Validation

motherducker · 2012-01-10T15:59:41+00:00

Realizing that you crave that validation is the first step, so you're on your way to fixing it. Now that this subconscious need has been brought to your conscious attention, it's just a matter of time before you break old habits.

Once you are comfortable and confident with yourself, you won't need to seek validation.

I've gotten over my need for validation from women, but with that I've realized how much I look for approval from my friends (particularly the "alpha" in the group). I feel much better now that I've realized it and can actively change it.

2012-01-10T22:51:48+00:00

As for books- The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle

You need to meditate and be in the moment and that will definitely help. Establish a good enabling belief system that will help you.

2012-01-11T03:00:03+00:00

Shit i do this all the time.

2012-01-10T06:06:19+00:00

In my opinion, the biggest problem guys have with validation is they feel the need to CHV (construct higher value) rather than DHV (demonstrate higher value). The key difference is of course the demonstration aspect. Which is where you show them higher value rather than simply laying it on the table and saying look at me.

For example, I speak Japanese fluently but never use it in conversation with Japanese women until I need to. Once they hear it, they realize that I speak quite well, and are usually quite impressed. I never force it on them though, I only demonstrate it when I need to. The same goes true for anything you might use to impress someone with. If you want to read extensively about the subject, check out the following:

http://www.tokyo-pickup.com/articles/modern-man-destruction.php

http://www.tokyo-pickup.com/articles/motivated-reasoning.php

http://www.tokyo-pickup.com/articles/cognitive-relativity.php

http://www.tokyo-pickup.com/articles/what-do-you-worship.php

2012-01-10T06:08:27+00:00

Oh and as for books, I can recommend my own:

The Cheat Codes to Seduction, available at: http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/114073

Cheers, Fluffy

Title	Validation
Author	sallywicked
Upvotes	11
Comments	6
Date	January 10, 2012 5:36 AM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/oah1f/validation/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/validation.1326792 https://theredarchive.com/post/1326792

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