A girl I dated for 1.5 months moved six hours away to study at college. On our last date before she left, I mentioned that she could view it as a "farewell," but she insisted on keeping the same level of contact (without really explaining what she meant). I took it to mean she wanted to keep developing what we had, and I said that was fine, but I also pointed out that she’d probably change a lot once she moved to college and experienced that new lifestyle. She came from a very conservative family that restricted her a lot, so she hadn’t had much freedom before--she’d even had to date me in secret. I also told her that if she ever felt our situation wouldn’t work out, she should let me know, since long-distance relationships (LDR) after only 1.5 months were unlikely to succeed. I emphasized that for it to work, good communication would be essential. She nodded, but didn’t say much.'

We kept in touch on Snapchat, and on the second day after she moved, I messaged her to see how she was doing. She responded positively, and I asked if she could call me later that day. She agreed, but the call never came. I didn’t want to seem needy by complaining, so I just let it go.

Two days later, she sent me a snap about how she was struggling. We started chatting again, and she seemed to be looking for validation, which I gave her. She seemed to appreciate the attention. I then asked her to think about a date I could visit her and to call me later that day after school. She said, "Okay." Again, no call came. Instead, she sent me a snap around 11 PM, which she knows is a time I’m asleep and don’t usually respond. The snap had nothing to do with the call she’d promised, so once again, there was no explanation.

Question 1: Am I wrong for letting this behavior affect me?

This behavior really frustrated me and started to affect how I viewed and interacted with her, despite my efforts to not let it get to me. I didn't directly address it with her, but I started backing off. The next morning, I opened the snap she sent--a video (she took from her phone) from our last date before she moved. I posted another video from that date as well as a response. Our conversation continued throughout the day. But I became less flirty and more distant in my responses. I also started waiting 30-60 minutes to respond to her messages, on purpose, whereas she continued replying immediately, as usual.

I didn’t bring it up with her directly because I was afraid it would make me seem needy. I chose to distance myself instead. But after all that, my frustration was still growing.

Question 2: Why would she not call but still send me snaps? Was she breadcrumbing me?

Four days passed with no contact. Then, she called me on her own initiative. Unfortunately, I couldn’t hide my feelings, and my cold attitude came through during the call. During our conversation, I indirectly mentioned that she hadn’t called me as she said she would, twice. She just brushed it off with the excuse, "I’ve been very busy," which honestly felt like a weak excuse and not very understanding. She also mentioned she might be coming home to the town for the weekend (to visit the family), but I didn’t respond positively or suggest we hang out (which is probably what she wanted me to do). I ended the call after about 15 minutes, even though she wanted to keep talking.

Question 3: How could I have handled this situation better?

I know the usual advice is to not get emotionally attached and to "move on" whenever a girl disrespects you. But when you’ve been dating someone for a while and they’ve shown genuine affection, it’s hard not to develop feelings and have certain expectations. In hindsight, I realize I probably should have ended things the day she moved away to avoid this predictable outcome.