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Alpha_Aries Archive

View 29 posts and 630 comments by Alpha_Aries on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
448

MOOD FOR LIFEAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 01:06 AM
383

STRATEGYAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/21 07:50 PM
371

PICKME CULTUREAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/20 08:53 PM
330

REMINDER 👑Alpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/21 08:17 PM
240

ROAST-A-SCROTEAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 04:27 PM
240

MINDSET SHIFTAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/21 05:05 AM
236

DISCUSSIONAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 04:27 AM
234

SCROTATION REPORT Alpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 06:16 AM
196

FLIRTING TIPSAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/21 09:29 PM
174

MALE DEPRAVITYAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/21 07:13 AM
172

Alpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/21 06:42 PM
157

MINDSET SHIFTAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/21 07:28 AM
131

LIES MEN TELLAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/01/21 08:52 PM
93

REMINDER 👑Alpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 05:04 AM
92

MINDSET SHIFTAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/20 06:20 AM
85

FDS HUMORAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/20 01:26 AM
81

WHOLESOME CONTENTAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 04:45 AM
76

STAY WOKEAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 06:35 AM
74

DISCUSSIONAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 04:12 AM
39

TRIGGER WARNINGAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 08:32 AM
36

QUEEN SH*TAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/21 07:24 PM
28

NAH, SISAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 05:25 PM
14

DISCUSSIONAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 04:59 PM
11

FDS MOVIES & TVAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 10:04 PM
6

PICKME CULTUREAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/21 07:14 PM
1

SEEKING ADVICEAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 09:10 AM
1

DISCUSSIONAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 04:33 AM
1

ROAST-A-SCROTEAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 06:09 PM
1

STRATEGYAlpha_Aries/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/21 08:03 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
2

To start, Google “marijuana induced psychosis”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/22 06:10 AM
53

Two hams wtf 💀
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/22 08:03 PM
25

Can you do this in a marriage?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/21 05:46 PM
23

Match and OkCupid. I live in a large U.S. city which also helps.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/21 05:10 AM
61

I love this. Since FDS and a year of inner work, I have kept pretty much a steady stream of fun, interesting, dinner dates with men I am attracted to. 90% don’t work out past one or two dates, but I have fun on the dates anyway, have good conversation, and great food. I’ve had 3 dates with 3 different men at nice restaurants in the same weekend before. I’m never going back to dating the old way. 🥰
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/21 04:02 AM
29

Dude what. That is the dumbest thing to get mad about. Lmao. Pee in the bushes girl. Who cares?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/21 12:23 AM
40

I’m DEAD SIS 💀💀💀🤣🤣🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/21 05:03 PM
1

Lmaooo 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/21 05:35 AM
48

Yes sis - I ain’t putting my cooking skills on display for any regular dude! Unseasoned, dry, burnt microwave popcorn. 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 09:38 PM
16

I hear “loyal” from BM so much that it feels like a mass group gaslighting towards BW. Meanwhile BW in my life I’ve seen put up with soooo much and are literally there to pick up the pieces for everyone around them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 08:45 PM
16

🤣🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 08:39 PM
49

When I was 16 I broke up with a guy on Valentine’s Day. 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 08:38 PM
75

Yesss, I love the passage where she’s advising readers what to cook - she specifically says to not worry if you burn the popcorn. 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 07:35 PM
58

Omg I didn’t even think of that. You’re so right.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 07:52 AM
57

Omg that’s hilarious 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 06:34 AM
165

This is a perceptive young budding queen, wise beyond her years (likely from reading FDS-esque wisdom online!) Another one bites the dust! What a crusty-ass dad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 06:32 AM
2

After I told a scrote of my plans to buy a house: “Lol. You’re going to buy a house alone, or with your partner?” 🙄 I’m on a dating site, so obviously that means I’m single, so yes, I’ll be purchasing it alone. On OkCupid you can answer personality questions. I’ve answered a couple hundred. One scrote goes “I’ve never seen a woman answer so many questions. You must be either very serious, or extremely bored/jobless. Correct me if I’m wrong.” LOL the audacity. B*tch if you think I’m jobless and b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 05:36 AM
15

I hate this word too, lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 04:55 AM
64

Ugh. Needed to read this today. I blocked and deleted a very affectionate, tall dark n handsome scrote recently who I was very attracted to. However, he was pushy about my physical boundaries (which is why I blocked and deleted). Today I’m wanting some sex so bad, even though we never had sex. LOL. I must stay strong 💪
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/21 09:49 PM
62

Men assume I’m straight. Bringing up my bisexuality in the past has led to them either eventually forgetting I’m bi (maybe they think they “converted” me to straight?) or saying they think it’s hot that I’m bi and being thirsty and gross. I just don’t tell men I’m bi anymore…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/21 09:31 PM
58

Had a guy tell me he wasn’t interested in dating me because he didn’t want to “end up like Ross from friends.” Good, I don’t want to date someone homophobic anyway.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/21 09:29 PM
261

My male “friends” kept crushing on me, being emotionally needy, and projecting their resentment onto me. They are the true drama queens Also, I felt like a bad feminist for not really cracking into my internalized misogyny. I was bad at making friends with women because of it. Years later, I’ve done so much work. I have all girlfriends and a whopping single male friend who has a long term girlfriend. I still don’t talk to him like I would a female friend.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/21 09:27 PM
53

Remember when guys would get hard if you just smiled at them? Sigh…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/21 01:06 AM
25

Yeah I put grey-ace and demisexual on my profile to weed out impatient scrotes, and that gets rid of a good handful, I’m guessing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 09:08 PM
11

You see this everywhere on popular subreddits (even socialist/leftist subs coughcough ant1w0rk coughcough), where men JUMP on the chance to call a woman sexist, sexually violent insults because she was rude.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 08:37 PM
9

Hugs. It’s also ok to take a break from dating. I’ve never been through what you’re going through, but a friend of mine lost her dad when she was a teenager. It took her almost 10 years to move through that grief. Be gentle with yourself
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/21 05:42 PM
13

Maybe you can say what happened to her, but keep your deeper feelings about it to a therapist
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/21 12:35 PM
104

This is so scary! 😢 glad you’re ok! Cops are on my no-date list due to stories and statistics like these.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/21 11:59 AM
61

It’s the “I’m a victim” eyes
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/21 09:50 PM
-1

What an absolute nerd
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/21 04:35 PM
156

Omg some of them do this, hoping that YOULL ask THEM out for dinner! “I’ll be in your city this weekend……..” “Cool, have fun” Then never asks you out. 🚫🚫🚫
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/21 03:15 AM
82

OP — I would like to share this, like… everywhere. Is that ok? Also don’t forget to lock down your account to protect from scrotes!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/21 11:25 PM
1

Oh my goodness, such a funny and helpful episode. Loved it, as per usual. Y’all always brighten my day! Question for Lilith: when you slyly mention to your friends things that you find unattractive about certain men (but you’re really talking about THEIR man), how do you not make it sound passive aggressive? I would worry someone would know immediately I was talking about them but being passive aggressive about it, lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/21 07:12 PM
15

Sounds like this post is not for you, and that’s ok!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/10/21 12:19 PM
20

Omg, you captured this kind of moment I was talking about perfectly. Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/10/21 02:10 AM
57

Valid! I could’ve done a better job of explaining this scenario in the post. Obviously the pornsick guys make themselves known fairly early on, making you feel uncomfortable with the pervy comments. Here, this was a man I had been dating a while. I sent him a pic from my bed of my TV screen with a movie playing on it. I think he said it in a sweet “wish I was there with you” kind of way instead of a “😛😛😉😉 wish I could crawl up in that bed with you huehuehue” kinda pervy way, lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/10/21 12:05 AM
33

Thank you! 🥰 maybe I should flesh it out more to define what the levels of safety mean and what kinds of things to engage in when you’re ready for him to access another layer of safety. You’re right. A man being angry with you wanting to slow things down has made his entitlement to you loud and clear. Having a strong self-esteem —- that I truly don’t mind if he exits my life —- is key. Yes! We have to be careful not to UHAUL men we feel physically safe with! In the past, a man I felt physically …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/21 10:10 PM
17

I think it's normal to feel jealous when thinking of your partner with someone else. You're right that an HVM will self-soothe. I'm saying that I'd like to avoid him having to do that self-soothing in the first place. Out of respect for my partner, I'd like to avoid putting him in uncomfortable situations. If it comes up and it can't be helped, of course I expect him to be able to get past it or break it off.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/21 09:34 PM
32

People who have these hoe phases and feel OK about it don’t need to go around preaching about it. I know a gal who tells every man she’s been with about all of her past escapades because she wants to be with someone who “accepts every part of [her].” She pretends that she feels empowered by this, but there’s always an air of guilt/shame, like she needs to ‘fess up about her “sins.” Look… whether we’ve had a hoe phase or not, there’s no need to go to confessional for it. Let the past be the past.…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/21 08:01 PM
26

I absolutely love that FDS has memorable slogans like that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/21 09:39 PM
59

One of my friends said “if he wanted to, he would,” and I was like 👀👀 either she’s on FDS, or these principles are infiltrating mainstream media!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/21 09:27 PM
7

Out of curiosity, which countries?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 01:33 AM
2

🤣🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 12:22 AM
17

Allow me to forgo the nyeh heh heh
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 07:48 PM
13

Yep… I should’ve taken it as a red flag that my NV ex was the most gossipy b**** in the office (we were coworkers). Anytime he and I had issues and fought, the whole office knew about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 04:19 PM
8

Men REALLY hate when women get to speak their minds without fear of the male gaze.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 06:24 PM
22

So funny. Do you know what this is from?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/21 03:08 PM
3

I really wish I could find the full Dr. dines/ Ron Jeremy debate somewhere!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 02:38 AM
22

What’s a good way to stay safe in old age if your HVM dies and you start showing dementia symptoms? Or some other disease where you’re “not all there.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 09:55 PM
76

Yeah she is dangerous. I wouldn’t be her friend IRL
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/21 01:10 AM
229

I went for dinner and two-step dancing with a scrote. Whilst his hand is on my back, he goes, “that’s just my hand there, not trying to unhook your bra or anything.” 🤡 Before getting back into his car, he leaned me over the hood, trying to “seduce” me into kissing him I guess??? I was so freaked out and ready to go home. That was when I decided to never accept a car ride from a guy again on the first few dates.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/21 01:02 AM
172

At 19 I was “ethically nonmonogamous”, but had lots of unresolved trauma. So there’s a lot of that too
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 08:13 PM
64

AIDS is different in the U.S. I believe. Other diseases, not so much
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 03:14 PM
126

“Decent looking” = unattractive
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/21 04:51 PM
17

Kyles do have juicy booties But poor personalities 🥴
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/21 04:29 AM
19

Yes. You could also find out you have a panic disorder. Not fun having a panic attack while on these 😢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/21 04:28 AM
13

Dude… you’re so right that it’s embarrassing I am learning Spanish. Dated a guy for a bit who grew up in a Mexican household with parents who ONLY speak Spanish, so I figured, hey, he must be knowledgeable about Spanish. This man’s first language was English 🤡 I was in shock that he didn’t know his parents’ language 😢 he had to take Spanish in high school to communicate with his mother. He had all older sisters too, so I wonder if he was the spoiled, “golden son.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/21 04:22 AM
7

This sounds like a date. But I would continue dating others.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 10:26 PM
10

I recommend reading Why Men Love Bitches by Sherry Argov. :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 10:24 PM
24

All of this, plus, he doesn’t have a good rapping voice…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 10:21 PM
11

Do you think he’s secretly attracted to you? 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 05:53 PM
9

A good reason for block and delete, even before giving them a proper rejection. 🤷🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 04:33 PM
17

Omg RBG, Cher, then Harris with the banner saying “first black woman VP” in succession was 🥺 you almost got me, OP
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 04:28 PM
45

Their someday was 35, max.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 03:44 PM
51

It’s ok. They hide that shit really well. My ex had a coke and e addiction. My intuition was giving me a stomachache, but I couldn’t figure out WHY. There was no evidence.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 03:25 PM
106

Not Keanu 🥺
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 02:24 AM
55

Because THEY are the ones who start the drama, sleep with all the men, then call a new woman in one of the men’s lives “crazy”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 02:18 AM
70

I’ve seen an 8-incher or two in my day… game-changer!! 😩
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 01:17 AM
278

✔️ doesn’t clean ✔️ stank ass ✔️ CHEATER ✔️ liar ✔️ lazy Keep this post for when you’re feeling weak and lonely. Throw the whole man away!! 🚮 you will be thriving sooner than you think!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 01:15 AM
101

Grandma was right!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 01:12 AM
11

Oh, yum yum! 🤢😭
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/21 02:24 AM
6

No, i agree with you, but only after trust has been established. I think one thing emojis do is convey playful or flirtatious tones, but I don’t want to convey those tones until he has earned them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 10:55 PM
53

His fingers probably taste like dirt and salt 🤢 even without the Cheeto dust LOL
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 06:56 PM
2

I see. At this stage, I’m just practicing FDS strategies more than seriously dating, and hoping to have fun along the way. Thanks for the good convo!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 04:37 PM
33

Interesting! I’ve never heard of that before. The past year or so, I’ve been taking the approach of believing what a man tells me about himself. “I’m boring / an asshole / not good enough for you” means he’s telling me to stay away. Even he knows I shouldn’t lower my standards for him! 😇
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 04:35 PM
1

Ah… so you’re saying this was a 1/10 time, haha. I’ll keep doing what I’m doing!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 04:10 PM
2

Was there anything that seemed to influence getting dinner offers? Type of guy? Way you held yourself?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 03:43 PM
6

Hmm. I thought about what you said, and I think I may have an unconscious belief that my age group (late 20s) will not offer dinner. But, I shouldn’t even entertain the idea unless I know I’m going to have fun, and it won’t feel like a chore, like you said. Gonna try this again, lol. Getting my ass handed to me by more experienced women = one of the reasons I come to FDS. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 03:32 PM
4

OKCupid!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 03:00 PM
22

Hahaha I like emojis too! But no emojis for men I barely know. 😇
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 02:48 PM
35

“Do you want to talk on the phone first?” “Do you want to FaceTime tonight?” Lol Any decent guy will respect this. I don’t give my justification. If he asks why, I would probably unmatch.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 02:47 PM
10

I’m never too honest in my answer of what I’m looking for. I usually go with the handbook answer.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 02:45 PM
32

Also, swipe left on men whose profiles use their race as a main selling point.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 08:12 PM
17

Needed to be said! I agree completely. PickMes are shocked when I tell them I don’t have any male friends. I have male coworkers I’m friendly with, but I don’t talk to them outside of work, lol. I sometimes lie and say I’m “open to male friendship” if a decent one comes along. I don’t need the gaslighting. Also, I used to be a PickMe who slept with her male “friends,” and now that I don’t want to have that lifestyle anymore, I’ve blocked and deleted any male I’ve slept with. Don’t keep them on t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 05:24 PM
23

“Astrology for men” - brilliant.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 04:32 PM
13

Don’t forget to block and delete! He will come crawling back.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 04:30 PM
58

Shame on you, Texas government, and shame on the Supreme Court justices who allowed this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 03:54 PM
314

I always report their profiles.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 03:43 PM
43

It’s also useful to listen and alert the women in the LVM’s life (if he’s cheating on his wife, for instance). I always pretend to be their friend and listen to their dumb shit, then completely narc on them 😁
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 03:31 PM
21

Solid tips! Especially about frequent messaging. I will respond twice a day, tops, and he needs to ask me out within a week.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 06:28 AM
15

Ew, don’t let this man around little girls. I hate the way he talks about them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 10:04 PM
11

“Penile shortening due to health conditions” Wat? The only thing I can think of is weight gain.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 05:44 PM
226

Seriously. 90% of the time my (female) friends go “awwww!” like it’s sweet that a guy is a virgin. The WORST I’ve heard was “I don’t want to sleep with a virgin because I’m afraid he will get emotionally attached to me.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 04:14 PM
38

My high school bf’s girlfriends after me all. Looked. Like. Me. 💀 and had very similar personalities.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 04:43 AM
33

The ones who actually read the Bible, in my experience, are reasonable and forgiving people… …like Jesus was! Whaddaya know!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 06:02 PM
21

Umm… no. LVM are bad in different ways, but being a Nazi is still very fringe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 06:00 PM
84

I know a radfem queen who will stand up and say, “excuse me, you’ve been talking way too much. Let other people speak.” 👏👏
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 05:53 PM
52

I love the episode of Cocomelon with the itsy bitsy spider, and the spider doesn’t die or get squashed by the kids. 🥺 I wish all kids were taught kindness to all creatures! There’s no need to squash a bug unless it’s a danger to you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 05:51 PM
31

USA is absolutely massive compared to Iceland. Harder to unite the women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 06:32 PM
89

I imagined this in Gollum’s voice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 06:00 PM
2

Yeah I absolutely hate that. It’s crazy-making. Do you have any friends in the office on your side?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 05:42 PM
82

“Wyd” 🤢🤢🤢 SO LAZY
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 05:39 PM
10

Blegh. I hated this about certain industries I worked in. In tech, there seems to be more “girlboss” energy, so women tend to look fondly on straight talking and standing up for oneself. HOWEVER, in tech there are big issues with PickMe women who are Just One of the Guys TM. I try to remember there are women who are silently cheering you on. I get women telling me they admired how I was strong and straightforward in high school, and they saw me as a role model in some ways. This is what motivate…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 05:36 PM
29

Yep. Also, OP, the handbook advocates for women to never show their cards first. “What are you looking for?” You: “I’ll know it when I see it” and try to get him to put his cards on the table first. An LVM will just listen to what you say, then tell you what you want to hear so he can get in your pants.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 04:49 PM
47

Hmmm. I could see this being covered already with the “Libfem Logic” flair.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 05:22 AM
5

Aww sweetheart. I really just want to hug you!! I am pretty sure I had ptsd after moving out of my parents’ house, or something that would trigger emotional flashbacks, because those few years after moving out, I cried out so, so many emotions. It truly felt like grieving. Once you get deep into that trauma-informed therapy, I would just say to know that if you grieve really hard, that means you’re healing. When I cried, I would wrap my arms around my body. I’m grateful for my beautiful, strong …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 03:19 AM
13

Nah they just wanna colonize it and profit off it. Lolol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/21 07:29 AM
19

Dude. I’m a vegan. I dated a guy who listened to some of my opinions on veganism, then began doing regular, public monologues about the benefits of veganism. Including debating people on Facebook about it. He would even try to get people to go vegan. Was he vegan? Nope. It pissed me off to no end that he waxed poetic about how much he “”cared”” about the issue that I cared about, but he wasn’t willing to actually change his life. He just wanted to look cool and “woke.” This nails why I felt so m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/21 07:28 AM
3

You may not see it this way, but I think you helped him. What he chooses to do with your insight is up to him. But he could take that feedback and really make himself better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 08:23 PM
12

I absolutely love how she addresses lesbian sexuality. Too many bi/les women reenact patriarchal templates in relationships and the bedroom.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 08:11 PM
47

Imagine your children seeing their dad talk to you like this. Ultra cringe
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 07:41 PM
28

Hard agree with this post. Also, love your writing style! Ruthless and straight facts, with a distinct personality.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 06:24 PM
72

I literally just assume he will, but make sure to bring my wallet. Every man I’ve dated has always paid. Setting the expectations without a word — when the bill arrives, look at him and smile. Don’t make any sort of movement towards your wallet or apologetic facial expressions. Expect it. The men I’ve dated have seen my body language—that I expect him to pay—and have paid. I imagine if he asked me to split it, I’d say “oh,” slightly disappointed, then pay, finish the date, and block and delete l…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 06:03 PM
19

Ooooooof 🤌🏻
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 05:39 PM
196

Right. This actually shocked me. And the fact that he said it with pure confidence? He’s spoken to her like that before.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 03:55 PM
12

Very well put.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 05:42 AM
72

PickMes feed into the confirmation bias that sexist men already hold: “I don’t know what SHE’S talking about… iiiiii don’t deal with sexism.” 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 02:45 AM
199

Yep… narc supply people often have codependency traits they need to work on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 02:40 AM
3

Wow! Seems like Europe is willing to bend with the times. America digs their heels in when it comes to cultural norms. Unless it’s porn of course, because of the deep pockets of the industry
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 09:27 PM
3

Where did you move from?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 06:16 AM
32

I will literally screenshot the messages and send it to the mutual friend, saying “do you know this person?” LOL
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 02:59 AM
54

I’m bi but set my apps to “interested in women only.” I accidentally set it to Men and Women for about an hour before I realized my error. I got dozens of likes and one negging message from a scrote.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 02:32 AM
2

I feel like what men say to each other is a reflection of their true character…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 02:28 AM
3

Yeah some of it is starting to get old (I’m on the second to last episode). Like everyone keeps saying “we have a connection” instead of anything of substance 🙄 I guess he didn’t freak me out as much as Garratt, but that’s a good point. I don’t trust new Jared, either, tbh. (Sorry, Idk how to make spoiler tags on mobile!)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 09:45 PM
1

Omg. I'm in the second to last episode, and some of these men are absolute flaming piles of garbage. :| The things they will say about women dumbfound me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 09:20 PM
27

The lamp is the least of my worries from this photo.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 06:25 PM
3

Tru. At the end of the day, TV producers still have to make their money, I guess. Good show overall IMO.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 03:10 AM
6

Omg I hated that part. They gaslighted CJ into thinking that she “doesn’t trust anyone” when CASEY is the one who JOINED THE SHOW as an FBoy. He literally went into the show with opportunistic intentions and stuck by the guy who was playing two women (Garratt).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 01:50 AM
175

Imagine a white man calling himself a Black Panther. Cringe…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 11:18 PM
63

Many women do the dirty work of the patriarchy: surveillance and enforcement. If you don’t “fall in line” by tempering your language with a cautionary NAMALT, they risk being guilty by association: guilty of being a bad woman, and bad women don’t get the so-called benefits from pandering to men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 11:16 PM
2

Aww thank you! Your response was church. ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 10:55 PM
3

He would spread lies and even truths that I told him in confidence to coworkers. Then to the PickMes at work he would say disrespectful things behind my back, making me look like I was ok with that kind of treatment. Then the classic, “I’m only working here because of a man’s help” lie. I truly could not trust anyone at work because he was charismatic (I was more quiet, private, and introverted). Then of course, after we broke up, I had to see him every day until I left. It was horrible and not …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 09:01 PM
5

The first (and only) time I dated a coworker, he made damn sure I regretted it for the rest of my days. Almost lost my job. Definitely lost my reputation. At least now I know I will never, ever do it again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 06:10 PM
26

Asked to rate their lives with each other, Dr Basavalingappa says he would give her "10 out of 10". Dakshayani laughs and says she will give him only 9.5. "Because you never ever found an occasion to assist me in the housework." Telling.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 05:34 PM
101

The amount of gaslighting you receive as a girl growing up with naturally strong boundaries is so insane. 😐
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 03:50 PM
15

Interested in your strategies!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 03:45 PM
140

If a man tells you who he is, believe him
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 06:36 AM
12

I’m snickering so hard at this 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/21 10:09 PM
68

This. I don’t talk to men about feminism either. I know there’s good arguments to talk to them about it, but I simply don’t want to waste my energy. Feminism is for women. FDS is for women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/21 03:40 PM
3

Omg “as soon as my probation is up” 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/21 03:35 PM
126

This type of man just needs to date other men and leave women alone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 04:35 PM
99

Do you ever get that cringey feeling when a guy is complimenting you? I do when they’re engaging in flattery, which is a red flag that they’re trying to get something out of you or get on your good side for some reason.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 04:34 PM
11

And the moobs
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 04:32 PM
78

Yes! Also, don’t give wife benefits without being a wife. (Living with a man who isn’t your husband).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 04:30 PM
20

Imagine being this much of a waste of space… just consuming, barely living.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 04:27 PM
144

Don’t forget to block and delete!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 04:26 PM
16

It is blatant, systemic sexism that we don’t get the option of two extra medical leave days a month.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 03:20 PM
103

Nagging for sex is a one-way trip to Contempt Town! Completely kills my interest.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 04:29 AM
22

Oat milk is my fav. Creamy and naturally sweet!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 10:53 PM
27

Iced blonde americano with oat milk and stevia!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 09:34 PM
37

The handbook mentions this type of scenario. It’s good to figure out WHY you’re on the fence about him. Then, when he asks you to be official / exclusive, tell him why you’re on the fence. An HVM will meet your needs or respectfully dip out if he feels he can’t meet them. An LVM will argue, neg, or lie
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 06:24 PM
54

Love this. ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 06:12 PM
170

I reported sooo many of their vids just now. Looks like the one mentioned above was removed, but there are still other hateful ones about fat women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 02:41 PM
11

Fantastic idea!! Stealing!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 03:30 AM
30

Fantastic idea. I think I’ll ask for a more modest ring, then a good piece of property in my name.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 02:17 AM
57

“She cleaned up my piss, she must want the D.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 02:01 AM
46

I would just give him a dirty look. Then if he tries to get you in trouble with other family members, you can deny it, lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 02:00 AM
65

This. As soon as he said “what’s your name?” is when I would have put my headphones back in without another word.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 06:41 PM
1

Im a couple years removed from a live-in relationship with a man baby as well… do you have anything that helps you move on and grow? Also what are some of the lingering effects you’ve noticed? Sorry if this is too personal
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 04:13 PM
2

This is a really good catch — that small distinction that “type A” is relative is important for the patriarchy’s shifting goalposts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 04:09 PM
1

I think in this situation, I would get a male ally on board to say something instead of saying something myself. It really helps to befriend a well-liked fellow who has solid morals, and tell him it made you uncomfortable, and would he be willing to say something next time? Male allies at work are awesome!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 04:04 PM
42

The world is missing 14 women engineers/scientists because of this scum. 😢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 03:29 PM
11

Dude I’m so pissed that Emma still allows her children to be around their dad. Sickening
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 02:55 PM
9

I was thinking dumb fox would be the way to go here, but I wanted to ask others who may be better at answering this!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 04:59 PM
8

I am reading “Singled Out” by Bella DePaulo. There are studies that show that marriage has very little effect on baseline happiness. People get married, peak for a year or two, then go back to their baseline. So, people who are happy in their marriages and never divorce were generally happy people before they ever got married. I try to remember that married people get lonely too. And actually, people who place too much value on marriage tend to feel lonelier when they realize their marriage does…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 04:24 AM
3

Women of Impact!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 04:19 AM
27

THAT type of boyfriend will rant his opinions at you enough times that you know he remembers he told you 5 times already. He just likes hearing himself talk and having a female audience.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 03:48 AM
24

This. I definitely don’t discount the fact that beautiful people obtain certain privileges that unattractive people don’t. I think the lesson is to be empathetic to other women, believe each other when we share struggles, and remember the reasons we struggle.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 04:32 PM
25

Aww. I’m sure you’re doing great raising her to be confident and hold her head high! It helps if she has some badass girlfriends who have her back, too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 02:36 PM
142

It’s something that doesn’t get talked about enough. If you are tall and very beautiful, you are stared at. A lifetime of being stared at will make you dress down, cast your eyes down, wonder what’s wrong with yourself. It’s no wonder it leads to low self esteem. Then you have a very hard time making friends because people are jealous or make assumptions that your life is easy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 12:33 PM
6

Single power! Don’t listen to anyone gaslighting your choice. It’s a valid one! ✊🏻
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 04:13 AM
8

Yes! I am a major sap. I love weddings and love stories. But I am really really on the fence about dating, and have been for over a year. A lot of people don’t realize you can separate these things…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 03:45 AM
8

:( oh my goodness. Is she safe?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 03:43 AM
11

Tru. I am childfree but love to be around my family members who are babies, and I love kids.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 03:31 AM
156

Men LOVE that independent women don’t need financial help and aren’t clingy. They HATE that independent women also come with opinions, strength, and zero tolerance for foolery. We also are happy enough staying single that if you’re trash, we’ll veto you. 🤷🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 03:23 AM
53

My first thought!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 12:35 PM
6

Lol, I’ve seen a couple theories as to why people are standoffish. One is that many PNW locals descend from Nordic countries, which have more introverted people than other cultures. The other is the constant cloudiness / lack of sun. I did notice that the weather made me calmer.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 03:38 PM
19

Being extremely standoffish, not inviting new people out to do things, then when you finally do get them out, they’ll say “we should do this again!” and they commence the CA flake. It was extremely hard to make friends in the PNW. no one wants to hang out. No one is welcoming to new people (except other new people).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 12:25 PM
3

I am soooo relieved Gigi left him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 03:53 AM
6

Or a girdle 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 03:42 AM
2

Good for you! They better handle it so they don’t lose your loyal business. I would have absolutely done the same thing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 02:51 AM
5

You’re beautiful and clean and worthy. Believe me if you don’t believe in yourself!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 01:07 AM
51

Me too! I found FDS over a year ago when I googled “fuck buddy” after having terrible sex with a LVM hookup. I have been celibate and leveling up since then! My life is so good, and I am at peace. I have no desire to date or have sex right now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 12:31 AM
55

I feel this post! You sound like a great friend. I’m also in CA, but NoCal, so maybe the vibe is a little different here? Either way, I’m used to the Pacific Northwest flavor of flaking, which is the worst I’ve seen in my travels. Maybe I lucked out here and just found a couple good people who want to be consistent and honest, also two traits I require (at least, of friends nearby. I understand long distance friendships will flux a little more in consistent communication). Anyway, I am at the po…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 12:24 AM
23

Panic disorder, too
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 07:27 PM
94

Omg I was reading it in an Alabama one, lol. “Hooting and hollering” 😂❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 07:18 PM
19

Great post!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 07:12 PM
4

Love this! Hahaha
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 04:44 AM
5

A lot of the times, people like this are pushy, entitled, and disrespectful of personal boundaries outside of the bedroom as well. I dated another woman for a few months. She seriously expected to begin physical intimacy on the first date. I was constantly pumping the brakes. Eventually it got to where I doubted my own sex drive. I thought I might be ace. We ended things because she would call me while I was working, in the middle of the day, and demand I answer the phone and talk things out wit…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 03:49 PM
4

I just assumed that a lot of PickMes flock to male dominated activities 😬 (I was really into “nerd” culture for several years, and holy hell, the PickMes!)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 02:53 AM
14

🤣🤣🤣🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 02:36 AM
2

This is me, and I’m not even 30 yet…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/21 08:48 PM
47

I think it’s important if a guy grows up with strong sisters. He gets this practice early. I check my older brother from time to time, and he seems to respect his wife when she does, too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 02:51 PM
4

No, I did not say men are more prone towards overconfidence. But here is one of many sources I found that shows some personality traits have a strong genetic link. That was my actual argument. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3030621/ All it took was a Google search. 🤷🏻‍♀️In no way am I justifying patriarchy. I am stating that personality is not 100% nurture.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 04:58 PM
8

Great article! And was surprised to see it written by a man. Quite insightful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 11:46 AM
-4

Yes, but also, some personality traits have a strong genetic link
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 11:45 AM
12

Spotify!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 04:55 AM
6

This is pretty handy, but I’m talking about telling if a guy is overweight with clothes on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 06:32 PM
17

I’m not good at telling if a guy is overweight, especially if his clothes fit him well. Any ladies have any tips?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 06:06 PM
6

Why hasn’t he asked you out?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 05:39 PM
20

Thank you, feminists of yore!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 03:06 PM
4

Thank you queen!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/04/21 03:13 AM
46

This literally happened with my ex. I couldn’t remember exactly what happened, but it was something like we weren’t able to get a reservation somewhere, and there was no parking. He was visibly very stressed: more stressed than what was appropriate for the situation. When I asked what was wrong, he said “I just hate that feeling of being inconvenienced,” and I literally had to check his face to see if he was kidding. I almost burst out laughing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/04/21 05:34 PM
9

Queen energy right here. ☝🏻
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/04/21 03:09 PM
1

Congrats, and thanks for sharing your story. Were you single the whole time?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 05:41 AM
92

Recommended strategies for super green users: read handbook, observe for a month or two. Then jump in if you’d like. When I was new in July, sometimes I’d read a post I agreed with, then the more experienced users would break it down in the comments. This would surprise me sometimes. Well, misogyny can be deep, nuanced, and in a very convincing mask. Be open-minded. Ask a question if you don’t understand something, but only after you’ve read the handbook and lurked for a month or two.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 07:33 PM
5

What do you mean by they’ve killed of the best men?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 05:15 AM
4

A-allowance? Noooooooooooooooooooooooo
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 05:04 AM
10

You don’t sound like a PickMe at all. We brag about green flag behavior here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 05:02 AM
59

males are really out here not understanding the following about why r*pe is so upsetting to girls/women: let's start with the obvious stuff. men/boys are 99% of the time physically stronger. //////////////////////////////TW assault I've been in a fight with a girl my age, and I've been pinned down by a young man my age. The fight with the girl was nothing like being pinned by the man. I could escape the pulls and grabs from the girl, but SPEAK truly captures what it's like to be grabbed and held…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/21 07:00 PM
1

lmaoooo this makes sense!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/21 05:23 AM
13

When I was 18, I went to the laundromat to do my laundry. I lived on my own. A man in a wheelchair asked me to help him get his clothes out of the dryer. I said I'll call the number posted on the sign for assistance, and several times refused his requests. He got REALLY mad and wheeled out. I was really suspicious of that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 06:02 PM
28

Omg the hosts are so funny, well-spoken, and seem like great company.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 07:04 PM
3

Have you read the handbook?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 05:26 PM
43

85%... SMH.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 05:32 AM
16

i'll add something i haven't seen in this thread. if you don't want to, you don't have to. you don't have to have concrete reasoning.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 05:22 AM
78

We believe you
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 04:45 AM
40

Pickmes can also be dangerous to other women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/03/21 05:35 PM
8

Oh wow, which options? Do you know?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/03/21 12:48 AM
11

Baby raccoons!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 10:59 PM
2

that sounds lovely! just curious, would you ever have female roommates?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 08:27 AM
5

this is getting a bit out of hand.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/21 04:30 AM
15

i think i try to ask questions that don't project my own feelings onto them, but express curiosity about how they feel. (of course, this depends on how close i am to the person). even just asking "how" questions is good for them to just be honest and not put on a face, or just give a generic answer and move on. how are you feeling about being a new mom? how are things going? these are generic enough to not offend, and open enough to build more questions upon if they take kindly to your questions…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 07:27 AM
17

barffff at the marriage and kids questions. i now just act slightly offended and say "that's a personal question" (if it's a total stranger asking). with friends i might feel comfortable answering these questions.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 07:14 AM
32

ooo. this might be hitting upon something for me. my parents are absolutely enmeshed. it's them vs. the world. they don't have friends separate from each other. they were like this the entire time i was growing up. it's so true the relationships you see can be the ones that become the "standard" for you! but i am trying to shape my own path now. if you are with someone right now, how do you maintain your independence?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 07:12 AM
33

oooo your words are resonating with me <3 i remember even as a young teenager, i valued my independence so highly. and i really do not like men in my house for very long, either. xD
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 07:09 AM
41

A woman in a heterosexual relationship is a woman with an "owner". WOW. this might just get at the core of the issue, at least for me!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 07:07 AM
30

Perhaps this begs a larger discussion on the culture of monogamy in the western world.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 04:33 AM
135

:( this is absolutely heartbreaking. my first instinct was to get PIIIIIIIISSED. because if someone said this to my best friend, that's how i would react. until i remembered my ex said something jarring like this to me once. he had spent months whittling away at my tough girl armor, so i felt emotionally safe with him. i bawled. i feel so bad for her. once she gets those cries out though, i hope she respects herself enough to leave.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 04:05 AM
20

:( -hugs-
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 04:02 AM
13

I disagree. People say this about the n-word, but as a white person I still know it's wrong for me to say. I think women can have a term for themselves that they define for their group.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/03/21 07:07 PM
43

fuckboy vibes.... he was jealous of you
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/03/21 03:18 AM
3

i wonder if any studies exist after same-sex marriage legalization (2016).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 08:50 PM
23

I'm sorry but this is the same rationale people give for legalizing prostitution. Laws have a major effect on the choices people make.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 08:07 PM
19

this is so true...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 06:52 PM
16

what are they holding? sex toys?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 06:44 PM
2

^ This is the correct comment
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 06:39 PM
17

I truly wonder if there is therapy for men that holds them accountable. Most therapy I know about is there to just make you feel better, even if you're in the wrong.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 02:54 AM
3

Both males are LV Especially because Melman is voiced by David Schwimmer 😂😭
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 07:13 PM
2

USA scored 3rd most dangerous country for women with regards to sexual violence, and USA scored 6th most dangerous country for women with regards to non sexual violence. :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 07:08 PM
4

This is beautiful <3 how did you all become friends?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 06:51 PM
13

What is this dystopia!! I had no idea things were so strict in Canada.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 06:42 AM
32

Ewwww I hate when men are smooth talkers. I cringe on the inside when I hear that slick shit. It's not cute and it's definitely not original.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 06:31 AM
44

:O fucking savage, please marry me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 01:55 AM
5

If any man says "if I was a woman, I'd dress like a sl** / look hot" then you know they have zero clue what it is like to be a woman, nor do they care to try to understand even a little bit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 07:11 PM
3

:0 I didnt notice... why do you think hes gay?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 04:10 PM
128

This is actually very close to core radfem ideology: oppression based on sex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 03:23 PM
1

Terrible.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 08:34 PM
1

:( why do you say that?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 05:40 PM
4

Sad. It's like, do you realize if you have a baby with this man, you might have a black daughter? No critical thinking, just lazy misogynoir
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 04:19 PM
8

Single men cant adopt children?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 04:35 PM
10

eww he sucks! i'm glad you're outta there! i know the exact type of man you're referring to and hate the pretentious "iT's ArT" //TRIGGER WARNING violence, sexual assault ........ i was thinking about this when i looked up Martyrs on Wikipedia the other day (a movie mentioned in this thread). apparently it's a French film. i was like huh, this isn't the first French film i've heard of with gratuitous violence and r*pe of women. so i kept researching and apparently, Martyrs, Irreversible (movie w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 02:18 AM
3

OP could we also add female masturbation to the list?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/21 09:40 PM
35

i always just go and read the entire plot of a film before seeing it, to make sure there's no sexual violence. sucks it's so common in horror
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/21 08:11 AM
12

i'll have to check out more of his vids! this was the first i've seen, and i really liked his thoughts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/21 07:51 AM
12

for real, i always say this to young adults dealing with what i went through when i was a bit younger: sometimes you just have to fuck up over and over, then one day you're just tired of fucking up, so you get it together. lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/21 07:50 AM
7

what was?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/21 07:22 AM
53

but eventually he would have become resentful for her doing exactly what he wants and not being her own person. men create drama in relationships.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 08:00 PM
20

omg such a great way of looking at it. <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 07:57 PM
45

this, or they want to give a long monologue while she goes "oooo" and "ahhhh" and only agrees. disagreeing is apparently not his idea of intellectual.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 07:55 PM
44

what was the columnist's response? :0
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 07:19 PM
2

ah, that makes sense. i thought you meant advice that is more "tough love." yay veganism!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 07:52 PM
2

i don't doubt it. it's been about 4 years since i read it. what i'm referring to is the Judeo-Christian purpose to life, the attitude towards work, and humility.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 05:35 PM
6

this! we need to work against social conditioning that tells us women MUST be nice always.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 07:24 AM
22

your hobbies sound awesome! you sound lovely to spend time with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 07:22 AM
7

i totally understand your view, but want to offer an alternate one. i'm a vegan... this is something people say to vegans all the time. be nicer to meat eaters, or they won't go vegan. there's actually no evidence this works. in fact, in my experience, learning the facts and feeling guilt made me change. so i think there's a place for kindness and understanding, and there's a place for ruthlessness. i think the apologists and the militants need each other in a movement. kindness doesn't work for…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 07:05 AM
8

this man looks like a Sim.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 06:53 AM
41

anyone else get pissed off at the "or something?" lazy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 06:44 AM
36

sounds like you've served time and then some.... hope you've shed the dead weight!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 06:43 AM
18

it's sad because i really enjoyed his classroom lectures on personality, and i still think about them years later. i also really liked 12 Rules to Life, as it exposed me to some spiritual ideas i had never considered. buuuut then he goes and does shitty stuff.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 06:40 AM
75

hilarious when men think their hobby of gaming all day and night is more valid than my hobby of reading. reading has a multitude of benefits to the brain, including increased attention span and empathy. video games diminish BOTH of those, and waste time. you get better at playing video games, by playing video games. you get better at: speaking, critical thinking, empathy, doing tasks for long periods of time, and more, by reading.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 06:35 AM
27

Ladies who dont feel like they're very "book smart..." watch out for these men. They are smug af and will gaslight you with pretty words.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 12:41 AM
2

Interesting! I'll never forget this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 04:28 PM
10

i wonder if dogs can smell cortisol. abusive dudes = more cortisol? idk, i'm not a biology person, but it's a thought, lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 05:44 AM
2

If theres one thing that pisses me off the most about LVM, it's that they expect us to not only perform all this labor, but to entertain them as well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 05:54 PM
311

man, i hate when female friends police you like that. i try to find women who tell me the truth but who also are feminist. i definitely want friends to call me out when i'm wrong, but i also don't want to be policed to be nice to men who don't deserve it. nice job! you're not mean.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 07:56 AM
12

thiiiiiiiiis hahaha. i hold men's gazes and speak to them as an equal, and it's triggering to so many dudes. get rekt.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 02:46 AM
42

thanks for posting this. so important. a couple points so that we can practice calling out sexism when we see it: - "she's not angry, and she's not coming from a place of anger and bitterness" tf? why is she not allowed to be angry? got strangled, beaten, and threatened, but gotta remember, she's not angry. probably some racialized sexism to this as well. - "she's a little bitty thing" no. this is a woman. not a thing. kthx.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 06:18 AM
20

Please stick around. Theres lots I want you to be apart of: first female president the fall of PornHub closing the pay gap more female-dominated workplaces a huge wave of single women who will all hang out and be besties in our 50s and older. I'm confident all of this will happen in our lifetime! Stay here and experience it with me. <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 01:01 AM
2

Thank you very much!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 12:29 AM
1

Wondering if someone could type out the caption, please? Normally videos do, but this one doesn't...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 03:04 AM
6

:0 you just nailed down one of the reasons I like masks. I don't have to worry about my neutral expression looking "bitchy." They cant see my face!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/21 06:38 PM
28

i was reading last night about political lesbianism: https://politicallesbiansinsisterhood.wordpress.com/dont-love-your-enemy-love-your-sisters/ TL;DR you can choose to align yourself with other women and not fuck men. you can choose to love other women without compulsory lesbianism (you shouldn't be expected to have sex with a woman you're in a loving relationship with). and what that woman-to-woman love looks like can be defined by you. relationships with men are shaped by patriarchy, includin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/21 04:43 PM
1

i just continue talking about work or something serious, and ignore their joke.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/21 08:38 PM
23

“Marriage itself remained, as before, the legally recognized form, the official cloak of prostitution.” DAMN.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/21 06:57 PM
2

I try to remember society groomed me into thinking this was okay, that being "nice" and receiving male attention are the pinnacle of female existence. I STILL have to watch myself with male attention, and I've been into feminism for nearly 10 years. That is cultural conditioning.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/21 03:53 AM
2

every week or so I browse on /r/BrMo for reminders of what marriage is really like, lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 07:32 PM
7

man, i'm so sorry to hear that. i hope that you find peace and healing in whatever way you need! you're not alone. <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 06:25 PM
8

yes they do!! but we see now, and i have a feeling younger women are starting to see, too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 06:24 PM
11

I know this feeling and it's still hard to shake. When you're in that vulnerable position with a man, it is difficult to say no because you feel unsafe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 05:47 PM
19

We're SO conditioned to give these losers a chance, especially if we consider ourselves "nerdy" girls growing up who identify with the underdog boys in high school films.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 05:46 PM
23

OMG this is amazing! I just need to be celibate for 6.5 more years and I'll be a new woman! haha
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 05:45 PM
18

Flip the switch, run the disposal, and go to the organic market for some new men!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 05:38 PM
22

ok we need to have a flair titled "Gold Miss." /u/TheOGJammies pls. lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/21 07:37 PM
3

ROFL i want to read this in Old English
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/21 05:35 PM
2

Thank you for sharing. <3 I hope he does better someday and is able to confront whatever it is that is making him do this over and over again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 05:27 PM
1

This is true self love!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 05:25 PM
16

this is so sad because it often takes periods of being single to begin loving yourself. i also didn't have a higher self esteem until i would meet people and they loved being around me. i thought, huh, they like being around me. i must be alright. meanwhile, the LVM is conditioning you to believe you're shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 06:08 AM
3

cool idea!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 06:07 AM
16

never thought about this before, smart!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 06:05 AM
9

i have a big problem with this - i'm very polite and also compassionate, but i don't tolerate ill treatment. HOWEVER, when men are unloading baggage, sometimes the need to be "polite" or even me being at a loss for words leads me to sit there silently, not necessarily listening, but trying to think of the right "polite" thing to say to exit the conversation. i kind of wish there was something subtle i could do to make them stop talking. LOL. a disgusted face?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 06:04 AM
4

aww, this is a very sweet comment. thank you. <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 05:49 AM
6

interesting... i wonder why?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 05:48 AM
77

had sex with my "friend" with benefits for the xth time, except this time he was done in five minutes and didn't pleasure me at all. this was after saying he didn't want to date me and i shoved my feelings down and pretended i was fine with this arrangement. well, after that last time we had sex, i immediately got up and left, and never spoke to him again. that night, i googled "friends with benefits" and found FDS. #NoBadSex2021 #NoSubparRelationships2021
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 04:26 PM
36

people whose Legacy is nothing but three stale Cool Ranch Doritos in a bag in the corner of their mother's basement. ROFL noooooooo
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 02:43 AM
25

I was thinking about this watching "The Stranger" on Netflix. My favorite character, Johanne, is in at least her 50s, and I couldn't stop staring at her and noticing how beautiful she is. In a lot of ways, I think women are even more beautiful past 50. Funny, stylish, intelligent, DGAF about anybody!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 02:41 AM
6

I would hope the horse kicks him, lmao.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 02:33 AM
3

Interested in these specifics! PM me?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 02:27 AM
1

I just love how you have a word for that type of guy. Wonder what the American equivalent is. Josh? LOL. Never date Joshes...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 02:26 AM
5

yay! thank you for the tips. i love certain personality traits: open-mindedness, intelligence, kindness to others, loves the environment.... but these traits are soooo often associated with experimental drugs. -.-
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 07:43 PM
26

:o i'm more naive than i realized...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 06:24 AM
5

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2020/nov/01/the-sole-function-of-the-clitoris-is-female-orgasm-is-that-why-its-ignored-by-medical-science?fbclid=IwAR0ytF1J337U0NAGqdzwMULpnilhKaC-WTEssKsK1MopVG8gFoOqEpk9n48 The curriculum to be a fellow of the Royal Australian and New Zealand College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists covers sexual function and related disorders, but not specifically the function of the clitoris. The college said it encourages “self-directed learning” and “acknowledges…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 06:18 AM
6

source https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2020/nov/01/the-sole-function-of-the-clitoris-is-female-orgasm-is-that-why-its-ignored-by-medical-science?fbclid=IwAR0ytF1J337U0NAGqdzwMULpnilhKaC-WTEssKsK1MopVG8gFoOqEpk9n48
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 06:13 AM
2

source https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2020/nov/01/the-sole-function-of-the-clitoris-is-female-orgasm-is-that-why-its-ignored-by-medical-science?fbclid=IwAR0ytF1J337U0NAGqdzwMULpnilhKaC-WTEssKsK1MopVG8gFoOqEpk9n48
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 06:12 AM
9

oooo nice take.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 05:46 AM
21

oh... post-FDS i love me some biceps and wallets. heh heh...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 05:40 AM
11

I hope I don't offend you with this question. But do you have any patterns you noticed about drug users? I seem to keep attracting experimental drug users, and I just hate it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 05:36 AM
45

Yessss. Get comfortable being on your own... then it isn't as hard (though it's definitely still hard). One "downside" is being so content being alone, you stay this way! ;)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 05:11 AM
3

all the guys i've met who love Princess Leia just have a boner for her. -.-
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/21 03:06 AM
3

It's been years since I read it, but I do have a thing for books where the language is unique and consonant (Clockwork Orange, Catcher, Flowers for Algernon), but it's definitely important to notate the plot -- each are riddled with LVMs, misogyny, and male entitlement, even r*pe (Clockwork).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/21 05:07 PM
9

omg, can we make a list of the Scrote Book Faves? organized by type of scrote: The Boring Steve Scrote: 1984, Ender's Game, The Catcher and the Rye, Catch-22. The Intellectual Ivan Scrote: Infinite Jest, Naked Lunch, A Clockwork Orange, a collection of Bukowski poems. The Woke Tristen Scrote: The Second Sex (but he hasn't actually read it; he just knows a quote or two), Manufacturing Consent, I honestly don't know what else because I avoid these fake feminist men super hard LOL
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/21 06:22 AM
48

-laughs bitterly while crying and cringing, to convey my complex emotions towards your comment-
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/21 12:49 AM
7

Great strategy. Saving this one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/21 07:45 AM
13

"Marta Meana of the University of Nevada at Las Vegas spelled it out simply in an interview with me at the annual Society for Sex Therapy and Research conference in 2017. “Long-term relationships are tough on desire, and particularly on female desire,” she said. I was startled by her assertion, which contradicted just about everything I’d internalized over the years about who and how women are sexually. Somehow I, along with nearly everyone else I knew, was stuck on the idea that women are in it…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/21 07:29 AM
15

After dating fit men who can go all night, no more dating chubby guys for me! :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/21 07:21 AM
26

I could have written this! I agree 100%.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/21 07:39 AM
3

i just CACKLED because i thought that was food in his mouth, but upon closer look, it's a gummy smile! ROFL.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/21 02:19 AM
31

I'm so sorry you were treated terribly by many so-called important male figures in your life. I wish it wasn't so common.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/21 09:26 PM
29

I've been reading Rage Becomes Her and seeing just how much anger we hold in due to small (and often, big), repeated instances of disrespect. Sometimes when we finally say something, we overreact. Another reason to practice being assertive, so the anger doesn't boil over!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/21 09:14 PM
3

Foraging sounds super cool! Like mushrooms and stuff? :) Yeah -- I can't say I've dealt with being alone this Thanksgiving and Christmas all that well. I just called family and friends and ate takeout and watched movies... lol. But I'm trying to become more at peace with being alone, too. Maybe what I'll do on my birthday is treat myself to something I normally don't.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/21 07:52 PM
3

Absolutely! Maybe I should have said in my post -- if a woman explains that she would prefer to keep in contact in person due to her busy schedule, then I would totally understand. I think my problem is when a woman doesn't prioritize any kind of contact with you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/21 07:50 PM
3

Right there with ya, sis. What I'm doing instead is focusing on leveling up my career, expressing myself artistically, and basically just doing what I enjoy and what makes me feel healthy and grounded. Becoming independent is painful in some ways, but all it can do is help us. I'm also going to experiment with journaling all the things I'd talk about with a friend. It's tough because I'm extroverted and I "think out loud" to figure things out, but this will be a nice practice, too. What are you …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/21 06:18 PM
1

Yep, I totally have been here. <3 I'm sorry. Any other friends, family, or interests you can focus on instead?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/21 06:14 PM
1

Exactly!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/21 06:08 PM
3

:( This one is actually a bit worrisome to me. I really hope she can get treated -- there's stuff available online even now, in the pandemic. But, of course, someone has to want to accept treatment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/21 06:07 PM
3

:( Man, that's hard. Have you got devices and a good internet connection? I've actually been looking online to join online meetings about similar interests.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/21 06:06 PM
2

I'm definitely Type A too, so this spoke to me, haha. I'm working on being less hard on people. But what does it mean when we don't allow it from men, but we allow it from women? Perhaps we just need to be easier on women. But I've been stepped on by women by being a girl-power girl.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/21 06:04 PM
9

Right, in my post I was referring to a clearly established friendship. If I know the friend isn't much of a texter, like they've told me that, then that's fine. But repeatedly not responding and giving no explanation or courteous apology is what I'm talking about here. It's a double whammy if the friend doesn't respond to you, but you know for a fact they've got three different dudes they text on the daily, and they're posting pics with other people. In this case, you're not a priority.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/21 07:01 AM
6

She should at least respond with an apology, especially considering how long they've been friends. It sounds like you and your friend both mutually didn't text each other for 6 months, whereas Zayelle was texting her friend multiple times, but the friend ignored her with no explanation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/21 06:57 AM
2

Like an agenda to control you, or something else?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/21 02:22 AM
10

I think it’s more important to set a good example of what it means to be a woman empowered by self love than to caretake people. Ooooh yes, this spoke to me. Women should be able to be more than caretakers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/21 02:09 AM
4

:( I'm sorry. I've been there too, and I believe you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/21 02:07 AM
14

Wow! Two months. o_O and she says you're her best friend?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/20 11:19 PM
3

I totally get that. and i feel like calling a friend crazy without trying to hear their side is very invalidating.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/20 11:17 PM
10

Great tips. Thank you for sharing. I think I'll get involved in some work organizations as well, because then at least you know you'll have a few things in common.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/20 11:16 PM
12

I absolutely hate stuff like that, being ignored. It's all part of our conditioning, that what women say and feel are not important. Sorry you're going through that. I hope you guys can talk about it and grow together, or you find someone who values you! Same for everyone on this thread, and myself. It's REALLY hard to speak up, too. You're treated as overly emotional. Don't buy this narrative.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/20 10:08 PM
18

Queen. You phrased exactly what I'm talking about here! Where'd you find better friends?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/20 10:05 PM
27

Nice work! This is a great mindset to strive for. It's hard when you're a girl-power girl -- when women are abused, mistreated, assaulted, I'm in their corner. But when things are going well for them, I'm no longer a priority. Time to do some early spring cleaning!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/20 09:21 PM
5

Just Googled this! Do you recommend the book in general?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/20 09:14 PM
56

:( ugh. I feel you, so hard! I've been a hardheaded type for my whole life. Even before feminism, a classmate of mine in high school told me she was r*ped, and another girl said she "probably did something to provoke him." At 13 years old I was appalled and knew this was wrong. I know every woman is not like me. And I definitely used to be more scarce for my friends when I was in a relationship (pre-FDS). I guess all we can do is lay down boundaries, and keep searching for good friends? Idk. -hu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/20 09:01 PM
29

"Pornography then, allows consumers to avoid confronting the women they use as well as what their own attitudes are towards women. Importantly, this effect is not solely a product of the media forms pornography takes (and thus the physical distance that is introduced), but also the altered mode of consumption that the industry makes possible. Consumers for instance avoid a number of interactions including ‘negotiating’ a price for desired acts, using one’s own force to push beyond what was agree…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/20 06:20 AM
39

big dick energy is silent and humble!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/20 05:47 PM
3

omg. i would actually be ok with this arrangement. xD
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/20 07:10 AM
9

thank you for your confessional. 6 hail Marys.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/20 05:39 AM
6

OMG. i got one on Thanksgiving. i didn't realize this is a phenomenon...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/20 05:04 AM
44

he also called it shameful for a man to die with his wealth. there are a bunch of buildings in America named after him because he donated his money to libraries, governments, universities, etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/20 04:59 AM
88

this, LOL. i was like, this man did not read no studies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/20 04:50 AM
134

just some creative writing by some pornsicko.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/20 04:47 AM
79

Pickmes aren't a challenge to them. HVW want to grow and have their men grow with them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/12/20 11:23 PM
22

Wow. I'm stunned. Most of the time I'm pretty hardened to what women have to endure, but the meanness of this struck a nerve. Sometimes I really can't believe what women are up against, being bullied like this (because that's what this is), and then told to forgive, to calm down, to apologize, to shove your feelings down. I wish it was safe for us to have meetups, because I would love for more of you ladies to be my friends IRL. I am pretty sure my friends IRL would have my back, but the fact th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/12/20 06:52 AM
43

I hear you. Today was my first Christmas alone, ever. I was sad, but then I began to remember what I was missing. The women preparing and cooking food all day long while the men all watch TV and drink too much. Then, the men eat and go right back to the living room, leaving the kitchen a mess for the women to clean up. My stepdad and older brother ignoring what I say even when I sit right next to them and speak directly to them. The men taking up ALL the room on the couches and chairs. Me needin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/12/20 03:31 AM
49

the most low effort greeting ever.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/20 05:53 PM
7

don't forget porn!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/20 07:42 AM
4

ummm... 30 days? o_o that's nothing. i do not understand men. truly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/20 05:31 AM
5

😂 why are they SO delusional? it's hilariously sad. about two months before we broke up, after having dated for MONTHS with no arguments, i yelled at him angrily. i am usually extremely composed. was this a cue something was wrong? hmmm... a month later, we have two separate, intense conversations where i say he needs to break up with me if he isn't happy (since he was saying and doing things that were blatantly disrespectful of me as a PERSON). the day i decide to tell him i'm leaving, him: "i …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/20 01:32 AM
8

these are also school uniforms. HMMMMM....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/20 09:07 PM
90

I realised that it wasn’t him that made me happy when we were together, it was me projecting the parts of myself that I liked; my empathy, my intelligence, my spontaneity, and believing that he held these qualities. I was only happy when I was with him because he reaffirmed what I already believe about myself, that I’m funny, I’m attractive and I’m intelligent. WOW. this is so insightful!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/20 08:09 PM
9

then the child becoming aware it's a product of rape.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/20 07:07 PM
4

this. i literally just said to my mom the other day, about my ex: "I wasn't Alpha_Aries, Brad's* girlfriend. I was Brad's left arm." He constantly pressured me to watch anime when I told him again and again that I hated it. I feel strongly about it, at this point, because every man I met who watches anime is LVM and sexist. ​ *not real name
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/20 07:59 PM
3

That would be a cake I would buy for me and share with my girlfriends. lmao.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/20 07:49 PM
37

LOL.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/20 05:41 PM
19

Yikes. Care to share? I know I definitely would not be able to raise a son after FDS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/20 05:41 PM
2

this is so terrifying i couldn't finish it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/20 05:32 PM
54

takes care of the man's kids
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/20 03:22 AM
4

:O seriously??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/20 08:50 PM
7

He could have planned a picnic if he was worried about COVID.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/20 06:37 PM
25

Most men are terrible conversationalists.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/20 06:32 PM
5

Linguistics is an awesome hobby! He can take a hike.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/20 06:28 PM
3

If they worship Maynard James Keenan.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/20 06:23 PM
35

"scrotanese" ROFL
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/20 05:49 PM
3

how dare he take this song i love and use it this way!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/20 06:34 AM
32

:( do you have any friends who could move in if your mother moves out?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/20 04:11 AM
8

then shit your pants -- this will keep him away. xD
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 02:45 PM
4

i think we should take statements like this from those types of men as compliments, because they see "fucking" as power and control, too, rather than love and romance and attraction. i'm unfuckable? yes, you can't control, dominate, and manipulate me. compliment taken! :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/20 10:18 PM
10

i lost it at the dead, shriveled, cat corpse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/20 09:29 PM
15

this. the gamer guys are often out of shape, so are lazy in bed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/20 09:11 PM
24

not the OP, but i was a bit of a geek myself, a bit of a pickme, and saw gamers as more sensitive. they were definitely sweet... until i voiced my opinions.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/20 09:10 PM
26

awwww YAY! so glad your birthday was wonderful this time around!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/20 08:18 PM
2

the men who treated me the best always loved me more than i loved them. then, when i started trying to prove myself to them, they started slacking and their eyes started wandering.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/20 04:58 AM
13

no :( struggle love is one of the worst lies that's ever been sold to us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 05:23 AM
4

oooo. good point.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 04:32 AM
8

omfg you are an absolute witch (and i mean that in the magical, diabolical queen way) <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 04:28 AM
5

hahaha. YES, i've known this since i was like 15! literally every Josh I've ever met has been a fuckboy or complete chode.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 04:26 AM
56

i read the book and while i loved it, i don't know if i will ever be that woman. i hate feeling like i can't relax around the people i love, and like you said, i'm a warm and very caring woman who, if you earn my trust, will do a lot for you. i don't really want to keep a man on his toes to keep him interested, so i'm halfway between FDS and WGTOW. anyone know of any threads that talk about this?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 04:24 AM
6

nice job blocking him upon your discovery!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 04:17 AM
5

lol. he sounds like SUCH a creep, even in the way he talks. completely lacking in responsibility, and i don't excuse cheating, but i imagine his immaturity was a factor in his ex-wife's decision.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 04:15 AM
21

wow! how awful. this sounds like my worst nightmare. :( can she leave?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 04:06 AM
6

huh, so simple, it's almost obvious! xD
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/11/20 10:46 PM
13

how do you get this to happen? curious about the energy and/or strategies you use.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/11/20 04:15 PM
26

ewwww yeah he looks 70 years old! my grandfather!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 06:03 PM
36

This. I remember there was a woman who set the record for most correct answers on Jeopardy, and my brother immediately yelled out, "her ears look weird" or some shit like that, and it's like -.- of course it's not impressive because she doesn't look absolutely perfect.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 06:01 PM
7

Sometimes I think, wow... imagine what it's like to be a man. To want to control their partner, instead of being on equal ground. How tiring would that be? And to have an ego so large that any perceived slight results in a total meltdown? Despite everything, I love being a woman.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 04:34 PM
53

this, lol. people always take me refusing extra sweet treats or fatty foods as me hating myself, and it's like, no, i love my body, i'm gonna give it what it needs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 05:27 AM
5

that is so sad. i don't know why anyone would joke like that. :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 05:48 AM
5

yeah, and overweight, wearing clothes that don't fit, while her body, makeup, and hair are <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/20 05:39 PM
10

it says permanently closed on Google. :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/20 04:57 PM
20

i watched another of her videos and a lot of it was just pandering to the male porn-addicted gaze. :( please get some self-respect, girlfriend.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 05:40 PM
73

so i look several years younger than i am, and whenever an older man tries this, it fills me with glee to give him a look of disgust when he tries to hit on me. xD NOT a compliment!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 05:30 PM
24

The first one was funny, but after that, it's just like, criiiiiiinge
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 05:25 PM
20

nice work!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 05:02 AM
100

imagine telling your mother those awful things because she wouldn't buy you a purse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 04:49 AM
71

i'll start. i'm diligent. if i fall off the wagon, i always get back up! gym, healthy eating, good sleep habits, whatever it is -- i'm always striving for better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 04:46 AM
2

they're never funny...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 03:00 AM
7

:( i'm so sick of the out-of-the-blue choking, too. it's happened to me multiple times, and i just am taking a long break from dating and sex for now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 05:26 AM
14

real talk, i haven't had sex in many months because i'm just like.... ugh.... do i want to experience any of this ever again?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 05:19 AM
7

yodeling like a seal LOL
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 05:17 AM
21

men know all /s i am reminded of Why Does He Do That? where Bancroft defined this concept as "defining reality" or something, where the guy speaks his opinion with such confidence that he believes it's a fact, and he is saying it in such a way to force YOU to accept it as a fact, too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 04:10 AM
8

>Life has a way of throwing the same scenarios at us until we master them. Soooo wise. Beautiful. This stopped me in my tracks.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 04:02 AM
4

small handfuls on each of my social media accounts, and a large swath on my cell phone!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 03:56 AM
11

queen.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 03:55 AM
16

thanks for this! your dad sounds great. i hope i meet a man like him someday. the closest i can think of is my grandfather.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 03:55 AM
20

this. i've recently been enjoying looking super beautiful and taking good care of myself (for my own appreciation) and watching out of the corner of my eye guys try to get my attention, and ignoring them. :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 03:49 AM
67

old man: "is that for me?" *gestures at coffee* me: "no." old man: "iT's A jOkE"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 03:42 AM
1

thank you!! i'll check her out!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 05:16 AM
8

me too, sis. I find reading the Bible comforting, but then when it comes to the misogyny i just shrink away in repulsion. maybe i should just be on my own in my studies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 02:53 AM
5

hmm i suppose not. i've felt slightly calloused hands, but nothing sandpapery, lol!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 06:13 PM
6

just look at how he's leaning against her instead of putting his arm around her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 05:26 PM
35

ewwww when men have small, soft hands, it is SUCH a turn-off.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 05:09 PM
2

oh ok. next time i cook: -burns everything-
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 04:58 PM
1

QUEEN. thank yourself for loving yourself!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/20 02:13 AM
8

spot on!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 04:56 PM
19

i love horror/thriller movies, and there's a lotttt of that in there. i turn it off if r*pe happens. thanks for this!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/20 07:46 AM
4

i wish i could give you gold for this. nailed it. saved.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/20 07:11 PM
11

i get so embarrassed seeing these proposals to men >_<
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/20 07:00 PM
13

good point!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 06:41 PM
2

I seriously wish I would have used a strategy one of you ladies recommended on this sub for my last live-in ex. He kept putting off fixing something. I should have had a muscular, sexy male friend (orbiter) come over and fix it for us while the ex was sitting on the couch. xD
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 06:17 PM
8

funny!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/20 08:08 AM
22

omfg i wish i were this witty with strangers. xD
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/20 08:00 AM
3

how interesting! do you know of some good sites to read on astrology? sometimes i Google something but am unsure of what sources to trust.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/20 07:00 AM
22

after being spoiled by previous bfs and myself, being cheap is now an immediate next from me. nice work. :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/20 09:36 AM
2

Christmas!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/10/20 06:17 PM
27

i love this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/20 09:47 AM
5

i have seen this vibrational rhetoric around this sub a lot recently. where is that from? a spiritual practice? thanks!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/20 09:40 AM
2

this is going to sound very naive of me, so, sorry... why not give a man your real number? i just block people and haven't had problems. is there something i'm missing?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/20 09:35 AM
19

omg, your second to last sentence is something that horrifies me! also, a lot of them don't take care of their teeth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/20 09:27 AM
13

what would be the "Why Men Love Bitches" way to respond to this?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 08:19 AM
26

how'd you get there? nice work. :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 01:57 AM
5

thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 01:10 AM
4

awesome, this is very helpful. thanks!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 01:10 AM
11

<3 love this. do you have specific likeability strategies? i'm in a very similar situation as OP.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 12:51 AM
53

this makes me not want to get married. 😬
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 12:27 AM
37

this. read the handbook again, and remember everything he said was a ploy to use you for his depraved sexual fantasies. that is what misogyny looks like.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 12:25 AM
13

oh my god, this is really funny. xD thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/20 12:18 AM
1

oh! lol! gotcha.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/20 06:01 AM
2

what is Linden ideology? i googled it but that didn't help
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/20 12:26 AM
5

watch out for the chin beards. men with this facial hair are always bleghhhh
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/20 09:51 PM
1

depending on their level of confidence, it could take a lot of ignored responses! but they do eventually stop. :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/20 06:10 AM
7

do you ladies know any apps that background check users?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/10/20 05:49 PM
14

i'd pretty much only be okay with this if he owned several Targets in a region. Edit: dating someone who works at Target, NOT begging for marriage. i would never
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/10/20 05:45 AM
11

*dies*
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/10/20 04:50 AM
8

the book is so cleansing, but can also be triggering. it's so important to read it to the end. good work, sis
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/10/20 09:16 PM
14

haha! thanks for this!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/10/20 06:02 PM
2

care to share some of your analysis? i'd love to read it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/10/20 05:59 PM
11

lmaooooo okay. meanwhile i've had strangers come up to me and tell me i'm one of the most beautiful women they've ever seen. i'm sure a lot of women in here have had similar experiences.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/10/20 05:44 PM
60

this is a really smart exercise. gonna start doing this, too!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 05:40 PM
20

LMAO noooooooo! xD
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 06:20 PM
7

lol!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 12:33 AM
48

ew, I cringe for him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 12:31 AM
50

SOFTWARE DEVELOPERS omg
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/20 05:59 AM
10

i think living in a small town you see libfeminism less, and especially in the southeastern U.S. (Bible Belt) there's still a lot of traditional views.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/20 05:53 AM
24

out of curiosity, is there a therapeutic treatment for this?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/20 04:16 AM
2

agreed, sis... i want something in this range as well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 04:09 PM
14

love how you echoed OP in your comment about echoing. ^_^
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 03:58 PM
14

wait... rings only cost $6k? the way men bitch and moan about spending money on a ring, i truly thought they cost in the 5 digits. it's one ring, for the one woman you'll spend the rest of your life with. why wouldn't you spend a lot of money on it??? gah.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 05:59 AM
34

"just chill"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/20 05:27 AM
18

you are beautiful and strong for this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 07:32 PM
3

the girls killlledddddd those boys!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 06:46 AM
9

i, too, follow dogfree xD agreed with everything you said!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 06:44 AM
5

spiders are cool! i wish they weren't so creepy...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 03:46 AM
26

LOL!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 03:32 AM
13

this was absolutely terrifying and makes me want to arm myself for if a pitbull ever attacked me or someone else
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 03:21 AM
22

I'm scared of Pitbulls, too. Immediate NEXT if a guy owns one
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/20 03:19 AM
2

occasionally i get a comment from a male acquaintance where they will make some snide comment about my makeup or outfit and i'm like ???? how dare you? you think you can have a say in how i look? but yeah, i'm not inviting them to things anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/20 06:09 PM
2

i cant wait til my 30s for this reason. right now i don't want to date, but male attention still matters to me more than it should. i dont actively seek it out, but for instance, if a man talks badly about my appearance, it hurts my feelings. which is dumb. i'm 26 for Christsakes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 08:01 AM
2

me as well!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 06:36 PM
18

your husband sounds like he can handle an HVW! love it. :) and yeah, it's insane. i've found men REALLY do respond to NO CONTACT. here's something that happened to me a few years back: me: stops talking to male friend for months male friend: "hey, i bought you a gift." ???? lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 04:23 PM
26

Death looks different to a woman who has been battered; it seems not nearly so cruel as life. I'm upset by what I regard as the phony, false mourning for Lisa Steinberg—the sentimental and hypocritical mourning of a society that would not really mind her being beaten to death once she was an adult woman. If Lisa hadn't died, she would be on West Tenth Street being tortured—now. Why was it that we wanted her to live? So that when the child became a woman and she was raped or beaten or prostituted…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 08:33 AM
13

omg, this is really funny.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 12:03 AM
87

yessss, this is in "Why Men Love Bitches," too.: ATTRACTION PRINCIPLE #86The more independent you are of him, the more interested he will be. The story that follows proves my point. Rob, an attractive, successful man who could have his pick of any woman he wanted, was mystified by a most unlikely woman. He describes Laura as a “conservative computer nerd” who wears long pleated skirts. After a few dates, he invited her to go on a cruise. Rob wasn’t lacking in the confidence department, and he th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 11:55 PM
2

yeah, i kinda just want a guy for a certain chapter of life, then when it's time for it to end, it ends, we move on. guess i'll get dragged for wanting to "have my cake and eat it too," but we see men wanting this kind of stuff all the time. so i don't see the harm in wanting serial monogamy. but, i suppose if he's HVM, he'll want to propose after a year or so. and you don't want to lead him on. and you're saying how will i expect to find an HVM who isn't marriage-minded, right? i think the chan…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 08:47 PM
3

no, definitely. i believe in leaving a relationship with negative value, and i have several times before. perhaps i'm thinking this way because i just finished "Why Men Love Bitches" and some of that stuff in there (while fierce) just sounds like a lot of work, lol. maybe i'm just not in the mood to date, period, but i still like me some good sex. but it's not good without the connection. so you're caught in a bind.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 08:41 PM
56

why do men think they deserve to have a funny, confident, and positive woman to converse with when they put in this amount of effort? lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 07:25 AM
17

this. men always want you to entertain them. xD
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 07:21 AM
29

holy CRAP. you are safe, right?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 07:21 AM
27

<3 you sound like you rock!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 07:20 AM
4

good point. it is a lot of emotional investment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 07:19 AM
1

hahahah!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 04:29 AM
10

LOL.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 04:28 AM
18

I love the kiddos in the background, makes for a really interesting artistic effect. :) I really enjoyed this. Keep singing, you sound lovely!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 04:14 AM
3

thank you, and you too. it's kind of exhausting the burden is placed on women to constantly deflect men and stay alert.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 05:33 AM
6

ewwww noooo. i had a 55+ year old man ask my VISIBLY 21 or younger self if i wanted to go out sometime. noooo.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 05:22 AM
2

hahaha! i can't even be mad because this is hilarious
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 05:08 AM
3

lmao!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 05:03 AM
4

i inherited a really intense browline/eyes from my dad and grandmother, almost everyone in my family has this too. i honestly think this saves me from random dudes approaching me, most of the time. I LOVE how you laughed in his face.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 04:56 AM
25

ugh sapiosexual is soooo smug
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 04:50 AM
6

you should watch the Mark Zuckerberg/Elon Musk Epic Rap Battle of History, lol. That Mark Zuckerberg looks more Mark Zuckerberg than Mark Zuckerberg.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 04:48 AM
8

dude, the level of half assery most men do while cleaning is ridiculous once, i had a little shindig at my place. a male friend needed to crash on my couch after, so i told him to sweep in return. it looked alright, then literally the next day i went to grab my vacuum from the corner of the kitchen. this dude swept the crumbs and dust into the corner. WTF.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 04:37 AM
17

I have this problem too, don't worry. Honestly, a long, awkward silence does wonders if you can't think of anything to say.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 04:30 AM
1

you're very welcome! i found psychotherapy very effective for real-life situations. :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 07:17 PM
13

SO entitled!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 05:23 AM
16

don't wanna be a fool for you, just another player in your game for two! might sound crazy, but it ain't no lie, scrotey bye bye bye!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 05:11 AM
8

lol @ men playing hard to get....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 05:00 AM
7

this seems counterintuitive, but it really helps (and is supposed to work with anxiety, too): acceptance. accept you're not gonna be perfect and you'll slip up and just be kind to yourself. change takes a long time. if you find yourself crushing on a guy, don't berate yourself. just be like, "oh, i'm noticing i'm thinking a lot about this guy. that's totally understandable, Queen, because i have some self-work to do. it'll take time. let's focus on something else." i also learned that in psychot…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 04:55 AM
3

OMFG i can't believe the men use the women's restroom???
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 10:36 PM
4

(and his version of "doing the laundry" involves not separating anything, then leaving the clean clothes crumpled in the basket without folding them. wiping the countertop, for him, means swiping crumbs onto the floor.) xD
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 09:54 PM
4

this. an HVM would want you AWAY from predatory men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 09:11 PM
3

she loves the man who sings, "you lil dumb ass b**** i ain't fuckin with you," nice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 09:06 PM
3

this. idk about y'all but i'm so private about relationship stuff. on social media i only post photos of a man and i posing next to each other and smiling. i saw this pic of a woman and her LV boyfriend (he apparently has cheated on her) kissing while he gropes her butt. like, c'mon, have some self respect...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 08:59 PM
6

yup. trapping her and not allowing her to move or get away is physical abuse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 03:47 PM
3

same, girl. i can't let men get too close unless we're dating. inevitably i am very kind to them and treat them like a female friend, but they aren't as good of friends to me. i'm keeping male friendships at bay and/or fading them, at this point, to focus on myself and other HVW.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 02:40 PM
1

i think she was agreeing
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 11:57 PM
3

aww, i'm sorry. i hope you find what works for you. <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 08:48 PM
34

YES and i hate when they say it with such confidence, too. like wtf. -.-
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 06:37 PM
6

fair enough. i think my older brother would call me and chew me out, not save my photos.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 07:53 AM
12

hmm. i guess i didn't think of it that way. if my brothers did this to me, yeah, that'd be so gross and weird.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 07:50 AM
14

love this. ^_^
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 06:57 AM
3

oh wow! i guess i don't see why one shouldn't, if they don't want kids? (i don't)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 06:51 AM
9

honestly, antidepressants, if that's what your doc recommends. they: lowered my sex drive, which i see as a positive. makes me less likely to settle calmed me the fuuuuuuuuck down shortened how long it takes me to recover from bad days give me less bad days in general. i'm still sensitive and kind, but i no longer cry at everything like i used to. hope this helps.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 04:07 AM
5

If they ask, I'm thinking of using "wouldn't YOU like to know?" in a coy tone. then switching the convo back to them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 03:53 AM
9

that man does NOT know how to add, clearly. xD but seriously, yep - only reason so much shit was created by men is because they were the ones with the resources for so long. i'm almost done with the Scene on Radio "MEN" podcast series where they discuss this in detail!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 03:46 AM
47

i feel ya and have been in a couple of those poly/kinky meetings before! ugh soooo creepy and patriarchal. x_x glad you're here!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 03:44 AM
22

huh, he's weird. lol. got a free book out of it, though! maybe it's time to block. he knows.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 03:41 AM
78

LOL. i thought it was cool at first, then it was dumb, then of course he made it sexual.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 03:26 AM
20

huh, interesting! makes me want to get a hysterectomy at 26. xD
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 03:24 AM
6

wow! why do you think that is?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 09:14 PM
18

well done! find some support, and don't tell anyone who may not be supportive. court can be rough.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 08:59 PM
22

yep, my mom tells me sometimes i "have walls up" but really what that means is i don't take bullshit from guys.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 08:58 PM
3

ooo. good point. :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 08:53 PM
3

it's weird, i'll sit there and stew until my anger flows into my legs and allows me to get up and leave, lol. probably not the healthiest thing in the world.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 05:13 PM
9

of course, all these articles always end with Not All Men ™ i understand as women it's uncomfortable to state our opinions and not water them down. but that's what strength looks like in journalism.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 05:12 PM
8

i see a post similar to this on FDS like once a week - seriously, guilt is SO baked into us as women. i see it as rebellion against our conditioning to forgive ourselves and not live in constant guilt. <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 05:04 PM
0

while this seems sweet, i wouldn't want to chauffeur a man around everywhere. :/
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 04:20 PM
1

Season three was probably the best out of all of them -- and it started out great! But yeah, it's really sad, especially if you have a kiddo. There were a couple moments where I felt so bad for Danny's mom, Beth. Then, of course, for the teenage boy in season three.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 04:11 PM
6

nope, soft men are big turn-offs for me too, lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 04:09 PM
2

another reason to date lean, fit men, haha.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 10:07 AM
1

yes, and very smug!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 10:04 AM
30

yup. my body looks good and is healthy, why would i settle for a man who is soft and pudgy? a man who eats garbage and makes Coke can towers?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 09:35 AM
3

he is so insecure of your accomplishment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 09:07 AM
7

it's a little corny -- is he inexperienced? a nerd? these are the kinds of thoughts i'd have.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 09:05 AM
9

the Kissing Booth 1&2 prove this, lol Chloe is a bit of a sucker.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 08:01 AM
24

your value is not contingent on whether men give you attention, promise <3 this is still something i'm trying to internalize. i'm in a male-dominated hobby, and i brought the boys round the house for a game night. almost all of them have tried to get in my pants and three different roommates' pants. they will go for A N Y O N E who gives them the slightest attention. WE have the power. not them!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 07:56 AM
25

men are jealous.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 07:53 AM
9

O_O what??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 11:57 PM
2

i don't think she's ready for it, unfortunately. but when the time is right, i will!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 09:40 PM
3

;-; my bowels quiver at the thought
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 06:34 PM
69

i feel this in my bones. thank you for this righteous anger!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 06:26 PM
19

good mindset shift strategy!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 06:24 PM
2

i see what you're saying, and that sounds super healthy! i suppose i saw your comment and thought of the "bacon keto" as you mentioned, which is soooo unhealthy. glad you found what works for you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 06:20 PM
2

your English is great, thanks for your comment. diet is definitely a tricky, complex, and personal subject. there are many choices, and finding what works for you can take forever. i'm honestly still finding out what foods trigger my IBS! but i've seen great results from going plant-based. it's good to know there are lots of choices out there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 06:19 PM
3

oh definitely, as i said, i was born bi. but i don't think it's 100% one way or the other for everyone, y'know?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 06:15 PM
1

i like the powerlifter physique, or a bodybuilder on his off-season.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 06:14 PM
2

fair enough, i suppose i just see low carb touted a lot on Reddit and from people IRL. i suppose it's because it's the new trendy diet. meanwhile, i've got hella energy, lost a little weight without even trying (from increased fiber intake), and recover from a workout faster. i'm all for people finding what works for them!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 06:12 PM
1

omg the part where she said it's "good for anime" is so true i said this to my LVM ex about Cowboy Bebop and he was TRIGGERED. he teared up. no more dating serious anime-watching dudes! :D
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 06:48 AM
4

hey, agreed with most of what you said, except the part about carbs! i eat a plant-based diet, so like 75% of my macros are carbs. just go for the slow-burning, whole foods carbs, like beans, sweet potatoes, oats, whole grains. i'm not sure why carbs are so demonized, and i'm not targeting you specifically, just want to help bust some myths. also, with this diet i'm at 19% body fat! carbs = great.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 05:58 AM
3

what's yo routine tho
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 05:56 AM
9

if this ain't the truest shit ever
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 05:34 AM
6

ughhhhhhhh a few of my exes type like this both were just trying to get close to my warm, kind personality -- usually for ego strokes. blockedt!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 05:33 AM
3

this beat goes hard!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 05:29 AM
11

Bellies repulse me on men. I don’t like a soft body on a man. Completely agree! It's a major turn-off for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 05:20 AM
7

seriously! eat whole foods, get outside and go for a walk every day. don't eat Hot Pockets and Oreos for dinner.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 05:18 AM
9

WHAT do men EAT to look like this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 05:17 AM
4

one of my friends said she likes this, and i think it's just low self-esteem... i think she's a babe, but i don't know if she thinks of herself as such.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 05:17 AM
3

i feel like Joe from Impractical Jokers is a good representation of this (though I love that show)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 05:13 AM
11

siiiiiis were you in HS in the 90's? baggy jeans were the LOOK!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 05:11 AM
6

so i've hung out a lot with bodybuilders and have found the strongest guys don't look the most cut. i'm pretty sure the really cut ones are dehydrated to look like that. also have a SUPER low body fat percentage (like 5-7%), so not the healthiest. sexy (real) bodybuilder physique? yes'm! huge, soft bellies? NO.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 05:07 AM
9

7 months pregnant hahaaaaa this sub kills me! you ladies are so funny.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 05:04 AM
13

ROFL "flesh fanny pack"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 05:04 AM
4

wow! he sounds awful! so glad you're here now! i cannot STAND cheap men, it disgusts me. i don't know why i get such a feeling of contempt at this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 05:02 AM
17

ok SO i agree with you and take this with a grain of salt, lol, because i was born bi. but as i get older, i more freely allow myself to feel attraction to women. i guess what i'm trying to say to y'all is, WLW are great. lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 04:54 AM
2

i'm actually writing a thank you card to my therapist from years ago because of this comment. she changed my life for the better, permanently!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 04:38 AM
4

imagine saying this to men! HA!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 04:36 AM
4

following because i'm an open book type of woman too, LOL
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 04:29 AM
4

nehhh, stepdad is LVM. has some good qualities, but he and my mom are definitely just codependent. when she started to thrive, lose weight, make friends, he withdrew, said "you're too skinny now," and that made her scared to lose him. she put the weight back on, ghosted a lot of friends, never figured out what her own interests are. i won't be wasting my life like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 04:23 AM
2

great advice!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 04:08 AM
10

slightly off-topic, but there's an Explained episode on Netflix that talks about "leisurewear." it's pretty neat!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 03:47 AM
16

OMG i was just thinking about this, with some songs it's like i'm hearing them for the first time since FDS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 03:29 AM
42

n...no....? i'm listening to podcasts, watching Netflix, exercising, studying, volunteering, leading groups, getting closer to family and friends, making yummy food, meditating, and coloring in a coloring book. oh wait, but those are actually empowering things for women...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 03:28 AM
68

also, oftentimes overweight women are way more attractive than overweight men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 03:21 AM
30

oh, for sure... i feel like i missed out on a lot of "rules" girls of other generations learned about socializing. i've had to just pay attention to what works, and find older female role models.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 03:15 AM
1

yessss. fingers crossed this happens with my bestie. she's 24, he's 32, he's gross and a loser. she's flourishing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 02:50 AM
1

and it's crazy because these female "gold diggers" are often providing more non-monetary benefits than male gold diggers... - keeping up physical appearance: gym, makeup, hair, nails, clean eating. all hard work. - oftentimes, cooking and cleaning. not "hard" work, but very tedious, especially to come home to a kitchen you JUST CLEANED THAT MORNING now trashed with gross dishes, puddles, wrappers, and an overflowing trash can and/or recyclables in the trash. (if it sounds like i'm speaking from …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 02:17 AM
1

great quote, i may put this on a dating profile...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 12:54 AM
1

more time for what? therapy? looking for HVM?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 06:32 PM
2

oooo. your first paragraph is really helpful, thank you. i think i might just be impatient and overly worried about how i come off. perhaps calming down is the way to go. Isn't this attitude why men have crappy relationships in general? good point, lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 10:08 PM
3

i mean, i only bring up my sexuality if it's natural to do so, of course. i thought you meant keeping it a secret forever.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 10:06 PM
5

I'm sorry but that typo is really funny on a post where I talk about being bisexual, LOL thanks for the insight!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 10:04 PM
44

wow. O_o this hit me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 05:36 PM
2

love your edit. thanks girl! yeah, i definitely need to apply FDS to women in that i don't need to be desperate to hang out with them. have a full life without them, etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 05:33 PM
3

hmm. i guess i feel like i'm hiding something if i don't tell them. and the discomfort may just be internalized homophobia on my part...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 05:32 PM
6

nooo no. i'm not sarcastic (though i used to be when i had lots of guy friends). i've changed quite a bit since high school. and, yes -- i've noticed my closer female friends seem either introverted or are more reserved, so maybe you're onto something there! thanks for the tips.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 05:31 PM
4

There's a podcast episode on "Women of Impact" where she addresses this. Also, I'm doing theXeffect (which you can find on Reddit! don't wanna link it here). I put notes of encouragement in areas I'll see them everyday, along with reasons WHY i'm trying to complete those goals. basically, create an environment conducive to success.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 03:47 AM
2

unfortunately, practice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 03:25 AM
4

Been here too! I scroll on FDS when I feel weak. Glad you're here. :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 03:21 AM
13

fuck off, Steve.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 03:12 AM
18

i'm 5'10" too and will wear wedges/heels on first dates as a vetting strategy, lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 02:54 AM
3

idk about y'all, but i can't control my face when i hear comments like this. i'm immediately just like ಠ_ಠ and that seems to make them rethink joking like that! haha!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 08:03 AM
1

<3 trying to help another stranger level up! i hope people here would do the same.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 08:01 AM
11

serious anime watchers ​ black and white thinking ​ seem "liberal" and "feminist" but refer to women with denigrating, sexist terms, and hold sexist double standards.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 07:59 AM
29

:( i'm sorry hon, i recently realized the same thing. i'm pretty adventurous myself and like some good sex, but i can't do it without wanting the whole package. it's ok to feel this way! just focus on yourself now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 07:01 AM
1

ohhh. i'll try this. :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 11:58 PM
0

keto guys, lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 11:52 PM
6

i'm sorry, but you must be coming off as a pushover if guys keep doing this to you. don't let guys intimidate you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 11:52 PM
1

oh sure, but i meant consistently!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 11:11 PM
9

ooo this is something i want one day but i thought might be "asking too much." can you tell how you came to expect this from him? has he ever slipped up? what happened then?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 09:26 AM
22

Agreed with the other commenter here. By itself, "I only get along with other guys" is a red flag. Sexual assault apologia is a whole 'nother level. Would you feel safe telling her if a man made you feel uncomfortable?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 09:25 AM
15

Perhaps, since you said you'd like to get to know him, just go on one date to practice some FDS strategies and sniff him out. That's kinda what I'm doing right now. No intention on a relationship, just looking around at what's out there and getting practice with not being phased by manipulative tactics men use. It's totally up to what you want out of the situation. Remember you have the upper hand.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 09:22 AM
4

<3 yay! i'm glad it helped. also, emotional labor really is tiring, and anxiety makes you feel like if you keep on talking about it, that's solving the problem. but there has to be a point where you stop and say, okay, that's enough. i still work on my boundaries regarding this!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 11:27 AM
9

bruh this is so true. to this day, no man has felt like a mental challenge (in a fun way) conversationally except my dad and brother.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 09:18 AM
16

Practice, getting treated for my anxiety, and not glomming onto people were what helped me. like you, i used to dig really deep into people emotionally. people have always told me they feel like i won't judge them, and they feel like they can trust me. now, i just say something like, "man, i'm sorry :/" followed by some kind of generic response that isn't -mean- necessarily, but drives the point across that i'm ready to change the subject. something like, "family is hard. you know what family is…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 09:15 AM
14

i think you are projecting your kindness onto him, which i struggle with as well i would say he at the very least needs to do more to make it up to you. i wouldn't reply. he would need to send me flowers or something. but i'm pretty new, so maybe listen to the more experienced women on here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 09:04 AM
10

yeaaaahhh when i start feeling repulsion at a man, a breakup is in sight.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 07:04 AM
16

Sure! I actually had to parse some of the info and analyze the source for reputability for a homework assignment, haha. https://www.thecut.com/2017/12/6-new-things-researchers-learned-about-single-people-in-2017.html The article, titled "6 New Things Researchers Learned About Single People in 2017," is written by Bella DePaulo, Academic Affiliate, Psychological & Brain Sciences at the University of California, Santa Barbara. Her expertise is in psychology, and she has written many books on singl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 06:45 AM
5

Nice work! I'd like to share a similar victory. I was on OLD, and this guy with a fantastic body and I matched. (I'm attracted to muscled guys. Shows they care for themselves). His FIRST message was a neg: "wow, you like x, y, and z? And you're pretty? Is this a fake profile?" I should have just blocked him, but I decided to experiment with the FDS "match their effort" guideline. I simply replied with "lol." He then proceeded to put in SO little effort in his responses, and never asked me out, i…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 10:50 PM
37

Look at Bella DePaulo's work - single women actually do better after a divorce, socially and health-wise
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 09:55 PM
36

What a shame. I couldnt have a bf who loses his erection inside me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 09:19 PM
4

I'm here for it! 😎
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 10:19 PM
5

👀
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 10:12 PM
8

That was so funny, thank you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 09:42 PM
2

Unfortunately not, I dont keep in contact with her. :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 08:29 PM
48

She is! She spilled the FDS tea to me YEARS before I was ready for it, but I'll never forget her for it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 11:07 AM
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