Do not judge your success in life solely off your success with women. (Mainly saying it for myself because everyone goes through rough patches here and there) I (25m) recently broke up with an amazing girlfriend (23f) of 4 years because at the time I wasn’t happy with our sex life, I was resenting her personality, and her lack of confidence bothered me. She has since changed that all, not because of me, but SHE did that. Now mind you I’m still living with her. I have a work schedule that allows me to be gone for extended periods of time and then return for short periods of time. In the 5 months we’ve “parted ways” I’ve slept with 4 girls, gone on 6 dates, gotten to the point of a date with 4 others but chose to end the interaction. Gone to the club and basically had sex on the dance floor with 2 others. Approached 2 and flirted for the first time in my life. I’ve been getting a feel for the hookup life and have done things I NEVER thought I’d do in my 20s. While it is VERY fun in the moment the after affect of “trying to get your next fix” or trying to get with a girl whose even hotter or even thinking into the future about how you’ll ever find and more importantly “keep” your forever person. At the end of it all I’m still living with my ex who I now think I broke up with due to “the grass is greener” syndrome when in all reality it doesn’t really seem to be greener. Girls don’t just flock to you it’s a misconception that I had never experienced because she was my first relationship.

Now why am I bringing up all of these positive experiences? The moral of the story is that even with these successes I’m still feeling as tho I’m not enough to be loved and the one person who I’m still living with (probably the reason I’m feeling so shitty) is the only person in this world who could love me. Which in no way is true… if that was the case I’d feel bad if some guy who lives in China couldn’t meet his one and only because she happened to be placed in Iceland and he could never meet her… there are 3 billion other potential matches. Anyways, we men are unique beings, we really do have a lot of feelings and some of those feelings can take over if we don’t have a good grip on reality. We also rely heavily on instant gratification. I’m dating someone right this second; I’m happy. I’m sleeping with this hot girl but the second she leaves or you lay in bed with a date lined up later that week you feel like you’ll never make it in life when in fact you just had sex and have another date lined up. You’ve gotta remember that success in life is not determined by your sex life. I still still struggle to keep them separate. It’s about who you are as a person, your passions, your desires. Maybe these emotions are amplified for me because I’m still living with someone who I shared 4 years of my life with and we’re FWB now. I wonder sometimes if this is hurting me long term and I don’t even know it. Remember to keep your heads up and focus on you because in the end when all the sex dries up you’re left with yourself. Could you grow old with yourself if everyone in the world disappeared tomorrow?