It's all about attachment theory.

Attachment theory summarized states that the way adults form relationships is heavily influenced by their relationships with their parents. And they develop patterns, 4 in particular. Secure, avoidant, anxious, and fearful.

People with a Secure attachment pattern are well-adjusted, neither getting clingy nor pushing people away.

Avoidant types fear being smothered and feeling vulnerable, so they don't respond well to clinginess or prying - many guys have a streak of this if we're honest with ourselves.

Anxious types are similar to the proverbial girl with daddy issues. They fear loss of intimacy and rapport and overcompensate. Many women are like this to one degree or another.

But the ones that really fuck guys up are the Fearful types, who contain shades of both the Avoidant and Anxious styles. Most often they're so far to the Anxious side of the spectrum that they start displaying Avoidant tendencies.

Here's some other signs, particularly with women but surprisingly enough many men will display them too:

Overcontrolling, emotionally restricted mother, and weak and/or distant father figure. Daddy issues, but with a twist. It's also not uncommon for them to be closer to the father than the mother, but still resent the father's pattern of inconsistent or negligent reinforcement.

In women, they tend to be reasonably feminine, with a strong, often repressed masculine streak underneath. In men, the reverse - Mystery from The Game is a classic example.

They collect orbiters, almost compulsively, and often to compensate for being in a one-sided and/or on-off relationship themselves.

But back on topic.

If you've been following so far, you see that the anxious pattern leads people to want to chase. That's why it's true of many women, but certainly not to the same degree. Anxious people lack the Avoidant tendency to fear intimacy and as a result eventually lose interest when they have to chase too much for too little. They're the kinda girl who will have a FWB style thing with you, but leave when a good, not even necessarily better, relationship prospect comes along. The Fearful type will allow herself to be strung along for years.

The reason why we're focusing on the Fearful type is because they're the kind that compulsively chase one-sided relationships. These are the girls that will start scheming to put you in the friend zone as soon as give them more than a morsel of validation. That dump you to go back to a shitty ex. That are unreliable partners and give men bad experiences and bad expectations of women. They play out their own personal neuroses and smart men learn to avoid getting caught up in it at all costs.

But if you're stupid and want to sleep with one of these types, it's actually not that hard once you understand them and why they do what they do. The secret is to never give them any validation unless they've earned it. And usually to an excessive degree. So long as you hold frame with these girls, they'll stay in their chasing mindset and chase you. But if you start treating them too nice, like a girlfriend, or like you're a sure thing, or God forbid be vulnerable with them, it'll kill their attraction for you. This happens because she likes and wants the idea of you, not the reality. The reality of most guys just triggers her resentments and contempt for all the disappointing and weak men in her life.

This is true to a lesser degree of other women as well on the Anxious attachment side of the spectrum but the more well adjusted they are, the less disciplined you need to be. Healthy relationships don't work like that, where one person is constantly chasing. But neurotic people are trapped in a pattern and can't stop - often because they're not actually aware of it, or repress the things that motivate them play out that pattern.

So on that final note, if you encounter one of these Fearful types in the wild, and you give a damn about her well-being, don't make the pattern worse. Don't be that guy who intentionally or not, brings out the bunny boiler in her. Don't string her along, even though she'll often unconsciously want it. Help her to become aware of her pattern and support her in correcting it. Don't be either her chump or her pimp, that's a sucker's choice. Many women can waste the best years of their lives playing out this self-defeating pattern and loads of guys unintentionally make it worse by enabling her, one way or another.

This is how you leave her better than you found her.