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View 1 posts and 6,772 comments by Sardonis70 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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13

Question for BluePillsardonis70/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/16 07:10 PM
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Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
3

Why? 50/50 joint custody and each parent supports their own lifestyle. If mom has a shitty apartment and dad has a nice house, maybe the kids will figure out which life choices pay off and which don't sooner. As long as they have food and a roof in both places, there is no reason for child support.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 09:27 AM
2

Maybe men aren't vindictive enough to do so regularly. My ex offered to pay support and I turned her down. She couldn't afford it and still have money to spend on the kids when they were with her. I wanted them to enjoy time with mom more than the extra few hundred a month she could give me.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 09:24 AM
3

In your world does believing in equality make up for fucking other men's wives? It's laughable that you claim moral high ground on squat. You are no better than the men you bash. In fact? Most of them aren't getting laid at all so likely doing far less damage than you have.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 09:06 AM
5

Nothing else you say means shit after that That's rich coming from you at this point. Wanna tell us more about how shitty marriage is with your admitted history of home wrecking? Pot meet kettle. Enjoy the company.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 08:33 AM
1

Nope. That man is responsible for his own hate. Skinny is responsible for fucking his wife and leading him that way. And that man's wife is responsible for breaking her word. Further, I wouldn't even be pissy about it IF he didn't make a habit at poking fun at men for being insecure over guys EXACTLY like him. Again, I don't respect RP men that shag married women. But they completely understand the issue and acknowledge it instead of using it to put other men down. Doesn't the left say guns kill…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 08:20 AM
1

It's 3am and I'm using an iPad in bed. Sue me. He can call out misogyny all he wants but I'm not listening. He's no better than the men he's bashing in the grand scheme of things in my mind. Honor killings? This is a thread about marriage, and his actions may have directly led to the end of them by his own admission. So no, far as I'm concerned he has nothing to say on the subject I'm willing to listen to. I don't care if he hates misogyny. I'm just enjoying the fact that if its true, he is his …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 08:08 AM
1

You don't know many women that tanned heavily in their youth? Some of the "roughest" looking women I know in their 30's were constantly tanned in the summer months. And many went to tanning booths and whatnot in the winter months. Wrinkles are an understatement in some of those cases.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 07:59 AM
3

Thanks. I constantly struggle with that damn word. You are missing my point. As an individual it is disengenuiois to call someone out on "bad behavior" when you yourself behave in ways that directly promote that behavior. No there is no excuse for hating an entire gender, and I'm more than happy to discuss that with someone that's honestly making the argument. But I'm not gonna bother if that person FULL well knows why some men go that route by their OWN behavior. Am I going to discuss the merit…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 07:47 AM
1

I reread the article but I'm still not convinced. My POV on my participation in housework is directly correlated to the level of "clean" I'm willing to live with. No more, no less. If my wife wants a higher level, she's gonna have to put in more effort. Full stop. I don't care if she does 2 more hours of housework a week if SHE wants to, but it's not on me to split that if I'm satisfied without it. Put another way, I'm only willing to split housework 50/50 to a certain threshold and past that I'…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 07:39 AM
3

I'm over it. It's not cheating I'm taking issue with, it's men bitching at other men for misogyny while banging married women thus giving ammo to men to be misogynistic. Bang who you want. Again, RP dudes banging married women completely understand the misogyny. Sure I have self control. I don't consider myself a misogyist despite the label being tossed my way. I'm calling out the utter hipocracy of crying about misogyny while participating in behavior that promotes it. Walk the fucking walk if …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 07:30 AM
1

They do less housework why: Is it because they care less about the state of the house? I just said I do housework, and as far as I'm concerned I do my fair share. If my wife feels differently she can do more, or be content with putting in equal effort and the result we get from it. My wife thankfully isn't the type to freak over some dirty dishes, so we don't have issues. On occasion, she gets a burr up her ass and decides to go full into cleaning projects and I leave her to it. She may say that…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 07:17 AM
3

Like I said, my mistake for debating in good faith. Keep on bitching about misogyny while your own behavior promotes it. You proved AWALT better than most RP men ever could. Good job.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 06:59 AM
1

I don't think this attitude is representative of men on the whole, however. I can't say. All the married men I know (and I'll add in my age bracket so late 30's through 40's) do housework. To what extent and how it's divided I can't say, but I've shot the shit and drank a beer while they loaded the dishwasher or folded towels. They've seen me elbows deep in the chilli pot after I made a batch of paint peeler (I like it spicy!) too. I honestly haven't seen men talk about housework being "women's …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 06:55 AM
1

TRP as in the sub? I seriously struggle on this because in my mind TRP =\= Red Pill past being one part of it. But again, anyone ever involved in an affair has no leg to stand on bitching about angry, bitter men. They are partly the cause of that anger and bitterness. If they truly gave a shit about it, they'd stop banging other men's wives. Blue pill my ass. The real BPers should be offended.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 06:00 AM
3

It's been a rough week so I'm more block headed than usual: what is the brand being hated? Is it calling a spade a spade? How the hell can a guy enabling married women to cheat NOT understand how that can lead men to misogyny, anger, and bitterness? I get some bloops have never seen AWALT in action. Some environments are certainly more conducive to it than others. But come on! If you banged a married woman that wasn't your wife, you've seen it up close and personal. Denial is bullshit at that po…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 05:51 AM
3

I'm actually just trying to figure out how any guy that has ever gamed a married women into sex isn't RP by default. There is no better example than that for why RP exists. And that's setting aside women with "boyfriends" even though they seem valid examples as well, I figure you can't poach what no one has claimed.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 05:38 AM
2

That's far too granular for where I'm talking. We, as a country, are embarrassing as hell. Abundance for some, little for others. We want to save the planet but can't even support our own people. We want to police the world and can't even police our own streets. Marriage decline is a drop in the bucket, but a symptom of a larger problem. I'm not looking to shirk responsibility for my stupid choices. I'm looking for everyone to own theirs as well. I'm not holding my breath.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 05:26 AM
1

We are really stretching the definition of benefit here, lol. Sure, it's nice we have a matching bed set. I'd sleep just as fine on mismatched sheets. Do I really "benefit" from my wife's desire for decoration, or do I simply not care and tolerate it in response? (Full disclosure: I reserve veto rights on anything like that so I don't end up sleeping in floral patterns or pinks. I would certainly not benefit from that) And really, was it beneficial to have a maid clean up after you? Maybe you wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 05:15 AM
1

Where is the opt out of all button?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 05:07 AM
5

Nah this isn't me having a "purple" moment. This is me realizing I give some people here far too much credit on good faith debate. I'm chuckling to myself over this. I love seeing people's true colors.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 05:02 AM
1

He was unemployed for almost a full year. His ex actually begged the judge to not jail him, because there was zero chance he could pay from a cell. He was supposed to have visitation that weekend and she found out because the court called to let her know NOT to let her son go because they'd be picking him up the next day. I'll admit he's the only case of this I know personally out of all divorced men I've known. And I'm not saying he was the model of ambition when it came to gainful employment. …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 04:59 AM
1

I never once in my entire life in my first or current marriage put "gender role" pressure on my wife to keep a clean house. I'm perfectly able to sleep with a load of dirty laundry sitting idle, or a half loaded dishwasher. I'm not saying I'll let it pile to the ceiling, but I prioritize my sanity over small a crap like that. I really don't like to toot my own horn, and this is going to sound like boasting but whatever. I am NOT the best when it comes to cleaning, because I don't care past not l…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 04:44 AM
1

I have never once seen a woman living in her car from divorce. I've never seen a woman put in jail for not paying child support. (While unemployed mind you). I have seen women in shelters with kids, but that was due to abusive assholes, not necessarily the divorce that soon followed. If they have children and she gets primary custody, he's walking away with less than she is, even if they both lost something. And he gets to pay for the privilege of seeing his kids less.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 04:27 AM
1

A lot of this seems to be a larger problem than sex and relationships. It's leading to questions of modern identity, and tackling those? Where would you even begin? I agree and I wish knew. Right now my struggle is making sure my kids are solid enough to navigate all this, so it's not easy for me to be objective. I also can't relate to the "incel" influx. And by that I mean, guys that seem hell bent on STAYING incel while continuing to complain about it. I came to RP looking for ways to do bette…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 04:19 AM
1

Been a rough week. Doesn't change the fact that just because a man isn't "rich" doesn't mean he has nothing to lose. In fact? I've seen poor dudes crushed by divorce. Guys with money suffer to be sure, but they don't end up living in their cars too often.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 04:11 AM
5

Honestly? Disappointed. And amused as hell you can't see your own part in where we are. At least Red dudes that fuck married women tell other men to NEVER get married. I don't respect them any more for it, but they aren't hypocrites.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 04:09 AM
1

If living longer is the measure of "benefit"? Sure. But are they as happy as they would be if single and perhaps dying sooner? You seem to believe living longer is inherently "better" but I disagree. A shorter but more fulfilling life seems to be better than a long and unhappy one, again depending on the metric you use. Maybe those men lived longer but miserable lives. And I'm not arguing men don't get anything from marriage. I'd be saying I'm a dumb ass since I'm married. I wouldn't be married …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 03:57 AM
1

I really can't speak to TRP. I know there are guys here that moderate it and I assume they do what they feel is best for the sub. I'm of the mind real Red Pill is taking off the training wheels and rolling your own brand. Maybe I'm just a non-comformist. I'm not laughing at anyone right now. I'm as concerned as you and many others, I'm just not convinced RP or even TRP is the problem. If anything I believe they are symptoms of the problem at best, and most likely one possible way to mitigate the…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 03:48 AM
6

This goes right to my shared morality discussion elsewhere in another thread. You want me to see your position as the "right" one but are unwilling to honor a vow I made with my wife by simply keeping your dick in your pants? Fuck that. You are part of the problem. Your attitude is exactly why many men don't trust women. YOU proved they shouldn't each time you disregarded someone else's vows. YOU are partly why AWALT exists as a term. Are you proud of what you had a hand in creating? Troll some …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 03:32 AM
1

Women often get overworked and lack good rest when married. So in many ways, mothers tend to take rather shitty care of themselves. Sometimes husbands don't help enough, but I've seen plenty of examples where NO amount of help would get momma off the ledge. In the US it's common for men under 25 to pay a higher car insurance premium UNLESS they are married. The assumption being: married men tend to drive safer. (NOTE: this may not still be true, and car insurance varies widely from state to stat…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 03:25 AM
1

That's because married men probably tend to take better care of themselves and take less risks. Fathers know they are worth more to their children alive. Doesn't mean they wouldn't be having more fun dying sooner.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 02:56 AM
1

Find a smaller pond where you are the "big fish" and own it. The average guys best chance at "stardom" in mating/Dating is finding a niche market and exploiting the hell out of it. How do you become the big fish? Maximize your natural attributes and figure out which women think those are attractive, and go where they are. That's your pond. Trying to be "Chad to all" just isn't possible for most guys. Being "Chadlike" to a subset of women is about as good as it gets. Situational alpha sums this u…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 02:43 AM
9

Every time you fucked another man's wife, you possibly pushed another beta shmuck one step closer to RP. You've seen AWALT in action, been the cause of it in fact, but deny it here? Yeah, you aren't a hypocrite at all. To hell with marriage 1.0. You proved RP right every single time you stuck your dick inside a married woman. Hence: hypocrite. And? Part of the problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 02:25 AM
4

One more criticism -- some of the "loss of traditional marriage" lament comes from a different corner than the men you identified here. The thrust of this argument is that the loss of traditional marriage results in societal resource allocation away from being productive citizens and towards doing useless shit that gets you laid. I'm not sure I fully buy this argument but I definitely think there's something to it. I mostly fall into this camp. Men are wasting time and effort learning to be "hot…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 02:17 AM
6

went through several years at exactly your age where I only hooked up with married women or women in LTRs. So you're a hypocrite and part of the problem? Priceless.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 02:02 AM
2

It was all they had, as little as it was. A wife and a few kids is all some men can ever hope to show for themselves since they aren't tearing up the corporate ladder. Take that away and they've got nothing. But that's cool since they didn't have much to lose anyway. /s
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/17 01:30 AM
1

Do you really need to stay till one die before it can be said to be ok succesful? If til death do us part is the metric then yes. Additionally, this metric does not concern the happiness of the individuals in the marriage. They can figure out for themselves how to be happy with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/17 07:41 PM
1

So because they have less overall it's OK if they lose it all? Kinda harsh don't you think?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/17 07:32 PM
2

Yep thanks. I can't deny any of that and I won't try. Who controls "morality" is the real pickle. I completely understand that fear, but again that is not a problem with morality, it's a problem with "people" and how they interpret and practice morality. I left the Catholic Church largely for the same issues you have with "religion" I suspect, but I didn't stop believing in "do unto others" because the Church is run by flawed folks. I don't need to believe in God to understand the value in treat…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/17 06:42 PM
2

Yeah makes sense. My family didn't come here until well past the Civil War, and to a large extent when I learned about it in school I never saw myself as a "white oppressor" or anything because my thoughts were "that is some British shit right there", meaning I never considered myself part of that "group" of white folks. I know it's self centered of me, but I can't help but point out my family WAS NOT HERE during that shame, and as such I won't take blame nor responsibility for it. I don't want …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/17 05:57 PM
2

My idea of a Greater America includes much of that morality minus the racism to be frank. In my opinion we tossed out the good parts with the bad in a rush to "make things better" and landed in the fire from the frying pan. It wasn't the morality that was broken, it was the people practicing it that were. My family wasn't living the American Dream in the 50's. They were struggling to get an economic foothold like so many other immigrant families. To the best of my knowledge my Polish ancestors n…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/17 05:45 PM
2

The worst in all of history? No. The worst in American history? I'm fairly ashamed of us right now, so maybe I'm biased.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/17 05:29 PM
1

rock stars? If that's their takeaway, they are suffering from "everyone gets a trophy for showing up" syndrome. Personally, when I figured out I was the problem? I didn't feel very special at all. I don't know why any man would feel that way, when RP makes it clear the fault is their own. Or, at least RP used to teach that. Maybe not so much now?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/17 05:28 PM
3

So because we were more moral in the 1950's morality is a "white" thing? Why are you making it about race? I won't deny America was once more WASPy, but I don't see why that makes morality a "white" thing at all. Look, I don't care what banner it flies under, be it religion, politics, etc. I'd ideally prefer a country with a relatively United idea of what is Right and Wrong, regardless of the color of skin or lineage of our citizens. To me religion was simply a means to an end getting folks to a…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/17 05:23 PM
6

I don't give a rats ass how much better we have it now compared to cave men. That has NOTHING to do with the world we live in now and where it's going. You're arguing with the wrong guy with the Christian slant. Unless you consider an sense of morality to be only a Christian trait. I see "decline" not from a perspective of color, but from one of morality. I don't care what color you are, or what you have between your legs. Moral people are moral no matter what the packaging looks like. Fucking c…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/17 03:13 AM
6

Believe it or not I'd prefer to avoid a collapse actually. I'd much prefer my kids and their kids grow up in a time of prosperity instead of whatever the hell this is. I'm not enjoying any of this. And ya know, maybe some of us are here bitching now so NO ONE can ever say "I told you so". Why the fuck would I enjoy "the decline" when it's coming would be more disastrous to my kids than me? I "wish" we could collectively get our shit together, but reality and history tend to indicate that isn't t…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/17 02:48 AM
1

I sleep great alone or with a partner, as long as there is room. A king bed is large enough we can sleep without touching, but truth is we tend to snuggle often on and off through the night. Wife gets cold, slides close, sucks all my heat up, and rolls away. No Stuffed animals here. But we do have some fancy assed pillows that match the bed set. They go on the floor most nights. Only thing on our bed is sheets, a comforter, 4 pillows, and our two asses. I find sleeping with my wife to be very co…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/17 06:22 AM
1

I've been in one. Never again. I have no use for a "relationship" without a healthy sex life. I'd rather be alone not having sex than sleeping next to a woman and not having sex. At least alone I have the entire bed to myself, and I'm not tortured by the thought that she's within reach but it's not happening. Again. For another night. Like the last 3 months of nights. It is what it is and I was clear up front this time: no sex, no marriage. I've got little to lose walking out the door now, so ze…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/17 05:58 AM
2

My point being male participation in college is dwindling so even IF college guys are getting laid, there are less of them. As to who TRPs target demographic is? I'd say it's far larger them "men attending university".
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/17 05:17 AM
2

Lack of common interests? No. Mostly a few overlapping interests have been more than enough in my limited experience. As others have said, common values are in my opinion far more important.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/17 11:06 PM
1

The real rub going "fully digital" is that indeed you need a fairly beasty PC to run it all on. I'm using a PC with 8 cores and 16 gigs of RAM and and a LOT of disk. So far I haven't taxed it too hard, but I've had it up over 50% total utilization when running a LOT of tracks with a LOT of effects on them. OH! I have an old Kurzweil "electric piano" with weighted keys! I don't use it for recording because frankly its HUGE and HEAVY, but its plugged in and setup in the family room for anyone that…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/17 08:59 PM
2

MIDI cables are no longer used as much because today's keyboards will transmit the same MIDI signal over USB into the interfaces that are commonly used such as Presonus. Yep precisely what I meant. Truth be told? I have zero actual synths now and only have USB MIDI controllers. ALL my syths are virtual instruments these days. And I simply use an adapter to record "real" instruments directly into the DAW. Although, I even use some virtual guitar amp emulators since its MUCH cheaper than buying a …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/17 08:45 PM
3

AHHHH nice! I was gonna ask if you were using "classic" gear since almost no one actually uses real MIDI these days with all the virtual digital audio workstations and virtual instruments around. So instead of actually running MIDI cables all over, you just virtually "connect" your instruments. MIDI was so buggy back in the day, I don't really miss it. I forget lots of folks use it for other purposes than to get old synths to talk to each other. LOL
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/17 08:36 PM
3

maybe one of my values is MIDI or something. MIDI - Musical Instrument Digital Interface? You into electronic music? :P
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/17 08:31 PM
15

I have no complaints in my current marriage. Sure, I'd "like" to be having more sex, but reality dictates otherwise. However, I do NOT consider that a "problem" to be solved, and as such it does not diminish my overall satisfaction level. It simply gives me a goal for better long-term time management.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/17 08:27 PM
4

What about men NOT in university? Isn't male participation in "higher education" dwindling anyway?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/17 07:31 PM
1

I married an ass guy and if I'm honest I still don't totally understand it. Early on I don't think my wife fully believed me when I tried to explain how hot I thought her ass was. I've convinced her, so now she just says I'm crazy. Yep, crazy for dat ass.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/17 03:49 AM
9

A. I'd rather self limit my options than share my wife.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/17 02:14 AM
1

The point is to me, wider hips and a bigger rack far offsets a few stretch marks. And saggy boobs are still fun to play with. And if you as a man can't imagine staying attracted to a woman that ages or gets stretch marks from giving birth, maybe the family/monogamy thing isn't for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/17 01:46 AM
1

I'm assuming a guy he described as a "manchild" isn't an alpha or even a beta fux. So Not likely RP.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/17 01:39 AM
2

I've never been the type of person to look for physical perfection, even though sex is important to me. I don't need "the ideal" to be sexually attracted, and past that threshold other attributes are more important to me. In practice I see women around that are objectively "hotter" than my wife. But I still think my wife is plenty hot, and every time I look at her butt I remember how much I enjoy... Let's just say our sexual history together adds a bit to her "hotness" level to me. AKA "wife gog…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/17 09:50 PM
8

To an alpha, his mate is his property. Exactly this. Chasing another man away isn't about my concern over my wife cheating, its making it CLEAR that he's stepping on my lawn. If he insists on continuing, I'll treat him as a trespasser and act accordingly. So in a way, my wife (as a person) has nothing at all to do with it. He's in my space, and I want him out.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/17 07:45 PM
4

They don't expect children to have sexual urges and the same goes for manchildren. I'd say the "issue" here is seeing them as "manchildren", but I do see your point. So, the rub is: if a woman does NOT view any particular man as a "sexual being", she may feel grossed out by his approach? Wouldn't the logical solution be for women to just assume ALL men are sexual beings? Isn't that primarily what RP men are told when they say "women like sex?!" Why yes, yes they do IF she thinks you're hot enoug…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/17 07:14 PM
2

That's why when men say "I'd love to have that attention from nonoptions" women are going to say "really?" From a man's point of view, that would be great, but from a woman's POV, it's not. Sure that makes sense. I'll tell you though, I have been hit on a lot by gay men, because a guy I've known since 1st Grade "came out" in his early 20's, and I spent a LOT of time with him going to bars and clubs to support him. Of course, being as I was in their space, they assumed I was one of them, and they…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/17 07:10 PM
4

Its all matters of degree. If the intent here is to show that men are solipsistic on this, I'm probably going to just bow out. Sure, we only see things from our perspective (male) and you only see things from yours. (female) I'm not of the mind that having a pissing contest about who has it worse will bear fruit. I think the better idea would be to find both male AND female "pain points" in the SMP, and find common ground to resolve them. But that's far too reasonable for most folks.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/17 06:51 PM
1

OH yeah, no doubt about that! I remember a few guys stating they liked to find the "young and confused" ones. I suppose they are the gay equivalent of "Chad the virgin smasher".
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/17 06:49 PM
6

gettign your dick sucked by a man if your enot gay is exactly as much an "option" for a straight man as dating/fuckign a man to whom she is not attracted as a woman, therefore it is both an "option" and an "advantage" for the straight man to go get hit on by 10000 gay men Except that whole sexual orientation thing getting in the way... Do you honestly think incel men wouldn't just "turn gay" if it was that easy? Further, its pretty clear that some men WILL turn to homosexual behavior when pushed…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/17 06:45 PM
4

OR EXPECT Women should "expect" to be approached by men that find her attractive. Its how things work for the most part, even in our liberal enlightened world.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/17 06:40 PM
6

You're not explaining how this is "advantageous" to women, or how these nonoptions hitting on them are any different from nonoptions hitting on men. Lets try this: To a man with no options, a woman with crappy options looks to be MUCH better off than he is. Why? Simple: at least she's getting action that might result in a success. How would there ever be a shot at "success" for a man that is straight to be hit on by other men? That will NEVER end in "success". The woman still has a shot, althoug…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/17 06:38 PM
1

Shorthand: Being misogynist Yet it works so well!
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/17 06:29 PM
2

Yep! and here's the thing: Wife GogglesTM aren't necessarily a "bad" thing, provided a man doesn't let it become full on pedestal hoisting levels. Its OK to let your body 'trick' you into thinking she's more attractive than she actually is IF your goal is to stay happily with her monogamously. I realize my wife is NOT objectively as hot as I see her, and I'm perfectly good with it. In fact? If I wanted to be mercenary about it, that's a very good thing for me, because that means she's LESS likel…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/17 06:13 PM
1

If as a man you've ever heard "you are too much like a brother to me for anything physical", chances are you've been in the friendzone.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/17 04:06 PM
3

But frankly I've not seen much interesting improvements post pregnancies. All I can say is: my ex no doubt got wider hips from childbirth, but she already had a largish rack before. Having a baby balanced her out. My current wife I've only seen in pictures pre-children. She was MUCH less curvy, and in fact probably had a body type just a bit TOO "fit" for me. Again, she already had a rather large chest (which she said was HELL while she was in track. I can only imagine as a "sports bra" doesn't …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/17 01:56 PM
5

stretch marks, sagging breasts, extra skin, a permanent "belly bloat," scarring, all of those are permanent or at least long term consequences of pregnancy. Ya know I have two kids of my own, and my wife has two as well, right? You REALLY think you're filling me in on what pregnancy can do to a woman's body? I mean, I'm not a woman so not the best source, but I can tell you both my ex and my current wife have had children, and in both cases having kids made them more curvy, in the legitimate sen…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/17 01:28 PM
3

Stretch marks are a fact of life for women having kids. If you don't think you can deal, don't get married and have a family. It isn't her fault, blame nature. And I hate to tell you, but time makes everything "sag" eventually. I'm 46, even if my wife never had a child, at 38 she would still be showing signs of age. Guess what? So am I.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/17 01:20 PM
3

I bet sardonis70 hasn't seen lot of women naked. Saggy breast do look good IN CLOTHES because you can make them have the shape you want, but not naked. I get that big boobs sag when naked. Comes with the territory. They still look great rolling around on the bed. Maybe some of you have some seriously unrealistic expectations. Big boobs that defy gravity are fake FYI, and I'd rather be with a small chested girl (and have been) than one with big old saline sacks in her chest. And I specifically sa…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/17 01:17 PM
2

So its not enough to deadbedroom your 40yo "beta", now we are seeing an uptick on them getting beat up? Yeah man! sign me up for that! /s
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 09:02 PM
2

The legal system has problems, but a few very visible problems doesn't mean the whole system is broken. I believe at some point the sheer number of "problems" tends to point to the idea that a new solution is necessary. Maybe we can haggle over the number of problems, but I see a bunch personally, and they all aren't around family court/law.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 09:00 PM
1

OK that does make sense. Still, if nothing else it indicates a pretty large divide among women themselves. I'm not thrilled Trump won so much as I'm relieved Hillary didn't, but I'll be honest: I was shocked as shit at just how many women voted for him. Based on the outrage online about his misogyny, you'd think more women would have voted against him out of spite alone. However, as we see, it did NOT turn out that way. It makes me wonder just how much real support "feminism" has as it exists to…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 08:06 PM
3

and for many women it leaves their bodies permanently changed and less attractive. You mean wider hips and a larger rack? I've seen many women that to me looked HOTTER after they had their first child. To be sure, it can cause a lot of weight issues, but overall, I've never seen a woman that had a child, lost the "baby fat", and looked less attractive to me. If anything, its improved some as I stated above.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 07:38 PM
1

A lot of the women who voted for Trump were probably UMC white women. The women who could easily go to Europe if they need an abortion, for example. Fair enough. However doesn't that kinda indicate that when it comes to "feminism", well off women talk the talk but don't walk the walk?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 07:26 PM
2

What makes you think "kicking women out of the workforce" is my idea of structure and conservatism? Don't think Republican "conservatism", think actually being Conservative. You know, the type of society that THINKS about making changes before they are implemented. The type of society that "thinks" further out than the next 4 years Presidency. A society with a clear direction and a plan to get there. Careful. Thoughtful. Risk aware. I often feel the "left" just wants change for changes sake, and…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 06:58 PM
1

Isn't that a good thing then? That would entirely depend on what you "end goal" for society at large is. If your idea of a proper society is highly structured and conservative? Not so much.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 06:29 PM
1

And this is why I generally like your interpretation of RP, because you and your wife seem pretty awesome together. All the pill BS aside, I love what we have and want to make it last for as long as possible, of course the goal being until one of us kicks the bucket. Thing is, history shows that my "natural inclinations" on some specific issues sucks, and as such fixing it requires some real thought and effort. But again, I love what we have, and want to keep it. Of course, it gets VERY interest…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 06:13 PM
3

This is how the majority of hookups happen now old man I'm going to say this: watching my kids interact with opposite sex peers was and continues to be an eye opener for me. My boys at 17 and 18 seem to understand more about mating and dating than I did at 30, and there's little doubt that their interactions often have a sexual undertone that would NEVER have flown when I was their age. Truly, I didn't feel I could show ANY sexuality as a young man, because I was so ashamed of "evil male pigs" t…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 05:56 PM
1

But I have learned when to bite my tongue - which I'm sure my SO greatly appreciates! You know what truly rocks about our marriage? I do NOT have to "bite my tongue" with my wife, because she understands me enough to know I'm not purposely being an asshole? That being said, I certainly put effort into NOT being a rude brute to her, partly because I care about her, and partly because its good practice for me in general. Further? my wife has told me many times over that one of the things she loves…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 05:34 PM
2

I guess when I say "actively pursue" talking about the woman being the aggressor. Sure, but there are varying degrees of "pursuit" so to speak. So for instance, my wife initiated our first kiss, but I got REALLY close to make it "easy" for her. She was also the first to escalate the initial physical stuff, so making out and "petting". (such a silly word but fitting I suppose) So up until we agreed to our arrangment, I pushed us onward, but stopped just short of the goal here and there to let her…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 05:23 PM
1

Personally, everyone thinks I'm incredibly nice, even if I'm calling them an idiot to their face. I've just learned how to do so politely. ROFLMAO! I'm learning, and I'll admit my wife is a wonderful example of exactly how to get that done. I've watched her run someone up and down with a smile on her face, and despite that rundown, those folks usually walk away from the interaction LIKING HER MORE than they did before. She's a social beast, and I have mad respect for her abilities on that front.…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 05:06 PM
8

It makes me feel un...not unwanted but desperate. That depends largely on just how much I'd "force" you to chase me, and I'm not that cruel. Honestly? I just like to see enough interest from her to push her a little out of her comfort zone. If she's into me enough to be a little bold, I know I've got a woman that REALLY wants to get with me. Plus? Not gonna lie, it kinda sets the "you follow my lead" tone of the relationship right from the gate. If you aren't interested in that type of setup, it…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 04:53 PM
1

So how can you be so good at your work and in the same time need to be reminded of a stupid acronym like AWALT, or even more believe in it? That's easy! I learned my "job" later in life. I was believing "women were wonderful" for as long as I remember. I had to UNlearn what I thought I knew before I could actually learn the truth. And frankly, old habits die VERY hard. How can you master reaching an understanding with your stakeholders and respecting their point of views and at the same time put…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 04:50 PM
1

There's a bit of blunt honesty that seems common, which isn't necessarily so pleasant for other people. This. I wonder if female INTJs are a bit "softer" on this front with people they don't know. Meaning, even though they are INTJ (robots), they are also women with a bit more social awareness? It took my a LOT of years to realize most folks don't appreciate blunt honesty, even when they ask for honesty.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 04:49 PM
1

He's looking at ship repair to start. I have no clue, but my guess is rig work requires a bit of experience up front. I'll be honest, up to know he's been running with the research. The way I see it, right now getting into school is the primary focus. Once there, he will have more resources available to help him make smart choices, so for now I'm not putting TOO much stock on his Alaska plans. Time will tell. Mostly I'm happy he's solidly choosing a trade, and one that he's not only interested i…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 04:30 PM
12

Men tend to feel like they have something over you when you pursue first and I don't like that. I like to have the advantage. I love your honesty! But, you have to admit you can easily see why I as a man would view a situation where a woman was "so into me" that she chases a bit ideal, right? It really does tend to set the "tone" of the relationship, and since I'm RP and all about C/Fm, I'm sure you can figure out why I personally look for very strong indications of early interest, of course inc…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 04:22 PM
2

I've met plenty of female INTJs online, but I suppose that's no surprise at all. The male INTJs I know I mostly met through work, which I suppose is ALSO not a surprise being as I'm in IT. All I know is, for a supposedly "rare" MBTI type, we seem to congregate and/or just find each other randomly. Maybe I only "recognize my own kind" if they are male? :P
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 04:17 PM
4

He didn't, but he certainly got a lot of female votes in general for a misogynist, don't you think?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 03:24 PM
1

;-) Yeah pretty good. I hope my kids do better than I did, so can't set the bar too low. Better yet? He is seriously considering moving to Anchorage Alaska, because they need underwater welders badly, and he doesn't mind the cold. The way I see it? I'll have an excuse to visit Alaska, and he's likely to have a fairly comfortable lifestyle, outside of trying not to freeze solid. That part is still up in the air, but he's already toured a couple tech schools and I believe intends to apply to one o…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 03:09 PM
1

Manufacturing? No I'd agree with you there. But any trade that requires specialized skills AND a presence on the ground? Solid path in my estimation. My son intends to learn welding, and then certify as an underwater welder. Specialized skill, requires a body to be on location, fairly good pay as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 02:06 PM
2

I wonder if this is the right line or work for you. You know what's sad? I am EXCEEDINGLY efficient at managing other people's shit. When it comes to my own issues? Blind spots everywhere. Not so much these days I hope. Fear not. I just had my yearly employee review and I got an "exceeds expectations" as my overall score. You have to remember, as an introverted youth, I didn't socialize much, and when I did never really understood the "value" of doing it anyway. So I didn't "deal" with many peop…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 01:49 PM
1

If it's any comfort, INTJs are my kryptonite. It's infuriating. ROFL we can be infuriating just by being in a room some days. Either you guys like a challenge, or you're completely unable to see all the subtle barriers people put up to avoid looking easy. Or both, which is even more infuriating, because then I need to explain that I'm actually trying to be a challenge, and that's how every single chase started. Both? LOL! For my part, I start out oblivious and then once I realize the chase is af…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 01:24 PM
3

The kind of person that spent over half their life believing women were "better" than us lowly, sinful men.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 01:12 PM
3

My wife is a solid ENFJ. They seems to be my weakness. I really want to meet a female INTJ in real life dammit. I know far too many men than I should for our supposed rarity, but other than online the closet I've met is a female ENTJ married to my ENFJ buddy. (I know a LOT of INTJ men and ENFJ people). She is cool people, but no way in hell I'd hitch myself to her. She's smart as a whip but far too impulsive. And she talks. A lot. Lol. AWALT is a guideline, and a reminder. I think BPers often gi…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 06:32 AM
2

Not true. From certain perspectives, what you call "oppression" is considered good guardianship. In addition, I do not consider a traditional relationship to be oppressive. My wife, as an adult with agency, has said she wants to be happy with me. I'm of the belief a C/Fm marriage is what will make her happy with me, and it appears to be the case. So, perhaps what you call "oppression" she calls "being a good husband". Or, ya know, some people with agency are comfortable and content giving some o…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 05:39 AM
2

Women don't settle for their beta bux, they just look through the lens of RMV rather than SMV. The beta bux SMV might be low but they might have a lot of traits that make their RMV really high. Problem is RMV doesn't get you the sex life SMV does. I'm all about relationships, but not at the expense of a healthy sex life. So while I appreciate a woman correctly identifying my RMV traits, I'm not very interested if I don't "make the cut" without them.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 04:33 AM
1

What would you like me to address? It's a risk to be sure. The sex early on in the relationship kinda sets the "high water" mark in my limited experience. If it isn't hot and heavy early, it's not likely to get better.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 04:00 AM
1

Probably true. If you find one, it'll be post divorce from the first hubby.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 03:57 AM
2

N is one of many factors for sure. I say here all the time: it's not just the N, it's also how she got it. Sounds snarky, but the point is context DOES matter to a point. For me, in my age bracket, that point is somewhere between 10-15 N. Again, depending on a lot of context in that buffer zone of 5.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 01:32 AM
1

From the US. Western PA. 22 for first born seems fairly common among my peers. Which is to say yes, most were having kids not long after high school. As I said, many/most of us didn't go to college, or did so later in life as older adults. Guys got jobs. Girlfriends got pregnant and became wives. Life happened.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 01:24 AM
7

10 by when? 35-40 years old? Sure. By 25 years old? No thanks. When looking for a LTR mate, I prefer one that has always done the same. And I'd expect those relationships to last at least 2ish+ years. (Otherwise it's not LongTerm in my estimation). So ideally she'd be increasing her N by only one every 2-4 years, assuming by late 20's she's getting married, that's easily an N of less than 10.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 12:49 AM
2

It's a smart move. You can't really offshore work that requires hands and feet on the ground.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/17 12:28 AM
1

treat that gun like its loaded. Preaching to the choir with me. But perhaps some of the parishioners are paying attention?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 09:06 PM
1

No doubt about that! But my point is: its hard enough to figure that out when folks aren't trying to hide things. It only gets worse when dealing with someone that has a vested interest in selling lemons.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 09:05 PM
2

Well back in the day, one led directly to the next so... But fair enough, I do see your point on that front. Doesn't change the fact that a woman willing to lie about BC is willing to lie about other things as well. Personally? I prefer not to stick my willy in anyone I'm not willing to raise a child with. Full stop.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 08:55 PM
2

I'm not OP but... Bring back "fault" based divorce and rake him over the coals in court.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 08:40 PM
2

you didn't do your due diligence. Or weren't given the appropriate information to properly DO that "due diligence". I agree its all about "buyer beware", but at the same time if the market becomes THIS embattled, I don't think many people will find it appealing. And, if indeed you are of the opinion that it is ALWAYS "buyer beware", then you must agree that a woman's history, including sexual, is pertinent to that decision and should be fully discussed. Yes?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 08:37 PM
1

Not many that I know of, even from Utah. However, I can't just order a "carfax" to see a woman's maintenance history. I don't think many men expect a virgin, but at the same time they don't want to buy a lemon. Its getting difficult to tell the difference up front, and I've seen plenty of women here suggesting that type of information isn't "owed" to the man looking to invest.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 08:19 PM
1

Nope. Just a simple statement.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 07:59 PM
1

yeah my parents were outliers... they just wanted to wait until they were established first. easy pregnancies too. Honest truth: of the people I know, most always "wanted" to have kids when asked. Most did NOT however actually plan when that would happen, and instead found themselves expecting and making due. Mostly someone got pregnant along the way, and with that came the rest. Call it what you will, but it is what it is. Of course the flip side is: if you have kids when you are young and poor…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 07:43 PM
1

Or the "hood"?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 07:40 PM
1

I almost agree with atlas that men who read are gay lol. If I didn't read profusely as a young kid, I don't know what I'd have done with myself other than tinker with musical instruments. I actually miss having the time to read a book for pleasure, but it is what it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 07:39 PM
1

I think its a mentality shared by many women in the MC for sure, and certainly at UMC levels. Blue collar woman getting a degree from a community college? Not so much. She may very well LOVE to be married to an independent contractor that does roof work.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 07:19 PM
2

right, but this is my point: low value people overestimate their value. our college educated woman isn't necessarily bringing much to the table herself (and was picked over by the guys she went to school with) yet sees herself as above marrying a plumber. Because we as a society put FAR TOO MUCH EMPHASIS on "getting a degree" instead of just teaching our children how to make a decent living. So now that we have more 'college educated" women, they're wondering where all the equal "college educate…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 07:17 PM
1

Regardless if being a hoe is PROMOTED, not all women or even most are going to become hoes. That largely depends on your local environment, which is to say that globally I agree with you, but certain areas of the world tend to be predominantly occupied by certain "subsets" of people.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 07:04 PM
1

We know one couple that just had their first child, and they are both early 40's. They struggled like mad to get pregnant, and then had a VERY difficult pregnancy all around. And? The doctor told her the chances of having another without further complication is unlikely. The rest of us kinda started popping out kids in our 20's, MOST were married first, but a few married after the pregnancy, and at least one married after the first birth. One couple never got married but have been living that li…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 06:47 PM
3

except maybe the libertarians When it comes to personal privacy/freedom, I tend to align with the Libertarian view. Where I lean conservative (that is Republican) is on the economy. Unfortunately, the Rep party likes to talk a big game, but they stumble on implementation over and over again. Ideally I'd like a country that is fairly libertarian on personal rights, and fairly Republican (as they CLAIM to be, not as they are) when it comes to the economy and the military. Of course, there's a LOT …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 06:40 PM
8

From my PoV my gripe with liberalism is simply this: they seem to pick and choose when "freedom" is ideal or "regulation" is needed based on THEIR OWN OPINION of an ideal outcome. Some of us consider an equally UNFAIR solution to be ideal if a solution cannot be present that is equally FAIR to everyone. And, when it comes to the SMP, I'm in the camp that thinks equally unfair may be the best route for a stable society. I may not even like the solution, but if I am as affected by it as everyone e…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 06:32 PM
1

By pushing women to "embrace their sexuality", or put another was Sex Positive Feminism is convincing women to ride the CC, thus leaving fewer women that never have. If there are NO women left that haven't sampled the CC, men are left with a choice between former CC riders and no one to marry and have a family with. So, in short, they are being "pushed" into marrying former CC riders.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 06:28 PM
4

Having a baby with a guy fresh out of university seems like a massive risk. Most of my peer group didn't attend "university" until much later in life. I myself didn't get a degree until my mid 30's when I found an employer willing to pay the bill for it. Most of us graduated HS, got jobs, got married, and started having kids in our 20's. I should also add we are all from the working class and "done good" by those standards, at least to our families, which probably plays a large part of that. The…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 06:17 PM
3

My oldest is 23, and I'm 46 years old. Most of my kids peers have parents around my age, and most of the people I know with kids started having them by the mid 20's, with a few exceptions that either never had children, or waited much longer to start. I'm a little ahead of the curve in my peer group with my oldest, but my son is 17 and most of my friends children are right there with me, meaning most of them have late teens/early 20-somethings as well. We are ALL still in our 40's, but my oldest…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 05:32 PM
3

My interest in radio started in middle school with a CB. :P However, as I got older I came to realize that its just about the best last plan for long distance communications if shit ever truly hits the fan, and I've kept my license active mostly just for that reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 05:23 PM
3

Just did a quick Google search: https://www.nasa.gov/mission_pages/sunearth/spaceweather/index.html Lots of info there about solar storms, and some info about how they can affect the power grid and even above ground pipelines. A lot of the info is online, but much of it is hosted by pages that look to be a bit on the tin foil side of the fence. However, that does NOT mean the info is incorrect. I've seen folks talking about things as crazy as Google launching a DoS attack against themselves and …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 05:19 PM
1

Glad I read your response before I posted. This exactly.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 05:11 PM
1

Well if all dealerships let their sales people drive the "new" cars into the ground and THEN try to sell them for new, there's a problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 03:59 PM
5

You are most welcome! I'm not wearing a tin foil hat over here, but you'd be surprised at how many of the things we take for granted technologically hang by VERY thin threads. A cascading failure in some specific systems would literally end the Age of Technology, and even though I'm in IT, I can't help but be concerned at how reliant the West has become on tech that can fail at key points quickly. What do we do the day self driving cars can't drive because their connection to the "cloud" is down…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 03:38 PM
7

Yes. The Modern Western world is in a "safety bubble", which is to say so many of our basic needs are met by default, we have the luxury of basing decisions on more frivolousness desires.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 03:28 PM
3

One very strong solar flair that hits the earth and drops the power grid would send us back to the stone age in a moment. Everyone thinks the power can just be 'turned back on', but if enough of the grid drops at once, it cannot simply be 'jump started' to get things back up. It could be months, or even YEARS before we'd be able to repair the damage. That's just once scenario of many that can cause exactly the type of catastrophe you described.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/17 03:25 PM
5

Putting this here because I obviously can't read... I don't choose my kids hobbies nor social life. When it comes to my boys (and I have a son and a step-son under my roof) I tend to concentrate on trying to show them how to be a solid man more than a "hot" one. That is NOT to say I downplay the looks part of the equation, but more that I don't suggest my boys do ANYTHING specifically to get laid, and instead I suggest they do things to be better people, because sexual success often comes with g…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/17 03:22 PM
1

DOH moving now :(
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/17 03:22 PM
–

I don't choose my kids hobbies nor social life. When it comes to my boys (and I have a son and a step-son under my roof) I tend to concentrate on trying to show them how to be a solid man more than a "hot" one. That is NOT to say I downplay the looks part of the equation, but more that I don't suggest my boys do ANYTHING specifically to get laid, and instead I suggest they do things to be better people, because sexual success often comes with general success in life. In addition? My wife and I d…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/17 02:42 PM
1

But it's not my impression that most red-pillers want a LTR. Well in the light I see your point! I can't say because it's possible the LTR minded ones simply aren't as vocal, so to speak. Also consider age, as I'm far older than the average TRPer, which changes the end goal for some men. Meaning many probably decide to "settle down" later in life. Many probably never do. I've always been LTR oriented so have no real insight on that path.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/17 10:58 PM
2

You're way over thinking it I suspect. I'm actually all about living a quiet, comfortable life with my wife. Thing is, it's not good for things to get TOO comfortable and stay that way too long. To be sure, having kids takes care of that in some ways, but the kids won't always be around. So it's good to know how and when to keep things interesting without causing real discomfort. I'm not suggesting men go all in and become a thug to keep things spicy. And "bad boy" means different things to diff…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/17 10:44 PM
1

That'll get guys attention, but if they haven't gotten their head straight? All that attention will go to waste. Source: had tattoos and did drugs, still got DB'ed eventually. LOL (to be fair, "drugs" consisted mostly of weed. I'm not a fan of anything harder. And my usage was during the early days of playing in bar bands. I quit all that "childish" stuff when I got married. And the rest is history as they say.)
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/17 09:06 PM
1

I've often wondered the same thing, although I wouldn't say my life is "exciting" so much as I simply have a lot of interests that take up my time leaving little to devote to the "idiot box". (the name my grandparents had for TV when I was a child.)
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/17 09:02 PM
2

when the uncle starts talking about how the democratic party is going to lead to the apocalypse, it's better to sit that one out. Have you been to my family dinners? :P
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/17 08:59 PM
4

And frankly, I don't think RPers are interested in being that guy. Actually its a fairly good tactic for an RP man that wants a LTR that'll last. Trick is to find your inner "bad boy" traits while not actually turning into a criminal, and then let her spend the rest of her life trying to "tame" it out of you. Of course, never let her succeed or the game is over.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/17 08:53 PM
3

This sounds like the "sexy sons" hypothesis, only instead of using "looks" as the determining factor of "sexy", we're looking at manipulation ability. It probably stands to reason that for some men, this indeed works if the goal is to simply sire offspring. Not sure it actually helps the species evolve, but I can't say it hasn't either.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/17 06:37 PM
4

I learned pretty quickly where I was on the social totem pole when I was a freshman make no mistake, I knew I was near the bottom of the totem pole in HS. Ya know what my family said? "rough it out, high school ends and with it all the BS." LOL, not so much. I mean sure, the "clique" thing kinda went away, but to your point: and what did and don't get me attention from the "cool kids." I avoided the "cool kids" for much of my time in HS, because I was under the impression they'd lead me down a "…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/17 05:25 PM
8

Of course! The kids in HS were just that: kids. Why would I think they knew anything more than the adults in my life?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/17 05:09 PM
4

But I don't understand why. Where do they get that image of women from? For me? The Catholic Church and my family of which the women seemed to hold the Virgin Mary in high regard.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/17 04:56 PM
3

who's shaming David Beckham for caring about his appearance? Just about every single man I know. LOL. I assume most of it is sour grapes, but honestly I can't say for sure. EDIT: by single men I mean every man I know, NOT only the "single" ones. :P
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/17 04:53 PM
5

Seeing women as perfect infallible beings is just as sexist. actually I see that as being MORE sexist than having a little bit of old fashioned "misogyny" sprinkled in.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/17 04:44 PM
7

I question it because we all went to high school, where the social hierarchy is pretty brutally upfront about what is popular/attractive/cool. So unless someone's been homeschooled, they've likely been exposed to this. I was "exposed" to all sorts of things by high school. Didn't change the message I was getting at home that said ALL of it was wrong headed. I distinctly remember when NWA first hit the scene. I loved it because it was so raw and aggressive. But the life they talked about? Might a…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/17 04:41 PM
1

Yep!
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/17 04:47 PM
1

2 parts "asshole", 1 part "teddy bear", mix thoroughly and serve. :-p
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/17 04:39 PM
3

Good shit brother. Extra kudos for turning a DB around. Mine went divorce, but round two is going much better. We'll see if I learned. ;-)
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/17 04:39 AM
3

It's really not too shabby.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/17 04:12 AM
4

That's why women like "hot guys who don't know it". It makes them feel secure and like they won the lottery, because when the man is better than the woman by a lot it puts her on the defensive and in conserve mode. Ya know what I prefer? Being a man that knows his worth, with a woman that knows I know,'and of course being well past her threshold. So plenty hot enough. Who is secure and aware, but not defensive. She's secure because he... tells her "I love you" every single day. In fact, we excha…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/17 03:15 AM
3

The real bitch here? It means nature put men and women at odds to improve them. Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/17 03:21 PM
1

Just sayin. I don't know a single man that dumped his wife for a younger woman. Probably like you don't know any women that "divorce raped" their hubby.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/17 03:18 PM
6

Struggle is good for species fitness. Competition usually breeds success, in this case literally. Edit: some female spiders eat their mate once pregnant. You'd think male spiders would stop breeding, but instead they evolve to get away faster. Hence faster spiders. Basic example but you get the point.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/17 04:05 AM
1

It seems in many cases this is exactly how it plays out. And in some cases despite his issues she'll stay. I suspect of the latter some stay out of love, some out of guilt, and some because he still offers her something she values. I'm not suggesting I only offer a paycheck, I'm saying starting the relationship with the attitude that you have a backup plan (can support yourself, don't need no man types in particular) is a non-starter for me. we will not have separate bank accounts. We will not h…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/17 03:58 AM
3

I'm still waiting for the day Google becomes self aware and enslaves humanity. If there is ever going to be a SkyNet, it's Google AI. And Google knows my weaknesses in my search history. :-( All kidding aside, I'm not totally against cybernetic enhancements to the human body. I draw the line somewhere around the point the "body" becomes unnecessary. Like I'd be on the fence with getting a port installed in my head to directly connect to a digital world, because I can still choose to pull the plu…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/17 10:19 PM
4

I'm actually a fan of humanity retaining its animal nature as a species. Removing it would also remove the drive that brought us this far out of the ooze of early earth. However, I'd like to see us make strides to strengthen our ability to fit our animal nature INTO a positive framework for society, rather than continually force people to fight it. In short: I do not ever want to be uploaded to some digital realm so my "being" can survive outside my body. My body is VERY MUCH part of my being. I…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/17 09:01 PM
2

I'm white, I've been randomly stopped This happens when you're in the hood , it's not a race thing DING DING DING! It's been awhile for me, because I'm old and don't look to be up to no good, but in my 20's I often got pulled over with excuses like "it looked like your inspection was past date. Here's your paperwork, have a nice day" at least once every few weeks. They'd come up with some lame reason why I got pulled over, but it was clear they were checking me out. (ran my license/plates hoping…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/17 08:50 PM
3

transhumanist That one word explains a lot to me on your position. Even as an IT guy, I'm not a fan of the concept at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/17 08:36 PM
3

For a woman, a man is not a plan. That amount of faith in me would SURELY get me to commit. /s If I'm not my wife's main plan, she isn't going to remain my wife. In fact to me that is the primary purpose of getting married. If she's not making me her "plan" why the hell should I risk divorce for her down the road? If she wants a ring, she has to go ALL in with me. If I'm risking it all, I expect the same from her.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/17 07:30 AM
1

It's almost cute you came to that conclusion. It makes no difference what women say they want. Who they have sex with proves much more about them than anything any woman says about herself and her ideal man. Talk is cheap, the real money is where the action is. Which is why it's important to get a feel for the kind of men in a woman's past. I don't care about what she thinks she wants, I want to see what her actions say about that.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/17 07:19 AM
1

I've never had casual sex either and from my male POV I'm still looking for those levels of sexual attraction, in a long-term partner, not a fling. Why? Because for me to be able to last long term I'm going to need a robust sex life. So while i understand that from your POV "good traits" are key, from mine strong physical attraction and a highish labido are key. I'll bring my faithful if you bring your vixen!
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/17 06:51 AM
1

Who is "they"? I suspect ideally most men want a woman that behaves like a slut for him and an ice queen to all other men. Or maybe that's just me? :-p
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/17 06:40 AM
6

The absolute LAST person on earth I want to "challenge" me as you described would be my wife. I challenge myself just fine, I need someone to support those efforts. Our marriage is not a competition, nor am I my wife's fixer upper project. I'm more than happy to hear her constructive critisism, but that "challenging" crap wont fly with me. It falls into the "pushing my buttons" category of behavior, and I don't like having my buttons pushed. Certainly not by those closest to me that should know …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/17 06:17 AM
1

Oh yeah, that was my goal all along. Chase my first wife off being a wuss so I could "trade up". Plain truth: I got a "younger/hotter" model because I could. Why the hell wouldn't I? My first wife bailed, and I found myself getting attention from younger women. Am I supposed to turn that down for some reason I'm unaware of? As a kindness to my older ex?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/17 04:34 AM
2

There's a sushi buffet downtown that rocks, but again I don't need to give seals a solid run on how much fish I can consume in one sitting. I can mess up some raw fish. My wife likes rolls but I gross her out eating sashimi. The rice just takes up too much room in my belly, so straight fish is more efficient. (And by efficient I mean fat kid cause I can nom more fish) $13 dollar buffet is exactly what I'm thinking when I say cheap Chinese. Pretty sure that's what the one at our mall charges. It'…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/17 02:50 AM
1

I'll say the impression I got was a proper man didn't concern himself with what was "sexy", he concerned himself with being the kind of man women wanted to marry. I was never once told what was "sexually attractive" but I was told a "good woman" wanted a proper plow horse. So in a way, I'd say I believed husbandly meant sexually attractive. At least to people that weren't "broken". Meaning all those kids having casual sex in HS? Yeah, I looked down on them as bad people, because I was told they …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/17 01:30 AM
3

I think the problem is the most prolific posters and commenters are also probably the most "hard core" about it. Moderates don't get much attention if/when they post. And honestly? Moderates don't really motivate men to get off their asses, so it's probably a feature, not a bug.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/17 01:26 AM
2

Two best hangover foods: Chinese buffet or extra greasy breakfast! Sadly, excessive drinking is right up there with over eating so... you see why I get so hung up on sex? It's something I enjoy that isn't unhealthy for me! Everything I like seems to be bad for my health. If sex ever becomes bad for my health? I'm gonna die sooner than later. I can live without Chinese easily enough. Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/17 01:23 AM
1

It took me 8 years to wrap up my first two relationships. Each lasted about 4 years. So I was 26 on GF #3, that became wife #1. We don't all go through women at the same pace I guess?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/17 01:13 AM
1

Atlas. FFS we weren't allowed to think about any of it in sexual terms. The Church was in the business of making good plow horses out of young men. In other words: to me sexually attractive and "husbandly" were the same damn traits. If i was husbandly women were supposed to want me. Certainly "good", "mature" women, not the kind that have sex in cars. They're immature and don't know what they want in a man. Who the fuck talked about what was sexually attractive? That leads straight to sinning an…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/17 01:07 AM
2

you gotta be the god damn Jesus Christ of Chads. That would be an awesome flair! Jesus Christ of Chads. Catchy!
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/17 12:31 AM
2

Just a few anonymous surveys. But we all know elephant men lie and inflate their N anyway. And the selection bias wth that group is through the roof!
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/17 12:25 AM
3

Matt gets laid like tile!
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 11:31 PM
3

Does the Elephant man have solid game? looks don't matter to women. I saw it on the internet, and the internet doesn't lie.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 11:30 PM
1

Which leaves an all out arms race to the bottom. I don't disagree with you, but that's the issue as I see it. At this point, what is good for the individual is NOT necessarily good for society, and I don't see that conflict going away anytime soon.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 11:25 PM
3

Truth is I avoid buffets. I put too much effort into losing tub to start shoveling food by the plateful. Besides, now that my stomach is smaller, I don't feel like I get my money's worth. When I want Chinese or whatever food, I prefer to just go where I order to eat. Resist temptation and usually get better quality that way. But yeah, I love me low end Chinese buffet. It's just so horrible for you lol. And now I'm craving it... Thanks for that HAHA.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 11:20 PM
1

If we can't create an environment that is fairly equal for everyone, I find equally UNfair a viable alternative. It isn't like marriage 1.0 was a glorious deal for average men, and I'd say both men and women "suffered" under that model equally but in different ways. What we have now isn't equal or fair, and as I said if that can't be accomplished I'd say the old model worked well enough. Of course that is from a high level perspective. I'd prefer to be happy and fulfilled in my personal life, bu…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 11:00 PM
2

So honest question OP: do YOU believe RP men buy it all hook, line, and sinker? I'm sure some do, but my guess is it won't help them anymore than any other self help advice they'd likely apply incorrectly. Just because some men treat RP like some kind of cult does not mean ALL red leaning men do.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 10:54 PM
3

Salad bar?! What are you vegan? It's a buffet, and mine has a LOT of meat. Salad is what my food eats to become food.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 10:50 PM
1

I have no intention of going pro, but I have no issue with making it legal, safe, and a new tax revenue. I'm just pointing out that your solutions isn't one, unless the man in question lives in Nevada.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 10:45 PM
1

I still dig it from time to time, probably because it's the closest thing I'll ever have to casual sex. It's purely about the sex drive minus all the extra crap I have to deal with being oddly wired. It does NOT however do anything to help my desire for real sex, so the utility is limited for me to novelty at best. Mostly? I enjoy a bottle of wine with the wife and a little porn to pre-game the wine sex. And for us "wine sex" is a separate category entirely. ;-) To your point? I get it. When I'v…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 10:42 PM
2

Not legal in most areas of the USA. So your solution makes men into criminals.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 10:33 PM
3

I need to like a woman's personality to actually want to have sex with her, but I have no issue just getting "turned on" watching porn. It's kinda messed up actually, because it means I can rub one out to a hot woman on a screen but drop her in front of me and chances are I'll be completely turned off whenever she opens her mouth. And from then on she'll just be a turn off to me completely, screen or in person. I've been told here and elsewhere I seem to be Demi based on my descriptions. Don't k…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 10:24 PM
1

the standard is: commitment = exclusive, unless otherwise outlined.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 09:19 PM
3

It is often a very delicate balance in my limited experience. I don't necessarily hold that MRP is indeed Red Pill on "hard mode", but things like this do tend to point that way. I tend to believe both are difficult for different reasons.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 09:19 PM
1

That's because it varies from person to person and couple to couple. There are people that have open marriages and probably consider them "committed", but that wouldn't fly with me for example.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 08:15 PM
16

Do you think that its possible to cherry pick Every RP man I've had one on one conversations with have done exactly this. To be fair, they are all older men, 30+ years old. They use it buffet style: take what you want, leave the rest for others.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 08:02 PM
1

Maybe? I'd say such men have little to no desire to be bound by someone else's rules perhaps. You'd have to ask one directly, because I'm not avoiding commitment myself.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 07:52 PM
1

An agreement between two people on the "rules" of their relationship? I can't commit to an agreement that hasn't been outlined yet, or at least I'd be a fool to do so.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 06:36 PM
2

I had a d'uh moment and almost changed it to V8 (I'm married to a car nut, I should know better) but I was like nah... he won't notice. ROFL..... I've been a Dodge fan since childhood, and just recently got a Dodge RAM 1500. I replaced a sedan with it, and I couldn't be happier. The problem is that the guy selling the luxury sedan hears that she wants a comfortable ride and thinks "maybe I can convince her that my sedan is what she really wants" when in reality she's still looking for a pickup. …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 06:14 PM
8

Women aren't "wet" over faithfulness or fatherly traits, they are secure when guys who make them wet have those things. SO MUCH THIS! However, I suspect in most cases, the man in question still wants a sex life of a man that "gets her wet", and in many cases what promotes "wetness" goes completely against what provides relationship comfort. And we wonder why men are confused...
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 05:58 PM
3

I'm sorry but I can't resist. Hemi is a Dodge motor. :P I get what your saying, but many times "women" don't seem to be clear about wanting a pickup versus a sedan, and in fact they often seem to want pickup options packaged in a fuel efficient sedan, and it doesn't work that way. They describe all the "nice features" of a sedan, and then take a truck anyway AND COMPLAIN the truck isn't as comfortable.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 05:34 PM
17

you can't use category a to make up for your total lack of category b. DING DING DING! Problem is, many men have been led to believe that is EXACTLY how it works, especially when they hear women say "looks don't matter that much". I can honestly say that was my impression for many, many years at least. In reality, looks "matter" in terms of a man even getting his foot in the door, but when asked women seem to forget that step of the process.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 04:20 PM
1

I think the newly unplugged man is a LONG WAY from knowing nearly enough to weigh perspectives. That's the point of it being called an "anger phase" you have to get past it before you can begin any kind of introspection and self reflection. In other words: if they're still angry, they aren't "thinking freely" at all because they aren't ready for it. But my point was, anger got me off my ass and moving, and once some signs of improvement appeared, the motivation slowly drifted towards positive ou…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 03:33 AM
2

As I've said before: I've always known men were capable of awful shit. I need a reminder that women are just as capable, hence AWALT works perfectly. It's also a baseline to compare individual behavior against, as in "how much better than AWALT is this particular woman?" Why do so many women assume Red guys think men are angels? We suck in our own ways to be sure, we mostly don't see a point in discussing it.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 03:18 AM
2

Actually I find that when I'm angry, I get very mentally focused. Anger is one of the few emotions that completely pulls me "into the moment" and makes me hyper aware. I am at my coldest and most calculated when I'm really pissed off. I do not blind rage, I simmer and smolder. And anger WAS my motivation for taking the first steps to improvement. Along the way that faded, but "anger phase" is a perfect description of it. Maybe some subset of men can turn anger into energy instead of victim puke.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/17 02:47 AM
4

Yes, this. So much RP rhetoric I see reminds me of college. Not all of it, but a lot of it. It is the only context in which certain RP analyses ring true to me. Look also at poorer communities. Blue collar towns, section 8 housing, rural south, etc. Basically anywhere outside of the Liberal Coasts and/or anywhere predominantly "office workers" and UMC types live have a higher chance of seeing the worst of AWALT in action. So, ya know, that fat area in the center of the US everyone here seems to …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/17 06:23 PM
5

Mostly I like discussing my views with people that disagree. It'll either solidify my PoV, or it'll force me to look closer and make necessary adjustments.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/17 03:26 PM
1

I am for 4 romps a week, and we usually manage that without too much issue. Sometimes we can even get a few "twofers" in on the weekends!
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/17 01:31 PM
2

I don't know about being a baller, but sex once a week doesn't cut it.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/17 02:51 AM
1

No shit lol. I told my boys dropping a load freely is like leaving a blank signed check on her nightstand. Condoms are cheap, baby's are anything but.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/17 05:29 PM
2

I like being able to look a woman in the eyes, and tell her I have an almost flawless clean slate This exactly. And? in return I'm looking for the same from a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 08:36 PM
3

Dude I know a guy who was cheating on his wife while she was in labor. Fucking hell. Some days I really hate humans.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 08:21 PM
1

I suspected as much since porn certainly doesn't do much to get rid of the desire for a mate in general... It'll maybe take the edge off for awhile, but that's about as good as it gets for me. As much as it sucks, maybe some men just need to realize monogamy isn't for them and NEVER agree to it. I'm not exactly sure how such men can get some of the other things they'd want related to relationships, but I'd think there are at least some women that might be good with an open arrangement or somethi…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 08:11 PM
3

And yes, every woman I've had sex with that I could have accidentally gotten pregnant is somebody who I would have been willing to have a child with (although thank goodness I didn't with one of them). Stop right there. If that is truly your take on this, then we are 100% in agreement. So honestly, in this regard we have nothing to debate. My point is that I shouldn't be subsidizing people's lack of faith in their sexual partner, and I shouldn't be forced to take a DNA test just for choosing to …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 08:05 PM
1

sigh That would explain the fact that the women he cheated with were BY FAR lesser "quality" than his wife. I'm not gonna lie, I kinda assumed it was because he was cheating, and as such had to choose from the pool of women "OK" with that, but now I'm wondering if it was really just opportunity + reached limits. I distinctly remember the last round, the woman he cheated with was so obviously "not good" and I asked him point blank: "Why? If you're going to risk everything, why with her?" All he c…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 07:57 PM
1

Good! Nothing wrong with that. I can tell you with full assurance I have at least one in my past, and other than that I have no real clue. I don't suspect my other LTR mates cheated, but since they are former LTR mates at this point its irrelevant anyway. My only concern on that front is my current wife, and I wont have the definitive answer until one of us dies, if ever. Or of course if I actually find out she cheated and divorce her. But more to the point? I had to get to a place with her that…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 07:45 PM
1

If that's truly what its like? I feel for them. And I'll add, I have one buddy that had indeed suffered with this problem in his past, and your brief description aligns really well with what he described to me. I'd have to ask him point blank what he's done about it, but to the best of my knowledge he's remained 100% faithful, but he's also on marriage # 3 so I certainly hope he's figured it out.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 07:40 PM
5

Maybe I misunderstood. If you are saying men have the ability to not get random women pregnant? Yeah I'm on board. BC is a real thing. But in terms of marrying a woman that'll cheat on you 5 years from now? Good luck figuring that out with a serious investigation. And even then? Its still at best an educated guess in many situations.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 07:38 PM
6

I'd agree with you if such women had it stamped on their foreheads, but since all a man can do is guess, I'm not so hard line on that front. If you assume everyone in the SMP is an honest agent, I'd agree with you fully. However, I have no faith at all that most people are fully honest, and I suspect many are far less than that.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 07:29 PM
1

The devil is in the details. For example. IF we should ever hit a real impasse, I'm supposed to make the choice. Now in practice? This gives me wife a LOT of incentive to work with me on a compromise, and gives me a LOT of incentive for the same, because I don't want to be "the asshole", and she doesn't want to have her desires stepped on. But, technically, if she and I both stick to how its laid out, in such a situation I WOULD be the asshole and she WOULD have her desires stepped on. THAT is w…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 07:26 PM
1

I may or may not have an advantage on the "variety" front based on my wiring, so as much as I get your point, I can't really speak to it. I know plenty of men that seem to struggle on that front, but I know several that don't as well, and because of my own inclinations the only thing I can do is say I think I understand the problem, but I've never suffered it and can't really speak to it. Not a cop out, just a confession that I'm not in the position to speak on the subject personally.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 07:22 PM
1

LOL so change "what's best for the kids" to "what's best for the marriage" and you're about 75% through our C/Fm setup.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 07:17 PM
12

YEP! It should be part and parcel of a newborns general "health assessment", and they are already done now. Just one more test to the batch. Hell, give parents the option to NOT get the results and there should be no one to complain.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 07:15 PM
8

So? We already pay for PLENTY of things with our taxes I'm not on board with. The "fair" thing to do is accommodate everyone, or at least make every effort to do so, with how our tax dollars are spent.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 07:14 PM
3

I agree 100%. Have fun selling that to the masses.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 07:12 PM
1

I know there are plenty of guys who do not view sex as super important, but everyone on this sub seems to think sex is the meaning of life. HEHE, you may be new here. Make no mistake, I find sex to be VERY important, inside the confines of a committed relationship. I'm still a man, with the same general sexual desires, I'm just not wired to express that through anything casual. If anything that's one key area I'm VERY MUCH standard RP. Sex is about the top of my list when it comes to "what is im…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 07:12 PM
1

I'm gonna get accused of "mansplaining" HAHAHA To get an attitude of "what have YOU done for me lately", you have to FIRST believe your SO is there to "serve" you in some capacity. Its a blatant statement of entitlement. Our C/Fm setup means that my wife does NOT "do things" for me, she does things for our marriage. If she has to "do something" she isn't pleased with, it is NOT my fault nor am I to be the target of her ire over it. She is more than welcome to talk to be about the task and why sh…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 07:07 PM
1

It sucks but this is the world you live in buddy. LOL preaching to the choir! I'm making my own little slice of heaven in hell, and in truth I'd say that's the best most folks (men and women) can hope for. But again, I sincerely hope your wrong that I'm so rare. Truth be told, when it comes right down to it? I hope my daughters find and marry a man just like me. To be sure they won't necessarily make their lives "easier", but if they support him and commit to the relationship, they will never fi…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 06:58 PM
3

At first read all I can say is I was mentally nodding my head in agreement. There is a lot to unpack here, so I can't add anything deeper now, but I'll say that I'm at least on board with your general line of thinking here, and again at first blush I'd say it aligns fairly well with my own PoV on relationship dynamics.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 06:54 PM
1

OH gotcha. Listen I fully agree. However, you and I both know its far more common than not, certainly within certain subsets of relationships/marriages. As dumb as it sounds, for me RP removes that, because it clearly outlines that "what you do" isn't for me, its for our marriage. Same for what I do for my wife. Now that does NOT mean I still can't do "nice" stuff for her as a woman outside of the fact that she's my wife. So everything I do for her doesn't fall into the "Captains duty", some of …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 06:32 PM
1

What if those were her only two options? Ditch both and live alone? Short answer? yes As much as I'm all about "men's options" here at PPD, don't think for one moment I believe women should just roll over and take what they can get. My advice to an individual woman with HER OWN SITUATION would very likely get me in hot water with my Red compatriots, because I don't play for "team man" in those cases. So to my daughters, I basically told them to go for what they want, and IF they ever decide to "…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 06:26 PM
1

Which words?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 06:11 PM
1

So you'd advise your daughter to choose the cheater instead? Are you REALLY asking me this question? You know the answer, so ask my what you really want to know.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 06:10 PM
1

I have one friend in particular who is trying to get straight and narrow despite having a drug-addled, kinky past... his new girlfriend is very sweet and a bit sheltered, I suspect she'd balk at his history but my lips are sealed. I would NOT say a thing to his new SO, but I'll tell you point blank I WOULD give him shit for not filling her in if he was indeed my friend and shared this with me. I'm not interested in "ratting people out" or anything, I just don't want to associate with dishonest o…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 06:09 PM
3

I think you have to stop seeing everything through the lenses of someone who had a sexless mariage. I think as someone that has lived through one, saying such is minimizing the impact it had on me, and my mental well being. I'm not suggesting everyone in the world should use my particular PoV, I'm telling you how my PoV aligns with RP in a way. You want to know why RP resonates with me? Here is your answer: I have through most of my life lacked "raw appeal" to women, but have never really suffer…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 04:52 PM
2

Me? I don't read the TRP sub, and have stated such many times over. My reasons for that are various, but I'll tell you I was RP well before the sub even existed. To me, the TRP sub is just a tiny piece of the whole puzzle, so I don't get nearly as bent out of shape by it as others here seem to.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 04:35 PM
7

How is that a terrible situation? It may not be. But in my mind, its a "bad situation" because a lack of raw attraction is an indicator of possible trouble down the road. I've lived in a deadbedroom marriage, and as such I've determined that even though I want a solid relationship, I don't want it so much that I'd trade a healthy sex life for it. If I have to choose, I'd take healthy sex life hands down, because without it the "relationship" is useless to me. To be sure, I want both, but again t…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 04:33 PM
2

That just seems so odd to me. I can't say that I know the exact N count of my friends, but I am confident in saying I can easily tell you within a small margin of error. How? Because over the years we've talked about past relationships, past ONS, past everything. I know my buddies checkered past during his first two marriages. I know about the "coke whore" he tried to LTR up after his first marriage and before his second. I probably don't know about a few women he may have had sex with prior, be…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 04:22 PM
4

They are happy. Good for them. Sincerely. I'll simply state that I would not be content having that knowledge going into a marriage. If other men are good with it? Cool. My bigger concern is how many men go into a marriage having NO CLUE that is exactly the situation he's facing?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 04:14 PM
2

TRUMP SAID HE WOULD DRAIN THE SWAMP! He will fix it! /s
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 04:12 PM
2

Well I'm having sex with a woman through all this so... But as to your assessment of my situation? If you don't like it, don't copy it. I'm getting the sex I want, the relationships I want, and on my terms, so despite what you think of it, I'm good. But to your point? I've been told I'm trying to have my "blue pill fantasy" in a Red Pill world. COOL! My goal is to prove it can be done, and if I fail? So be it. I'd rather die trying to get what I want than to live my life pissed off I never tried…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 04:11 PM
4

Can't CYV because I agree with it, although I'll admit I haven't put much thought into why, because I don't have a high N and as such it doesn't concern me in the least. But I'd certainly advise a good risk assessment to anyone looking for LTR/marriage in general. I leave it to individuals to determine what constitutes a good risk assessment for themselves, and I'd completely understand why a woman would pass on a high N man.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 04:07 PM
2

In practice you have high n-count men marrying very valuable women in very well thought conditions. Most likely the most valuable women these men ever reached. So, there are external reasons to resist the urge and handle the angst this causes. In other words: lack of abundance and/ or "thirst", but its a very valid point for most men surely. And you have high n-count women invariably marrying men that are far from the "best" they had in a handful of aspects, leaving them with no external reason …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 04:03 PM
2

so she gets a divorce and looks for a lover who is less good looking and less likely to stray. And pray tell how do YOU think that man should feel about her decision? Should he be happy he's the "safe bet" but not the most attractive?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 04:00 PM
3

A cop out? LOL. Real truth, it would take me pages to get it all in writing. I honestly can't describe to you the fundamental PoV shift that came with RP for me. Its difficult at this point for me to tease out whats "RP" about me now and what's just me, but of course that was the goal all along. To internalize the new PoV, and then just live it. I've considered trying to lay it out in a way that might make sense for others, but I wasn't being coy when I said its still a work in progress. I DO NO…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 02:24 PM
2

I don't know what to say other than I've read the same stuff, visited the same blogs, and debated the exact same material with other RP men myself, and here I am. The sidebar over there isn't something new or groundbreaking, its much of the stuff that's been around since the beginning of RP. So, if I can read it and be a "reasonable RPer", what's stopping other men from doing the same? (NOT that I'm suggesting men should follow my lead here.) The fact that it appears many/more men just get angry…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 02:12 PM
6

But if you think men dominating women in a relationship is going to catch on, it won't, not anymore than it already exists. Because most women don't want it and aren't attracted by it. I think your perception of "men dominating women" is the root of the problem on your perspective. I may be the Captain in my marriage, but that in no way represents DOMINATION in a dictionary sense. Like, at all. In fact, to be honest, the fact that we have an established hierarcy means not only do I not DOMINATE …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 02:04 PM
4

But it's true when I say that's what trp is built upon - hate. I simply can't say that fully. Certainly the hate is thick, but "based on hate"? No, if anything, I'd say RP is based on pain. In particular, the emotional pain of men that struggle to DEAL with their emotions more often than not. They're angry and want to roll in hate like pigs in mud. That strikes me as an individual issue and NOT a 'sphere issue. If a man wants to wallow in anger, he's going to do so no matter what his belief syst…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 01:52 PM
3

The red pill sets young men up to think that manhood rests upon a bag of tricks. And if that bag of tricks is exposed, their manhood will shrivel like a popped balloon. I"m gonna be blunt with you: I'd love to see RP go "mainstream" because I'd like to see how this plays out myself. YOu know I have no love for most of the "tricks" as you called them, but I still found plenty of valuable info and perspective. I'd actually LOVE to see a version stripped of PUA scripts and one-liners, and in fact i…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 01:47 PM
4

If you'd landed at r/fitness instead and learned how to lift and get fit nothing would have changed because my initial motivation for improving myself post divorce was... ANGER. If I'd have gone to a fitness sub, I wouldn't have done a damn thing with the info. I was depressed, and the last thing I intended to be getting into was exercise and diet. However instead I landed in the 'sphere, and it bunched up my panties so tight I had to start exercising just to "exercise those demons" so to speak.…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/17 01:27 PM
2

Kids are either messy, or they are a pain point because you have to pester them so they are NOT messy. :P Ours are older, so we go the latter route. They do their own laundry, take turns doing chores, and cook at least one meal for the family a month each. Our kids will NOT leave our house claiming they don't know how to properly "adult", so if they turn into slobs that's all on them. Adults? When they were younger, our kids were with their other parents all summer. We used to clean the house to…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 08:17 PM
2

Shit, I spent a solid year as a single dad. I'm not gonna say it was easy, but I still managed to go out and meet my current wife, and my kids didn't suffer for it one bit. Me? I was burning both ends of the candle, but that candle lit a fire under my ass that's still burning, so no complaints here.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 07:59 PM
2

Since we've opened this rabbit hole anyway... Shortest was 5'4", tallest was 5'9", and my current wife is 5'8". Far as I can tell, other than super short I don't have much of a preference on height, but I have a clear preference for shape. So as long as she's still got the curves, and she isn't carnival sized, I'll probably still find her attractive. However, what I HAVE learned is there are many distinct advantages to being with a taller woman, but you do lose the ability to toss her around at …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 07:50 PM
1

I'm just really surprised to find that the concept of "high maintenance men" isn't more about them simply having high expectations. When I say I'm "difficult", I'm just being honest about how bullheaded and stubborn I can be, and while I do try to curb those tendencies I'd be a fool to think they don't affect how "difficult" I am. At any rate, being an introvert goes a long way towards helping this, because I'm happy my wife spends time with her friends without me on occasion, because I really d…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 07:37 PM
2

No doubt about it, I agree 100%. But, I'd also like to point out that a C/Fm marriage does NOT necessarily mean SAHM is required. And sure, it means life is more "chaotic", but I'll be blunt: its no less chaotic for me than it is my wife, the chaos we individually deal with just happens to be different on occasion. Additionally, don't assume that C/Fm means I don't do shit around the house either. I work from home full time, so I'd be an absolute asshole if I wasn't contributing a bit on home ma…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 07:16 PM
3

Is this legit? I take back my previous statement. By this metric, I'm about as low maintenance as a guy can come. If anything my wife would complain I show too much affection. In fact, I'm coming to terms with the fact that when it comes to physical affection, I may very well be "the bitch" in our marriage. :P
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 07:12 PM
5

YOU GO GRRL!
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 07:06 PM
3

I'm more than aware that "most women" would NOT be happy with me, rest assured. Here is something to consider though, and I think Nomdplume covered it in his comment: sometimes a woman will meet a man that will get her questioning if her "life goals" are really worth it. I've known women that swore they would NEVER have children, but 3 years after meeting "the one", the first baby arrives. Of course I'm not suggesting every woman alive that claims to want an "egalitarian" marriage is in denial. …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 06:56 PM
6

That is why in my opinion the Red Pill is wrong in saying all women want an 'alpha', because by the way they describe an alpha, it seems to be the kind of man who demands a lot, and many women just do not think he's worth sacrificing her hobbies and career for. Quality people tend to expect and often demand quality from those they associate with. Exactly what any individual considers "quality" varies of course, but I'm not at all surprised that a "man in demand" (that is rather attractive to wom…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 06:42 PM
1

No cops around here brother. They WILL show up with numbers. A few years back, I had to confront a group of about 12 male teens outside my front door looking to come kick my stepsons ass. (and I shit you not, when I walked out to see what they wanted they TOLD me that.) My wife of course called the cops, while I stood there and ran down all the nasty shit that was about to go down if they didn't start walking. Long story short, a 15 year old kid got tazed by the cops and taken to jail WITH HIS M…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 06:30 PM
3

TOUCHE! No malice intended of course. I'm a big built Polish dude. Yeah, I could use to drop 30lbs right now, but even at my best I was around 215lbs with a 37 inch waste. I'm 5'11" and wide. The shortest woman I've ever been in a relationship with was 5'4", and she said she loved being out with me because I made her feel small. HAHAHA (full disclosure: she was still a curvy woman, because that's how I roll.)
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 06:25 PM
1

I just can't unsee that I barely know any two women with the same taste in men. That's fair. But I can't unsee the fact that overall, most of my friends and peers are with women that seem to find similar traits attractive either. No my social group isn't a monolith of exactly similar people (in fact quiet the contrary actually!) I can easily find the common denominators among those men to get an idea of what positive male traits are perhaps more "universally" appealing to women, by REMOVING the …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 06:18 PM
3

92 pounds?! I'd be worried I'd break her... :P
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 06:05 PM
1

Well, the thing is, that depends on a lot of variables. Around here, where fights are often youths competing for position on the "bad ass" totem pole, its NEVER just about eliminating the threat. In many cases its about showing an overabundance of aggression, so much so that NO ONE would dare fuck with you again. As a result, its common for very minor altercations to explode around here that results in kids in the hospital. Which is precisely why I tell my kids to focus on eliminating the threat…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 05:53 PM
2

I had a RIDICULOUS "hair routine" when I had hair down to my ass. I have great appreciation for women with long flowing locks that look well cared for. That shit ain't easy!
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 05:41 PM
2

I gotta say, A+ effort with all the pics added! I got a real kick out of your Metal photos. Brings me back to the good old days. HAHA
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 05:40 PM
8

more often than not I find "Adele" sized women more attractive than petite/small/thinner women. I've jokingly said in the past I'm attracted to the kind of body on a woman that indicates she'd survive a week without food if shit goes bad. Too many thinner women look to me like they may expire if they miss 2 meals in a row. Also, to put this in perspective, my wife gets hit on far more often by random black men than any other subset of men, including us white boys. So, its fairly clear that I'm a…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 05:23 PM
1

I'm going to answer this twice: my personal perspective and what I've told my children. Personally, I still live by the "never hit a woman" mantra, but that is a personal choice. However I will NOT say that I'd go too far out of my way to minimize the "hurt" I'd inflict on a woman trying to kick my ass, but I'd still at least try to do so. I've told my boys pretty much this: "If a woman squares up to you and throws a punch, my suggestion is do what you can to control the situation WITHOUT resort…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 04:42 PM
3

I dunno: are the angry TRPers today the same group as the angry TRPers 6 months ago? I think not, but rather there are always a whack of new guys who legitimately get angry about how bitches treat them. . .but they get over it. Yep this is my take as well, although I've admitted I have no way to prove it. Hell, I'd wager the vast majority of men that read TRP don't post at all, so we'd never know they were there to begin with.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 03:57 PM
3

The conversation was amusing. She made mention that "I noticed you don't wear a seatbelt." I replied about how I'm an adult and if I want to become a projectile it's my right. She calmly said "what about your kids?" And I said I have life insurance blah blah. Her reply "do you really believe your value to your kids can be covered by a six figure check?" I sat there for a second, realizing I'd just been checkmated AND she was right, and then I reached over and grabbed the belt. We haven't talked …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 05:36 AM
1

No one is "immune" to emotional bias. Some of us simply put a lot of effort into trying to reduce it, while others seem to be unaware of the fact that how they feel is NOT necessarily reality. I don't hate people for following their feels, but it often makes them less reliable, less committed, and as I said less useful. When whatever stops being "fun" or "exciting" no longer is, you can only count on them to leave. Entertaining to interact with in small doses, but I would not in any way tie myse…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 05:30 AM
1

A lot of people are just looking for a good mix of their neurochemical cocktail, and that series of motivations can become a lot more complex, very quickly. AKA "feels over realz" I have little use for people in my life that chase emotional highs. It's fun to indulge them from time to time in safe ways, but it's a piss poor way to run a life IMO.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 05:11 AM
1

Red Pill tears are the only thing that sustains me. Do they taste better if their face is still stoic? Stoic tears. Someone needs to use that for a band name.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 04:53 AM
1

Ok not gonna lie, the link to my old comment and ensuing thread cracked me up!
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/17 03:14 AM
1

The 10 Commandments are fairly narrow and distinct too. Yet there are how many entirely different faiths based on it essentially? A half dozen under the banner of Christianity alone? And how many versions of the Christian bible are there with various sections added and removed? Maybe I'm just an Old Testement believer and my version doesn't match The TRP official. What of it?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 11:15 PM
1

Above a certain age absolutely true! I don't have a good feel for how the demographics play out for the younger RP guys though. I get the impression its a rather mixed bag.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 08:19 PM
2

ROFL its not about reason, its about waking them up. Outside of all this sex stuff, when I'm talking to other men about anything they struggle with, the language tends to get crass. "Stop being a fucking pussy!" is exactly the kind of thing I'd say to a good buddy crying over spilled milk. Its not because I'm a misogynist, its to shake his shit and make him take stock in himself. Of course, this works because he knows if I say that, I'm being blunt about how he appears to me in that moment, NOT …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 08:12 PM
1

Shock and awe is not only effective in warfare.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 07:44 PM
7

I think you are pretty on point here. It isn't only social interaction of course, I tend to view the entirety of existence as one big "plan" being put into motion constantly being jostled by opposing needs of individuals. Which is probably also why I refuse to use a machine or gadget I can't understand at a mechanical and functional level. I'm not satisfied with knowing that pushing "start" makes the washer go, I want to know HOW it does that. No, I don't break out schematics for everything I ow…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 07:18 PM
2

Of course Women have the human (female) programmed, but it is a tool that ensured survival. I agree, but I didn't come to that perspective until after I found RP. It was RP in fact that forced me to recognize it. Hence a red flair.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 07:02 PM
4

She was the only girl on the HS wrestling team. She was the oldest of four, and the only girl in the family, so she spent her entire youth wrestling with brothers. She also played softball. And, when she lived with her ex in NH, they had a 40 acre farm where in addition to "day jobs" they raised cows and pigs. For all intent and purpose, my wife is a New England Redneck, which is something I didn't know existed until I met her. Going to her home town was funny, because it reminded me an awful lo…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 06:37 PM
3

Don't go blowing sunshine up my ass. I'm older, maybe a little wiser, but I don't know about smarter. I'm sure there's a ton of raw horsepower in the sphere, certainly if its rank and file are STEM types. But I fully admit I've never been a TRP sub member, and don't intend to become one. Not even because I think its wrong, immoral, or misogynist. There simply isn't anything there for me. Or, more to the point, I don't have anything of value to contribute given the general atmosphere, and I'm wel…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 06:23 PM
2

the majority of men are just insulting women, even their own wives ("insufferable bitch") with a few genuine compliments thrown into the mix. You misunderstand: I appreciate that my wife is capable of being a bitch (I believe I used the term Stone Cold Bitch in my post). I don't want a push-over for a wife. I want her to be fully capable of standing her ground. However, I am not nor ever will be her "enemy", and any of that behavior directed at me will be met with a very quick shut down. This is…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 06:10 PM
4

However, if men see no opportunity to succeed, then they get more aggressive and ultimately try to bring down the whole system. This would maybe partly explain the ideas and language seen on TRP and incel communities. Some people would rather watch the world burn than adjust within it to succeed. Actually, those are the folks most likely to strike the match that starts the burning.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 05:53 PM
4

I just posted to the top level. ;-) Gotta represent!
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 05:41 PM
7

My wife is an amazing person. She is by far a much better "human" than I am, because she genuinely likes to help people, even people she doesn't know. (hence a medical career) She's smart. Based on IQ, she has me beat by a few points, so its clear she's no slouch on mental horsepower. She can and does easily apply that horsepower to get shit done, and I absolutely admire her tenacity. When she sets her mind to doing a thing, it gets done efficiently and effectively. She can and will "lead" when …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 05:36 PM
1

Did it work as intended? :P
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 05:11 PM
2

I've said it, but I think I add that from my PoV they are not Red Pilled, but like I said above, my PoV is no more accurate than any other RP man here, or anywhere else. I think what you're really seeing are RP "Protestants" and RP "Methodists" arguing over the intricacies of the RP Bible. I don't imagine that will end in consensus.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 05:09 PM
1

It is not a bad thing to be considerate to some degree, and it will not make you look weak if you do so. Some women seem to have a wide "margin of error" on this while others are on a hair trigger. I've known women that see "consideration" as a weakness, and I think in a general sense its a larger problem than dating. The West tends to paint kindness and compassion as "weakness" when coming from a man that does not ALSO hold strength in equal capacity. I'm not talking about big muscles here, I'm…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 05:04 PM
3

What club? I'm not being coy here, I'm genuinely asking. There is no club I'm aware of. Just a bunch of men that share similar PoVs and beliefs on some core things about mating and dating. Do you see much resemblance between my use of RP and a PUA based on my input here? Do you think me spending time with those guys would do either of us any good? No, and that's a clear example of why I find "RP: the club" such an alien concept. And even if there WAS a club, who would be in charge to dictate who…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 04:51 PM
2

We have enough problems keeping Incels/MGTOW/RP/Trolls straight and you want to add in more factions?! You're right though, RP is large enough at this stage that its "core principles" are now like the 10 Commandments at the base of MANY different beliefs surrounding them. Personally I have zero desire to figure out who is who, because I'm mostly only in this for myself anyway. Call it selfish, but I'm not trying to save the world, and every RP man on the planet isn't part of my "tribe", so unles…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 04:36 PM
3

It's quite possible that the same guy sincerely believes that he'll be the same romantic jackass for the entirety of their presumed relationship Ya know what? I can't deny that. It makes sense when I consider just how much of a sappy sack of "romance" I was as a young man. I just had this idea that once the "courting" part was over, the business of raising a family took over and all that nonsense went away with it. At any rate, the motivation to do all that stuff isn't usually just "I want to ge…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 04:26 PM
3

Known in the American Football world as armchair quarterbacks! I don't poke at men like this much because I'm no model of RP in action to follow, but I apply what I like from it to good ends in my personal life. I should be working harder, and for that I shut the hell up about other men's less than stellar efforts. But honestly, I think the vast majority of men posting in the sphere may NEVER even try what little I've done, and I can only say if that's the case, they'll never be ANYTHING other t…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 04:10 PM
5

How many years did many of these guys live without "getting it" before they found RP? Does it surprise you that after finding RP they still struggle to "get it"? I'm not surprised at all. And in fact, a lot of the mental conflict that occurs early on will get men backsliding an AWFUL lot. I mean, I was making positive changes in my life WHILE BITCHING ABOUT IT ONLINE until I finally realized I'd improved, and I had nothing left to bitch about. And even if I did? It wasn't the bitching that fixed…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 04:04 PM
4

In terms of it happening before a relationship, I just find that utterly bizarre. You are missing that man's motivation: he probably believes if he does enough for her, is nice enough to her, and serves her well enough she'll "fall for him" and they will live happily ever after. I'm sure he isn't thinking about the fact that if it actually works, she'll expect him to "serve" her like that for their entire relationship. He's probably thinking that once they settle into a relationship he can go ba…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 03:25 PM
2

So in those cases the women in question were fairly confident of your status perhaps? Or, you weren't in an environment were women expect more "alpha"? Honestly most women I've ever interacted with didn't "shit test" me much. However, most women aren't looking at me as a prospect, and I don't present myself as one to all women daily. The women I LTRed up made it "easy" for me as well, because they'd already decided before we got very far that my status was sound, mostly by virtue of how we were …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 02:35 PM
2

My issue was always attracting women in the first place With respect, this may be the root of your PoV. I've never really had a difficult time generating interest from women short term, but increasingly found it difficult to keep them around. Now, that is NOT to say I had women throwing themselves at me in any way, but the truth is if/when I went looking for a new relationship, I found women interested enough to take a peak. However in most cases that interest went "cold" fairly quick, and of th…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 01:42 PM
8

Sure, its RP theory they toss around. I can go to a Christian Sub and talk about Catholicism all day long but that doesn't make me a practicing Catholic.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 01:25 PM
4

There is not much of a problem with women having sex with a string of men and then settling down with what is rudely called a "beta bux" That largely depends on how nice the woman is that ends up holding that beta's leash. Some people are very good to their pets, some not so much.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 01:20 PM
1

Yep fully aware. Nothing new under the sun, but I'm getting damn tired of it being broadcast 24x7. Especially since it means most of my peers and contemporaries seem to consider it quality entertainment. I'm not looking to stop immorality. That's futile and would be no fun at all. I wouldn't mind a bit of lip service towards the respectable side though. Frankly the US being the cesspool of human entertainment is getting old. I don't blame the world for thinking we suck when our most popular medi…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/17 05:56 AM
2

Difference is: a man doesn't choose to be short. Most women choose the N they have. Its the choice I question, not just the outcome of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 06:44 PM
1

Not IT necessarily, but it largely depends on exactly what my employer does that dictates their drug policy. Currently we do not in fact do random testing. However its not completely unheard of for someone to be assigned to a client that requires a more comprehensive screening to meet their requirements, and it would at least be a VERY awkward conversation to have with HR about why I can't be assigned to that particular client. Legally, I'm not even sure what my employer would do in that situati…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 05:13 PM
3

that's why you see leased BMW's parked outside decrepit ranches on the wrong side of the tracks all the time. I shit you not, just one block away from me sits a shiny Hummer with chrome rims next to a house that appears to be rotting away in a car port with a leaning roof. The Hummer is no doubt worth MORE than the property its parked on. No doubt in my mind at all. In fact, I kinda hope they live in the Hummer.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 05:03 PM
1

I may be wrong, but I think they already have... Won't change things for me unless I change careers though unfortunately. :( Oh well, there's always retirement to look forward to!
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 04:49 PM
1

How many women do I meet? In terms of looking for mates? Very few, because I only look for a mate when I don't have one. As to how long it takes to figure things out? Depends largely on how much time we spend together early on. If its often, probably a few weeks to a month max. If we only see each other once every few weeks? Hell that could take months. Mostly, once I choose, I just spend as much time as possible with her (within scheduling reason) to figure it out sooner than later. With my cur…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 04:47 PM
1

HAHA! It goes out to about 10 years, but right now we're sitting on the fence about where we intend to land once we can move. Somewhere out West where its warmer, but I'm not willing to go all the way to the coast. We have a few ideas, but decided not to actually make the call until we are closer to go time. Funny thing is, a few of our married friends are about in the same position and are ALSO wanting to move away from the rust belt, so we may just end up somewhere new with a small support gro…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 04:21 PM
1

I've made my choice and I'm good with it. Doesn't change the fact that my impression of the West is one of moral decay and decline. Again, I have a stake in society and as such I'm voicing my concerns. But mostly, I only do that here anyway since it IS the topic of conversation. I don't think "the decline" can be stopped, but I won't be sitting pool side enjoying the show. I'm "angry" about it because now my children have to deal with it head on, not because of how it affects me directly at this…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 04:15 PM
2

Totally depends on where you live. I've said here before, the house we currently live in was purchased as a foreclosure for 26k cash. We had to sink another 4k in to fix a few things (like all the missing copper pipe in the basement) but we own it free and clear. And, we are currently raising three kids (since my oldest moved out) on just over a combined GROSS income of six figures a year. In my first marriage, we managed for about 5 years on my single income of around 56k a year. It was the lat…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 04:10 PM
1

Depends on exactly what a guy does in IT. My wife is plenty happy to tell folks I work in management doing "something with computers", and her co-workers are more than happy to accept that explanation. A few asked me for more detail, but I shut that down quickly by saying I get paid to worry about things so other people don't have to. A few of the doctors actually started pinging me for "tech advice", which has also added to her "status" in being paired off with me. Find a way to make your skill…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 03:59 PM
1

True love is what makes people stick to each other in good times and bad. I'm actually of the opinion that choosing to stay is what makes people stick together, and the result of doing so and making it through adversity together is what builds "true love" as you put it. I don't put much value in love as an emotion. However, love as action is priceless. The emotion feels great, but has very little actual utility.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 03:39 PM
1

Because I'm stubborn, bull-headed, and Polish? And in truth, my POV today IS the changed one. I used to be MUCH more "hard line" about this stuff in the past. Also, I tend to want what I want how I want it. (like most folks). Some things I will compromise on, others I will not. Who I'm legally and emotionally tying myself to is something important enough to NOT compromise on. In fact? If anything I've become FAR more picky post RP on it. I'd rather go without than to settle for something sub-par…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 03:11 PM
2

Good point. ONLY having six ONS would certainly be a red flag for any woman in my age bracket HAHA! I'm just putting a little context to it, because lately I've seen some crazy low N's tossed around as "bad". Of course the age matters, and to your point any woman in her 30's + is easily going to be around the 6 mark. At that age, like I said, double digits would get me to look further, and probably anything past 15 is just a no thanks. I haven't had to make that call yet, and I hope to never hav…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 03:06 PM
1

The metaphor just struck me as odd. Plus I was battling another round of insomnia last night so not necessarily in my best state of mind. :P And still, why shouldn't I try to change the world to better fit my imperatives? Isn't that pretty much what everyone does? I actually don't expect the world to "cave to my demands", but reaching for the stars might at least land me on the moon, and that's still in space! Lastly, I'm not looking for "the world" to want my skill set, just a large enough subs…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 03:00 PM
1

Logically I get it. I can objectively look at "sex" as a biological function and understand the "why" of it, right up until I bring it to the personal level and then all bets are off. I've mostly accepted that I will never understand it, and as such will probably never fully "get over" it as well. As much as I can and do work on the logical side of my POV, there often isn't much to be done about the emotional side of the equation except to work around it. And I'm simply a judgmental person by na…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 02:57 PM
3

Again, you can be very secure in yourself, but still dislike it when your SO fawns over all the hot opposite sex people around and/or finally get fed up with them fairly obviously trying to make you feel some type of way. At minimum I'd say "fawning" behavior is rude and crass. Additionally, I'd add perhaps a bit lacking in empathy. Nothing wrong with discussing the hot guy/gal that walked by for a quick minute, but if every girl/guy that walks by is "hot", there's a bigger problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 02:45 PM
1

I'd prefer the woman that had sex within the confines of committed relationships over a woman that didn't in general. Yes, I realize that there is "more sex" within LTRs, but I'm not of the mind that the vagina can be worn out by use, and since I'm interested in LTRs myself, I'd at least see it as her having past experience learning to adapt and adjust to one lover over the course of time. IN addition? Hopefully she gained useful LTR experience outside the bedroom as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 02:27 PM
1

I completely agree with you, but would also note that an N of six isn't even unreasonable in my POV. In a general sense I'd probably start being concerned around the 10 mark, depending on her age and as you put it, the context. More to the point? The less drunken ONS and FWB in that total, the better overall. In fact, honestly, more than a single drunken ONS where she "learned her lesson" would trip my alarm bells, but again considering my age bracket, context would be key. (2 of them 15 years a…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 02:24 PM
2

casual sex is no big deal and says nothing more about a person's character than that they like to fuck. And that is a fine opinion. Frankly I tend to judge people's morality largely on how they behave sexually, although not necessarily in the "traditional" sense, as well as how they treat others in a more general sense. Someone that likes to fuck without much thought or care for it past the "fun" doesn't have a moral framework I'm at all interested in pairing off with. So to me it speaks volumes…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 02:15 PM
2

Most of the negative traits that terps thing n-count is indicative of can be observed much more accurately and directly just by observing a person's behaviour. That process takes time though, and a woman past a certain threshold of promiscuity would be a waste of mine, and I'd be wasting hers as well. So it makes sense to use a broad brush for the first round in my mind. If I can quickly figure out that she's probably closer to my comfort zone, the more likely I am to investigate further.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 02:10 PM
2

It's a bad metric because it doesn't mean anything. It's a proxy for other traits, and it's a really unreliable proxy. As a first level filter its a great proxy. I'm not of the mind that I'm required to give every woman a chance to prove herself as an individual before I disqualify her, and an N past my comfort zone is just that: too high. Now that being said, for most women I agree with you, N is only the vague sense of what she's really about, so once I have an idea that her N isn't too outrag…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 02:06 PM
1

I was raised by a single mother, although we had a LOT of support from my grandparents. I don't hold that single mothers are the plague of the earth, but I do maintain that single parent households are FAR from ideal for raising children. And in truth, I'd prefer the older method of living near extended family so there are even MORE people to lend a hand. However the modern West isn't conducive to that type of environment except in very poor locals. (and then its simply the fact that no one can …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 01:59 PM
2

But when RP says "beta bux" they're not necessarily implying gold diggers, just women who want a comfortable life where they can raise their kids, not worry about money and be married to a man that's high status in their particular community. A lower six-figure salary is enough to accomplish that. Not only that, but if she's working min wage jobs and/or "stays home" after the children start coming, she knows she'll have a piece of that for years to come whether she's still with him or not. No, I…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 01:56 PM
1

I also don't see how a more conservative sexual system would necessarily lead to more "stability" nor do I think that two parent homes are necessarily better. Then we probably don't share much common ground to discuss.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 01:23 PM
1

For starters: less out of wedlock births. Less spread of disease. More stability. More economic production because of increased stability. More/longer lasting marriages which also means more children from two parent homes. (Even MORE stability!)
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 08:32 AM
3

Actually I ignored the seatbelt law for awhile. Early in dating my wife pointed out that although I was an adult and could make my own choice on it, I'm worth more to my children alive and functional. Sometimes adulting just sucks. Especially when it involves being responsible for others. Wearing it still bothers me.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 07:30 AM
2

AWALT was part of killing the romantic in me, so I get it. Id rather be a slightly jaded realist than a blissful idealist though, so show me the worst and all that. And I agree on the generalizations. Really that last part was a bit of fun with you, because I noticed a bit back we share similar POVs here and there. Its not so bad giving up on romance. It allowed me to set much more realistic expectations for my relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 07:00 AM
1

The popularity of shows like Jersey Shore makes the point for me. And now shows like Married at First Sight and Seven Year Itch? We've totally given up on even the pretense of having morality. And those two have the added bonus of making a mockery of marriage at the same time! (As if it needed more mocking.)
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 06:53 AM
1

Having casual sex and continuing to work on longterm goals = not mutually exclusive. I'd want one of her long term goals to have been LTRs. A woman that has always wanted and worked towards serious relationships over anything less serious for whatever reasons. I can understand why some women priorities other things, but I've found time for relationships at all phases of my life because it has always been my goal. So putting off getting serious to get that degree is a disqualifier, certainly if i…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 06:49 AM
1

I shouldn't be surprised. I can't imagine what a dual Demi relationship would be like. It might be a bit too fucking intense honestly.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 06:43 AM
1

Fuck buying a sheep if I want a cow. I'll buy nothing in that case. And frankly if I want to be angry about it, who are you to say otherwise? Maybe if I bitch, and other men bitch, the market will get a few damn cows to sell from wherever they're hiding them. Or maybe cows will see men that really want a cow and have been stuck with sheep and free them from their barnyard oppression! And I'm actually not in the market for a sheep or a cow at the moment, thanks.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 06:40 AM
1

Looking at a hot woman is nothing more than viewing a sexual object, so jerking to porn is as impersonal as sex can be for me, and in that case I don't even view the woman on the screen as a person, let alone someone to connect to. And FWIW, I often do wax it to replays of past sexual escapades with my wife, although I really just don't go solo much these days. Porn will get me hard, but I'm really not a fan at all. No man, I find the idea of having sex with someone simply to get off repulsive. …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 06:35 AM
1

Realizing what I am also allowed me to stop caring that my boyfriend has had casual sex in the past - it used to bother me before because I put so much meaning into it, but for him it was nothing, which is the norm for a lot of people. Knowing hasn't changed that at all for me. If anything, its made me even more uncomfortable with it. It puts me at a distinct disadvantage in a sexual market primarily consisting of casual sex/early sex even with relationships. I simply don't function at that spee…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/17 06:19 AM
2

You'll therefore find most BP men "doing" the latter, and by doing I don't mean they are actively doing it, but they inherently understand that they need to be attractive, tend to have an understanding that a relationship may not last forever so it's good to be able to find someone else in the future, and understand that desperation is a turn off, so they avoid behaving like it. It took RP to show me this for whatever reason. So, for all intent and purpose, at least one RP man seems to use the k…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 08:56 PM
2

I'm a romantic who believes that there's too much casual sex in western society. I used to be a "romantic" but RP cured that. As to the rest I'm with you 100%. Should we start a new pill color? TRPers usually enjoy casual sex. Check the flair!
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 08:51 PM
2

I've been told as much here before and elsewhere. While it may be cool to have a name for it, it doesn't change how it plays out in daily life much. Where would one find other Demi's anyway? Is there a dating app for that? :P
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 08:25 PM
1

It's new to you but it ain't new. Its now more than ever not only socially acceptable to live a hedonistic lifestyle, its glamorized and promoted in the West. It may not be new, but public acceptance as at an all time high. THAT is my beef more than the existence of such behavior when it comes right down to it. I was born in 1970, so I've been witness to it for a few years now. I do not consider it "progress" of any sort.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 08:22 PM
3

We went from "the Patriarchy" to "free love" in a few generations. I find that to be rather extreme. There is plenty of ground between those two ends of the spectrum.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 07:55 PM
2

Does you aversion to casual sex apply to men too or just women? Both. I have no more respect for "studs" as I do "sluts" although I fully acknowledge being a "stud" requires more effort/skill/good genetics. Everyone else in the universe is also entitled to their preference too, even if it doesn't align with yours. They absolutely do! Collectively as a society, we'd ideally be working to accommodate as many PoVs as possible. If I never say "I don't like X", there is zero chance X will ever change…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 07:35 PM
12

ROFL! She's too low value for me, because she squandered her "value" with lessor but "exciting" men. I mean, if she's really chomping at the bit to get with me DESPITE all those hot men in her past, who is actually more valuable? If she's willing to lie about her past, she obviously feels like I'm "valuable" enough to deceive. She doesn't deserve my excellent provisioning and Captaining skills, because she doesn't have a work history of being a solid first mate. And brother, I don't have to acce…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 07:25 PM
4

That sounds like a personal judgement based on how it affects you and your preference far more than it does any concern for your kids or society. Am I wrong? That was speaking directly towards the accusation that its insecurity that causes men to "dislike" high N women. It has no bearing whatsoever on WHY I think casual sex or "sluts" is bad though. And no, actually I'm greatly concerned about the possible repercussions for my children, as they choose their own path. Much less so than how any of…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 07:17 PM
6

There are other, better factors that are easier to screen for (is it winter?) like her risk taking behaviour, addictive behavior and morality so why not focus on those instead. Those are often related to N count. Besides, I may not mind that my future wife is a 'risk taker' by mountain climbing, because mountains have zero to do with our relationship. Dick climbing however may impact it directly, or at least I'd say CC riding type risks are more pertinent to a marriage than climbing mountains, y…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 06:29 PM
8

If you're in a happy relationship you're not looking for anything, so who's a slut and who isn't should be irrelevant to you. Then it just becomes pious judgment of strangers so you can feel better about yourself. I don't publicly "slut shame" anyone. My judgment of "slutiness" are a subject of debate here, and as such is relevant to the conversation. More to the point, I have young children just starting their adult lives and I'm VERY concerned at the world they will face. I see the prevalence …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 06:22 PM
9

The short version: sex without a deeper "connection" of some type triggers my "ick" circuit. I can look at a woman, determine that she is PLENTY "hot" enough to desire, but before I get the ambition to ACT on that desire, I'd need to know if I like her, at least a little bit. To me having sex with someone you don't know at all is masturbating with someone else's body. Its very risky, very rash, and not very logical or sensible. In addition, it shows absolutely zero future-time orientation and th…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 06:00 PM
23

For real! Don't they trust their driving?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 05:18 PM
1

In my mind lower marriage rates in the "poor" sections of society WOULD be great if they weren't still having kids like crazy. And, no matter WHAT we do, we will NOT stop poor people from having sex and making babies. Not unless we start putting birth control in our water supply at least.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 05:13 PM
1

If a guy is going to drink himself into oblivion it's better that he live alone than have a family. As depressing as much of these discussions are? This might just take the cake. Mostly? Because its 100% true.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 04:56 PM
36

I highly doubt this will CYV, and I'm sure it'll be called virtue signalling or some BS but here we go: I'm a 46 year old man that has NEVER had sex with a woman who's last name I didn't know. I've never had sex with a woman I didn't care about. I've never had sex with a woman who's family I haven't met. I haven't had a single regrettable sexual encounter. (for sure plenty that weren't great and/or maybe something new that didn't work out, but ALWAYS a positive experience for me regardless). I i…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 04:52 PM
1

Right so in short: if a man or woman already HAS wealth (UMC) then marriage is a great way to consolidate AND grow that wealth. For anyone that is poor from the gate, marriage is likely to make things worse, or at least NOT likely to help much. I like to keep pointing out here at PPD that there are FAR more "poor" people in the world (even the USA) than UMC elites, which is to say its great that the wealthy have stable marriages and all, but that fact in NO WAY helps the vast majority of the pop…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 04:29 PM
1

poly societies were extremely common long after we figured out where babies came from. And they were still largely very "communal". We are NOT, we instead are very much about ownership and accumulation of wealth. You can't accumulate wealth personally if you have to share it with everyone else. Further, I'd wager a guess that tribalism can only work in smaller societies. Even they were concerned with the acquisition of "wealth" from other tribes, but back then the "spoils of war" went to everyon…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 03:53 PM
2

you're also overlooking the fact that many if not most early societies were polygynous, so many women were married to chieftains while most men were denied the privilege entirely. No I'm not, I'm simply glossing over most of human history right up until we figured out where babies came from, because prior to that, most of this was speculation. SURE many early societies were Poly, people like to have sex and no one knew or cared who the "daddy" was because children mostly belonged to the TRIBE. A…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 03:15 PM
2

Do you not see that there is a difference between being a cuck and feeling like one? I do, but does the man in question? He FEELS like a cuck, what would make him think otherwise? Even if the reality is that the woman he's with is 100% faithful, if he feels otherwise that will be his reality of the situation. So the choices there are: "Get over it" AKA figure out how to align how you "feel" to reality. Find another woman who's past/personality/etc doesn't somehow put you off your balance and fee…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 02:48 PM
2

You are looking at one small set of folks from the past though: the rich and royal. Marriages became common with the poor as well, and although it may have still been a way to "consolidate power" (as two families with goats tied by marriage now collectively share more goats and whatnot) and partly to ensure lineage. I agree, when men didn't know they were raising other men's children it didn't matter much. But guess what? Men started to figure it out. Over time humans realized that babies didn't…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 02:36 PM
2

Maybe? I don't think its necessarily experiences though. I mean, you can have a wide variety of sexual experiences with one other person and cover a LOT of ground. Personally for me, the issue with higher N women is that their PoV on sex and sexuality isn't compatible with mine more so than her "experience" and/or my supposed "lack" of it. I do NOT see sex as a fun recreation or a sporting event. I do NOT approach getting laid as a "challenge to be won", and I have never had sex just because it …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 02:25 PM
1

Once men kinda figured out how babies are made, they mostly started controlling women's sexuality. What that tells me is: women in a general sense cannot be trusted to be faithful at a biological level. (conscious choice aside) And because of that, men went to great lengths to control female behavior to ensure paternity. Seems like in that case, a bunch of men not participating in society due to lack of confidence in raising their own legacy WOULD be an issue, and it was, which resulted in a who…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 01:11 PM
1

Easy for someone to say that will never unknowingly raise another woman's child.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/17 12:06 AM
2

Give me Ashley Graham all day, every day. She's my kind of "fat".
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/17 06:05 AM
2

Best sales pitch for Advil I've ever seen in my life. Pretty much my POV exactly.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/17 05:38 AM
2

It's not just the N count, it's how she got it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/17 05:27 AM
4

I'm all about shower sex, certainly during shark week. But food sex? Gonna have to move it to the kitchen because I get very "icked out" by the idea of food in my bed. Its just, gross. I could probably get over it with a few well placed orgasms though HAHA
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 09:04 PM
2

I made it all the way to 38, but truly, that marriage was over years before, and it took that long for one of us to admit it. And yeah, like clockwork from the age of 30 to 35, the married men in my social circle found themselves in divorce court. I don't know a single man that was married in his 20's still with that wife, including myself. ALL of them are, however, remarried.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 09:01 PM
8

but the ones who sound like the whiniest babies are the long term red pillers. Accepting RP has NOTHING to do with how much time a man has spent in the 'sphere. I'm sure there are men that have been around for years that are still choking on it.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 08:54 PM
1

which has happened to an astounding number of couples at this point You are either younger than me, or your social circle is slow on the uptake. For mine, most of that chaos happened about a decade ago, or in other words when my male friends hit about 30 - 35 years old.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 08:50 PM
3

If I don't have sex with a guy, I can maintain intimacy, seemingly indefinitely. From your PoV? sure! You are getting your needs met. But, from his? I highly doubt he feels the same about the situation. OH for sure, he's being VERY attentive and VERY accommodating, because he's still looking for his "payoff" in a way. If you REALLY want a LTR with intimacy, you're going to need to figure out how to get YOUR needs met while meeting his in a continuing fashion. I can't speak for all men, but I can…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 08:46 PM
2

And women will never accept this. The sooner monkey-brained men accept this, the better we'll all be. Individual women accept this every single day. Its called a C/Fm marriage around these parts, and they DO actually exist. Mate, your whole hypothesis fails when you consider that women struggle against being dominate That's assuming that "what women want" is actually good for the species, and I don't assume that is correct at all. Its entirely possible that men in general are "dominant" with the…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 08:37 PM
6

Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining that TRP isn't talking about LTRs, because that isn't the point of TRP. However, that means guys that successfully use TRP for LTRs/marriages aren't really a good fit to contribute. At this stage, I can no longer easily separate "RP Theory" from the "Sardonis guide to RP marriage", and since marriage isn't something TRP is concerned with, I don't feel I have a dog in the fight. And no, I'm not looking to start some Married RP trend. MRP already exists, but…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 08:19 PM
2

But keep in mind that for every 3 or 4 of those losers, there's 1 guy that's actually trying to improve his life, because he sees elements of what he can use as a starting point in his own life, and the things he needs to change seem logical and doable rather than some kind of insurmountable quest to become super mega ultra Chad. And that guy is probably the least likely to be posting about any of it at TRP. Certainly, if he does, it'll be buried under the rest.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 08:14 PM
7

A man's gotta eat! And occasionally shower...
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 08:05 PM
9

Exactly, the people who have used TRP to success are not necessarily altruistic about giving back to the community that helped them. The community isn't always so welcoming to such, unless of course that particular man's PoV aligns perfectly with RP group-think. I'm all for helping a brother out, but I'm not about to subject myself to the backlash I'd be likely to get doing so. The way I figure it, guys that want to follow my lead can find me here. I'd never suggest my way is the right way anyho…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 08:03 PM
2

People are a weird. Yep, and they prove it every single day. I can tell you from my own PoV? Man, I was crushed when I realized just how much of my first marriage's implosion was my fault. I'd spent the last 13 years truly believing I'd done "everything right" and still failed, only to find I'd missed an entire part of the puzzle. And? For me that gave me MORE motivation to figure out how to do it right. Because at the end of the day, I still wanted a marriage. I may not be able to have what I i…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 07:29 PM
5

Do keep in mind, RP is very much self improvement kinda masked behind the desire of men to get sex. So, its really no surprise many men show up and are PISSED they actually have to DO something to fix the situation. It is a bit of a bait and switch, but its also part and parcel as to why finding the RP sucks so much. Done right, it'll basically educate you on where YOU are failing, and despite the fact that the odds are stacked against you, failure is still very much YOUR problem. There is no si…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 07:14 PM
3

Lets be real: I'm concerned about that as well. But, that being said, I also don't think squashing RP is good as it does appear to work for many men. Which to me means the root of the problem isn't RP, its people being raised without that "core belief" system in the first place. That isn't something RP can fix.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 06:30 PM
3

If I had to pick one of these categories, yeah I'd agree. I found that I wasn't "hopeless", and in fact? As much as I found it horrible at first, the changes I needed to make weren't even all that drastic. Here I am on the other side, and despite my fears I'm still just me, with a slightly different PoV. I'll tell you that early on, I actually feared "going RP" would make me someone else entirely. Now that idea is so fucking silly to me it makes me embarrassed.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 05:59 PM
4

Guy A makes perfect sense. Picture a man that isn't "ugly", and in fact may be somewhat physically attractive, but he has glaring flaws like social anxiety. Or maybe he's too pudgy around the middle. In short, Guy A is often the dude that isn't completely "hopeless" from the gate, he just has some work to do. Guy B? I think many of them need to do a lot of work BEFORE they even consider a "sexual strategy" at all. Like, they need RP boot camp to even consider that they CAN improve. And some of t…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 05:56 PM
3

That's kinda been my hope. But its damn hard to deny there isn't a lot of proof for this theory out there.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 05:51 PM
3

I'm not sure... I think its a combo of millennials, as well as an influx of men from around the globe, which changes the PoV of the entire discussion a great deal.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 05:21 PM
3

Either way, she feels like she has to dance to his tune. Yep so much this! Which is why I tend to agree that for some men, just being a "domineering asshole" works. I can't say its great for the women they pair off with, but that's on them to figure out I guess. For my part, I just can't be bothered expending that much energy JUST to maintain a marriage. But, that's largely because I'm not naturally a domineering asshole. ;-)
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 05:20 PM
3

I see this as a result of two things: Feminism makes it clear where these issues are for women, so they are in everyone's mind daily. Feminism taught women "they need a man like a fish needs a bicycle", and while that may be true for general existence, that is NOT the correct attitude to have in a LTR/Marriage. In fact? You DO need that person, at least for as long as you are with them. I suppose it makes sense that perhaps Feminism had to go to such extremes to get the message out. I'd counter …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 05:05 PM
4

My ex is now married to what I describe as a common "Ohio redneck", so yes, high-dominance. Although, truly, I don't know if its high-dominance or truly just not giving a shit enough to be concerned. Again, he's a good enough guy, but by my estimation not nearly the brightest lightbulb in the box. I have NO DOUBT my ex is way smarter than him in raw IQ, he just doesn't give a shit at all. And I say that because he does NOT show "high-dominance" with other men necessarily. And in fact? I find it …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 04:56 PM
3

"I have balls therefore I am!"
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 04:40 PM
5

I owe Mr. Arthur better than a slide downhill into sloppily-dressed, overweight motherhood. Again, RP me agrees with you. BP me? I was supposed to love my wife EVEN MORE if she got fat after having MY babies! What kind of monster leaves the woman that got fat bearing him children?! Yeah, THAT was my mentality in the past. Hell, my ex DID get fat and out of shape, and NOT from having our kids, and I STILL managed to find ways to "want" her, at least right up until the day I realized she was not d…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 04:36 PM
4

In a funny, cartoonish way, I think you just described my first marriage. LOL I'll admit I had that mindset for a long time, and I'm not proud of that. Well how long was it that we as a society agreed that "men are pigs and only want one thing"? Yeah, its taken me a lot of years, but I'm beginning to see that men AND women were "lied to" an awful lot. I also think the reason men seem to be getting the short end of this new found knowledge is Feminism, and I don't mean that Feminism is necessaril…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 04:27 PM
1

I'm going to come out of left field here with a theory of mine that I've seen discussed around the 'sphere in the past. I and many others call it the "sneaky fucker" strategy. It goes something like this: In times when we lived in tribes of hunter/gatherers, the "hunters" tended to be out in the field a lot hunting, while some "beta" men stayed behind to tend to other work. While doing so, they were also presented with mating opportunities, which meant on occasion such 'betas' managed to procrea…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 04:18 PM
5

I actually agree with this, except for "minimum of effort." Well BP me agreed with that statement 100%. RP me realizes that even if I agree to it, reality says otherwise. And THAT is part and parcel of "the work" I talk about in marriage, because growing up "being a man worth fucking" was NEVER part of my programming to be a good husband and father. In fact? In many ways, being that kind of man struck me as the exact OPPOSITE of what I should be doing to prepare to become a husband and father. Y…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 04:06 PM
3

Has anyone noticed an influx of Guy B to this sub lately? From what I'm reading here and seeing elsewhere, there is an influx of Guy B everywhere in the 'sphere.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 04:02 PM
3

Humans are by and large "herd" animals. As such, humans expect other humans to conform to "herd" standards. Anyone that does not is automatically "weird", and we are a long way from being understanding enough as a society to get past that.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 03:56 PM
2

ROFL date 3 is kinda early for that discussion anyway, but gotta be dramatic for affect here! And honestly? If you don't feel something similar for the guy sitting across from you? Mentioning it is probably a bad idea, and truly my personal assessment would be to pass and keep looking. Ideally, I think you'd want to pair off with a guy that inspires that kind of response from you rather than push to pair off with someone that doesn't. And I am by NO MEANS telling you what to do with your life he…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 03:55 PM
4

I don't disagree with you, but that isn't a "male vs. female" issue as much as the fact that we as a society haven't really put much effort into thinking about it. We of course are aware that some people suffering from specific mental issues are "disadvantaged", but tend to only recognize it in the worst of cases. So someone with Autism is recognized as having a disability, but someone not as "high up the scale" may suffer some similar issues without nearly as much external appearances of such, …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 03:41 PM
1

OH yeah, there is no doubt that RP taught me the most important part for women when it comes to attraction seems to be the "intense feelings" part, or in other words I tend to believe women by and large "bond" emotionally. Of course, the real rub there is, men (or certainly men like me) do NOT bond that way. AT all. Which is why in the past I found things like idle chit chat with my ex annoying. I had NO CLUE how important it was for her, and as such didn't give it the proper attention it deserv…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 03:31 PM
9

I am a "male brained" women. If I'm not permitted in male fields it means I have no opportunities because my strengths are stereotypical male strengths. Show me a college that will NOT take you into a STEM major because you are a woman. Show me where you are being denied your chance to do what you want legally. Because if what you're saying is "its hard to break into a male dominated field because vagina", I'm going to say "yep, push harder to get what you want." Ya know, just like your sisters …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 03:22 PM
2

What feminists mean when they say differences are not that big, is that women are actual human beings, with ambition and personal will just like men, even if their outlook of the world is different Even if men and women are 99.9999% the same, what's the problem in looking at the small differences in detail? Seems to me if we are indeed so similar, THAT is where we should be putting our effort. Great, we are almost all exactly alike! Now, what makes us different?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 03:19 PM
6

Pure democracy leads to tyranny of the majority. Which is exactly why the USA is NOT a pure Democracy. ;-)
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 03:16 PM
2

I honestly think the whole "women can't pair bond after sex with multiple men" thing is "hamstering" men fall on to rationalize their discomfort with her former sexual experience. It's one of those "it's me not you" things IMO. No, I think the mechanism is different. I'll agree, I don't think women necessarily "pair bond" directly through sex while men mostly may. However, that does NOT mean that a woman having sex with many different men is not causing issue to her ability to pair bond. If inde…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 03:08 PM
2

Some of her most intense feelings of closeness to and for him or often not even attributed to PIV or sexual intimacy, but other forms of intimacy - maybe he kissed her on the forehead and carried her upstairs when she fell asleep, shit like that. I understand that, I think the issue is many women don't get it past their side of the equation. They get the hugs/cuddles/etc and think everything is hunky dory. As to what I have or haven't said, do NOT use me as any form of RP representation. The mor…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 02:41 PM
2

ROFL truth! I'm RP partly because I view humans as animals FIRST, and conscious beings second. Because to me, our animal nature is the operating system we run on, and all this enlightened knowledge is at best patches. Its easy to see when anytime there is some kind of large scale emergency, people tend to revert to that animal nature to survive.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 02:15 PM
1

I've always said the actual N isn't as important as how she got it. If sex/orgasm is a natural "pair bond" button, but humans have the ability to override it for "fun", I'm looking for a woman that was more interested in not wearing out the button than having fun. It seems to me any person that constantly overrides a natural urge is going to have issues WITH that natural urge down the road. So a woman that resists pair bonding for fun in my mind is risking the ability to pair bond later in life.…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 01:50 PM
3

I already feel. For my SO (and I think most men), it's what makes him feel loved and connected in the first place. As much as my wife might prefer otherwise, the best way she can show ME love and affection is with sex. Flat out no doubt. Snuggling, cuddling, spending time together, ect is great and I truly enjoy it, but it does NOT really make me feel 'closer' to my wife at all. The sex is what makes me feel close to her, and that is why I find spending time with her enjoyable. And in fact? Snug…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 01:34 PM
5

I think you overestimate how much control we have over our emotional states. We can react to them, not control them. Humans tend to be rather sure of their superiority over "nature" all the time. Humans are prone to error.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 01:25 PM
2

I just find that women tend to be more controlled about when they do/don't feel things re: sex. When I read this, I immediately thought "women are sexually stoic!" This is the kind of crap I have to put up with from my own thought processes. :P
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/17 01:16 PM
3

We, men, are projecting a lot in this regard. Yep. We want that "deeper meaning" in sex to flow both ways. This is true and a a hard pill for men to swallow. The harsh part of course is learning its not possible, and it never was.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/17 08:56 PM
1

Thank you for the vote of confidence. ;-) It works well if both people are on board with it and keeping the health of the marriage at the forefront. I have no doubt at all that it can and probably does go very wrong if/when that isn't the case. I can also see why some people wouldn't be happy with the arrangement, but I don't think its something that can be decided simply based on some "dominance" level. I don't think its nearly that cut and dry, like most things we discuss here.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/17 06:23 PM
3

TRP didn't invent flirting or socializing either. No but they figured out how to explain it to men that didn't "just get it". So, ya know, an ANTI-social way to explain being social.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/17 05:28 PM
1

I know a lot of RP women just like this, I don't see being submissive to a man as always meaning she's some shrinking violet. Fair enough, and not a surprise from you actually. I do get the impression that many BPers assume a First Mate must be an incompetent adult of a woman. And I'm certainly not trying to talk you into a C/Fm marriage. However I am highlighting similarities because I think many women in general might be surprised at who among their ranks would not only do well in one, but may…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/17 05:23 PM
1

But us naturally non-submissive women still can be very worthy for LTRs. What makes you think a woman has to be "submissive" in the classic sense for a C/FM marriage? You describe yourself as "high-dom", which I assume means you tend to "take charge" and get stuff done. (if I'm wrong, go with me here anyway LOL) Your husband is the same as you described. So, two "high-dom" people had to find a balance or you'd be constantly struggling with power, right? Realize that a C/Fm setup ALSO solves that…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/17 04:12 PM
1

But do you respect and value your own female partner? Yes Do you listen to her advise or do you decide alone without heeding wise counsel? Part of why I respect her is the fact that her "counsel" has proven useful over time. I actually rely on her to provide a different PoV when I'm making decisions. As my First mate, this is an imperative part of her duties in our marriage. How do you show her respect? At a basic level, I show her respect by treating her like a fully capable adult making the de…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/17 03:46 PM
1

I will by all means bow to your knowledge! I fully admit I know very little about mental illness. Primarily my point was in the lower classes, much of it goes completely without diagnoses or treatment, no matter what type of illness it is. And as such, I'd imagine they tend to spread among that class of folks rather well. Even if you consider that many of those illnesses aren't hereditary, that still means those children are being raised by a parent(s) with nondiagnosed mental issues, and as suc…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/17 03:32 PM
1

My wife's brother became addicted through pain pills after back surgery. New Hampshire is really struggling with Heroin right now according to her family back home. We just started to see it here over the last year or so, but its been an obvious problem up there for a few. And yep, her brother's doc prescribed Oxy like it was Skittles. Not an excuse, but I think there was a serious lack of management for some time with pain medications, and although I don't think its a root cause, it was certain…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/17 03:27 PM
2

And I guess I could understand if a girl has a criminal record and drug addiction it's not a stretch to see her behaving as TRP often describes women. The ones with a known criminal record aren't the problem. Its the women like her that maybe haven't been caught yet, and/or aren't as wild but close you need to worry about. And as to where to find such women? Do you hang out with musicians? DJ's? Anyone in the bar/club business? I've spent most of my adult life in the local music circles, (rock/m…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/17 03:12 PM
1

NO not at all. My implication is: we have NO CLUE how many working class folks may have mental illnesses, because by and large they don't go to the doctor. As such, it seems likely that such mental illnesses are also being passed on without knowledge, and its well known that poor people tend to have a lot of kids. So, just by volume of children born and nondiagnosed issues in the poorer parts of society, I'd say the chances of meeting a poor person with issues they aren't even aware of themselve…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/17 03:05 PM
1

I've heard Columbus was bad, but I wasn't really surprised since its right on 70, and as such I'm sure a LOT of drugs pass through on the way to the east coast. Its still surprising to me when I hear of these little towns I knew as a young man that were thriving are now dealing with massive drug problems. These just are NOT the kinds of places I'd have expected it 20 years ago. Booze? Sure, they've been making it themselves for years. Weed? Sure, they've been growing it there for years. But the …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/17 03:01 PM
3

My hypothesis is that rightism is what happens when you’re optimizing for surviving an unsafe environment, leftism is what happens when you’re optimized for thriving in a safe environment. I've been thinking along these lines for some time now. Gonna have to dig into your link. ;-)
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/17 02:52 PM
1

But other serious stuff like schizophrenia or bipolar very often has a strong genetic factor, so is pretty class blind. But consider that MC+ folks often at least KNOW they are bipolar, and its easy to see the likelihood of more BPD types in the lower classes. Non-Diagnosed parents having random kids will spread it around. In other words, just like other diseases tend to spread in the lower classes, I'd not be surprised to find mental illness (certainly untreated!) is prevalent in the WC and poo…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/17 02:49 PM
1

Wow Chillicothe has a Heroin problem?! That's a few hours away from me, but I'm familiar with it. Its been awhile, but the last time I drove through it was still a relatively quiet town that looked to be doing OK, despite often smelling like boiled cabbage due to the paper plant. :( We have people ODing in the local car wash parking lots around here. The neighbor two doors down manages a local Jiffy lube, and he came to work one morning to find a guy out behind the wheel of his car sitting in a …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/17 02:44 PM
1

Mostly? I'm of the opinion that most folks WILL be damaged by having too much casual sex, but "too much" varies from person to person. Maybe some are lucky and avoid the worst of it, but in my mind each encounter is like lead poisoning: the level of poison just keeps building. Sure, that's just my opinion. One based on observation and some little bits of evidence that has plenty of room to improve. But this is MY ass I'm covering. I don't care if I'm being a little bit over reactive about it. It…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/16 04:04 PM
1

Hell no! I don't want just a high RMV woman, I'm looking for high in both. I'm a sexual being and as such still want to satisfy the kinds of sexual desires expressed in casual encounters, but I want to have those with one woman I know and trust. I want some of that more "casual" reaction from her sexually, but wishin the confines of a LTR. I don't want to sacrifice raw sexual response for better RMP traits. I want my fried ice well done. ;-)
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/16 03:57 PM
1

Yep
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/16 03:51 PM
1

Yeah I do. Not my choice in each case to move on. Do keep in mind though, I never claimed to have a goal of an N = 1 marriage. I don't prize virginity at all, moderation and discretion however are key. My preference would be to pair off with a woman like me tha has never had casual sex experiences, but that's damned near impossible. In short: I've been looking for my future wife since I turned 16. I'm looking for a woman that was similarly serious about it, or if not, didn't spend a lot of years…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/16 03:50 PM
1

It was a lot to fit into a single sentence!
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 08:58 PM
1

It was tongue in cheek. I'm just always pleasantly surprised when someone understand that Captain does not equal asshole controlling douchebag by default.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 08:47 PM
1

Isn't there already evidence that marriages that start later last longer? Sure, but we had to wait for the "greatest generation" to start dying before we could truly measure the longevity benchmark. It ain't over til its all over. Gen X is just now getting close to the golden years, and we can easily see what a shit show they made. I'm going to be near my death bed (provided I live a long happy life) before we can truly see if these later marriages go the distance.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 08:43 PM
1

I just don't see this as a conflicting relationship. Thank you! Can you inform the more extreme bloopers here of that please? :P C/Fm isn't when done properly. Like I said, the purpose is actually to REMOVE the conflict, by removing any doubt about who is or is not in charge. There is no power struggle if it isn't up for debate. I don't think it's so much that women's needs are in conflict with men, I think that we have forgotten that relationships should be about supporting one another, and for…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 08:40 PM
1

I'm saying why is it so crazy to think mom should be primary caregiver after the divorce if you yourself decided she was the best caregiver to them before the divorce? I didn't say that AT ALL! I wasn't concerned they wouldn't be taken care of, I was concerned I'd never get to see them because she was moving over 5 hours away. Other than the fact that she couldn't afford to support them on her own, she was no less able to raise them than myself. If I thought she was a danger to our children, I w…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 08:36 PM
1

They also have to confess to masturbation and unseemly thoughts about boys. I realize that now sure. Back then? We were led to believe women NEVER had such unclean thoughts! Where do you think I learned "women are wonderful" from? Church and enforced at home. Men were pigs and aggressive, women were the positive influence that calmed the wild beast. Which is also why getting married was equated to "settling down". It wasn't because we "settled" on looks, it was because we expected our wives to s…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 08:31 PM
2

Worse? I think that type of control is only partially learned, and partially biology. I truly believe for some people "resisting the urge" is literally harder than for others. I'd call that a disability myself.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 08:23 PM
2

Didn't think so. I chose to reply to your thread partly because I don't expect a rabid attack back, not so much because I am personally trying to change your PoV. Hope you don't mind, but you are rather reasonable and make a great sounding board. I still know people my age that do the Church thing every Sunday. Its far from a dead practice, but I'll admit I have no clue if or how much they've eased up on the shame these days.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 08:22 PM
1

if you didn't think mom raising the kids was best for them then why did you agree to it? If you think dad could do a better job then why didn't you agree to that before? I'm not sure I understand the questions. In my case? My ex was and continues to be a very good mother. In so much that when she dedicates time and attention to them, she takes very good care of them. One of us had to work, and I had the potential to earn more, so she stayed home. At the time I did NOT and still do not consider t…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 08:19 PM
3

as a former fat person I know. Been there, done that, have the stretch marks and loose skin to show for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 08:05 PM
2

Uh, thank nature and biology for that? Babe? That actually helps prove his point. And I mostly agree.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 08:02 PM
3

No it isn't. Biology is always running in the background influencing your conscious choices. At some times, even completely overriding them. Humans think they have control over their animal nature, but that control often hangs by a thin thread.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 08:01 PM
3

Oh I know, but those of you that have spent most of your lives without organized religion seem to think those of us that were somehow just "got over it" during our lifetimes. Its great that for the past 20 years or so that kind of thing hasn't happened as much. That doesn't negate the experiences of those that suffered through it, nor does it imply others still aren't suffering it. EDIT: to add. and Catholicism was certainly rather "mainstream" not so long ago in the US, and still is in many poc…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:56 PM
1

I believe relationships can be far more reciprocal than RPers seem to believe. I'm actually pretty much in agreement. The cease fire is as good as as bad as the two that make the deal. It can be stellar, or total shit. I don't see a C/Fm marriage as a power struggle so much as a way to ensure the cease fire is properly arbitrated. Of course, the chink in that armor is if the Captain sucks. Since I'm not going to marry a man nor look for a Captain myself, that isn't my problem to solve or concern…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:55 PM
2

I get it. I'm saying porn is a release valve of sorts, not a solution in any way. And for many its only a temporary release valve at that. In my case, it'll take "the edge" off for a short time, but it really doesn't diminish my overall desire for a sexual partner. At all. It certainly isn't going to help much past say short dry spell. From my previous experience, I get to about the 9 month mark before I just can't ignore it anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:50 PM
4

If men's sexuality and sex drives were so mercilessly persecuted the way it's quoted in the OP I spent the first six years of my life in a Catholic grade school I assure you, my sexuality was persecuted. I felt guilty as fuck just touching myself for years after. Do you have any idea what it feels like to have to "confess your sins" to someone as a 12 year old because you rubbed one out?!
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:41 PM
1

Let's see if all these "better" marriage's that start in the 30's last the long haul, and then we can talk with more data.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:38 PM
2

Well to an extent I am "at war" with women, if my needs and desires counter theirs. Further? I tend to see LTRs/Marriages as individual "peace agreements" of a sort, where both husband and wife sign a cease fire with each other, in the interests of the collective good. And divorce is just like being the one that shoots first and breaks that agreement, provided its an "I'm just unhappy" type of divorce.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:37 PM
1

To some extent, extreme feminism and those less extreme that quietly support it behind the scenes for one.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:34 PM
2

There would be no porn or sex industry whatsoever if that was the case. What? There would be much less porn industry if men were able to follow their true sexual desires freely. Porn to me is mostly a reflection of all the sexual desire men do not get the chance to try. I mean, do most men look up porn depicting vanilla starfish sex? Probably some, but I bet the audience is limited. No, they're looking up the types of sex they never have and never will likely get to try. And, to some extent, it …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:31 PM
2

doesn't that refute the point that men are inherently drawn towards rape? No. It means you have the willpower to properly "control" your natural male desires. Maybe you've been conditioned so well you don't even realize it, but more likely you've always had relatively easy access to sex, so you've never faced it head on regularly.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:28 PM
2

if you people call it the sexual market, wouldn't things of equal "sexual market value" be properly matched through market forces like in the real economy Some of us, like myself, feel the current market is being artificially manipulated, and as a fan of free markets, I don't see that as a good thing in most cases.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:22 PM
2

and trying to assign the blame for that to women and society is counter-productive to say the least. Can't CYV because I mostly agree. I'll admit, I toss my pre-RP PoV into these discussions sometimes to give it that perspective, but once a guy has gotten past the "anger phase" and digested all this, he should bet over blaming anyone other than himself. However, I believe many BPers could use a little understanding as to why so many men end up with that PoV in the first place. And it makes for s…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:19 PM
1

I don't think we should pathologize abstinence. Please explain if you would. I'm not calling for complete abstinence. That's not possible if people are going to put off marriage until 30ish. I'm asking for, again, moderation. A little consideration past "it feels good so why not?" Abstinence is a pipe dream in our existing environment. And I'm not 100% sure true abstinence is any better than fucking like cats, as you put it.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:12 PM
1

If there is a hell, I've probably done a lot to pave my path into it. Maybe I can get my own wing!
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:09 PM
1

Right, so as I was saying, your belief is completely superstitious. You can't prove that conclusively yet, so no, its not. but don't claim that they have validity beyond your existence. Why not? Religion is nothing more than organized superstition, and its largely responsible for the civilization we live in today. If nothing else, it may be completely valid for other men that think as I do. Don't claim other men can't learn from the validity of my perception of my existence.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:08 PM
1

This is a fallacious argument because men will plug away for ages in order to get into a girl's pants and then dump her. You know this, I know this, everyone knows this. Its the same battle of the sexes its always been, mate. We're just now finally dragging it all out into the light and exposing it for what it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:05 PM
1

From the article: The proffered reasons for millennial abstinence? A culture of overwork and an obsession with career status, a fear of becoming emotionally involved and losing control, an online-dating milieu that privileges physical appearance above all, anxieties surrounding consent, and an uptick in the use of libido-busting antidepressants. I firmly believe is at least partly true. Do you think that's a good thing? I don't. THAT was my point.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:04 PM
1

are you saying you've seen cases where mom got primary custody but dad kept the house? At best I've seen the house being sold off and proceeds divided. Custody is often the exact method used to eject and keep a man out of the house he lived in. Because the kids need somewhere to sleep, and mom can't afford a decent home on her own.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:00 PM
2

Yep agreed. I'll become optimistic about it when that trend continues. Maybe in another 10 or so years. Until then? Not enough evidence to suggest it'll last.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:58 PM
3

but I don't think you can make the argument that it is equally good for every guy. First of all, you know I'm not the type of RP man that believes RP is the only true way. Second, I absolutely can, and should, so that other men that read my posts and agree can possibly find a similar path and make it work for them as well. If not? They didn't pay one cent for my "advice", so they got exactly what it was worth. By all means, if a guy thinks I'm crazy, he should absolutely ignore me. But if anythi…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:56 PM
2

I"m sorry, but I don't follow. Are you sure your reply was meant for me?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:53 PM
1

my boyfriend and I actually have a list of couples we know who we think will be divorced by 40, because we are terrible people. The aforementioned friend and her hubby were at the top of our list... My ex and I did this at our "marriage class" the Church required. We were figuring out who would most likely end divorced within 5 years. We totally blew that out of the water by more than double! Maybe karma is a real bitch. :P
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:52 PM
1

What happens if women get with someone, and she wants commitment and he implies that he will, but has no intention of doing so? Same thing that happens to a man that gets taken in by a gold digger: they suffer the consequences for their bad decision. Do better next time. Or ya know, you could NOT have sex on the second date. You know, as RP advocates! I don't know about you, but I mostly "advocate" for myself. I'll align myself with RP men if/when it suits me, but don't think for one moment I fe…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:49 PM
2

Also, we do not know that having casual sex damages women. I don't need proof personally. I simply don't want to marry a high N formerly promiscuous woman. As to participating in the RP? People tend to congregate with like minded folks. As you can see I'm all about discussing the "why" of my preferences, but if scientific proof came out tomorrow completely disproving that casual sex has any negative side effects for women? I still don't want to marry a slut. I still think casual sex OVERALL is b…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:44 PM
1

I just basically explained to you why I don't see it as nonsense. FWIW.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:40 PM
2

No need to apologize. I'm not saying I even agree with this PoV. I'm simply explaining it as its been explained to me. You are conversing with a man who's step-daughter CHOSE to stay with instead of going with her bio-mom in the divorce. I was hurt and upset when my ex tossed out the D word, but what crushed me was I knew she wanted to move back home, which meant out of state. Not seeing my kids drove me to consider offing myself, more than once. But, my ex wasn't in the position to have them wi…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:39 PM
3

So why is it so damned hard to show something so simple to the masses? You summed up most of my issues with the SMP in two sentences. LOL
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:31 PM
2

At the very least, teen pregnancy has dropped quite a bit though, which I think means less single moms as well. In general yes true. Around here and other poorer areas? NOt even close. Which is why I say, although its grand that the MC on up seems to be righting itself somewhat, its still chaos down here in the trenches. And? with the economy being as it is, people are starting to fall INTO those trenches.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:28 PM
3

I'm mostly on board with OPs description honestly. But please do NOT consider my PoV to be standard for RP. I'm probably one of the most sexually conservative men I've ever spoken to in the 'sphere. I've taken sex and relationships "seriously" since I was 16. And I put that in quotes because what constitutes serious at 16 is a far cry from the same at 30. But, in each case, I intended to eventually make that woman my wife. Even my first LTR mate at 16. I just wasn't willing to marry until I felt…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:26 PM
2

No difference man or woman. If you can't keep a LTR for more than a year, and you jump to the next quickly? Same as a hard core CC rider in my book, and I'm not a fan of male ponies on the CC. And actually? if you were a woman I just met, and you told me you were 10 years monogamous and THEN when on a rampage? You'd be off my list before I wrapped up the evening. I wouldn't be rude, but I wouldn't call back either. You'd have a better shot if you went nuts in your 20's, and then spent 10 years i…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:21 PM
2

While that may be true for people you know, that is not always the case. I know plenty of people, men and women, who are simply sex positive, polyamorous people. They have lots of sex, yes, but they also form meaningful and respectful relationships when they do, and learn a lot from each other. I can admit I believe this. But in my mind, I'm about as repulsed by polyamory as casual sex, so it makes no difference to me. You can't make a blanket statement about women or men based on the fact they …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:17 PM
3

Start a thread on this perhaps? You know my opinion on this doesn't follow RP norms, but this isn't the thread for that conversation.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:15 PM
2

Women will be attracted to men they aren't attracted to if they ignore their base, primal attraction -- don't you even TRP? Incorrect. IN my opinion, if there is any "ask" from RP on this, its that women should perhaps be a bit more future-time oriented when it comes to mating and dating. I don't expect women to remain virgins until marriage at 30. I also don't expect them to bang all comers until then. If I'm going to marry this woman, what I really want to see in her history is that she mostly…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:12 PM
2

RP advises men to spin plates and avoid commitment, so how do women know whether men will commit to them before they have sex with them? This is exactly why some of us say the SMP is broken. It should NOT be this damned hard to find like minded people. My advice to men: push for sex early and often. My advice to women: push off sex until commitment. So, who's going to blink first?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:08 PM
1

So women should avoid having sex with men they're attracted to when they're younger, and this will then result in them being more attracted to betas in later life? Not at all! They should LTR up guys they are "attracted to" and start learning experiences OTHER than with their vagina that'll help them later in life with their marriages. Hence ending up 28 years old with an N of around 3-4, which in my estimation is about the sweet spot. Your mileage may vary. And? if they immediately find that th…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:06 PM
2

Just that if they have more than 2 bfs in 10 years they rode the cc Quote where he said that. 2 LTRs over 10 years is pretty fucking stellar if she didn't ALSO add a few notches along the way. In fact? I'd say that's about ideal. She's proven she can stick it out for longer than a year, and she's had a lot of experience compromising and getting a 'feel' for how a relationships works. Also? She hasn't likely been screwed over by "bad boys" in her past, so less jaded overall.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 05:58 PM
2

I read that recently. I see it as a good thing. But the reasons for it listed aren't so savory. Why can't we have some form of sexual control without it causing mental issues? Moderation people. Moderation!
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 05:55 PM
3

As usual I'm on board with your definition. OF COURSE most want the CC to ONLY be ONS and casual sex. To me, if you can't manage to keep a LTR more than a year, it simply doesn't count as anything OTHER than casual, certainly if you have 5 or more such "relationships" in your history sprinkled with "scratching the itch" between.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 05:51 PM
1

people learn how to break up, not how to stay together. My thoughts exactly.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 05:46 PM
4

For both genders I might add. I personally agree. But I'm in the minority on that one in the 'sphere for sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 05:43 PM
5

You "get it". ;-)
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 05:42 PM
3

More than one new partner a year and she is a "carousel rider" according to you? I think one a year is extreme personally.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 05:41 PM
3

Fuck if I'm leaving my husband alone with a divorcee. I don't know about your circles, but in most cases when I've witnessed a divorce, along with the house and assets the friends are usually split as well. And in most cases, the women of course sided with the wife, and the husbands friends who are married to those women bailed on the man, because their wives of course sided with his soon-to-be-ex. There is no divorced women among the ranks of married men, so a divorcee is not threat to her own …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 04:02 PM
3

Like, I wasn't trying to be insulting. I didn't really take it that way, and I understand that by and large the trend has already changed somewhat, but around here (rural Ohio and PA) young kids are still marrying, but not in the numbers they did 20 years ago for sure. But worse? The trend of single mothers has done nothing but rise, so we've possibly traded a crappy situation (young first marriages ending in divorce) for another. (more children born to unwed mothers.) I have very little knowled…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 02:59 PM
3

Back when a 30-year-old woman could easily be a decade into her marriage. You make this sound like ancient history. Those "back when's" were my youth, and many of us and our children (I assume around your age?) are still dealing with the repercussions. We're only one generation away from this, and you're ready to sweep it under the rug like yesterday's news. It's still happening outside the bastions of enlightenment known as the coasts, but admittedly as marriage rates drop, so does the divorce …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 08:38 AM
4

That's a valid POV that doesn't change the fact that the more you fight, the tighter she squeezes. I do get what you're saying, but it's easy to say until it's your own children crying while your ex makes a stink when you arrive for visitation. Amd when the cops arrive they say they can't help; take it up with the courts. And THEN she turns around and tells your kids it's your fault, because you were mean to her. And your left sitting in your car, 2 hours away from home, outside what used to be …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 08:28 AM
1

Because custody is a primary method of executing divorce rape. In most cases they come with the house, a car, and a monthly income that isn't taxed or audited for accountability.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 08:19 AM
2

I don't think I could live with myself continuing to make my children suffer. Luckily I didn't have to make that choice because my ex wasn't a rutheless bitch willing to use our children against me. I know beyond all doubt a few of my buddies were not so fortunate. Have you ever talked to a man that truly believes the best thing he can do for his children is to lay down and take it without a fight? I have and its heart wrenching. Worst part? They're usually right.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 08:05 AM
1

I just can't imagine women my age being envious of a divorced friend Well that's good news! Probably generational as well as regional. Most everyone I know married the first time early, around 22-24. I was 26, but my ex was 22 when we got married. And again, most of those imploded around 30, or not so surprisingly about 7 to 10 years in. My buddy on marriage #3? First one didn't last a year. She was crazy, and I don't say that to be glib. But, most of us also felt like mid 20's was when we were …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:40 AM
1

Of all our coupled friends, only one couple is still in their first marriage. Most are on #2. My best buddy is on #3. Most of the first divorces happened in their early 30's. By that standard, my ex and I did stellar. I was 38 when we divorced and we made it almost 13 years. By far the longest first marriage of all our divorced friends. That one couple still on the first? Married right after college. No kids, both professionals. They have dogs instead of children. Both not from around here origi…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 07:04 AM
2

Well when I say waste my time I really mean hobbies. None of which are profitable, hence "waste of time".
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:47 AM
1

Most that married in the early 20's were divorced by the early 30's. One woman I knew through extended circles threw herself a "rebachelorette" party, her friends thought it was an awesome idea. They weren't embarrassed, I think it was more like a badge of honor or some rite of passage. "I survived divorce and got full custody! Time to hit the market for the next round."
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:36 AM
1

Count 2. I'd love to be rich enough to waste my time 24x7.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:20 AM
2

Would you? Even if it cost you every dime you have to support them with? Even if fighting made your ex angry enough to do everything they can to hurt you? As far as lying to your children about you to do so? I call it weaponizing of children for a reason, and it will shut down any fight you think you have very quickly when unleashed.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 06:17 AM
3

IN many case men "pass it off" to women because those women care more about how it's done than sharing the workload. If you want help with the dishes, don't critique how I accomplish it. You can do it yourself if that's how it is. I find my wife mostly does certain things, I mostly do certain things, and we take turns on the stuff we both hate. I know, it almost sounds egalitarian! Don't worry, I'll find some other way to flex my authority.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 05:59 AM
1

I've fully accepted my choice was mine, and I'd do it again because as you said, I have my kids. Lots of women would prefer to be "the man" so that they'll never be left out in the cold with no way to support herself. And this is why I'm of the mind whatever we have currently doesn't work that well for many, I 100% understand why you feel this way. I don't blame you in the least. Here I sit, willing to do what I can to allow a SAHM situation, and I risk that backfiring on me. I'd be asking you t…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 05:40 AM
1

LOL! What I have isn't a plan at all. It's at best a train of thought at this point. I don't know law, and I'm no MRA. I mostly speak on this subject from personal experience both my own and observed among my social circle. I get its extreme as presented, and would never expect it to fly. It's for discussion and debate. Like I said, the first step is to get past the notion that mom is the default best parent when that choice must be made because of divorce. I'm all for individual couples working…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 04:26 AM
0

Do you have me confused for someone else? I'm the type of man that will work a career he doesn't enjoy to allow his wife to stay home, because I value it that much. But where is the credit for my sacrifice if she decides to leave later? RP taught me there IS no credit for my sacrifice, so why does she get credit for hers? And this is all about what's best for the kids in the event of divorce. Easy way to avoid it? Don't get divorced. But, if it happens, do you honestly believe it is ALWAYS best …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 03:44 AM
1

There is only one reason to purposely become a parent: you want to have children. If you're claiming the cost is too high? Welcome to equality. Men have been paying with their checkbook a for years now.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 03:33 AM
2

It's the Internet! Other than porn, what's it good for if not ruffling feathers?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 03:20 AM
0

The court prioritizes the parent who spent more of the caretaking and more effort on the child. That's why moms get more PRCs and fathers pay more child support. Right, because fathers prefer putting in those extra hours and missing time with their kids. Let me say it again. You are making the assumption the man in question wanted to work long hours. Your are also assuming he wants that career at all. Sure, it was his choice to take it, but maybe he chose it so she could stay home with the kids.…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/16 02:12 AM
6

But what this fails to account for is the small, yet ultimately meaningful, sacrifices women make in their careers. I don't see it that way. It is recognized, and its the price she paid to have her family. She's giving up some possible future career success in exchange for a family today. Men and women don't necessarily make the same trade-offs to have a family, and this is one of those differences. If she's afraid of that possible outcome? Don't get married and start a family. I say the same to…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 09:00 PM
1

Nice! Glad to see people are still joining the hobby! (and yet again ousting myself as having nerd tendencies...) I've had my ticket since '94, but I haven't been active in over 15 years. A buddy of mine just got his general, and he's causing me to get the itch again by telling me about all the digital modes available now. Thing is, I need to get my General for most of that, and I'm lazy as hell. :P EDIT: to add. FWIW, if you have the ambition, study for your general now as well. If you pass the…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 06:50 PM
1

That is by far the best description of the possible mechanics behind the "alpha widow". I always understood it on some level, but kudos for putting that into words so well. Or, maybe not since I understand it. LOL I used to say its essentially competing with the ghost of an ex, because she isn't really comparing you to the actual man, she's comparing you to her MEMORY of the man.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 06:45 PM
2

they refuse to answer any questions about their Ns because their pasts are "none of the man's business". That's more than answer enough for me though.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 06:06 PM
1

LOL. It takes very little effort on my part to look like the guy that is hating everyone around him with his gaze. In fact? For many, all I have to do is look them in the eye I swear.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 05:33 PM
3

usually she'll do it for a while till th kids start school but this puts you at risk of divorce rape. So much this! I'm sure many here consider it mercenary, but before I married a second time I considered all this, in detail. My wife has an established work history. She has worked the entire time I've known her. NONE of our children are so young that we need a full time SAHP. We do NOT have any children together. If this goes south someday, she will NOT get alimony. She will NOT get child suppo…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 05:05 PM
1

I have the male equivalent of resting bitch face. I've been told I look pissed off when I'm simply not expressing any emotion on my face. Add to it I'm 5'11", and not exactly scrawny (don't take that to mean ripped/cut, I'm just thick in general) and most people steer clear of me on their own. Not as much in the office as when I'm out in private life. I have to dress accordingly for work, and occasionally someone will chat me up because business casual with security guards seems to be enough to …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 04:43 PM
3

I have no clue about advertising value, but I personally enjoy the back and forth, and on occasion will admit that something I've read here has caused me to adjust my views. Of course, that's because i don't see RP as THE ONE WAY, and I'm always open to suggestions that'll get me what I want, no matter what "color" it flies under.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 04:30 PM
17

Women are NOT made of sugar, spice, and everything nice, they are made from the same shit men are, and can be expected to be as good or bad as men as a consequence.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 04:16 PM
2

The second I got engaged the old boys club started giving a shit about me Amazing, isn't it? I went from hourly to be full-time salary within six months of getting married. I remember my boss saying something along the lines of "you seem to be taking on more responsibility in stride, and I think you earned this." At the time I assumed it was because of my job performance, but looking back, all us single techs were hourly, but all the "older married" ones were salary. I don't know if this is stil…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 03:32 PM
4

ROFLMAO! That doesn't work.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 03:28 PM
4

I think they view it as an ideal setup, but it definitely is not actualizable in modern society without severe risk Pretty much this. I realize its an extra risk, but I see it as a better setup for a C/Fm marriage, and as I've stated many times here, I kinda need a wife with a flexible(ish) work schedule, because mine is fairly rigid. Most "career" women are in the same pickle I am in that respect. Also, keep in mind, not every man alive is rolling in circles filled with career women. Most of th…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 03:19 PM
4

I guess we can call it dadsplaining when done to them. I do an awful lot of that with teenage boys in the house, and now that I think on it, its pretty damn similar! I'm stealing this, but I'll give you credit :P
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 03:15 PM
2

There are lawyers here that can probably be more official on this, but I do not believe US law requires anything of the sort. My wife tells me that since she is a medical assistant, and is trained in emergency medical care, that she is supposedly somewhat "required" to offer assistance if she comes upon an accident or something. I'd prefer she didn't, but that's me being selfish about her well being more than anything else. Morally, I'd feel compelled to help, and what I find sad is in the moder…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 03:03 PM
6

And I think that's a very apt analogy! Lets say marriage is just like a Big Mac: tastes really good, but lacks real vitamins and minerals. (please don't go pull up the stats on a BM, I really don't care if they are actually high in vitamin B or something) If I want a Big Mac, would it make sense to just go shove one down my throat, or maybe should I plan on how I'm going to work that off before I eat it, and decide for myself it I want to jog an extra 3 miles to offset it. Marriage isn't a requi…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 02:46 PM
5

Why would they marry >99% of these types of women? They seem to bring little to no value with high risk. There is only one valid reason for a man to marry IMO: because he wanted to. I have no idea why a "high value" man might marry a 30-something woman, but I'll go ahead and assume HE finds value in it. And yes, it also brings risk. Depending on a mans' situation, potentially a very large risk. If the value added doesn't offset the risk? Don't get married. I can type out paragraphs for reasons w…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 02:31 PM
1

when RPers are wrong, they are spectacularly wrong. Personally its not my color, I just hate to half-ass anything. So, if I'm wrong, I'm gonna be REALLY freaking wrong. And then probably take the next 6 months to contemplate where I went so off the rails. LOL
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 01:39 PM
1

Are you an amateur radio operator? Not many people use CQ at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 01:38 PM
1

Just retook the test: Still INTJ. Still male. Still Red.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 01:32 PM
1

Still an INTJ, although my percentages are a bit different on this particular test, they are all still high.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 01:31 PM
1

Mostly, because F types don't handicap ourselves when it comes to making connections the way T types do You call it a handicap, I call it a filter. ;-) Of course, being INTJ, I don't want or need many friends, so to be honest I tend to walk around looking a bit unapproachable on purpose, because I actually don't want to chat up randos.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/16 01:24 PM
2

Holy shit, I'm almost in tears just imagining that. I think she was more upset about him getting it removed than he was. Well, let me rephrase: she was more upset about the concept of him getting it removed. I'm sure he was less than pleased overall. And ya know, I've never asked him if he has to sit down to piss now ROFL.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 09:48 PM
2

See, I get that it appears that way now, but all I can say is it wasn't always so. Used to be most noobs showed up, vented a bit, and were then basically handed their asses and told to sit down, shut up, and start reading. I have no clue when that stopped. But I completely agree, bitter nor angry is a long term solution. However, they can be great short term motivators until real improvements are made.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 09:45 PM
1

See, I get that it appears that way now, but all I can say is it wasn't always so. Used to be most noobs showed up, vented a bit, and were then basically handed their asses and told to sit down, shut up, and start reading. I have no clue when that stopped. But I completely agree, bitter nor angry is a long term solution. However, they can be great short term motivators until real improvements are made.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 09:45 PM
1

See, I get that it appears that way now, but all I can say is it wasn't always so. Used to be most noobs showed up, vented a bit, and were then basically handed their asses and told to sit down, shut up, and start reading. I have no clue when that stopped. But I completely agree, bitter nor angry is a long term solution. However, they can be great short term motivators until real improvements are made.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 09:45 PM
3

and a very VERY sensitive cervix. That sucks! Don't get me wrong, I realize any real pounding on the cervix will hurt like hell, but I enjoy bottoming out every once in awhile when things get a little rough. Mostly from behind. (sorry if that's TMI LOL) I have a buddy that used to have a Prince Albert (a ring through the piss hole and out the bottom of his penis head if you don't know :P) He had to have it removed, because it was scarring his wife's cervix. I'd never get my penis pierced in the …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 09:42 PM
2

I'd counter that for many, RP is exactly that.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 09:36 PM
3

Yep, one data point for your collection. ;-)
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 09:34 PM
1

That depends largely on the particular task at hand. I've spent 12 hours straight sitting in the dark working on a song/mix without one moment of boredom, and with those types of tasks I prefer total isolation. For mundane or common tasks? sure, I like to multi those when possible. With work though, I often have to pay attention to small details in very large documents and whatnot, and I can't afford to be distracted. Also, since I work from home, I'm expected to be quickly "available" if needed…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 09:33 PM
2

I have no idea why you are romanticizing this era, it sucked. Romanticizing?! I don't think it was grand at all, it sucked as you said. But it was also natural, and fairly efficient at culling the weak. But back to my original point, Natural Selection is absolutely at play in the first world. OK as I said before, I'll "give" on this. However, my RP self still maintains that all this "civility" is a farce of human intelligence, because the moment we lose our safety nets, we'll be looking an awful…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 09:28 PM
2

You know the saying about all chiefs and no Indians? I think the same would apply to all Alphas and no betas.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 09:22 PM
7

They don't have dreams or aspirations of working a fancy job? I don't. My ideal life would be to have enough money to piss away my hours on whatever hobby or interest I cared to pursue. I could give a rats ass if I produce anything of use to society, but I need a paycheck to survive. And the real issue for me is: most of my interests are in no way profitable from a "make a living at it" standpoint. Unless of course I write a song that becomes a top 40 hit, and even then I wouldn't call that a re…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 09:21 PM
5

Which was, on the one hand flattering (and sexy), but on the other hand, quite unsettling, since I knew that their feelings had no real basis. So that meant that I was often uncomfortable with the situation, since they honestly didn't really know me enough to justify those feelings and so were just projecting. This exactly. I have to question in that moment, if the woman sitting next to me is insane or or lying, because there is NO WAY they know me well enough to feel real 'comfort' so soon. But…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 09:15 PM
2

You don't have to. Most of them can't afford it anyway. Although, the local community college is certainly hopping these days. Not sure a degree from there will do much, but if it lands them something better than a cashier gig, more power to them. There are also a LOT of kids in my boys senior class signing up for the military. Many of them see it as their only shot to get out of here, and I sincerely hope every one of them uses the college money they'll be granted. I find it both encouraging an…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 09:04 PM
2

So RP found you? That's actually kinda rare, as just about every RP man I've talked to one on one found it because they were looking for answers. I imagine your initial PoV may have been a bit different than the average RP noob. If you don't mind me asking, since you weren't seeking it directly, did you find that RP still caused the anger phase? I was already in a bad mental state when I wandered in, so I was already well on my way to anger without the 'sphere. I've wondered how much of that ang…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 08:57 PM
2

Of course I have no proof, but I'd hazard a guess we'd be missing a WHOLE LOT of detailed science through the centuries. Think of all the people in history that completely shut themselves in and dedicated their lives to some science type thing. I suspect many were introvert/sperg types. Who the hell else would do something that crazy? Of course, the folks that don't really like "people" that much to begin with.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 08:42 PM
2

I like you systematizers, it's fascinating to watch your minds work. You have no idea how much I'd see that as a genuine compliment if it was directed at me. In fact? that may be one of the few "compliments" anyone could ever give me that wouldn't embarrass me at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 08:33 PM
1

but part of the system of relationships is to not systemize everything. So I'm not the only RP guy that has to kinda "plan" being spontaneous?! As in: I have to remind myself its necessary.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 08:24 PM
1

Yes sir. I first found MMSL, and from there the rest of the 'sphere. Mind you, this was back in 2011, so MMSL was a different beast. Damn, I just tried that same search now, and I didn't even hit GoodMenProject until page 2! And that's hardly even a 'sphere site at all. I guess ILYBINILWY has gone mainstream! I'm on page 4 of Google search and still looking at stuff less than a few years old. Oh wait! Didn't I just see somewhere that MMSL has closed its forums? That search took me straight to a …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 08:17 PM
4

I've said for many years: the reason America has a fat problem is our food sucks. It costs WAY too much to eat properly, and as such most people's diets here are horrible. I'd love to eat better, but with five people to feed, shopping at Whole Foods for better quality really isn't an option. Instead we do our best to pick the healthiest "shit" we can. For the most part? We just try to avoid boxed stuff if/when at all possible. At least that way we can somewhat control our salt intake.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 08:10 PM
5

It's pretty much all good. Oh HELL no! There are far more absolutely gross candies to me than good ones. In fact, I'm actually not a fan of sweets in general. My issue is carbs. I LOVE carbs. Noodles. Bread. I could live the rest of my life without a Twix, but not without my carbs. Well, in fact, I'd probably live a better life without both.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 08:06 PM
2

something along those lines, yeah. Although Atlas has me wondering about MBTI again on this one.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 07:58 PM
1

I'm on marriage #2. Got hitched post RP. Yeah, I know that makes me a two time loser to many in the 'sphere. shrug. I'm thick headed.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 07:56 PM
1

The person I dated (and we were very young so I'm sure maturity was part of it) had a really hard time just giving a short answer. Guilty as charged. It took me time to calm the hell down about my inclination for over explanations. everything thought they have has to pass through several mental filters. like fact checks. I find that a very good description! And yes, it makes mundane chit chat very painful, for both people involved. I"m actually a bit of a weather nut. Do you have ANY idea how ha…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 07:53 PM
1

I can remember it well and the feeling was great, but now it has been replaced by: "you have to set boundaries, shitlord, we don't live in a Disney world, nobody loves a push-over". Ok then. They are right. Uncheck "devoted". Amen! Can I get a hallelujah?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 07:46 PM
1

I prefer not socializing, but I can enjoy parties too (until I run out of social juice). I've actually made progress in figuring out how to make my tank of "social juice" last longer as I get older. Other than that, I can say I am confident enough now to fit into just about any social situation. However, how long that social juice lasts these days is a direct reflection of how much effort it takes me to do so in any given circumstance. So the more "stressful" the situation is on my social routin…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 07:40 PM
7

but intimacy would be a struggle. I think finding common ground is the larger issue here, as well as the patience level of the "normie" in the couple. The more comfortable I get with someone, the less "oddities" come out of my mouth, if that makes sense. I mean, after telling my wife what my favorite candy bar is a hundred times, she knows what it is, and not to ask unless she wants the full rundown again. And more to the point? She'll tell me up front if she's looking for a quick answer, or the…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 07:31 PM
3

Do you know me in real life? :P To me, NOTHING just "naturally happens", there is a reason for everything. I know my favorite candy bar is Twix. But it's taken 46 years of painstaking research to find this answer. Lord help me if someone makes a better candy bar, it may take me another 46 to change my mind officially. All that is to say: I realize I'm no picnic to live with, and not every woman's cup of tea, to say the least.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 07:25 PM
4

Nope old geezer (by PPD standards for sure) I didn't find the 'sphere until I was 38, right after my now ex said, and I quote: "I love you but I'm not in love with you" and walked out the door. So I went looking for answers, and that phrase alone in a search bar landed me in the 'sphere.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 07:22 PM
3

Damn I find this stuff fascinating.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 07:19 PM
1

Guess I can add "systematizer" to my list of cool acronyms. I'm a little sad at how much I enjoy these kinds of tests.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 07:16 PM
3

I thought so. I really don't care. At 46, even if I am on the spectrum legit, what difference does it make? I've figured out how to get around and/or fix the issues (I hope) so having an official "name" to put on the condition seems pointless.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:57 PM
2

I really think a lot of incels fall on the spectrum though, I think many/most incels don't fall on the spectrum, they are damn near the high mark for still able to function. Not a dig, I just think they are about as extreme as one can get and still lead a "mostly" normal life. What I don't know is: can they be helped down from that ledge at all?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:51 PM
2

Yeah I completely agree with that. And I don't take sperg comments any more seriously than I do Polish jokes, so I don't take offense. The world wouldn't be what it is today without us 'spergs', but the normies are loath to admit it.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:48 PM
1

I'm a lot more balanced these days, but I don't think I'll ever stop hanging laundry instead of drying it. HOLY FLASHBACK! I just pictured my grandmothers basement, in the dead of winter, with rope strung everywhere for clothes to dry on. She had a dryer, but that costs money. Air was free!
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:46 PM
4

LOL just saw your comment. Another INTJ here scoring a 31. Any confirmed BP INTJ's around want to take a crack at this? for science!
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:44 PM
7

ROFL I scored a 31. I read somewhere that INTJ types often score high on the spectrum, and that personality type is over-represented on the spectrum, so maybe correlation. According to the page though, I'm 86% likely to be diagnosed, however I believe Asperger is no longer a "thing", right?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:43 PM
3

this was like 20 years ago I have you beat! I graduated HS in '88.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:36 PM
1

Mostly? Our house is three stories tall. If I fall, I probably won't die, but I'll wish I did. So yeah, its likely I'm going to hire that out. I only even considered it because a good friend of mine used to have a roofing business, and still has some of the necessary equipment. (the scariest of which? The multi-levels of scaffolding required to even reach our roof. There is NO ACCESS through any window directly, you'd have to climb up from the highest one to even touch the peak.) Think old mill …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:33 PM
1

I'm literally as we speak waffling on hiring someone to do our roof, or gathering my buddies that know how to do it and get it done. My working class roots cries out to save those pennies, but I'm old and not a fan of heights. In this case, my roots will probably lose. But to your point? I still do everything I possible can rather than pay someone to do it, in some cases, even if paying someone would get it done faster or better. Hell, I still have to bite my tongue when one of our kids doesn't …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:21 PM
5

My Dad told me that all people act in their own self interest and if they don't then they are fools. it would have been awesome for someone to bluntly point that out to me as a youth.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:16 PM
2

Laws and society aren't against Natural Selection, though they may seem to be on the surface, they are in fact one of Human kinds greatest advantages from an evolutionary perspective. I'll admit, I see merit in your points above. (not that you needed my confirmation LOL, just saying I see your point). However, I'm still not 100% sure on the quote above. I'm sorry, but there is nothing "natural" about our ability to communicate around the globe based on our technology. that tech may be an extensi…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:12 PM
1

I tell him all the time that I need him. He knows that I don't, in the most basic sense of the word - I wouldn't die without him, just as he wouldn't die without me - but my life would be significantly less pleasant and enjoyable without him. I guess you don't think its too much to ask either. I'm not at all surprised. ;-) My wife lived on a 40+ acre farm in New Hampshire with her ex. They raised pigs and cows for slaughter, and she helped her ex to all the necessary work involved right up to dr…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:06 PM
3

You have some kind of barbaric free-for-all fantasy playing in your head regarding the idea of Natural Selection. Not exactly. More like small tribes that were peaceful internally, but warred externally. I believe humans are perfectly adapted to tribal life, but we've blown that way out of proportion. The US of A is not my "tribe", people that think and believe as I do are, and its easy to see there is a lot of divide in the US today. I can and do peacefully co-exist with everyone, but don't thi…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 05:58 PM
2

So what difference does it make? In my case, I also was the last male with my surname, and I certainly felt a responsibility to pass that on as well. And sure, in a few generations my contribution will be watered down and lost, but as long as part if it exists, technically my DNA is still in the game. At some point everything dies, so I suppose the "winners" make it to the last day. Further? I doubt you had much contribution into how your cousin was raised. You DO however get to choose how your …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 05:29 PM
2

Natural Selection /= Wild Kingdom Please explain. Natural selection, as I understand it, is the "law of the jungle". We don't live in the jungle. Sure, you could say anything humans do is "natural" since humans are natural beings, but that's tossing aside a whole lot of UNnatural influences in my opinion. Our "natural" state is how we behave in the jungle. How we behave in the modern world is at best a patch over that basic programming. take away our comfortable lifestyle, and we'd be back to ra…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 05:20 PM
1

Working from home is awesome, but it doesn't necessarily mean I can multitask. I mean, I multitask PPD all day, but I can't leave my work computer for any length of time if I'm "on the clock" so being home doesn't allow me any more freedom to start dinner early, unless its as simple as turn on the crock pot, which some evenings we do. What WFH actually gives me is more time with my family in the off hours, because its cut out 2 hours of commute time for me, and of course I save money on gas and …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 05:15 PM
1

Anyway, it sounds to me that you find sex equivalent to relationships. If by relationships you mean LTR/marriage? Yeah, I find them to be one in the same. Sure, I don't NEED sex to survive, but I'm not interested in a LTR/marriage without it, and don't see why I'd torture myself with it. If I'm in a LTR or married, I'm expecting sex to be a mainstay of that relationship. And in fact, its one of the primary ways I express love and affection within such a relationship, so going without it is negle…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 05:09 PM
2

To this very day , I can NOT motivate myself to exercise by telling myself it'll make me hotter. It just doesn't work. I have to remind myself every damn time that if I don't, I'm going to get cranky. I can feel it now when I slack off in my attitude, and I am NOT working out hard, at all. As much as I logically understand being in better shape makes me more attractive, which gets me laid, its still not enough to actually get me off my ass. Like I said elsewhere, I have to find ways to motivate …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 04:57 PM
2

Although I completely understand that, you can't deny that its common for any indication that a woman NEEDS a man to be shouted down with vigor. And I agree, I think the "fix" is to teach men and women that its OK to depend on each other in certain contexts, and actually perfectly normal and expected. There is far too much emphasis put on "fierce and independent" and not nearly enough on "LTRs are a team sport, not a one on one competition". My wife needs my paycheck, but so do I. However, I fee…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 04:52 PM
5

Yep, I tried to point that out elsewhere but was accused of being "extreme" because I mentioned that this market is artificially controlled, because men can't just rape and pillage, which IS a valid sexual strategy in a truly open sexual market. As is killing your sexual competition, which we aren't permitted to do today.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 04:37 PM
1

Well if a guy has a good enough personality and is good looking enough it kind of makes sense to go down that road Which is a pretty good indication I've got a good candidate. I just had to get over my aversion to leading on with FWB, or allowing that thought to linger while I figure out my end of it all. Seems a bit nefarious to me, but if I'm not the one promoting it, its not my fault she got that idea. It IS however my responsibility to set that straight before we cross the boundary where it …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 04:36 PM
1

Personality only matters on a superficial level at that point. Two weeks in, she may be able to tell I'm not a serial killer, but she has a LONG way to go before she truly "knows" me. All she's seen at that point is the positive stuff. At best, she has a rough idea of "who I am" at that point, so I find it hard to qualify as "personality matters". Its more like "he doesn't have any glaring personality issues that are a deal breaker. Yet." They don't get to dig deeper until I know they are intere…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 04:26 PM
1

Essentially yes. Like I said, I want to know I'm "hot enough" to bang without having to offer commitment in exchange. Once I know she has that level of attraction, I'm actually happy to offer all the rest, and in fact want to do so. It just goes against my natural inclination to NOT push the LTR angle from the gate, because that IS what I'm actually after.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 04:12 PM
2

They've just convinced you the strange taste and occasional gagging sensations are normal. I stopped gagging on it a year or so ago. Now I enjoy the taste. :P In the days before pop-psych somehow we managed. In the days before evo-psych, most men worked hard labor jobs, and that kind of exercise goes a long way towards curbing anger and aggression. Another reason RP suggest lifting heavy things, it helps with anger and rage. At least it did for me. And in fact? RP made me discover why I need to …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 04:09 PM
2

TRP sets men up to fail... RP is baptism by fire. Realize most people burn up using that method, but those that pull through are generally much stronger for it. Its expected that many/most will fail from the gate.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 04:05 PM
2

How do you expect people to "get over" being angry if they never get to vent it all out? FFS, the first step for me was to victim puke all over the 'sphere, which promptly got me my virtual ass handed to me, which got me looking closer at what I could do to fix my problems. If I hadn't vented all that shit out, I might still be choking on it today.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 03:59 PM
2

NO clue about the photosynthesis comment, but rubbing one out only takes the edge off for awhile. It really doesn't get rid of the issue entirely, like ever. To me its equivalent to drinking yourself silly to numb mental anguish. Sure, while your drunk you don't care your life sucks, but eventually when you sober up, it'll still suck and you'll be hung over.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 03:55 PM
2

The SMP version of mutually assured destruction. that damn decline again.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 03:50 PM
1

Even most fwb and ons come from someone they know at least a bit already Well I am using the FWB metric, because I'm not willing to actually have a ONS, and I don't like to bluff. So sure, I expect it to take a few weeks to figure out, depending on how much time we spend together early on. That being said, if it takes more than a few dates/weeks to see interest, I'm out for sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 03:40 PM
5

I think my HS experience was slightly different because I went to HS a long time ago, AND our HS had a very serious class split between the MC kids and those of us from the town next door: the poor white kids forced to school with snobby not-really-rich-enough-to-boast-but-do-anyway kids. And, those dudes LOVED to pump and dump the poor girls. And of course, the poor girls fell for it every time, or at least figured they'd get their shot at the golden ring, but there was no chance they were goin…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 02:59 PM
2

People with lower income then. Money shields you from the shittiness of life. Now you're starting to see things from my PoV. But as it stands, low income folks are taking it on the chin now, and they'll probably keep taking it on the chin no matter what changes come. Because nobody cares about low income folks and their problems. At least until those folks get angry and violent, then all of a sudden they are EVIL. Everyone is fine with it as long as the poor shut the hell up about being stuck wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 02:49 PM
2

I don't believe in this supply and demand bullshit because any economy can be manipulated at any ends. I don't think anyone denies a market can be "manipulated", I think many feel that isn't the best course of action.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 02:38 PM
1

The women who complain don't mind the low n conservative guy who wants a low n conservative woman. Right, but the knee jerk reaction to ANY man saying they prefer a lower N GF/LTR mate is HYPOCRITE! I have no proof, but I'd wager there are far more lower N men looking for lower N women than high N men complaining lower N women won't marry them. Call it an educated guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 02:30 PM
0

I need to care about someone before I have sex with them and one of my prerequisites is that they have the same standard. It was surprising to me to learn that most people don't work this way, and its far more common for most folks to simply view sex as bumping uglies. To many, sex is simply sport, or entertainment.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 01:50 PM
1

It has zero to do with their "families", because I'm fairly sure children still need someone to "provide" for them. Its their GF/Wives that we are discussing here, and those men would need to first get a GF before any chance of family can be discussed. What are those men supposed to be to those women, if not a secure provider? Remember, they want to be needed, so an 'egalitarian' marriage won't appeal to them. So there's the dilemma. Women by and large have declared loud and clear that they don'…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 01:17 PM
8

I am a modern minded man! :P
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 01:09 PM
1

That only works if what you are "drawn to" can also make a decent amount of money to survive on. I don't suspect there are many men that dream of digging holes one day, but we still need those holes to be dug. It would be great if we could all just DO what we enjoy. I know very few people with that luxury when it comes to making a living. Most DO what makes them the biggest paycheck, not work that fulfills their spirit and mind.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 01:07 PM
2

Working class peers mostly. I'm 46, so I'd be looking at blue collar women in their 30's. Many/most with minimal education, some college but not many actual degrees. Mostly teachers (the ones that got a degree!), retail, service, and low end medical jobs, not so much careers in the classic sense. Not directly from the trailer park types though. I prefer they grew up in a house without wheels.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 09:30 AM
2

Please. Her "taking care of me" is minimal outside of the bedroom, mostly because I put in effort around the house just as she does. Can it be done with two career parents? Sure! You want to clean house in the evenings after dinner and before bed, or over the weekend instead of enjoying your days off? Who's gonna pick the kids up at 3:30 from ROTC, get them fed, and then drop 2 of 3 off to band practice by 5:30pm if we both work u til 5? You don't seem to understand the complexity of having thre…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 09:19 AM
2

Simple. Overall I make more than the women I'm attracted to. Plus, those women aren't the types to look positively on a man without a job, unless he hit the lottery maybe. My wife is a Medical Assistant. She will never in her entire life make what I do right now. Ever. At best? We can do with less income once the kids are out. I doubt I'd be happy with the standard of living that would require, but time will tell. I don't come from the MC, and it's not common for couples I know to have equal inc…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 09:08 AM
2

Interesting. So because I see my marriage more as Yin/Yang instead of 50/50 I'm a unicorn? Because THAT is what I mean when I say balance in a marriage. Not equal income, or even equal say. Yin and Yang. My wife balances me, and I balance her. None of it has to do with our pay checks. She softens my hard edges, and I shore up her weak spots. Nothing equal about it, but it does balance out.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 09:00 AM
3

My DNA does't care about population issues. The only goal is to pass the material on to the next generation. Literally if you don't have children, you've lost the biology game. Maybe you don't care, and that's fine, but I've done my duty to my family and my lineage by passing our DNA on. I've accomplished my biological purpose, so from here on life is whatever I make of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 08:57 AM
1

OK so honest question: if we both agree that men in general want to be needed, but Western woman don't need them, how do you think that'll turn out? I don't think the desire to be needed is easily trained out of men, so without a way to be needed don't you suspect many might get restless?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 08:51 AM
3

IN what reality is my wife's ability to tend to our children inferiority? That's primarily what I want a wife for in the first place. Sure an income is helpful, but again I want a wife, not a revenue stream.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 08:48 AM
2

Well considering the "natural order" means rape is a valid sexual strategy, you can't claim what we have today is anything close to natural selection. The current SMP is nowhere near a "natural" state of existence unless I can use whatever force I deem necessary against my rivals and/or rape without legal repercussions. Freeing entitled women to chose men on whatever criteria they want without allowing men to use their own natural advantages isn't natural selection at all. Not even fucking close…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 08:45 AM
2

So? We still need holes dug, wars fought, houses cleaned, and babies born. Men can't do much on the last one, so sorry ladies, that's on you. I don't like spending 8 hours a day working for someone else, but I do it because my family depends on me. I'm not asking a woman to be my wife and be any more happy about the "work" involved than I am thrilled about my work. I'm asking a woman to understand I need her contributions to our marriage and family to be different from mine, because I can't do i…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 08:36 AM
3

Not at all. I don't require my wife wear high heels while cooking dinner. I'm very evolved and enlightened for a man!
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 08:29 AM
2

Natural selection you say? Sweet lets dispense with all this legal shit about murder and get down to naturally selecting winners. Until the law is no longer keeping us in line, stick natural selection where the sun don't shine. Nothing natural about the long arm of the law stopping the law of the jungle.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 08:25 AM
7

I don't want to suspend my disbelief. I want genuine desire. No escort can provide that, unless they give me a freebie perhaps. Prostitution will not help men looking for genuine desire. It will help men that just want to bust a nut though so I'm for legal and safe sex work.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 08:19 AM
5

What's the point of life if you can't follow your dreams? The point of life is to procreate and make more life. Your individual happiness Is irrelevant to biology. i mean, it wasn't so long ago the point of life was just to survive. How entitled we all are to assume it's about chasing our dreams. That is pure luxury.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 08:14 AM
4

Plus you need money to buy your family all organic and antibiotic free foods. ROFL. We do most of our grocery shopping at Walmart. I suppose it's still "organic" food, but I suspect that's not what you meant. Antibiotic free foods? Sounds like a gimmick to charge me more for a chicken. I like chicken because it's cheap protein and versatile.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 08:06 AM
1

And a world of women and Chads will function how exactly? Who's gonna fix the robot that fixes the robot that builds you new cars? The decline is everywhere. I can get all fire and brimstone if you want. The Catholics taught me well. I may have left the Church, but I never tossed aside the morality. So I'm sure you understand my PoV on the "decline". I don't just mean in dating realms, I mean the West is going to hell in a hand basket. And no, I don't think thumping bibles or bringing back the 5…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 07:53 AM
1

I would say emphatically so, wouldn't you? Maybe? We weren't MC, and to me work has always simply been a means to an end. The same with education. I derive no sense of status from my career, but I like the paycheck. Same with my degree. I'm not proud of it at all, it was necessary to get into management, so a means to an end. I simply don't understand why a woman would feel embarrassed because her husband makes enough to support two people AND children. If I could be a SAHD without economic dure…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 07:39 AM
3

It is literally a primary concern for me. I can't pick up and leave if the school nurse calls, so my wife needs to be able to leave work to pick them up. Or get them too/from doctors appointments. I jump into the fray past 5pm, but before that I'm unavailable for taxi duty. We have three teens, someone needs to be available. So a career woman wouldn't be able to fill in as required for obvious reasons. Do the men you're attracted to not want children? Or haven't they considered who will do what …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 07:29 AM
1

I learned to be more social. Sucked it up because I wanted more income. At this point I've managed a full-time work from home gig. It's ideal for an introvert like me, other than having to spend a lot of time on conference calls. But some days, I don't get out of my jammies until noon! (Only on days with no video calls scheduled. LOL)
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 07:21 AM
1

I'm a social Luddite because I don't see all this as "progress"? I mostly see moral decay and decline, and no I'm not particularly thrilled about it. And please do tell: what's wrong with wanting to be needed? Why is it so evil of men to want women to need them?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 07:16 AM
1

Yep understood. I never considered the class angle when it comes to income, because I always assumed I'd be with a working class woman, so our actual individual income wouldn't be that important. Is it assumed when one SO makes substantially more than the other there is also a class difference? I could easily see that as an issue, but where would that kind of class mixing even occur? Where are working class women getting hitched to UMC men that sets off an imbalance? If it's really about class, …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 07:08 AM
1

Hobby or work related? I work with DBAs often on my projects. Usually very efficient and logical thinkers. Sometimes a little short on pleasantries, but I'm good with that myself. I most enjoyed the years I worked second shift in the data center 3-11pm shift. I worked with one other guy, he monitored the network, I babysat the severs. Minimal contact with people, maximum chance to play with cool toys. And as long as things went well, the job was cake. However, I earned my pay those few times shi…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:57 AM
1

Other than income yeah we are "the same". But that's why I asked how an income des parity would cause issue. In our case, it's allowing us to get our kids out of high school and then hopefully we can do more of what we want with it. Or, I may quit the IT thing and do something more rewarding with less income, assuming we'll need much less to survive on without three extra people to support. If possible, I'd really love to get out of the corporate world entirely. It's killing my mellow. LOL. She'…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:46 AM
1

Anti-social and materialistic? Are you a DBA? If so, Oracle or SQL?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:36 AM
2

Ahhhh I see what you mean! In our case, I think we are fairly evenly matched looks wise, and adjusted for age. (I have 8 years on her and my white chin hair is showing it LOL) Income wise, I make more as I said. status wise? Well I'm technically higher status than her in a general sense (which is laughable but I'm full time salaried lower management, and she's hourly clinical help) but she works with orthopedic surgeons all day, so my status in that regard is null and void. Good thing my work st…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:21 AM
2

There are no garaunties in life, other than you will eventually die. Believe me, I understand the desire for control, but it's mostly an illusion. By all means make plans, but be prepared for them to be broken. Spectacularly in most cases.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:14 AM
5

I couldn't afford all that on what I make now if I was single and had no children. You're talking about concern over things I don't even consider. At this point, post divorce and remarried, I'm trying to save like mad to have a comfortable retirement. I only managed to get a college degree at all because I found an employer that paid for it. You are talking way above my pay grade here. Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:10 AM
2

I have children, and I'm not rich, so those options aren't viable for me. I'm really not so concerned for myself at this point. I'm old enough I can probably manage to keep a decent bubble of happiness and contentment around me until I die or go senile. But my kids have to make their way through all this shit, and that sucks.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:07 AM
1

I don't think income disparities between a couple matter in the least of all income is treated as shared. I think economic status matters in that the man's should ideally be higher, and physical attractiveness is probably ideal at equal, but that rarely happens. I make almost double what my wife does. I'm salaried and she's hourly. So far since we've met I've increased our income divide several times, and we're still going strong. Why would this situation cause us issue?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 06:04 AM
3

I could "handle" it, but it would make her and I miserable in the process. Why put her or I through that misery? I want a wife with minimal work obligations over one that makes bank. I value her ability to contribute to the family more than I desire more money to spend. Handle that.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 05:57 AM
4

That's not always simple. I make more than my "class" peers, so by default my pool of perspectives tends to be poorer. No, I'm not looking to move up the social ladder. I like my people, but I wanted more money. I have no desire to try and pair off with one of my income level peers or co-workers because we don't run in the same circles or share similar interests at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 05:52 AM
2

Evolve or die. Sounds like you are part of the "enjoy the decline" crowd. Hope you enjoy the show, it should be entertaining.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 05:47 AM
5

Career women in general have less time to contribute to family life. Why would I want to marry someone that has to put as much or more effort into their career as I am? We can't both kick ass at the office while no one takes care of things at home. I'm dependent on my wife's work flexibility to get our kids taken care of when sick. Sure she makes less for that flexibility, but it allows me to make more because I don't need it myself. We can't both be locked in 9-5, so I value that she can take t…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 05:43 AM
1

What if his idea of relationship balance has nothing to do with who makes more money?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 05:38 AM
1

Yeah it's becoming a real pain in the ass. Where have all the good women gone?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 05:37 AM
1

Her ONS didn't have to be Mr. Personality, why do I need to start there? That is exactly my point. I want to be the ONS that's too good to let go, or as absolutely close to that mark as I can get. So pass the attraction threshold first, then all the Personality comes into play. If I don't pass the hotness up front, I'm not interested. Might seem extreme, but if she was willing to FWB me up, I can be fairly sure I'm not just "hot enough" since I wasn't offering her more. Once I pass that bar thou…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 05:32 AM
3

All RP men aren't part of a hive mind. There are MRP, PUA, MG... You know the list. We all aren't concerns about the same things even though we agree on core principles. Example: I worry about divorce rape because I'm the type of guy that's a prime target for poor gold digger types, and I am marriage minded. If I was the player brand of RP collecting notches, why would I worry about divorce rape? I'm not getting married. And my advice to my LTR minded self would be? Don't get married! I'd think …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 05:17 AM
1

personality goes a long way for women. That's falling into "hot enough" territory in my book. I know several women here have said it takes them time to be attracted to a guy, and while that may be true, it's not what I look for. If I'm not hot enough to pass her ONS/FWB threshold from the gate, I'm not interested in trying to grow on her at all. And before you say "all women don't have ONS" I'll tell you in my age bracket, I'd bet money any woman I'm interested in has at least once or twice. Hel…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 05:11 AM
3

I'm comfortable associating with career oriented women. I'm comfortable being friends with them. No chance in hell I'd marry one of them. Not because they are awful women, but because I want a wife, not a business partner. A career implies to me she won't have the time and/or dedication to fill the wife role to my satisfaction. Not to say I don't expect my wife to work since we don't have young children, but that work needs to be time flexible, not too stressful, and not distracting. (That is do…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 05:01 AM
1

I don't think that's how women with better options think. If a woman is already having to "settle" on looks at all, she's running out of options. Put another way: if a man lives in an area where there are a lot of women desperate to get any advantage they can, and he has the means to provide, it gets damned difficult to figure out what her real motivations are. I'm sure there's less likelihood of this if the woman in question isn't desperate, (read financially self sufficient) but none of my for…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 04:52 AM
5

You know I agree that most men want relationships. I'm simply stating that from an RP perspective, that's a weakness, not a virtue. So the advice to never get married goes hand in hand with the rest. And if followed, it doesn't matter if RP makes one a shitty husband. Raw RP isn't geared towards life-long monogamy. Why would it help men be better husbands? Divorce is clearly an issue. Not getting married is a fix.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 04:31 AM
2

The ugly woman is probably very eager to please. The wife? Probably not so much.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 04:20 AM
3

Not too much support of marriage in the 'sphere. She can't divorce you if you never get married.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 04:09 AM
2

Somewhat sexually attracted, sure. But I don't want to be the "winner" because I'm the hottest guy she could get to commit. And that is the issue for LTR minded men: we have to figure out if she thinks we're hot, or hot enough. I'm not interested in being the hot enough guy, But I am only looking for LTRs. I'm sure you can see the dilemma.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 03:10 AM
3

The fact is many "betas" will still offer her commitment. Hence RP shouting "buyer beware!" Or actually, don't buy at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/16 02:55 AM
1

If dead inside is what you're aiming for? Sure. For now at least, I'd rather feel good about myself and my choices more than fit anyone else's idea of who I should be. Perhaps that's easy for me to say because right now its working out, but I kinda took the "change for others" route early on and it landed me in misery. Can't say I won't end up miserable again someday, but at least this time I'll get their by my own reckoning.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/16 09:04 PM
2

ROFLMAO! Had to be Pittsburgh. :P
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/16 08:18 PM
1

Well, I'll give you an example. I was lifting weights and working out a lot at one point, because I wanted to, and it felt good. OK so stop right there. Don't worry about the fact that it ALSO gets you more attention from women. If you lift because it makes you feel good, do it! Don't let how others respond to it keep you from doing it. Its not for them, its for you. Piano?! I've been playing keys since I turned 13, and never once in my entire life did I ever consider that it was attractive to w…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/16 07:52 PM
2

I've gotten women from "changing" and it didn't feel fulfilling. Because it isn't fulfilling. Like at all to me. That's why I'm a fan of just being the man I want to be, and then look at female companionship. And for me this was all kinda parallel which makes it harder to explain. Changing for anyone OTHER than yourself is usually doomed to failure. YOU have to want to be the "new you", or it'll never work. You will either fail, or find the entire process unfulfilling in my estimation, and it so…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/16 05:56 PM
2

That at least used to be the RP I advocate for. I know brother, I know...
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/16 05:49 PM
11

Men have to be with women who don't offer them what they want all the time, because they don't have a choice. Not true. Men are with those women because those women have vaginas, and those men want that vagina more than their own happiness. I've been there myself, and its miserable. Issue is, women are not transparent about what they want. No they really aren't. That's where RP can help. Or, my personal advice? Decide what kind of man you want to be, then become that. THEN take a look around and…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/16 05:38 PM
9

If you become more "Chad-like", is that not you the "real you" at that point? It sounds to me like you are upset because "women" don't value things about you that you think they should. I can understand that, but you do NOT get to choose what anyone values about you. If you want a GF/Wife/Plate/ONS, you have to offer those women what they want, whether you like it or not. Why would any woman want to be with a man that does NOT offer what they want?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/16 05:20 PM
2

I can see how some people see it as "different" because instead of computers we are discussing people, but I'll admit as far as processing info goes, I don't see it any differently at all. It is info to be processed and evaluated on usefulness, that's all. Now pushing through LMR is one of those RP things I take issue with, but that's my personal decision. I'm mostly of the mind that any indication a woman isn't interested is more than enough to move on, but I'm looking for quality over quantity…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/16 05:07 PM
3

You're kidding, right? Man I work in IT, we have an acronym for everything, and in many cases the same one may stand for different things in different situations. For some people (like myself I guess) that shit just works. It allows me to have detailed conversations with other techies without having to use full names of things and/or extra long complicated explanations. I can say SAN and they'll just know I mean Storage Area Network and that I'm talking about remote storage without having to say…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/16 04:51 PM
4

not you spergs, I know you thought Disney was real If I had feelings they'd be hurt. :P
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/16 04:41 PM
1

If you don't have issues with smoking, don't pick up a vape. There's really no point in getting yourself hooked on the Nic, and even less point puffing on zero nic juice. (although I know people that do it.) However I now know at least 7 people that were heavy smokers that have completely kicked cigarettes using a vape, and like I said that's an improvement. Best part? Instead of walking around smelling like an ashtray, I'm currently spreading Vanilla Bean smell everywhere I go.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/16 01:22 PM
1

I actually enjoy the act of smoking, even without inhale like cigars. I smoked cigarettes for years, but have been vaping for the past 3 with no intention of quitting entirely. I like the taste and feel of the smoke on my tongue, and adding alcohol into the mix increases the complexity of the flavor. I also enjoy whiskey infused with smoke for the same reason. All that said, I vape because I run on nicotine and caffeine. I've cut down to 3 nic juice though, so my overall level of nicotine is far…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/16 08:13 PM
3

As a general rule of thumb: the darker the cigar, the stronger it tastes. Excluding the oddballs like Iguana brand that are green. Personally I tend to like a milder cigar with whiskey, but your mileage will vary. More robust cigars tend to overpower the whiskey to my pallet, but I have friends that swear by a dark stink stick with theirs. Sounds to me like an excuse to drink whiskey, for science!
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/16 08:01 PM
3

Yeah sometimes it is a blame shift tactic. I'm not going there necessarily, but I am pointing out that women by and large "choose" what the next generation is "built" from by getting pregnant. So it makes sense that their choices in mate selection probably carry more weight than a man's. They literally choose which men get to contribute to the next generation biologically. It's actually a huge responsibility many women seem desperate to get rid of.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/16 07:13 PM
3

Try a good cigar! Much better than a cigarette.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/16 07:07 PM
7

I don't assume it's intentional, but you have to see how female selection drives the species. If women all over the world stopped having sex with blue eyed men, blue eyes would evenutally disappear. Extrapolate that out and it's a simple thing to see how women mostly mold humanity, certainly in regards to who they allow to impregnate them.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/16 07:01 PM
1

Or the assumption that all girls go after that type, which is strong in RP, and something we both know is inaccurate. It doesn't matter if its "inaccurate" as long as its "accurate" for enough women. I know many folks want to focus on the ALL in AWALT, but a man doesn't literally have to be attractive to ALL WOMEN to have more than enough interest to last him a lifetime. You are making chad sound like a barbie doll. A blank slate you put whatever you want on. Not exactly. He's a template if you …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 08:23 PM
1

So i think we're down to the core of TRP: A system, albeit shortsighted and convoluted, composed of self improvement and strateglc tips, designed by men to get gratification from women. I think what you outlined above is just the hook. If you really dive deeply into RP, past the surface, its about self improvement, self reflection, and self awareness. But I can't say much of that shows up online these days. I originally wanted RP to tell me the secret to finding and keeping a happy relationship,…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 08:13 PM
1

Using it to better yourself is one thing, using it to push blame on to guys that do a bit better tham you is not. I agree that "Chad" as an ideal can be helpful, but that doesn't necessarily mean that "Chad" can't also be despised at the same time. From my PoV, "Chad" may very well make a habit out of sexing up married women. "Chad" may be a thug. Or, "Chad" could be a truly awesome guy with good looks and a personality to match. Aspiring to be more like "awesome Chad" seems like a worthy goal, …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 08:02 PM
2

Makes perfect sense to me. My advice to men? Do everything in their power to NOT be "settled" on. Barring that, either go without relationships or figure out how to be good with being a consolation prize.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 07:48 PM
1

Between you and me (and all of PPD) I really don't care what other RP men think of "Chad". I only need the place holder of "Chad" to scope out where I sit on the hierarchy. If that means being the "hottest" man in the Brony crowd, I'd be a Brony Chad. And for me personally, its not even the goal I'm attempting to reach. I just need to know who "Chad" is in my niche, and be as close to that as I can muster. Again, I'm not looking for notches, so I don't need 25 Brony chics to jump in my lap, I'm …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 07:40 PM
1

As Satchell Paige said: it ain't bragging if you can do it. LOL. I actually disagree with that sentiment, and had to learn to brag a little more for my own benefit. I sincerely hate bragging, or for that matter even being told by others what I good job I'm doing. Needless to say my yearly review with the boss is an uncomfortable hour for me, mostly because I'm good at my job. I am the type of person that would be fully content NEVER being told by my boss that I'm great. Just give me a raise and …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 07:31 PM
5

most women compromise on attraction to get commitment (AF/BB). Therefore shit-testing is more common than you think I'd say shit testing is more common when the woman "settled" on raw attraction in order to be married for sure. I'd also state that shit testing is probably more common in marriages where the man "let himself go" either physically or mentally, and is not necessarily tied to whether or not she ALSO "let herself go" mentally or physically. In other words: if she isn't 100% satisfied …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 07:24 PM
3

It still doesn't come naturally to me, but I can fake it well enough most of the time. I made it a personal game when I first started. I'd force myself to keep eye contact for X amount of seconds. Once I managed that regularly, I increased X until keeping count was distracting me from the actual conversation, and by then I'd managed to look much less creepy. And I'm sure that SOUNDS awfully creepy, but the only thing that matters in that context is what others see, not what it takes to show it.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 07:12 PM
3

Women aren't "shit testing"(I'll use that word very loosely) men they find attractive. No shit?! They aren't going to try to push your boundaries or press on your cracks if they like ya. If anything they'll make it really easy for you if they find you attractive. I'm with you so far... If your wife, girlfriend or some random lady is disrespecting you by trying to push your buttons, she had no respect for you in the first place, if she had respect she wouldn't be pushing your boundaries. And you …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 07:08 PM
5

Of course I wasn't going around shrieking "LOOK AT ME I'M SO CONFIDENT, I DON'T NEED NO MAN!!!" I was still pleasant and quiet, but not an anxious shrinking violet like I was before. Yeah I can see it now. I still can't say confidence is in and of itself sexually attractive to me, but certainly a lack of it as you pointed out (because of anxiety) can be unattractive. And I absolutely get the body language/eye contact thing. I wasn't necessarily anxious in a clinical sense, but when I was younger…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 06:48 PM
3

I think what people get wrong is thinking they can compensate lack of ability with fake confidence. I'll be real here: This is exactly what RP describes as "fake it til you make it". I can see how that can help some men out, but I determined up front it wasn't something I was interested in. If I couldn't figure out how to "make it" without faking, I wasn't going to make it. And I was actually OK with that outcome eventually. Don't take that to mean I think its useless advice. I think for men wit…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 06:35 PM
3

Aka a woman who doesn't ask "Am I fat" everyday and expecting her man to continually reassure her that no, weighing 100lb at 5'6" is not fat. Completely NOT the image the words "confident woman" bring to my mind. To me there is a vast difference between a woman that is self-assured enough to not ask "do these jeans make me look fat" and a woman that constantly wants to have a pissing contest with me. The term "confident" leads me more to the latter, not the former.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 06:20 PM
5

Its the lack of humility I find repulsive more often than not, from men AND women.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 06:16 PM
7

It seems when most guys say shy they don't mean shy (i.e. socially anxious), they mean sweet, soft-spoken, unassuming. Right. we are having the same issue with the term "confident" as well. I immediately thought "bitching harpy" when in fact I'm seeing that many consider "confidence" to be something closer to self-esteem and awareness of your abilities. So yeah, I'll say that when I think "shy girl", I'm really thinking soft-spoken and demure, not socially anxious, which is probably closer to th…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 06:15 PM
2

pretty much anyone who is having sex is a chad. No. Chad will be having more sex with more partners overall than the average man. Sure, he may ONLY be having a lot of sex with a specific sub-set of women, but in that circle, he's a Chad. Another term for it is "situational alpha", and for most men that is the best they can ever hope to attain. And even then? Most won't even manage that. But, its a much better chance than trying to take that same man and make him universally appealing to "all wom…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 06:06 PM
3

Hopefully you won't have to choose one or the other! I really don't think I did. Which is why I'm back peddling a little bit in this thread now. If "confidence" is simply knowing your abilities and being secure in them, then really my wife meets that definition. She takes no shit, kicks ass, and gets things done. (as was pointed out up thread). HOWEVER, she doesn't really ever talk about that fact, doesn't think its something to brag about, and I don't think even considers it anything OTHER than…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 05:56 PM
4

Usually the kind I meet is "Knows what she can do. Gets things done. Doesn't even consider an emotional self-appraisal." I swear most "confident" people I know, men AND women, break their arms patting themselves on the back regularly. I LOVE a quiet, gets things done kind of person, but holy shit are they hard to find. Mostly because they aren't making noise about how well they get shit done. Which means I can spot them easily at the office, but outside of work, its damned near impossible.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 05:46 PM
5

They may not be sexually attractive, but lots of men find those to be attractive for a relationship, which is what women want anyway. Of course! But she has to be attractive enough to get his attention first. No different than all us "nice guys" with charming personalities striking out. RMV traits only matter AFTER you pass the SMV threshold. Confidence (depending on how we define it which is obviously an issue here already) is generally great for LTR/marriage. It has very little to do with raw …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 05:28 PM
2

I'm not sure what the fact that you haven't met many of them has to do with whether or not they are attractive. Meet cooler people. The issue is, most people that I've encountered that were confident were ALSO a bit full of themselves because of it. Or, maybe they were confident because they were full of themselves? Chicken and egg... I know "cooler" people, they are my few close friends. But it isn't like quiet, confident people are just falling off of trees. I'm sure they are around, but they …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 05:19 PM
1

Quietly assured people are attractive to the majority of people. Sure! They are also pretty rare, at least around these parts.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 05:14 PM
2

I think many people here don't really understand what confidence means. It's not bitchiness, dominance, or arrogance, it's just trusting in your own value, abilities and judgment. And most of the time it goes hand in hand with self-esteem. Well now, if the OP had said high self-esteem was attractive in women I'd have agreed 100%. In addition, I clearly dislike "confident" women because I certainly do attribute "bitchiness", "arrogance", and being overly boisterous part of that mix. I've know ver…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 04:45 PM
3

They really can't see when shyness is faked? What part of "clueless beta" do you not understand? LOL
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 04:13 PM
4

That's why you just shut it down and she'll probably never do it again. You won't have to do on a regular basis. I get that, but again, I'll be honest: that's far too much effort in my opinion. Certainly when I can and have found a woman I'm attracted to and happy with that did NOT and does NOT require such. People will keep pushing and pushing when they see a crack. Again I'll be blunt: if you ever really want to piss me off? Keep pushing my boundaries. This is why I can't and won't deal with t…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 04:08 PM
2

It's actually just a bit of sense! I agree with you! I was just too clueless to see it in the past. And yes, I also agree that once you get that "spot" in her life, all you have to do is hold onto it. My point being, that becomes exponentially harder as she becomes more "bitchy". It takes more "hand" up front, and more "hand" throughout the relationship. I'll be blunt: this is primarily what the problem in my first marriage was. My ex requires more "hand", and its absolutely easy to see now that…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 03:51 PM
11

Me too. Still wouldn't have marred them. I liked them even though they were "bitchy" because I didn't have to sleep with them, and didn't have to directly deal with their attitudes.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 02:52 PM
5

Confidence is sexually attractive to a majority of men. If its a quiet confidence? To an extent sure. But the moment she becomes vocal about her "confidence"? No thanks.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 02:48 PM
6

I get the impression he's trying to shame us here? Look I'll make this simple: I know beyond all doubt a "bitchy" woman can be managed by a "strong" man. Fuck all that noise sideways. If it means I'm "weak" because I don't want to keep some harpy "in line", so be it. I'm not looking to add difficulty to my life, I have enough thanks.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 02:45 PM
3

Any girl is submissive for the right man. It's just that they are too weak to make a fiery slut submissive. DUDE! For real, the blue flair is almost silly now...
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 02:42 PM
4

You'd settle for a girl who isn't Stacey. I'd have had to actually want to be with Stacey first in order to "settle" for less. I've always been far more attracted to Stacey's less "hot", less "popular", less promiscuous female friends. I also like thicker/curvy women, and Stacey is usually too "sporty" for my tastes. I don't really enjoy sports cars. I like a luxury ride, smooth on the long stretches, not tight in the corners.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 02:41 PM
15

A lot of men can just shut that shit down. This is why weaker men should stay away from those types of women. ROFL - that is such a RP statement I swear you REALLY need to change your flair color. :P Yeah I actually get that the right kind of "strong man" can shut a bitch down with a quickness. But why in the HELL would I want to take that on in my personal life? Its serves me well in the office, but I'll be damned if I have to pull that shit in my own home just to keep the peace. It isn't the l…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 02:11 PM
3

From what little I've seen, it seems women's faults are magnified as an overreaction against a previous instinct to ignore them Sure, for me this is kinda what AWALT does: reminds me to be wary of those faults I used to ignore. while men's are rated more on whether or not they followed an approved plan. In the 'sphere? I think men's faults are often glossed over, or somehow warped into a virtue instead of simply calling it what it is and moving on.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 01:55 PM
2

I always liked "you tend to lose them like you found them."
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 01:37 PM
1

Male Hetero/straight Southwestern PA and surrounding tri-state area (Ohio/WV) Definitely born working class poor. Probably floating somewhere at the low end of middle class financially. raw attraction? probably around a 6-7 depending on my current dedication to exercise. LOL 46 I have never really struggled to get into LTRs. When I wanted a relationship, I found someone willing in every case. However, my issues involved the lack of ability to maintain those LTRs more than a few years with a sati…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 01:34 PM
2

Doesn't automatically make the guy a chad. For all intent and purpose, if she literally tingled simply by his presence, he's her Chad. Or her "situational alpha". Or whatever you want to call it. It really doesn't get any better than that when it comes to attraction from a woman. The term "just her type" is basically a different way of describing HER flavor of "alpha/Chad".
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/16 01:14 PM
3

If the end game is supposed to be improving your relationship, then great. Well this is where it gets complicated. I use RP to improve my relationship. I can't say that all men do so, and in many cases they may be simply trying to collect notches. While I may not see that as a worthy goal, I'm also not going to state that any more than I'd tell a mountain climber I think they're silly for climbing Mt. Everest. I'm in no position to tell other men how to properly utilize RP knowledge, unless they…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/16 08:08 PM
6

I see a vast difference between the RP men who use RP ideology to justify their anger/frustration at the world, and those who use it to improve their relationships. It's almost like two different species. RP isn't supposed to be used to "justify anger/frustration" at all. Sure, it'll cause a LOT of it, but that's to be expected when your world view changes. To me any man simply venting in the 'sphere is not really RP. (No true Scotsman!) I say that because the idea isn't to find RP, and then con…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/16 07:09 PM
1

You can tell me over and over that is this great theoretical step forward for men, but it really is the sum of its members. At the end of the day, that would only concern me if I cared about RPs image, and I don't. Mostly I'm RP because it works. (so far. Check in with me on my death bed for the full summary LOL) I have no desire whatsoever to help "clean up" the RP image, and as far as I can tell there is NO WAY to stop the extremes from changing the tone. Sure it "appeals" to sexists and misog…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/16 06:58 PM
6

The point is, a healthy loving relationship is practically immune to Chad. But an unhealthy/unstable one isn't (from a female pov). From a male PoV, its often not so easy to determine how "healthy" his GF/Wife sees the relationship. I've said a million times women happy in their relationships generally don't cheat. The issue isn't the cheating, its figuring out exactly what a "healthy" relationship is to my wife, and making sure our marriage never, EVER falls below that threshold. Because once i…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/16 06:01 PM
6

In short the difference is (according to red pill and in my experience): if a man is attracted to another woman and doesn't act on it, nothing happens. If a woman is attracted to another guy and doesn't act on it, she will lose at least some attraction to her partner. Pretty much this exactly. LTR minded RP men tend to always want to be the most attractive man in their SO's eyes. The moment that changes is the moment things start going down hill.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/16 05:54 PM
1

I do actually know what it takes to improve oneself, having gone through it all myself, but unless you are on team "I hate Feminism" no one cares what you have to say when it comes to red pill. You know you're preaching to the choir, right? Don't think for one moment I'd get a warmer welcome stating this stuff at TRP because I have a red flair. Much of the reason I participate less in the 'sphere at large these days is the shouting down of "opposing" RP views. If that's what those sites want to …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/16 05:35 PM
1

Relationship attention doesn't mean much. Sad but true.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/16 02:42 PM
2

It only needs to last for one night. ;-)
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/16 02:22 PM
2

So much this! I spent more time figuring out the correct "slant" to put on my papers than the actual content, because what got me good grades was writing something the professor agreed with, NOT necessarily writing a good paper at all. Jump through hoops, get a degree!
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/16 02:02 PM
4

projecting their problems on to women and hating on women I know you're tired of seeing this here at PPD but: if this is what's happening, those guys are doing it wrong. Blaming "women" is like the very first step in the anger process. Next the guy is supposed to realize that HE was the one that fucked up in the past. HE had the ability to do better. HE is the one that needs to change. And at that point, "blaming women" is supposed to mostly stop. Now, that being said? I often point out how wome…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/16 01:40 PM
2

Not sure how this applies but OK. Mostly I'm trying to head my girls off from creating their own personal dead bedroom by settling for something lukewarm.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/16 01:15 PM
1

Men are most likely to go for the "prettiest" woman that will marry him. And many/most men may not be looking to deeply under that pretty surface. And really I'm not "a lot" of RPers. ;-)
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/16 01:10 PM
1

That's why the poster stated she valued her education above all else. She probably takes her ability to attract men for granted, whereas most guys cannot do the opposite. ROFLMAO! This I can get behind. But maybe taking that attention for granted isn't the best bet, since it'll fade with looks over time.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 08:39 PM
2

However with TRP you guys seem almost happy to classify Women into these very narrow and restrictive boxes, you even have a saying, 'AWALT' to emphasise that point, I mean I've never really seen a feminist claim 'AMALT'. I'll be the first one to admit men have plenty of their own shitty behaviors that women are forced to deal with. However that isn't something I personally have to deal with, so to be frank I don't put much thought into it. I resent the classification, and as a Woman I find it th…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 08:37 PM
1

Do you understand? LOL I do. But isn't the real question here what the man she's trying to attract thinks? I mean, I value my stubbornness a great deal (no really, I see it as a good thing) however I can COMPLETELY understand why my wife may have a different opinion of that particular trait. And in fact may be with me in SPITE of it. It would be silly of me to think SHE values it more than I do when in fact its probably a pain in her ass.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 08:11 PM
3

However, it does not follow that women will value men's opinion of them above all else Well only in so much as it gets them the man they want, I'd agree. However, until they find such a man, women won't know exactly what about them he will "value" more. So just like men, women should be doing "things" for themselves while considering how it affects their dating opportunities. I completely understand why a woman would be proud of her degree. I even think its great she's proud of it. However her e…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 07:58 PM
3

Which part of this did you not understand? The debate. It seems looks are the most important since they are a requirement before any engagement with a man can begin. The more attractive she is, the more opportunities she has.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 07:47 PM
3

Dont you see how that could be a recipe for disaster? ROFL it certainly can be! I'm not saying they are completely at odds. Its true that an "attractive" woman is going to generate attention from other men. At a high level, that isn't a good "trait" in a wife. Especially when you consider that "attractive" women tend to be flirty, "bubbly", engaging, and so on, she isn't going to STOP being attractive simply because she's wearing a wedding ring. In addition, in many cases a person (man or woman)…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 07:46 PM
2

Then perhaps I'm confused about this thread and a few others today. Men tend to approach women they find attractive. That's it. The more universally "attractive" a woman is, the more interest she'll generate. What she does with that interest depends largely on her, but the fact remains she has more of it. Does that not indicate that her physical attractiveness is the most important trait for finding a mate? Is there any woman that wants a husband to love her for her BS in English and disappointe…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 07:27 PM
2

Yes, the most important thing to do in a marriage is the ability to attract a lot of people, thats what makes a good wife....... Not at all! That's how you BECOME a wife, which is what we are discussing. What makes a woman a good wife are in many cases completely different than the traits that landed her the audition in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 07:19 PM
3

It doesn't really matter to her whether or not you value it, it is something of value to her. But in the context of dating and mating, HER value of her education isn't important, but how the man approaching her values it. We don't get to choose what others find attractive about us OTHER than by selecting who we partner off with. And even then, it is still a crap shoot if he really loves your degree or your ass.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 07:14 PM
1

And just being an asshat isn't going to get you laid. As you said, you can get laid Despite being an asshat, but you're not going to get laid just for being one. Right but you skipped right over the part that in many cases being an "asshat" is easier to accomplish. No, being one wont necessarily get you laid, but it also won't prevent it. So where is the incentive? Because the vast majority of people are nice. That's not some sort of trait that people need to develop. This is where we disagree. …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 06:24 PM
1

For relationships, most guys other guys call "assholes" aren't really assholes in relationships. This was part of the "mystery" for me early on. But more to the point, what men consider "asshole" behavior and what women consider "asshole" behavior don't necessarily align well. Most relationships can't sustain one person being an asshole and another just sucking it up. 100% agree, but you probably know that already. Depends what you're seeking. For initial raw attraction you don't need many thing…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 06:19 PM
2

Are you married? I'm married, I really enjoy sex with my husband, it's the bees knees. I'm on marriage number 2. Marriage 1 ended in a dead bedroom and an "I love you but I'm not in love with you" statement. Word for word, not exaggerating. I really enjoyed sex with my ex until she didn't, and from there it died a slow and horrible death. I'm very fond of sex with my current wife, but I also put more focus on sexual compatibility this time around, as I'm sure you can understand. I don't understa…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 06:08 PM
2

patently ridiculous. it's paranoia. I wish I could agree with you, but not only have I seen it, I lived it. Not saying I didn't have fault there, because I probably shoulder most of the blame, but to call it paranoia is misleading. I didn't come to RP out of some idle curiosity. I found it trying to find answers for my own experiences. There is no way in hell I would EVER have found the 'sphere if I hadn't already been on the wrong side of the fence, so to speak. And I've seen it happen with oth…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 05:53 PM
1

Douchebag behavior isn't really reward. What's rewarded is the things that leads to douchebag behavior, such as confidence, talent, popularity etc. But here's the thing: if a man can be "rewarded" without having to be "nice", what makes you think he'd choose to be nice at all? Sure its easy to see that an asshat getting laid regularly may be getting it in SPITE of the fact that he's an asshat, (because he is ALSO very confident, arrogant, dominant, etc.) and can't help but think maybe being "nic…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 05:35 PM
5

Your most valued asset TO YOU is your education, for the purpose of supporting yourself and your loved ones. It is NOT your most valuable asset for attracting men to you for dating, sex and marriage. This seems as obvious to me as "being nice" wont get you laid. However I can't say I've always seen that as obvious, so maybe us RP men aren't the only clueless ones around.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 05:23 PM
10

You honestly believe that Women have nothing more important to contribute to our society than their looks My sex drive doesn't give a rats ass about what any individual woman did for "society". I mean, you realize most "nice guys" do a lot for "society" and it doesn't get them any success in dating and mating, right? You are confusing a person's "human worth" with what an individual woman is "worth" to me here. I may look at a woman and say she is an awesome human being with many redeeming quali…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 05:19 PM
2

I'm just a bit confused because it feels like this switches based on the conversation. No, it switches based on what "phase" the woman in question is in. Is she "young and having fun" or is she "getting older and needs to settle down", because that will largely determine what types of men she's targeting in the current moment. The same women that "fuck Chad" in their 20's will be "gold-diggers" in their 30's, of course taken to extreme for the sake of demonstration. Put another way: women put a …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 05:10 PM
3

I suspect when it comes to LTRs/marriage, men tend to focus on traits that inspire "attraction", but often don't put enough emphasis on other traits that are important for the long haul. In contrast, women tend to focus a bit TOO MUCH on those other traits when seeking a LTR mate, and tend to disregard lower basic "attraction" up front. Somewhere in the middle is probably the most likely to succeed.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 04:27 PM
3

Total derail: I honestly don't know a single woman with an extra 1k to spend on a boy toy. Hell with trips as cheap as they are, I only know a few COUPLES with the extra cash to travel like that. It isn't just "middle America" where people are living check to check. (unless everything OTHER than the coasts are "middle America")
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 04:10 PM
4

everyone wants the best person who'd settle with them. Sure, but men in a general sense are perfectly content to be with a woman that isn't necessarily "equal" or "better" than he is himself. And in a general sense, women are only interested in men "better" than they are, but often settle for "equal". And of course, its damned difficult to define "equal" and "better" in a general sense, because individual preferences skew the objective measurements we could attempt to make. But in general, the c…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 03:42 PM
3

You have to agree, though, that's not what's most displayed at TRP. I don't make a habit of reading the TRP sub. I don't recognize much of it as the Red Pill I know, but I'm by no means an expert on RP. I took/take what I want from the buffet of info and leave the rest. So the best I can say is: I know what RP concepts work for me. Your mileage may vary.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 03:34 PM
3

This also lends itself to what I believe to be a failing of TRP--that is, from what I've seen, even RP-aware men are still mostly unable to evaluate women based on factors outside their attractiveness. The funny thing is, RP is what showed me how to go about evaluating those "other" traits outside of how attractive I find a particular woman. So while I agree with you that many men have difficulty separating "hot" from "good wife material", I'd counter that at least in my case, RP pointed it out …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 02:49 PM
1

Just not with sex in most cases. Now you have me imagining a world where the nicer a man is, the more he gets laid. ROFL war would end over night!
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 02:34 PM
5

Sometimes I get the sense a lot of TRPers would have pushed their daughter to marry someone like this and then call her a harpy when she wants a divorce 10 years later. I can't speak for other RP men, but I've told both of my daughters to never commit to a man they are anything less than crazy about. If there is a doubt, its one too many.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 02:31 PM
2

The red pill often cites the long marriages of the 50s as evidence of marriage contentment. Contentment? HELL no. The long marriages of the 50's is evidence that once upon a time, we took the marriage contract far more seriously than we do today. The happiness of those marriages is beside the point in my mind. And in fact, I'm of the mind that seeking "happiness" in marriage is a sure sign it will fail eventually. Of course I'd hope happiness is part of the package, but setting it as a goal is d…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/16 02:19 PM
4

The wall for men isn't as dramatic, because most men don't really have any real "advantage" being young and fit. Sure, as they age they are less physically attractive, but most men didn't have great looks at the top of their attractive traits anyway, so losing a little bit of that boyish look doesn't diminish their physical attractiveness as much in general. However, the beer gut is a totally different story, but CAN absolutely be avoided. Put another way, most men don't go through a period of b…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/16 07:59 PM
1

I assure you if a girl is just seeing a guy casually she won't know much about his personality either. I dunno man. I've known women that gave new meaning to the term STR that still knew their current man's favorite color, birthday (and of course Zodiac sign!), and his shoe size. I was probably with my wife at least 6 months before I learned her shoe size, and only then it was because I went high heel shopping with her. (how else can I ensure the new pumps are bed worthy?!)
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/16 02:21 PM
2

Men that actually love their partners and not just their bodies and the fact that they get sex will be able to give good gifts instead of having no idea that there is a soul inside his sextoy. Way to assume! I don't like getting presents, and as such I'm terrible at buying them for others. In fact, getting a present from someone usually just makes me feel bad and obligated. Bad because I rarely act surprised or elated when I open a present, even if I like it, I'm not emotionally expressive and w…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/16 02:17 PM
3

with guns!
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/16 02:56 PM
1

The only people I know that don't drink have quit for health reasons. Not saying we're all party, all the time. But there's always at least wine and beer. This time of year, usually a healthy selection of mixed hard stuff as well. So yeah. Don't really hang with a dry crowd. Lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/16 12:16 AM
5

You may find it hard to believe, but I fully agree with you on this one.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/16 03:37 PM
4

If you don't like this environment, why take part in it? It's easy enough to avoid. RP men are not a hive mind. I doubt those complaining about the environment (like myself) are the ones taking "advantage" of it. And it's easy to avoid participation directly, sure. But harder to avoid women that have participated in the past. So active avoidance doesn't mean complete removal of negative effects. Hence sour grapes as Griddy calls it.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/16 03:08 PM
5

Are you new here? /s
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/16 02:30 PM
8

I believe "they made their bed" apllies here lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/16 02:29 PM
6

No one anywhere will say RP can save your relationship. RP will improve the chances of success with all women in general, but the truth is the woman a man is already with may never see him in a better light. That mans goal shouldn't be "save my marriage" it should be "make myself a badass and maybe she'll be happy to stick around" and even then I'd say he's hoping too much for an outcome. And personally, I don't think many relationships can be saved. Or should be. It's a much tougher hill to cli…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/16 02:21 PM
1

Is that surprising? Chances are he never had a chance to sex up a woman 2-3 points hotter than she is. Chances are she did sex up a guy 2-3 points hotter than he is. But I'm sure his personality makes up for the lack of attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/16 03:35 PM
2

Wouldn't life be a lot better if men could evolve beyond sexual desires? HELL no! Life is awesome because I'm getting my sexual desires met. That shit gets me out of bed in the morning.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/16 02:05 PM
2

Provided I was single and thought she was hot, I'd give her my Google voice number. I use it for random stuff anyway, and if she turned out to be a loon its easy enough to change it. No way in hell she's getting my actual cell number though. I've had that since cell phones were bricks, and I'm not giving it up now.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/16 08:38 PM
1

I'm pretty sure what I was offering back in the day was far closer to broccoli than chocolate. Most people want chocolate after all. :P
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/16 08:35 PM
1

The golden rule in this case means 'Offer them something they want to eat' not 'Offer them something you want to eat.' Sure, but I was told women liked broccoli. At least "good" women did.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/16 07:53 PM
1

Does he have an apocalypse bunker too? You can only call it that IF its stocked with rations AND a lot of weaponry. Otherwise its at best a bomb shelter. ;-)
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/16 05:46 PM
3

Totally missed the "something between" in the sentence?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/16 03:53 AM
3

Do you think it should include PUA style advice? PUA?! OH hell no. Our schools have a hard enough time teaching math and science, I can't imagine how trying to teach PUA would go down. But to the point, I think it should be more than just showing kids how to use condoms with bananas. And truth be told, it should be parents and NOT the school teaching this stuff, but its obvious many parents don't or can't do so. Being in a classroom of all females did NOT make me feel comfortable enough to ask q…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/16 08:59 PM
1

When we fear danger he orders me to hide and get down and he confronts it. We have actually drilled this, one of his complaints was always women are so stupid that if a man barked "get down" aggressively when he spotted danger the average dumb cunt would argue with him and get shot. ROFLMAO! I've had this exact conversation with my wife! I told her straight up if I tell her to run/hide/get down, do it, because if she decides to try and stand with me, I'm going to lose trying to protect her ass. …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/16 08:49 PM
6

If TRP "denounced" Rollo, then I have zero in common with them. That's not to say I think he's the pinnacle of RP, but in my mind he is beyond all doubt part of its foundation. I did get same-sex only sex ed. What makes you think that made it any better? I didn't. we sat in a classroom of boys and girls and talked about the biology of sex, so things like periods, erections, the mechanics of it, but very little about the rest. WHich is like handing a 16 year old the service manual for your car an…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/16 08:25 PM
9

I think the root of this is confusing being nice with flirting, a huge issue among "nice guys" in general. Is that really a surprise? I basically grew up believing that "being sexual" with a woman was disrespectful. Full stop. So anytime I "flirted" with a woman, I was mostly just being "nice". And, when a woman was "nice" to me, guess how I saw it? Worse yet? I remember a few women getting more "sexual" with me, and I immediately labelled them "damaged goods", because what "good" woman would be…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/16 08:20 PM
2

What about raw physical power? The power to force another person into submission with just your body is something most women will never be able to do. Absolutely restricted at least in the West by the law. It doesn't matter that I'm physically stronger than the average women, because she has the ability to get strength "on demand" by calling the police. Not saying that's a bad thing, just pointing out that in the modern world men's greater strength is VERY regulated.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/16 08:08 PM
2

Interesting perspective! Might also partly explain why the demographics of the 'sphere are changing. As us "clueless" men from the 80's and 90's get our shit straight, we leave for greener pastures leaving behind a completely different set of men with completely different problems.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/16 07:55 PM
5

I'm not so sure honestly. I'd prefer to see something between what we have now and a curriculum written by Rollo. Maybe we should just have same-sex only sex ed. I know. Blasphemy.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/16 07:42 PM
2

I don't eat Red meat. I like my steak walked past the fire on the hoof, and then slapped on my plate still mooing. If you're serious about the red meat thing, you probably never want to see me taking on a steak dinner. When I grill them at home, I have to arm wrestle with the boys to see who gets to drink the "plate juice" after the meal is done. (the blood/juice that's left on the plate after steaks have rested.)
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/16 03:18 PM
2

Only your mother will love you for "who you are". Yeah, I learned that in the 'sphere.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/16 02:57 PM
11

I'd see it the same way. I believe the best course of action is to terminate the marriage. I understand why that is most often easier said than done.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/16 03:04 PM
11

I don't "agree with" cheating under any circumstances. However, having spent some time in a DB, I can absolutely understand why a man in such a situation might go that route. Doesn't mean I think its OK, or right, or even acceptable. But I get it.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/16 01:53 PM
3

They want to be in charge of everything and they will generally "shit in the sandbox" and ruin the game for everyone rather than submit This. Used to keep that impulse in check a great deal in the past, not so much these days. Interestingly, things are going much smoother for me now that I just go for what I want instead of being concerned with how other people feel about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/16 09:14 PM
1

Assuming I'm right though, you will never be able to convince women to take on the sensitive role by saying 'women are better at emotionality, and men are better at rationality' because no one in their right mind thinks that the two are equivalent. Who cares if they are "equivalent" at all? I'm looking for a happy, healthy, functioning LTR/marriage. I could give a rats ass what others think is "equivalent" or not. I don't care that there are contrary voices, I only need one woman to agree with m…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/16 09:04 PM
1

That doesn't sound like a good option either. Its a horrible option, but many still see it as the best one to choose. If he shows up once in awhile with groceries, its more than you had yesterday. Or maybe he drops cash while he's around. Keeps the electricity on even though he doesn't stay there. Pays for a cellphone but expects you to respond when he calls.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/16 08:30 PM
2

Where did the concept that "stoic" men have no emotions come from? OF COURSE they have emotions. ALL people have emotions. The difference is in how they are expressed, and stoic men tend to have rather tight reign on their emotional responses.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/16 08:01 PM
1

I am probably less emotional than 50% of men I meet, so what good would it do for me to 'realize what I am' as a woman? You brought up that women are often "ashamed" of their emotional states, and I was simply stating that's silly in my mind. Don't be ashamed, be aware, and adjust accordingly. I tend to avoid very emotional women though. Sometimes I think I'm swimming in an ocean of them. Avoiding "emotional" women would mean avoiding most women I know. The existence of less emotional women won'…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/16 07:56 PM
2

Ok, so maybe this happens more frequently in the lower classes. Exactly. When women have less "viable" options in their locale, they are quick to share whatever they can rather than go without. Doesn't seem to be happening when it comes to high value, attractive women who have options. How "high value" do you think the women are that working class guys are shooting for? They aren't looking at a woman with a masters degree, they're probably looking at a woman that works retail. Or low end medical…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/16 07:40 PM
3

Women want men to be emotional so that we no longer have to be ashamed of our own emotions. seems to make more sense for women to realize they are what they are, and for men to realize the same. Getting men to be more "emotional" is attempting to drag the counterbalance to your emotional state down to your level, so to speak. Being emotional has served women well, or it wouldn't be so prevalent. The problem is: what serves individual women well may NOT serve their relationships as well, and in f…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/16 06:53 PM
5

There absolutely can be 'checks and balances' even in a C/Fm marriage. The ultimate check/balance is she can leave anytime she wants. The fact that I'd prefer she doesn't leave tends to put me in the mindset that I need to be aware of her needs as well as my own, and the needs of our relationship above both. Put another way, in many ways I think a C/Fm marriage is a bit like a Dom/sub BDSM relationship (as I've read. I have NO personal experience) when the sub "doms from the bottom", in that alt…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/16 05:25 PM
2

Why should I be that trusting of authority? If you can't trust the man you are marrying? I'd suggest you cancel the wedding.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/16 04:08 PM
1

I asked about a law about general broadcast of identities online. So Doxxing sites? Places like "people of Walmart"? Good luck. I can't think of any way to legislate that away without being overly draconian about it. If I own a suvellence camera, I have access to everything it records. If it catches something interesting/funny, how exactly would you stop me from posting it online? And unless it actually caused harm to your reputation, how would you even know? And if it DOES cause you harm, I bel…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/16 03:48 PM
1

States are starting to criminalize revenge porn with specific criminal statutes. For example, New Jersey’s invasion of privacy law, enacted in 2004 (before revenge porn came to national attention), prohibits selling, providing, publishing, distributing, or otherwise disseminating nude or sexual photos of another person without that person’s permission (the penalty is a three-to-five year prison sentence or a fine up to $30,000). Wisconsin’s statute is similar (nine months’ imprisonment, and/or a…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/16 02:23 PM
1

The legal framework is there, all you need to do is expand it to cover the internet. So your point isn't the taking of the photo, its the photo being put online and shared freely? OK I do understand that, but I'm fairly sure such laws already exist in one form or another. Again, my primary point is I don't like the idea of adding more laws to the books IF they laws we already have suffice. In many cases, the issue is existing law is NOT enforced, and instead of simply doing so we add more layers…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/16 02:13 PM
1

If you can't get that I dunno what else to say really man. I get the difference but I disagree with the premise. How exactly would you intend to enforce such a law? Arrest everyone you see on the street holding up a cell phone? Would we need "picture areas" to take vacation photos without accidentally breaking the law? I don't like creepy people doing creepy shit, but that does NOT mean I think we need a law specifically to stop it. It largely depends on exactly how creepy that behavior is, and …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/16 01:22 PM
1

But to what end? What's so different between a camera over my door taking video of a woman and me taking a pic with my phone? In either case the woman has no control over it and probably no knowledge it happened. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a fan of survallence. However, I'm not about to start dissecting the different types of survallence techniques when we've already established that no one has a reasonable expectation of privacy in public. Unless we pull all survallence cameras off the street,…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/16 01:06 AM
2

I'm also in favour of the laws banning taking photos of someone in public without the individual's consent and think these should be expanded outside of a sexual context. And make every survallence camera pointing towards the street illegal by doing so. Possibly ATM cameras as well. And traffic cams? If I can't snap a pic with my cell phone, why can Walmart take video of me loading my groceries? If you walk on the street in any city you are constantly being watched by devices with lenses taking …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/16 12:55 AM
2

Both have the same requirements. The LTR guy just lacks sex appeal. Yep! So the man in question isn't "hot enough" to get a free pass, and he knows it. And he's also starting the LTR from a weaker position because of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/16 09:01 PM
2

There's been crossover between hip-hop and R&B for over a decade. ROFL to some of us a decade isn't all that long. :P
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/16 07:38 PM
2

I just happened to grow up at a time of massive social change, and all of the values that were given to me and that were central to the old society rapidly became obsolete and I didn't have any idea what to do in the new society. In fact, in many ways the new society was unattractive and vulgar to me. It still is, actually. Seconded! I'm not in the camp that intends to "enjoy the decline".
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/16 07:36 PM
6

They like masculine men and bad boys happen to be masculine. They hate that they like them despite that. I can't help but point out you aren't necessarily helping the BP cause with this statement. You are implying that women may "hate" being attracted to bad boys, but can't help themselves regardless. For a guy that is looking for notches without commitment, that sounds almost ideal. In addition, a guy like that seems to be getting sex WITHOUT sacrificing much on his end, which again isn't helpi…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/16 07:25 PM
6

I'm married with two kids of my own and two step kids. Same here, although my oldest is now out of the house and on her own, mostly. :P
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/16 02:33 PM
2

I think you described perfect passive dread. This is what I aim for in fact. This ensures I'll never need active dread.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/16 12:33 AM
6

Red because that's where I found balance.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/16 12:14 AM
1

You aren't falling short, I do understand you. I've known women that have described exactly what you did above. I've also known plenty that were far more "aggressive" along these lines. So while I understand it may take you time to warm up to any particular man, another woman might react positively to him on first meeting, and that is the type of response I'm looking for from a mate. Not a "the more I get to know him the greater he is" thing but a "hot damn this guy is bomb AND looking for somet…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/16 04:57 PM
1

Sounds like initially yes, they may not feel immediate attraction. Or, maybe they do and don't act on it. I'd be looking for the latter and not the former. And I did clearly state this above here: If she doesn't bang "Chads" now, I wouldn't expect her to act like she does with me. So I've accounted for women with no ONS experience in my comment. I've personally not met one in ages, so I don't see much point in concerning myself with them. Since I tend to like rather sexually reactive women, I'm …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/16 04:29 PM
2

Makes sense. But if she spent years test driving Lambos, I don't want to be the BMW she eventually decides is the best trade off. Certainly if "maintenance" was a primary concern for her. Because anytime I break down, she may be thinking "if this BMW is gonna cost this much to keep, I should have risked the Lambo." She may come to resent my maintenance costs, even though they are lower, because she chose me hoping I'd be easier to maintain, not because she really wanted a BMW.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/16 04:59 PM
1

ROFL that's totally fair, not that you need me to confirm it hahaha. That's the problem with AWALT: because I have a red flair, people assume I ONLY think women suck. Nope, I've just known men sucked all my life. Took me awhile to include women on the list. So yeah, "people suck" includes AWALT and AMALT.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/16 08:54 PM
2

Of course I don't believe that. I honestly think it's relative. And I agree with you, at least high level. When it comes down to me and the woman sitting across the table, I'm looking to see where I land on HER 80/20 scale. Same heuristics apply, but now I can hone in on that "relativity" and narrow it down to her specific tastes. And ideally of course I'm looking to be in her top 20, or I'm increasing my chances of failure from the gate. But my main point is that you cannot separate attraction …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/16 08:51 PM
1

In the context of 80/20 and hypergamy and how that relates to women?! If the OP wrote "how does 80/20 manifest in male behavior" we'd be having a different conversation.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/16 08:38 PM
1

I mean do u think the same exact qualities are looked for in committed relationships and NSA sex? But what point is there to starting a life-long relationship with a woman that doesn't think you are hot enough for sex without being something more? I get that LTRs require much more than looks, but doesn't it seem like setting yourself up for failure if you can't FIRST pass the threshold the men that did NOT have to be "nice" did? Certainly if you are looking for high levels of sexual chemistry in…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/16 08:36 PM
1

Don't men think that too? Some surely at least. I'm not looking to marry a man though, so what may or may not lead "men" to leave a relationship isn't something I've put much thought into. I know how I react when things get bad, and that's the only "male" part of marriage I'm concerned about. My advice to you and other women? Choose wisely!
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/16 08:25 PM
4

If 80/20 is real and applies to NSA sex, it certainly also has an effect on LTRs/marriage, Hence the concern that she is "settling". ;-)
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/16 08:18 PM
2

Ok but how is that somehow unique for women? Its not and I never claimed it was, I just use the term "hypergamy" when discussing such behavior from women. However (and inb4 COP OUT) I don't date and/or marry men, so I don't have much interest in how to determine which men are likely to stay and which are likely to "trade up" when the wall approaches. I'm not at all concerned that I will bail, so why would I be concerned that other men might? To be blunt, that's a problem for his GF/wife. All thi…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/16 08:08 PM
1

Doesn't it come down to a pessimistic view of reality vs. optimistic? There is a bit of a correlation between being RP and being a "half glass empty" type of personality, but I don't know that its enough to form a conclusion. For my part you are correct, I don't have a very good view of "humanity" to start with, so its no surprise I tend to be on the negative side of the conversation here as well. According to hypergamy I will, subconsciously or otherwise, always have a desire to leave my husban…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/16 07:50 PM
4

Some women don't experience a desire to switch up. At all. I think its fairly safe to say most women that are happy in their relationships aren't looking to "switch up", but that's because if she's happy with the hubby, there isn't any man better in existence, at least in her mind. The issue is, how does she feel about him when she is LESS than happy with her relationship? Because rest assured, there will come a time (or many) where things aren't going good, and it is THOSE moments, when she's l…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/16 07:43 PM
3

I concur with your statement, but the guy OP quoted explictly said productivity rates would rise. DOH you are correct, my mistake! (and what I get for trying to fit my PPD addiction into a busy work day...) For my part, there would NOT be an increase in production. I'd honestly become a lazy bum by most people's standards. LOL
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/16 07:27 PM
3

but then at the end he says if men weren't worried about attracting women they'd be free to do productive, interesting things. There are a million other things I'd rather be doing with my time than spending 8 hours a day 5 days a week working for someone else. (this is not me complaining, I have a good gig!) But, because I want a wife and family, I don't have much choice but to find a way to make the bucks required for the task. If I never wanted a family, I could very easily get by and be comfo…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/16 07:16 PM
1

No one feels that they are just their body/genitalia and no one wants their partner to see their worth as stemming from that entirely. Although I completely agree with you, this is getting into dicey territory. You simply can't dictate what your partner "values" in you past choosing who to pair off with. I state all the time that I don't want to be some woman's "perfect wallet", and because of that I try my best to find women that don't appear to be interested in me ONLY because of my wallet whe…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/16 06:04 PM
1

Re the guy I'm with now, before we even got into a LTR (we were friends first) I made sure to ask lots of questions about sexual frequency in his past relationships - without letting him know why I was asking. I just made out like it was normal conversation. I'd call this the "N" talk, but to your point it covers MUCH more ground than that so yeah I think I understand. And this time around, I'll admit it was a longer and more detailed conversation than perhaps in the past for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/16 02:04 PM
1

If a man puts a priority on sex when she's going through the above, without understanding and trying to work through it with her - then he's a giant dick. I wouldn't disagree with you here. If she hasn't been neglectful in the past and is currently going through any hardship (pregnancy, medical issue. etc) it would be a giant dick move to "dread" her into sex or some such thing. On women's side of it, I think more women need to understand how much their guy wants sex (which can seem hard to unde…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/16 08:55 PM
3

Tendies = chicken tenders? I'm not hip to the lingo LOL
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/16 08:17 PM
5

I think this is also why we (milennials) are on track to have fewer average sexual partners despite greater sexual tolerance. And here I thought it was because you all learned from our fuck ups :P
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/16 07:53 PM
1

Someone had to see it to prove it, but fair enough. I knew a guy an awful lot like described here: https://www.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/5h655u/who_is_chad/day2xr2/ /r/nomdplume described a man an awful lot like one I knew in my early 20's through mutual friends. I personally didn't like him at all because he was a boastful asshole at times, but the man got laid when he wanted. Some small details different but the overall gist is the same. He had a "reputation" as well for being a t…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/16 06:41 PM
4

I heard critiques of those guys' dick size more often than I heard breathless compliments. And I'm assuming those "critiques" came AFTER said woman had sex with him? Even if his dick is small, he still got the bang. So if the metric is "notch count" that small dicked "Chad" just scored. If he can do that again tomorrow, or the next day, and keep on doing it? That's WHY he's a "Chad" despite the little prick.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/16 06:32 PM
1

Sometimes I think RP has sent you into PPD as a gateway drug towards RP acceptance. You're just so much palatable than others, haha. ROFLMAO. No, if anything I simply felt less comfortable among "my own kind" for lack of a better term. And I'm mostly palatable because I'm LTR minded. Lets be honest, guys looking for nothing more than a notch count don't really have much incentive to be concerned over any woman's long term happiness or mental health. And I don't say that from a moral standpoint, …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/16 05:56 PM
2

When you already have the girl, you can impress them so much with small "nice" behaviors. OK maybe we have a definition problem here. To me, going out on "dates" after marriage isn't nice behavior. And I don't mean it isn't nice to go out, I mean when I personally think of being "nice" to someone, I'm thinking more along the lines of compliments, but really its just treating others as you wish to be treated by them. And, since I have no desire to "date" even when I'm dating, I would NOT think of…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/16 05:37 PM
1

But from an intellectual POV, I know RP's claims of universality are bullshit, and that's the aspect I like debating. That makes perfect sense to me LOL. And I'll admit I'd probably find it all rather off-putting if I wasn't one of those men it has helped. I can and have said there's plenty in the 'sphere that gives me pause, and plenty I downright reject. However, that doesn't change the fact that I see the world a little better with red tinted glasses on.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/16 04:45 PM
2

Nope. I was in my mid to late 30's in a dead bedroom marriage. And sure, after awhile my sex drive tanked and it LOOKED like my "gear" stopped working, but its funny. I have absolutely NO PROBLEMS with the "gear" in my current marriage. Seems that being married to a woman that makes it perfectly clear she has no sexual interest in you at all can cause ED! Who knew! /s
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/16 04:35 PM
2

Nothing said here will actually change my reality, so I'm not surprised you feel the same way. Yes and no. PPD hasn't "changed my reality" at all, but it HAS made it perfectly clear that "my reality" is not YOUR reality. That info doesn't necessarily help if I'm not in the position to actually change my reality (perhaps move to a new area. Get a new social circle, etc.) but if nothing else I now understand why many people are unhappy with RP when they find it. And more to the point, I now am beg…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/16 04:25 PM
1

Nah, just exaggerating the usual complaints against RP. But for real, I've gotten the impression from a few folks here that making sex priority #1 in a LTR/marriage is viewed as negative. I honestly do NOT understand that, since to me a LTR/Marriage is AT ITS CORE a sexual relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/16 01:43 PM
2

If I was the vindictive type person, I'd have found glee in her situation six to eight months past her walking out. By then she'd been P&D'ed once, and then found out the man she'd been "dating" for 2 months used to make money by having sex on camera with his ex. She called me crying when she found out, and I had to remind myself, repeatedly "she walked out. she walked out..." Only thing that really kept my resolve in check was that when she left, I told her if she needed to think things through…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/16 01:37 PM
1

I don't think all high L men are RP, nor are all RP men high L. I'm just agreeing with OP that there may be a correlation there.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/16 01:28 PM
1

i cant stand rollo and ian ironwoods wordy verbose prolix ENTP bloviating I've seen your opinion of Rollo LOL. I will NOT say he's anywhere near my favorite writer, however at least early on his writing although verbose got my attention, and at least way back then the comment section had a lot of guys that got me thinking. His style is dry, but for me that works. Sometimes if I'm trying to absorb "info", the least amount of distraction is the best. If he could just use less sentences. I mostly l…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/16 01:26 PM
1

LOL what's funny is, I agree he tends to be too "verbose", but I like his writing style far more than others who add far more emotional content to their pieces.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/16 01:17 PM
2

I honestly haven't looked at all so I could be WAY off base. I can only say that when I revisited some of my old haunts, they were digging on Roosh really hard with his then new song and dance. Now you have me curious, but I haven't gotten into the habit of reading RP blogs again, and I don't think I intend to, at least for now. Everything I see here tells me I won't like what I find anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 09:46 PM
1

"Hold my beer and watch this!" is a cliché for a reason. ROFL yeah I know. I was usually the guy holding the beer knowing full well I was about to watch something tragic AND entertaining. This must really vary depending on personality and parenting. Yes and yes. In my case, I wasn't ever going to be a "rambunctious" boy tearing up the house or the yard. I was chill by default. All the "don't be like THOSE men" messages only pushed me further into my own head than I already was, if that makes sen…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 09:42 PM
2

Same time frame I suspect, I just didn't like their writing style, and many of their most prolific regulars in the comment sections. I spent most of my time at Rational Male, Alpha game, Red Pill Room... Hell I forget half of them. My first landing zone was Married Man Sex Life, but didn't stay there very long. The Rational Male was where I spent the most time early on. Roosh was way too much into Pickup for my tastes if memory serves me correctly. (and these days it often doesn't) And then he k…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 09:30 PM
2

I'm not going to say Vox is the best writer in the world, but I found useful info there back in the day.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 09:16 PM
1

ROFL. Not surprising.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 08:48 PM
1

That's fair criticism (as if you needed me to say so LOL) but goes back to my point. One RP blog is not the same as the next, but in total they ALL paint a picture. I don't think you realize many of us old timers have been involved in the 'sphere for years. I started reading it in late 2010/early 2011. Some of the places I got the foundation of my RP learning are no longer in existence, or have changed tone along the way. Not all, but many. And even those that are still mostly the same certainly…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 08:30 PM
1

I beg to differ: http://alphagameplan.blogspot.com/2011/03/socio-sexual-hierarchy.html
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 08:16 PM
1

How much of that is you thinking of yourself as an asshole for enforcing your boundaries, so that anyone who calls you one, has a place as a prosecutor in your mental court? Very observant of you! Yep, this is an ongoing mental shift for me, and I'll fully admit I still see what many of you call "normal behavior" as something else, but it is changing over time. Because many have gone out of their way to separate the responsible redpill from TRP's version of it. Here's my beef though: Red Pill is…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 08:11 PM
3

You mean just like people on the internet? Mostly. As you can see I didn't take it too seriously.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 08:03 PM
1

In this respect it would be me. As in no woman in her 30's or 40's that I'm interested in is likely to have as "conservative" a sexual past as I have. There are plenty that may be as conservative, but I'm unlikely to meet them and/or find them attractive. I'd honestly have to be in the situation to determine what my limit would be.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 08:02 PM
2

What man doesn't want that? Touche! I just don't want to start from a place where I'm digging myself out of a hole in that respect. Honestly? I'm counting on this to pull us through the long haul, because no matter HOW hot I am today, I won't be as hot 10 years from now. I just don't want to have to start relying too much on that anytime soon. LOL
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 07:56 PM
3

If you're a guy you work to become that. I can't speak for other men, but this is entirely what I use RP for in my personal life. Maybe other men have known it for thousands of years, but its clear I had to have it spelled out. Funny thing? Once I understood the rules, I found that I play the game fairly well. shrug
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 07:35 PM
3

I don't understand how men can get aroused by just a picture of a naked stranger. TMI - you were warned :P A "hot" woman is hot. Full stop. Nice ass, nice chest, curvy shape and BOING that's all I need to fire up that particular motor. However, as the driver, I choose which road I intend to travel, and as such simply do not act on that desire 99.99999% of the time. If I did, I'd be talking to a LOT of random women, and none of us would be happy about that. Now, what I find VERY interesting is: I…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 07:29 PM
6

Supporting the 80/20 rule with the OkCupid study or this speed dating one is inherently flawed because it's focusing female attraction almost SOLELY upon looks. But even TRP acknowledges male SMV isn't exclusive to looks, so we are missing a big piece of the pie here. Not at all! I'm fully aware my "value" to my wife and other women is not ONLY in my appearance. Certainly when it comes to LTRs. I'm simply not looking to pair off with a woman that is nonchalant about settling on the looks side fo…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 07:08 PM
3

Agreed! And this should be the very first thing a man starts doing when he finds RP. Not gonna lie, it took me a bit to figure that out myself.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 06:51 PM
2

See this fascinates me. So you can see an objectively "hot" man but feel no attraction for him? Like, not even a pull to "hit that?" I really do need some type of connection before I get physical with a woman, however that does NOT mean I haven't decided if I'd have sex with her based on her appearance from the gate. Like, I can tell if I'd be willing to have sex with a woman up front PROVIDED it turns out I connect with her. In fact, I wouldn't bother chatting a woman up if I wasn't already sex…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 06:45 PM
3

If a guy can't get laid, that is HIS problem, not society's problem. Its "societies" problem if the current environment is such that it produces such men in volume. We can debate about the volume, but it appears to be growing.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 06:39 PM
3

ROFL! Here's the problem. If you came to me directly and said "Sard, I can't figure out why I strike out with the ladies so much!" I could help you dig into your own particular issues and work them out. RP is MANY men showing up to say that, and they don't all have the same problems. However, they all share the same desire, to be better with women, and in that commonality they band together. Thing is, what worked for me may not work for you, or Tom, or Jim. And if Tom and/or Jim are a random nam…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 06:37 PM
2

Truth be told? I just want everyone to be honest about this shit. Problem is, when it comes to sex, it seems many of us aren't even honest with ourselves, so it becomes difficult to be honest with others.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 06:34 PM
1

Roissy was one of the "old guard" of the 'sphere I didn't like nor read. Roosh either. Personal preferences and all that.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 06:32 PM
4

Ppl who aren't getting what they want need to take a good hard look at themselves not whine about "problems in the SMP". Many of us have, and found RP as the solution. And were then told we were horrible people because of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 06:30 PM
1

But I don't think of myself as settling because other factors are far more important to my overall attraction. Surely, and this is normal for all LTR/marriages. However, what if something happened and your hubby lost one or several of those "other" factors? Perhaps laid off of work for an extended period? See, I firmly agree that the woman I'm married to should absolutely like me as a person, outside of ANY "attraction" she feels for me. Some of those qualities may also add to my overall attract…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 06:24 PM
2

Yes, betas like me. seconded.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 06:18 PM
5

If I use my own failed marriage as a guide I come to this conclusion. My ex did not leave ONLY because I wasn't attractive. Not by a long shot. I had plenty of issues other than how I looked. However, had I looked much better, I suspect my ex would have had more incentive to work with me on those issues rather than leave and look for something new. I can tell you she started sniffing around several months after our split and after I'd starting fixing my shit. But that's probably as much to do wi…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 06:07 PM
2

Plus, why the fuck would I reach higher if this is my looks match, that would just make me miserable that he might leave me. To me the sweet spot here is between "settled on looks" and "so hot he might leave at any moment" for a marriage. Leaning towards "so hot" if at all possible.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 05:38 PM
6

How many deadbedroom posts can you read with the exact same plot without catching on. I actually lived it.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 05:36 PM
1

Yep. When I full smile my face looks all chubby and shit. I lose the cheek/chin definition.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 05:36 PM
1

The ones that look "charming" in their pictures do :P
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 05:35 PM
2

How do you explain that? In a general sense? Women are far more likely to "settle" on looks than men. The thing is: I don't see that as a good thing necessarily.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 05:34 PM
2

Do they just not have any experience with women's violence? None. Women in my extended family may have been nagging bitches, but not a single one would have EVER raised their hand to their husband. These were marriage 1.0 relationships, and as much as I was told to NEVER hit a woman, I'm fairly sure every one of those old men would have backhanded their wife if she got physical with him. That being said? I've heard stories of my uncle and aunt. He was a serial cheater, and he made some comment i…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 05:27 PM
3

Is it possible? Yes. Is it likely? Yeah I think it might be. Does this represent me? HELL YES. Compared to my male friends (the ones I know well enough to discuss this stuff) I'm an absolute horn dog. For a 46 year old, doubly so in my limited pool of experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 05:14 PM
8

I could personally write you some reports about how much I enjoy the company of my wife, but TRP field reports aren't for that I have said many different ways many different times here how I "enjoy the company of my wife" but that doesn't matter because I ALSO want her to be sexually into me, and it seems that takes precedence over the rest to BP. Yeah, I'm a dick because a solid sex life is more important to me than compatibility in their eyes. Sorry to say, but lack of hot monkey sex IS a comp…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 05:11 PM
3

Women in my family growing up did not read romance novels, at least not in our house. It was considered "smut" just like porn and thus not allowed. I know beyond all doubt my mother reads them now, and they probably did then and kept it secret, but there's that. The idea that men are supposed to have their shit together, be a bit badass when necessary, stay in shape, and not be a total doormat is pretty much omnipresent in our culture, from romance novel covers to James Bond movies. And in each …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 05:04 PM
1

When I was young, I was told NEVER, under ANY circumstances was I to hit a girl/woman. IN fact, I was honestly told that if ever attacked by a woman, I should do all I can to minimize the damage and wait for another woman to pull her off me. Why? Because a "man" NEVER hits a woman. And that is the tip of the iceberg on the "traditional" teaching I was given. Not abusive, at least in the classic sense of the word But, my family was religious when I was young, so it was VERY MUCH "it isn't your pl…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 04:54 PM
2

Oh yeah! And there's always advice on adding such pics to a profile. But just about everyone expects a semi-pro "head shot" or something, and I've never in my entire life taken one of those that look authentic. At all. My wife? Fuck. Just say "smile" and she looks as genuine as a certified diamond. How the HELL do people do that?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 04:51 PM
1

I understand, but that means a lot of nuance is lost as well, and we CONSTANTLY get accused of lacking nuance.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 04:49 PM
5

Now THAT is a very interesting question! I've said many times I have no desire to be "Chad" nor do I try to live up to any other person's ideal of "alpha" or "beta", so when I think of myself I don't really put one of those labels on it. If I had to, I'd say I lean Sigma now, but I also feel like that is attempting to wax myself an awful lot as well, and I don't like to toot my own horn. To others? Probably beta for so many reasons its not worth listing. Some will say no matter what since I'm ma…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 04:48 PM
9

They fail at "don't be unattractive". 75% of my issues were firmly in this wheel house.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 04:43 PM
5

It's like a bunch of guys struggling to reverse engineer a moderately popular female fantasy Being as many of us are looking for "fantasy level" responses from women, does that surprise you?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 04:39 PM
3

It appears you and I aren't so different in most respects. The primary reason I flair red is my PoV comes from that side of the fence, but that does NOT mean I in any way agree with 100% of what the 'sphere or TRP presents.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 04:36 PM
3

what sucks is it isn't about my gut. Don't get me wrong, I'm not sporting a six pack by any leap of the imagination. But what I wear helps a lot in that respect. Truly, its that I simply do not know how to "act" for a camera. I don't walk around smiling all day, so attempting to do so for a picture just always looks fake as shit, hence dorky. I prefer what Atlas calls the Jerk Smirk, and indeed THAT is how I tend to walk around when in a good mood. Problem is in pictures, it looks awfully condes…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 04:33 PM
2

I once asked my oldest (who is now 22) to do that, and she had me trying to move my head into some of the most uncomfortable positions known to man. I guess that's how you get the perfect "duck face" angle. :P
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 04:30 PM
3

Even if we assume that's true, it doesn't support your claim that it's pointless for any man who is not an 8+ to pursue women. That wasn't me but I hopped into the convo so easy to mistake. Personally? I'd say a guy that is sub-8 just needs to wrap his head around the fact that he may just end up with a woman 1 or 2 points 'below' him in raw attractiveness. And in fact, its likely he could "land" a woman pretty damn equal to him in the looks dept. but then he runs the risk of falling short of th…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 04:29 PM
3

DING DING DING! It gets even crazier the deeper you go. And this is why many of us "old timers" keep asking if you've "read the material". The problems is, in my mind the "material" is the older stuff.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 04:21 PM
2

but I don't get it, I thought it was alpha to not give a fuck... In reality there are many different types of "alpha", and Sigma would be one of the sub-types.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 04:18 PM
5

I'm not a male model, but I'm not bad looking. But seriously, for the fucking life of me I can NOT take a good picture on purpose. If I know someone is taking a pic of me, I'm going to look like a dork. Especially if they tell me to "smile for the camera!" :( My best pics in existence are all candid/action shots of me doing something else so I'm not noticing that someone is taking a picture. So yeah, I can't imagine how I'd go about getting "quality" pics for a dating profile. LOL
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 04:16 PM
3

Women eventually realize they can't snag the hotter guys for marriage and "settle" with a nice, steady, supportive beta that isn't nearly as hot. But that's OK because he is "perfect in every other way" and all that.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 04:10 PM
2

The rabbit hole is very, very deep indeed.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 04:00 PM
6

Oh Lord... :P Most of the extended "scale" I know is from Vox Day's 'sphere page. Gamma is essentially a Sigma without the "alpha" traits. If Sigma is an "alpha" that simply does NOT CARE at all about the rules, then a Gamma is an Omega with a similar PoV. I think Gamma is about the worst a guy can be, but in many cases his issues are primarily in his head. I probably leaned toward Gamma in the past. http://alphagameplan.blogspot.com/2011/03/socio-sexual-hierarchy.html Shit, I forget there's a D…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 03:52 PM
1

And Gammas. :P
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 03:43 PM
10

Stellar write up and I 100% agree. Of course this gets complicated because some "factions" of RP only recognize the Alpha and the Beta, while others add in the Omega, the Sigma, and the Gamma. All rating aside, yes RP is mostly for guys that aren't losing on all fronts, but are missing some key ingredients to be optimally attractive. In many/most cases, they are actually their own worst enemies by behaving in ways that are killing the "natural attraction" they already have, which is why in many …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 03:42 PM
1

I will take whatever personally as I wish thank you very much. I meant don't take what I say so personally, but do as you will.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 03:30 PM
1

But lurkers be lurking! I'll work on not jumping the shark with you, but DO realize sometimes what I write in response isn't 100% for the original comment as much as continuing the general conversation. Don't take it personally.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 03:10 PM
7

Most men don't necessarily care about being "unfeminist", but a lot of men are ashamed of their darker sexual fantasises This right here. Once upon a time, I considered it "sexist" and "misogynistic" of me that I wanted to smack my mates ass while having sex. Using ties or rope? That would have been downright torture in my book. These days we have a small collection of accessories to assist with such endeavors. The old me would be horrified at what I do with my wife today. And? These desires wer…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 02:13 PM
5

People call other people a jerk or an ass hole for simple having regular boundaries and going for what you want. True, which makes things awfully confusing for some people that take things literally. Most of the time when I call myself an "asshole" these days, I really am just keeping solid boundaries. But, my former frame of mind told me that holding solid boundaries against my wife made me an "asshole", and even now that I know better, THAT is the concept stuck in my head. Easy example of "bad…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 02:00 PM
7

Most women pair bond with guys who have similar looks. And you didn't click on the links. Sure and for many its AFTER Chad passed on them for something "serious".
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 01:58 PM
5

Tell that to all the awesome fat dads out there. How many of those awesome fat dads are in dead bedrooms? Stop assuming just because a man got married and had kids that he is in any way a 'success'. He very well could have been her consolation prize, with the level of care and attention that comes with that role. Unless I hear it from his lips, I will not assume that things are peachy for him.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 01:55 PM
3

Rape? Yep
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 01:44 PM
1

So you're essentially agreeing with me then that it can be harmful? When have I EVER said RP is totally harmless?! Holy shit on toast! Look, RP is as much a "all guns are loaded" scenario as RP claims all women are! Maybe don't question me for 5 comments when I say that then. I'm obviously not talking about unharmful use of core concepts. Every single time I see a BP accuse "RP" of being evil/harmful I'm gonna be piping in, because that is an incorrect statement. How some men USE it is the probl…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/16 01:39 PM
1

Don't pretend that TRP isn't perfectly accepting of treating women like shit. TRP is perfectly accepting of treating women in any way required for the desired result. MEN that use RP knowledge are the ones that apply a moralistic view to those actions. You know I personally am not a "means justifies the ends" type of person in most cases, but at its core RP is exactly that. how its applied makes all the difference from a moral point of view. And just because I'm red does not mean I don't agree w…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 09:26 PM
3

Sure, but no one says ALL alphas do ALL this exactly. And no one says "just do exactly this and you'll be an alpha". The claim is you'll be more alpha-like, which isn't the same thing at all. There's enough variability in what constitutes "alpha" to allow sub-types if you want to get really into it. Do you believe there are "benevolent alphas"? Men that are alpha but aren't necessarily looking for notches? I'd say most of the "alphas" in the OP would fall somewhere along that path in my estimati…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 09:09 PM
1

Which is exactly my point. People should be able to leave it. That part falls into the "can't make if fair" side of the equation. Unless you can go into the jungle and live a life of solitude, you are still in play
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 08:59 PM
3

Which includes a lot of men who don't practice dread game, holding frame, ignoring women to get their attention, negging, treating women like plates, etc. Who ever said all alphas do all or even any of that? You do understand that much of those are coping mechanisms for guys working on increasing their value in one way or another, right? If I'm a rock star, I don't need to do ANYTHING to increase my value. I'm already at the top, and people already at the top tend to often be very chill about it…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 08:56 PM
5

IME bassists do fine, they just aren't as flashy about it. But there are women that LOVE a man with good rhythm, and that is the bassist AND the drummers bread and butter. Although drummers get the added bonus of banging the shit out of something aggressively, and that attracts a whole other audience. ;-)
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 08:46 PM
1

Apologies for the confusion. Its on my end surely.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 07:49 PM
1

But I think that you may have missed out on a few opportunities to make more friends if you judge too soon. I don't doubt that in the least. Its a risk I take to mitigate risk, as screwed up as that logic seems.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 07:47 PM
1

As Rollo puts (and I'm summarizing) you can sit out the game, but you can never fully leave it. As long as you are breathing you ARE playing to an extent. You can only control your level of participation.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 06:59 PM
1

You must be a patient person, but if someone says to you that they can't be assertive with a partner then you can't help them, really. I fully agree. However, once upon a time I helped myself so what I'm really trying to do is generate some motivation for others. Maybe I suck at it. LOL Anyone can be assertive, and if you can't do that then you're better off not having relationships with women. I assume you meant everyone can't be assertive in that sentence? If that assumption is correct, I'd co…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 06:52 PM
1

But of course, you're not interested in making this fair. There is no way to make this "fair" period. It can't be done. It is a competition, and one with few rules and controls. But ya know what? You're right. You do what you feel is best for you. Its really the only course of action any of us has.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 06:41 PM
1

ou don't accomplish anything other than dying. You're going to die anyway, why not go out trying as hard as you can? lol. that's pussy-begging. Call it what you want but I'm getting laid. A man doesn't succeed unless he's fucking at least 3 hot young girls a week without paying for it. Somehow I doubt the red pillers are doing this. That's because you measure success by notch count. I don't. My litmus test is simple: is that individual man happy with his lot in life? If yes = success. If no = fa…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 05:12 PM
2

If it had been there when I was mid-20's, well then maybe it could've helped me. I found RP at 38 years old when my now ex-wife walked out my door. Its never too late, but sure you have to realize your best chances are probably in the past. So what? I still have years left to live, and I'm not going to waste too much of it crying over spilled milk. Some of it? Yep, but as time passes, less and less of my mental energy goes anywhere near what "could have been". I'll never be 'dominant' enough to …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 05:07 PM
1

And why is that acceptance solely his own responsibility? Given how much ridicule and outright hatred society shows towards sexually and romantically unsuccessful men, and how overvalued sex is in our culture, it's no surprise that people who opt out would still be conflicted. Acceptance is his responsibility because no one else can take responsibility for your own choices. Sure, maybe you weren't left with many options, but you still chose one. It's absolutely unrealistic to demand that someone…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 04:51 PM
2

wouldn't it make more sense to look at the reasons, instead of kneejerk criticizing them? I know many of the reasons, and its beyond the scope of individual men to change them. Best bet for most is to find a way to make the best of it. If some guy doesn't like any of the frankly rather short and unvaried list of "attractive" hobbies and activities, and if realistically, even at his most attractive his best bet in romance is some fat chick who will most likely resent him for not being one of the …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 04:22 PM
2

It is, and its intentional. It catches the attention. Most of us RP guys that have been around will tell you that 80/20 as a number is a guess, but the principle still applies. And yes, that principle includes the fact that no man is attractive to every woman alive. And yes, it takes into account things like "situational alphas" and/or guys in niche markets. In fact, if you can't be one of the top 20% overall? Your best shot as a man is get into the top 20% of some niche and catch all you can ou…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 03:58 PM
1

it would be pretty dumb of me to keep trying X. So try Y. Or Z. Maybe start with numbers instead of letters. RP isn't a "one-size-fits-all" kinda thing. If it doesn't work for you, try something else. But if you really, truly want sex/LTR/a woman in your life, keep trying until you succeed or die trying. If you really do NOT want one that badly, then stop trying and move along. And its perfectly OK to simply state that "women aren't worth it" and then go do your own thing. However, if that is tr…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 02:23 PM
3

Ok but if the message is the same, why is the reaction different? Is it just critical mass and RP has reached a volume where more of its members are stunted than actually improving? Did all the men who could be "saved" leave at once? Why are more men apparently giving up now than in the past? Shit maybe it was always going to end up this way.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 08:42 AM
4

The first has my sympathy but failure is no reason to quit. The second? Those who don't believe they can succeed never will. And I have no sympathy for them for that reason. I do get it, but remember a facet of RP is confidence, and even when failure is all you've managed, confidence even if it's unwarranted plays a role. I mean, what's the alternative? To admit some men may never find happiness? It's true. To confess that some men may never find a rewarding relationship of any kind with a woman…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 08:25 AM
2

I'm a troll-beast of epic proportions that can only venture outside under the darkness of the new moon. But I'm really cocky and confident so I make up for it with game of course!
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 08:11 AM
1

Sure, but do you think he might be able to make the bottom 40 with some effort? Is it worth the effort for the payoff? He may or may not think so I suppose. See the issue here is the obsession with the "top 20%". All men can't be in the top 20, and they don't need to be unless their goal is a notch count to rival Gene Simmons. The goal is to just be the best person you can be now, and improve on that later. Rinse and repeat until you die or get old and lose your mind. If that eventually gets you…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 08:07 AM
6

Brother it was demoralizing for me when I first found it. It's SUPPOSED to be that way. Most men need a firm kick to the ass before they take notice of their own shortcomings and bullshit. And even then he really won't do a damn thing until he finds the motivation himself. For me, anger worked for early motivation, and that anger was largely driven by RP core principles. When I read about 80/20, hypergamy, etc my first instinct was denial. "These guys are fucking crazy!" Then it was creeping hor…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 07:59 AM
8

Little boners are easy to please. The big ones take two hands to operate, but little ones only require a few fingers and a thumb! You'd have a whole hand free to keep posting here!
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 07:21 AM
15

So it's slim pickings It's slim pickings for most of us. would be a lot better off than I am now. I would say 75-80% of women are just not going to go for me whatever I do. And then 50% of the remainder, at least, are tied down. Math aside, the idea of RP for most men is to increase their odds, not bankrupt the casino. If your pool of candidates is 2% of all women you'll meet this year, don't you think your chances would be better if your were a bit more attractive to them? Maybe that could get …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 07:07 AM
5

Marriage at least implies the man's reaponsibility for the child by default. So at least a woman that married the baby daddy did all she could legally to ensure she didn't end up alone, and marriage certainly makes leaving more difficult for him. In short if she wasn't married prior to getting pregnant, she failed at due diligence: secure resources first.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 06:43 AM
6

75% being generous that the remaining 25% are widows and/or the victim of Bad Men(TM) who divorce her after the birth. Oh, they weren't married? She's in the 75% then.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 05:16 AM
1

Like if a woman is religious I can assume she's not compatible with my POV on faith? Or if she proudly advertises her feminist credentials along with the membership card? Yeah I can tell if she's involved in slut marches, we aren't gonna get along. There are any number of ways to group people. At a high level like that it's mostly about core issue/ideal incompatibilities than individual traits. Or overall preferences. (Fat/skinny, blond/brunette, etc).
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 05:08 AM
1

You asked me what I could figure out without talking to her. I answered. So you want higher level? Too short. Too tall. Too fat. Too skinny. Too "high maintenance".
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 03:53 AM
3

What even can you filter before you've spoken to women? How she's dressed and presents herself. If she acts slutty, her sexual history is irrelevant. She could be a virgin and she'd still be acting slutty. If I'm somewhere I can watch her interact with others I can get a feel for her personality (touchy. Bubbly. Reserved. Etc.) And I also tend to look at how they move. I don't know exactly how to describe this other than to say how a woman moves changes my overall level of attraction for her. I'…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 02:09 AM
3

Who the hell starts at sexual history? That wouldn't come into play until after I've chatted a woman up enough to be interested. In other words a woman's sexual past doesn't come into play until after she's already passed several of my filters and I'm at the "vetting" stage.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 01:51 AM
2

Ultimately, though? You can systemise all you want but you can never defeat the unpredictability of human beings no matter what you do. The bane of my existence! People simply refuse to stay in the boxes I put them into.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 01:34 AM
3

Or you can withhold judgment until you know the individual you're talking about and then tailor your judgment of them towards who they actually are as a person rather than who they're statistically likely to be. Why? To what end does "withholding judgment" in this context benefit me? Not trying to be a prick, I'm asking because I've seen this many times over and I don't get it. What happens if my judgment is wrong? I don't talk to one particular person. So what? Do people get offended because I …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 01:27 AM
3

If there is a lot of variance within a given group, the second method is considerably less reliable. So it's a bad way to evaluate them. Why? There are far too many women on the planet for me to evaluate all of them individually in a lifetime. Seems efficient for me to break "all women" into smaller groups many times over before I ever pick one and introduce myself.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/16 01:10 AM
1

That's more likely due to my crappy social skills. LOL Apologies. I actually liked your analogy a lot, but literally my first thought when reading it was "but the eel isn't looking to be made into a meal" and found it slightly amusing. I should know most people don't find what I do amusing by now.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 08:58 PM
3

I'm the type of personality that simply does not like the "unknown", and I will generally do everything I can to make the "unknown" the "known", even if it means forming models on faulty data. I can always adjust the model as new data presents itself, but if I have no model to start with everything I do will be "random", and I'll have no way to correlate success/failure to any particular action. Its no different than solving a broken computer system. You start with the knowledge that its down, a…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 07:28 PM
5

How does it benefit men? Sure it benefits some individual men. Well here you're veering off a bit. MRA/MGTOW types are probably more concerned with "men" in a general sense, but at least I tend to view the actual concepts presented as a solution to be a VERY INDIVIDUAL thing, which is to say I don't believe the goal of Red Pill (the theory) is to improve all men's lot in life. It is to give individual men the tools they need to make THEIR OWN life better. So really, you are complaining about the…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 07:20 PM
3

Most women don't like me. But the ones who do like me fucking love me. This is pretty much exactly where I've landed, and I'm totally good with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 07:08 PM
3

That's why its there. I get it, and to an extent I "feel" it (which is to say I understand the PoV), but not to that extreme. I suspect most people that want to drive a sports car actually buy a sports car, but there is the concept of "rental cars" and by that I mean its often said people drive them like they "stole" them. And I suppose you could say that a woman that a man has no intent on pairing off with but fully intends to have sex with is a lot like a "rental car", but that's only going to…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 07:06 PM
6

Don't make her think of her exes, make her question them So. Much. Fucking. THIS! Problem is, a man has to find his own sense of worth first, and its apparent many of us suffer from that lack of knowledge early on.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 06:54 PM
5

For example if you chose a Lambo because you like speed and style and noise, you won't get jealous when you see a pickup truck that can transport a couch. That's all fine and well until I buy a used Pickup that the last owner drove like a Lambo, because I'm the one stuck with the repair bills. /s
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 06:52 PM
5

Be a fucking badass in life, and the woman problem will take care of itself... I need to read your responses before I post. You say in one sentence what takes me three paragraphs. :P
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 06:48 PM
5

Implying I want to be some alfalfa fuck who spends evey waking moment trying to make themselves good enough for women's crazy standards Hold up a second. Most "alphas" don't spend "every waking moment" trying to "make themselves good enough for women's crazy standards" either though. Those men are just who they are, and "women" tend to see that as attractive. Now an RP man can become something like that, but my guess is he will never have the same exact attitude as the guy who "just got it", bec…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 06:46 PM
5

Fair enough. I still can't wrap my head around the idea of having sex with a "friend", so in reality it appears I simply do NOT understand the vast majority of sex being had by humans. The moment we get to inserting tab A into slot B is the moment I'm past being just "friends", so if I value that friendship in any way sex is the LAST thing I'd be thinking about. I realize there is a vast difference between a ONS from a bar/club and a ONS with someone you've known for some time to many people, bu…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 06:30 PM
1

Why do you have to try and find a way to one-up me when I make a good point? Is that really relevant? You can just say, "good point." I'm really not trying to "one up" anyone here. I'm just pointing out that I get your "eel" analogy, but if a guy is only looking for a bang, he doesn't care if she likes him or not. It doesn't matter if she thinks he totally sucks tomorrow morning as long as he got the bang. It may matter to the next guy she gets with though. I dunno man, I don't think you have. I…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 06:21 PM
3

That was my original intent with the NARPALT, but it seems many take that as something else entirely. I get it, to some that is a direct challenge. LOL
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 06:09 PM
4

they take that shit laughably seriously. What sex?! So I"m a moron because I take an act which is THE CLOSEST you can ever be with another human being other than actually being born (meaning as a man you are INSIDE another human and as a woman you have someone else INSIDE your body) seriously? An act that can lead to a pregnancy, or any number of diseases? Yeah, I must be a moron because I take that shit seriously. :P
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 05:55 PM
13

I'm realizing part of my problem here at PPD is I'm "arguing" the 'sphere 1.0, while most folks here are arguing against RP 2.0. I can't relate to the "new" version much, although I still see some of the core concepts being discussed. So much so that I'm beginning to wonder if I should change the color of my flair. NOT because I don't still believe in RP principles, but because what passes as RP here at PPD is not the same to me at all. And really I chose a Red flair based on that, NOT on any ag…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 05:49 PM
1

It's the same problem. I think you're making excuses. Not at all, I agree with you. I simply didn't start to interact with more "mentally stable" women until I got older and more advanced in my career, which is to say when I was younger and looking for the "wife of my life", I wasn't rubbing elbows with college educated women. Hell, I'm still not married to one with a degree, although she is a little certed up. So not an excuse. I'm pointing out that for some men in some environments "mentally s…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 05:43 PM
1

People will try eel when they're in China even though they find it disgusting. Because of the novelty. Being a bizarre man will not create the same effect. The difference here is: the eel probably isn't hoping to get eaten, but I get your point. I think 2 is a much more likely explanation. OK first of all: why all the lying about how great casual sex/ONS are then? If they suck, why are women telling OTHER women they are great? Second, I've said many times that your scenario #2 probably does incl…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 05:37 PM
1

If you can't attract mentally stable women, it's because you have a deficiency in your own personality. I had to find "mentally stable" women before I could make that attempt. I'm still not sure they exist entirely, but certainly some are better than others. Of course, I sometimes think sentience is actually a manifestation of insanity in humans.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 05:27 PM
1

Most men have experience with the second type of woman. Yep this exactly. Overall most women I've know even to this day tend to be more concerned with what is in the "present" than a man's past record. And with those types of women, there is no room for a "down period", because the moment her man is down, he starts losing attraction in her eyes, and that tends to drop quickly to zero.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 05:20 PM
3

I couldn't deal with the fact that she was a virgin... Kinda funny. My second LTR mate was a virgin when we met, and I really did NOT want to be her first at the time. Mostly because: a. I didn't want to hurt her b. even way back then I already had the inkling that "the first" wasn't going to last. But, we were together almost 5 years total so I "took the plunge" and it turned out that to this day, she is probably the second best woman I've been with sexually. (admittedly that's out of 4 total s…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 05:03 PM
1

raises hand I don't know about other men, but I'm getting the sex life I want, thanks.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 04:52 PM
1

What they've actually meant by bond is "form stable relationships" I still disagree because of course they're totally wrong, but at least I understand what I disagree with now Yeah when I say it, I mean this. As to if we are wrong or not? I honestly don't know, but I prefer to hedge my bets all the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 04:43 PM
1

Men say "don't stick your dick in crazy" but other men still do it. All the time, despite evidence that it'll end badly anyway. I agree. :( The fact they only do it once or twice in their entire life says a lot more about how much they enjoy it. Of the men I know that have gone this route in the past? They all to a man said they LOVED the sex, but couldn't handle the rest. All things being equal, they'd prefer the sex of "crazy", but can't have a life with it. I'd say they enjoy it "in the momen…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 04:41 PM
2

Apparently terps believe in love at first sight and if you have to spend time with a person to figure out if you like them you're a horrible failure. Nah. I'm just looking for a woman that generally gets to know a guy before she jumps on his lap. So I get that it takes time to "get to know" someone just fine, I'm at a loss as to why people keep boffing each other before they know if they like them or not. In addition, many RP men (myself included if I'm honest) are very wary of the "grow on them…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 04:29 PM
4

i didnt LOVE or like every man i slept with For some guys THAT is plenty enough reason to avoid. Not a dig at you, but for real I have zero interest in being with a woman that ever had sex with a man she didn't even at least like. That is a very clear difference of PoV on sexuality, so much so that I don't see any way to even bridge it. Like, a woman could have an N of one, and if I heard it was with a dude she didn't like but banged anyway, I'd be out. So I suppose in this case it wouldn't be a…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 04:24 PM
1

That's certainly how most women describe their one night stand experiences. Most of them regret it. And they say so to other women, who STILL insist on trying anyway. ;-) At any rate, if a man wants to be many women's "exception", RP seems a good path to it, does it not? If he doesn't care about a LTR, what difference does it make that the women he's having sex with tonight would?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 04:14 PM
3

Unless she's married to me? Nope.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 04:12 PM
2

For real. Even wanting to know somewhat about a woman's sexual past, I have NO DESIRE to know that kind of detail.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 04:11 PM
1

Unless she is literally rekt, why not? (and by rekt I mean: when we have sex its like tossing a hot dog down a hallway. I don't want to have to wiggle my hips to bang on the sidewall to get some friction!) of course, that's assuming she was in some kind of relationship with said well hung man. If not? Depends on a lot of variables, but not the size of his dick.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 04:06 PM
1

It's also wrong. The vast majority of women don't have casual sex. We've discussed here that many/most women have at least one casual encounter in their lifetime, right? If you are the type of guy that women use for ONS, you can rack up a substantial notch count simply by being a woman's ONLY "exception".
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 03:56 PM
2

Women don't care about looks all that much. When its time to settle down? Sure. Sure being ugly is bad and being hot is good, but the majority of men are just normal and for them personality is what makes the difference. Personality is great for long term compatibility of course. And sure, any woman I'm going to attempt to spend the rest of my life with should be compatible. However, this does not speak at all to how sexually attracted to me she is, and that is the exact point. Its great she's d…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 03:43 PM
2

The interesting bit of the okcupid study was that men and women messaged in completely different ways. Men mostly messaged 10s, women all across the board. Which means what exactly? That women often aren't too thrilled about the men they are chatting up on the looks side of the fence, but go ahead anyway because something is better than nothing?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 03:00 PM
2

46 :p
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/16 01:45 PM
1

Priorities. If I died young, I wanted the important stuff done first. If I lived long enough, I'd enjoy the fruits of that labor and have fun. I'm almost there!
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/16 04:05 PM
3

It's not about the sex. It's about the behavior surrounding it.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/16 04:03 PM
1

Dread doesn't make you an asshole, its just that when you have to purposely create dread it sounds very fucked up Wait a second. You DO realize that RP is mostly for men that have lacked the ability to be attractive in the past, right? Men like that need to be reminded that it's important to just BE attractive, and not just to your GF/wife. So when you use the word "purposely" it's misleading. I agree a man hitting on other women to intentionally cause jealousy in his wife is kinda fucked up. (H…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/16 03:59 PM
1

The third ones just take listen and live according to their interpretation, mixed with their real-life experiences. In everyday life? Absolutely! Here? See my flair.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/16 03:43 PM
4

It doesn't help that many of us call it "dread game". Dread is a part of game overall, but it's not a fake it til you make it part. Any man intentionally bluffing with dread is playing with dynamite, and he'll be lucky if he only loses a hand. My point being I get the impression many BPers here view dread as me hitting on other women in front of my wife to make her jealous. No amount of "bad behavior" from her would push me to do so, because frankly if that is the condition of our relationship, …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/16 03:35 PM
1

ok heathenism apparently is a real religion based on old Pagan beliefs? So a "heathen" is no longer someone that simply doesn't practice Christian beliefs anymore? In that case, the sexual revolution normalized debauchery.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/16 03:11 PM
1

The sexual revolution normalized heathenism.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/16 03:03 PM
4

I doubt there were as many real "dead bedrooms" when wives were considered "property". Wether she wanted it or not, she was likely having sex with her hubby back in the day. Not saying that was a good thing, but it's important to note that once upon a time marital rape wasn't something a woman could actually expect the law to help her with, because it wasn't illegal at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/16 03:00 PM
1

Thank god. I was starting to worry "doesn't gossip" was another thing I was odd about for a minute. My wife tries to tell me about my own families drama and I occasionally notice. Why do I care if my cousin is pissed at her hubby? And the reason I don't give my wife "the scoop" on someone in our circle is because I don't consider it info worth passing on. chances are I forgot until the moment my wife found out and tried to fill me in, and I don't need to say I already know because she can see it…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/16 04:42 AM
2

If I like a woman enough to do friend shit with her, think she's hot, and we are having sex, I can't imagine how I would avoid "catching feelings". It would take monumental effort on my part not to. And that's fully knowing what was going on while it was happening. Which is exactly why I don't get that physical with a woman until I know she's interested in a LTR. Because if we have sex, and I already like her, I'm gonna want to want to keep her around.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/16 04:22 AM
3

Making kids is easy. Raising responsible, functional, level headed adults is an entirely different thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/16 04:02 AM
1

Not even close. "All she had going for her" implies she had no positive traits other than vagina. I'm saying I've known women that had good traits but still relied too much on "vagina" and then found it difficult to turn that down/off (as in perhaps during a relationship) and still get attention. They never learned to use those other traits to generate positive reactions in men because being "hot" worked plenty well enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/16 03:58 AM
2

Many are INTJ personalities lacking positive masculine role models - like it or not, you represent many elements of positive masculinity, from that perspective I appreciate the the kind words, but I really don't see myself as any kind of role model. And I wouldn't be comfortable in that role, when I know beyond all doubt I'm still figuring much of this out myself. If I serve those men any purpose, I hope it's an example and/or warning, and a lot of the reason I post is in the hopes any of them l…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 10:13 PM
1

It was interesting that, when she was pregnant, she both didn't want to be the center of attention but also didn't have the energy for it. So she actually sat on the sidelines when we were out, had more 'intimate' conversations, and ended up holding up pretty well though the evening. This is how I behaved in most social situations in the past. I was the guy sitting at the table "guarding purses" (although I never watched them LOL) and chatting with one or two people that wander over and sit for …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 09:40 PM
4

What I absolutely can't get past is this idea that women have no loyalty or honour. What a savage and distorted way to think about half the human race. There's a lot of nuance there though. In my opinion, "people" are often not loyal or honorable. The thing is, I grew up knowing men were often shitty, but had the impression that only "bad" or "broken" women were that way. Turns out we are all broken in one way or many, and women are sometimes just as disloyal and dishonorable as shitty men. Yes,…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 09:12 PM
5

I'd love to be able to answer that, but I really can't. To be blunt: I'm finding in many ways my idea of RP and what currently exists as RP in some area's of the 'sphere aren't the same. I'm not looking at or care at all about fractions within RP, but I can't relate to much of what I see on TRP the few times I've looked. (and to be fair, I was never a member of the TRP sub and found my way to RP well before it existed.) So to your point? I honestly don't know, but it wouldn't surprise me to find…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 08:52 PM
3

You should tell us all how you REALLY feel! :P
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 08:37 PM
4

I just saw a thread on askMRP about how to build "frame" into marriage vows. Not only is it absolutely possible, its essential if you intend to actually stick to your word AND keep the option of leaving available to you. If you say "til death do us part", and you decide you want out later? You're breaking your word. Write your own vows so at least you have the choice of whatever oath you are making.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 08:36 PM
7

TRP has taught me 1,000 ways NOT to be a good romantic partner which is very helpful when you are trying to find out how to be a good one. RP showed me lots of ways to be a hotter husband. Far as I can tell, at least my wife sees that as a "good" thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 08:32 PM
2

I can see how RP would contribute to that shift. But I don't think it's inherently wrong to view sex as something sacred. I'm not claiming there is anything wrong with it. However, that would only actually be "good" for me if most women I'm likely to partner up with feel the same. And outside of religious circles, (where I'm not welcome or interested in being) there aren't many women with this attitude. Or at last not many I've ever come into contact with. So in essence, I've had to modify my "s…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 08:21 PM
1

Also note that the men in my social circle all mostly in their 30's to 40's, so they were youths in another age. ;-) In addition? I don't have many friends with "checkered pasts" because I normally don't run in those circles. This man in particular was the bass player in my last band. Known him for several decades now and he's truly my best buddy, but DAMN I have serious philosophical differences with him on sexuality. I mean, I distinctly remember the "coke whore" he was banging for about a yea…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 06:39 PM
6

Just chill and have fun, that's what our society is about now. Problem is that really isn't what I want my life to be about. Sure, I like having fun, but honestly I'd prefer to put more of my effort into things I feel will have longer lasting results than an hour of messing around more often than not. Having fun feels great, but after its over there's usually nothing left to show of it but memories. I'm looking at doing things that will still be in play long after I'm gone, which is a primary pu…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 06:19 PM
2

IIRC, you are a INTJ, correct? Yep. My wife is almost always the life of the party, but she often finds ways to be the life of the party without actually doing much. That's why, for years, she loved being a go-go dancer. She could feel like she was with everybody without actually having to be with them, lol... Almost precisely the way I felt about doing live gigs back in the day. It was the perfect way for me to be a part of the action without actually having to engage with a single soul. And wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 06:01 PM
3

Saving yourself was your choice and it meant what it meant to you. Don't project that onto him. It's flat unfair. Yes, it is unfair. But to be frank, I've never found a way to be mentally "OK" with it all the same. Which is why I really just look for lower N women. It would cause friction, which would be 100% my fault, and that's not fair to her, or myself really. But in terms of changing my PoV on it? I've been in the 'sphere since 2011, and I still feel exactly the same way. Even knowing what …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 05:35 PM
2

So much this! Much of what I take and use from RP in my marriage is covered under what you wrote above. In short, I had to learn how to make sure my wife NEVER forgets I think she's hot shit. My error in the past was believing saying it was enough. Truth be told? From my limited experience, saying it instead of showing actually has the opposite effect in many cases. Saying it AND showing it seems to be working much better, but first I had to get comfortable with the showing part, outside the bed…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 05:19 PM
2

A lot of people (not just here, but in general) seem to misunderstand the intro/extro dichotomy. Yep this. I am often the "life of the party", but ONLY if the party consists of my close circle of friends. If its a mixed party (meaning lots of strangers around?) I never used to make a peep. However I absolutely can enjoy the environment from an "outside looking in" perspective, which is to say although I may be sitting in the corner with a few folks all night, doesn't mean I didn't enjoy seeing o…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 05:13 PM
2

Reads like her potential for sex was all she had going for her. Not exactly. It means she got most of her attention advertising sexually, and as such doesn't know how to go about getting that attention WITHOUT it.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 05:10 PM
1

It's possible for a woman to have sufficient social skills to get plenty of social attention from others even while in a relationship Depending on how she goes about getting that "social attention", her relationship partner may not be too keen on it. And for women that USED to get that attention being sexual, it certainly can be an issue. And if the term "attention whoring" comes up, there's a fair chance much of that attention was based on sexualization.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 05:09 PM
2

I fully agree. But it took me a LONG time to understand and accept that fact. And it really, truly sucks to meet someone you click with and run smack dab into this brick wall.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 04:54 PM
1

Maybe "popular girl" would have been more accurate. Yep! Like, I dunno... I guess it's a combination of my looks and personality that made me a sexual blank for most guys. What's extremely amusing to me is the quote above and everything that follows pretty well describes me as a youth as well. Of course, the real issue there being men are expected to "initiate", and that simply isn't my natural inclination with anyone, even women I find attractive. Further? Even though I was that way, I found my…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 04:48 PM
1

If it were only that simple.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 03:47 PM
1

I understand how this can affect someone, however one partner's sexual past, doesn't change the compatibility they have. No it doesn't, and that's the real bitch about it. Two people can be perfectly compatible but this issue is more than enough to cause strife all the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 03:45 PM
1

+1
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 03:40 PM
1

Nah. I managed to find a woman fairly close to "ideal", even though to be frank I'd given up on that anyway. However I genuinely feel badly for other men with a similar disposition. I have the benefit of being "old", which is to say there are still some women in my age bracket that kinda followed the more "traditional" path with only a few detours along the way. I don't suspect that's the case currently.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 03:32 PM
1

Why? I mean this in a very genuine way rather than disagreeing Because despite no longer being religious in any way, I still view sex as something that should be shared between people that care about each other past getting off. Its a personality trait/sexual PoV I'd honestly prefer my partner shared, but I'll fully admit its a rare one in the modern west. Which is why I say its not a dig on you or your choices, and really not a "dig" on the women you've been with past the fact that her attitude…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 03:23 PM
1

I wasn't implying you should I wasn't implying you should Maybe to some, but honestly, and don't take this personally man, my issue isn't them not being a virgin, its having sex with dudes like you. Again, NOT a dig on you or YOUR choices, but I suppose it is a dig on the choices the women that had sex with you made. shrug it is what it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 03:14 PM
2

I think this is a hot girl problem. Yes, but not necessarily the way you'd think. There are plenty of closer to average women going this route, mostly because they don't get the attention the HB8-10's do, so they "sexualize" themselves to get more, which means more men notice them, which means more men find them "hot", which means more sex... I'd suspect guys that generally stay in the 4-7 range of HBness when approaching have probably seen FAR more of this than Chad's and/or men that mostly tar…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 03:11 PM
2

Not an exclusive Feb, an ongoing sexual relationship that doesn't include commitment. So a FWB but with other sex partners on the side? I'd just call that the CC and be done with it. If its multiple FWB in a rotation? Same thing. Maybe the motivation is different, but I'd wager that type of woman's N is over my comfort level anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 03:02 PM
2

I get that, but what's the difference between an "exclusive FWB" and a relationship? If you aren't having sex with other people, you're committed to them already. What am I missing because honestly this makes zero sense to me at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 02:57 PM
3

Every slut was once a virgin and I can snuff out the virgin sluts like a dog. ROFL but women aren't a competition, right? See ladies? This is EXACTLY the attitude that gets guys "competing" over women and sometimes "obsessed" with female virginity. Not a dig at your comment, just find it amusing as hell that so often I see BP folks here complaining about "virgin obsession" and then there's this, which is totally true and I once knew a guy that LOVED to ferret out "good girls" to be the first on …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 02:55 PM
3

To me the only difference here is: intent. Some women ride the CC because they like sex, and want as much of it as they can get with who they want. Others ride the CC as a result of looking for validation and/or "something more". The result is still the same, a higher N. But honestly, the mindset BEHIND that N is probably more important than the actual number, and I've said as much many times over. The thing is, to me once a woman gets into double digit N, I'm less concerned about her mindset an…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 02:47 PM
3

In average couples it's not uncommon that the man has had a couple more sexual partners. See this is another one of those local environment things I think. Of course I don't know the sexual details of every couple I know, but of the few I do? In most cases the wife indeed has a higher count, although none of them are wide gaps, including my own. Now that being said? The one couple I know where the hubby has a "checkered" past, so does his wife. So my "average" shows that most couples are fairly …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 02:35 PM
2

I think overcoming this probably requires a fundamental shift in how she thinks about sex, which is possible but difficult. In my case that "shift" was RP. Because yes, I can without a doubt say that to me "sex" used to be something sacred, and even now that I logically know better, its very difficult to let go of that ideal.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 02:30 PM
6

We have a winner! Although in my case it was "no sex before commitment", but that was because my mother had no ground to stand on with the "before marriage" part, because I existed.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 02:28 PM
1

It's weird how strongly my sex drive seems to be connected to my feels despite me not even realising it most of the time. I've come to the conclusion that in my case this is probably because I'm not all that "in touch" with my feelings overall, I have difficulty seeing when they are overly influencing my actions, which is why I put so much diligent effort into figuring out why I feel the way I do on occasion. When I "feel compelled" to do or act a specific way without any logical reason, that's …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 02:09 PM
2

Friend with benefits is someone you meet socially and bone while also still doing friendy shit with them. So what's the difference between this and a LTR? The commitment and exclusivity?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 01:00 PM
1

Short answer? No I think that level of compatibility should be there, but I'm of the mind that if I'm interested in a relationship, there is no reason to hide that from the gate. It sets the tone of the relationship from there out, which is to say that although I like my wife a lot she's not my friend. She's a genuinely cool person to hang out with, and I'd definitely chat her up in friend groups. But she is first and foremost my wife, which means my lover. We can and do "friend" things together…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 02:03 AM
3

First things first: your comment resonates with me an awful lot. But that's not what I found interesting, because I'm well aware I need an emotional/"deeper" connection to have sex. But this: But I'm incapable of being sexually attracted to someone unless there's an emotional connection first. Isn't quite right for me, and I wonder if it's a result of male vs female sex drive. In my case, I can see a woman and find her VERY attractive in a physical way. Meaning a woman can easily "rev my motor" …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/16 01:48 AM
2

My first LTR mate's step-dad did underwater welding on the locks and dams around the Pittsburgh area. He only worked at most 2/3rds of the year (cold winters and all) and was NEVER hurting for cash to buy toys. He really wasn't the brightest bulb in the box by any means, but the man could apparently weld in a diving suit like a champ!
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/16 08:32 PM
3

Underwater welding. My son just applied to a trade school to learn exactly this. We're going to tour the facility next week.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/16 08:30 PM
1

I find it staggering how the manosphere is generally very hard-right and authoritarian, yet they suddenly make a 180 degree turn when it comes to defending feckless and deadbeat dads? I am in NO WAY trying to defend "deadbeat dad's". The man I talked about earlier got hurt working under the table (because he couldn't make enough at a legit job) and as such had no workers comp, and no health insurance to cover the injury. Of course he couldn't admit he was working illegally (partly to pay the chi…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/16 08:23 PM
1

So in your mind, a man who can't afford to pay child support today and his family is best served by putting him in jail thus guaranteeing he also won't be able to pay tomorrow? Or next week? See here is the problem: that money does NOT belong to the state, although they've firmly put themselves in that position on purpose. The money belongs to that man's children. Full stop. His ex/baby-momma ONLY has access to it because she is the legal guardian of those children, and that money should be goin…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/16 07:56 PM
2

Two stepping is just one-on-one, with spins and twirls Looks a awful lot like the traditional Polka dancing I grew up around. That shit IS fun, but I honestly don't know a single woman under the age of 60 outside my immediately family that can Polka at all. And I'd have no idea at all of where I could go to hear Polka music. ROFL
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/16 07:46 PM
1

But I can't see your typical Redditor being interested in country dancing lol. Which is a shame - it's fun! I just can't. Every time I see a country line dance I have flashbacks of Disco in the 70's. Plus I'm really not a fan of country music as a genre. I like some individual acts and songs, but I can only listen to it for a short period of time before I need to put on my headphones and listen to Pantera for awhile. Just to clean my head. HAHA
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/16 06:56 PM
5

Meh. The "mental/emotional investment" is different, but hard to explain. I'd say I'm very emotionally invested in my kids, but its not really based on anything outside of the fact that they are my kids. (yes, even the ones that aren't biologically mine. I don't play favorites.) The emotional investment in my wife is different, because I expect a certain level of it from her in return, while I expect no such thing from my children. (although of course I hope they'll grow to appreciate the effort…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/16 06:51 PM
2

My friends and I meet up every Tuesday at a bar down the street from my house and play board games. If you can play a fucking game of Risk at a bar, it's not exactly a wild party environment, lol. We tend to play cards. :P The thing is: that really isn't the type of environment you can expect to pick someone up in, so when we start having these discussions it ALWAYS goes straight to meat markets. And sure, that's probably very true. However, if your goal is to just go out and enjoy an evening wi…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/16 06:37 PM
2

The concept of a laid back dive bar where you can have a conversation is lost on so many people here. It's weird. Not at all! If I go out to drink at all, this is where it happens. However the issue is I'm not really meeting new people there, because its "my" dive bar, and I am not going to go exploring for new ones around here. There are a few bars I simply know I should NEVER show my face in, but many I'm not so sure of, and don't want to learn the hard way.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/16 06:17 PM
2

Beer and mixed hard liquor! My kind of evening! and anyway you'll find better conversation and (honestly) higher-quality people somewhere like a brewery that doesn't charge an entrance fee. And if your goal is to catch a tasty buzz with minimum drink purchase, most of those breweries have the kind of beer that'll take the rust of nails, and that shit often kicks like a mule!
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/16 06:12 PM
2

If you can't pay money you owe to the state, then don't be surprised when the state enacts punitive measures on you for your failure to do so. Does it make ANY SENSE AT ALL to put a man in jail because he can't pay child support? Do you think he'll earn more money while incarcerated?! I actually know a woman who's ex lost his job and got put in jail for not paying support. She actually tried to get the court NOT to arrest him, because she knew it wasn't going to lead to her child support check a…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/16 05:22 PM
9

If you are actually going to run your Life-Cycle-Analysis, KIDS are eleventy times more expensive than women will ever be. That is a fact. HOLY SHIT YES!
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/16 05:03 PM
1

It's navigating the hookup market with strangers although the vast majority of first time hookups aren't even with strangers. Why do you assume RP only applies to "hookup markets"? I haven't set foot in a nightclub post RP with any intent at all to pick up a rando for a ONS. Sure, much of what is discussed in the 'sphere is mostly geared at getting notches, but there is a vast amount of info there that ALSO applies to other goals in regards to dating and mating. But just for kicks, what if my so…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/16 04:10 PM
4

It's sad how many people buy lottery tickets.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/16 04:48 AM
1

So you can say that the marriage is humming right along and I'll call it a sham marriage. It may be a sham, but if the kids don't know, and the wife doesn't know, as immoral and awful as the situation may be, it's less destructive overall than a divorce. "Success" isn't necessarily measured in happiness in my book, but in results. And I'll agree some women are attention seeking and some men "step out" when they've also "checked out", but I've not seen that as the norm. I suppose we can debate ov…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/16 04:23 AM
1

In general, men have to go looking for sex. Very few men are "turning down offers of sex" on a regular basis.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/16 04:10 AM
1

It's worse because as long as a cheating husband doesn't get caught, the marriage can hum right along. If the woman is cheating, the marriage is already over. Harsh but true. Cheating still sucks either way.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/16 02:52 AM
1

Fine to have that attitude if you have gone out of your way to keep a low n count too. Odd thing to say. It seems to me you'd have to "go out of your way" to get a high N. I don't want a man with a high n count either - but probably only because mine is low and I'm more comfortable with someone like me. I'm realistic. I wouldn't expect a woman my age that I'm attracted to and in my peer group to have an N equal to or lower than mine. I would have a very limited pool to fish in if that was my bas…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/16 02:48 AM
5

Point being, what you described as the new average offers virtually nothing compelling Right, which is why we often say the "average" man is screwed because being average just isn't good enough, even for most "average" women. But, by default, most men are going to be... AVERAGE
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/16 09:00 PM
2

How many men fit that part of the description, alone? Just a ballpark guess? Because that's always been my idea of ordinary, in those fields. That is your idea of an "ordinary" man?! That's practically the ideal!
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/16 08:58 PM
2

I always knew colleges influenced their "host" areas, but damn that is stark!
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/16 06:29 PM
3

Well, we did NOT raise our children with a religious background, so my guess is it probably IS generational to an extent. My wife and I both were raised Catholic, and both left the faith around our early 20's, for much of the same reasons as funny as that is. We BOTH decided that if our children were going to be religious, it would be their choice of what faith to follow, if any. that being said? I'll fully admit we raised them with mostly Christian morals/ideals, so we really haven't gone that …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/16 06:09 PM
3

For this area? Probably. But I have no delusion that I'd be anywhere near "middle class" if I lived on one of the coasts. But even if I am firmly into MC (which I assure you I'm not) my attitude isn't going to change. At best? I'd become a WC man that "did good". I'll be honest: we live where we live right now not because its where we want to be, its convenient for where we NEED to be right now, and plenty cheap enough to afford without duress. (meaning, we could probably live somewhere a bit ni…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/16 06:03 PM
2

I think the whole idea of divorced parents dating around is more upper WC like associates' degree holders, bachelors degree from a cheap school, and guys in unions. The $30,000 group. This is my class, we're insulated from material poverty but our tastes are viewed as lowbrow I should have read down before I commented above. This is part of what I was saying, that "divorce rape" wasn't really a thing when I was a child in the 70's and 80's, but by the late 90's many of my male friends and peers …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/16 05:49 PM
3

Don't forget religion plays a role here as well in the WC. I saw a lot of "heathenry" for sure, but those of us that were poor but in strict religious families did NOT participate. In fact, to be honest, religion was a primary way we were "kept away" from it all, by the implication that the poor folks banging like bunnies were going to hell essentially. And because of the religious influence there were plenty of C/FM marriages, at least in my grandparents generation, which is the only one in my …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/16 05:46 PM
7

They see how it is in their immediate environment and thus it obviously must be the exact same everywhere else and anyone that says that they've got a limited world view is obviously lying, lesbian or wrong. Sure many RP men may be exactly like this. However, its also possible that maybe some RP men understand that "life isn't like this everywhere", but they ALSO understand that they are NOT going to be living somewhere else anytime soon, so for all intent and purpose the world IS exactly what t…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/16 04:57 PM
2

Wouldn't that be yet another reason why it's more difficult for women to to choose to cheat? I suspect that in most cases it would mean the "process" a woman follows that leads to cheating is longer, sure. But the actual choice to cheat is as simple as "fuck this loser! I'm done trying" and off she goes. But I said in my original reply that to me personally, it makes no difference. A cheater is a cheater and the reasons aren't really all that relevant to me. I just found that an interesting thou…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/16 04:47 PM
3

For real. I'm not even in the camp that says a woman cheating is worse (because in my mind cheating is horrible no matter who did it) and I have to say, all this did was reinforce the idea that a woman cheating IS WORSE for the success of a LTR/Marriage than a man cheating. Seems glaringly obvious.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/16 02:05 PM
6

And the thing that confuses me the most about TRP is how many guys are willing to accept what they call "AWALT" behavior in their partners, instead of saying, "Wow, I can do better than this." I actually came to this conclusion AFTER I found the 'sphere.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/16 01:54 PM
2

Well, maybe she didn't have sex with anyone because she was so unattractive she couldn't get laid. What makes you so special in that case? I have a very low threshold for physical attraction?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/16 01:21 PM
1

My current wife? Nope. My ex? In some ways yeah absolutely. Different but similar.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/16 01:20 AM
3

No I have no illusion that men are remotely more well intentioned than women.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/16 01:16 AM
1

I had to learn to keep up.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/16 12:40 AM
2

I tend to believe most people have selfish motivations to varying degrees, man or woman. Which is partly why I say "people" suck. People implies men and women. But you're right that I'm lazy and often use "average" in place of "decent but boring", but that's why it's in quotes. And yes there are plenty of asshats on the planet who have a penis. Since women only want nice guys, why would we even be discussing them?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/16 12:39 AM
1

I was an only child so didn't deal with that. However, my friends with older sisters had to deal with: "Dude, you're sister is hot. Like REALLY hot. Man I'd..." Usually followed by a punch to the gut. One friend in particular had a sister 2 years older, so when she hit 16 my 14 year old peers lost their minds. Admittly, she was kinda hot.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/16 12:08 AM
2

I have no clue. I like them because good tattoos are indeed art and because tasteful ink on a woman turns me on in a "right kind of dirty" way. (Blame it on my roots!) Bad ink on a woman is gross, but I'd say the same about bad ink on a man. And what constitutes "tasteful" is highly subjective.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/16 11:49 PM
1

I pitied my buddies with sisters. Especially if they were older sisters.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/16 11:33 PM
2

True, but making him a blameless innocent angel does. Any RP man that does this isn't a color red I recognize. I sympathize with the "average" man, and perhaps defend him a lot here. But if that man was my friend? I'd tell him to get his shit together and STOP being average. Perhaps this is why I don't find TRP to be my cup of tea. Because my intent isn't to make the average Joe out to be a victim. I'm mostly trying to explain why he's such a loser despite not being a bad guy. So sure, maybe I t…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/16 11:07 PM
2

You just described my problem with humanity! Welcome to the club! LOL
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/16 10:50 PM
3

Depends on what "scale" you're using. Could be omega, beta, or fruit roll up depending on who you ask.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/16 10:39 PM
7

I have no idea where you got the impression RP men think the "average man" is wonderful. One of the primary principles of RP is don't be "average", because average isn't good enough. And personally, I spent much of my youth believing most men were horn dogs led around by their dicks. On more than one occasion I actually said so to a guy with less than stellar results! I never in my life for one moment believed the "average man" was some noble creature. They're mostly labor slaves. Some of them a…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/16 10:37 PM
2

Be happy about that. The alternative isn't so great, although probably more peaceful.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/16 10:22 PM
2

Ironically, I met my husband randomly in the street ( Aren't we the pair! You stating that "day game" is annoying but admitting you met the hubby by random chance during the day, and me saying for many men using their social circle isn't realistic, but I've had the most success that way. LOL
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/16 09:33 PM
2

But it does seem to me that "she could have been with dozens of men but she picked me" is at least as validating as "she didn't have sex with anyone but me". I personally don't think either extreme is necessarily healthy, but I can't help but point out she may have already "been with" dozens of men, and perhaps none of them picked her. What makes me so special in that case? It's okay to prefer one or the other, but I think it's a mistake to say that dating a promiscuous person can't be validatin…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/16 09:30 PM
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