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stew7000 Archive

View 15 posts and 180 comments by stew7000 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Just posted about this on your other post, but really think a break from social media would be good for you rn. I've been on my phone way less, and my wife has followed my lead - we get a lot more done and are more present. I don't think it will make all of your problems go away, but it's a start. 2/2 of the posts I've seen from you involve Snapchat. Just give it up for a bit and see what happens. And don't do it for her, do it for you.
/r/askMRP08/08/17 06:18 AM
2

I'd lay off social media. That's the first thing. Second, your comments like "I'll show you a lot tonight" are cringe worthy for her at this stage bc she isn't attracted to you right now and you haven't put in the work. Be patient and put in the work. It's not her, it's you bro.
/r/askMRP08/08/17 06:10 AM
1

Amen
/r/askMRP02/08/17 09:01 AM
1

OI is key. Thanks prof
/r/askMRP02/08/17 07:57 AM
1

Thank you. That's great advice.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/08/17 04:45 PM
1

I've yet to read the book MMSLP. Is this video series give you the same info as the book, or is it different?
/r/askMRP01/08/17 07:58 AM
1

It really is all about discipline and consistency. Emotions and motivation are fleeting. Thanks for this reminder.
/r/askMRP31/07/17 08:47 AM
1

I failed to intro my bro and friends during a Rambo phase. Best bet is to be an example and they'll eventually get curious (or they won't).
/r/askMRP31/07/17 08:45 AM
0

You could have done something to better yourself during that hour other than sitting in a bar scrolling away on your phone. That's the first thing. Second, the way you talk about your wife shows that you see her as the problem. She's your mirror. You are the problem. And the nice part about that, is that you are also the solution. Get to work. Lead. Be disciplined. Be attractive. Your wife isn't attracted to you and that's on you. Remember that. Your death bed will be a pretty pathetic place to …
/r/askMRP31/07/17 08:40 AM
1

Agree with thunderbeyond about quality > quantity. I've taken my son out for a father/son night and spent the 3 hours preoccupied with work, checking my phone, and other nonsense and it's ended up hurting our relationship more than helping it. By contrast, I've set a timer for 10 minutes, put my phone down and focused exclusively on my son (playing ball, wrestling, catching bugs, or whatever) and those 10 minutes end up being the highlight of the day and really strengthen our relationship.
/r/askMRP31/07/17 08:23 AM
2

Focus on you. There's definitely hope, you just need to be patient. Your wife isn't attracted to you right now. And that won't change for awhile. The sex life you currently have is your fault, and yours alone. You have to own it. Lift. Read. Be attractive (don't be unattractive). Lead. Beware of going red pill Rambo (read up on this if you haven't already). The toughest part is having the discipline to stick with the program and not expect her to be anxiously jumping into bed with you because yo…
/r/askMRP31/07/17 08:16 AM
1

This hit me like a ton of bricks. Thank you for posting. Was on my way (3 months of MRP) and took my foot off the gas (last 4 months). This is some real shit right here.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/07/17 12:20 PM
1

Words are just words. I'll be back with actions to report on. Thanks.
/r/askMRP06/05/17 09:03 PM
2

Yeah, routine was ill advised. In it for longevity and won't be overdoing anything. I'll still hit it 6x/week but will mix in cardio.
/r/askMRP06/05/17 02:16 PM
1

Def didn't get a rush posting. I've hidden from this group for awhile, and decided it's time to admit somewhere how the past 1.5 mos have gone. But yeah, I'm sure there's some of that validation seeking shit within me. Back to square one. I'm determined to climb out. Hit the gym this morning.
/r/askMRP06/05/17 02:15 PM
3

Yup. Totally allowed it to excuse the slide in my own mind. Pathetic.
/r/askMRP06/05/17 02:12 PM
2

Lost my way. No excuses.
/r/askMRP06/05/17 02:11 PM
1

Very appropriate clip.
/r/askMRP06/05/17 04:06 AM
1

You're right bro. This shit is worthless. Not sure why I posted it.
/r/askMRP06/05/17 04:00 AM
1

Just posted in AskMRP. Growing pains.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/05/17 03:06 AM
1

LIFTING 6x/week @ 4:30am. This has been magic. Start winding down @ 9:30pm each night. Chose to begin this time at daylight saving (when I'd have to biggest excuse NOT to start) Goal: stay consistent. READING Primarily focused on business books at this point. Goal: continue with business books. APPEARANCE Staying on point in this category. Had a lazy day this weekend that I regretted. Goal: don't break daily routine. WORK Hustle has paid off. Closed a slew of new deals. Lost one big deal and mop…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/03/17 10:25 PM
1

Yup. Will stay away from this. Thank you.
/r/askMRP19/03/17 08:46 PM
1

Yup. Owning it. Doubling down.
/r/askMRP19/03/17 08:44 PM
1

I was close to not doing the right thing. Good to hear from everyone here and wake up.
/r/askMRP19/03/17 08:42 PM
1

Yeah that sounds about right for an acceptable level of vulnerability.
/r/askMRP19/03/17 08:42 PM
2

I've dished out this same advice (vent to guys) to a bunch of guys, but for some reason wasn't coming to that conclusion here. Thanks for the reminder.
/r/askMRP19/03/17 08:41 PM
1

I'll look into this stoic meditation / negative visualizations. Seems like family alpha wrote about that once. Your overall response was great and plainly stated - thanks.
/r/askMRP19/03/17 08:40 PM
1

This is all truth. Validation seeking is a struggle that comes to the surface regularly. Prepping my OYS for this week and will have an update.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/03/17 04:26 PM
1

Fuck me. Own it. LIFTING 6x/week but the snooze button made me its bitch past couple weeks. The fire I had in January and had me driving at 5am in blizzards at 5am is waning. This morning was my latest yet: 7:30. fuck. And I didn't get my full workout in. Yes, I've gone 6x per week but my intensity has lessened. Goal: get back to 5:30. READING Just wrapped up Hold On To Your NUTS. Not sidebar material, but drives home very similar points. I've also delved into some business books as my business …
/r/MarriedRedPill26/02/17 04:37 AM
1

I didn't really respond to any of her points - I think my post gives the impression that I talked a lot. I didn't. I still talked too much tho. And I didn't hold her close like you said - I'm certain that would have helped. I am going to face any remaining fear I have of her emotional wrath and overcome it.
/r/askMRP11/02/17 01:54 PM
2

I'm about to enter month 3 and I relate to your post a lot. One thing I've come to realize and get from this community is that I need to up the fun and build some connection with my wife. My wife has also been trying to figure out where she fits in my life now (it can't just be sex). I'd mix it up and just make life adventurous again. She wants you to take her on an exciting rollercoaster ride. Don't be predictable or boring (dinner and movie). My latest post, while laced with some vomit, ended …
/r/askMRP10/02/17 09:34 PM
1

I remember this from early reading, I'll re-implement, but avoid autism.
/r/askMRP10/02/17 08:55 PM
1

Agree 100%. This post sucked.
/r/askMRP10/02/17 08:54 PM
1

Yup - done texting.
/r/askMRP10/02/17 08:53 PM
1

I've been doing this off and on (asking her to do things and then doing them without saying anything when she doesn't). This is a good reminder to do that more often. Last night was a good start to sharing time and affection.
/r/askMRP10/02/17 08:52 PM
2

I failed the text game. Renewed commitment not to fuck up again in that dept - no excuses. Glad I'm catching the flaw in cutting her off completely. The date last night was actually great and we had a much better kiss after. She thanked me over and over again and talked about how fun it was. Definitely feeling the uphill tho. Today I've just been angry honestly - anger phase possibly - just angry that I've squandered my best years and angry that I've gotta climb out of this massive hole I've dug…
/r/askMRP10/02/17 08:51 PM
1

I've been neck beard and Obamacare Boy in the past but no longer - that's still in her mind at times tho, no doubt. I like the idea of being unaware that I'm changing in her eyes. I've seen great gains in sexualizing the relationship w/o sex (dirty talk, kino, etc) which she's actually responded well too. This dumb pecking thing is rare lately - I just internalized it and puked to you guys. Helpful to get my ass handed to me here so I don't sit and sulk.
/r/askMRP10/02/17 08:26 PM
1

This is good - I think I was going too Rambo by leading with the second question but not accepting alternatives.
/r/askMRP10/02/17 08:22 PM
1

That post is great. Thank you
/r/askMRP10/02/17 08:21 PM
1

I'll internalize both of these articles. Monk mode isn't a bad idea, and I won't let up on gym and diet.
/r/askMRP10/02/17 08:14 PM
1

Guilty as charged. I need to quit talking about stupid shit and just keep the pedal down at gym, dressing well, and living the life I want to live. Need to quit internalizing her games.
/r/askMRP10/02/17 05:57 PM
1

Look up AM post on Rational Male blog.
/r/askMRP10/02/17 05:54 PM
1

You're right. She doesn't give it the thought that I do. I'm done thinking about that shit.
/r/askMRP10/02/17 05:53 PM
2

Yeah that sums up where I derailed. Thanks for the wake up call.
/r/askMRP10/02/17 01:57 PM
1

I agree I talked too much in this case. Can you elaborate on the comfort test failures and desexualization acceptance so I know where I messed up?
/r/askMRP10/02/17 01:55 PM
2

Might try this
/r/askMRP10/02/17 12:31 AM
2

I'd love to avoid the heavy stuff but not sure how to pass comfort tests without facing them every now and again.
/r/askMRP10/02/17 12:31 AM
2

Seems to be the consensus. I'll lift the ban and make it a joke moving forward.
/r/askMRP10/02/17 12:27 AM
3

Perfect. Thanks
/r/askMRP10/02/17 12:26 AM
3

I'll def keep pedal down on gym and diet. Would the peck boundary be seen as a blow up? Let me know what kind of blow up to avoid.
/r/askMRP10/02/17 12:12 AM
2

I don't know man... maybe you're right. Maybe this is an ill-advised boundary to set. Pecks just have this "I'm seriously not attracted to you but I will give you this peck so you can have your table scraps and leave me alone" vibe. And I genuinely would prefer nothing to that. But maybe I just need to accept it. Additional insight here would be solid.
/r/askMRP09/02/17 11:58 PM
2

Lol. Yeah dude I've been hitting up OYS for past 3 weeks.
/r/askMRP09/02/17 11:54 PM
3

That's a great way to put it -- I've stopped referencing her for decisions and emotions -- and as a result she feels useless and "not a part of my life." I'm going to keep upping my positive vibe around the house and stop being business like. I've been borderline Rambo at times, and I know that's no bueno.
/r/askMRP09/02/17 10:40 PM
2

Lol - backfiring sounds messy
/r/askMRP09/02/17 09:40 PM
1

Yeah definitely.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/02/17 12:26 AM
1

lol I might just buy that.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/02/17 12:26 AM
1

Hell yeah
/r/MarriedRedPill07/02/17 09:28 PM
3

LIFTING Maintaining. 6x per week early morning. Caught myself hitting snooze a couple times. I've been under the weather but that's not a good excuse. Snooze can die this coming week. Ate too much Super Bowl night, but good diet otherwise. READING Finished WISNIFG. Now a couple chapters into Rational Male. I thought I'd read MMSLP first, but Rational Male has actually been very good for me and feels foundational. It also helps me connect the dots about what's been said in this sub. APPEARANCE Ma…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/02/17 07:12 PM
2

I have the same issue with micro shit test moments like your cheerio example. I'll sometimes slip and DEER like you did, but I've become pretty quick with AA in that kind of situation. "Cool - (turn to child) sounds like we're going to have to back off the cheerio binges little Tommy!" or whatever. Or if child isn't there just nod and say "Alright." You could also kid around with something like "Pretty sure the box says Cheerios are good for your heart, and I want my kid to have a good heart so …
/r/MarriedRedPill07/02/17 06:50 PM
2

I agree with this. No need to find a rockstar job or something that matches your resume, just do anything that gets you moving and brings in some kind of income. Waiter is a good idea - provides opportunity to hone your game as well.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/02/17 06:38 PM
1

Will do thank you
/r/askMRP03/02/17 04:16 AM
1

On it. Your blog rules btw.
/r/askMRP03/02/17 04:16 AM
4

Oh yeah, and I got a nice new label affixed to my name from u/weakandsensitive. I admit to being a newb and being too much of a value leech during my first month here. I accept the label and hope to shake it off as I continue the journey.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/02/17 10:42 PM
3

LIFTING 6x per week @ 5:30AM. Going well. Only 2 months in. Set boundary with wife that it's sacred time. She's respected it. Today offered to give me a massage and said shoulders / back felt muscular. Good times. READING 1 hour left on WISNIFG audiobook. Will move to MMSLP next. Finished NMMNG a few weeks back. APPEARANCE Daily shower and shave after gym, smelling good, chucked 2/3 of my closet and only wear high quality shit that fits well. This and lifting have done absolute wonders for confi…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/02/17 10:38 PM
1

This is deep - thank you for sharing. Will need to re-read a few times.
/r/askMRP02/02/17 09:26 PM
1

Thank you
/r/askMRP02/02/17 09:25 PM
1

Definitely the phase I'm trying to ease into as well.
/r/askMRP02/02/17 09:25 PM
2

lol I will definitely try this role reversal thing with the last slice of bread. She told me I was "objectifying her" today when I complimented her outfit (I probably went a little overboard, she looked great), and later after I showered she complimented me on my looks and I teasingly said not to objectify me. She ate that up.
/r/askMRP02/02/17 09:25 PM
1

Yeah STFU is a great failsafe.
/r/askMRP02/02/17 09:22 PM
1

Yeah. Fogging has confused her, but also seems to de-escalate things. I need to keep practicing AM as I'm sure that will be best. Her brothers do that flawlessly with her.
/r/askMRP02/02/17 09:22 PM
1

Better than it has been, but from this post I'm recognizing that I'm needlessly internalizing things.
/r/askMRP02/02/17 09:20 PM
1

Lol. I will remember this, thank you.
/r/askMRP02/02/17 09:13 PM
1

Context is being more productive. I agree that I need to work on not taking it so seriously and just kid around.
/r/askMRP02/02/17 09:12 PM
1

Book of Pook - perfect I'll queue that one up.
/r/askMRP01/02/17 12:56 AM
1

I've read that post and it's great. Haven't seen a similar one for AA although it's discussed here frequently so I get the gist.
/r/askMRP01/02/17 12:54 AM
1

True. It's an ongoing struggle to stop caring so much about how my wife feels or says how she feels. I don't show my care like I've done in the past, but I'm sure I can't totally hide it from her. I'll up my efforts here. Her actions that go along with her words haven't been problematic, so you're correct in saying these are just words.
/r/askMRP01/02/17 12:53 AM
1

I've done this. And she does seem to respect it. Later in the day she'll teasingly call me a "meanie" and be more flirtatious in general. I'll try to mix it up with this and the AA/AM stuff the other guys in this thread recommended.
/r/askMRP01/02/17 12:50 AM
4

I'm guilty of seeming grumpy as I get shit done. I'll up turn the knob toward happy a couple notches. What do you do after saying "let me make you feel better"?
/r/askMRP01/02/17 12:48 AM
1

Great point with the DPhil reference. I'll lighten up. Question: are AA and AM concepts from Rational Male? Where can I read more in depth on AA / AM?
/r/askMRP01/02/17 12:46 AM
3

--Need to lift--- Yes. You're in this situation because she isn't attracted to you. Don't expect this to change until you've upped your SMV substantially. I don't think this situation would happen to a high SMV, oak, leader if he's doing it right. So that hypothetical isn't worth responding to. Remember, she's your mirror. If you don't like how she's acting, work on you.
/r/askMRP31/01/17 11:33 PM
2

Fuck comfort. Gold.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/01/17 03:33 AM
1

She asks me to sleep in multiple times per week. I just kiss her on the forehead and head to the gym.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/01/17 11:42 PM
1

The Oatmeal has this series on running where he talks about "the blerch." That comes to mind when thinking about competing with the person from yesterday. http://theoatmeal.com/comics/running
/r/MarriedRedPill27/01/17 01:46 PM
4

Yup - poked the bear here and got my ass kicked (deserved). Already hit the gym.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/01/17 01:42 PM
1

U right.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/01/17 01:08 PM
4

I know my post history is weak AF. You called me out on that in my OYS post and I appreciated it. That's actually what inspired me to post here with a win - small as it is - that I figured could be of benefit. Reading this response - sounds like I have the wrong idea about what adds value here. I recognize how new I am to this. I appreciate you and other senior guys calling me out on bullshit. I don't consider it a support group -- it's a group unlike any I've interacted with before precisely be…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/01/17 01:07 PM
1

Just some time for both of us to reset. I felt confident about it and only instituted it for a few weeks. Lifting is filling in the gap in the meantime, and I can tell the attraction is growing during the moratorium. I'll report results later.
/r/askMRP27/01/17 04:35 AM
1

How long have you been a nice guy? Just like shedding pounds, you've got nice guy pounds to shed and she may remain sexless until she knows it's for real. Lifting does more than testosterone/attraction. I'd recommend doing it early in the morning. Start off doing something hard, that takes time to see results. You'll apply the same principles to the other areas of your life. Are you lifting now?
/r/askMRP27/01/17 04:31 AM
1

Makes sense. Thank you for the wake up call.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/01/17 06:01 PM
1

Lifting changes everything.
/r/askMRP25/01/17 05:52 PM
2

That's dope. Did you eventually get rid of scheduled sex? I've had it weekly, and have put a stop to it (at least for now) because of how routine and vanilla it's always been. On a sex moratorium for a couple more weeks and then thinking I won't re-institute scheduled because it kills the mystery and spontaneity.
/r/askMRP25/01/17 05:51 PM
4

First time posting to the OYS thread (I've begun asking questions in askmrp past 2 weeks and have lurked for 2 months). 10 yrs beta prior. 31. 3 kids under 7. 6'0 175 (have been skinny fat and seeing rapid results at gym). Self employed working from home, since RP I've been working in office outside home. Good: -Lifting 6x per week at 5:30am -Listening to Athol Kay's various interviews online daily (still need to hunt down MMSLP) -Taking care of shit around the house and in my family without any…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/01/17 09:49 PM
1

Noted. I'll up the inward focus.
/r/askMRP24/01/17 09:27 PM
1

Agree. Respect still not anywhere near 100% yet.
/r/askMRP24/01/17 09:25 PM
2

I've been trying to play little practical jokes on her when I leave for work. Nothing big, but it's a way to show "You're my girl" or "I love you" without touchy feely flowers or notes. Like find a hideous stuffed animal or figurine and start hiding it places around the house where you know she'll find it. She might start playing back and it just lightens the mood and lets her know you aren't taking life so seriously. She's along for the ride and wants you to make it fun and adventurous. In term…
/r/askMRP24/01/17 09:24 PM
1

Congrats bro. This rules.
/r/askMRP24/01/17 09:04 PM
1

What are your sex targets?
/r/MarriedRedPill24/01/17 07:13 PM
2

Is it a big deal that your wife cuts your hair? Asking genuinely since my wife cuts mine (price is right and she does a good job). But I have wondered if it would be better to do it elsewhere.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/01/17 06:43 PM
1

For sure
/r/askMRP24/01/17 06:34 PM
1

Yeah it's been real interesting to watch her get mad about my reacting like a man instead of a little boy (as I have for 10 yrs) and then she realizes she's now the one being immature and I'm the adult in the room. It's like she just expects my responses / reactions to be what they've always been and then she has to rewind / play it back and make sure she's not hallucinating.
/r/askMRP24/01/17 06:34 PM
1

Yeah this is an interesting point. Hope I didn't lose too many points with it
/r/askMRP24/01/17 06:31 PM
1

Agree
/r/askMRP24/01/17 06:31 PM
2

Good and bad. Mostly good I think. Lots of fogging for a bit. Then stood firm about gym being sacred time (she admitted it wasn't an emergency when she said she needed help while I was at gym). She kept pressing that I was being a dictator and we weren't a team. I fogged but also wouldn't explicitly back away from being the leader (agreed dictatorship is wrong). Slipped and mentioned she was testing me with some things which she vehemently denied in a loving way - I quickly changed the subject i…
/r/askMRP24/01/17 06:27 PM
2

See my comment above to The_Litz - hoping just to make it a joke at this point and have some fun with my wife.
/r/askMRP24/01/17 01:32 PM
1

Yup. My resolve won't be broken. I like the harshness of this forum.
/r/askMRP24/01/17 01:31 PM
1

We talked about it last night briefly and I mostly just laughed it off with her. She seemed to recognize that it was a silly rash thing to do, so now we're kind of turning it into a joke (e.g. "It's going to be the best day of our lives"). Tickets are non refundable so we'll roll with it.
/r/askMRP24/01/17 01:29 PM
1

Conversation went well. I did my best to own everything and not puke reasons. I could tell she respected that I am being more independent, that lifting is sacred time, and she understood that I still love her.
/r/askMRP24/01/17 01:27 PM
3

Good stuff thank you. I love the "nothing will get you down" comment.
/r/askMRP24/01/17 01:24 PM
2

Excellent advice thank you. I'll incorporate this.
/r/askMRP24/01/17 01:22 PM
2

Thank you - I agree it's time to move onto the next phase. I had a great convo w my wife last night. I can work on being more emotionally engaged with her so she feels some comfort.
/r/askMRP24/01/17 01:22 PM
-1

Thanks prof. Isn't her thinking that I'm having or planning an affair effective dread? Let me know how I can offer comfort and support in a positive way. My support has been in loving with actions and not words (taking care of business as you said earlier). If you have resources on this specific topic (comfort/support) I'd love to hear them.
/r/askMRP24/01/17 12:06 AM
-1

I like this thought. The idea of correcting vs just providing instructions. In this case, my plan is to listen to my wife. Maintain my frame. Fog. Hopefully try to find a way to throw some humor into things. And have as pleasant of a convo as I can tonight. I'm engaging in verbal intercourse tonight of my own free will, and I will do my best to pass any shit and comfort tests that come my way. Her texts "you don't seem to care about me" seem to say that she is confused about why I'm now gone so …
/r/askMRP23/01/17 10:52 PM
0

Done.
/r/askMRP23/01/17 10:34 PM
0

10 yrs married. 2 mos RP. I can explain what's happening with me to her, but how do I go about that properly?
/r/askMRP23/01/17 10:32 PM
1

Thought that's where I posted. Just moved it.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/01/17 10:19 PM
1

Puts it in perspective
/r/askMRP21/01/17 06:26 AM
1

Yup
/r/askMRP21/01/17 06:25 AM
1

Lol. I'll call 1800Flowers now and hook you up
/r/askMRP21/01/17 06:25 AM
1

Haha. Ban accepted. Definitely guilty of caring. It's a bumpy road but I'm keeping the wheel as steady as I can.
/r/askMRP21/01/17 06:24 AM
1

Amen
/r/askMRP21/01/17 06:23 AM
1

Right on
/r/askMRP21/01/17 06:23 AM
1

Makes sense
/r/askMRP21/01/17 06:22 AM
1

I think I'll associate flowers with me using it to negotiate desire, so there's a good chance I won't buy them again - not for a very long time at least.
/r/askMRP21/01/17 06:21 AM
1

Agree. Everyone here saved me from ordering. Appreciated.
/r/askMRP21/01/17 06:20 AM
1

That'd be rad. Gym time will be sacred though. I love the concept of beta bait. Easy to remember to help me hold frame.
/r/askMRP21/01/17 06:19 AM
1

I'll jump into the OYS thread. Thanks man.
/r/askMRP21/01/17 06:18 AM
1

Nah. Came here to get walked off the cliff. Glad I did.
/r/askMRP21/01/17 06:13 AM
3

Understood. Thanks dudes
/r/askMRP21/01/17 06:13 AM
2

Guilty as charged. Appreciate the wake up call.
/r/askMRP21/01/17 06:10 AM
2

Maybe a little. But not near as much as before. I'll get there. Appreciate the tough words.
/r/askMRP20/01/17 10:18 PM
1

More beta weight to lose. I agree.
/r/askMRP20/01/17 10:17 PM
1

Alright. How can I play it the right way then and not be a piece of shit but also "not care"?
/r/askMRP20/01/17 10:16 PM
1

Yup. You nailed it. Trying not to Rambo this because she's used to polar opposite. But you're correct in saying that I still care. I'll work on this.
/r/askMRP20/01/17 09:57 PM
1

Flowers aren't happening. Points well taken - thanks
/r/askMRP20/01/17 09:54 PM
2

Truth
/r/askMRP20/01/17 08:18 PM
1

Outside of still initiating and not sending flowers, how else would you handle this?
/r/askMRP20/01/17 08:16 PM
2

Excellent points - thank you. Still shedding some nice guy weight with the little ways I'm trying to be overly considerate.
/r/askMRP20/01/17 08:15 PM
3

I don't mind the shitting on it. You are right to call me out. I'm better than I was, but def not there yet. Appreciate it man.
/r/askMRP20/01/17 08:13 PM
1

Sounds like there's consensus about flowers, so those are off. I didn't care she was cold (described that above) - but it sounds like I'm overthinking this a bit. Thanks for the tough words.
/r/askMRP20/01/17 07:42 PM
5

I didn't feel guilty. Just grateful she still made breakfast and didn't complain about me proceeding as normal. Feel like it's a good time for positive reinforcement and a show of gratitude with some flowers.
/r/askMRP20/01/17 07:38 PM
1

How does she react to you going out for a couple of hours? Does she translate that as butt hurt?
/r/askMRP19/01/17 01:12 PM
1

This response rules. Thank you. So would you keep it or end it then?
/r/askMRP19/01/17 12:39 AM
2

I play already but the point is well taken and appreciated. And I can always up my guitar game :) Thanks man
/r/askMRP18/01/17 08:04 PM
2

Just looking for suggestions of movies with good RP characters to learn from and emulate.
/r/askMRP18/01/17 08:03 PM
1

That's a great way to look at. Thanks man
/r/askMRP18/01/17 01:06 PM
1

For 10 yrs prior, I made a pretty great plow horse. True this.
/r/askMRP17/01/17 10:17 PM
0

Thanks man. This may be my fave advice in this thread as much as I've enjoyed initiating daily. I'll think about giving it a rest for a week or so. What's your take on ending scheduled sex? End it (if so how)? Keep it?
/r/askMRP17/01/17 10:17 PM
1

Yeah she definitely hasn't been lucky past 10 yrs. Looking to change that tho.
/r/askMRP17/01/17 10:15 PM
0

Ups and downs for sure. She's swearing at me one minute (she has never sworn until I started down this path), but be then she'll very respectful, agree to tasks I request, cook all the meals (this very new and very nice) and generally seem in much better spirits around me most of the time - even shortly after her little blowups.
/r/askMRP17/01/17 07:00 PM
2

See some of my comments above, I'd love insight about flawlessly executing the ending of scheduled sex.
/r/askMRP17/01/17 06:57 PM
2

Glad to hear that success story. I'll stick with it. With regard to scheduled sex, its sounding like a pretty large consensus here that I end that. The question is: how? I am sure my wife will want to "talk about it" and it will really set the hamster. I want to flawlessly execute the end of the scheduled sex. Do I do it ON the day? A couple days before? Day after (cuz it'll likely be starfish and she may think about that if I end it day after).
/r/askMRP17/01/17 06:56 PM
2

Stay strong. You're not alone. Can you link that post you're referring to?
/r/askMRP17/01/17 06:53 PM
1

Probably a few (<5) each day - I'm going to go out of my way to interact with more. My wife knows I can charm/sweet talk my way into or out of any situation. She told me she and her friends joked that whoever married me would get all kinds of deals and special privileges. I'll have to wield that sword more often.
/r/askMRP17/01/17 06:52 PM
2

Thanks man. Staying with it. I love the changes thus far.
/r/askMRP17/01/17 06:47 PM
1

Truth.
/r/askMRP17/01/17 06:47 PM
2

Appreciated. I can definitely tell she is fishing for apologies constantly - wanting me to take responsibility for her feeelz. Any additional insight on handling the apology demands would be welcomed.
/r/askMRP17/01/17 06:46 PM
2

I agree. I'm in it for the long haul. Not expecting overnight changes but this does feel more positive.
/r/askMRP17/01/17 06:44 PM
1

I agree. Thoughts on best way to cancel and tips on maintaining frame when I do?
/r/askMRP17/01/17 06:44 PM
2

How do I cancel it? I want to make sure I maintain frame and need to be ready for the "why?" and "I don't want to cancel it" comments that she'll throw.
/r/askMRP17/01/17 06:43 PM
1

This nails it, thank you. I love the kiss on the head idea. A lot of people in this thread are saying to abandon the scheduled sex. Your thoughts? I am definitely open to do that, but want to do it the right way. I've always seen it kinda like a scheduled couples massage - but I do think it's giving her reason to resist every other day I initiate (which is almost every day at this point).
/r/askMRP17/01/17 06:42 PM
5

Yup. Makes sense. Can't fix 10 years in 2 months.
/r/askMRP17/01/17 06:37 PM
3

Gold. Thanks man. OI has been my weak point during the transition and I am highly focused on slaying that dragon. Yesterday I feel like I did well. And I can tell how shocked she is when I wake up the next morning and STILL go to the gym, STILL shower/shave/make sure I'm attractive, and STILL take care of shit overall. Hopefully the hamster moves to a sprint and sex life improves as the journey continues.
/r/askMRP17/01/17 06:36 PM
0

I've been thinking about this and will continue. What I want is already coming to fruition, which is to NGAF about what anyone thinks and go after what I want. That's been the most freeing thing about this journey so far. I was so caught up in pleasing others (my wife at the top of the list) that I was a total doormat. Beyond that, I'll keep pondering your question.
/r/askMRP15/01/17 01:41 PM
1

This is gold. I believe red pill Rambo has been a key issue for me that's prompted my wife to really question what is happening instead of appreciate the changes. I'll dig around but if anyone has specific posts or specifics on taking it slow, I'd love suggestions.
/r/askMRP15/01/17 01:39 PM
1

It's not her, it's me. Years of beta and nice guy is what leads to these sorts of posts and problems. Be grateful and sacrifice a chicken, yes. But mostly just don't get complacent and start putting your wife on a pedestal or you'll be posting something like this in a few years. I don't see that happening for you though - keep up the good work.
/r/askMRP15/01/17 01:36 PM
1

Appreciate it
/r/askMRP15/01/17 01:33 PM
1

Agreed. When she makes comments about being equal in leadership or me making decisions I've mostly ignored, STFU and she has let it go.
/r/askMRP15/01/17 01:33 PM
0

Definitely have more reading to do, you're right. So you're saying keep the scheduled for now while I get myself in shape? Not much weight to lose (ran 50 miles per week religiously), it's bulk and definition that I'm now going to add by lifting.
/r/askMRP15/01/17 01:31 PM
1

Harsh words are good for the soul. Thanks man. I absolutely know that 2 months won't change 10 years and I'm in this for the long haul.
/r/askMRP15/01/17 01:26 PM
1

I've read up on monk mode and I'm doing most of it already - I will highly consider doing it full blown. If I did, does that mean no sex with my wife for 3-6 mos? What I read about monk mode, it didn't seem to address that.
/r/askMRP15/01/17 01:25 PM
1

Read it - thank you. I'll be ready.
/r/askMRP14/01/17 12:22 AM
1

Could scheduled sex be seen in the same way as scheduling a poker night or a weekly spa appointment or whatever? I wonder if I could initiate on these nights and if she doesn't seem into it (she often isn't) then I can just STFU and do something else? Showing that I don't "require" this weekly scheduled sex as necessary fuel for my week and the precious gift she thinks she's bestowing?
/r/askMRP13/01/17 11:37 PM
1

This is the first I've heard of a main event. I'll be ready to maintain frame.
/r/askMRP13/01/17 11:30 PM
1

I've watched some kino stuff but this is great - I'll watch it now. I've been touching her throughout the day and it's been awesome. The fact that's she's been allowing that (something she resisted always during my nice guy years) is a good step.
/r/askMRP13/01/17 11:30 PM
2

Bro you don't even know my level of loserhood. I whined, complained, took the path of least resistance at every turn. She saw me as a little boy and rightly so. This has been a real shocker to her. I appreciate the thoughts and I do think it will take some time. I've been working on not caring, and I can see that she finds it more attractive. I've done a terrible job of initiating the past couple times and I think that was on her mind when she commented. I didn't take it personally. Just let it …
/r/askMRP13/01/17 11:27 PM
2

yeah. I'm on the fence about scheduling. I'll ponder this. I've definitely upped the suggestive touching and I can tell she's been way more OK with that than she was before because she sees that I'm being more of a man around in life and around the house. Good idea about doing something I want in the morning.
/r/askMRP13/01/17 11:23 PM
2

Solid. I'll try this one as frame strengthens.
/r/askMRP13/01/17 11:19 PM
5

Welcome to the asshole club
/r/askMRP13/01/17 11:18 PM
3

Thanks man, good stuff. I actually did consider it a badge of honor. Especially since she is such a goody goody and never swears. I'm definitely flipping the script and that's exciting. I much prefer that to the old "be a man" or "stop being a baby" that I'd get in my beta days. In response to your questions I'm in OK shape (I've always been a runner), not a FF at all - gym is taking me to a new level tho. I've always paid the bills and run the finances department. She's a SAHM and I do well wit…
/r/askMRP13/01/17 11:18 PM
1

Is this something that could be discussed with the wife (us time and me time)? Or just implied without discussion?
/r/askMRP13/01/17 08:43 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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