I think I've finally managed to pinpoint what holds me back in life, in my social life and in game : over-intellectualizing.

Whenever I feel ill at ease, anxious, lost, I go back to what I am good at in order to feel in-control : being intellectual, analyzing things, making meta-remarks, abstracting the discussion. There I am not afraid to be challenged. It's my defense mechanism whenever I feel threatened.

As you can guess, this is a buzz killer. Most of the time it makes me look socially inapt for not fitting in. It's weird for the girl when I make an overly complicated joke/remark because I didn't knew what else to do, to say.

So basically, my questions is this : how do I stop putting on that wall? How can I stop myself from climbing in my ivory tower and be overly intellectual when I am anxious?