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I_am_a_neophyte Archive

View 8 posts and 52 comments by I_am_a_neophyte on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
89

Success StoriesI_am_a_neophyte/r/Divorce_Men25/07/26 02:33 AM
38

RantI_am_a_neophyte/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 03:35 PM
32

Dealing with the Ex / STBXI_am_a_neophyte/r/Divorce_Men18/03/26 11:01 PM
31

Getting StartedI_am_a_neophyte/r/Divorce_Men19/01/26 02:33 AM
19

Dealing with the Ex / STBXI_am_a_neophyte/r/Divorce_Men07/02/26 07:03 PM
13

Dealing with the Ex / STBXI_am_a_neophyte/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 02:21 AM
9

Dealing with the Ex / STBXI_am_a_neophyte/r/Divorce_Men26/01/26 12:02 AM
9

Dealing with the Ex / STBXI_am_a_neophyte/r/Divorce_Men01/06/26 12:09 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
8

She went with the "Big Dawg" at the firm with the high rise building office. She's one of those, we'll make them pay lawyers. When I signed with mine he was $275/hr and told me he bumped to $350 for new clients. She just went with the most expensive she could find. Was a constant during our marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/26 03:58 PM
1

Spot on.
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/26 12:50 PM
11

Thank you! Yeah, I think I'm completely done with relationships. The juice isn't worth the squeeze.
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/26 03:07 AM
2

I forgot about it's half! Excellent point!
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/26 09:56 PM
2

I probably will to put in my little info folder. Oh, heck yeah, she's saying her car is worth like $3.5K. The title us and/or so we are planning on giving her $3.5K cash that day since she is akways bemoaning being broke. She'll say no and I'll then get my fair share of equity. She's just being a butthole at every turn.
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/26 08:09 PM
2

My attorney said just search for similar ones for sale within 100 miles. There was a huge amount of same year, model, equipment, and within +-10K miles. They said that's a pretty easy sell, hopefully, at mediation or a no-brainer in court. Here's hoping her side can explain why court us a bad idea.......
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/26 05:52 PM
2

You're right, absolutely. I'm just over here bullshit math. The last day we communicated directly she gave me a, to quote her, amazing settlement offer. The offer consisted of exactly 50% of marital debts, minus my car debt, and $1,800.00 on top. Her lawyer even apologized on her behalf for that when mine sent a WTF email. We have a plan to do just that, as of now she has "has proof" her paid off vehicles are valued about 20% of their value. We will offer to pay her that since her attorney alway…
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/26 04:05 PM
1

My lawyer says about 90% of his cases that go to mediation are settled there. In our state, you're looking at minimum $5K more if it goes to court. My lawyer also intends to remind her attorney that there are some actions the STBX took that were documented and will look extremely bad for her in court will be shared. So, I'm hopeful it'll work out in mediation.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/26 03:57 PM
1

Word.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/26 03:49 PM
2

Unfortunately she is unwilling to do shit. We have court scheduled, but can get into mediation faster. I'm willing to gamble on paying 1/2 the mediator if I can wrap this up quicker. I'm, unfortunately going backwards weekly in this situation.
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/26 02:28 AM
1

Excellent point. Thank you!
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/26 12:47 AM
1

That's awesome! I think maybe, for me, it was more her dream house and to me a house that I lived in. I wouldn't have chose it in the first place.
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/26 12:46 AM
1

I mean yeah, but I'm still married. I'll start talking myself up.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 11:48 PM
1

That's awesome you are going to be so set up. Good for you, man! She abandoned also, and I could pull off a buyout, but it's just too much of our life in this house for me. No matter what I did it'd be too many memories. At least our improvements bump up the value so we have a lot of equity. Going to get a smaller more my style place and start fresh.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 11:47 PM
2

She has very few friends. I know of one that would absolutely say yes if I asked, but I won't. She's the wanna be puppet master who is bitterly single and I'm sure got into her ear. Thank you!
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 11:42 PM
2

Thanks man. I can try to take it off, but have had issues actually keeping it off. I shall try again. Maybe I'll find my balls.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 11:40 PM
2

But, they are pretty, soft, curvy, have those eyes, and frequently smell good. No worries, I have no pickup lines. I have virtually zero game. I may try.........
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 11:39 PM
1

Thank you. My attorney was super chill with them at the start and if I talk with him I can tell by his voice he will be calling he's right after. He is in not to be trifled with mode at this point.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 11:37 PM
1

Congrats man! That's good news! Mine was going to buy me out, until that meant she was going to have only one income. Here's hoping you have no drama!
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 11:35 PM
3

The last few times we spoke she was mostly extremely irritated until she snapped and I said, no more. It's funny how their minds work. They (I am assuming about your ex) want a divorce, then get angry when things change and they get what they want. My STBXW was so very confused when she was served. All Pikachu Face and shit.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 11:34 PM
1

Yup, she is zero percent a fan. I'm worried about retaliation, but if she does it hurts herself more. I hope she's straightened out a little.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 11:31 PM
3

Congrats man. The honestly feels like a pretty good outcome. I've been struggling with trying to be maybe a bit too fair, but as my attorney out it, some people just become unreasonable.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 11:29 PM
8

Ummm....... yeah, sure, but....... I don't know how anymore. Fuck, I still wear my ring. That's common sense, but a pretty big thing for me to ask myself to do.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 03:44 PM
1

Sadly, what meager retirement accounts went into said home and what I'd rebuilt had a loan pulled to get the house ready to sell. Massive home equity, not a ton of debt (20% of equity if priced below value), and a fairly even asset split.
/r/Divorce_Men22/02/26 01:56 AM
1

Yeah, you're right. She got upset, because my counsel told me to get ahead of our offer by telling her we had the house appraised and her "numbers" were substantially low.
/r/Divorce_Men22/02/26 01:53 AM
1

Yup, you are absolutely correct. Her mask was some Oscar worthy act.
/r/Divorce_Men22/02/26 01:51 AM
1

Excellent question. We have flat fees for some aspects of divorce in my state and my lawyer is very open to letting us use methods that don't kick us into the hourly realm. They absolutely offered it, but I'm resistant to paying a process server possibly multiples times since the location she said she is staying is in fact not accurate.
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/26 12:14 AM
1

I know it will get better, but it's so hard with how bleak I feel. Yeah. Every few days a new memory pops back that pushes the timeline slightly back to show how long she has been planning. Most recently there is an even that had ticket sales go live 5 months ago. She was pumped for sale day for MONTHS. She never bought tickets and said her friend bought for all of us. I shoukd have realized then because they were travelling during the sale. I'm glad your kids are becoming fine young men. That's…
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/26 10:53 PM
1

I'm trying man, I'm trying.
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/26 10:47 PM
1

You're right, 100%. She planned it out and mentioned nothing about issues or problems. I mean, she has not spoken to me in over a month.
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/26 02:04 PM
2

He is pretty much of the, we're going to bash this out ASAP program. That's why I went with him, I think, no we'll do tgat at your pace. He already is like 8 or 9 steps ahead of me. You're right, it was a success until it was not. Pretty much all communication at this point will run through the attorney since she only responds to him it seems.
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/26 12:13 AM
1

Thank you. I only plan for misery. Her thing for the last several months has been, everything is only done on my terms. She's going to go nuclear when she learns she has very little control now.
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/26 12:10 AM
1

I know, bit my dumb ass is busted up.
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/26 12:08 AM
1

Trying and failing miserably.
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/26 12:08 AM
1

Man, my grace jug is pretty empty right now. I intellectually know it will get better, but I can't see the good now. I've never in all my decades thought I'd love someone that way, even if one sided.
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/26 12:07 AM
1

I know a relationship is a two-way street, and it's not all on me. I just feel like a failure in a sense that it fucking blindsided me. You know, hindsight is 20/20 and all. Also, feel like a failure because I know her so well, and for some stupid reason I fucking expected her to do what she said she'd do. Why did I expect her to change now? I don't fucking know. Also, the big one is, I let her in. I knew many many years ago, it was a bad idea.
/r/Divorce_Men07/02/26 09:51 PM
1

Oh, they sent me contact info for appraisers who have been used before.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/26 04:38 AM
1

That's awesome news. Thank you!
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/26 04:26 AM
1

Thank you! Our appraisers are licensed too.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/26 12:35 AM
1

Thank you! She has a couple house mods she hasn't finished yet that'd look like unfinished projects. She doesn't know I've got a quote to finish them and if we go the sell route they'll be done the second I realize we are going that way. I'm just getting kind of worried/anxious since it's a massive sum of money.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/26 12:34 AM
1

Yup, I think that's the plan. Thank you!
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/26 12:20 AM
1

Thanks! I'm not even looking for 50% across the board. I want 50% of the equity and the few things I have in writing she said I could have in exchange for her keeping the car I paid off for her. I don't want much from the house so that shouldn't be tough. Her car is worth a bit over double the value of stuff we swapped for so I doubt she'll fight there.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/26 12:19 AM
1

I've known this particular Realtor for ages, the trust is there. That is what worries me about her "research." I wonder if there is a vast difference it can be challenged? I may find out. Lol. Thank you for the reply.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/26 12:16 AM
1

Thanks, man. Yeah, you're right. I have conceded a few things to her out of kindness in her mind, but in reality it was for the items that she could have an upper hand on me if she went for them. Luckily/hopefully her agreeing via text multiple times and them being in storage already are enough if she tries funny business.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/26 07:59 PM
2

Thanks, man. I'm trying my best. I hate to say it, but with how distraught the dog was really made me get out of sadness fast. She would follow me through the house an inch behind me and if I wasn't standing basically became a blanket for me. Not by choice either. Lol.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/26 07:56 PM
2

Thanks, man. That's an excellent point. 99% of conversation is via text and things are very thoroughly written out.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/26 07:53 PM
5

Thank you, man. That's a reason I got the storage unit. Here's hoping this goes quickly.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/26 02:01 PM
3

It did, thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/26 12:42 PM
3

Thanks, man. I did feel better after I wrote all that and it only took a couple hours to fall asleep. Now I'm just waking up, so actually not awful so far.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/26 12:42 PM
3

Good point. Mostly I do things like that for when she inevitably shows the texts to others.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/26 12:39 PM
3

Thank you. I am doing my best. I find myself writing things like, I find it unhelpful when you leave my text on read for 16 hours, but if I don't reply to you in 5 minutes you say hateful things and could that please not happen anymore?
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/26 02:54 AM
5

Thank you, man.
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/26 02:51 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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