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View 3 posts and 50 comments by Sea_Broccoli6349 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
80

Sea_Broccoli6349/r/Divorce_Men01/11/24 06:54 PM
35

RantSea_Broccoli6349/r/Divorce_Men05/09/24 11:55 PM
32

RantSea_Broccoli6349/r/Divorce_Men23/09/24 02:37 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
3

Sadly I think this is my experience. It really is disheartening. I would have done a lot, quite a lot, to save my marriage and mend the broken pieces. She pushed too hard though, filing for separation and dating other people is not part of healing, it isn't going to mend anything. I don't think she stopped to realize what she had done until it was much too late.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/25 11:57 AM
3

A person who does wrong, does wrong to themselves. A person who acts unjustly, commits injustice against themselves. Socrates.
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/25 10:57 PM
26

I haven't followed the case but I'm not sure it is a good example to use to prove a point. These are not some baseless allegations, she is a victim of abuse and was coerced or explicitly forced to do things that she did not want to do with the threat of violence and revenge. I agree that women can sometimes be two-faced, but perhaps pointing the finger at someone in an abusive relationship is a stretch too far. Just my opinion.
/r/Divorce_Men17/05/25 03:44 PM
1

If it is going to be a no fault divorce, I think very little matters. In the case of child custody, things related to domestic violence would play a role but would require actual evidence and investigation.
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/25 03:49 AM
6

More Stoics: Epictetus and Seneca For modern books, look at Ryan Holiday's books. But if you are going to read one and only one, definitely Meditations is the one.
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/25 07:08 PM
6

I found reading the Stoics helped me tremendously
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/25 06:56 PM
2

I think you are on to something for sure. There have been many posts on here about the crud that is spreading through social media. I am not some "trad" loser, but I definitely believe there is a vocal minority pushing anti-marriage viewpoints.
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/25 01:07 AM
8

Yes... You will be doing exactly that if you let yourself. Some days I spend way too much time on the apps even though I would hardly say there is much reason to be there. I don't want another wife, I'm not ready for any committed relationship, and honestly I have to wonder how many of the other "single moms" on the apps did to their ex husbands what mine did to me. My standards for what I'm willing to tolerate in a relationship and how much I'm willing to invest have certainly changed. I was pr…
/r/Divorce_Men24/01/25 01:25 AM
5

I have a slightly similar situation. STBXW left me and chased cheap sex soon after the date of separation, possibly even before. Just before Christmas she starts coming on to me again, apologizing, saying she wants to rekindle our relationship. We were "in love again" for a whole 2 weeks, had some good sex, all the while I was telling her I was still processing what had happened between us. She already reneged and said she "doesn't think she can do this".
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/25 02:26 PM
1

Yes absolutely, I think that was probably the case for most of us, but then why is she trying to check back in now?
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/25 12:49 AM
5

I'm sort of finding myself in a similar situation, unsure if I did or did not expect this. My ex left and was clear that her decision was final. She slept around immediately after. Not even a year later she is trying to put the rings back on. I'm just going to wait it out, I don't really think she means to get back together.
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/25 11:37 PM
9

Solid post 💪
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/25 09:10 PM
2

I really like this take. I just asked myself the other day "what are you afraid of?" I may be alone forever. I may never have another love like her. So what? I may die tomorrow, she may die tomorrow, my child may die tomorrow... I never lived in crippling fear over any of that (except when you are in those first few months, becoming a parent is weird). A lot of the things in your head are THOUGHTS. You are the one calling them fears.
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/24 03:16 AM
2

There is legal divorce and there is a divorced mindset. I am not legally divorced because my state requires couples to wait 1yr to file if they have kids. That legal requirement is the only thing standing between me and divorce though, so I consider myself divorced. You said yours was on/off. I'm not sure if that means you've tried again during this time or what. If you've made the determination that you are absolutely done with the marriage, I'd say you are divorced.
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/24 05:12 AM
6

This 💯
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/24 03:20 AM
8

Yea I think mine is/was. I certainly made plenty of mistakes but she also gave other reasons for the divorce that just came out of nowhere and I think it reflected an internal struggle that was mostly unrelated to me and more about what she was missing out on by being married at all and by being a mom. Not that it really changes anything. She left me and I'm not going to wait around for her to work through things, plus the whole episode just created even more problems that we'd have to "talk abo…
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/24 02:56 AM
2

I think it depends on your situation. Many of my colleagues are also good friends. There was never going to be an opportunity to hide anything, nor would I want to. They have helped me get through it. I did not have a sit-down with my boss, but I'm sure they know via regular work gossip.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/24 09:17 PM
3

Will be my first holiday season split as well. We are going to try a combined Thanksgiving (including the grandparents), and decide on Christmas after seeing how that goes. I can't imagine not being there for my kid on Christmas morning... He is prime Santa age. Rough.
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/24 02:48 AM
7

This was a great read. I'm going to save this so that I periodically stumble up on it. I am still within my first year. Thanks 👍
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/24 02:36 AM
3

Sadly I wish I would have seen this advice sooner.
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/24 04:44 PM
1

I'm here with you guys. My ex wanted try out girls and men that were "different" than me, so she left.
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/24 01:56 PM
2

I can relate. I've set some goals for myself that I probably would not have made if I were still married, that's one thing. Therapy also. I was happy with my prior life and hate that it was ripped away from me.
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/24 02:40 AM
3

Does that make it any better? Knowing that you loved someone so deeply and dedicated your life to them and they didn't feel the same in return... Hurts all the same doesn't it?
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/24 01:58 AM
6

Agreed. I only meant that it can be difficult to know when to call it quits for good. But you are right that if she is gone and you remain committed that it is no longer a relationship, it's servitude.
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/24 12:05 AM
7

Easier said than done. Standing firm in your commitment to your family is also the mark of a man.
/r/Divorce_Men01/11/24 11:46 PM
2

With you. No advice to give right now. Just know that I'm in the same boat.
/r/Divorce_Men27/10/24 03:48 PM
3

Experienced this. Did not know it had such a fitting name. Like it!
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/24 12:48 AM
2

I agree with you. I've shared my thoughts on this here before as well. It took me a while to notice, but once you see it, it's hard to forget about.
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/24 11:37 PM
2

"One of the best" was what I said. Also, the nuance is that this is a temporary effect. It is not about if she HAS divorced friends. What matters is has someone in her circle recently initiated a divorce. The effects are large. Almost 3 or 4 times more likely.
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/24 12:53 AM
18

It is called divorce contagion and it is one of the best predictors of divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men11/10/24 07:57 PM
1

I put mine in a box with other wedding/marriage stuff that seemed important to keep and put it in my attic. She kept her ring. No idea what she'll do with it, also don't care.
/r/Divorce_Men10/10/24 10:12 AM
1

I think this is the best advice in the thread. I disagree with everyone outright saying NO. My marriage was a blessing and I will miss it for the rest of my life. I would not go back and undo it. Had it lasted for forever, I would have been among the happiest men ever to have lived. It was soul crushing as it ended though, and that is putting it lightly. I do agree that if the couple do not ever plan to have kids, there is less reason to marry.
/r/Divorce_Men10/10/24 12:31 AM
5

I met with a lawyer 2 times, as did my wife. My first meeting was free, this is common. My stbxw and I then drafted up a skeleton separation agreement, she had it fully written by her lawyer. My second meeting with my lawyer we reviewed the agreement and I signed it there, took maybe 20 minutes. So my entire legal cost was half of my lawyers hourly rate. I would strongly recommend this hybrid approach. You do most of the work, but you want someone knowledgeable to review it. Also nobody cared ho…
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/24 02:16 AM
5

Median length of first marriage in US: 8 yrs 42% of first marriages end in divorce unconditionally College educated couples marrying between 23-28 have a divorce rate of only 20% at 10 years and 30% at 20 years.
/r/Divorce_Men30/09/24 08:14 PM
3

Yea. My wife insisted on couples counseling too. Didn't go the way she expected!
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/24 12:20 PM
5

I'm with you on all of it, but I say that I'm doing fine. I think you need to flip your mindset. I also ache that I was so harshly rejected by a woman who said she would love me forever. I also wish that she wouldn't have done it. But she did! You cannot ignore that. It's her mistake, not yours.
/r/Divorce_Men26/09/24 04:50 PM
9

This. I miss the way things were. That is not who she is to me now. I started missing her before she even told me she wanted a divorce. Who she is now is a different person.
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/24 11:32 PM
3

Virtue cosplay! I like it
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/24 07:42 PM
2

It's on my to read list!
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/24 07:42 PM
3

OP, why not take this to its full conclusion and just recommend living with your parents rent free?
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 04:27 PM
2

That's an even better example. Suppose someone is searching for divorce: what should the algorithm prioritize in their feed? Marriage counseling and posts about conflict resolution? Or divorce lawyers and posts about how all husbands are bad?
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/24 10:17 PM
2

Yes absolutely. Suppose I search for marriage counseling online. The apps will see that and now I get targeted things. But what content should be pushed? Pro-marriage or pro-divorce content?
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/24 09:19 PM
5

Agreed to some extent. My stbxw had a crazy expensive hobby (tens of thousands of dollars per year). I did NOT have such a hobby and mostly focused on spending time with my son, which costs very little, so saved a ton of money. Funny how we still get to split our assets 50/50. That being said, while we were in love and married I was mostly fine with the arrangement. When we split though, fair division of assets should take more into account than it actually does. Instead, there is a limited view…
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 12:09 PM
5

Yep. Similar. I know my type. I am not some deadbeat, I contribute. She straight up would say she is "tired of doing ALL of the work" and bearing the mental load. I'm happy to discuss specific shared responsibilities, but only if some degree of rationality is going to be involved.
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 10:54 AM
2

Vows are an extension of virtue. Well put!
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 03:07 AM
3

Yea I did not use to agree with you, but now I see the downside more clearly. I did learn cool things sometimes, but the cons far outweigh the pros.
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 02:55 AM
4

That sounds similar to my experience on the counseling front. She pushed and pushed for it, we went a few times, she then said it wasn't working for her. I think what really happened is that she didn't get the validation from the therapist that she was seeking. I continued to do individual therapy, which I also started at her request, and have learned a tremendous amount about myself and the relationship I thought I had. Also, "divorce contagion" is a very real thing. Your odds of divorce go up …
/r/Divorce_Men06/09/24 02:02 PM
6

Yep sounds like a similar experience. She started throwing lots of stuff at me like she was diagnosing our problems or my problems after watching 2 things on insta. I tried to get her to see how things are always a bit more complicated than you can learn from a 2 minute internet video and that maybe she should focus more on her actual experience rather than what the internet tells her she is experiencing. Didn't work. She started going on and on about how marriage wasn't necessary in 2024. She s…
/r/Divorce_Men06/09/24 09:30 AM
3

In the US, unless you have a prenup stating otherwise, anything you save up right now is also half hers. From a purely financial point of view, you would be better off separating now. Sounds like you might be young though, so long working life ahead of you, so money should not be high on your worries right now. Focus on what you want in a partner and ask if she can give you that.
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/24 02:08 PM
1

Daughters and mothers almost always share everything. Even if they don't plan it together, you know they are talking about it long before you hear about it.
/r/Divorce_Men17/08/24 12:23 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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