps. Walk around and talk to people. It's even easier if you're still in college or in a college area.
/r/seduction17/08/25 03:34 PM
16

One. I'm not a circus clown, so no plate spinning.
/r/seduction17/08/25 03:28 PM
1

Have your own style and personalize it to your situation. You might bring up callbacks to your last date. Maybe an event is coming up and you can tell her about it. But whatever the case, it's all a backdrop to bring up going on another date and give her a time and a place to meet again. The focus is just arranging the date with the focus on seeing in person. Don't worry so much on what you talk about; the point is just to setup the date and phone generally is better than text for doing it. Don'…
/r/seduction17/08/25 07:13 AM
-2

Be a gentleman instead.
/r/seduction17/08/25 12:19 AM
5

This must be a sock account of the 50 year old coach you're replying to with 111 subscribers.
/r/seduction16/08/25 10:24 PM
1

Be direct with her regarding what you're looking for.
/r/seduction16/08/25 10:21 PM
3

Don't worry about it. Anti-emoji is more of an introverted Reddit thing. Most people don't mind them at all.
/r/seduction16/08/25 10:19 PM
3

Make a serious effort to treat your mental health before dating even if it takes some time. My ex-wife has BPD which she tried her best to hide during the years we dated. Over time it got out of control to the point of constant verbal rages and violence. She wouldn't seek professional help and became a danger to anyone around her. Don't let your mental health go unchecked because it will affect your future partners, not just you.
/r/seduction16/08/25 10:17 PM
1

It basically means you're fat but honest and self aware to the fact. Some women fully embrace it while others will hide behind clever photo angles through OLD. A confident BBW can do just fine in the dating world.
/r/seduction16/08/25 10:12 PM
1

Don't overthink it or play games. In the earlier stages, I tend to stick to quick phone calls. Texting is too dry and impersonal. Use them for light banter with the goal of setting up another date.
/r/seduction16/08/25 10:08 PM
1

Ease off the trigger and spend more time getting to know.
/r/seduction16/08/25 10:06 PM
1

You may not relate much to a 21 year old at 27 even though you're both in your 20s. I was already married by 27 with a career, a house, etc compared to a typical 21 year old with minimal life experience.
/r/seduction16/08/25 04:35 AM
2

It's probably for the best to move on.
/r/seduction15/08/25 05:21 PM
2

It's a PUA book. Just read it for entertainment and historical value, not for actual dating advice.
/r/seduction15/08/25 07:53 AM
2

Walk around campus and talk to women.
/r/seduction15/08/25 07:51 AM
1

I used to live in Santa Monica. There's a huge difference in status of a water park lifeguard vs. guys who safeguard beaches and put in a lot of training hours. Some of those guys are clearing over $300k a year or more. That's not to say someone at a water park can't get dates, but people generally think of water park lifeguards as bored teens getting paid to tan on their summer break.
/r/seduction15/08/25 12:34 AM
2

Who wouldn't look at you with disgust when you're "asked to twerk" right after meeting a stranger? But that aside, you need to plan dates more carefully if you don't like paying for them. Maybe it's best for you to just go for a walk. Or you can simply state ahead of time, in advance of the date, that you'd like to go double dutch. Communicate with her. As another poster mentioned, you don't have any entitlement towards physical results just because you went on a date or paid for her food. If yo…
/r/seduction14/08/25 11:54 PM
1

This has to be satire.
/r/seduction14/08/25 08:34 PM
20

Focus only on the city you're in and don't worry about anyone else's.
/r/seduction14/08/25 05:56 AM
1

I was thinking you were around 18 based on your post, not 37-38 if your post history is correct. Maybe you're just trolling, but it sounds like you aren't even trying. I'm 34, divorced, and yet I still managed to meet new people and find a girlfriend after going through a year long divorce battle from hell while also running a business. Don't wade through each day thinking about "horniness." That's just sad and juvenile. Talk to more people and try to find common ground. Maybe you'll find someon…
/r/seduction14/08/25 01:06 AM
1

It shouldn't take anywhere near that many interactions to get a girlfriend.
/r/seduction14/08/25 12:55 AM
1

Have you tried putting your phone down and actually talking to women in real life?
/r/seduction14/08/25 12:51 AM
4

Stop worrying about dating. Instead work on your financial situation and your mental health. Work hard to maintain a constant busy schedule and steady income. Even consider taking on two jobs. You're young and still single. I was already engaged at 26 and in the early stages of running a business then but still took on another side job. You can get a lot accomplished right now. But you need to build some capital and work on your self development first. Make sure you have enough money coming in t…
/r/seduction13/08/25 09:08 PM
2

Keep working hard and don't worry too much about your dating life. You can put yourself out there, but don't take it personally if you're rejected. It'll happen a lot. But at 21 you should have a pool of thousands of single and similar aged women in your area. You'll find someone.
/r/seduction13/08/25 09:02 PM
1

Go somewhere for the scenery, culture and so forth. Not the dating.
/r/seduction13/08/25 04:36 PM
-14

Have you tried joining a church? Seeking therapy?
/r/seduction13/08/25 02:33 AM
1

Just focus more on compatibility. You ideally want high stability, low drama for a nice long term partner. Don't get caught up in how acrobatic she is in bed. Find a woman who betters you, motivates you and keeps you happy. Think about if you could feel at home with her if you were accidentally stranded on an island together. The pandemic actually helped me start to realize my ex-wife and I were terribly incompatible when we were both home all day for a time. I married her mainly for her energy …
/r/seduction13/08/25 02:02 AM
1

Ideally, yes, when talking to total strangers. At least aim for that week when using the apps. If it's through social/inner circle, there are no real limits. I met my current girlfriend through a friend's introduction; we're both friends of this person. It actually took nearly three weeks to get our schedules lined up but we talked on the phone a few times in between and there was already a trust factor since we know many of the same people.
/r/seduction12/08/25 08:32 PM
2

The actual date doesn't have to be that day. People have lives and a work schedule. But try to schedule a date after a few messages. Before I was married and used OLD a lot back then, it wasn't uncommon to talk to someone for even a few weeks before meeting. But that may not work as well today.
/r/seduction12/08/25 04:09 PM
2

This has to be satire.
/r/seduction12/08/25 05:48 AM
1

Ask anything you may be curious to know or talk about.
/r/seduction12/08/25 05:46 AM
1

Don't use them. Just practice more and get better at thinking on your feet.
/r/seduction12/08/25 05:45 AM
17

My ex-wife. She initiated sex many of the times in our marriage. Her mental illness, BPD, was out of control and after a while sex was the only thing that'd calm her down. We were going at it 2-3 times a day for a time with a minimum of once a day. But towards the end it was just not that enjoyable because the emotional connection was gone and I accepted that she was not going to change.
/r/seduction12/08/25 05:40 AM
2

This is pretty well known from the PUA days and just makes you look like you're an insecure cosplaying clown. It was really common to see guys all try to dress and style the same way with jeans, a long sleeve button-up with the top buttons unbuttoned in a weirdly calculated way to show some upper chest hair, sunglasses even indoors, clean shaven, and some random accessories like a shark tooth necklace, goggles, or whatever gimmick Mystery advised. Ill-fitting cheap blazers with jeans were also a…
/r/seduction11/08/25 04:25 PM
1

Be a gentleman, not a "nice guy." Gentlemen are genuine and courteous because it's good manners. Nice guys fake it for a disingenuous agenda like trying to get a kiss, get laid, etc.
/r/seduction11/08/25 04:23 PM
24

Don't worry about cat and mouse games or how you perceive you're doing.
/r/seduction11/08/25 06:46 AM
1

Find someone you enjoy getting to know with genuine interest. If you aren't vibing with her, move on.
/r/seduction11/08/25 06:44 AM
2

There are two likely reasons here. She does want to see you and is legitimately busy or She's going on dates with other guys and is pushing your schedule down the calendar in case things don't work out with them If she completely blows it off with you, it was because of reason two.
/r/seduction10/08/25 06:52 PM
6

This. The guy is spamming multiple subs desperate for new clients.
/r/seduction10/08/25 03:39 PM
1

They're also often mentally ill and donations are dependent upon money for food to survive. People should not be mentally ill or desperate to find a girlfriend. But I get what you're trying to say. Certainly don't let rejections phase you because in reality it's not a big deal. Your survival is not dependent on having a romantic relationship, although it can certainly help.
/r/seduction10/08/25 03:32 PM
1

She'll pick up that you're inexperienced. You don't have to mention it outright, but you also can as you're being honest. She might appreciate the sincerity.
/r/seduction10/08/25 03:29 PM
2

This is the right approach.
/r/seduction10/08/25 03:24 AM
1

Quality over quantity. Find a good woman and if it's sex you want, you can have it thousands of times with her along with crrating a memorable journey together beyond the physical.
/r/seduction10/08/25 03:22 AM
3

Ymmv. I did ONS in my undergrad years, 18-21. I definitely don't think about those on even remotely the frequency level of actual LTR relationships as there was no emotional component to really consolidate the memories.
/r/seduction09/08/25 11:49 PM
38

Ages 29-31 I was still married. My ONS phase was ages 18-21 or so. No one night stands or casual relationships after college. Then I focused on actual relationships/LTR, including a marriage. I'm 34 now, divorced, and have been in a new relationship for four months thus far with a woman who's 31 and has her shit together, unlike my ex. Though it's still early into the journey.
/r/seduction09/08/25 07:43 PM
7

I also married in my 20s and was divorced by my early 30s; it was more for looks over true compatibility and ignored too many of her red flags. I took the entire first year off from dating to do some of the things you mentioned like self-development. It was also a rather bitter divorce as my ex kept dragging it out to see me suffer. Regarding age gaps, you may be surprised how little you connect with women in their early to mid 20s. After my divorce and some self development, I first started dat…
/r/seduction09/08/25 05:05 PM
-17

Indeed.
/r/seduction09/08/25 04:32 PM
1

Always wear hearing protection to clubs. Or just don't go. I personally outgrew the desire for clubs around age 25. Women who regularly party generally aren't girlfriend material anyway.
/r/seduction09/08/25 04:05 PM
-73

No idea. I don't go on vacation to have sex with anyone but my girlfriend.
/r/seduction09/08/25 03:55 PM
4

You also have to factor the many bots and people who join and never read it. I've been using FB since I was like 14-15 when they first allowed people to join without a college e-mail (2006); it's a high prevalence of bots in every group I'm in, private or not. A high number of the "members" are also likely guys who joined under a sock account to see if they are mentioned. I think you guys are seriously overthinking this. Don't worry about any gossip on a niche group or app. I've never once heard…
/r/seduction09/08/25 02:59 PM
4

I seriously doubt many local women in your area are wasting their time reading random dating threads.
/r/seduction09/08/25 01:43 PM
1

Millions of people have done it.
/r/seduction09/08/25 04:22 AM
1

I do not use apps. And I don't use Instagram. My current girlfriend was through social/inner game as I was introduced to her through a friend that we both know. I've had multiple LTRs including a marriage. At 34, I just don't care for one night stands, games and such. Nor do I care to waste time swiping around on apps.
/r/seduction09/08/25 04:12 AM
2

Women are everywhere. Stop and have a brief chat with them. You can always join shared hobby groups as well. When I was living in Santa Monica I played volleyball quite a bit and met a few girlfriends just from it. You can also use social/inner game by having your friends introduce you to female friends. I met my current girlfriend this way.
/r/seduction08/08/25 06:38 PM
1

That's pretty sad. I'm 34 and went on several dates with college aged women after my divorce because I got married in my 20s and frankly hadn't been on a date with anyone but my wife in several years. But I quickly found out college kids just aren't worth the time. It felt like I was their babysitter and disciplinarian, or they'd just start talking in general and it was easy to tell they're too inexperienced to understand how the real world works or their expectations of how life will be outside…
/r/seduction08/08/25 06:33 PM
2

I get that. It's just odd to me how young guys will live on campus at a university and then act surprised when you recommend walking outside and talking to the thousands of women their age roaming all around them at all times of the day. Yet they'll just instead sit on their phone and swipe thousands of times until their fingers bleed. This new generation's too soft.
/r/seduction08/08/25 04:59 PM
5

Clubs definitely aren't necessary. Too many guys rely on them just because they're filled with women while assuming all are available for casual or potential dating. But even that's not always the case. Many just want to go out with their female friends and dance, receive attention, etc. There are the downsides of clubs being way too loud (wear earplugs), the music can be pretty trashy, the dancing can be trashy, and the people can also be trashy. Plus people are drinking and sometimes are prett…
/r/seduction08/08/25 03:09 PM
2

If you're doing a date in the evening and especially on a weeknight after work, most women pretty much unofficially expect to be taken to dinner as they're hungry and probably haven't eaten since their lunch. That's perfectly normal. That's not to say you have to, but I'd imagine they are expecting some food.
/r/seduction08/08/25 02:59 PM
2

Thanks, AI.
/r/seduction08/08/25 02:57 PM
3

Men and women are equals. Quit thinking in terms of prizes.
/r/seduction08/08/25 02:56 PM
1

What is even considered "rizzing" to Gen Z? Talking to a woman at all offline? I'm always baffled how risk-averse kids these days are with communication.
/r/seduction08/08/25 05:50 AM
1

If she already revealed her hand, it's a green light. Go for it.
/r/seduction07/08/25 11:27 PM
1

The best wing is a woman that you already know who the woman you're pursuing already knows as well. Bringing a guy wing along who she doesn't know just brings skepticism. Women know guys use "wingmen" to say any random bullshit about them that may or may not be true. A trusted person in her circle brings instant credibility and congruence.
/r/seduction07/08/25 08:11 PM
2

Don't do it. if you can't hold back your feelings for her, then you need to stop going to her clinic and don't talk to her again. Period. If you want to remain a patient, don't comment on her looks, don't flirt with her, and don't ask her out.
/r/seduction07/08/25 08:05 PM
10

Don't worry about it. A guy from my graduating high school class still hasn't lost his virginity and he's just now finishing his training to be a neurosurgeon at 34. The point is, people often focus on career before worrying about their dating life.
/r/seduction06/08/25 08:34 PM
5

You can go alone. Just be careful with the "alt" crowd. From personal observation and experience, there's a pretty high likelihood that mental disorders like BPD will be much higher than normal among those kinds of crowds versus the general public.
/r/seduction06/08/25 01:47 PM
1

The best wing is a person the woman you're pursuing or introduced to already knows well. There's an actual built-in trust factor that can help tremendously. I met my current girlfriend through the introduction of one of her friends who I know as well. It was smooth as butter transitioning right into dating. Having your own guy "wing" brings a degree of skepticism if she doesn't already know him. Women know guys use a wingman to say any random bullshit about them. Don't neglect inner/social game.
/r/seduction06/08/25 01:35 PM
1

Keep the friend and work on your self esteem and overall self development.
/r/seduction06/08/25 01:32 PM
2

Don't feel you have to "catch up" on dating around just to date around because you were career focused in your 20s. Now's also a good time to find a keeper.
/r/seduction06/08/25 01:23 PM
1

When she confirmed she has a husband, that was your cue to go no contact. Even if she's potentially cheating on him, even if just emotionally, don't play that game.
/r/seduction06/08/25 06:59 AM
7

Tip: work on summarizing your thoughts in real time. Think big picture.
/r/seduction06/08/25 01:20 AM
-5

Pay the bill (yes, including hers) and use it as a learning experience. Has it happened to me before? Definitely. I don't go to bars and clubs and that alone cut down on most problems. You can communicate ahead of time on splitting the bill if you're worried someone will overspend more than is generally expected with common courtesy. Sometimes I'll still invite a date out to a restaurant on the first date with an unofficial open wallet for whatever she wants, though I won't say that out loud. Mo…
/r/seduction05/08/25 08:59 PM
2

You have to realize a lot of people in this sub are teenagers, college kids and incels. Most likely have never experienced an actual relationship. Or they "tried," but their PUA kung-fu left them without any genuine connection because they put on a fake tough guy act. Or their minds turned to mush after being conditioned by the manosphere to be algorithmic robots who think women are just living, breathing fleshlight toys.
/r/seduction05/08/25 07:21 PM
1

I actually don't mind this. But then again I tend to be a slow mover and try to get to know her beforehand. If it's someone I'm not sensing relationship vibes with, then I don't care to have sex with her at all. Bad vibes or red flags in general, I won't request a second date. I generally only get the chance to go on about one date a week, usually on Saturday or Sunday, so even waiting a month in reality isn't that long. Some people on this sub also go on ridiculously long dates early on upwards…
/r/seduction05/08/25 07:15 PM
5

The notion that pick up artists and "gurus" are any better with women than you.
/r/seduction05/08/25 06:04 PM
22

There should be standardized testing to pass before people have access to AI bots.
/r/seduction05/08/25 02:06 PM
3

If you're at peace with yourself, it'll translate to going out more, not worrying about rejection and so forth. Will women approach you first? Probably not, but that's irrelevant. Just work on being happy and being at a good place in life.
/r/seduction05/08/25 02:02 PM
4

No real limit unless perhaps it's been months.
/r/seduction05/08/25 01:56 PM
1

Bizarre question.
/r/seduction05/08/25 01:52 PM
2

Stop living in your head and live in the present. Go out, talk to people and have no expectations other than meeting new people and enjoying the company. If something comes of it, great. If not, no big deal.
/r/seduction05/08/25 01:51 PM
2

Light teasing is fine. Just don't overdo it or be negative in general. Millions of people do just fine without having a clue what a "neg" is and have never purposefully tried to tease beyond just very mundane banter. Don't make anyone uncomfortable and the moment you get a reaction other than a smile, laughter or something back, then cut it out.
/r/seduction05/08/25 01:47 PM
1

This is old PUA "pre-selection" as many of them during that era were incel types who thought it would make them look more desirable if women were seen with them in profiles. No. They'll just think it's a girlfriend, you aren't over your ex, or you posed with women just to try to look cool in photos. If it's mixed company of guys and ladies, then maybe. But the old PUA clowning of surrounding yourself with a group of women in a bar, club etc with their arms are draped all over you is total clowni…
/r/seduction05/08/25 01:30 PM
-1

Tell them what you're looking for. Be honest and direct.
/r/seduction05/08/25 05:06 AM
1

Be a gentleman, not a "nice guy."
/r/seduction05/08/25 04:01 AM
0

Out of curiosity, I took a glance at what Owen looks like now and he has the look of a Starbucks barista who eats all the bagels and pastries after closing the store. Not that his old anorexic, balding metrosexual look was any improvement.
/r/seduction04/08/25 08:39 PM
1

There's nothing wrong with being direct. Too many guys are conditioned into thinking a woman who is forward is a hooker or otherwise has bad intentions. But I've found some women are just extremely busy and if they see a man they want to go after, they'll engage first. Back in the days before dating sites weren't filled with AI bots and there were actual profiles to support the photos, I occasionally created an account to see what kinds of women would message first. I tried several kinds of prof…
/r/seduction04/08/25 08:23 PM
6

People often are confused what a "nice guy" actually is and that's okay. Just know in the dating realm it's more of the negative connotation of an insincere guy who intentionally tries to manipulate to get something in return. It's fine to be nice and a gentleman. In fact, I strongly encourage it. But don't change your interests, hobbies, beliefs and so forth out of insecurity in fear that someone else may not like you for yourself. It's fine to disagree on some things to work together and compr…
/r/seduction04/08/25 08:20 PM
1

OP, take a moment and re-read your own posts from this thread. You go to college and it's in a large city. Think about this for a second. You're constantly surrounded by women. Put your phone on silent and only take it out of your pocket to get numbers. Delete the apps and start actually talking to women in person. There are thousands around you every day. I swear, Gen Z have neither common sense nor self-awareness at times.
/r/seduction04/08/25 08:15 PM
17

OP seriously registered a new account just to ask about a "boot camp" run by the old school PUA clown Owen Cook? You'd have to be a sucker to pay $5, let alone $5000.
/r/seduction04/08/25 07:31 AM
2

I prefer regular old Facebook since it shows regular engagement with real IRL family, friends and business associates. I don't care one bit about tossing up a bunch of photos, so Instagram is a firm no. There's far greater congruence value in women seeing you actually having real friends and a career than just spamming a bunch of photos and being a nerd chasing follower counts or buying them. By that, I mean I'll get a woman's number and often I will add to Facebook for the congruence check. Mos…
/r/seduction04/08/25 06:20 AM
3

If it's a bar where you can simply just enter and hang around without having to be 21 to enter, then that may be your best bet. Be direct and honest about your intentions. If rejected, keep a positive attitude and continue to talk to others. Don't lie about your age. Maintain honesty even if seeking casual.
/r/seduction04/08/25 06:18 AM
2

People can change their minds after reflection. It's normal. Just because a few dates went fine from your perspective doesn't guarantee you two are going to be a couple. You may have a much more optimistic outlook of it than her based on a few hours of meetup. She probably initially enjoyed the time out but doesn't see you as boyfriend material. She's very likely talking to multiple guys and may occasionally send a bait text, but know that you may be several guys down the totem pole. Women often…
/r/seduction03/08/25 08:29 PM
1

Talk to women with the same laid back and carefree spirit as you do with cab drivers and guys. Quit expecting anything in return. Consider the experience of meeting a new human being an internal win with the only losses being not trying/talking at all. If you get a number out of the encounter, great. If not, who cares. Keep meeting new people.
/r/seduction03/08/25 08:22 PM
-3

You do you. But it shouldn't take several thousand approaches to find a girlfriend.
/r/seduction03/08/25 06:00 PM
1

You don't have to go to bars or clubs if you don't enjoy the atmosphere, don't drink, and don't like the noise. I retired from them by around age 25 and haven't missed going. There are obviously plenty of other places you can go after dark.
/r/seduction03/08/25 05:21 PM
1

Have you tried having your friends introduce you to single female friends? You say you feel way more comfortable with a wing. The best wing, by far, is someone she already knows and trusts. That's how I found my current girlfriend. Guy friends of yours that she doesn't know can make up any random bullshit about you and women know this.
/r/seduction03/08/25 05:18 PM
2

"I get more attention from older millennial men who im not interested in, i wonder if its cause i dress feminine and girly or they just might be desperate for younger women?" They're likely emotionally immature. I'm 34 and you'd have to pay me to babysit 22 year olds.
/r/seduction03/08/25 12:32 AM
1

Be direct anyway. Don't lead anyone on out of your own selfishness. Plenty of women will be looking for the same, but you should communicate it early on so you don't waste each other's time.
/r/seduction02/08/25 06:02 AM
4

I'd say don't. Learn to think better on your feet and adapt to a wide variety of different types of people and personalities.
/r/seduction31/07/25 07:01 PM
3

Don't take rejections personally. Know that approaching in general takes a little courage and by doing so you've proven to yourself that it's really not that big of a deal. People have done it for thousands of years. Not everyone will be receptive to you for any variety of reasons like your looks, your vibes and so forth. That's perfectly fine. Just keep trying as there's always someone out there who will appreciate it. You'll likely come off as nervous at first and that is normal. Just keep pra…
/r/seduction31/07/25 06:56 PM
6

It sounds like you're treating women like a game of baseball. Communicate with her, not us. If you only want casual, then tell her.
/r/seduction31/07/25 06:53 PM
2

People often get sick when traveling to new places. That's not uncommon at all. You may not be regularly exposed to the illnesses more endemic to that region. If it were by plane, then that's an easy way to get sick as well since you're packed together with hundreds of other people in a small space. Plus, traveling in general can really fatigue people. It sounds like you're overthinking it. Give her some time to unwind and recover. You're being insecure by thinking she's no longer interested in …
/r/seduction31/07/25 06:45 PM
1

It doesn't take regular activity to notice, nor is it difficult to tell when you message and there's instantaneous, overly enthusiastic discussion with someone who can't confirm or contribute to anything you're talking about on a local level.
/r/seduction31/07/25 02:59 AM
1

Don't try to "spike emotions" through text. Get her on the phone/face time. Just don't turn it into a long conversational vortex. Show her that you're a real person and then end the call on a high note in the conversation after brief banter. Save conversational texting for when you're a couple.
/r/seduction30/07/25 11:38 PM
3

PUA was an e-marketing scam and a movement within the toxic manosphere, catering to lonely and incel types. Don't follow it and let's move on from that terminology as it sets a bad framework from ground zero. As for OP, work on prioritizing your depression and Bipolar before jumping back into dating. I was married to a woman with BPD (often casually referred to as like Bipolar on steroids) and she refused to seek help; she became emotionally abusive and violent over time as her condition worsene…
/r/seduction30/07/25 11:21 PM
1

This sounds like satire.
/r/seduction30/07/25 05:29 PM
2

Not everyone's on the prowl for meaningless sex.
/r/seduction30/07/25 05:26 PM
2

Multiple people I know have dated or been introduced through the local rock climbing community and formerly through volleyball when I lived right off the beach. That's how I met my current girlfriend, via a climbing friend. Never knew her previously as she climbs at a different place, but we share the same friend group. It was an extremely easy transition into dating as she probably asked her friend who introduced me a lot of vetting questions. The best wing you can ever have is someone the woma…
/r/seduction30/07/25 05:07 PM
2

Indeed. 20s are the perfect time to really go all-in and grind in this kind of scenario. I added another challenge in my late 20s, marriage, that made career life more stressful. OP is still single and can pretty much devote his full attention to building wealth and growing business accumen. But dating is still on the table and tons of people OP's age are available in the morning hours.
/r/seduction30/07/25 03:24 AM
13

This is the OP's second thread on the same subject within 24 hours. You don't like the advice and so you're pretending like the other comments don't matter. The advice still stands. Keep your schedule. Suck it up and grind while you're young. 12 hour work days hit much harder at even 30 compared to 20. You could knock those out in your sleep now. Work hard, invest hard. Plus, you just aren't trying hard enough to lock in dates within your schedule. Mornings were actually my primary time slot for…
/r/seduction30/07/25 03:04 AM
0

Didn't care for them. I found my current girlfriend though the introduction of a friend, aka social/inner circle game.
/r/seduction29/07/25 09:13 PM
1

Your story was questionable and she called you with logical follow-up questions which likely did not match up with your posts. She has valid reasoning to dump you. If someone lies about something that trivial and insignificant at will, then you'd begin to question their credibility going forward. Your unofficial trust score just took a nosedive. In a best case scenario, she may not bring it up again. But she could be giving you an unmentioned trial run to see if you slip up again. Don't do it ag…
/r/seduction29/07/25 08:22 PM
2

OP, you're just using excuses to not put yourself out there. The city you referenced has over 100k people. There are plenty of people around you. Go and talk to them.
/r/seduction29/07/25 04:14 PM
1

Is that from a malfunctioning AI prompt? Those are bizarre lines.
/r/seduction29/07/25 04:09 PM
4

OP, you're only 20. Put all of your focus into building your career. Start building a nice portfolio where you're regularly placing money into savings, max'ing out your investment contributions, and reinvesting money into your business interests. You could really get a nice head start that most people don't do at your age. Wealth helps build wealth through time. You can have millions into your retirement starting now. Don't worry about your schedule if it's earning you good money. Those aren't b…
/r/seduction29/07/25 03:56 PM
2

A lot of this could just come down to recognizing the old PUA movement and then not using it. For those like the OP who once fell into that cult, work on deprogramming yourself through self awareness and catching yourself as you make those mistakes. I don't see any reason to just blast your insecurities to the world. But do be honest with women. If you're insecure about things like height, age, status and so forth, don't lie about them. It's extremely easy to disprove them regardless and you'll …
/r/seduction29/07/25 03:46 PM
2

There's a difference between being a gentleman and being a "nice guy." Don't be the latter. Opening doors is good manners as someone else said. Flowers are a personal call. I prefer to save them for when we're a couple or at least a few dates in; the first date may be a bit much and signaling you want something in return. Occasionally surprise her on days that aren't an anniversary, birthday or holiday and don't sit there and wait for signs of approval as someone mentioned. Let her be the one to…
/r/seduction29/07/25 07:33 AM
0

People who enjoy their career will tend to also enjoy talking about it. And even those who may not enjoy it much may still talk about it a lot because it's normal conversation. It's how people spend roughly half of their waking hours during the week for the most part. And one of the first, if not the first, getting to know you questions with someone is asking what kind of work they do. Totally normal stuff and I'll both ask a date about her work and follow-up questions to get a better idea. I li…
/r/seduction29/07/25 07:22 AM
5

It's not. Plenty of women love burly guys, wide shoulders, and so forth. We're not talking morbidly obese or an overhanging beer gut. But a lot of women do like the frame of guys who maybe don't diet or go to the gym much but have functional strength from working with their hands, being in the military, firefighter, etc. I've known women who outright express their dislike for lean and skinny body types. You just obviously should have your own sense of identity and not worry about what an average…
/r/seduction29/07/25 01:19 AM
22

These are highly variable. Plenty of women love dad bods. All women pretty much love financial stability versus an unknown work in progress. And unsurprisingly, most love to see a guy who can make her feel protected and safe.
/r/seduction28/07/25 10:42 PM
5

Preferably no live music because then it will be too loud for conversation. On a first date, you're both basically on an audition to be a potential couple. Somewhere fairly casual usually works unless you just feel like treating someone to a nice lunch/dinner. It's obviously up to you. Sometimes I'd go against conventional wisdom and go to a concert or out for a nice meal simply because I was in the mood for it and a companion for the night was worth the price of admission.
/r/seduction28/07/25 10:40 PM
1

Definitely don't show up to her workplace again just to see her. That would be beyond creepy. Also quit e-stalking her, even "anonymously." Ask for any socials if need be. If she doesn't reschedule for a date, then move on.
/r/seduction28/07/25 10:11 PM
15

Start now and continue to improve yourself along the way.
/r/seduction28/07/25 09:11 PM
1

As the old saying goes, separate business from pleasure. This can reflect very badly on your current and future career.
/r/seduction28/07/25 09:00 PM
-4

Are you a high schooler? Focus on improving yourself, not your "body count."
/r/seduction28/07/25 08:18 PM
1

The point is to move beyond the old stereotypes of manipulation, deception and "fakery" of the past. Don't do that. PUA is in the rear view mirror and that era of snake oil toxic masculinity has passed beyond the lore of people still finding The Game, MM and the small handful of clown ringleaders still running the pick up circus. By "seduction," think more along the lines of maintaining interest, surprising, keeping her on her toes. Take her on random dates when it's not expected. Spoil her on d…
/r/seduction28/07/25 06:26 PM
2

Approach in your spare time and preferably while you're already out. Don't obsess over it. Then when you find a partner, you can lay low. I was lucky this go round to find my current girlfriend through a friend's introduction.
/r/seduction28/07/25 06:19 PM
4

This. Most people tend to date others with similar political views and core values. That doesn't mean everyone, but most or around 75% to 80%. You'll have to decide for yourself and discuss these things with any women before getting serious to see how it may affect things going forward.
/r/seduction28/07/25 06:14 PM
1

Let it go. She's a friend of your family and it'll make things awkward for everyone going forward. In a best case scenario, she might laugh and give you a pep talk to find someone your age. Who knows if she'd mention the proposition to your family. It sure would be embarrassing when that becomes the talk of the neighborhood. All said, the chances of you two having sex is likely close to zero percent.
/r/seduction28/07/25 06:14 AM
1

OP, bars and clubs aren't for everyone. I hated them even in my 20s and only went out of habit for a time. You can obviously talk to women anywhere you go like stores, in entertainment zone areas and so forth. Join a few activity meetup groups as well. An overlooked aspect is using inner/social game. By that, I mean have your friends introduce you to women who are single. And try to become friends with women if you can. A friend of the woman vouching for you is so much better and more trustworth…
/r/seduction28/07/25 06:05 AM
1

She told you her boundaries and that she's seeking friendship. Do you want to be her platonic friend?
/r/seduction28/07/25 05:58 AM
1

Probably any public records sites with mugshots.
/r/seduction28/07/25 05:56 AM
2

It's out of my wheelhouse as I don't do casual relationships and don't like big dating age gaps. But I'd say be honest and direct as you would and should be around someone closer to your age. There are plenty of attractive mature women everywhere you go. The tougher part will be finding ones who would have any interest fooling around with a guy your age. Bars in general might not be a bad idea in this case. You could experiment and try ones in different locations like in the city, in the suburbs…
/r/seduction28/07/25 03:28 AM
3

You may also just fit into that mold. I didn't party in college and generally loathed going to bars and clubs. I only did It for a time because it seemed like somewhere I should go to meet women. But if you don't drink, don't like the shitty music or the loudness, then it's just not worth it. If you're only 20 and not in college, you can obviously still meet new people. You just may not relate to them as they wouldn't recognize a day of hard work if it bit them in the ass. They may speak, act an…
/r/seduction28/07/25 02:52 AM
2

You're in one of the largest cities in the world. Venture outside and meet new people. These kinds of posts are baffling. The times I've lived in major cities, it was quite easy to find similar interest groups and a neighborhood to become a regular with plenty of similar aged people. Just because your core friend group has moved doesn't mean you're unable to find new people to hang out with. And if you're nomadic, ask around where the locals your age tend to congregate.
/r/seduction28/07/25 12:40 AM
1

You're really reaching for loopholes, OP. I'd stick to LinkedIn to expand your career networking, not your dating life. It would likely come off really creepy for women to get asked out on that platform.
/r/seduction28/07/25 12:33 AM
3

You'd be wasting your money. Nearly all of those guys are no better than you are with women. They're just e-salesmen preying on guys like you to spend money and get on a recurring payment cycle.
/r/seduction27/07/25 09:13 PM
2

Money definitely helps, but many guys go about it the wrong way. Be responsible and don't look like a clown just to brag. The same obviously goes if you're faking having money. Pretty much every woman realizes you're probably broke if you pose with money in pictures unless you're an actual wealthy rapper or Floyd Mayweather. I know some really wealthy guys who go out of their way to not even allude they're rich because it can attract the wrong kind of women who just want to be spoiled. So they t…
/r/seduction27/07/25 08:14 PM
7

See the difference between gentleman and nice guy. Gentlemen still have a backbone and will not be nefarious just to get laid or get what they want. You can say no, disagree, negotiate and so forth. The point is to be yourself and not alter your personality to be deceitful. A nice guy will try to "think like her" and then manipulate to serve his own agenda. Too many times you read of guys harboring incel type behaviors where they said "I did this and tried to be so and so and she still didn't do…
/r/seduction26/07/25 08:52 PM
6

Good examples. You demonstrated that you're courteous and respectful to others but can also think on your feet and make sound decisions professionally without losing your cool. She'd also probably assume you would have natural protector instincts as well. Those will be attractive natural qualities to many women.
/r/seduction26/07/25 08:47 PM
5

Cold approach is still great. I wouldn't say on average it's quite as ideal as when you're in college or slightly post-college. Your priorities and dating preferences may change over time as well. For example, I realized in my early 30s after my divorce that I just didn't care to be around college aged people anymore and so I'd approach people at different kinds of places like organic markets, less college centric areas of entertainment zones and so forth. I'm a strong proponent of inner circle …
/r/seduction26/07/25 08:32 PM
27

You can be respectful and a gentleman without being a "nice guy." I see the nice guy archetype more as premeditated, calculated and manipulative ways guys will act to try to win a woman over for their own selfishness. He won't be himself and harbors weak inner game. Too many guys give a rather bland display of their natural personality because they're afraid she may not like certain aspects, or some guys will outright try to be a Tyler Durden type fake persona that is not how they act around any…
/r/seduction26/07/25 07:22 PM
3

Downtown entertainment districts tend to skew younger people right around OP's age and they tend to stay out later, like the kind of music in clubs, bars, etc.
/r/seduction26/07/25 07:08 PM
9

See them as equals to you, not better and not worse.
/r/seduction26/07/25 05:06 PM
276

Treat women like real people and with respect. Don't play idiotic games you read from an incel ideologue online that was regurgitated from a PUA salesman. Be genuine. Don't conceal your personality or be fake in any way just to try to win her over or get laid.
/r/seduction26/07/25 05:05 PM
38

Ditch the apps. All of them. You're in the perfect age range for cold approaching, plus it's a heavily populated and vibrant area.
/r/seduction26/07/25 05:01 PM
2

Leave her alone during that time.
/r/seduction26/07/25 03:48 PM
0

Wear earplugs. It'll protect your hearing and you'll be able to hear speech better as it attenuates much of the higher and lower frequencies out.
/r/seduction26/07/25 01:50 AM
8

Any guy who spends time researching age of consent laws in his 30s and 40s probably isn't terribly stable upstairs under the dome.
/r/seduction25/07/25 07:35 PM
-1

You also have no emotional maturity and minimal, if any, self awareness if your posts are any indication.
/r/seduction25/07/25 07:32 PM
1

How many women have you approached offline? How's it working out?
/r/seduction25/07/25 04:36 PM
2

I'm not sure what you're asking. But I'd say try not to worry about "tactics" and so forth. Communicate with women like normal people regardless if it's over text, calls or in person. Be genuine and congruent with yourself and your normal personality. I'd assume most guys don't play mind games with their guy friends and you shouldn't with women, either.
/r/seduction25/07/25 04:30 PM
3

Don't treat dating like you're playing a(n) RPG/video game. She's not an avatar villain on your screen. You have to realize many of the old PUA "gurus" were just salesmen who found a niche selling books, newsletters, seminars and boot camps to lonely guys. These guys were not particularly knowledgeable with dating, managing relationships, etc and evaded posting any actual proof of their successes. Many also had varying mental illnesses, in addition to a decent few in the PUA communities harborin…
/r/seduction25/07/25 04:17 PM
14

This. I was like OP and got married in my 20s. My ex was a constant drama queen who refused treatment for her mental illnesses, NPD and BPD. Unfortunately I rushed things with her because she was a "10" and I thought then that it was good enough as she was hot and had many admirers. I was so emotionally drained by the time we divorced that I didn't date the first year of the divorce; it was used to rebuild new self development, work out, etc. The first thing I noticed upon going on dates again i…
/r/seduction25/07/25 03:52 PM
16

You sound as immature as these kids.
/r/seduction25/07/25 03:31 PM
7

And she didn't. But cope your little heart out.
/r/seduction25/07/25 06:33 AM
10

Reflect on them with positivity. Don't think in terms of wins:losses. Dating is not like boxing; your record has no bargaining power and is not public knowledge.
/r/seduction25/07/25 01:27 AM
1

Can != high likelihood.
/r/seduction25/07/25 01:09 AM
7

No one said it's a "crime." But businesses reserve the right to terminate memberships if they deem you a liability under their discretion. They can also get you trespassed if you return after being explicitly told to not return, which could be an actual crime.
/r/seduction25/07/25 12:40 AM
1

Speak in whatever tone is your natural voice that you would otherwise use to talk to anyone else.
/r/seduction25/07/25 12:38 AM
3

No. The point was OP needs to learn from this and realize that women very rarely want to be bothered at a gym. Probably even moreso when it's a paid place where you are both a member / regular.
/r/seduction25/07/25 12:21 AM
25

I can agree with much of this. Gen Z are too soft and in general don't know how to talk to anyone without it being online / over text. You need to put yourself out there and talk to people in person. Venture outside. Put your phone on silent and only take it out of your pocket to put women's numbers in your contact list.
/r/seduction25/07/25 12:13 AM
3

Gyms are usually an unofficial kind of safe space for a lot of women where they can get in the zone and relax without being hit on or otherwise bothered. I don't mind when people randomly talk to me, but it's obviously much different compared to putting women in an uncomfortable spot where you are both members at the same place and may be around each other a lot in the future. That could make her really uncomfortable. It's different than if you'd approached her on any random street as you'd be u…
/r/seduction24/07/25 11:51 PM
-4

Someone smiling is not any kind of even remote guarantee that she's interested in you or wants to be approached. Keep in mind that if someone complains, they may give you a warning and then potentially terminate your membership if there's a similar complaint. They could probably blacklist you completely if it's a chain or place with multiple locations. Most women likely go to gyms solely for the workout and do not want to be bothered. Her wearing headphones was probably enough of a clue to not b…
/r/seduction24/07/25 11:26 PM
1

It'll happen with mentally ill women. My ex-wife has both BPD and NPD. Standing ground and enforcing boundaries would often lead to her getting further pissed off and violent.
/r/seduction24/07/25 11:23 PM
4

You get it. Don't follow these old 2005-2007 games from The Game and Mystery Method. Please don't grab someone's hand and jump into a palm reading routine just as an excuse where you can mentally high five yourself with "I'm kino'ing, bro." Be natural, less calculated and without the gimmicks.
/r/seduction24/07/25 05:40 PM
3

It needs to be congruent with your personality and lifestyle. If you like nice watches, wear them. If you like exotic cars, drive them around. If you like a particular haircut, rock it. You get the idea. Display particular styles and things because they reflect your genuine connections interests, not because you want to impress anyone else or because other people online advocate it. Don't try to be anyone you're not. The old PUA scene had so many guys who would try to copy people like Mystery an…
/r/seduction24/07/25 05:31 PM
2

Source: trust me, bro.
/r/seduction24/07/25 05:09 PM
3

It's usually easiest to invite to play volleyball. I lived in Santa Monica for a time and played a lot of beach volleyball. People were generally into it and it makes for good community rapport as well.
/r/seduction24/07/25 05:04 PM
3

Clients? What is this, the Epstein List? You do realize you have a brand new account with zero credibility, right?
/r/seduction24/07/25 04:57 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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