So, why being physical with a girl is so crucial and how it can make or break the interaction?

Well, I will begin by saying that physicality in general, not only with girls, creates a lot of comfort, builds rapport, and generates trust. That is social physicality. Before trying to master sexual escalation, make physicality in general part of your reality. Start hugging people when you greet them, pat their shoulder or lightly touch their arm when you’re joking around or they’re making you laugh. Just touch them in a very friendly and casual way. You will see how that makes people more engaged and receptive to you.

Now let’s talk about what you’re really interested in, and that is how to be physical with girls. You start by doing what you’re doing already with everyone in a social way, and then you kind of shift towards sexual physicality.

And no, I’m not talking about groping the girl and touching her in inappropriate ways. That’s just sexual assault.

I’m talking about the physicality that shows you are interested which leads to sexual tension, a very key aspect of attraction. It shows you’re open and comfortable with touching, and you have no problem in making your presence felt as a man.

​

TESTING COMPLIANCE

​

But, before you’re trying to get more physical with her, you have to see whether or not you 2 are on the same page. How do you do that? By testing her compliance - because if she is not compliant to you and doesn’t trust you enough to follow your lead, and yet you push anyway, things can get really messy and awkward.

Let’s talk about how you can see whether she’s compliant or not. There are a few subtle hints you can pick up on through casual touching. She can respond positively - in which case she’s giving you pretty much a green light, negatively - it means she’s not yet on board with the direction you’re going and you have to take a step back, or neutral - which means you have to let more time pass without creating discomfort. I wouldn’t stress so much about the last one.

Let’s say for example you happen to approach a girl on the street and after a short while you introduce each other by shaking hands. Try and hold her hand a bit more than it’s “socially” accepted so to speak and see whether or not she follows your lead.

Another example could be the hand squeeze. Say you’re out on a date or something like that and you high five her mid-conversation and then you transition into holding her hand. At that point try squeezing her hand a little bit and see if she responds back. If she squeezes back, she’s on board with you and can continue leading her. If she doesn’t, she is just passive and there’s nothing specific you have to do in that case, just do whatever you were doing. However, if she pulls her hand back, take a step backward - it means you’re pushing too much. Just revert to being casual and chill, let more time pass and try again later.

A simpler way to put it is: if she follows your lead, keep going forward, if not, take a step back, let the time pass and the comfort build, and try again.

​

ESCALATION

​

Now that you understand how you can find out where she is in terms of compliance, it’s time to talk about how to move things forward. This is one of the big fundamental components of attraction. So how do you actually make the transition from being socially physical to being sexually physical? One word: PROXIMITY. Proximity that creates intimacy bridges the gap between a potential sexual partner and just a friend.

Whenever you see the girl being compliant to you, get gradually closer and closer and more intimate with her. Don’t be pushy, but be bold, take some risks sometimes and never second guess yourself. Don’t just wait 1 hour before you give yourself permission to touch her for the first time, because when you’ll do it, it will just be weird and awkward.

Keep in mind - get physical the right way in the right context. Be smart about it. Don’t just start a foreplay on a park bench if you don’t have the next place in mind where you can keep things going forward. In that way, you just may burn the interaction way too fast and that can break the chemistry you have. Cheers!

​

P.S: If you got value out of reading this, I'm willing to answer every pickup question you may have.