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AffectionateCold9 Archive

View 4 posts and 34 comments by AffectionateCold9 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
61

AffectionateCold9/r/Divorce_Men06/03/26 10:25 PM
19

False AccusationAffectionateCold9/r/MensRights07/12/25 06:51 PM
15

Need SupportAffectionateCold9/r/Divorce_Men24/03/26 05:38 PM
1

Dealing with the Ex / STBXAffectionateCold9/r/Divorce_Men26/03/26 06:16 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
2

It's because they want something or because she is trying to catch you off guard, she will be nice enough to you for a period of time just long enough for you to start relaxing and thinking ok maybe this isn't so bad and maybe we can actually work together co-parent etc and the moment it's been just long enough for you to let your guard down she will say or do something really shitty whilst your guard is down for maximum effect... They can't just live with things being calm and peaceful and bein…
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/26 01:35 PM
4

Do not have a child with someone who has cheated on you and lied to you! Been there done that and got the tshirt, at first you will be happy but then the doubts will creep in, she's lied and cheated before what if the baby isn't mine? Then you have to live with having no idea if the baby is actually yours or not for 9 months + until you are able to do a DNA test which is a long time to spend fearing, worrying, doubting about the paternity of a child. In addition to this, the longer as a man you …
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/26 07:46 AM
6

Mate you are being Gaslit and your normal feelings and reactions to the things SHE DID WRONG and she is now portraying your feelings and reactions to the things she has done wrong as being the problem and it sounds like you are buying it. I've been in a very similar situation I was with someone who cheated many times and I stayed too long and it destroyed me I didn't heal at all from the cheating, lies, betrayals the entire time we stayed together in fact it made things worse because she would n…
/r/Divorce_Men03/07/26 03:36 PM
3

Are you me?
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/26 05:55 PM
1

I'm also very lonely and struggle with this on a daily basis, my ex cut me off from my friends and family and was coercive controlling and physically abusive towards me I've managed to reconnect with some people since the relationship ended but overall I'm still lonely and feel in hell, I'd love to be able to make some new friends but I don't know how to and I'm fearful of being hurt by people again.
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/26 07:12 AM
2

Thanks mate definitely needed to vent and it sounds like we have a similar rough time of it. Her solicitor is instructed by her so anything that her solicitor is doing / saying is being done under instructions from her but either way one or both of them are complicit. I'd say do not agree to only use ADR in the future because once they start flouting the order you want to be able to bring that back to court ASAP which is why I'm not going to be agreeing to ADR in the future. It really does cost …
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/26 09:13 PM
7

Yep they are lieing pieces of shit, my ex reported me to the police who investigated everything and said there's no evidence of any wrongdoing and this was with no input from myself so they saw straight through her bullshit and batshit 20 page statement and "evidence". She then tried to bring it all before the court and the judge said disagreements and different communication styles is not coercive control again no input from myself. But it seriously fucks me off and pisses me off all the fuckin…
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/26 07:46 PM
1

Have you reported her?
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/26 07:24 PM
1

I know how you feel I'm a little bit older than you but my ex was mentally and physically abusive and coercively controlled me, cutting me off from friends and family and stopping me doing things I used to love doing a lot of her tactics were based on berating and shouting at me for no reason and endless accusations constantly accusing me of things and guilt tripping and invasive actions and on top of this she cheated on me countless times despite it being her constantly accusing me she lied, ga…
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/26 07:20 PM
4

Why are they all full of absolute bullshit why do they all make false accusations of DV it's utter fucking bullshit and fucks me right off the fucking lies and no consequences fucks me off no end and I'm desperate for her to face some consequences for her bullshit DV lies, absolute fucking cunts.
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/26 01:14 PM
1

I'm interested and happy to help you out whilst potentially learning some things on managing my high conflict co-parenting situation.
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/26 09:32 PM
1

You're not alone, the false accusations are fucking disgusting, it shows what kind of people they actually are. Your story sounds very familiar.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/26 09:26 PM
2

Seriously why does this happen? How to counter it / stop it? I can't talk to her without her sending me spiraling into a panic attack.
/r/Divorce_Men26/03/26 10:33 PM
1

I don't have someone who can do it everytime, police station is a good idea but unfortunately none nearby
/r/Divorce_Men26/03/26 09:08 PM
3

You are literally me
/r/Divorce_Men26/03/26 07:52 PM
1

Yep false accusations
/r/Divorce_Men26/03/26 07:38 PM
1

Because there are ways to address drop offs so you aren't in constant fear about he-said she-said scenarios. What ways are these if you could share that would be really helpful?
/r/Divorce_Men26/03/26 07:10 PM
1

It infuriates me so much the lies, false accusations, making things up that's why I'm recording it all already experienced all of that and that's why I'm worried about it happening again. Sorry that you've had to go through something similar, surely nothing sticks if you've got evidence and recordings as well seems just as good as having someone else there.
/r/Divorce_Men26/03/26 06:30 PM
1

Over a year into the process and yeah even though she's all those things still miss her and want her and still feel like a piece of shit without her that no one else will ever want to go near.
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/26 09:03 PM
3

Buy a foldable play matt like the following for you and baby to both be on instead of being directly on the floor https://amzn.eu/d/00Qe8YD6 Buy rattles, baby books, baby toys, sensory toys and soft teddy's and bring these with you put them on the mat in reach of baby. You should definitely lay on the ground with baby being at eye contact level with baby is important for bonding and emotional connection. Also bring your own nappies, wipes, cream, change of clothes, bibs, muslin cloth. If baby is…
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/26 10:52 PM
2

Shit, sad, lonely, miserable and depressing as fuck.
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/26 10:08 PM
4

I'm over a year in... Things are still completely and utterly shit when do they start magically getting better?
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/26 10:07 PM
2

I feel this constantly alone and lonely been over a year since seperation for me the only time I don't feel alone is when I have my child rest of the time I just want this hell and pain and loneliness to end.
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/26 10:55 PM
1

Thanks for reaching out and sharing your experience it sounds very similar in a lot of ways to the things I've had to deal with and I'm sorry that you've had to go through similar shit it's awful and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. I'm currently in the process of sueing the police for false imprisonment on top of a custody battle and trying to come to terms with all the fucked up abusive shit my ex did to me, to be accused by her of the things that she actually did to me just adds insult to injury…
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/26 11:01 PM
2

Thanks for the reply I'm glad to hear things got better for you and that you are now thriving I hope to join you in that place one day. I used to love going to music festivals it was something me and my friends used to do all the time before my ex came along and stopped me doing those things and cut me off from those friends. I'd like to get back to doing and enjoying those things again but I've lost that friendship group and feeling like shit, panic attacks etc prevents me from going. I quit dr…
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/26 08:54 AM
2

Thanks for the reply, I'm sorry to hear you are struggling as well and that you are experiencing the twisting narrative of how the relationship actually was by your ex. Do they all go to some kind of school together after seperation / divorce where they all learn to completely twist the relationship and their ex? I don't get it. The void is very painful for both of us I feel like I'm in the middle of nothing I don't have my old life and I don't have a new life either. I hope things get better an…
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/26 08:50 AM
1

What's BPD? Sorry to hear you've been through very similar things I wouldn't wish what we've been through on anyone I'm glad to hear it does get easier with time though I guess I thought it would be much easier a year later not still feeling like im in absolute hell.
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/26 08:45 AM
3

Thanks for the suggestions I'm taking medication which I think has been helpful although it does numb me but it really helps me sleep. I gave up drinking shortly after we seperated and I don't want to go near weed. I am showing up for my son consistently and he loves being with me which I'm very thankful and grateful for. I run fairly regularly on the exercise side of things.
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/26 08:43 AM
2

Thanks for the advice and the numbers I guess it helps a little knowing there must be a lot of other people going through this hell. To be fair my career is going well so that's one aspect of life that is actually good along with my child. I'm kind of reluctant to make more money though as the more I make the more I have to pay her. I don't go the gym, maybe I should but I do run regularly I don't know I've got a fear of the gym I'm so skinny which is great for running but at the same time I hat…
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/26 08:39 AM
2

Thanks for the suggestion I actually have already done the email thing for my son I've been doing it for about 6 months now I write to him about me, about us, about my hopes for him, things I hope we can do together one day etc I send him pictures and videos of us from our time together, I occasionally write some poetry I send those to him too, I'm sure as he gets older his mum will poison him against me atleast this way there will always be a record of my love for him. I struggle with the joini…
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/26 08:29 AM
-4

Are you sure you weren't in an environment whereby your wife was making you angry and I'm not necessarily talking about in obvious ways but also in covert ways that destabilise you? Were you an angry person before you met your wife you said you always had anger issues in your marriage but is that the real you? Is that how you were before you met your wife? Sometimes there can be dynamics at play from one partner to another that completely destabilise someone without them even understanding or re…
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/26 10:33 PM
2

I know the pain also still love my ex and can't let her go over a year later it sucks and it hurts even though she did the worst things imaginable to me abuse, cheating, assaults. It doesn't make sense why I still feel this way but you aren't alone in feeling like this.
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/26 08:06 PM
1

Her telling me that she had cheated on me and lied to me and deceived me for years and years and then revealing more and more to me and then when I broke mentally and emotionally from it all and she left me she then made false accusations against me which the police arrested me for before dropping the case against me without even bothering to question me as there was no evidence of anything and then me realising as part of the investigation into me and documenting my entire relationship to defen…
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/26 05:19 PM
2

I can use the toilet without having to put the seat down and being berated for the 1 in every 100 time I forgot to do it. I don't get berated for not filling the water jug up every time I use it even though she was just as capable as me at filling it up 😂 and is it really that much of a hardship to do yourself that yoh have to berate someone over it when you can fill it up yourself on the occasions I forgot to do so, heaven forbid the times I forgot to fill it up it's not like I had work, a baby…
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/25 12:51 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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