Friday night I went out and got fucking hammered. Lost my phone. Put me in a shitty mood Saturday morning, so I decided to say fuck it and go out tonight and have fun no matter what.

I got to my favorite bar around 11:30 PM. I paid the cover and got in while the free drink specials were on. Having just lost my phone though, I made sure that I was more careful with my drinking. I've been getting absolutely shit-faced the past couple weekends, and I need to stop. There was live music, which was fantastic for getting me into the mood I needed to be in. I was able to dance on my own and not feel pressure to interact with anyone because they were all concentrating on the bands and it was so loud.

Pretty quickly, I noticed two different girls giving me strong eye contact. One white girl, maybe HB6, and a Korean girl, HB8. Honestly, the Korean girl intimidated me. She is exactly the kind of girl I'm interested in -- she was high-energy, fun, and out-going. The white girl was much more reserved and withdrawn. I took the easy route and opened the HB6 after the band finished. We made some bullshit small talk about how long we've been in Korea, the band, where we're from, etc... but the next band got on pretty quickly and having a conversation just wasn't happening. While the second band played, I could tell she was dancing unnecessarily close to me, but honestly, I wasn't that interested. I was more into rocking out to the band than bothering myself to hit on her just because I felt obligated to open/burn a set to the ground.

The whole time the second band played, the Korean girl kept eyeing me, dancing with me for a quick second before turning away, etc... It only made me more into her. I went to the bathroom after the second band ended. HB6 disappeared completely. The last band went on and I just danced without interacting with anyone. The Korean girl was super into the last band and I could overhear her telling her friend how awesome they were.

When they were finished, I super pussed out and just left the bar. There was another music event I wanted to check out nearby. I went to the second bar for one beer and left. I wasn't feeling the music and I still had the HB8 on my mind. I went back to the first bar and as soon as I saw her, I went over and approached her. "What's your name?" That fucking simple. Lesson: Say fucking anything. It doesn't matter at all. Immediately, we started dancing together. I made sure to kino from the get go with hand holding, my hand on her waist, lower back, pulling her in close when she spoke, etc...

She did a lot of push-pull on me. She'd come in and dance up close to me, grinding her ass or legs onto my crotch, then spin away. I just had a lot of fun with it. I'd spin her or pull her in close. Always smiling and singing along to the music. Occasionally, she'd say something out of the blue, like "You're cute," or "I'm not easy," or "I know [how] American guys [are]," etc... For the most part, I ignored them and just kept the energy high and fun.

She broke away for a moment to talk to her friend, and a minute or two later, I saw her going to the backstage area with one of the band members. To be honest, it fucking stung. I thought things were going well and I felt a pang of jealousy that she was going off with some other dude. I could recognize the problem with my inner game -- outcome independence and abundancy issues -- and I resolved myself to forcefully ignore them and have a good time. Lesson: We're all human. We feel emotions. Sometimes, you just have to recognize that they're unjustified and fight your way through it.

After ten minutes or so, she reappeared and started dancing with her friend. At first, I wasn't sure what to do. I didn't want to immediately approach her and seem like I was chasing or clingy. I waited a couple minutes until she moved close to me, then I turned my body towards her and engaged her. She was still as into me as before and we picked up right where we left off. Lesson: Don't punish a girl just because you had a beta flair up. I had no reason to be mad at her just for talking to some dudes. She didn't owe me anything.

A lot of the same again. A lot of push-pull on her part. A lot of just fun energy on my part. Again she'd say shit out of the blue like "Forget about me tonight," and I'd ignore it. She did ask where I lived. I felt like that was an opportunity to bounce her from the bar, but I didn't take it. I did, however, isolate her and get her upstairs where I could talk to her properly without screaming or pretending I understood what she said when I actually had no idea.

Once upstairs, we started talking about random shit here and there. She commented on how much she liked my tattoo. She even kissed it, which was adorable as hell. I explained that I'd like to see her again and she said she was interested. All night, in the back of my mind, I had been wondering what my end game was, considering I had no phone. I certainly didn't want to just give her my number and hope she'd contact me. I told her that I would like her number, but I can't take it, so she opened up her e-mail and I sent myself a message so I'd be able to contact her on my own terms later.

She went back downstairs really abruptly to talk to her friend. I went to the bathroom and as I came out, she was leaving. She said goodbye and told me she'd send me a message. I was a little disappointed I didn't get a kiss, because she played it very coy when I would get close to her face.

It might seem lame to some other people, but I feel like this was a big win for me. My sober game isn't very strong. When I'm drunk I don't have problems approaching, but sober I have a lot of AA. I was glad I was able to nut up and talk to this girl, and then have the personal fortitude not to get too discouraged when she did her own thing. Logistically it wasn't he best because of the unusual, but it's still a lot better than not having talked to her at all.