I'll try and condense the story as much as possible... I was in a 3 year relationship with a girl I thought I was going to marry. We lived together those three years and we did okay I guess. She was just really dependent. She didn't have a car so I had to babysit her in everything we did. I was doing my undergrad at the time and she had just graduated. The first few months she sat at home, not working, and would complain when I got home. I snapped at her and told her she has no room to complain when I go to school and pay for everything. This should have been a sign but I pushed on because she just wasn't the type to ever cheat, which I assumed is all I needed.

I told her to get a job, to which she did. She was going to apply to graduate school but I guess decided not to and just work for a bit. She had the choice of working a low paying job but establishing a good network for graduate school or picking a higher paying job. I told her to stay in the field and I'd cover the shortcomings in financial situations.

For three years I raised a child. When I finished undergrad I got accepted to graduate school. I ended up moving and told her she had to figure out how to survive on her own. Told her to get her damn license, to get a car, to find a better job. I even offered to have her live with me until she built up some funds. I offered to pay her first month's rent but after that she was on her own.

You know what this ungrateful cunt did? Said it was over. She literally used me for 3 years and the second I focus on myself she is done. I had fought so hard, invested so much, telling myself one day it would be "worth it." One day we'd both be doctors and living comfortably. Now she's going around telling everyone how shitty I am. She's spreading lies. Telling everyone I was cheating on her (I did towards the end of the relationship, but she doesn't know that), and generally making herself the victim.

I am depressed. I am sad, missing the "good times." I thought she was "the one" and I put so much effort in to making it work. I'm pissed because I felt I wasted 3 years, I felt like I lost all that time, money, energy in this ungrateful bitch. And I'm trying to stay focused in grad school but I can't shake this feeling of isolation, forever alone. I'm 30 and feel like I'll never have a family. I feel like I'll die alone. I just need to vent. I needed to ask for help. I honestly am terrified. I'm scared I'll fail school, I'm scared I'll end up broke and in heavy debt, I'm scared AWALT. That's a jagged ass pill to swallow. How can I reframe to being okay with living and dying alone, without a family?