Disclaimer: Being a successful at picking up women is a byproduct of being successful in one's own life (whatever that may be). Not the other way around.

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What brings me here is because I have not been able to control when my game surfaces. I've been with very beautiful and successful women in my life when it has been 'on'. However, most of the time it's off. I need help flipping that switch more reliably.

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Basics

  • 35 years old
  • Decorated military veteran
  • attend prominent university in Philadelphia
  • artist and designer
  • can be utterly nonsensical, silly, philosophical, or serious. Got a whole spectrum going on.
  • father (child lives with happily married mother)
  • apartment consists of a mattress, a coffee table, and an art desk
  • neurotic
  • argumentative
  • not concerned about appearance at all (ie; i don't look like a college student)
  • virtually all dating success comes from online
  • mixed race (so i'm not mr. whitebread)
  • really set on asian/indian women
  • wants next relationship be something that lasts for as long as it can
  • barely go out due to school/homework
  • will stop talking to a girl on the spot if he sees too many short emails and/or instances of 'lol' as a substitute for actual communication

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Since I've been down here in Philly in the past year I've hooked up with about seven women. One was a relationship. Others were just FWB. But none were anything that made me feel like I maxed out. I just looked at them as a way to occupy time and not be sexually frustrated.

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I've probably been on about 5 more dates that didn't go anywhere other than the typical 'job interview' type of dates that seem to be common down here. I don't enjoy small talk and dating rituals. I'd say though that out of those 5 that went nowhere were more women that I felt a stronger desire for than most of the 7 I've been with. Figure that out.

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Everyday when walking to school I see about 20 women I'd marry on the spot if looks were the only thing that mattered. All young college girls going about their daily routines. And of course my university is just packed with options. Our library alone is enough to make my mind melt every time I enter.

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So what is your advice to mid thirties man, who is completely non materialistic, is very straight forward, does not enjoy small talk, primarily dates online (OkC, Tinder, PoF), his whopping 4 IRL approaches during the past year resulted in 1 number from a woman who wasn't that interested and 1 with a boyfriend. I am not looking for any specific age range of women but school puts me in proximity of younger women all the time. Whenever I think of approaching one I can't escape that they see just some older creep. I understand some of them will think this no matter what but also that some of this is also just in my head.

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I'm not good at small talk and come off as very intense at times. The reason I've been successful online is because I can write messages that are represent who I am, win or lose, without filtering it through a charade. However, I would like to translate my verbose, philosophical, written, musings into what I understand to be 'daygame' or solo 'sarging'. My preferences towards asian or indian women are not born out of a fetish but if I am to be honest with myself truly say, "You deserve the best.", then they are the best; they simply are on another tier of beauty, attraction, and allure. Anything else seems like I'm settling. "Oh this isn't the garlic roasted mushroom steak you wanted but... hey... these fried spicy onion pork chops are just as good." No. They are not.

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Thanks in advance.