Warning: Very long, not necessarily typical topic possibly. Feel free not to dive into this. Don't expect anyone to answer but insight might be helpful but believe me, in past decade I've heard all the basic tips and advice so please don't flood me with basic standard tips.

And let me say that yes, I have been working on myself. Back in March I examined things in my daily and weekly life that irritates or peeves me and either eliminated them, found a way around them, or just accepted them. A month ago I had a psychic reading and identified a few other things such as I need to laugh more. I've been working on all that, I really have been working on myself and am continuing.

It has been nearly twenty years (two decades) since I've had 'female companionship' and that wouldn't be so bad but my history before this dryness wasn't much (I figure a typical 21yo has had more than I). In the past whenever I was reminded of my issue I could ignore it since I was so deep in debt I couldn't even afford a McDonald's date. Well, now I am out of debt and doing pretty well. My typical monthly budget is about half my take home pay so while saving is important, I want to also use this extra money to help me date. Right now I'm at a very flexible in my life and what I'm looking for is to start a LTR, find someone that's into me and I her and try living together. Currently don't have a lease so if I did meet someone I could move whenever we got comfortable to do so.

Yet now that I'm ready to date, I understand I'll have to date several people to find someone compatible and that's fine - I just need to get that actually started. But I'm unable to relax and just be myself and have patience for anything to build or establish or such since for past few months I've been obsessed about getting close to twenty years without any such pleasure. And I can't ignore it as I could in past. Most days it'll just zip through my head and not really hamper me but some days it lingers and just clouds me up and makes staying focused at work hard. I honestly cracked the week before Labor Day and everyone is in agreement that I should take a vacation. I'm penciled in for first three weeks of November.

Back in late May I developed a multi step plan. I joined a dating app to actually look for a date. I'm a huge shy introvert homebody. Never really liked bars. I'm shy but once talking to someone interesting I can open to try to connect easily - but I'm still an introvert homebody, never really cared to get out much. I actually really expected to get at least one first date within three months yet here I am still at zero. Have chatted/texted with a few. But now the clock is really ticking because if I can't find anything here before my vacation - I'm going to Nevada to a brothel where everything is upfront, legal. Just I have no idea on pricing or actual situation there and that's hampering my ability to properly plan.

Now before that final step, another part of my plan is to become a semi regular known customer at a strip club. Sounds kinda fun right? They open at noon on weekends so say hit one from 1-3pm before crowds and get chatty with bartender and dancers and become trusted and seen as mostly harmless. Then pay for the service I want that they don't officially provide. I was needing relief a decade ago, at this point I really feel the pent up pressure is preventing me from casual dating looking for LTR to develop. I need to quiet my obsession. I don't even feel human anymore. So is it worth money directly for it? At this point for me I believe it is. But I still have not made my first visit to any club, there's several within fifteen miles of where I live and there's even more across the bridge in Tampa. But I figure one of the small ones near me would be a good start. You would think I would be excited but I'm not.

Quick note about me: I have had two flings and a one time hookup, so I have not had much sex and even fewer partners. While I desperately want to increase the amount of sex I have, I really have no desire to artificially inflate the amount of partners I have in my life. Right now I'm at three and honestly I would be fine if that stayed under ten and even at six - as long as there's some sex happening. So it isn't like I want to make a habit of paying for service, I just absolutely need to reset myself. I've gone nearly two decades so I imagine if I could have a two or three hour (or preferably overnight) romp that I could devote a year or two before any lack of it would hit me again. It would allow me to date people without any pressure for anything other than actually getting an emotional feel for them. And patience while waiting for dating to actually even start. And help me focus on emotional connections over physical attraction. And allow me to focus on work/life in general again.

Another friend has urged me to check out the Hard Rock. He is a gambler and has knowledge of casino life. I don't gamble, never really have. He figures if I went there and just floated around, had a few drinks at a bar and keep my eyes open that I would either be approached or notice someone that is likely a worker looking for someone in my situation. Since I do live in the area, it wouldn't be any big deal to go there for a few hours and it's open 24/7 so I could go any time. Yet I still have not. Been thinking about both Strip Clubs and the HardRock for months yet rarely leave the yard each weekend. I could go either place today or tomorrow and drop one or even two hundred over course of a few hours and just have fun - no pressure to actually engage anyone other than to order drinks. Yet I don't. I could even afford to follow up next weekend and spend the same amount and just aim for fun. Then go again but get a tad more serious about looking/finding. I can afford it and I'm not doing anything else... yet I don't.

While not surprising, the brothel I called could not discuss pricing nor services offered over the phone. Haven't called any others on my list, figuring it'll pretty much be the same deal. I'm not sure if I could get lodging at any of them, but hotels are just a few blocks away. Don't know pricing so can't really plan out what services I might want nor how long I could stay there. I was hoping for 2-3 days possibly 4-5... I guess it could just be one day depending on pricing. I mean, I'm budgeting a lot but that just might not go as far as I had expected. I'm not seeking top tier service, I'm not needing a 10 or even a 9. I imagine even near bottom tier service would be fantastic for me. But I'm clueless on any possible pricing structures they have. All their workers are independent contractors and I need to actually be there to ask much. I don't even know if they supply condoms or if I need (or could) bring my own?

I just hate unknowns, grey areas. While I fully expect I could/would have sex if I reached a brothel, I just would love to know what to actually expect beforehand. I've been to strip clubs (not lots, not a habit, but yeah I have visited many in my life on occasions) so I know what to expect when/if I do go - but I've never been to a brothel.

And then there are escorts. I've just recently started poking around at that option. What I've read, might have to do a couple sans fun sexy time to get established before the real deal is on table. I just don't have the patience for such (sounds more expensive than establishing myself at a local club) plus the whole thing looks to be a grey area. I'm not an aggressive guy and I could easily see myself doing a dozen and still be at zero. I feel I can give hints but I need a girl that can be direct, I just don't pick up on super subtle hints and I guess I want to remain a gentleman so I don't really act on mid level hints either. Yeah, I got issues and I'm pathetic. I just keep painting myself into corners it seems.

Yet now the clock is actually ticking - if I can't figure something out here one way or another, then I'll likely be driving 2,512 miles to go to a brothel come November. The good parts are I do enjoy the open road and it's been five years since I've had a road trip. One of the routes passes somewhat close to my hometown so on my way back I can swing through and visit family & old friends & importantly visit my parent's grave. I've visited it many times but not since both were placed there so I absolutely need to do that anyway within next few years.

What I would absolutely love is to find it here in next month and half, cancel the whole Nevada part and spend the whole vacation just going back to my hometown for a good long visit. But I fear that isn't long enough to become established at an escort service or strip club. I fear if I do find sex at the Hard Rock it wouldn't really be of the quality or length of time to really reset me. I did get a friend to ask around, my ex-supervisor. We got along great and she has a friend with a friend and might be able to direct me to an escort and kinda be established or known for the first time together. But the pricing shocked me. I knew it would be money, hell I've been keeping 400 cash stashed in my car just in case something popped up randomly so I could instantly jump on it. 600-700 per hour. My immediate questions is: if I want one hour of date and then two hours of sexy time would that be charged as one hour or two hours or three hours? And if it is just the date part and the other part is negotiated between the date and fun - then just simply how much cash do I need on hand? I don't want to have 3k on me when I only need 1k nor do I want the situation where I have 3k yet need 4k. I just want to know and be prepared. So even having an inside track to an escort, I'm not sure how to be prepared. And who's responsible for condoms? What I'm after will take several.

To warp up, I guess my primary question is if anyone can tell me what to expect at the brothel, such as pricing and if an overnight service is offered. Plus would brothels require cash? The area I'm thinking is near the NorthEast of the state, about eight brothels in three cities fairly close to each other. Also same with an escort and especially an escort service. From what I've gathered it'll be super important not to talk about sex at all until either the date starts or sometime during date or at end of date. I think I understand the casino situation, just I have to be super on guard for police stings against johns, how I'm not sure but it's a fear.

It's now about 4pm. On a Saturday & I have the typical weekend so work isn't till Monday morning. Been having trouble sleeping two of past three nights. Been up since about 8am, been watching Friends (hey, it helps make me laugh) and typing this after trying some more research online. Taking a nap and then possibly doing laundry sound better than going to a strip club or the Hard Rock. I think I'm broken.