Yesterday I decided that my self respect was worth more than continuing a relationship with a girl that I really liked. I ended communication with her.

Background On Tinder I listed every thing I wanted in a girl. It was all very specific. This girl, C, matches every thing I put (and another that I had not listed), and she messages me first (with a rather long message). After a few texts we set up a date. I tell her up front that I have a long distance gf (before our date). She says that she understands.

First Date First date goes really well. We spoke in Spanish the whole time. When we first met she greeted me with a kiss on the cheek. I was a little caught off guard and almost kissed her lips from the start! (I am use to this when I am in Latin American countries, but I wasn't expecting it from her since she is from the US). We chat and drink tea. After a while, I ask her if she wants to go walk in the park. She says yes. She asks if we should go in her car or mine. I say hers (This is a mistake. My car is a POS, but I still think I should of taken control of the situation). Then I don't know where any parks are that are not 20 min away (Again my mistake, bad planning). She suggests one near her work. We walk and talk for a while. I start to KINO escalate. She responds very positively. I tease saying that she is not a 'real' Mexican (her parents are both from México) since she doesn't now that in Mexico the guy has to walk on the side closer to the street. We get in her car and she starts to drive me back to my car. I say that we should rent a movie. So we start looking for a redbox near by. In the end she says that she has netflix. She asks if I want to go to her apartment or mine. I say hers since it was closer (Again. This was a mistake. I should of went to my apartment). fclose(). This went really well.

Second Date I set up a second date. We go to ride bikes at the park by my apartment, than she invites me to her friends house for a barbecue. Except they were all out of food when we arrived. Next, I take her to eat at the toco place (the one where all the 'real' Mexicans go). This place was great for our frame of talking in Spanish the whole time. We go back to my apartment. fclose(). I take her home in the morning and she cooks me breakfast. I ask to add her to may facebook (Huge mistake!). My facebook is filled with pictures of my gf. She get looks jealous.

The Stupid I start to get needy and send a lot of texts. Although she does responds to them it started to get out of hand. A couple a of times I ask her what she is going the same day and get rejected since she already had plans(made myself look weak and boring). We setup a date during her lunch hour at work. She takes the check and does't let me pay! I try a few times and decide not to make a problem over it. We set up to meet up Saturday.

Shitty On Saturday i send her a message asking how her event is going, and to remind her that we have plans. She is with a friend. I tell her that we can go to the park and play bocce ball, and that she can invite her friend. She say yes. but later says that she is still busy with her friend. I stop messaging her and I get another message really late saying sorry she was sorry she was 'busy'(yea I get it BS, she didn't want to see me). I realize that I need to stop being so needy, so I stop texting her for like 3 days. Then I send her a text and she says sorry again. We setup dinner plans for the weekend. I say that I would pick her up at 5. she says tat she wants to come by apartment instead of me picking her up (I really fucked up here. This put her in control. Leaving my waiting alone for her!). I said yes. Later she says we can meet at 7 since she wants to watch the game (Fuck I am just being run over... please give me advise). agree. I stop sending her texts since I don't want to be all needy any more. she sends me a text the night before the date saying "buenas noche mi rey".

More Shit I send her a text at 7:15 asking if she needed my address. no response. So I start to talking to my friend from Spain. She tell me to wait. So i keep waiting. I look up the game, yea its over. I call and leave a message saying that I hope nothing bad has happened to her, but we should cancel if I don't hear back from her in the next 10 min. At 7:55 I decide that its all over. I delete her from my facebook, unmatch her on tinder, and send her one last text saying to "forget about me, bye". I delete her from my phone. Now she calls me. She says that she was upset by me having a gf. I tell her that I want to breakup with my gf, but I have a trip planned to see my gf in 2 weeks. I am not sure what to do. I say that we should talk about it. She doesn't seem interested; She is watching another game. That was the last straw for me. She is out watching a game during the time she told me she was going to go eat with me. I send her a final text in English (i wanted to be 100% clear) saying that I was going to breakup with my gf as soon as it is possible. And that I am not going to continue any kind of relationship with her at all, ever. I wrote that I can't have people that don't respect me or my time in my life. I put that she is a wonderful person, but my self has to come first, and to top it off I asked her to please not contact me ever again.

Reflection Ending contact with her was the right thing to do. She stood me up 2 times (the second time didn't even text me a fake reason!) and she doesn't respect me (probably since i was acting all AFC). I have to respect my self. However this was hard. I felt like I was chopping my balls off and chopping them into a 1000 little pieces when I deleted her. I felt like shit all last night and this morning. But I now I just feel happy that I have my self respect. I know it was the right thing to do. I use to be a lot worse, and I am just happy that I am improving. Besides there are so many more girls that I can meet, there is not such thing as "the one". Hell, as I am writing this, another girl on tinder just asked me to teach her Spanish in exchange for her teaching me yoga.