Need Help at bars/partys/clubs

recyclablebantha · 2013-06-18T12:33:15+00:00

When it comes to bars, partys, and clubs..... When i get into these noisy places, i'm always trying to start a conversation with a charming smile, but it's nearly IMPOSSIBLE with the loud music etc.

Here's the thing. You're trying to verbally open in a place that's built around a non-verbal activity: dancing. People are there to party and most notably, dance. If you go around trying to force a verbal exchange right off, you're interrupting the flow and then you have to work uphill to get anywhere.

The thing to do is open non-verbally. Someone already mentioned The Gambler's video on night game: he has some excellent pointers.

I don't offer to buy girls drinks unless we've already hit it off. (it's ASU college town, so tons of guys do it right away only to be ditched moments after.)

Yeah, I have never bought a girl a drink unless I was already dating her. I've had a girl buy me a drink, though. :P

So what do i do? I can't really dance, but i can make it look like i know how.

Yeah, you don't need to be an expert. You just need to be able to have fun. As someone who learned how to dance, I'm going to tell you right now, most people don't really have a clue so your level doesn't usually matter as much as how comfortable you can feel and how much fun you allow yourself to have.

____BRIEF Club Crash Course_____

Basically, you're going to go out on the dance floor and start enjoying yourself. (Note: it's key that you enjoy dancing when you're at a club, at least. Doesn't hurt at a party with music and dancing.)
Make eye contact with girls and force IOIs. They'll give you an idea of how interested they are.
If someone shows interest, you can either approach them or incite them to approach you.
Then it's time to have a dance conversation. You'll likely have early opportunities to kino escalate if you get this far. If you can be fun, she'll probably push for conversation later, in which case, obviously you could start talking to her. But it's just as likely that you could k-close and #-close (at a club, anyway) without the need for any words.

knoekie · 2013-06-18T13:05:43+00:00

I would still advise you to start talking. Try to avoid the "do you come here often" cliches, but it's always nice to start with a compliment. I think the best compliments are the ones that are specific because they sound more genuine. So don't just tell a girl she's pretty, but tell her that her dress makes her look stunning, or that her top is a perfect match with her beautiful eyes. This will give you a hint of her interest and if you'd think she likes it, try to dance a bit with her. If she asks you something back (no matter how silly) I think it's a save move to ask her what she would like to drink. I would suggest to do this at the moment when you just finish your drink.. So like you want to get something and only ask her because you two were talking. I always find it strange if a guy offers me a drink while he has a full one himself (a lot of girls do accept drinks anytime, but they are most of the time not really interested in you, just in the free drinks).

IPlayUkulele · 2013-06-18T04:45:38+00:00

Learn to love dancing and read about how do open, escalate, etc while dancing. Man, once you get out of your head, it's so much fun. You just have to fucking do it all out with no shame just once, and it's like it clicks. This is how I approach loud parties, and I have so much fun that I don't care if I close or not. People seem to be drawn to this.

thefountain73 · 2013-06-18T06:19:45+00:00

You are basically asking how to seduce women. The only thing I can say is read the sidebar material, and if you have already done that pick up "The Natural" by Gambler. His stuff is very bar applicable and should give you some ideas.

Title	Need Help at bars/partys/clubs
Author	br0c0
Upvotes	0
Comments	9
Date	June 18, 2013 4:42 AM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1gkeoo/need_help_at_barspartysclubs/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/need-help-at-barspartysclubs.1306325 https://theredarchive.com/post/1306325

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