Intention --> Focus --> State --> Expression (DiCarlo's 4 Expressive States)

Anxiety

When first seeing a girl that physically is attractive to you, immediately the mind goes into this mode of self-doubt. You will challenge yourself by creating excuses to help fit your fear of not wanting to approach this girl. Excuses such as “It is too loud”, “she is in a group and I am not experienced enough in groups”, or maybe even the ever so common “she is so hot she probably already has a boyfriend or guys hit on her all the time and I have nothing to offer”. This is known as approach anxiety and it does not disappear. Every girl is individual in herself and thus for approach anxiety to go away you would have to assume that every girl you meet is the same, which we know is not the case. Accepting the fact that it will always be there is a key step, but is definitely a difficult first stepping stone. Now this does not mean that there is no way around this. False. There are plenty of ways around this. Some individuals may count to three or five, walk right up to the person, and engage in a hopefully beautifully charismatic conversation. Others may have more extreme methods such as doing a certain exercise if they fail to approach. And some go as far as giving a trusted colleague money and they get percentages of that per approach. A personal method I feel helps a lot is to recall all past experiences of approaching women and think about their responses. What is the worst that happened to you telling a girl she was cute? More than likely she either say thanks, smiled and blushed. I will talk about frame later, but with the right frame most girls will definitely love the compliment and from their you continue the conversation. That easy, no harm comes to you, you don’t suffer from physical pain, death, or really even humiliation because simply it is natural for men to be attracted to women.