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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
65

How-To High ValueGhost_namesake/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/20 05:41 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
19

I did this too. In fact, I did a DIY divorce at lighting speed before the LVM could think. I was able to protect all of my retirement savings...he had none. The other thing I did for myself was stay an extra 6 months and put money aside in a separate account for my moving expenses. Putting aside money will be the best thing you can do for yourself. Money will get you where you need to go much easier.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/22 03:17 AM
1

It's not something I advertise. I don't have any children or ties to my ex, so it's not like it changes anything. He's been blocked in every sense from my life. It's something that would be appropriate to talk about at the right stage of your relationship. You'll have to decide when you reach that stage.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/22 02:45 AM
71

I'm an avid hiker. I can't believe he didn't make sure she got back to her car safely. If someone goes out with you, you are responsible for each other's safety as a team.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 03:15 AM
7

Not sure of the answer, but that sounds scary and unhealthy. I've been there too. It's so easy to look back and see clearly what choices you should have made. Now you know and you will be ready to stand up for yourself in the future. I had an ex that would do this stuff too. It seems like coercion or at least manipulation to me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 03:03 AM
22

My thoughts exactly
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 02:38 AM
7

This is horrifying. I tried a chores app to get my NVM ex to help around the house. I was exhausted from doing everything. He did it with nagging. I don't know why I put up with garbage treatment for so long. Never again!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 10:01 PM
17

That's how it seemed to me. He wants to benefit off her death and probably chose her because she has no children. She has every right to know the percentages as he has every right to know hers. Why shouldn't she pass on the same percentage to her heir as he is to his?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 09:19 PM
14

Being childfree, I would definitely do the same thing. It's apples to apples. Of course he will want to leave his son something, but just because she doesn't have biological children doesn't mean she won't have an important person she would like to leave money for too. It's her money. She can do whatever she wants. I think that's a completely fair way to do it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 09:13 PM
5

Keeping up a friendship with an ex is just weird (unless there are kids involved). What a waste of time. It screams of the inability to move on... So desperate and pathetic. Being civil or cordial is one thing, but texting each other and doing other friendship stuff is clingy can't-move-on behavior. Gross Edited: changed can to can't. I meant "can't move on"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 09:08 PM
8

I said the same thing. Yikes
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 01:43 AM
6

I would just show the screenshot to everyone. Put it on twitter. These creeps thrive by doing things in the dark where they have no accountability. Bring it out into the light
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/04/21 05:33 PM
69

I never notice other people's legs, but I always worry they will notice mine! Funny how that works.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/04/21 10:16 PM
12

Fingers work well too. He just needs to be attentive to you and the sex needs to be fulfilling. You are allowed to be creative because one size doesn't fit all. The difference between a partner who just does the stuff and one who is actually attentive and good at sex with you is HUGE. You'll know it when you find it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/21 02:19 PM
7

That is so gross
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 07:42 PM
27

I didn't realize until recently how badass my grandma was. In the 1960s she was a bank teller and had a family. My grandpa got laid off from his mill job and my grandma supported the whole family as primary earner! I remember her telling me that the bank manager paid her less than her male co-worker, who did the same exact job, because "he had a family to support". We've come a long ways, but we still have a lot to do. You're so right, it shouldn't be financial 50/50, it needs to be household 50…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 06:02 PM
87

I wish my mother had taught me how to make and enforce boundaries. I'm just now learning.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/21 11:26 PM
2

I should do that on the down low! I would say half the men were cruddy, but the other half thought it was fun.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/21 02:34 AM
94

They're just jealous because she's gorgeous and smart. They would never have the slightest chance with her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/21 12:02 AM
22

I loooove Valentine's Day! I think the cheesy hearts are so fun. My mom always gave us little Valentines and made us feel special. As I grew older, I gave Valentines to my parents, sister, and classmates. It wasn't a romantic love thing, so much as a celebration of love in general to me. I give my dogs Valentines now. When I first started my job, I bought those silly little kids punch out Star Wars Valentine cards, and handed them out to my coworkers with truffles. It was universally loved by my…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/02/21 11:59 PM
6

I would say, do group dates as a teenager. Learn to set boundaries and know what you want. I wish I had done more dating as a teenager. I found one boy and fell for him and tried so hard. He was terrible in every possible way, but I thought if I just loved him enough, I could fix him. That's where the trouble started. I wish I would have kept my options open and made boys persue me. I don't think there's a magic age. Everyone is different.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/02/21 04:05 AM
96

I've said it before, and I'll say it again, any woman on here could have a man in her bed within the hour if she chose. The scrotes are angry because of this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 02:59 AM
18

From the ladies I've seen on here, I think we're actually quite diverse. Scrotes seem to go to the "you're ugly" card right away if they can't have a real intellectual debate. Boring!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 02:58 AM
21

You did what you had to do to survive. I'm glad you're safe now and at a place where you can share this. You know we all have your back!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/21 02:59 AM
14

You said it perfectly!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/21 07:08 PM
114

Coming from a law enforcement background, that's pure laziness. Your building doesn't have cameras? They can't check for fingerprints? They can't flat out ask him??? (He would probably admit it) Ridiculous
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/21 06:50 PM
48

I love this idea. I stuggle with people pleasing and self sacrifice. I wrote this mantra for myself: I do not have to people please, caretake, or self sacrifice to deserve love. It's a hard habit to break!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/21 06:47 PM
13

Me too haha
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/21 05:50 AM
14

I knew a doctor who drove an old minivan. I asked him why and he said he liked it, and it worked for taking his big dogs on outings. I think cars aren't very important as far as the "newness" of them goes. What's important is that you keep it tidy and maintained. As long is the car is reliable, I wouldn't waste money upgrading unless you use it a lot. Saving for a house is a much better investment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/21 03:04 PM
27

I'm glad I don't have children because of this. That's insane. How should the school be able to dictate out of school time?! You're the parent. You know what's best for your child.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 04:01 PM
13

You're absolutely correct.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 04:00 PM
19

Girl, yesss!!! You will feel so much better once you drop the extra weight. I went from 170 to 120lbs over 2 years. It's amazing how much more energy you have once you aren't carrying around so much extra. Do it for you! Yesss! Those dusty ass guys don't care about your weight as much as you think. They are just assholes. Think about all the fun stuff you can do as you begin to drop pounds. One thing I really love now is hiking. I was never an outdoors girl before, but now that I'm fit, it's so …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/02/21 11:19 PM
7

You're so right, that would be so awful to have that energy thrown at you. How disgusting!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/21 06:28 PM
19

They have a version of this for the boyfriend to wear and it's also vomit inducing. This girlfriend one is downright terrifying. You should never be with someone who you are scared of...EVER.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/21 03:38 PM
6

That's disgusting conduct and not a joke.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/21 04:38 PM
10

I dunno. I have an amazing new hair do, and I feel great. I have worked out hard and lost several clothing sizes. I'm strong, and I feel great! I think I look amazing and it gives me a lot of confidence. I bought myself new stylish clothes, and I love the way I look. I think those are all good things. The real question ladies need to think about: why am I doing these things? If you do them for yourself, then you're doing it right. If you're trying to impress someone, that's not going to work.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/21 01:14 AM
36

Same. I wasted so many years. Your 20s shouldn't be spent married. I think few people know themselves that well at that age.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 06:35 AM
9

Prepare food for another adult because the adult can't figure out how to feed himself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/21 05:47 AM
8

You are absolutely right. 12 is WAY too young. A person needs to have a firm understanding of what is healthy sex before they watch that fantasy nonsense. We are failing little boys by allowing them to learn about sex from porn. It just leads to disappointment and dysfunction!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/21 12:52 AM
4

Where do I start with this one?! What makes him think he can take away her private belongings?!! This made my blood boil. Run girl!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/21 12:39 AM
147

Women should be able to wear whatever they want. I will fight for a woman's right to wear a hijab. I will also fight against it being required. Women should be able to choose what is right for themselves without a bunch of scrotes telling them. I think you are totally onto something about being treated differently. I used to dress a lot more masculine. I've always been embarrassed of my body, so I never showed skin. I didn't like the male attention that came from wearing dresses or tight fitting…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/21 12:17 AM
21

Yeah.... Not good if he's saying that stuff.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 07:46 PM
37

This right here!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 07:43 PM
23

My thoughts exactly
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/21 05:56 PM
86

I'm sure she didn't because they lie and manipulate.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/21 03:29 PM
23

Yep. Been there. Done that. Never dating a man that can't buy his own clothes again. It's one thing to ask for help with style, but underwear is a personal responsibility.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/21 04:40 AM
7

PNW girl here too. I've found if I get heavy tights, they work okay if it's above 50°F. LoL! I like to dress up a bit, but it's just too cold to rock a little skirt most of the time. Especially now that there is no dine in at restaurants! Ugh!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/21 04:38 AM
4

Thank you for saying this. I actually saved "conceding isn't consent". Good reminder
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/20 07:20 PM
24

Good Lord, you must be a badass. How do you not hit people at work every day?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/20 04:39 PM
13

Same. That's so gross. Block 'em!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/20 04:36 PM
14

I wasted 8 years. It happens. Worrying about it isn't going to take it away. Take your lessons, go forth, and do better
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/20 01:06 AM
120

Let these poor young ladies enjoy their birthday celebration. If they wanted some creepo to come over, they would have invited him. I'll never understand why men think it's okay to bother women who are out having a good time together. I go out with the ladies because I want to have a good time, not to be bothered by a bunch of scraggly men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/20 12:36 AM
160

Girl, I have always wanted to be tall. You are sooo lucky and beautiful! How empowering. Im so happy for you that you're owning it now. Rock that height like a goddess!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/20 12:32 AM
5

Girl, at 14 I was the same. We just aren't taught any better. Being a 14 year old girl is hard! Hell, being a 19 year old woman is hard. You're very lucky to have found this sub. I wish I had found it sooner!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/20 03:16 AM
31

Abusers are convincing, otherwise they'd never be able to hook victims or maintain their facade.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/20 03:13 AM
56

They have a right to set rules for their child,.and she has a right to not agree. No one is forcing her to babysit. If she can't accommodate her rules then she should just bow out. The parents are perfectly within their rights to request what they did. It's probably a good idea to protect their baby this way. The world isn't friendly to girls.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/20 03:09 AM
39

Glad you and your boys are safe now!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/20 02:17 AM
6

I just threw up in my mouth
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/20 01:57 AM
6

Thanks for posting! I can't wait to watch
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/20 07:23 PM
15

Yessss
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/20 11:04 PM
17

I also love the banana one!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/20 11:04 PM
79

Seriously?! Gross
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/20 10:40 PM
14

Having messed up a lot in my 20s, here are the highlights: don't ever help a romantic partner financially. His problems are his own. Let him solve them don't make credit card debt. It becomes a problem really fast and will steal your future. I am proud of myself for paying off $25,000 in credit card debt. I have great credit now, but that was a HARD lesson know what is your responsibility. I have often found myself taking responsibility for solving the problems of others. never ever, ever, plan …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/20 12:21 AM
17

Your cat is very lucky to have such love! Seriously, loving and valuing my dogs is non-negotiable. They are my family. The man in seeing right now has passed that test so far. He genuinely gets excited when they choose to come get pets from him. Imo, kindness to your pets is a minimum. A HVM will not only be kind to your pets, but also offer help with them and interact with them. LVM will get jealous of the love you give your pet. Yuck!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/20 11:20 PM
15

My p.o.s. ex husband used to purposefully interrupt me when I tried to read before bed. I could never read with him around because he would ruin it and then laugh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/20 09:54 PM
3

Wtf...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/20 09:49 PM
4

Yep. This. I'm not convinced they did real research here. It sounds like they grabbed a small group of women and didn't put much thought into it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/20 05:04 PM
12

Truth bomb
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/20 04:54 PM
78

I think it's a relic from when the mothers packed their children's lunch to send them off to school, they did the same for their husband since they were already putting together lunches. It's not appropriate unless there is a division of chores, such as she is making lunches while he's getting the children dressed or serving them breakfast.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/20 04:24 PM
12

That sucks that you had such a bad experience with therapy. My therapist has helped me set healthy boundaries and stand up for myself. I'm glad you're free of these people now! My therapist has encouraged me to trust myself and my instincts. It sounds like you had some good instincts, but you were talked out of listening to them. I hope you can move forward with healing. What that ex did to you was very wrong.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/20 04:12 PM
10

Speak with a therapist. It sounds scary or dramatic, but it really isn't. Therapists are professionals and can help you sort through your feelings and memories. I've been seeing one and it's the best decision I ever made!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/20 04:01 PM
4

Thanks for the tip! This is fascinating. Thinking back over some of the weirdos I've met, I think you're on to something.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/20 03:57 PM
12

You didn't know any better. You were a child too. It's just horrific that children have to endure any of this. I can see how that kind of behavior would be difficult to negotiate as a child yourself. Most adults would be clueless on how to handle it, imo.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/20 10:49 PM
21

Yeah, I definitely agree with the second guy's response. I say we take it even further too. It's part of being a decent human being to help others be safe. Good for him for speaking up against misogyny. You're so right about basic human decency!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 11:36 PM
2

Yep. This!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 11:18 PM
125

My thought is, we should all promote a safe society and watch out for one another. I have stood by while a woman loaded her groceries because I saw a man watching her. You don't have to be big or strong to protect and watch out for others. Usually these cowards who attack women and children are looking for an opportunity. Having a witness or even a bystander speaking up can stop them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 08:10 PM
2

This!!! Yes!!! WTH
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 07:12 PM
4

I feel like a pleasant "hello" that you would give to any stranger in passing is fine. You don't owe them any conversation and certainly not hugs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/12/20 06:26 PM
70

Yes, I'm divorced also from an abusive man, but at the very least, he never spoke to me this way. How disrespectful and actually, verbally abusive! I hope the wife in OP is divorcing him asap.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/12/20 06:19 PM
10

So, how much time should I be agreeing to when dating? The pandemic makes it hard to keep too many plans with others, so I'm available a lot. I've been trying to find ways to keep myself busy. Long story short, I swore off dating until after the new year, but this guy with a lot of potential has popped up. I know him well. He asked me on a date. I agreed, and it went well. Now I'm trying to make sure I don't have a pickme relapse. Eek!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/20 06:02 PM
3

I agree about the height and age stuff. Age is important to me, but as long as he's taller than me, I don't care. I think this video was kind of backwards that way. Although, I guess if she had done height and age first, it would have been a short video lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/20 05:51 PM
5

That house gives me anxiety
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/20 05:11 PM
6

Girl, freaking run for your life!! This could be my ex husband and he ended up threatening me with a gun. I would have never thought it would go that far. he usually just got angry when he was drunk and combative towards me verbally. If you need a pep talk, dm me. I just left him earlier this year. He will never change. Choose yourself! It's scary, but it will pay off for you in the end.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/20 05:55 AM
2

Oh, I wasn't saying you were wrong. I've been a sworn police officer before. We trained with someone yelling at us or with a timer or after physical exertion to simulate stress. I remember my dad (retired policeman) told me that he had a friend who was a champion pistol shooter, as in won competitions and stuff, and he completely buckled when he was trying to shoot at someone under combat stress. You never know until you're there. Something that any concealed carry instructor should be training …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/20 04:14 PM
2

I would have burst out crying. Losing a pet is traumatic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/20 03:42 PM
3

Yeah, unless you are a serious martial arts student, taking on a man in physical combat is a no-win. I'm 5'2" and weigh 110. There's no way I'm going to win against a man who is stronger and bigger than me. That's why I carry tools, keep space, and will look for escape routes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/20 02:51 PM
8

...and this is why I always advocate to find a WOMAN concealed carry instructor. They have to really know their stuff because the field is dominated by men. They can also give female specific tips for how to carry.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/20 06:36 AM
13

She's a freaking knockout. Gorgeous!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/20 06:22 AM
29

The best part is that dogs give unconditional love! I have little dogs and they will eff you up if you try to mess with mama. Mine have big voices for such little dogs too. I feel so much safer with them downstairs while I'm sleeping. I know no one is going to be able to sneak in!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/20 06:15 AM
5

The great equalizer and amazingly empowering for women!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/20 06:08 AM
9

Oh yes, I definitely lock my door when I take the trash to the dumpster. Creepers watch for that sort of stuff. Good for you to be proactive and make yourself safe! Crime can happen anywhere
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/20 04:46 AM
20

She did do a good job of verbalizing he was a stranger. Often people are hesitant to get involved in domestic disputes, but if they know he's a stranger, they will help.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/20 12:11 AM
37

Mental illness doesn't excuse dangerous/predatory behavior. It gives a potential explanation, but it doesn't make it "okay". There are MANY people with mental illness who never hurt anyone. Yes, we absolutely need to offer treatment and support for people with mental illness, but they don't get a free pass on dangerous behavior towards others.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/20 12:09 AM
46

That's not like creepy at all /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/20 10:16 PM
143

And people say I'm paranoid for refusing to keep my 2nd story windows open while I sleep in the summer. My father was a policeman for 30+ years. The lengths creepers will go to when breaking into a home are terrifying. My father told me to never sleep with your windows open or unlocked! He also told me to always keep my doors locked even when I'm at home. He also told me to never open the door to an unexpected, unknown visitor. Ladies, you have to look out for yourself. These creeps are looking …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/20 10:15 PM
30

I second this. I made a HUGE mistake of lowering my standards and becoming entangled with a father. I can't even begin to tell you how much money I spent on his kids with no thanks. One prime example of his selfishness: He invited me to go out for a day of bass fishing with him and the kids. He proceeded to leave me with the children while he went off fishing. I ended up entertaining them and babysitting while he had a good time by himself. This was pre-FDS. I should have ran!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/20 07:54 PM
14

Yeah, I agree with this. Phones should be private. I have way too much stuff on there that is meant to be for my eyes only. I keep journal entries, financial information, etc. I think it's such an invasion of privacy for someone to get into my phone. My ex husband did that before I put a fingerprint unlock on my phone. He didn't ask permission or anything, just a controlling, snooping creep
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/20 07:46 PM
43

This blows my mind. How does a medical procedure have anything to do with being a virgin?!! This makes me sick. Why is it okay to do a pelvic exam once you're no longer a virgin?? So if a little girl gets injured or an infection, they can't do a proper exam because somehow that will effect her virginity?? This is a disgusting misogynistic law. It could cost women their lives!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/20 07:43 PM
10

I think they may have meant bipolar, not so much as BPD, but as in two poles - hot and cold relationships. The type of anxious-avoidant rollercoaster relationship that's are addicting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/20 02:29 PM
29

A lesson I learned the hard way: never be with a man who you have to convince to marry you. Just run
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/20 02:21 PM
15

This, 100%
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/20 06:15 AM
59

Me too, sis. I will not flee when someone is being harmed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/20 06:11 AM
12

That actually made me remember something else, I remember the creep saying that he had his daughter put on birth control as soon as she started her period. Again, I can't remember the context, but I remember thinking it was very strange in the moment that he was so insistent about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/20 04:26 AM
110

Why are we teaching people to be afraid of real affection and intimacy?! Sex should be a wonderful, safe, intimate activity. I don't understand this make it a purely mechanical process in pursuit of pleasure. I can get mechanical (and consistent) pleasure from a toy. The whole reason to have a partner is for the intimacy!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 10:42 PM
39

Me too. I love cuddling!! It's just the best.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 10:40 PM
90

-trigger warning, sexual assault- This is SO true. This creep that I worked with said that his daughter prefers boyshort panties. I can't remember what we were all talking about, but I've never known a father that discussed his daughter's undergarments like that. We brushed it off. A few years later he was arrested for molesting and raping his daughter. He had been doing it for years! Freaking monster!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 10:25 PM
6

I would say I agree with most of your list! Thanks for sharing!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 01:55 PM
34

I'm childfree too! Thank goodness! I would be anchored to an abusive creep if I wasn't
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 05:45 AM
11

I need to know more about this list
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 05:38 AM
23

My thoughts exactly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/20 05:36 AM
26

I always feel dramatic insisting on a female doctor, but this just reenforces that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/11/20 10:50 PM
89

Right!! I was thinking about this poor girl experiencing all of this pain and suffering. Meanwhile the boy gets a free pass?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/11/20 02:58 PM
9

Yeah, most wouldn't change, but don't gyms operate on the same model? LOL ...oh and that reminds me, I could hand out fitness routines too. I like the Caesar Milan model: exercise, discipline, affection. It works well for my dogs. 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/11/20 02:45 AM
14

Hmmm, maybe I need to offer a makeover service. Basically charm school for lvm? LOL I see a business venture... A lot of men could level up big time if they would just make some effort. Dress nicely, clean up your look, be polite, work on yourself so you don't bring baggage, etc. I would charge a lot more than $10, btw
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/11/20 02:33 AM
13

I second this!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/11/20 02:29 AM
58

That actually sounds amazing! I'm not sure I want to live with a man again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/11/20 02:11 AM
4

My dad and grandpa always did. In fact, I found out in later years that my grandpa used to do most of the cooking for the big Christmas dinner! I had no idea. He kept it on the down low. We didn't find out until after he passed away. My grandma didn't like cooking. My grandpa was an old school farmer born in the 20s, so not the person I would suspect would be cooking Christmas dinner.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 10:37 PM
9

I cooked a full Thanksgiving meal from scratch for myself 👸 I'm worth it, and let's face it, my cooking is better than anyone else's. I roasted a 12lb turkey and everything! It was actually the best. I busted out the wine and no stress.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 10:24 PM
12

My thoughts exactly lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 04:41 PM
116

My mother was extremely religious and a bully about it. I could have written some of this, including the part about reading the messages. What a terrible invasion of privacy. Still makes me angry. I'm sorry you had to deal with this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 03:16 PM
2

I'm pretty sure he was. I caught him doing some strange stuff and could tell he was up to something. Oh well. Hopefully she figures out he's got problems before he sucks the life out of her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 03:11 PM
6

I'm not great with emotions myself. I'm slowly learning to deal with them in therapy. One thing I've learned is that bottling them up or trying to use crutches (like quickly finding another partner) isn't healthy. It leads to more issues down the road. You end up carrying a big load of baggage. It's much better to experience the emotions and learn from what they are telling you. That doesn't mean you have to be a mess. It means slow down and sit with them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 06:35 AM
22

Unfortunately, they will hurt in the long run. It's sad to see people self destruct like that. Your ex "moving on" isn't a reflection of your worth or anything about you. It's how he feels about himself. From what I've seen/heard it's very common that they move on quickly. Now you have experience and can move forward with this wisdom you've gained. You know what to watch for now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 05:40 AM
5

I'm doing much better. I'm still getting used to actually feeling safe. I feel like I've come a long way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 04:08 AM
13

Eh, I don't think it has much to do with me. I actually feel bad for the woman. He threatened me with a gun and emotionally/verbally abused me for years. I never said anything because I was embarrassed. Not very many people know what he did. I hope she wises up. Ideally he would change and actually be a good person to her, but I suspect that won't happen.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 03:58 AM
4

No man should tell you what to do with YOUR name.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 03:06 AM
11

Why is the guy looking at her phone? Eek! I don't think it's proper to be texting your coworker a play by play about your sex life either. What a trainwreck
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 02:49 AM
95

If it makes you feel better, my ex husband (together almost 10 years), had a girlfriend a month after I left him. Imo, many men can't deal with emotions. They move on quickly so they don't have to actually feel anything. It's a crutch.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 02:27 AM
26

I have a big problem with replying too quickly, to everyone really. This is great advice
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/20 02:24 AM
10

LOL... Just goes to show that they have no idea.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 11:23 PM
12

My mother was such a religious prude that she never talked with me about good boundaries and what standards I should have regarding sex. I was left to figure it out for myself. I wish there had been resources to teach me how to judge if something is right for me and what I want. I'm just now figuring out how to have boundaries. FDS has been such a huge help. I also worry for the teens now. Porn was just becoming a big issue as I was a teenager. It has exploded into a huge problem now, promoting …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 06:39 PM
13

For me, I think the teachering part is setting a boundary. If they don't respect the boundary, bye. She should only have to say once that she doesn't like something and it should be immediately stopped.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 06:31 PM
67

Me too. Good on this mom for protecting her daughter!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 06:25 PM
2

I wouldn't shame a partner for finishing quickly because sometimes it can happen. I would expect him to make effort to do better next time. I would also expect him to make sure I'm satisfied, even if he already finished.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 06:13 PM
3

Right!! I completely understand if that's not someone's thing (I wouldn't want to be with them though), but they better not expect to get a bj. Everyone has a right to say what they are comfortable with, but it's completely selfish to expect oral when you won't reciprocate, imo.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 06:04 PM
72

Most men have no idea what is actually make-up. I've had them comment on my "natural" look that has fully done eyebrows, concealer, and mascara. LOL I've mentioned before about my anti makeup co-worker who forced his girlfriend to stop wearing makeup and then oogled at a rockabilly style done up lady. He's ridiculous. I have a friend who is a makeup artist. She says she wears makeup for herself and to show off to other women because men can't tell the difference between the different lipstick co…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 06:01 PM
11

I had an ex that got pissed when I kept beating him at Soul Caliber II. LOL...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 03:46 AM
9

Yes, this. I kept having relationships with LVM and accepting less because I didn't think I deserved better. I didn't understand now to have standards. I didn't understand that I have inherent worth. FDS has helped give me a framework for all of this. FDS has helped me see that I need to be comfortable taking up space. I've been working hard on myself. I agree with you, above all, we must love ourselves and see ourselves as worthy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 03:43 AM
22

Oh lord, this got me thinking. So the parents bought their kids the gaming consoles, now the "kids" want their wife/gf mommies to buy them their gaming consoles. Gross
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 03:29 AM
9

Yeah, I don't feel safe with headphones in unless I'm actually indoors at work where I know my coworkers will keep me safe. My father is a retired policeman. He always told me that your hearing is just as important as your eyes. When you're out and about, it's important to be aware of your surroundings, especially if you're at a park or walking alone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/20 12:01 AM
5

Yes! This!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 11:56 PM
11

It's so programmed into us. Hearing it over and over is a great reminder!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 11:54 PM
5

Yeah. It's scary out there. You gotta watch out for #1, yourself!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 11:54 PM
13

You're so right about trusting your gut. If you get that instinct that something isn't safe, just lie and say you're in a relationship. For some reason the creepers will respect another man's turf, but won't respect your no. I've worked in the public, out in areas without backup. You've got to trust your instincts. --trigger warning - sexual assault-- There was a woman who was out during the early morning near her work. She was right off a typically busy main street, but it was morning and not m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 11:50 PM
9

The dragon thing made me burst out laughing! I love it! Please make this a film. ...and seriously, where can I find a lvm eating dragon? I need one on my team.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 11:38 PM
29

Omg, I choked on my drink lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 11:31 PM
12

It's so COWARDLY to just disappear like that. If you aren't interested, just say it! Who wants to be with a cowardly man anyway...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 07:31 PM
4

Yet the men still go on there hunting, fishing, buddies trips because they need it. Selfish toads! I think any pushback on you taking time with friends or solo is a huge red flag. He should be supportive because I would definitely support his adventure. I don't understand why men have to make trips miserable. My experience has been that something goes slightly wrong, and I'm feeling irritated, but I keep a lid on it and cope. Meanwhile the manchild throws a tantrum and makes the inconvenience in…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 04:06 PM
7

Solo travel is an amazing confidence booster!! I can't wait to book another trip. Any man that has a problem with it is a no-go. That's some toxic controlling stuff. I had the greatest time when I travelled solo. When I had my LVM ex husband with me, the trips were miserable. He got all moody and ruined everything.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 02:55 PM
65

Everyone is responsible for their own actions. I just cringed as the poor girl desperately tried to cross that river while the stupid young man didn't care that the bridge was gone. I am this girl. I'm going to keep this one in the back of my mind. No crossing rivers for me anymore!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 02:22 PM
3

Love it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 04:51 AM
32

I'm loving my independence now. I recognize I'm not ready for a serious relationship. I feel like I shouldn't be dating unless I'm mentally 100%. It wouldn't be fair to my potential dates. I'm doing therapy, and I think I'm making good progress.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 04:39 AM
25

Spot on as well as what OP said. I think it just goes to show, no matter what they believe, they're still scotes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 04:34 AM
6

I feel this one
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/20 04:30 AM
3

Apparently I need to print this out and read it daily
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 08:30 PM
6

Absolutely! I have a friend who loves Scotch. Her husband isn't allowed into her Scotch cabinet unless she offers him some because it's her's. He often gives her special bottles of Scotch as gifts, with no expectation of getting any.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 07:47 PM
16

It just shows how disrespectful they are being! Your comment about the chocolate reminded me how he would help himself to things that I told him I made/bought for myself. He would drain all of my tequila that I bought to make margaritas, so whenever I actually wanted one, there wasn't any left for me. Ughhhh!! Why did I put up with that? Ladies, if he doesn't respect your chocolate/wine/whatever stash, get rid of him! There's no excuse to have absolutely no self control like that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 05:23 PM
6

I actually have never thought of doing that! That could have saved me all sorts of heartache!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 04:00 PM
32

Yes! I'm amazed at how my grocery bill is reasonable now that it's just me. My fat pig of an ex husband used to gobble up all the food, so I had to work harder making more meals. He ate ridiculous amounts. I tried to make extra to have leftovers so I could have a night off, nope, he gobbled that too. Then he complained that he gained weight. Disgusting man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 03:43 PM
25

I stayed for 9 years. You did the best you could with the information you had at the time. This isn't easy stuff. Be kind to yourself. Speak to yourself as you would a dear friend. Ditch that negative self talk.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 03:36 PM
11

It wasn't your fault. Nothing gives another person the right to do that to you. There is nothing you could do to make it your fault.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 03:34 PM
10

I just don't understand how people make it through life not being able to properly cook.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 02:59 PM
22

Keep learning! Cooking is actually less expensive than ordering take out. You just have to get some experience. There are lots of blogs out there that explain step by step. Don't be afraid to make mistakes, that's how you learn! Budget bytes is a good blog for simple, tasty, inexpensive recipes for beginners, btw.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 02:54 PM
21

She was just a child who loved her father. It's tragic. So young and already feeling she has to caretake.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 02:51 PM
17

Growing up, my mom wanted to teach me to cook. I always refused because I saw it as "girl stuff" and I was a tomboy. Once I got into college and was on my own, I discovered that I did indeed enjoy eating good food. I quickly began to teach myself to cook. I still kick myself for having resisted my mom's offers of teaching all those years! I can't imagine how anyone makes it through life with no cooking skills. My food tastes better than restaurants! It's a dangerous skill to have because all the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 02:48 PM
7

Absolutely! You're so right about the lying. It's a stupid thing to lie about and for me, it wouldn't have even mattered. Yeah, everyone is allowed to have their preferences.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 05:31 AM
6

Right! I think they're onto something
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 04:02 AM
14

I've heard men say that too. As long as he's taller than my 5'2", I don't care. I don't get the 6ft thing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 03:52 AM
5

Yes. I'm doing a lot better now that I'm single and not dating atm. I need to learn to set proper boundaries and find what I actually like first.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 03:36 AM
44

How dare women wear athletic wear to do athletic things! /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/20 02:47 AM
57

I absolutely love dogs. I wouldn't have the heart to push them away... Even for science.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 10:31 PM
3

That's a good idea. I'm taking a break from dating now. I'm trying to make note of red flags and how to spot them. I'm also trying to make a mental "rule book" of my standards and how I expect people to treat me
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 06:02 AM
3

This stuff is fairly common and stuff I've experienced too. I don't know why people make such a big deal out of therapy. You're literally paying someone to listen to you and help you process. It's like having a friend you can be selfish and talk about yourself with. It's also a safe space because the therapist, unlike a "friend", is legally bound to keep your information private. I wish I had done therapy a long time ago! It's so helpful to have someone who isn't involved in the mess to help gui…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 06:00 AM
6

Sounds like my ex. He refuses to extricate himself from his ex wife. They have no children together. Some day he will wise up, maybe, but I wasn't about to wait around for that nonsense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 05:37 AM
12

Oh good lord. I don't want to event think about the money I've shredded on stupid men. Never again!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 04:55 AM
33

Yup. Basically summed everything up
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 04:31 AM
2

The picture is hilarious, but he's definitely telling on himself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 04:30 AM
73

Incel... LOL... I guarantee I could have a man in my bed within the hour if I so choose! Hahaha
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 04:17 AM
7

Same
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 04:36 AM
20

I'm also guessing she's just dead tired of him and doesn't want to deal with his horrible sex
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 04:22 AM
26

Reminds me of those girls singing that song, "don't be polite to men who creep you out"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 04:16 AM
22

Same!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 04:07 AM
49

I can attest to that!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 07:49 PM
92

I'm more interested in adopting a pound puppy because at least that sweet dog will love you with all it's heart. LVM on the other hand.... gross.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 07:48 PM
17

Exactly it. I would have dodged a lot of heartbreak if I had listened when the guy told on himself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 07:42 PM
46

No one else is responsible for your emotional/mental health. You are responsible for you. It is the responsibility of both parents to nurture and teach children, not just the mother. As others have said, pay a therapist. Therapists are professionals and will actually be able to help you get to a healthy state. It's insane to expect women to fix men. I agree that boys are often brushed aside in general when dealing with emotions, but that's a society issue, not a women issue. Often men are perpet…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 07:40 PM
31

I only send hearts to my family or lady friends
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 05:35 PM
80

Yessss! This! Just got out of a relationship where I was 24 when I met him he was 33. He manipulated and took advantage of my naivety.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 05:34 PM
19

One has to wonder why they are so upset about women having high standards for dating...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 03:13 PM
39

That last quip has me dying! Love it
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/20 05:39 AM
53

It's so much easier to see when you're not in the thick of things. This has happened to me too. I'm glad you and your baby are safe now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 10:00 PM
24

If he's acting like this at the engagement stage, imagine what he would have done to you once you were stuck in a marriage! Your acne is temporary. His ugly soul is permanent.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 09:54 PM
7

Yuck!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 07:00 PM
61

I was thinking the same. Why on earth would you drink THAT knowing the effects it will likely have?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 04:07 PM
22

Thank you for sharing your experience. I've been making a mental list of red flags to watch for, but I'm not great at spotting them yet. When I can hear about what other women have experienced, it really helps!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 05:16 AM
11

Oh, he wants your attention, otherwise, why keep hanging around. Shoo fly! You don't have time for his dumb mind games. You don't owe him anything. You don't need to be anything other than professional with him. I find excusing myself to go to the ladies room, where the oaf can't follow, is a good tactic to get rid of an unwanted conversation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 04:20 AM
9

They will live unfulfilled, cowardly lives. When they are on their death bed and feel hollow, they will understand the mistakes they have made.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 04:16 AM
11

If you really want to get him, ice him out. He obviously wants your attention. Block and delete! That's why I love fds, it works. Keep your work interactions to only work and pretend like he is invisible otherwise. If he tries to bring up anything personal, just tell him you want to keep this relationship professional and work related.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 04:14 AM
10

I think they are afraid of the emotional connection. Better to run back to what is familiar, and they know they aren't vulnerable to actually having real intimacy with
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 04:09 AM
13

Stupid man. He obviously has troubles within him and can't recognize something real and good. He would rather stay detached and fearful. It's sad, but it's not your responsibility. You deserve someone who is whole now and ready for you now. You deserve someone who is courageous, not a coward. Too often we gloss over actual cowardly behavior. Cowards will: -push someone away passive aggressively in order to avoid a real conversation where they speak their truth. (He should have just said he chang…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 04:02 AM
13

Same, girl. I can't even begin to tell you, all the cuddling, the late nights, the way he looked at me, and then BAM, he just up and decided I wasn't anything to him. He said he is "emotionally unavailable". My heart is still broken. I feel foolish too, but they do things to keep you going along. They aren't honest. They manipulate. Maybe there was a connection and that scared him off. So many people are terrified of a real intimate relationship anymore. You deserve someone who wants intimacy an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 03:48 AM
21

I made a mistake and had a relationship with a co-worker. I'm in sort of the same position. This happened pre-FDS , but I'm still healing from it. You're not alone. I'm certainly not stupid. I have a STEM degree. This stuff is really difficult when men manipulate and you get emotions involved. It's easy to make mistakes. Try not to be so hard on yourself. You're learning. It really sucks that you have to go through this. I think people who have kind souls are often sucked in this way. Sometimes …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 03:38 AM
14

I just trust that the world will get them sooner or later. You can't go around putting out bad and not have it come back to you eventually.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 03:20 AM
45

Sweet Jesus! Someone stop this wedding!!! My parents were very strict and I married a manchild who was a year older than me when I was 21 and that was WAY too young. I believe it also damaged me, but that's a whole different trauma story. That is some pedophile stuff to even be courting her at 16. How can her parents allow this?! I wish I could talk to her. She has so much potential right now. She could be anything! Don't give it away for some creepy man who is chasing after teenagers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 03:15 AM
44

My NVM ex husband used to pull stuff like this. Make Thanksgiving for my family... Uhm no. Last year I left the country at Thanksgiving instead of being The Hostess ™️. I had the time of my life on my solo trip and it became very clear that I didn't need his dusty ass holding me back anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 01:53 AM
13

Attractive, well spoken, and good content to what he was saying. Wow! Where can I find someone like him?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 01:48 AM
12

I've had that same experience. He always preached that no man can be trusted...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 01:47 AM
117

I wish I had heard this as a teenager. I was told I was intimidating, so I made myself smaller to be accepted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 06:55 PM
19

Yep. This!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 06:10 PM
10

I was wondering if any women actually liked it. I had a man tell me about his "friend's wife" that liked it, but I wasn't sure he was being truthful. I've never found a woman that actually likes it. Thank you for sharing your perspective.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 05:59 PM
30

I had a similar experience. I wish I could slap 24 year old me sometimes. I'm much wiser now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 05:09 PM
26

Me too!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 05:06 PM
100

But it does show the progress you've made! I read a journal entry I made a few years ago and just cringed. We're all growing and moving beyond being a pickme.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 04:41 PM
12

Men will sexualize a woman no matter what she wears. You can't control this. Wear whatever you want because they will be looking anyway! Seriously, I had to wear men's cut BDU pants and a ridiculous red polo for my security officer uniform. The men (and women actually) made so many sexual comments about me in this ill-fitting ridiculous get up with freaking combat boots. You can't get much more covered up/not feminine/ugly than that. Yuck.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 05:44 AM
7

Ugh. That must have been painful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 05:37 AM
6

Thanks for posting! I'm actually speechless. My blood is boiling because it reminds me of my nvm ex husband. He was a worthless drunk and would lash out like that. This is such an accurate representation of what LVM/NVM do. They try to destroy the spark in women. I'm going to save this one just to remind myself. I hope she left his sorry ass. What a piece of trash.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 04:54 PM
3

What's the deal with the plant room dude?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 03:52 PM
5

This. Right here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 03:31 PM
9

Yeah, I'm not a fan of overly big dicks
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 03:22 PM
3

Have you tried the discs at all? There's a reusable one called Nixit. It doesn't use suction. I'm thinking about trying it ... For science! I've used the disposable discs when they first came out, and they worked really well, but I didn't want to keep having to toss them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 01:55 AM
17

That's because women will respect your life choices
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 11:21 PM
8

Good advice! I managed to replace a taillight housing and the melted taillight bulb, in the Walmart parking lot no less lol, on my old car before I sold it. I want to learn the oil change process. I like to do outdoors stuff where I'm often in remote areas, so knowing how to fix stuff on the fly would be such a stress reliever! Another skill set I want to aquire is more outdoor survival skills. I'm ready to level up my independence this next year. I've tried to rely on LVMs too long. I always th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 11:18 PM
7

Love this! Definitely goals for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 11:08 PM
28

Glad you're safe now
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 10:50 PM
15

I'm dying! Honestly though, I don't know many men that could manage macaroni art even... LOL
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 10:43 PM
27

Slowly learning! I have a mechanical aptitude, so I know I can do it. I also ended up buying myself a newer car that doesn't have issues. It was more important for the family budget to go towards his giant, expensive truck than to make sure I had a reliable car.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 09:42 PM
9

Since we're on the topic, try a menstrual cup! My cramps have gotten much better since I started using one. It was a huge learning curve. I got super frustrated and quit trying for a whole year. Then I watched some YouTube videos and learned how to get it inserted properly. There's also a learning curve with removing and emptying, but once you've got it down, no problem. I use Lena cup and knix period panties. It's SOOOO much better! I can practically forget that I'm on my period. I do some pret…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 07:32 PM
27

Same, girl.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 07:26 PM
13

Hilarious! I'm dying!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 07:15 PM
165

I had an issue with my old car and needed to replace a part. I wanted to learn how to do it myself because it's a skill set I want. My ex husband took over and wouldn't teach me anything. He even admitted it was because he didn't want me to learn because then I "wouldn't need him anymore". Guess who never needed him in the first place and who's single now?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 07:09 PM
13

I didn't realize they had such an age difference until I saw this. Both of those people had their demons. It's terribly sad. I do think though, when men say that it isn't natural for a man to just want one women his whole life, Camilla and Charles are a good example of that. Charles seems to have wanted nothing but Camilla! Poor Diana was way too young to get sucked into that mess.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 05:19 PM
30

Yes! Friendship is definitely a two way road. It's not one person sucking the life out of you and skipping away.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 05:00 PM
37

She's beautiful and should be demanding more. She seems like she has a fun personality. She should come over here and level up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 04:50 PM
16

Same. It seems condescending a lot of the time too
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 04:45 PM
10

I think I just threw up a little
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 04:43 PM
14

Yesss! Why do you need to have sex with a bunch of people to be fulfilled? You can be friends and not have sexual relations with people. Romance should be between a couple. I have another one: another acquaintance decided to cheat on his wife with a woman who was in an open marriage. The open marriage wife decided she wanted cheater man more than her husband. Cheater man came to his senses and decided to run back to his wife. At least he was honest with his wife and they went to counseling. Open…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 04:41 PM
9

You're right. I have a male acquaintance that had an open "relationship" with his wife. She moved her boyfriend into their home with their two children. Then the boyfriend didn't work, so the acquaintance supported them all!! Then she decided she didn't want the acquaintance husband anymore. She divorced him. The open relationship thing is a mess.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 04:13 PM
27

Yes. I live on the west coast and that seems to be rampant here. I don't understand it. This wasn't a thing when I was in university. It's confusing and bizarre. A lot of women here are okay with polyamorous and other types of "open" relationships. Everyone is terrified of actually being vulnerable and intimate.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 02:57 PM
28

This seems to be what attracts the creeps to me. All they want to do is possess and destroy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 02:20 PM
2

So true!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 02:17 PM
36

For some reason, in the area I live, polyamorous and "open" relationships are a big thing right now. Where I live, it isn't just men going for it, but they seem to be all about it. It seems like just a bunch of damaged people. When you bring extra partners into a relationship, there's triangulation and also keeping a partner from having intimacy by holding them at arm's length.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 02:02 PM
5

Reminds me of a time I went to go look at a puppy at some backyard breeder's house. She opened her front door and a scraggly chicken ran out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 06:47 AM
25

Mine too
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 06:31 AM
24

Right!! I'm feeling the rage bubble right now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 06:29 AM
34

I'm an amazing home cook, if I do say so myself. I've brought things into work and people have raved. I'm very confident in my cooking skills. That being said, I think you're really onto something. Men who are focused on cooking are telling you they want a caretaker-mommy. It's fine to have a preference. Why wouldn't you want a partner who can cook? I would love that! When they make a point of commenting on it and discussing it, that's the flag, imo.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 06:26 AM
23

Creeptastic
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 06:20 AM
9

Yet they spent money on a photographer probably?? Truck men, bleh. Really any man that fusses over their vehicle. Boring
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 06:19 AM
13

Maybe he says it like Mike Tyson?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 06:14 AM
17

This explains a lot. I usually just block them. I had some creeper that is friends with my lady coworker request me. I denied him. Then he started trying to contact me on instagram. He's at least 15 years older than me, and I look young for my age. Yuck.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 06:11 AM
234

What is with all these trash guys thinking they can just go around with not defining relationships and putting their dicks in everything? Why is there such a fear of intimacy in so many people?? All of this multiple partners stuff is just a person who is scared to death of real intimacy. They try to say we aren't meant to be in exclusive relationships, but really they are emotionally stunted. Gross.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 06:05 AM
4

My ex husband was a big duck hunter. He would leave most of the day every weekend during duck season. He left me with all of the household chores and spent lots of money on his hobby. What did I get? Nothing. No money spent on me or my hobbies. I got to be his maid. I stopped cleaning after a while and nothing got done.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/20 06:11 AM
10

Gross.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/20 06:01 AM
68

I haven't done OLD yet, but as soon as I became single, all of these sub par acquaintances I have on fb started messaging me. I'm fit and fairly attractive. These guys are like 4s. It's obnoxious. I don't understand how they can think they possibly have a chance. These are people who are high school friends or former co-workers that I've known for several years and never shown a bit of interest in before.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/20 05:55 AM
20

I've made mistakes too. Mistakes aren't wasted as long and you learn and try your best. Be a friend to yourself. What would you say if your friend told you these things about herself? We're all learning and growing. I'm trying to forgive my mistakes. It's definitely not easy. Be kind to yourself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/20 05:44 AM
12

My ex husband always agreed with me when I told him I desperately wanted to get a small dog. Once we moved in together and I had space for a dog, guess who was all controlling and negative about getting a dog? I think you are so self aware and actually kind to realize that you don't want that. It's cruel to agree with someone and then hold them back from what they want. Happy ending: guess who's free now with two small dogs? :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 09:10 PM
9

That's exactly what happened to me. I wish I had heard this 10 years ago as a naive 24 year old meeting my ex who was 33.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 06:43 PM
14

It means don't worry about what is going on in his head, freaking run!! Run as fast as you can and don't look back.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 06:40 PM
20

Thank you for breaking this down. I'm still learning how to spot stuff like this. This is very helpful!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 02:57 AM
2

This. Yes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 02:49 AM
3

That didn't occur to me. I suspect he has some real problems and should have never been in any relationships to begin with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 02:48 AM
3

This may not be popular, but I don't think it's okay for her to take his possession away like he's a child. It's perfectly within her rights to be upset by his behavior, but she shouldn't be withholding his property from him. That's wrong. Can you imagine if it were a man withholding something from a woman? That just doesn't set right with me. That being said, she should just leave him. If he doesn't want to go to therapy, that isn't her responsibility. She can decide what she's willing to live …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 02:46 AM
18

Same. Ugh! Lots of fakers that pretend to be "modern men", but watch porn and are lazy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 02:37 AM
3

What is up with that?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 02:36 AM
7

I love it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 02:30 AM
7

I will check it out! Thanks!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 02:25 AM
2

Everyone else has said it, but run! This is the exact situation with my ex husband. He said the same and turned out to be a worthless abuser.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 02:20 AM
29

Any man who messages me and says any derivative of "hey beautiful" gets blocked! Gross
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/11/20 02:15 AM
2

I have little dogs. They'll alert me, and I'll take care of business. There are a lot of women that will teach for free if you just ask. Try looking for local groups or find a woman who hunts. Some fun shops may be able to point you towards a female instructor. It's just good to have the knowledge even if you can't afford a gun. You can get used pistols for just a couple hundred dollars, and they keep their resale value.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 04:40 PM
7

Thanks!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 02:50 PM
5

What's her IG name? I couldn't find her
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 02:37 PM
9

Fascinating and disturbing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 02:10 PM
35

So true! My ex husband dropped the ring on the coffee table when he brought me a cup of coffee in the morning. It was horrible. I should have just said no. It didn't get any better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 01:56 PM
38

Reminds me of the fish holding pictures. I'm not one to rain on someone's parade. I think people should do what brings them joy. Why do we need to drag women down for liking "pumpkin spice" or dying their hair?! Even if I really thought something was stupid, I would never purposefully hurt someone's feelings for liking something wholesome like fall leaves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 03:59 AM
64

That's why the term "basic" really bothers me. People throw it around as a way to insult women if they enjoy a popular thing. I've noticed a lot of people are very insulting now if I mention I like autumn. I had someone call one of my social media posts basic because it was a selfie with beautiful fall leaves in the background. It's obnoxious.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 03:51 AM
27

This is amazing. I sent it to all of my ladies and we are all dying laughing!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 03:36 AM
21

Me too!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 03:19 AM
142

This is something I've come to realize lately. What a joke that they keep playing us off one another. As women, we need to support one another!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 12:53 AM
2

Heck yeah!! I can't believe I didn't see what I giant p.o.s. Robert is in that story. I was just shocked when I rewatched it. Oh, how my eyes are open now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 12:13 AM
7

Being a woman in a STEM field profession is frustrating. I've also done police work. Both are "boys clubs". It's ridiculous.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 12:11 AM
62

Saved this one. I need to keep reminding myself. I chased so hard after this man who wanted this casual/fwb nonsense. I've learned my lesson. Big thanks to FDS for all of the reinforcement!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 09:56 PM
32

Same!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 09:53 PM
9

Elizabeth. I rewatched this recently and she goes from being a pickme to a freaking queen. I am embarrassed to say that I felt bad for Robert at the end of that movie when I previously saw it. I was so sad they couldn't be together, and I completely missed the message. Upon rewatching it this weekend, I was ready to stand up and cheer at the ending!! Heck yes! It may not be historically accurate, but this movie is very entertaining.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 07:45 PM
6

Most definitely!! I think about Elinor cautioning Marianne from sharing so much with Willoughby when they didn't know much about him yet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 07:43 PM
2

Imo, changing what we want to wear to control another person's opinion of us is a bad road to go down. It reminds me of that old excuse that a woman deserved to be raped because of what she was wearing. Women should be able to wear whatever they want! I have a friend who got negged by a male because she wore these cute volleyball shorts for hiking on a hot day. It was infuriating. He said his wife said she was showing off her butt. No, my friend was trying to do athletic activity comfortably.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 05:58 PM
27

I noticed this too. You're absolutely right! That's disgusting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 05:49 PM
6

Thank you!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 05:39 PM
5

Wear whatever you want! I used to worry that guy's would check me out and stuff if I wore leggings. Then I came to realize, it's not my job to control how these creeps think. If it's comfortable and it makes me feel good, I'm going to wear it. I sincerely believe that creepers are going to creep no matter what I wear!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 05:38 PM
5

What's MGTOW?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 05:30 PM
135

"I have no life, so I need to focus on people I don't agree with"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 03:08 PM
52

So true. It's terrible what society does to little boys.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 03:03 PM
3

Kinda wondering... He said that stuff the first week we were dating. Ugh. I was naive. He took major advantage of my young age and inexperience. I was 24 and he was 33.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 02:59 PM
2

Yesss!! Me too. He said all his exes were crazy. He even said his last one said he emotionally abused her. I couldn't believe it. I'm definitely wiser now. Thanks, FDS!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 02:45 PM
2

Same!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/20 04:22 AM
6

Oh yes! I've had this experience twice. Both times I thought something was wrong with me. Nope. I was just with selfish, abusive assholes! Both of these guys pressured me at the end when sex just became this horrible chore. I thought I didn't like it. Nope. I just couldn't stand being around them and my body knew before my brain did.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/20 04:09 AM
8

Interesting that you point that out. I have experienced that. I found his scent repulsive. I had never had trouble with it before.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/20 04:05 AM
9

Ugh, I have done that before and it's terrible. Worst feeling ever. Never again!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/20 04:04 AM
9

I need to feel connection to my partner's body I need to like his natural scent (on a clean body, not some oily, gross, unshowered mess) I need emotional connection I need trust and to feel cared about I need his penis to be a good size for me. I'm very petite. I don't like having a uncomfortably big penis in me. I need to feel desirable. My last partner told me that my vagina smelled and tasted great. I need him to listen to me and tell me what he wants too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/20 03:54 AM
5

I wish I had this sub as a teenager! Good for you, girl!! Put yourself first. Invest in yourself. I wish someone had told me those things when I was your age.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/20 03:41 AM
2

I was married to a man who is 9 years older, and it wasn't great. He was immature. I was his barb the builder. He couldn't relate to a lot of the memories I had of growing up. I'm never dating someone who's that much older again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/20 03:31 AM
97

He's trying to control what she wears He's JEALOUS He's lying Bing, bang, boom, toss out the trash, girl!! That's heading into abusive behavior territory.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/20 03:03 AM
1

Get this lady over here! This is enraging. What is wrong with people?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 11:50 PM
2

Divorce. His. Ass. Now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 11:44 PM
11

I've only had sex with 3 men and I'm 34. Until this last partner, I always felt inexperienced and naive. Sex isn't that complicated. The only thing that takes time is finding out what works for you. What I wish someone had told me is: don't have sex unless you really want to. It's sooo much better when your body wants to do it. I married young and had absolutely horrible sex with the first two partners. It was boring and mechanical. I realize now it was because I liked them emotionally, but my b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 09:48 PM
12

Love this!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 08:34 PM
14

Hobosexual! I love this!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 08:28 PM
3

Uhh yeah. This. He needs to get his life in order. Those are excuses. He shouldn't be dating if he can't extricate himself from his ex yet. He's enjoying all the benefits of a relationship with her except sex (?maybe?). Very bad boundaries. I wouldn't mess with that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 06:57 PM
15

Rise! I love this!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 03:33 PM
22

This hanging out with the ex thing is so toxic and gross. He's just keeping her as a back burner option and she's pickme-ing right along. Disgusting! He just wants to keep controlling her and having influence. Gross, gross, gross!! Unacceptable!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 03:32 PM
32

That was like my last partner. He was amazing in bed. Always asking for tips and patient. Our bodies had an amazing connection. I'm never accepting less again. I also enjoyed giving him BJs. They got me aroused. That was how sex is supposed to be. I wish he could straighten out the rest of his life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 03:23 PM
35

My massage therapist is a man, and he never makes me feel uncomfortable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 03:13 PM
3

It came out slowly over the years. There were little things that should have tipped me off, but I always rationalized them. He did lots of controlling things that I didn't recognize for what they were in the moment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/20 02:12 PM
13

It depends on your skin and stuff. You can also clean up without having a full blown shower with hair washing. Everyone's body chemistry is different. Stinking or having gross skin isn't acceptable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/20 11:13 PM
7

Why should she have to ask him to actually take care of his bodily hygiene? Not the mama. Next!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/20 11:09 PM
39

Does anyone else find it highly disturbing that he's basically equating living with his girlfriend with living with his parents? It seems like he's calling his ex his mommy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/20 11:06 PM
39

Agreed! My ex husband used to talk about how all his other girlfriends were "crazy". He even told me how one said he was abusive! How could this possibly be true? He seems so nice! It took 9 years, but his abusive side slowly came out. It was very subtle at first and ended up with my life being threatened. They don't change. I wish I had listened to him when he outed himself as an abuser.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/20 11:03 PM
4

Love this!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/20 03:16 AM
15

This is perfect
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/20 02:17 PM
18

They just want to have some sort of influence and control over your body. Disgusting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/20 06:17 AM
64

I remember having a conversation with a male co-worker about how he convinced his gf not to wear makeup anymore. Then I overheard him talking to another male co-worker about how hot this girl (not his gf) was with her rockabilly style. He specifically said she was wearing a lot of makeup. Gross.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/20 06:12 AM
12

The stinger model by streamlight is a good one. You can also get taser/flashlight combo lights. My dad bought one for me. The arc on that thing alone is enough to get someone's attention. Look at the lumen rating on the flashlight. The more lumens, the brighter. You can get some inexpensive high lumen flashlights on amazon. Also, remember you need to have this stuff readily accessable. No purse purgatory. It needs to be in your pocket or in your hand or somewhere you can get to it quickly. Too m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/20 05:28 AM
37

I've got a .380 my dad gave me and a 9mm Glock 43. My Glock is my go-to. I'm petite, so concealing can be a challenge. I've had my eye on a smaller Kimber .380, but expensive! If you're not familiar with guns, find a woman instructor and learn everything you can from her. I don't worry at all when I'm out hiking. I stay alert for threats, and I'm ready. Solo hiking is so empowering! I also carry when I go out on walks around town solo. For around town, there are also some other less lethel self …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/20 04:03 AM
12

I put so much time and effort into my ex husband's kids. I was extremely foolish. I paid for all sorts of things because their LVM father couldn't afford anything. I did all of the thoughtful things like picking out gifts and taking his daughter to get feminine products when she first started her period. The thanks I got was being treated like absolute garbage. I will never date a man with children again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/20 03:44 AM
34

This is why I'm well armed. Guns are a great equalizer. It's so empowering too. I go hiking by myself and do all sorts of stuff solo.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/20 03:33 AM
6

I thought I was the only one that hates them 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/20 03:15 AM
19

Everyone has bad an good in them. We all have stuff to work on. Good for you for recognizing it and taking action!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/20 10:09 PM
7

What utter nonsense! LOL
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/20 09:50 PM
10

This actually made me choke on drink.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/20 09:48 PM
55

They're probably all ugly to him
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/20 03:39 AM
8

Love it! I've never seen it before
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/20 04:21 AM
5

I'm an excellent cook, and I also have worked in restaurants. I take cleanliness seriously! I don't trust other people's cooking. I remember going to my ex MIL's Thanksgiving and being sorely disappointed. Of course I didn't say anything, but I told my mother about it and called it "bad giving". I guess we were spoiled by good cooks in my family! Bad giving was some of the worst food I've had. I remember making some food for my ex and his siblings. His sister said my food was like eating at a re…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/20 12:48 AM
21

I'm with you on the no military thing. My ex husband is a veteran. He's an angry, alcoholic man-child. Never again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/20 12:39 AM
3

I wish someone had given me this advice!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/20 12:36 AM
5

I would have been atomically pissed. Good food takes preparation and time. Hosting people properly takes time and planning. If I had to throw something sloppy together and have that reflect on my abilities, ohhh I would be sooo angry. Screw that guy
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/20 12:32 AM
4

At least she says it's just physical /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/20 12:22 AM
6

That's hilarious. You definitely dodged some bullets. I can't believe these people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/20 11:23 PM
20

Cheeto man had a list of requirements?! I'm dying!! Do you remember any of the requirements? Those are hilarious stories. What did mister 42 say when he was caught?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/20 11:11 PM
28

I need more information on this... Was he like trying to be sexy or was he a hobgoblin cheeto monster? What was he wearing? What did you say?! Did he acknowledge the cheetos??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/20 10:58 PM
30

This actually made me laugh out loud at work. I can picture the phone flinging!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/20 10:52 PM
20

My thoughts exactly... Omg
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/20 10:50 PM
21

Everyone grieves differently. Another thing to consider is that in your circumstance, I suspect you did a lot of grieving for him along the way. I'm sorry for your loss.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/20 10:38 PM
28

After I had to put my beloved dog to sleep, I was so broken and hurt. My chest felt tight and I was barely breathing. On the car ride home, my ex husband was already wanting another dog. He also said he felt angry. Grief is different for different people. I know my ex loved that dog dearly. I think the moving on to the next thing doesn't mean he didn't love her, it's because most men aren't as good at sorting through their emotions. I think he was trying to find someone to use as a crutch throug…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/20 10:36 PM
17

I'm a lady that works in a STEM field too. I looove this! Thanks for sharing!! Great idea
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/20 10:24 PM
153

Why is she paying for these guys on HER birthday?! Did I miss something??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/20 04:49 AM
21

Which explains that 3% norwegian in my DNA... LOL
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/20 02:15 AM
9

Hmmm, so did mine ...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/20 02:10 AM
8

While this is true, I'm impressed because I haven't personally found many men with empathy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/20 01:10 AM
15

It seems like immigration and family law stuff would be THE WORST. Emotional labor for sure. That's why I'm a scientist.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/20 03:58 PM
8

They make me uncomfortable too. I'm definitely not going to spend time saying mean things about pregnant women. I think the reason it makes me uncomfortable is because my mom used to always talk about how sick she was when she was pregnant and how horrible it was. She was then surprised pikachu face when I decided not to have children.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/20 03:40 PM
25

It will definitely save time and money to speak with an expert. Immigration stuff is such a mess.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/20 03:29 PM
108

Same. I'm in WAY better shape. I'm actually 70 lbs lighter. 28 year old me had given up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/20 03:20 PM
7

After speaking with several women, I think men's mental health is at an all time low because of COVID. The men have no coping skills and are turning to alcohol/drugs/porn. I have several friends who have husbands that are basically alcoholics now since covid started. I left an alcoholic at the beginning of covid. It's out of control. Many women are trying to handle their mentally fragile man-child behind closed doors and hiding their partner's addiction issues. While I think the slogan is ridicu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/20 02:47 PM
42

I imagine if he's a motorcycle rider, perhaps he's been in a similar situation himself. This could also empathy, which is amazing! Impressive stuff.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/20 02:39 PM
1

That's a lot of posts!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/20 05:52 AM
8

Oh dear. I had no idea about these people. I generally don't follow stuff like this. I'll have to look up information on them. It would be nice to have a list that explains why these guys are anti woman or have quotes or something. I'm quite curious now
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/20 12:44 AM
83

Yes!! I remember arguing with a man that said he felt bad when solo women who were out walking would cross the street to be on the other side away from him. He took it personally. I pointed out that a woman walking by herself often has to do this to be safe. If the man crosses to be on the same side as the woman, that immediately tells her that he probably has bad intentions. He couldn't get past the fact that it hurt his little feelings. Nevermind the women that have to do this because we're sm…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 10:57 PM
35

This makes me hopping angry!! How inappropriate for any adult to be speaking to a child that way. If the teacher was truly concerned, s/he should have contacted your parents privately. Schools treat girls with no respect.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 10:47 PM
17

While that makes it slightly better, I still think it's terrible to fixate about virginity and pressure you like that. I'm glad you're rid of him now!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 09:55 PM
12

Your feelings are valid. I'm sure it isn't just the act that bothered you. You consider speaking with a therapist about it, so you can heal. I recently started seeing a therapist, and it sounds very dramatic, but we just have conversations about my life. I like being able to talk with her because I know she can't share my information with anyone else. It feels safe. One thing I have learned from her is that it's okay to feel how I feel about things. Try to think about what you would tell a dear …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 07:27 PM
50

I'm terribly sorry you had to deal with any of that. The guy you dated was a subhuman to even suggest that to you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 07:21 PM
7

Yikes! It sounds like you were way underweight. I'm a fit 5'2" and I'm 115 lbs. You couldn't have had one bit of "fat" at that weight. I'm so glad you're healthy now! Weight is just a number, what matters is how you feel and being healthy. I'm sorry you had to deal with such a cruel jerk!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/20 11:53 PM
3

I've been with him, and he broke my heart.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/20 11:39 PM
2

Yeah, because if he's willing to push the dog's boundaries, imagine what he will do to you! Scary stuff
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/20 08:05 PM
3

This is a good, responsible thing. Very refreshing to hear! I shouldn't be surprised in this sub. You're a good mom to both.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/20 08:01 PM
9

I suspect you're right about that. Gross indeed!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/20 07:52 PM
73

Right! How is getting drinks any more risky than eating food. The only risk is that he may have to spend more money and his pp might not get attention. Gross
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/20 03:31 PM
14

I find it very helpful. I'm still developing the ability to spot red flags, so being able to read about other experiences is quite helpful!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/20 03:04 PM
30

Apparently I have been a Barb the builder. At least I did the leaving this last time. Very thankful for this community. I'm working hard on myself now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/20 03:01 PM
6

Sometimes I can recognize the red flags, but I'm not very good at translating them. This was very helpful!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/20 05:33 PM
5

I don't get it either. Why is everyone so afraid to be intimate?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/20 05:30 PM
18

This!! Why have an actual human encounter when you can watch something and skip all of the actual intimacy? /s Sex is amazing. It's insane to me that people want to zone out and watch videos when you can actually be touching a real person. It's so disconnected and strange.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/20 05:12 PM
72

Exactly. If he's picturing her, then he doesn't need the visual stimulation of another woman. Insanity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/20 05:07 PM
3

Okay, so I'm naive. What is cuckold porn? I'm afraid to Google it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/20 04:57 PM
2

Dying!! LOL
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/20 04:40 PM
1

This. It's not difficult to look tidy. If he honestly doesn't know what to do, ask a well kempt friend or find a life coach or ask online. Curly hair can be difficult to manage, but there is a lot of info out there about how to make it look nice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/20 04:38 PM
1

This is much appreciated. I have found that I'm woefully unequipped to deal with dating. All of these tips and perspectives are very appreciated!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/20 04:30 PM
62

Really any little thing can. I always get irritated by condoms. I hate them. I'm latex sensitive too. I think I'm just meant to be a nun.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/20 02:23 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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