Her (at 30): I am 5’3” and 189 pounds of pure love. Have three kids by four fathers. Tattoos over 50% of my body, no job, no money, deep in debt because “abuse”, oh and I have low sex drive. Have had MANY sexual partners but the fun times are over now. Looking for a man:

  • Makes over $100k
  • Large peener (tee tee)
  • Nice house with min 5 bedrooms
  • Wants and has no children of his own
  • Tall, over 6 ft preferred
  • Handsome and ripped abs
  • Ivy League MMA fighter preferred
  • Perfect in every other way because I KNOW MY WORTH.

Her (at 40): I am 5’3” and 195 pounds of bisexual freedom. Have four kids. Don't worry - no dads in the pictures. Tattoos over 70% of my body, no job, no money, deeper in debt because “abuse”, oh and I have no sex drive. Have had MANY sexual partners but the fun times are over now. Looking for a man:

  • Makes over $200k
  • Large dick men only
  • Nice mansion with min 7 bedrooms
  • Wants and has no children of his own
  • Tall, over 6’2”
  • Handsome and ripped abs
  • Perfect in every other way because I DESERVE this.

Her (at 50): I am curvy, so if you hate real women, swipe left. Have five babies, pregnant with twins. They are my world. Tatted biker grandmama (woot woot), love to have fun - walk, read, eat, pray love, pumpkin spice late (because I am different than other girls). Done with the players - ready to settle down. Looking for a man:

  • Has a job
  • Has a car
  • Has most body parts
  • Accepts me for who I am
  • Does not judge me by my past, (I mean, who even does that in current year? shrug emoji)

Her (at 60): I am fat, old, and hate men. Must love cats. Lots of cats. Fuck you. Give me shit. #Fur_babies_rule.