I wasn't going to post this, then I read another guy's thread here about depression, and it hit a note with me.

Background:

I'd been more seriously dating a girl recently. It had become exclusive for me, but I didn't need to tell her that. She's great all around, almost everything I thought I wanted. I didn't fail to use what I'd learned from seduciton research, but ... well maybe I'd become complacent? I doubt it, though, I think it was just factors outside of my control. She basically gave me the "I didn't mean to be talking to other guys, but it just kind of happened and I want to see where it goes with this other guy." shit. I have to drop her after that, even though I really got to like her.

So I felt shitty and a little sorry for myself. The one girl that I'd recently started to feel a real personal connection with just played me. Yeah life sucks. Then I realized that something was already done about it.

1. Have other friends. Preferably some with romantic potential.

This might need to be sacrificied if you're married. Otherwise, you sure as hell better have it on your private table. Exercise it and it's an immediate realization that there are more girls out there. ALWAYS have a short list of good friends of your target gender that you can talk to and straighten your head out. That doesn't mean to dump on them. Just get into a conversation and forget about what you thought was a major issue a few hours ago. Yeah I chatted with a couple of girls tonight, and have plans to hang out with one in a couple of days.

They don't have to have romantic potential. A healthy heterosexual male will have several close male friends, a couple of them older and wiser. Impose on them. Not often, but maybe once every year or two, if you have something serious come up, you need someone you can call on.

2. Don't neglect physical care for yourself!

Exercise regularly. Moderate to heavy resistance training is best, if you can pick only one thing. But rounded fitness (speed, strength, stamina) is best. Run fast in intervals, lift heavy weights, and do someting for an entire half day at least once a week. It helps your brain chemistry directly, and helps you emotionally.

Tonight, I Was going to go to bed pissed off at the world because of some really short term nonsense. Instead, I talked with a couple of friends and found out they were doing some insantity workout. I can't run (old knee issues), but I teamed up for some of their exercises and kicked their asses at core and overall strength. Not only did it get that negative energy burned in a positive way, it gave me an instant confidence boost. It's also going to make me sore as hell tomorrow, and I'll enjoy a BMR and testosterone boost tomorrow and the day after.

3. Have other hobbies. Nothing connected with romance.

I was fishing. Spent most of the day doing it. And I'm getting decent to good. Sure there's other stuff I'm good at too, but I'm doing fishing right now. Sure, you think it sounds dorky and redneck. Anyone can play too cool for school and dismiss anything with "oh that's lame". And what do you do? Read PUA manuals? No, get your ass out and do something at least arguably productive.

It doesn't matter what it is. Garden, fix houses, fix cars, shoot paper, hike. Whatever. As long as it's at least a little physical and requires your brain, it's going to help you now when you're depressed, and before that, so you have a rounded life outside of that one girl you're getting attached to.

So here we are a few hours later. I'm still frustrated over this girl. It's not going away magically - I'd really invested some of myself into the relationship. When you have significant personal value, that isn't worthless. But I have other relationships and habits close to me that demonstrate clearly to me that my life is much bigger than that one relationship. I have other close friends, I'm in good shape, and I have stuff to do outside of romance (hell, outside of seduction). This is all in the "basic" inner game texts. Don't answer me directly, but think about it for yourself: What are your personal maintenance habits?