Dnd is a hilariously fun hobby for a number of reasons. The biggest reason is having a chance to shoot the shit with the boys, and laugh at ridiculous situation/ problem solve for hours. The bigger the group = the more friends you make. Yet somehow my bae doesn’t care.... Conversation last Sunday
Her: you go every Sunday for 5 hours, it’s taking up too much time! It’s obsessive and unhealthy, and it’s not responsible, you are an adult!
Me: how is hanging with friends child like? You hang out with friends. Text, phone calls that last hours. Hell , if we calculated the total time you take every week to watch Netflix (she uses my account) I know for a fact it’s more than 5 hours.
Her: you can keep trying to compare those things but they just are not the same. You need to learn to grow up or no women will ever want you.
Me: how is Netflix different than dnd. Oh wait I know. Dnd involves socializing and problem solving skills. Using your brain instead of just mindlessly watching content. Dnd trains you to be more of a problem solver. Trains you to lead or work well in a team. And I form bonds with people I could have for a lifetime! How many times has Michael Scott invited you over to his condo, and helped you escape depression? Oh wait. None. Because Netflix is for the stupid anti social people who can’t be bothered to socialize. ( I don’t think this. But I wanted to show her what she sounds like ).
Her: I CANT BELIEVE YOU JUST CALLED ME STUPID BECAUSE I ASKED YOU TO GROW UP . WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?! I can’t believe we are even having this conversation. I shouldn’t have to explain to you why DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS is for CHILDREN! My GOD we could be getting stuff done on Sunday. Going on a date or something, but that’s fine. We don’t have to date anymore. Date your friends. stormed out crying
Haven’t talked to her in a week. She’s usually the “you need to text me” type. But I honestly don’t want to text her lol.
Edit. Months ago she literally told my MOTHER about her distaste for the group. And my own god dam mother parroted back the same arguments she uses about “growing up”. She went on to say it’s “not worth losing her”. Like god dam. I work a full time job. I barley have time to do anything fun. My dads the only one who supports it. And he’s big into sports and football and argues that it’s essentially the same thing.
Update: Boys. I got all my stuff from her apartment. Pretended to be all lovey dovey. I even mentioned cutting down the dnd hours to 1 day a month. That got me into the apartment. Spent some time there. Got my stuff, got my car , and broke up with her over text. Blocked her on everything. It’s done. I also positioned a camera on my car outside my door, just in case. Thanks for making me see the light.
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This is not a relationship sub, you already know the answer.
She is poison, not only in her own head but her attempt to bring your mum into it. She doesn't like it because you get a lot of enjoyment out of it without her and she can't control it. Tell her to find someone else more generic. You've got character, don't let that slip away as you get older.
"What people refer to as nerds or geeks, all they really are is people who are passionate about what they like, and aren't afraid of it. To me, it's very frustrating when people are discourage from being enthusiastic about things. This idea of the geek, or the nerd; all that person really is - and I would consider myself one - is someone who is not ashamed of liking what they enjoy."
That is a quote from Andrew WK. I post that as someone who's interests are motorbikes and sport - more traditionally 'cool' things. Don't let anyone tell you what you should be interested in.
Another from him. I understand DnD isn't your 'dream' but it's still relevant:
"Don't you dare say anything to him about giving up his dream. You're not the right person for him. Never ask someone to give up on their dream just so you can feel more stable. It's his choice and his choice alone, no matter how ridiculous his dream may seem to you, or to society, or even to himself. Dreams make humans into self-realized individuals. Your only responsibility is to love everything about him, including his dreams. The idea of "making this work" sounds more like a way to make his life more boring and predictable. At worst, it's a genuine sadistic desire to control someone else because your own life feels out of control — or a cruel need to dominate and break someone's spirit for the sake of your own peace of mind. Look for stability and peace of mind inside yourself, and not in your relationships or the dreams of others."
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