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bismarck8888 Archive

View 19 posts and 34 comments by bismarck8888 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

I got a haircut a couple of days ago. Actually, more than a haircut, I changed my whole hairstyle up. When I got home, the first question out of my wife's mouth is whether or not I was having an affair. Her hands were all over me. I have not gotten a good affair comment in months! Of course the day ended with some great sex. Just a reminder I am still on the right track. P.S. - New guys, the affair accusations will come. You may not think so, but they will. Later, they present great shit tests/c…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/12/16 08:57 PM
2

I was already paying all the bills except for insurance for my wife and kids and for the kids education expenses (daycare and private school). I am also in charge of our savings and investments. I would occasionally ask for money from her to contribute to the education expenses when she failed to pay the due bill and it was like pulling teeth. In the past I would try to DEER and it turned into a fight every time I asked for her to contribute. I am pretty sure that night I told her that her free …
/r/MarriedRedPill16/09/16 07:37 PM
1

Danger zone? Danger of what? Is she going to divorce me? Well, I am ready for that. I have separate finances. I know the best divorce attorneys. I am in great shape and attractive. I practice game. Would the process suck? Sure, but I would be fine coming out the other side. Danger of her being a bitch again? Well, that leads straight back to divorce which I am ready for. Danger of cheating? Again, we circle back to divorce. When I nuked it, the divorce card was her only play. That hand no longer…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/09/16 07:32 PM
2

Stop putting up roadblocks. It is not difficult at all. Look online for a sports team, some sort of training team, or a hobby and sign up today. Get out of the house at least once a week. Once I did that, my social life went from lame to great pretty quickly. I have a ton of new friends now and do more with old friends than I use to. So either shit or get off the pot, but don't say it is easier said than done because that is not true.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/16 08:45 PM
2

This. This is exactly what I am talking about. I think I gave off the wrong impression with this post that my wife is a giant bitch all the time. Well... when I found this place and before I started improving myself, she was. (I see now it was my fault). But then I started setting boundaries, lifting weights, kicking ass at work, getting a social life, reading and learning, developing frame, and employing these exact tactics. And you know what, things got better. But, like you say, my wife is no…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/06/16 01:45 AM
2

That is a shit test. Turn that one into sex.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/06/16 09:56 PM
1

"If your wife being a bitch bothers you then you are in her frame." I don't agree with this at all. Your wife can be a bitch without you being sucked into her frame and at the same time you can still want her not to be a bitch. Frame is not about closing your ears and eyes and being completely self absorbed. It is about not being sucked into other people's emotions. In this case, I am perfectly fine (now) with not getting sucked into my wife's bitchy emotions yet still prefer her to not act a li…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/06/16 07:43 PM
5

Withdrawal of attention (physically leaving) was my go to move in the beginning and it was used a lot. It is a great tactic for guys starting out because it 1. removes you from the house 2. ensures you STFU 3. and makes sure you do not engage 4. and provides some dread. I still employ it, but now that my SMV has increased and frame is much stronger, I find AM and AA to be much better at addressing bitchiness. However, it took a while to develop AM and AA (which is why telling new guys to use tho…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/06/16 05:52 PM
6

This one is easy, you are completely stuck in her frame. That's it.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/16 02:45 PM
1

It is not so much about what I said, but more about how I reacted. I know my wife and know her outbursts come one right after the other. The key was to not be fazed and continue doing what I was doing without letting her behavior affect me. In this case, I just calmly listened, continued shaving, and sort of found amusement in what she was doing. After she let it all out, and she saw I was not rattled, I responded with words and actions. This works a lot better now after a year of practice than …
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/16 02:09 PM
1

Defend, explain, excuse, and rationalize. Read the side bar!
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/16 01:59 PM
2

I see what you are getting at and am not necessarily opposed to going the nuke route. However, she really has improved her behavior over the course of this last year. Before I discovered the red pill, she would act this way almost every time people came over (friends or family). Now it only happens during times of big stress or when it is coupled with her period, and not even every time when these events are happening. Like I said, I even had a little fun this time around, so nuking was not on t…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/16 02:01 PM
1

Yeah. I didn't even get into that. I actually changed my whole shaving habits. Now using nice shaving cream, a brush, safety razor, and aftershave. I look, feel, and smell sharp. I do it for myself, but my wife and others notice.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/12/15 02:31 PM
3

I use to be the same way with clothes, but getting new clothes is important for a lot of reasons. First, if you are lifting properly, your old clothes will not fit you. In order to look your best you need well fitting clothes, so you are required to get your nice suits altered and buy new threads. Both women and men notice fit men in well fitted clothes increasing your SMV. Also, your confidence will increase because you will know how good you look. Second, your wife/SA is not your mother. You s…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/12/15 01:58 PM
4

Oh... The "fair" comment. I had been getting that one for months. I found the best way to combat it is to say nothing at all. Just ignore it completely. If it fails to get a rise out of you, it no longer works as a tactic for her. As for correcting the kids and her interfering, I just say there is no negotiating this, lay down the law, and usually leave the scene so the shit test can't get legs. Been working like magic the last couple of months.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/10/15 08:58 PM
2

I am convinced the family of the wife notices the changes before the wife does. It starts with with physical changes and highlights why lifting is so important. Once you take your shirt off at a family pool party and the whole family stares at you and showers you with compliments, your wife is hit over the head with a ton of brick. She will take notice of their reaction and find pride in her man. After the physical changes are noticed, the mental changes just seem natural. The extended family ac…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/09/15 04:22 AM
10

This is easy. You know the answer. If you want to hang out with her, it is fine to ask her to hang out. Once she says "Not really" to wanting to hang out, stop talking and find something better to do. And for the love of god, don't act all butt hurt about it. This is day one stuff, and why rookies are told to STFU and become outcome independent. Get the hell out of her frame.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/09/15 02:47 PM
8

Sports teams or MMA type training: I suggest this for a variety of reasons. It is a great place to meet more athletic guys and you are all involved in a masculine activity. There is a rush in playing sports and winning or being involved in a great play. It builds confidence, gets adrenaline pumping, and keeps you in shape. Plus you bond with your teammates on and off the field (beers after games) and it gives you an excuse to leave the house at least once a week. Really, joining a team or self d…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/09/15 09:18 PM
4

The hoplite analogy is a good one. What faking it until you make it means is really putting your emotions in check, especially in the beginning. When you first start, you have to suppress strong emotions when she shit tests you, and you are acting "fake" by not giving into those emotions. Later, as you internalize frame, a shit test will hardly get a rise out of you. The strong emotions are gone. You can see what is happening in slow motions. At this point, you are starting to make it.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/09/15 12:38 PM
6

Back before kids, when I was still naturally more red pill, my wife bitched about some burgers I was making. Full on teenage tantrum. I ate mine and gave her meal to the dog. She never bitched about me making dinner for us after that.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/09/15 09:21 PM
12

I had a similar thing happen a couple of days ago. Not the abusive claim, but threat of leaving. It all happened because my princess wanted to sleep in late on Sunday and one of my kids had the audacity to wake her up without me realizing the kid was awake after I told my wife I would try and let her sleep in the morning. (I was in the kitchen with the other kid taking care of breakfast and getting things ready for the day). Big shitstorm ensued. She said she would get out, stay with her sister-…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/08/15 01:25 PM
1

Yep. After the heavy withdraw tingles came. She was waiting in bed for me with no clothes on this morning before I left for work. Withdrawing attention is a good way to get your wife to initiate if you do it right and for the right reasons.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 07:58 PM
2

This. I was already taking the ipad for the night, the punishment had to be for the next night. On top of that, my oldest child (3) does understand consequences. It is important to be consistent and follow through. That is why I never make threats I do not intend to back up with action. Because of this, she listens to me and obeys my instructions most of the time. She knows my wife's threats are hollow and she can manipulate her with crying, ignoring, ect. With my wife, my child knows she will g…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 07:54 PM
3

Leaving is my go-to, and something I rarely did before learning these strategies. That day I went without the kids because I was already going to the gym and left that night after I put them down. I had already spent the whole morning with them while my wife went to do some extra work. But usually, I will taken them with me and do something fun like the park, pound or zoo (they love animals), or swimming.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 07:02 PM
0

While agree with you generally, and have been using actions instead of words for 4 months now, this fight and talk about boundaries has so far produced remarkable results. She has been nicer or more sexual towards me after this incident to an extent I have not seen since we first got married. But it has only been two days. Maybe I should report back in about 2 weeks or a months, but so far so good.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/15 06:55 PM
1

Great advice. Just to follow up. Since I went home at lunch yesterday for a "talk," I went home at lunch today for a fuck.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/06/15 06:14 PM
1

Thanks for saying this. Not for reassurance of my mind but because it was exactly what I was thinking and put much more bluntly than I would have put it. I have been trying to get my wife to develop new friendships and hobbies for a long time and will continue to encourage it (she is not from this state and does not have a built in social base). The good that can come out of it far outweighs the off chance she cheats on me because of it.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/06/15 03:18 AM
2

I read on one of the side bar materials, not sure which one, that your wife will often be the last one to really know the changes you are making both physically and mentally. I have been at it for a little over 3 months, but I think this weekend is when it finally hit my wife straight over the head. On Friday, we went to my bother-in-law's pool and my wife's entire family was there. I took off my shirt, put on sunscreen, and had the entire family staring at me, followed by "Wow, (insert real nam…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/06/15 05:17 PM
1

I have not read WISNIFG yet. I have read The Married Man Sex Primer and NMMNG. I think I know what I need to start on tonight.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/05/15 05:06 PM
6

Pregnancy was the trap that got me stuck in beta hell for 3+ years. I bought into having to make it all about her during that time and it was all downhill from there. When the kid came, I am pretty sure my wife suffered from postpartum and there was no satisfying her. And I tried to help her by giving into her demands, and as we all know, that only made the problem worse. With the second kids, I was a little more assertive, but the same issues appeared again and the relationship between us suffe…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/05/15 04:15 PM
1

I have been tracking those days too... Fun times for sure!
/r/MarriedRedPill18/05/15 08:28 PM
3

As someone who is new here, I agree your general point is correct, but you must also understand there are several different stories of how folks got here. Some people got here because they are desperate. These people may have a way lower SMV than their LTR partner, are likely out of shape, and have no backbone. These people discovered this place as a last resort, read up, start to work out and get a backbone for the first time in a long time. For them patience and perseverance is of the utmost i…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/04/15 01:18 PM
4

Thank you. This is exactly want I needed to hear and the reason I posted. I am just not good at this yet and still letting that beta child-like side through. I plan to stay focused and continue to improve. Even when she laying hay-makers with personal attacks, I need to either treat it like water off my back, or tell her firmly I will not be attacked that way. I should not resort to similar behavior. I think some other posters have nailed it too, that I am still in the anger stage and am in deni…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/04/15 04:36 PM
2

I have to agree with you on that comment. I should not have said it and I know that is where I lost frame. I said it after she called me a liar (when I didn't lie), told me I should be ashamed of the house we live in now (I am not), and after I explained that the house we were living in now was a great deal and then she accused me of not seeing any of the savings from living there (even though she does). Usually this would have been a big fight back and forth, me on the merits, her using emotion…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/04/15 03:37 PM
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