Im in college been dating this one girl since the literal start of the year 1st of January thats when i made my move. shes cute, considerate, feminine i want to give it a shot. cut to today i went to the college for an spoken exam we were taking at the same time we both pass, go and get lunch after. I start teasing her and her feminine energy excites me so I ask her wanna spend the 14th with me. she says no, i ask why, she says shes not ready for a relationship doesnt want to hurt me and crap along those lines. keep in mind shes texting me paragraphs everyday wanting to talk with me going out with me, whilst we were together after the exam my hands are all over her she enjoys it. after she said that i tried to make sence of it and tried to get to the real reason keeps repeating the same stuff quickly I give up and say fine you are a big girl you know whats best for you. i get the bill and she drives me to the bus station cause i live in a different city she asks me 20 times if im mad i say no she asks me if we can still stay in touch be friends i say doesnt work for me the 21st time she asked me i say im just disappointed not mad she says she’s disappointed in her self wtf does that even mean. we get in the car do you want to drive for a bit i say no she takes me to the station. she didnt let me pay the full bill and gave me money for what she ate i leave the money in her car when we arrive she tries to hug me i shake her hand. im in the bus just in my feels feeling not enough feeling like ill never be enough. she starts texting me i dont reply still havent. i was so ready to commit now im in my bed super tired but cant sleep. thinking should i get her flowers on the next exam in 3 days call her over to talk give her the flowers explain why i like her explain my feeling because i didnt today tell her sure this is what you are feeling but this is what im feeling once im done telling her and she is looking at me all cute and with anticipation should i lean in give her a kiss she wont forget get in ford truck and tell her im free on the 14th maybe you should give me a call am i just fantasizing or will something like that work on her im not big into seduction i dont even give compliments that often or at all. all i know is i wanted her to be mine and now k feel like shit.