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FuzzyKittenIsFuzzy Archive

View 5 posts and 152 comments by FuzzyKittenIsFuzzy on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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188

Men get plenty of compliments. They don't get compliments about the same things, and they don't seem to count the compliments they do get. "Cindy, this is Ron. Ron has an important position at Raytheon bringing him to our offices today so let's make him feel right at home." "Ron is one of our faster assembly line workers." "Ron is experienced at drive-thru so he'll be training you." "Ron is an involved parent." "It's so nice of you to say that, Ron." "Ask Ron. He knows what management wants with…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/22 05:01 PM
70

You just described the entire exmormon movement.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/21 07:56 AM
11

Your source is wrong. They grew up together.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 10:27 AM
22

IDK where you got this, he is 23.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 09:58 AM
87

It was framed as a pro life measure, which is why it's coming from Utah.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/21 04:36 PM
17

When you get in an argument and afterward you feel confused about whether they might be right, that does NOT indicate that they were "gaslighting" you or otherwise treating you poorly. It means you aren't as confident in your thoughts as you once were. That's it. You might be less confident because you learned something and you need to adjust your opinions accordingly. You might be less confident because a lot of people thought you were wrong and you assume groups of people tend to be more right…
/r/RPChristians23/02/21 07:25 AM
2

For regular foster care (not adoption) they actually pay you to do it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/21 10:23 AM
2

Adoption from foster care is free, but regular foster care takes it further- they literally pay you to do it. The pay isn't super high but it's definitely nice to have.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/21 10:21 AM
11

Foster care adoption is free! OP wanted international adoption, which is really expensive, but there are other options.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/21 08:24 AM
2

If I really loved diamond I would have gone that route. I didn't have a particular interest in diamond other than the tradition, and the tradition leaves a nasty taste in my mouth after I learned more about the artificial scarcity (from slavery) propping it up, so that's why I went with a different rock. I use CZ purely for fun costume jewelry and the lack of value doesn't bother me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 12:07 AM
2

I'm a big CZ fan because I think the diamond mining business can't be trusted. I don't want a rock with value dependent on artificial scarcity created by slavery. My main ring is ruby but I never planned to wear it daily as a healthcare worker. How well does ruby hold up over time?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 05:15 PM
71

Came here to say this. Here is proof that pr0n and other sex workers are not respected. It's not an empowering occupation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 05:02 PM
87

FYI for anyone unaware: autism spectrum disorders typically co-occur with low IQ, not high IQ. There are exceptions, but generally "My autism means I'm intellectually gifted!" is a coping mechanism and not actually the truth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/21 06:57 PM
6

The third link is broken.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/21 05:01 PM
46

He's pretending his partner is incapable of consent. Fantastic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/20 06:29 AM
8

She's just talking about the US.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/20 03:21 PM
29

I was also ugly at 18 and actually got hit on by randos in public more compared to a year later when I started looking good. They all had greasy hair, extraordinarily terrible social skills, visibly filthy clothing, etc. and were just generally creepy. They were also all much older than me. They saw an ugly 18 year old and figured I'd give them a chance when nobody else would.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/20 04:38 PM
25

Can't speak for her but a lot of people have religious/cultural prohibitions on divorce. There are countries in South America, for instance, where it's not even legal. Also, if they have kids together she may be able to better influence how he parents the children if they all live together. Men don't lose custody for mild neglect, and mothers never know about half the crap that goes down at dad's house, especially if the kids are really young. Vet, vet, vet. Some decisions can't be undone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/20 04:28 PM
56

And to death from falling down stairs. It can cause amniotic embolism ridiculously easily. I have a friend of a friend who died from falling down the three stairs in front of her house while pregnant.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/12/20 04:13 PM
5

Do you have a friend who would like it? Can it be modified by a jeweler into a different form of jewelry, like the central piece of a necklace?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/20 04:53 AM
5

2 Thess 3:10 applies here. It's not his job (or anyone else's) to look things up for you.
/r/RPChristians18/11/20 12:00 AM
5

She makes more than him, she dresses better than him, she puts more work into planning things than he does, she cooks for them... To me the huge question here is, why does she still have feelings for him? Why didn't she start to feel disgusted by his habits eight years ago? I can understand when people prefer a bad relationship to being single. It may not be the healthiest choice, but I at least get the thought process behind it. In this case, though, she has a lot going for her. From what you s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/20 07:23 AM
40

Some of these women are reacting to a past assault by practicing their right to consent. They need therapy. Some are doing it as a form of self harm. They also need therapy. I assume some have other motivations but I've personally seen those two.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/20 01:35 PM
3

She wanted attention so you went in the bedroom and... Locked her out of it? What?
/r/RPChristians23/12/19 11:12 PM
2

Same here.
/r/RedPillWomen10/11/19 04:28 AM
1

A number of them, starting with alternating between high confidence/optimism and depression, but also including biting off a lot at once, making big shifts in short periods, cheating (not always a sign of hypomania but often enough that it's worth noting when other flags are present), irritability, buying the entire sidebar at once, your depression history being severe enough to require hospitalization (again not always a sign of bipolar but worth noting when other red flags are present), the li…
/r/askMRP09/11/19 01:36 AM
2

You've been through hypomania twice? Your Bipolar diagnosis belongs in the main post. Or maybe you mean you've been depressed twice so you are able to accurately identify a different mental health issue which is notoriously difficult to see in oneself? That's just silly.
/r/askMRP08/11/19 07:55 PM
1

You are waving about a dozen red flags for hypomania. You need to talk to whoever manages your depression meds about hypomania ASAP. As in, today. Otherwise this repeating pattern is just going to keep repeating.
/r/askMRP08/11/19 07:22 PM
1

A man who really thinks she's irreplaceable would be willing to work to keep her from getting to the point where she's making arrangements to move out. If he doesn't think there's any chance she'll get to that point, then he won't do the work, but he'd be willing to do it if he thought there was a chance of it being necessary. So either her BF is ignorant of the possibility that she's really serious, or he doesn't care enough about the possibility to act. My guess in this situation is that he's …
/r/RedPillWives22/10/19 09:10 PM
0

If you're quite toned then yes that's not a good idea. My suggestion was assuming you want to give this any more of your time (to see if things can improve enough for you to be comfortable). If you don't want to give it more time, definitely don't fix your sex life!
/r/RedPillWives22/10/19 09:00 PM
1

I agree that's hard to reverse. She said they talked several months ago about how she's unhappy with the way things are. Perhaps that wasn't enough to signal "I might leave" but in most cases it should be a big enough hint.
/r/RedPillWives22/10/19 08:57 PM
-3

I'd probably sit down and brainstorm every possible thing that might give him the thought you're replaceable. I'd also probably fix your sex life ASAP.
/r/RedPillWives22/10/19 05:11 PM
-4

I agree there isn't much to add to that expect possibly reducing BMI to 19-20. Does he have available women around him with comparable traits? Could be a big factor in seeing you as replaceable. You'd have to somehow stand out from them as a better quality option.
/r/RedPillWives22/10/19 04:48 PM
-6

What's your BMI? What else about you would make him afraid to lose you? I'm guessing he won't commit because he thinks if you leave he'll find someone with more attractiveness and/or more attractive habits.
/r/RedPillWives22/10/19 04:15 PM
4

You have some serious misconceptions of the CC. If you were putting any logic at all into this, your two options would be your current BF and the richest guy who will commit for life, not the richest guy who will be your sugar daddy this year. A proposal of marriage is no guarantee and along with the rest of the commenters here I'm highly skeptical. CC isn't a permanent solution. You also have some strange ideas about "marrying down." If your BF is earning more than your dad did at that age, you…
/r/RedPillWives22/10/19 06:04 AM
5

From your past we know you'd rather have him be the breadwinner than avoid poverty. From your post we know you'd rather lose him than be impoverished again. What this tells us is: You are deeply committed to the idea that you shouldn't work very many hours if you're in a serious relationship. You are more committed to that idea than you are to your boyfriend. And that would work fine for you if you had the SMV your mother and her friends had when they were single. You could be with a man who has…
/r/RedPillWives21/10/19 04:42 PM
3

I'm not judging you but I don't think there's enough info here to answer you either. What makes it "obvious" that you don't have feelings for the rich guy? Why do you work only a few hours weekly if you are in poverty and strongly considering jumping ship from a man you do love from fear of poverty?
/r/RedPillWives21/10/19 05:37 AM
1

Yep. I think she is concerned about his fitness as a partner so she's throwing tests at him all the time, and generally in real life that means "trying to make him miserable" (LOL) whenever any small thing goes wrong.
/r/RPChristians18/09/19 08:50 AM
3

She's cranky from not sleeping well. Tell her you realize this and she should take a nap. After work when she's better rested, have sex. Then move on.
/r/RPChristians17/09/19 03:38 PM
7

You have the most workaholic hamster I have ever seen. I mean that completely literally, you're shattering records. She's actively having an affair, she announced she's choosing him over you, and you are doing literally nothing because "the stay plan is the same as the go plan." Seriously??? Heads up: the stay plan and the go plan eventually go different directions, and you have passed that fork in the road. Get a lawyer yesterday. Stop taking life advice from your wife's sister and figure out w…
/r/askMRP14/09/19 04:58 PM
3

"I want to send this to her" isn't "you do you." It's "I want to talk." In this case it's "I want to talk about how I'm right and you're wrong." This is not your frame. So why do you suddenly feel so good? Well, you think you're winning an argument even if she won't acknowledge it. "Being right" with words feels so good that some people settle for it and never bother being effective, attractive leaders who get results. "I'm not afraid of excommunication because I understand there's a place for d…
/r/RPChristians09/09/19 09:54 PM
4

He can't, because the academics disagree with him on this issue. Even the non-religious culture surrounding NT Israel considered it a crime for a man to sleep with an unmarried daughter of a Roman citizen. If a man wanted to have sex he could visit a prostitute or a men's bath, but propositioning unmarried women was punishable. Again, this is the non-religious culture. The Jews and Christians were stricter.
/r/RPChristians16/08/19 02:59 AM
2

I can't tell people my goals because I'm very sensitive about them. I'm a woman and I still feel like I need a shot of testosterone after reading that.
/r/RPChristians16/08/19 02:51 AM
2

Spot on.
/r/RPChristians15/08/19 08:59 PM
2

You went through the required questions but you didn't answer most of the last one, the one about faith. You mention that God has blessed you with good genes, so I assume you believe in God. You mention that you participate in outreach events at church. That's about it. You also put in italics that your church forbids premarital sex, suggesting you disagree with that ideal. What do you believe in terms of faith? (Both in general and as it applies to theology of marriage and sex.) Do you have per…
/r/RPChristians15/08/19 08:38 PM
3

FYI "The Lord helps those who help themselves" is not a Bible quote.
/r/RPChristians14/04/19 11:32 PM
8

Holy post history, Batman. You've been on TRP and etc for 2+ years. Your 40+ lb overweight girlfriend got sick of you being boring and failing fitness tests over and over (including accepting her request for a 3some with another man!) so she finally dumped you just recently so she could find someone more worthy of respect. Maybe instead of reading more and obsessing about how to meet women, you could start applying the reading you've already done. At this point, lifting the books would probably …
/r/RPChristians14/04/19 07:00 PM
3

Citation needed since historically the command to care for widows has been taken to include considering them for marriage. This isn't even in line with the research on female sexual bonding.
/r/RPChristians22/03/19 09:14 PM
7

I suspect widows were discouraged for priests because of the inheritance issues it created with the children from the new marriage and how that affected a genetic priesthood. This would absolutely not apply to Christians, who are encouraged to care for widows up to and including marriage.
/r/RPChristians22/03/19 04:45 PM
3

Laura Doyle's RPW type following is mostly religious. They tend to be on FB rather than Reddit, like most women's groups.
/r/RPChristians17/01/19 04:25 PM
1

The Bible doesn't come with its own dictionary of ancient Hebrew and Greek. If you want to know what's meant by a word you have to use a regular, standard dictionary of ancient Hebrew/Greek. Basically the question you're asking becomes whether the people back then thought that the word fornication just meant PiV intercourse or whether it was broader. Spoiler: it was broader.
/r/RPChristians05/12/18 05:36 AM
3

I can't figure out how your encouraging messages would even help her. if she's "in a bad place mentally," she needs coping skills or mental health treatment or both. She doesn't need someone artificially propping up her emotions with a regular infusion of "encouragement." That would only encourage her lack of independent coping, which will prolong her emotional problems. External validation isn't going to teach her how to manage her feelings. It isn't even going to teach her that she needs to le…
/r/RPChristians19/08/18 09:45 PM
3

So why are you on MRP?
/r/askMRP06/07/18 11:16 PM
–

Having a hard time keeping weight due to the nausea/vomiting, but as soon as that clears up I'll PM you!
/r/askMRP15/02/17 09:44 AM
2

Also necessary context for your original post, don't you think? If you want her out of bed doing stuff, you're going to need to invent a way she can do that without burning any calories whatsoever. Alternatively you can start feeding her stuff to try to get her weight up, and once that happens you can try to get her out of bed.
/r/askMRP15/02/17 01:33 AM
–

If you are walking almost everwhere minimum 2k daily, how is she spending all day in bed? Either you are walking her everywhere and she's exhausted from walking and pregnancy, or you are letting her lay in bed "all day." I strongly suspect the former. This is pretty necessary context for your original post, don't you think? She's going to tire super easily due to pregnancy, and you're probably tiring her on a daily basis, which is probably why she is laying in bed! Also, your comment in general …
/r/askMRP15/02/17 01:29 AM
–

I'm pregnant. I tend to go to work no matter what. I've gone to work with undiagnosed double pneumonia. I had to take a day off work last week from nausea/vomiting and exhaustion. Maybe have the same expectations (at least first trimester) that you'd have for someone with stomach flu.
/r/askMRP14/02/17 07:41 AM
1

He's gay. Probably, he'll marry a woman someday. She'll probably be desperate enough to get married that she'll happily ignore all the red flags. (In some cases people knowingly enter mixed orientation marriage if there's enough social pressure!) They'll have kids and a dead bedroom. It sounds like that's what he wants more than a fulfilling sex life. That's his choice to make, as long as he isn't endangering anyone by faking monogamy while spreading STIs. Probably he won't lift because he's sca…
/r/askTRP06/01/17 02:01 PM
–

IMO this depends on whether he still does what he wants or if he's trying to do things your way to get points
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/17 01:43 PM
3

Sorry, mate. :/
/r/askMRP05/01/17 01:17 PM
–

I deal with SSRIs at work. Not saying it's impossible, but out of hundreds of cases I've never seen that, not even once.
/r/askMRP05/01/17 01:15 PM
–

This is not true for the vast majority of women on SSRIs.
/r/askMRP05/01/17 01:04 PM
–

If she has occasional spotting, not full heavy periods, it's hormonal. The other option is copper and that makes periods heavier and doesn't change cycle lengths.
/r/askMRP05/01/17 01:02 PM
–

If she's on a hormonal iud, she's not ovulating. Full stop. There may be very slight ups and downs in the hormones but they will be extremely, extremely slight. IUDs release very consistently. The days she's feeling "hormonal" are normal bad days and hormones are her explanation for it.
/r/askMRP05/01/17 10:43 AM
3

Right. And she can and should let him do it his way. She can also mitigate the damage to her family members' wallets by dropping some info to them as a part of normal conversations.
/r/RedPillWives31/12/16 01:22 AM
2

My understanding of her worry (could be wrong) is the expense of the flights for her family, since it's been decided they aren't eloping.
/r/RedPillWives30/12/16 03:30 PM
2

He wants to give out the date via cards. If OP calls all his family members to inform them of the date of the wedding he's not going to be happy. On the other hand, calling your aunt to chat and happening to mention the date of your wedding is a normal thing to do. It's not an awkward "Hi, you don't know me, but FYI I'm marrying your nephew and here's the date because you're not going to get an STD card anytime soon." I don't think it's manipulative or disrespectful to mention a date in a nice p…
/r/RedPillWives30/12/16 02:54 AM
2

The vow thing is bothering you and that emotion is coming out in the rest of the planning. Work through that emotion. Either come up with a solution (two sets of vows, a compromise, whatever) or let it go. Then you'll be calmer about the other stuff.
/r/RedPillWives29/12/16 09:57 AM
3

You tried having sex with her. It went well. Maybe try that again. Also, saying "we have to be together for NYE" and saying "you're my wife and I think you should be with your husband" are two different things. You said the latter, which is a good start. Now plan something amazing. Also consider refusing to pay for her to do stuff you find disrespectful. If she needs social interaction that badly she can get it while working part time to fund her own girl trips.
/r/askMRP29/12/16 09:08 AM
6

What's wrong with being vocal about your thoughts? Presumably it's temporary given the therapist is expecting you to get better with treatment.
/r/RedPillWomen26/12/16 08:41 PM
3

Relevant flair :)
/r/RedPillWives17/12/16 06:20 PM
2

Michelle comes across as very polished, rational, and supportive. No complaints here.
/r/RedPillWives10/08/16 11:06 AM
10

My favorite thing to come out of that thread was the term "placeholder girlfriend" for the girl who is good enough for a couple of years until someone better comes along. That's two pre-wall years given up for nothing, even though the man was technically exclusive.
/r/RedPillWives07/04/16 07:59 AM
1

Whether you alpha up to get her back or alpha up to get someone else, step one is getting these finances in order. Her debt, her problem. Also, other than iois, what makes you think she'd take you back? She's been with two alphas despite the messy house. You're a beginner with beginner optimism.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/01/16 05:26 PM
6

Have you talked to your mother in law about this? He obviously wants you to praise these behaviors like she does, and it's not clear whether this is simply a learned habit from his early childhood or whether there is more going on here, e.g. in his family it's a way to emphasize that they enjoy each other even despite each other's weaknesses. His mom may be able to shed some light on this for you, and she may even be willing to be less exuberant in her praise of the behavior (or even start telli…
/r/RedPillWomen13/12/15 10:24 AM
2

Ok here's my specific recommendation. Make a list of bills so you know the monthly total. If it varies, use the higher end total. Decide how much you want him to pay toward this total. Tell him the amount. If he says his portion should be different, come to an agreement with him that you can both live with. Set up your account to transfer your portion of "bill money" into the joint account every month or twice a month or whatever. With his permission, do the same with his account. Have the bills…
/r/RedPillWomen17/11/15 12:07 AM
2

Leaving aside the "equal contributor" bit because I don't know what that would look like in real life, and I suspect you don't either... You listed three main problems. His paperwork is disorganized, his license is expired, and he pays bills late or with bad checks. We already talked about being his paperwork secretary. You already threw a fit about his license and it's probably best to leave that ball in his court permanently now that you've messed up the conversation. That just leaves finances…
/r/RedPillWomen16/11/15 07:00 PM
2

There is nothing wrong with being his secretary, if he is open to that. Depending on your relationship it might be ok for you to just start filing his stuff when he leaves it out, or you might want to ask first. You would definitely want to ask before you start going through his desk or wherever, though. I'm talking about stuff he abandons on the living room table for a couple of days. If he isn't organized by now, he probably won't ever be organized, and you can do some of it as his domestic he…
/r/RedPillWomen16/11/15 06:04 PM
16

Why would he lead when your relationship already has a leader more competent than he would be? If you don't want to be the leader, you have two options. Stop leading and see if he eventually starts trying to learn to lead, or skip that and dump him now.
/r/RedPillWomen16/11/15 05:34 PM
9

I agree. My husband is not mature about handling grown-up finances and my options were to control all the money while he resents me and tries to sneak cash, or give him the checkbook and let him teach himself in a sink or swim manner. Of course I let him know he can always ask me questions or ask for help with how to set up a budget, etc., but he declined. I also pointed out the personal finance books on my shelf and he eventually picked one up. He screwed up a checking account so badly it was c…
/r/RedPillWomen16/11/15 05:30 PM
3

Your work when he is home is to spend time with him. If your job was to entertain diplomats and they had to wait for you to do your very important tasks, they would be angry, and rightly so. Do those tasks when he is away or busy. Cleaning, dishes, freezer meals should all be done another time. When he wants your attention, that is your job. Show up and pay attention to him. This is not playing before work is done, it's your most important work. Thinking of time with him as play and prioritizing…
/r/RedPillWomen09/11/15 05:31 AM
2

If he's a spender, the savings have to get processed like a "bill" right when the money arrives. Otherwise he'll spend it. I agree with others. Get separate accounts for savings and bills. He can drain the other account if he wants. He'll have a good idea of what's available without having to remember what bills are coming due.
/r/RedPillWomen09/11/15 05:18 AM
5

Because he'd rather complain about it than take charge and do something about it. Just like with all the other issues he has with his kids (and his ex).
/r/RedPillWomen21/10/15 05:48 AM
2

You say he wants space for his kids, you say he doesn't care about moving away from his kids, and so on. So, why doesn't he want to move? Do you even know? Either he is not telling you something, or you are not telling us something. This exactly. OP said "I'm concluding that it's about committing in general (taking risks) or committing to me, specifically." She needs to ASK him what this is about, not conclude that it's about commitment. But this guy is really good at saying what she wants to he…
/r/RedPillWomen21/10/15 05:40 AM
2

Things that wouldn't change even if you got a new place together: -His ex walks in unannounced and is rude to you. (He has not gotten her to stop this now, why would she stop if you move? Sure she won't live as close, but she'll be there all the time to drop off and pick up kids.) -He doesn't fix stuff so the home starts "falling apart". -You can't have downtime because a kid can walk in at any moment, and that makes you anxious. And when the kid walks in they might eat something (not sure why t…
/r/RedPillWomen21/10/15 05:34 AM
4

This sub strikes me as an example of Titus 2: train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands
/r/RedPillWomen21/10/15 05:01 AM
2

When a formerly promiscuous woman posts here and is interested in rebuilding to the extent that is still possible, I'm not inclined to rub her past in her face. I'm more inclined to say "yeah that's gonna be an issue but let's try to make your overall SMV as good as possible regardless." I don't think there's any reason for these ladies to give up on their remaining SMV potential, however low it might be. But when ladies are looking for warm fuzzy comfort a la "it's all OK, no worries!" I cringe…
/r/RedPillWomen12/10/15 07:55 AM
2

We do craft night where everyone brings their own craft and their own supplies. Some people bring a laptop and do electronic scrapbooking, some people bring knitting, art supplies, etc. I've brought my backlog of mending before. Everyone brings a large dish of an appetizer or dessert to share instead of a regular dinner potluck. We've also talked about doing a hot tub night instead of crafts but it hasn't happened yet. We used to do a "book club" but craft night has been much more fun and causes…
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/15 07:53 AM
2

look at him and really take in his masculinity. I think of how he has provided a roof for our head... I might not have the "sexys" but I have a heart full of gratitude. I'll try this, thanks.
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/15 04:54 AM
1

Touch sensually without it leading to sex... on a daily basis.... enthusiastically complimenting him on aspects you find attractive about him.... groping him in a drive-by sort of way. I'll try these, thanks.
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/15 04:47 AM
2

This marks the first time I've read "withhold sex" as advice in RPW.
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/15 02:55 AM
2

1) Good for you with quitting the sex/pot/party lifestyle and starting to dress like a grown-up. Do try to find ways to express strong emotion without cursing, though. 2) It sounds like you need basic social skills. You grew up in the "gifted classroom" which isn't traditionally a great place to learn those things. Plus you were busy trying to care for yourself emotionally in the face of a difficult childhood, which took a lot of energy that otherwise would have gone into skills development. The…
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/15 07:13 PM
3

a picture of her and her bf showed up in his fb feed and he asked me if I thought he was more attractive than him. To me this is the #1 red flag in your post that not only is she still going after him, he's still attracted to her too. Maybe he thinks of her as too crazy to be worth a relationship, but his stated goal right now is to help her be less crazy, right? Part of him is hoping they can get back together someday.
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/15 06:56 PM
4

the placeholder LTR who never got married This is a nice, concise way of describing a situation that isn't very easy to describe. So many of these girls show up in this sub. I'm particularly thinking of the "Am I a plate?" post from several weeks back.
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/15 06:54 PM
2

I'm not naturally very feminine so I've been working on cultivating that in many ways. From what I can tell, weight/fitness is the #1 most important thing for a woman's SMV, so shame on me for letting that slide. #2 seems to be hair/makeup/clothes and I'm doing better at that one. I need to stay more organized and not focus so much on one piece while letting another one slip.
/r/RedPillWomen20/09/15 03:44 AM
2

In the last several months I have gained some weight and I'm now slightly overweight. I've increased my aerobic exercise and started a Whole30 to lose it again. It hadn't occurred to me that he might be more motivated to do better once I lose the weight so I will cross my fingers on that one. Then again I was thinner when the foreplay stopped and when I introduced him to RP stuff so it may or may not work. I'll plan to get fit and up my girl game in other areas and see if the combination is more…
/r/RedPillWomen20/09/15 03:37 AM
3

I showed him RP stuff several months ago when I was first getting into it. He tried acting more alpha for about six weeks and then stopped. He was not interested in reading any of it on his own. I think the fact that I was the one who introduced it to him made him feel like reading it or acting in that manner would be giving into me controlling him, ironically. He is extremely sensitive to that. If I make a big deal about praising something it does not make a significant difference about how lik…
/r/RedPillWomen20/09/15 03:09 AM
2

Would having a glass of wine be an option for you? It takes about three to get me more open to sex, so it's an option sometimes but not every time. I can try to do that more as soon as I'm done with the Whole30 I'm currently doing. If not wine, then I would try anything else to relax your body a bit. I know yoga has been thought (just one limited study) to increase sex drive in women. I've been wanting to do yoga. I might try this. I also sometimes like to take a bath if I'm anticipating sex lat…
/r/RedPillWomen20/09/15 03:03 AM
5

foreplay won't fix the underlying issue, which is a lack of attraction, but it will might you less resentful...maybe. Has he let himself go over the course of your marriage? I think this is a factor. Yes, he's not as fit (or as attractive in other ways) as when we met. But back to you, since you're the only one you can change in this scenario. Exactly. Thanks for continuing and not just going with the "he's let himself go, so you should try to fix him" idea like the man above. are you overweight…
/r/RedPillWomen20/09/15 02:59 AM
2

How attracted to your husband are you? Not particularly. I'm sure things would be easier if I were. Luckily, women have ridiculously powerful powers of persuasion over men so you should be able to use that to build him... Encourage... behavior, get him..., make sure he's..., and just get him ... You could even get him to... Been there, done that, he doesn't like being "encouraged" or otherwise controlled. That's what brought me to RPW in the first place.
/r/RedPillWomen20/09/15 02:41 AM
3

I'll probably delete this comment in a few days b/c it's pretty personal. Has your libido always been low? No. Do you take any personal time for sex? just you getting to know you and your body more? [deleted as promised] Does starting out with oral help get you revved up a little more? [deleted as promised]
/r/RedPillWomen20/09/15 02:37 AM
4

"Relationship" is a term that might mean something different to you than to him. You might be thinking "exclusivity, both of us thinking about whether we would make good marriage partners, prioritizing each other over our friends, starting to mesh our long term goals, etc." and he might be thinking it means "I'm not allowed to have sex with anybody else until I get tired of having sex with her. This might last a couple of weeks, or maybe a couple of months, we'll see." Do you know how long his p…
/r/RedPillWomen20/09/15 12:50 AM
2

I agree with this. My mother is similar to OP's mother and our relationship improved noticeably (but not all the way) when I took the risk and set a boundary. She was being rude to me on the phone, and I said "Mom, I can't have a conversation like this with you. I need you to be more respectful or I'm going to have to hang up." She continued without even acknowledging that I had said anything, so I hung up. I expected her to have a meltdown about it the next time we talked, but she actually has …
/r/RedPillWomen20/09/15 12:43 AM
2

If you can wait until Black Friday there are always good sales on pea coats. Good quality pea coats are just as warm as ski coats for nearly all Utah weather patterns (you'll need a hood if there's heavy snowfall and obviously if you're skiing wear a ski coat). And they look MUCH better.
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/15 05:38 AM
4

Get a share of stock in a company with expensive shares. Then sell it after the class ends.
/r/RedPillWomen13/09/15 09:05 PM
2

the way we treat each other in public has become the gold standard in our friend group. Wow, way to go!
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/15 10:44 PM
3

I understand where they were coming from because my husband had done something quite serious and tried to cover it up, and was angry instead of apologetic when I discovered it. They have never suggested divorce to me for anything else. I'm still glad I didn't take their advice though.
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/15 04:41 PM
7

Probably as a way to avoid sex.
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/15 10:38 AM
4

Have you made him food? Honestly it sounds like his mind is made up, but if you are going to try anyway, food might be a good place to start.
/r/RedPillWomen09/09/15 10:35 AM
6

/u/miss-carried gave great advice. About living with your parents, I am not a man but I imagine it would be difficult to consider picking up a girl from her parents' home and dropping her off there again when it's just something casual. There's a threat of having to meet parents too early in a relationship and also a potential for being "in trouble" for bringing daddy's little princess home too late. Getting your own place might make dating you seem more like an option.
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/15 07:30 PM
6

For me it got better after we got married and then got worse when he broke my trust in some ways that were objectively quite serious. I have to decide every day whether I'm going to defend us from the world or fend strictly for myself. What helps me most is remembering that good boundaries and self care, but not maliciousness, are what is best for me and what's best for the relationship too. I structure things so it's almost never an either-or choice. YMMV.
/r/RedPillWomen04/09/15 07:52 AM
4

How is cleaning his house going to help straighten things out financially? Honestly the fastest way to overcome this pain and the drive to keep seeing him is to demonstrate to yourself that you are capable of attracting an even higher value guy. Moving might help with that but even going to the gym by yourself and noticing who noticed you could help. Right now it feels like he's the one for you and you just lost him, and that feeling is natural, but not factual. The sooner you can get in touch w…
/r/RedPillWomen04/09/15 07:42 AM
1

I have about 15 blouses from the Worthington brand at JCPenny and have worn this brand almost daily for the last three years. They pair well with skirts, slacks, nice jeans, and even casual jeans (though the latter aren't usually the best choice if you're trying to look good). They go on a deep sale for Black Friday, as do most of the dresses. So for my wardrobe I usually save for a few months in advance and purchase a large number of pieces once a year during that sale. In the meantime you can …
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/15 08:19 PM
7

This is very important for the unmarried ladies in this sub. If I had been RPW before choosing a spouse perhaps I would have looked for other qualities. But many RPWs here on this sub got married before coming here and now we are trying to make the best of it. We can't just assume that our men think like you think.
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/15 07:47 PM
6

To me this is a very male sounding comment. From my female perspective, the worst that can happen is he doesn't learn a lesson and he keeps getting us into similar situations for the next 50 years. And also, that his paychecks stay exactly the same so it's harder for me to buy what I need since we have to pay for his mistakes. So my temptation is to teach him the lesson like I'm his mom. "You really should have taken care of this earlier. See what happens when you leave things for the last minut…
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/15 07:27 PM
2

Most neuroses don't take years of intensive therapy. Child abuse issues sometimes do, but (as an example) CBT for a specific phobia is generally 6-8 weeks of once weekly sessions and usually provides a good result within that time frame. Even at-home treatments like yoga and mindfulness can reduce many people's propensity to anxiety at other times of the day, if practiced as a regular regimen. Self-help CBT workbooks are about $15 and can be very useful for people who actually use them regularly…
/r/RedPillWomen28/08/15 06:06 PM
3

I have this strange fear of car accidents This is your problem and you have a responsibility to fix it. If your fear were rational, you could present him with your fear and see what he does with it. "Honey, I feel scared when I'm in a car going this fast." But you yourself are admitting your fear is irrational. It isn't his problem. How do I ask him to drive slower Don't. Once you get to a place where your fear is reasonable and not "strange" then you can share the problem with him. You shouldn'…
/r/RedPillWomen28/08/15 05:47 PM
2

When he said that housekeeping is an unnecessary expense, where was Is that coming from? Did he have a mom who did it all while working?Did he have a dad who was offended by women getting help at home? I wonder if it would help to figure out why he has a hard time noticing that you are at a breaking point and responding to that.
/r/RedPillWomen18/08/15 03:12 PM
13

You're asking how to keep rpw frame when you have to not only do your tasks, but also serve as primary breadwinner. I don't have any answers for that situation. I'm not sure anyone else here does either, unfortunately.
/r/RedPillWomen17/08/15 10:25 AM
16

Thank you for being willing to stick to the sidelines when you don't know the answer. Some man in here last week genuinely suggested a woman send her boyfriend flowers at work, then excused it by explaining he was just thinking about what he does for his girlfriend, as though that made it better somehow.
/r/RedPillWomen13/08/15 01:15 PM
9

"I had some problems with self esteem when I was a teen and I self medicated with guys. It's not who I am now and I'm very ashamed of it. I haven't done anything like that in a very long time. And I've spent a lot of time addressing the problems that led me to it." Yes that will make them think less of you, but if you have proven your worth in other ways before this comes up, you may still be able to come out of the conversation with a functional relationship. edit:typo
/r/RedPillWomen10/08/15 05:08 PM
8

I would agree with this except she can't finish without her device, even by herself. There's definitely a problem here with how complacent she is with that dynamic.
/r/RedPillWomen30/07/15 05:41 AM
2

How long is this taking and what is happening while he waits? Are you using a device while he's sitting nearby waiting for 2-10 minutes? Because I imagine he could get bored very quickly like that. I know I would.
/r/RedPillWomen30/07/15 05:39 AM
20

I think you guys are talking about two different things. To cause damage to nerve sensitivity you'd have to use it constantly. But to train your body to respond more to certain stimuli and less to other stimuli is very possible with normal use.
/r/RedPillWomen30/07/15 05:37 AM
6

he didn't see a foreseeable end to us. Yes, because there is not currently any reason for him to dump you. He is getting all the benefits without having to commit. There are no girls in his life he would rather be with right now. But if he's saying he doesn't see an end to your relationship, and he's still refusing to commit, I hear that as "A reason why I would dump you might come up, but it hasn't yet." Or more particularly, "a girl I like better might come along, but I haven't met her yet."
/r/RedPillWomen30/07/15 03:19 AM
8

If he were planning to be longer term with you, this wouldn't be a problem.
/r/RedPillWomen29/07/15 03:21 PM
7

No, creepy as in I would expect them to own a rape van.
/r/RedPillWomen21/07/15 05:05 PM
26

I read some RP blog once that suggested low-value women get a lot of public attention from gross men who think they can pick up these women. It was true for me- when I was in my late teens/early 20s and insecure, if I went to the store without makeup I would get all kinds of creepy compliments from very creepy men. I looked easy to pick up. When I started taking care of myself these creepers knew I was out of their range and I am no longer bothered in public.
/r/RedPillWomen20/07/15 05:26 PM
3

I'd ask if he can hire a third person. Aside from that, I'd keep a list of things he's mentioned he finds relaxing, and keep them on a regular rotation.
/r/RedPillWomen14/07/15 04:15 PM
2

What is Sufism?
/r/RedPillWomen11/07/15 10:09 AM
3

He's taking a break from work and you work at home, and his family isn't in his life. Now he's getting worked up about little things and not letting them go. Maybe he needs some bigger picture things in his life. DH often responds well to a change of scenery, getting out of his physical bubble. Can you get your partner out of the house when this happens? Even a picnic dinner would help my man when his perspective is getting a little too limited, and I wonder if it would help yours too.
/r/RedPillWomen06/07/15 04:02 PM
3

What did you do that helped?
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/15 07:51 AM
1

Sounds interesting.
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/15 06:06 AM
5

Gift? Remove the word "tis" from your vocab immediately. Be sure your post provides something of value to OP and it is on topic, if not then post it to your blog or diary instead. And in RP subs, make sure you are displaying some understanding of smv.
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/15 04:27 PM
1

Are there medical or psych problems that may have decreased his drive? Is your smv lower than his?
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/15 04:22 PM
3

There's probably a reason he's not comfortable asking you to do little things. Maybe it's the way he was raised, or a past girlfriend was upset by it. If you can help him be a little more demanding you'll both enjoy it. Find ways to ease him into saying what he wants.
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/15 04:19 PM
3

Other than the visits every other month, how are you providing for his sex and food needs? Do you make frozen meals he can reheat? Are the Skype calls nude? Do you add surprise extra visits? Can you fly out right now and remind him why he likes you? I would also bring up moving back soon and see if he is enthusiastic about it. If not, it's over. If so, try to make it realistic, or at least double the amount you see him and get your long distance game way up immediately.
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/15 04:11 PM
2

I did this with complaining and it has definitely helped me become more aware of it, even years later.
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/15 04:49 AM
7

No, the defeatist things you're saying and your seeming unwillingness to reply with "I'll try that" come across like you're making excuses.
/r/RedPillWomen29/04/15 09:03 AM
4

Yes, that's why I indicated it would be to supplement what you get in your group.
/r/RedPillWomen29/04/15 03:51 AM
5

If you're doing what everyone else is doing (dropping off resumes) you will get the same results everyone else is getting (i.e. none). That's what I meant by thinking outside the box. Borderline is notorious as a relationship wrecker. Good thing you're in therapy. My thoughts, which are probably worth nothing, but here you go: you can do a Dialectical Behavior Therapy workbook at home with your therapist's approval, to supplement what you get in your group. McKay's is a good one IMO especially i…
/r/RedPillWomen29/04/15 03:29 AM
4

By BPD do you mean bipolar or borderline? They have way different effects on relationships. But either way, the solution is going to be to 1) minimize the effects your illnesses have on a potential relationship by getting your symptoms well contained, and 2) get your game up in every other area. Since I'm not even sure what you mean by BPD I'll talk about point 2. If there are no jobs and you need a job to be an attractive person, you're going to have to get a job anyway. That's going to require…
/r/RedPillWomen29/04/15 02:40 AM
2

If he isn't trying hard enough with them and/or they aren't getting prime slots, he is prioritizing you. Given that you said he's husband material, I'd focus on how to get this relationship to the next level rather than focusing on how to make your next relationship a non-plate one. You're being insecure about how your past (before you learned better) reflects on your fitness as a partner. Think of discovering TRP as a born again experience. "I grew up being taught feminism would make me happy. …
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/15 11:16 PM
5

If he wanted to marry you, would this guy be husband material?
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/15 05:55 PM
3

would see it as attention seeking if it is mentioned immediately. Very important point that I think was mostly missed in this thread.
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/15 02:16 AM
2

I love how clearly you explained that. Saved for future reference.
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/15 02:06 AM
2

I think OP has some kind of 1950's fetish where everything is pure and delightful and women are virgins until marriage and they make all their food and clothing from scratch. Until the 1960's, everyone (including men) did the right thing all the time, including marrying for love and other platonic reasons and not for sex or other dirty carnal desires. RPW encourages women to get back to that pure, innocent state of affairs before the sexual revolution ruined it all, because it's simply the right…
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/15 01:56 AM
3

Going on a few dates and making sure to bring up the virginity clause BEFORE getting exclusive makes perfect sense to me. Waiting until he's asking for an exclusive relationship, i.e. waiting until he's already gotten rid of any other women in his life, WOULD be a problem in my mind. But as long as she shares her values before that point I think she's completely in the clear. People date in order to get to know other single people, to see if a relationship is a possibility. Disclosing her virgin…
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/15 01:34 AM
2

Well said.
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/15 01:29 AM
2

TRP isn't about being traditional as much as it is about learning how people are wired and making use of that knowledge. Men are hardwired to push for sex. Even in the 50s, men slept around when they could get away with it. It was women who were virginal before marriage. Given that fact, and given that you are not wanting a religious man, and given that it's rare for men to decide to remain virgins for non-religious reasons, almost 100% of the men you meet will want to have sex with you before m…
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/15 12:49 AM
30

I'd say you dodged a bullet with that one but more likely you dodged a speeding car. Sorry it didn't work out, but I sure wouldn't want to date a guy who drives drunk so I'm glad you found that out right away. Wow.
/r/RedPillWomen08/12/14 06:55 PM
3

About boys and ADHD: animal studies were so clear that screen time for small children changes brain development and causes ADHD that the studies couldn't be done with humans. Most of the increasing diagnosis rate is because of this, not because of schools being set up for girls. They are set up for girls, but the ADHD issue being attributed to feminism is actually prevent some families from being OK with treating a child who really needs it, thinking the diagnosis is just a reflection of society…
/r/RedPillWomen05/12/14 06:53 PM
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