Difference between hard and soft next?

vandaalen · 2015-01-03T09:15:45+00:00

A soft next is a limited period of time, where you become unavailable through cutting contact, and is mostly used as a tool of disciplination and education for the woman, to teach her that there are options.

A hard next is the end of a relationship in any form. You just delete her from your life, pretending that she has died. You don't even bother telling her.

I.e. she is producing an unreasonable amount of drama at a social event and refuses to comply with your request to tone it down and behave properly.

You would then make her leave the location with you, take her home, staying silent all the way, opening the door of the car and making her leave.

The next two weeks you won't answer any texts nor calls. If she comes up with an acceptable excuse, which clearly shows that she understood, where she went wrong, you'll establish contact again after those two weeks and then explain to her, that this was the one and only time you are going to excuse such a behaviour.

If on the other hand, she fails to do so, or repeats that behavioural pattern, you will just hard next her.

fnordsnord · 2015-01-03T08:07:57+00:00

The "soft" next is also called the "fade." You just stop initiating contact. If she hits you up, you may or may not respond. This leaves the door open to reconnect if the circumstances that caused the "next" ever resolve in your favor.

The "hard" next is where you unfriend her from all your social media, delete her contact information from your phone, all your chat information and e-mail information and do not respond if she contacts you. This is generally reserved for bipolars, drama queens, and cheaters.

abcd_z · 2015-01-03T09:46:55+00:00

Black Dragon's guide to the Soft Next

RedBigMan · 2015-01-03T17:05:16+00:00

Soft NEXT is for punishment and training purposes. You end up withdrawing your attention and validation so that she may self-correct any behavior that you view in a negative light.

Hard NEXT is when a woman has proven to be incompatible or has disqualified themselves from your bedroom. For me this would be something akin to being a sperm jacker apologist or flaked on plans with you without a good reason.

The difference between the two is that the former has a chance at redemption in your eyes while the latter is basically writing them off entirely.

Title	Difference between hard and soft next?
Author	hellhound1021
Upvotes	6
Comments	6
Date	January 3, 2015 7:55 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2r6rrn/difference_between_hard_and_soft_next/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/difference-between-hard-and-soft-next.144902 https://theredarchive.com/post/144902

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