There's this girl from college who I know for 2 years now. And after a while, we started going out with each other, but in a friendly way. At start, I was aiming at something more, but she seemed uninterested, so I was like fuck it, I'm ok with her having as a friend cuz she's fun. So basicly, I sucked it up, and supressed my emotions. (btw, she's super extroverted).

But man, every now and then, the emotions would come and go.

From the very start, she was quite open with me. She had trust from the beginning and was opening with her vulnaribilites from the begginning. I had no idea how to interpret this, I would just listened through all of it and gave a basic reply cuz I don't want to over-comment on a thing she's speaking from her heart. I would just say "that's tough" or "damn, that's fucked up" or whatever.

But she seemed to like me, in a way, she almost always hugged me when we meet. But in the beggining when we meet, she would just stay in a place not moving and I would be the one to hug her on kiss her on the cheek (which seemed like she isn't interested, but idgaf, I just wanted our "hi" and "bye" to be awkward). But that was just for a small period.

As me not giving a fuck, I would not invest much into going out with her and really treat her as a friend. I would take her on a big ass walk uphill to a favorite place where the sunset is really cool, where I remember commenting how "all boys are taking me to some cool places in the city, but you are taking me outside the cities through villages and through village roads". I was like ok, dunno what to reply. (I remember prior to that walk she was somewhere in the city and I asked her if she wants to come with me to the hill but IMMEDIATELY beacuse the sun will go down and I will miss out on the sunset. She went home and became ready pretty quick).

The thing that made me go off is that in the beggining she said that she's interested in boys are [insert body type] etc, which were completely different from me. So it was a bummer, but I accepted it.

Even a lot of people thought that we were dating.

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But, as time went on, she seemed to grew some attraction(or at least it seemes).She told me like how she's missing home (she's paying rent) and for someone to cook her lunch or whatever. I told her that my dad made me goulash and it's pretty damn good, and she said the next thing but in a very indirect and a bit unintelligable way: " tell your dad that you have a girl that wants to come to our flat" something like that which I completely ignored cuz we're friends. She's talking about kids with me where we both came to a conclusion that we want kids. And after some time she told me that she hasn't been having sex for some time. Then she asked me if I was ever in love etc.

On the sidenote, I've noticed that she takes a lot of fucking time to reply. Maybe I'm boring her? Dunno, but it definetely sent of a message of me feeling uninterested. Where I would eventually call her out on, because she intentionally didn't want to opet my message for more than 1 day. I said to her to cut the bullshit with that, and she was sorry and said she's was too lazy to reply. I'm like ok, and didn't initiate any convo for like 3 weeks.Until, she would reply to my insta story with "I miss you". I would reply with:" what have you been doing?" (noticing that she went on a trip). She would reply that she went on a trip and would ask "when can we go to drink coffee?". And I said when. She even made an excuse to another guy to not meetup with him so she would go out with me.

Now, before we met up, she used an sexual innuendo where I replied with one as well, she replied in a same flirty way and then our convo ended.

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Then from time to time, she tends to mention her past relationships and experiences with them which I have no idea how to interpret.

I'm seriously thinking of confronting with my feelings and telling her. She's a good friend. But I want to at least have something out of it or bury it. As I accept that there's nothing between us, I interpret something as a hint and my emotions start rushing and I stress myself over what could it mean. I want to move on from it at least. If there's nothing here I would seek out someone else.

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tldr: friends with a girl, but unsure if there's something more

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sorry for the long text