Im a Chaser And I Dont Value My Self. Deep down i always feel like a chick. Im shy. I Hate my self. I Have low self confidence. And i feel like im in a trap Right now. I feel soo invisible i feel so pathetic.

Im a feminine guy. I used to stay home all day and night between age 13-15. I gained weight and didnt go to work or anything. I grew up with my 3 sisters and my mom and my dad and my brother were working. I wish i had someone to teach me things guess now all my own and your guys to help me. I always and even now see people as gods. Mostly girls. I can be a jerk but its unnecessary. I always seek for their approval/attention/affection. I wonder why people dont ask me questions or care about me or why only 1 girl ever from FB said she loves me. And i always compare my self how actors live or how their personality is or what girlfriends they can get and i cant. I dont need a girlfriend though. Im too much of a nice guy all my family members are. They are like noobs including me. Too much nice can cause you a lot of trouble like people calling me dumb or empty minded for being silent. Even a girl today in snapchat told me you dont know how to talk and i said its because i dont know much about you. People dont value me or respect me. I have talked over 5000 girls on past 2 years. Would talk to 20 girls at the same time and all would block because i was either boring or a pervert. And now i want to be someone who people dont see as nice or poor or pathetic. Its mostly how they see my brother and my father. My oldest brother is alcoholic so he doesnt give a damn about much ppl and can be like my brother and father sometimes. I want to stop being a noob in real life