Welcome to a brand new r/seduction webseries: SmellyJelly's thoughts on approaching. In this 10 part series I will give you my thoughts on approaching. Remember, these are just MY thoughts, so they may or may not work for you.

Thought one: Only approach from a place of power

Whenever you approach a girl, you must be the powerful one. By this, I mean, you must walk up to her head-on, have your shoulders square with hers, look her in her eyes, and calmly and confidently shake her hand and introduce yourself. If you can't do this, then don't bother approaching at all.

Don't approach a girl from the back. Don't talk to a girl if she is sitting and you are standing. Etc... A big mistake I see is guys talking to girls sitting at a bar. The girls will be sitting and the guy will kind of be "sidling" to them. This is bad because the girls have all the power; they can literally turn their heads whenever and end the conversation. In fact, one thing I do when I'm talking to a girl at a bar is if there is a stool I will subtly sit on the stool while she is still standing - that gives me the position of power.

I've been out with PUAs before and a lot of them have this attitude of "approach everybody and at all costs" attitude. So they literally approach every single girl, and they do so in un-powerful ways. They grab the arm of a woman walking by, or they bend down to talk to a girl sitting on a chair, or they will even motion to a girl sitting far away to come talk to them. These approaches MAY work, but the percentage of success is much lower. If you look into a girl's house and have her in the "zone" her biology immediately starts reacting to you like you're the alpha male.

Also, don't put yourself in situations where you are powerless. For example, a lot of times at clubs I will see girls at a private table I want to approach. But I don't, because the guys that bought those tables might kick me out. I just don't ever want to be in a situation where I am powerless. Ideally, I would OWN the table, and not vice-versa. I want to be as cool, confident and calm as possible in every approach.

Finally, your words have to be powerful too. When I approach a girl I always go for "Hi, my name is X." That is the most powerful approach because I make it clear what I want - a relationship (doesn't have to be sexual, sometimes I just meet friends). A lot of guys are afraid to be so direct, so they hit her with a "line" - i.e., ("do you know who this DJ is" or "OMG I just saw a guy with an Abraham Lincoln tattoo!"). These lines can start conversations sometimes, but girls take what you say literally. If you say "do you know who this DJ is" they will answer you and move on. A lot of times when you do the un-powerful approach, you have to follow it up with a real approach after that.