OK, it's been around ten months since I found trp and started reading. I'm still very fragile mentally, I have phases of confidence and then I'm back to a chump. I lift 3x (strong lifts) and do karate 2x a week. I find myself being constantly reactive and worried about what others are going to think of me or how little power I seem to have in a social circle. My mental game is totally off, I'm insecure, paranoid and I seem to have more off days than good ones.
Gents, how do I turn myself into the person I want to be? I've been deluding myself all along it seems, believing I was well on the way when I just seem to regress so easily.
I've been reading the good books, and I'm still brittle as fuck. I come off as an asshole sometimes trying to overcompensate on the beta side of things.