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Madholley Archive

View 9 posts and 744 comments by Madholley on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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327

God your gift idea is so simple and yet so amazing and so superior to his lame shit. It's painful that they don't think like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/04/22 11:12 PM
6

Absolutely. You can request to remove listings, too!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/22 02:29 PM
33

I understand. I know it's difficult. Just keep reading the handbook and honestly, be wary of men who say they like "feminine women" and describe themselves as "romantic." Neither of these statements are appropriate to say to someone you haven't met. Keep it light and keep vetting!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/22 02:29 PM
318

Wait- what is the FDS stance on telling them why we are unmatching? Doesn't this just make it easier to hide their bad behavior from the next queen? I thought block and delete was for our protection and that it was done without explanation- we aren't here to educate scrotes to fly under the radar, right?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/22 03:11 AM
5

So what is the takeaway? Next time don't bother measaging if someone matches on other sites?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/04/22 12:30 AM
232

Sorry but this is HYSTERICAL. Not what he did to you- I am truly apologetic for his disrespect- but this man is missing a month every year to mourn a relationship?? Sir. You need therapy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/22 10:50 PM
65

This thought process...been there, done that, damn. We can't blame ourselves though. We were socialized that way. It takes time to wake up from brainwashing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/22 10:47 PM
68

She basically spent her whole trip on dates. Couldn't be me. There are so many other ways to spend your time...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/22 03:04 PM
50

Quick and ruthless is a block and delete the first time they bring up interest in anything romantic. You're not on dating sites when you meet these men, correct? You don't have to "make it clear" that you're not looking. End the conversation when they bring it up. It's inappropriate to do with someone you just met, on any forum.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/22 02:30 AM
89

I don't understand. How are your boundaries "quick and ruthless" if you're saying things like "You have 10 seconds to reply I understand or you get blocked"?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/22 11:25 PM
36

Why reply? You're either teaching him how to hide his low value from the next queen, or feeding his ego by giving him attention, or both! Please confirm you saw one of the many commenters telling you that replying is NOT the move. You don't need an arsenal of replies. You need the confidence and the coolness to read a message like that, block him, and delete it. End of story. Say it with us: no drink dates, no paragraphing!!!! You got this!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/22 12:03 PM
24

My new favorite comeback!!!!!!!! Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/22 02:13 PM
189

I hope the comments told her to leave and not to "work through it together."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/22 02:11 PM
72

This is such a brilliant, and devastating, observation. Thank you for sharing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/22 02:10 PM
202

Wait but if this is true, women partners should ALSO get a pat on the back. Or maybe a parade? Because men literally throw themselves at us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/22 05:04 PM
116

I LOVE your energy in this convo. This is the real-life equivalent of screenshotting a DM and sending it to the girlfriend. We all should be doing this all the time. Thank you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/22 05:03 PM
36

I love this!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/22 05:03 PM
11

This was the advice she got on her last post. From everyone. Based on the length of this one...I don't think she took it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/22 11:49 PM
4

Not having a connection has nothing to do with you. But I recommend keeping texting to a minimum. Have your vetting questions (not obvious- what did you do for fun this weekend is a great one for me, as I don't drink much) but I think a conversation about goals is better for an actual date.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 12:11 AM
13

YES QUEEN kicked him OUT!!! Give all that labor back to yourself!!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/22 07:33 PM
24

Thank you!! I am so grateful for the support of this community and that we are taking back our power from the losers who tried to hold us down!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/22 07:32 PM
49

You're not doing anything wrong. Dating with high standards is difficult. I do have a few questions: (1) How long are you texting? FDS advises keeping texting to a minimum, just to vet. I text briefly and then if they ask to go further, schedule a phone screening (15 mins) to determine if I am interested in accepting a date invitation. Endless texting without intentions to go further and meet- block after a certain time. For me it's one week. (2) What kind of connection are you looking for? You …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/22 07:30 PM
21

Thank you!! What a great read!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/22 06:16 PM
134

Ok sorry for fangirling in all the comments but holy shit I love this sub. Y'all are amazing!!! My level ups: -Professional designation, which led to a big raise -Responsible budget for the big raise, so my savings goals are set for the next two years and I finally feel comfortable -Started a side consulting business, for fun money -Using fun money to travel, build a better wardrobe, and improve my house -Adopted a dog because I wanted something to care for and walk -Taking training to get certi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/22 02:54 PM
16

Awesome goals!! Good luck in boot camp!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/22 02:45 PM
21

I'm so proud of you for crushing all of these areas of life. And super glad the ex chose work over you...to give you the push you needed to fill your time with better things!! You are doing so great!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/22 02:45 PM
33

Damn!!! Big congrats on the raise, the other financial progress, and giving yourself time to recover. Social time is a great way to reinvigorate yourself!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/22 02:43 PM
29

This list is INCREDIBLE. You are so inspiring!!! Keep up the great work!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/22 02:42 PM
34

Congratulations on the dream job!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/22 02:42 PM
49

These are all amazing!!! I am so impressed with your progress in all areas!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/22 02:41 PM
38

So, it's not copypasta, but another way to identify low effort scrotes is when they reflect your question about their interests right back on you. If you ask something specific to their profile, for example, they mention they like road tripping so you say where was your last road trip? And they tell you and then ask what about you? Just gets on my nerves so much. Like, I didn't put road trips in my profile. I don't take road trips. I asked because YOU put that down. As much as it annoys me, I'm …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/22 12:09 PM
13

Came here to say this!!! Like, yes, we knew you were a dumbfuck based on your points but damn. Also, a grown woman who can't say orgasm?? Ma'am.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/22 07:18 PM
107

THIS!!!!!!! Like, how horrible do you feel for these women?? Oh no she was so hot, what a tragedy. Did you...get to know her? At all?? Men act like they simply can't control themselves and be rational around good looking women and ALSO want to act like they are the always rational sex who should in fact should run the world. Pick a lane, sir.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/22 06:59 PM
111

Let's be honest. No one is doing those things for this man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/03/22 02:51 PM
16

This comment is so on-point and terrifying. You are exactly right. Some of them are genuinely confused when they discover that what is pleasurable to them isn't also pleasurable to a woman by default. Terrifying.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/22 11:26 AM
299

"If the past 10 months of sex didn't create a lasting bond, WTF will?" THIS. He HAD it, so his reason for wanting it is ridiculous. When I found FDS, I was in a FWB situation. I know. But I saw some of the light here so I told him I decided I didn't enjoy sex without commitment. He told me he couldn't commit without having more sex, because he needed to "experience more love" before deciding to commit. After a year of having sex. And no, queens, I did not indulge him. Every time he suggested han…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/22 01:21 PM
36

Love this community and LOVE your username
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/22 04:23 AM
75

Thank you for this. I agree we need to forgive ourselves for how we were conditioned. And I'm impressed that you took action to align with your gut feelings, even with the struggle internally- excellent work!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/22 04:23 AM
55

Hey, really sorry about what happened to you, but thinking that "lumberjack, conservative" men are always straight is not accurate. I think you should take the anger at your ex and keep it on him, and stop spreading that hate to anything you associate with him. Nothing about nail polish is connected to cheating, and straight people can and do contract HIV.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/22 01:10 AM
130

I am so sorry for ALL of these. What a bunch of fucking assholes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/22 01:03 AM
26

Maybe they drifted apart because he was too busy love-bombing you and other women to put effort into the relationship. If he is as terrible as your post makes him seem, she has suffered also.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/22 12:53 AM
21

Oh my heart. I am hurting for you, this hurt to read. I am so sorry you let yourself get attached to this monster. And he is a monster. But I have to remind you of something really, really important. You only get this one life, and time is something you will never get back. Please, please stop giving him your time. If you need to write about him, do it in a journal, but time yourself. Ten minutes a day. Then move onto another task! You have given this man hours and hours and hours and even now..…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/03/22 08:13 PM
24

I KNOW!! Like...he never considers that he is rejected so often because his personality sucks.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/03/22 04:55 PM
60

Thank you for this comment! I think it is a very helpful way to establish a boundary, without chasing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/03/22 11:17 PM
19

This was heart-breaking and so well written. Thank you for sharing
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/03/22 07:50 PM
118

It's the "90% of my time, I just want to spend with him" for me. I'm glad she's happy but now that her brain is fully formed, she should be developing her own personality. Healthy relationships depend on having a life, hobbies, friends, etc OUTSIDE of each other. Because yes....if he drops her in 5 years or has a heart attack, she will have nothing but the patterns of codependency to fall back to on. No mature and mentally healthy 39 year old would want his partner to make her life all about him…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/03/22 12:52 AM
151

You know what's amazing is, none of their standards matter when you consider that they all want an 18-20 year old? The population is shrinking, with the largest part of the population being older. It's like a giant upside down pyramid, and all of the gross dudes at the heavy part of the pyramid want the girls from one age range at the bottom. If you subtract out the girls who date men their own age, the girls who aren't dating, and the girls who date women....whoooooo boy that's a small percenta…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/22 07:29 PM
101

I think we are on the right track here. Right after I posted this, I got the message that a concerned redditor has reached out about me. I've had my messages off for a long time so this is their only way to get through. Thank you, scrote, for confirming how angry it makes you that women don't need you. Love the proof!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/22 07:07 PM
92

I want to add that a huge green flag is men who understand and respect my safety measures. I had a man flip out about my using a Google voice number (OTHER GIRLS gave me their REAL NUMBER- instant block) versus a guy who said he understood and appreciated my trust when I finally told him my real name (I use a nickname on OLD to prevent scrotes from finding me on other platforms.) Also men who ask intelligent questions, are curious, read books and have hobbies- all green flags. Men whose humor is…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/22 03:09 PM
36

I love this!! Excellent point and example.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/22 03:06 PM
9

I'm so sorry for you. I went through something very similar. Reading your story about Christmas hurt...where he emotionally manipulated you for stating clearly your expectations. I'm so sorry. Lundy Bancroft's book "Why does he do that" helped me realize that all those terrible behaviors are a choice. He chooses to stay up all night and he chooses to mock you for making better choices. He does this intentionally to try and keep you down because it benefits him. You are doing the best thing by ma…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/22 07:47 PM
9

Came here to say this. I love it. They're co-opting the language of women who talk about "spiritual growth." Scrotes listen really hard when something might benefit them. I'm calling this a new red flag, anyone who uses the word spiritual to dress up a gross concept like wanting a title without the paperwork or being immature- NEXT.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/22 04:04 AM
210

I just... I can't believe he didn't also go to jail?? I hope he at least had his medical license removed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/22 03:55 AM
3

This comment hurts because it is so accurate. I am thankful to FDS for teaching that disrespectful behavior from men is not acceptable. I tolerated so much before when I was a pickme 🥲
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/22 03:01 PM
4

"I'd rather be lonely than repeatedly traumatized." THIS!!! I'm so sorry you went through this and I appreciate you sending that reminder. You are so right. Loneliness hurts. As for getting a test- I don't see any shame in it, at all. But I agree the doctors can make it uncomfortable. The last time I felt even slightly shamed, I just told the doc "He cheated." That shut him up 🥰
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/22 02:59 PM
9

What is with the guy telling him how to frame his porn addiction?? And to "apply compliments"? Like damn they are just straight up admitting that this is all about manipulation strategies???
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/22 10:59 AM
58

I love how he says he needs her to help him and encourage! He just needs mOrE lOvE when he fucks strangers!!!! These are the same men who will murder you for looking at another man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/22 09:16 PM
91

THIS is why I come to FDS. I love the community, I love OPs post but the savage humor- absolute chef's kiss. This comment has me in tears. Thank you for making me laugh so fucking hard.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/22 06:39 PM
36

NOOOOOO not the video!!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/22 10:50 AM
43

This is painful but hilarious. The last line is so fucking ON POINT. How do they manage to believe this?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/22 10:47 AM
82

I love this!! Mine: Emotionally stunted Army officer with crippling insecurity seeks smart, beautiful, fit woman who will coddle me in response to drunken verbal abuse. You should enjoy being shouted at and never raise your own voice. Must have a high sex drive when my penis works and be content without sex when it doesn't. I will worship you and beg for degrading sex acts but if you ever consent to any of them, I will call you a whore. All my photos are from years ago, before I had acne and an …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/22 10:47 AM
44

A class issue?!? To wait for a bathroom that will be available in minutes??? I'm so glad you got away.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/22 10:28 AM
222

Honestly I was thinking that there was no pimple, and he scratched her while trying to finger her, but she was too embarrassed to admit this. The labia pimple was a less horrible story for her. And yes. Unalive me when I am coming to Reddit to talk about how my dirty CURRENT boyfriend almost killed me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/22 10:27 AM
6

Such a great point!! This is clearly manipulation- he has obviously pushed boundaries before, and this was a new way to do that. By calling when she was asleep and making it about buying them both breakfast, he hoped to catch her off guard. It's just breakfast, etc. But once he has that PIN, he will continue. "I was just getting gas" and "I used it to buy something for you." I hope she gets out now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/22 10:25 AM
23

This was hysterical and depressing. Brava 👏
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/22 07:26 PM
8

I'd introduce her to FDS. Sorry to disagree with all the wonderful ladies commenting above. I was a former pickme and this site saved me. Maybe she can see some red flags and get out before the wedding. I know it's a small chance but if you can save a life, isn't it worth it to try? As someone said above, you can lead a horse to water but you can't make them drink. But you can lead them. Worst case, she will mock FDS publicly which will inevitably spread our message further and find another woma…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/22 07:17 PM
104

Thank you for this!!! I LOVE period sex, because the orgasm relieves my cramps. And honestly while I have had some LVM try and say it's gross, I have also had women try and shame me for this. It is natural. It happens all the damn time. This is a total vetting strategy for me now. If men have issues with periods, I educate them about the cycle, and then dip. Oh, and my favorite line? "Your first meal in the womb was period blood." Misogynistic LVMs HATE it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/22 10:39 PM
122

I KNOW. She thought now that they're engaged she could stop vetting and protecting herself. Never stop.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/22 07:24 PM
2

All of this is incredible. Your comment on second chances in particular. Thank you for posting this!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/22 08:42 PM
126

Your choice! I unmatch- as anything after a clapback won't be a good use of my time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/22 12:37 AM
186

Anna also conned individuals- the woman she took on her last trip was on the hook for a ton of credit card debt. Like 62k? Imagine how much stress that would put on you. I'm not saying the swindler guy should be free. I'm saying Anna deserved to go to jail, and so does he.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/22 12:13 AM
780

OMG YES. When will they stop throwing themselves at us?? Sign me up for that world!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/22 04:35 PM
181

The mental gymnastics here. And for what? I'd love to know what this man adds to her life that is worth this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/22 10:12 AM
107

I loved this. Someone can make $70k starting RIGHT NOW in the right career, and have benefits AND boundaries. This man has smoked himself stupid. I can't decide if I hope he finds someone as delusional as him (who will naturally be as disorganized since, constantly stoned) or if he stays alone forever. For sure Pepper Pots got paid from day one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/22 01:30 AM
15

Thank you for having sympathy for her!! I do too. I wish she had just blocked after he didn't contact her the next day but I understand why she reached out. She let him in. His response infuriated me. Here's hoping she finds us, and avoids this in the future (no four hour dates is an excellent rule and has saved me from so much of this crap.)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/22 07:43 PM
7

Thank you! Saving this. I'm sure it will be appropriate to a conversation soon enough.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/22 05:57 PM
29

I like Bumble. It's so easy to tell who put effort into their profile, it's good for a laugh when you see the ones who didn't, and for a small fee you can set your profile to private so that only men who you swipe right on can even see you. This has been worth every penny for me when I see exes profiles and know they can't see mine. Also, I know this goes without saying, but don't use photos you have posted anywhere else, and always use Google voice when you are finally ready to exchange numbers…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/22 05:44 PM
190

Proper response imo would be mentioning that you were trying to forget how disappointing he was in the bedroom and you forgot him all together. Fuck a man who calls you out for ignoring him- which was the actual proper response.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/22 01:03 AM
17

I was just thinking this!! Now they can be together. Except they won't.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/22 07:53 PM
29

All of the advice above is excellent. What he's doing by "hiding her" is triangulating you both. He is presenting you as this unstable and toxic woman, likely also allowing him to manipulate her by claiming you damaged him. Now, this doesn't affect you at all and boundaries plus grey rock as mentioned above is excellent. If you are feeling resentful that he is "housing her," please take some time to work through those feelings. She has to live with him. He is likely cheating and emotionally abus…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/22 07:41 PM
21

Same, girl. Linemen, military, welders and bartenders are the most common. No thanks. I also love the dudes who put a joke in for their job? Tells me everything I need to know.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 07:19 PM
41

I think it helps to practice in low-stakes situations. So like, go somewhere they are handing out free samples. Say no. Call Spectrum and ask about signing up for internet. Say no. I'm serious, I feel like this is a reflex thing. Like you have to build muscle memory for saying no. If you can get comfortable doing this when there are NO STAKES, it will be easier to do it when you are emotionally invested. You will still feel guilty the first few times you do it. I encourage you to acknowledge tha…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 07:07 PM
182

He was jUsT jOkInG (unless she agrees to it)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 06:55 PM
46

I'm so sorry about your friend. I hope she gets away from him someday. This is why it's so important for FDS to say always block and delete when we see red flags. It's so easy to make excuses once attached.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 06:52 PM
115

I appreciate you posting this. I do think reprogramming is a challenge, but I think your point is that vetting is less exhausting than settling for an incompatible/disrespectful/abusive partner and I wholeheartedly agree.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 06:34 PM
1

This hurts because it's true
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 10:46 AM
45

I love this. We need ALL women to get on board with this- laughing in the face of men who propose wasting your time for nothing. Because the sad truth is...at some point, some woman has likely said yes to a 90 minute drive for coffee with a scrote who doesn't know how to vet. Never again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 10:20 AM
21

UGH on the man who wrote about himself on his Valentine's day post!! How do they not see how selfish and insane that is?! It makes your partner seem like an object for your enjoyment. My NVX did this once- I asked for a list of things he loved about me...and they were all about him. "I love how you make sure I eat something" "I love when you dress up for me" So thankful for FDS bc now this shit makes me 🤢🤢🤢🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 10:07 AM
73

Didn't you know that women actually love slovenly men and dad bods and laziness? We're just NOT VISUAL CREATURES /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 10:04 AM
65

Omg this!!!!! The men who complain about basic bitches list "whiskey" as an interest and will 100% wax poetic about some crappy movie from 15+ years ago. It's exhausting that they feel so entitled to judge everyone else. Like sir, when is the last time you learned something new...or flossed? I bet your passions are wonderful and I agree with OP that it's manipulative and misogynistic when men claim that they want wOmEn WiTh PaSsIoN. Most women are passionate about something. Most humans are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 10:02 AM
69

I LOVE the "would have" shit!!! My NVX always did this- if we fought, he was "going to" take me out that weekend...or if he did something shitty and never apologized so I called him out he "would have" apologized IF I wasn't such a bitch!! Even if he had a week to do it, nope, the perfect timing was always exactly after I acted like a human and asked for respect. I'm glad you saw through that stupid ploy!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/22 01:45 AM
18

Why we shouldn't have LV men as friends.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/22 11:47 PM
27

This is hilarious and I am definitely doing this. I'm sorry you got the angry matches but it's a genius vetting strategy!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/22 10:14 PM
4

Also- Volunteering or tutoring are way healthier ways to give and get plutonic affection! There are people and animals who are deserving of your time and attention. And you won't feel used afterwards.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/22 10:10 PM
17

I'm sorry you are going through this!! I would say acknowledge those feelings you have when you see him, and try and introspect. What is it you are really feeling- are you just longing for a relationship? If so, remind yourself that a relationship with someone who doesn't feel the same way would be exhausting and ultimately unsatisfying. And then find ways to re-direct that loving energy towards yourself. Is there something about him in particular that is really so captivating? If so, what? Figu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/22 10:09 PM
14

The logic here is dizzying....he's not into me so let me impress him with my choice of walk location? I hope this woman comes to her senses.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/22 09:58 PM
4

Thank you for calling this out!!! Blew my mind
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/22 08:07 PM
142

This is an important caveat. This means he is likely 400lb. Literally sick imagining a man timing his "cuddles" with some poor, tiny woman who literally cannot escape him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/22 10:14 PM
129

I loved that bit. Let me explain why I don't have time for a coherent discussion right before I dump a bunch of easily disprovable facts. 99% of men don't commit crimes? Sure. That's why so many women haven't been raped, according to him. The expert.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/22 03:25 AM
144

I added a voice prompt listing green flags like "kindness" and "proper grammar." I get way less matches because I seem high-maintenance but the ones I do get are usually better. Agree with others that giving strangers a look at a sexy photo is not good.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/22 12:52 AM
51

A professional coach once told me that saying "Yes, but" weakens your yes. Food for thought.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/22 08:15 PM
245

THIS!!!!! I do this every time. Another option is to ask them to define it. You would be shocked at what some men say. This can show a huge red flag early on, so it's great! And when you have finished blocking them under the table while they continue to struggle to define it, you can pull it up on Google and show them the definition: "the advocacy of women's rights BASED UPON EQUALITY OF THE SEXES." Who wouldn't be a feminist?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/22 08:14 PM
68

And she allowed this for FORTY FIVE MINUTES. In exchange for one minute sex and cuddles. I want to help this woman.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/22 03:45 AM
34

Thank you for this point!! We have to help each other.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/22 03:43 AM
123

I don't think reddit is a good barometer for the real world. More stories are being told about rape in real life and in pop culture (promising young woman, I may destroy you, etc.) It takes decades to change social perception but it seems to me that the markers are there that change is happening...slowly. But yeah not on Reddit, which is a place where not-great men congregate and also troll.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/22 11:38 PM
2

I wish Lundy made tshirts I would 100% be a walking billboard for this man
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/22 02:07 AM
15

This is an excellent point and I wish I could have this message flash across OPs phone, computer, mind!! I also wish I had known this years ago.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/22 08:12 PM
7

Sounds like you learned a lot about yourself. Congrats on getting out!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/22 08:10 PM
105

This!!!! Like. So honest about just being dicks, just because??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/22 10:41 PM
51

Thank you for including the good advice. Makes my heart happy to see such helpfulness on reddit outside of FDS
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/22 10:32 PM
377

I know it's rough but can we recognize that we've all made mistakes, some heartbreaking, some obvious in retrospect? I try not to blame women for "not knowing better." He was a criminal and a manipulator. He had much more experience manipulating people than any of these women had in vetting. They are telling their stories and maybe saving other women from making the same mistakes- they likely knew they would be mocked and blamed. Can we support their openness? Not saying you have to watch it. Ju…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/22 10:26 PM
54

Gosh what a perfect ending that would be!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/22 03:24 AM
27

Thank you for this. We need compassion for ourselves and others and agree on holding the manipulator responsible, not the person being manipulated!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/02/22 03:18 PM
25

I love this and also cracking up on "made him feel stupid....probably because he was." When I'm around people who are smarter than I am, it makes me want to rise to the occasion and work harder. If a smart partner makes you feel stupid, you're not just stupid, you're lazy too!! Glad you escaped that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/02/22 03:16 PM
88

Oohhh love when they use humor to show their true colors!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/02/22 03:14 PM
105

"Sometimes rejection is God's protection" << this is amazing. Thank you for posting this. I love it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/02/22 03:12 PM
5

I love this take. And I think this applies to women, too. By having sex early on, I think we are (perhaps subconsciously) demonstrating that we too only value our bodies- that what we have to offer is just that. This is the struggle with pickmeism. We have to learn to value things about ourselves beyond our looks and our bodies, which is an uphill battle given how we were socialized. I'd say it's just as difficult to be a high-value woman as it is to be a high-value man. By stating only that tru…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/02/22 01:21 PM
83

First, congratulations on recognizing this about yourself!! This is a great starting point. I don't have a book recommendation but I can share my efforts in this space with you. I noticed this same thing about myself. What I started doing was, after interactions like the one you listed above, I would write down how I might have handled things differently. For example, the friend who made the disparaging comment about your role- could you have said, "I can't speak for your boyfriends colleague, b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/22 10:45 PM
5

This is where I'd show my ass- "Sounds like you need help managing your budget. Happy to help you spend less on non-essential items so you can pay for school fees. Otherwise I can take you to court for 13 years of back child support, and they'll help you manage that budget by taking it directly out of your paychecks." These guys are a joke. Family court doesn't play. You have children, you are financially responsible for those children, until you sign away your parental rights. End of story. And…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/22 08:31 PM
66

Honestly sometimes I think it's really nice of them to show their true colors right there in the About Me section. I always smirk a little like, wow, y'all make it so easy, thank you!! Not that he had a chance with you anyway with that awful grammar/punctuation....even a good summary can be ruined with poor presentation. Love to know what his job is though, where he is getting PAID to KNOW things.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/22 04:30 AM
20

I came here to say this. Desiring to date men who shower and treat us with respect is toxic? Men who don't shower or behave respectfully are free to continue existing peacefully. We just...don't date them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/22 04:39 AM
22

ALSO ME. Plus floordrobe. I love this place.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/22 12:32 AM
28

So many excellent points!!! The inability to control our repulsion is a great one. I am saving that for the next time a man says it's biology that makes him attracted to children. Sure, scrote, and it's biology that makes me repulsed by it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/22 12:18 AM
34

She is amazing. I love that the takeaway is FIGHT BACK. Too long women were told to go along with it, give him what he wants, or try and run. Fight back!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/22 07:24 PM
186

This is so upsetting. I have totally dealt with exes who immediately wanted to reference all the men I am fucking. In my experience, this is a sign of him cheating. He likely threw her out so he could meet with another woman. Guessing it didn't work out, as now he wants her to drive back to him so he can convince her to stay. If the watch meant anything to him, he would have contacted her, and offered to come get it. I agree with another commenter who said, pawn that shit. If she hadn't run into…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/22 05:53 PM
204

Oof- only been speaking a short amount of time, still getting to know each other, and had sex several times? Please read the handbook. No sex without commitment. You need to build a relationship before you add sex and it sounds like you need to do some work on your self-esteem. No man can make you feel good about yourself. You have to do the work to feel that. You might want to end this FWB situation and take some time off for awhile, until you're ready to date with boundaries. Sending love for …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/22 01:57 AM
5

"HOW DARE SHE WANT A GIFT WITH MEANING what an absolute bitch!!!!!! What a miserable woman!!" Seriously wtf are they mad she doesn't eat cookies?!?!? Jesus.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/22 01:50 AM
30

I feel sorry for these women. Of course they made mistakes and ignored red flags- but haven't we all? Lucky for me, when I did this, it only cost me time and not $250,000. But I think it's too easy to sit back and judge other women for what they should have done. This man is clearly very good at manipulating women. Let's just sigh in FDS, hope these women have strong support systems, and agree that yet another immediate block and delete is any man asking for money, regardless of his financial si…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/22 02:39 PM
74

They never know this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/22 12:11 AM
9

This is so helpful to have as a guide. Thank you. These are all totally reasonable and you are right that this would be a truly changed man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/22 10:51 PM
65

I didn't have to read much to determine that he is a misogynist. He may say some of the right things but much like any NVM, the flags are there. His choice of language reveals a lot- in one of his top Twitter posts, he says that a man will ask you to meet him informally because "you're not worth the effort of planning a date." This is categorically false. Men do not determine our value, ever. A man may not plan a date because he is lazy, because he thinks other women will settle for his low effo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/22 02:07 PM
43

I am so loving this trend. I love how it highlights how ridiculous these men are. Thank you for posting!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/22 01:59 PM
23

😂😂😂 The fiction is weak with that one. Rugburn on his face, while having it ridden? Is he suggesting she is riding the SIDE of his face, or that somehow she is horizontal on the carpet when riding it....do these dudes even slightly think about what their scenario would really be like or just word vomit this shit?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/22 01:54 PM
152

I have a few thoughts to share: -I don't volunteer that I am dating other men. If they ask directly, I will say something vague like I am free to date until I become exclusive. No details, change the subject. If they ask for details I see that as a red flag; controlling and jealous. -I don't ask if they are dating other women. I pay attention to certain things; do they seem to get confused about things (Ie, "I thought I told you this" or "Don't you have a flower tattoo?" nope and nope!) Are they…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/22 02:03 AM
46

He had a chance to make an effort and he hasn't. Delete him on snapchat and move on with your life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/22 07:53 PM
101

Seriously though. How many romantic movies has FDS ruined for you?? I was sick recently and laid up in bed and tried to revisit some familiar lovey dovey films from my past and all of them were so upsetting. One of the most disappointing was First Wives Club. I cannot believe that Brenda gets back with her sleazy husband because she has lost weight and they have a son. I used to think this movie was so empowering. Is there a list of FDS approved films somewhere??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/22 03:50 PM
7

Ughhhh yes she paragraphed him excuses. Hate to see it!!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/22 02:02 AM
20

What is really bothering me here is the numbers. He is moving in with her so likely saving on rent. Where I live, a studio apartment would be around $1,000 while a 2-bedroom would be $1400-$1600. So if he is already saving $200-$300 from moving in, spending $700 to furnish shouldn't be a big deal??? He will save more than that in 6 months. Why would you risk your relationship over a few hundred dollars when she is doing you a favor letting you move in???
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/22 04:30 PM
36

Some man on OLD once asked me on a screening phone call- if I could get one wish, what would it be? I said "For all people to be safe and healthy." His response was that without war and disease, we would overpopulate the planet and all die from lack of resources. I responded that if all women were safe, they would be free to choose not to have children. He was silent for a full two minutes. It's like it never occurred to him that many women want something else from life outside of having babies.…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/22 04:24 PM
47

Thank you!!! I love this community. Also- this is so silly but you know what is really bothering me after reading this earlier today....aside from his behavioral pattern and other women not protecting her, I despise that he told her he always reciprocates oral sex and literally did not even try to do that with her. Like, once she wouldn't let him fuck, he abandoned all pretense. Although the rest of his actions were even more disturbing for some reason this part is like. The shitty icing on the …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/22 07:32 PM
52

This made me laugh out loud. And then get a little sad because some women are actually going on murder dates. Gotta keep spreading the FDS truths!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/22 01:04 PM
51

This was heartbreaking. Thank you for sharing. Who is it about, though? I think we have to start calling out and shaming these men, although I understand why Domenica doesn't do it. It just makes her a further target. Edited to add: the comments are a dumpster fire. A few are supportive but some of them are downright insane. I'm about to jump in.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/22 01:01 PM
43

Right!! This whole line of thinking is designed to make women think there is a scarcity and they should settle. Last time I checked, we aren't all in agreement about who the top 2% of men are? Personally I don't date men with long hair, and I prefer men who are 5'8-5'10. So like. Other women have different standards. What the fuck?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/22 04:15 AM
63

This is so upsetting. How could anyone think this is normal?? I'm so glad you got away and yes, let me say it, he was definitely a pervert!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/22 03:28 AM
86

They were heavily soiled????! In a public environment?!!!? That article was appalling.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/22 12:08 PM
29

So true. And I love that he focuses so hard on her trying to find him and how it's thirsty bc after the beach they "never spoke again after that day." Like yes dude. These are related. She got your number from you and wanted to talk again....hence the video. My God watching him was painful. Sir just admit you were flirting and own it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/22 03:19 PM
11

Hey...thank you for sharing. A lot of us have been there. What you experienced resonates deeply with me- I also dated a man who turned his apologies back on me, who blamed my past for his shitty behavior, who took advantage of my kindness and my openness, who left me feeling sad and confused. The good news is, you got out. Try not to blame yourself for falling prey to his abuse. You shouldn't blame yourself for owning a home when someone robs you. He was the one who did wrong. He is the guilty p…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/22 03:09 PM
202

I literally came here to say this!! I get this in my 30s! I can't tell you how many profiles of 34+ men who say they were a "college athlete." Like sir...that was ten years ago. Is there anything about your life now that you'd like to share?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 09:25 PM
82

You put this so perfectly!! And the inherent contradiction is glaring. These dudes really want everything for nothing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 03:14 PM
4

I love this post. This is what I want to show idiots who call us femcels or toxic. Like...we literally just want to be happy and healthy, and expect our partners to be the same. I love when success stories posted here are about leveling up. Thank you so much for sharing and congratulations on your growth!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 03:13 PM
48

I am so proud of you for recognizing that his trauma response occurred when you said no. That is so deeply disturbing. Congratulations for handling this abuse so well, and for getting out of this horrible situation and thank you for sharing this warning to others.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/22 06:17 PM
2

Thank you for the update. We have all been where you were. Happy to support you so you can make informed choices. I am guessing you left the unambitious dude?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/22 06:09 PM
1

I was replying to OPs post. I do not have anymore internalized misogyny than anyone else raised in the current society, just strong reading comprehension skills!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/22 06:06 PM
1

I was replying to OP. She literally said "you can't discuss makeup and fashion trends with men."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/22 06:05 PM
27

THIS. I would be so fucking mortified- taking a picture would be the last thing on my mind.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/22 04:38 PM
47

And we love to see it 😍
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/22 03:00 AM
22

Thank you for the summary! I couldn't get past the intro where she spent way too long defending herself from potential future commenters. Like...just make your video. The internet's gonna internet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/22 11:47 AM
22

I didn't meet a single guy on Hinge 😂😂 Literally never got past the phone call for any of them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/22 02:10 PM
28

You are way too invested. Block and delete and take some time to focus on yourself before dating again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/22 01:46 AM
5

This is perfection!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/22 01:46 AM
49

Look for groups of women with similar interests- whether that's a rock climbing gym, a poetry group, or anything in between. Local networking group? Charitable organization? It's difficult with covid but many organizations are still doing things online. I teach yoga and I find yoga teacher trainings are a great way to make friends. Get comfortable putting yourself around people who share your interests and then start asking those people you want to be friends with, to connect individually later …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/22 04:08 PM
174

I get it...but you know that you engaging with them at all gives them a dopamine hit, right? Besides not being worth your time, you're giving him attention, even when you feel like you "turned his comment around." I'm sorry it made you so pissed to be "judged, condemned and negged" by a stranger on the internet. Those are the best times to detach, take some time off, reevaluate your priorities and fall back in love with yourself. No one has the power to piss you off unless you give it to them. A…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/01/22 08:02 PM
56

This is so true. But I do love that this is a safe space for women to ask these questions and get this answer from women who have been there- and not scrotes telling her to cOmMuNiCaTe so she settles.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/01/22 07:52 PM
395

How can I upvote this 6,000 times because YES. Mediocre for him equals painful and miserable for her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/22 12:42 AM
3

This is so fucking accurate but not in their playbook to take responsibility
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/22 12:16 PM
13

Oh boy. BEEN THERE. And then if you pull out the evidence you're a "crazy bitch" for "logging evidence against him." My NVX would do this- "I never said that" and then I show him where he did and then it's either "I DIDNT KNOW THIS WAS A COURT OF LAW" or "Well even though I explicitly said X in writing and never explained it or apologized for it, I didn't actually mean X! You should just know that!"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/22 12:15 PM
11

I am so sorry this happened to you. This is gaslighting 101. My NVX did this too- he would drunkenly verbally assault me, calling me horrible names and bringing up painful things from my past, and then it was either my responsibility to be supportive the next day if he was mildly ashamed (but not apologetic), or it was my fault for "aggravating him" and causing him to say those things, or both. I'm so glad you escaped this cycle of shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/22 12:06 PM
339

I am crying laughing. He can't understand why naked dry humping didn't get her in the mood?!! Isn't this every woman's dream?! Having a dick rubbed against us aggressively?!?!?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/22 07:11 PM
31

Because this is part of his excuse to her later AND gets him out of buying a gift? Win win for the scrote.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/22 05:58 PM
103

I would say I can't wait for this but these are the guys who will end up shooting us for being happy single. Maybe they'll all die from eating Cheetos and living in a moldy basement? Here's hoping.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/22 03:09 PM
186

My God. This is incredible. The work stuff never occurred to me and it is genius!! I love asking about what they do on their days off. You're so right that this will be a blueprint for the relationship! I also pay attention to men who constantly talk about college years in their 30s. To me, this exhibits Peter Pan syndrome and these men are usually fixated on some college girlfriend bc she was a virgin. Adults don't talk about their college years extensively.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/22 03:07 AM
85

She is right. You have to tell him to stop and then collect the evidence. Luckily courts see this a lot, so if he continues even if the "texts are harmless" you can usually get him charged with harassment if not a full restraining order. I'm sorry you are dealing with this. Please don't be too proud to take this to the police. I waited too long and my ex slashed my tires. It took two full years of two restraining orders for him to leave me alone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/22 03:00 AM
18

Ugh where can we post a screen recording so we stop giving him views? I hate him. I'm so glad you weren't there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/22 01:23 AM
16

Oh my God. I am so sorry. I want to vomit at the "Guess I'm just hard to please." SIR. NO. Everyone reading this knows you are a queen and he is a troll and he should have been worshipping you for letting him share your space MUCH LESS your body. He sounds like the type of man who sits at home criticizing famous women's bodies. I hate him. I'm so sorry you endured this but hope you will never again even consider engaging with this type!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/22 12:03 AM
7

I loved this. Thank you for posting!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/22 11:53 PM
73

You phrased this so well. I can see how this translates into the bedroom now. If they must convince you that you're wrong about what brings you pleasure in the kitchen (instead of just cooking what you want) it seems likely they will do the same in bed. Yuck.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/22 11:30 PM
4

Thank you for this!! I agree. The man's video was a bit weird in the "be a man" and "don't be submissive" stuff. I get the point but I agree with you that the focus should be on being a better person- having virtues for their own sake.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/22 05:29 PM
208

This made me so angry but I DO appreciate the response pointing out that he is actually doing these repairs, landscaping, etc. to earn his keep. Simple math solves the inequity here. She can show him the actual cost of rent for her gorgeous property, and deduct the actual cost of the repairs he is doing, and have him pay the difference. It costs like $100 to repair a leaky faucet. I would love to see his surprised pikachu face when he realizes how much it costs to live in such a nice place!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/21 02:21 PM
3

And the always famous "You can trust me" or "I'm a good guy" LMAO
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/21 03:39 PM
11

Roleplaying provider I am crying 😂😂😂 This video made me want to scream
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/21 11:19 PM
29

Exactly this! Love that your vetting instincts are sharp!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/21 10:28 PM
62

I find those types of men easy to filter out with simple boundaries. I really enjoy dating with FDS, and the amount of effort I put in is minimal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/21 10:27 PM
7

Me too!! And of course this kind of dude would think that's a good thing 🤢🤢🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/21 09:42 PM
15

Yes. Exactly this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/21 09:35 PM
6

The PS is unnecessary. No one deserves that. I'm sorry.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 07:07 PM
85

He thinks "You know that you're gorgeous right?" is a compliment? It's a question...and it's weird and intrusive. A compliment is "Those earrings are so fun" or "I love the color you painted your nails" or "You handled that disgusting old man very professionally."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 06:50 PM
713

HE BLOCKED HIS OWN DAUGHTER OVER A DISAGREEMENT end of story the man is garbage
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 06:29 PM
110

First, congrats on finalizing divorce! Second, I know this gets said a lot on this sub, but it's true: HVM at all ages exist. The most important thing is to be healthy, happy, and confident- and to enjoy living your life as a single woman. The reason for this is simple. ONLY by loving yourself and your own life so much, are you in a position to truly vet men as HVM v LVM whether or not they "add lots of value" to your life. If you just want sex/companionship, a LVM will add value to your life, b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 06:27 PM
24

Wow. This is very well-written and thoughtful. Thank you for sharing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 01:48 PM
5

If you can't have an open conversation with him about how his behavior makes you feel, he's not your friend.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 01:46 PM
49

I love how we both have to give men we don't like a chance AND stop leading on men we aren't interested in. Double standard strikes again. Spare yourself the argument. Just say "You may choose to settle for dating someone you don't like. That's not my choice. And you don't get a say in my choices." End.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 01:44 PM
2

This is infuriating. I hope you asked for his $10 after that!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 01:36 PM
16

Is it somehow assumed that period sex is not a thing, or do you communicate this specifically as your preference? Ladies some of us want period sex lmao please stop feeding the myth
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 01:34 PM
45

Ok I love this! Thank you for sharing. He was truly funny and dry and I enjoyed his sarcasm. When he said "If you didn't cum, it's your fault" /s I laughed so hard!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/21 01:28 PM
38

I also love single men who have a man cave in their own home 🤡🤡🤡🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/21 04:41 PM
51

To me, this sounds like a control thing rather than an "adventurous spirit seeker." Seems like he is looking for someone with no boundaries or requirements for their time, so he can dominate them. I also think he was hoping you'd respond by "proving how adventurous you are" ie, putting yourself in danger without vetting. Please don't feel silly for giving men a chance. It costs very little to match, chat, block and move on. If his comments were hurtful to you, it might be time to take a break fr…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/21 04:38 PM
172

We shouldn't count. It's weird and bizarre and based on the male idea that women should be "pure." If a man asks this, I know he has strange ideas about women. BUT...I love the idea of only counting sex that leads to orgasm. That's the only thing we should be counting. Sorry, little man who didn't understand foreplay, you didn't make the list.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/12/21 01:38 PM
47

This is a great point!! We want everyone to level up- not pretend to be something they aren't!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/21 09:20 PM
50

Ok so- I have to say- at LEAST he says "thank you" and "I love you." Like, we all know of relationships like this where the man doesn't at least pretend to be grateful. Things I enjoyed the most: -Him shot playing video games and toys -Him saying he "doesn't care what others think" and yet excusing his sleeping around by saying other men want this, too (Thought you didn't care about others?) -His use of biology to say the dominant male sleeps with all the women! Sure, elephant seals do this. But…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/21 09:01 PM
30

Respectfully disagree. While it is a dating sub, it is a dating sub that prioritizes the rights and standards of women. Many posters are not dating but still post information about safety, leveling up, and other topics. I'd say this sub, run by women and for women, can still be feminist even if it is based around dating strategies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/21 01:36 PM
159

This makes me sick because it's so real. My brother carried the ring to propose to his wife for like, a week, and he was sick with anxiety because he wanted to do it so badly. A man carrying around a ring for this long just shows it is a prop for future control and not at all a romantic gesture. Thank you for posting this. Also- I'm so glad you got out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/21 01:34 PM
51

Wow this is very well done and deeply disturbing also. Thank you always for sharing your art!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/21 01:20 PM
104

I love Wallet Women! I know female gets used poorly by certain groups but what about Financially Free Females? I'm so happy you are doing this. Financial literacy is badly needed by so many!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/21 04:36 PM
16

This was deeply unsettling. Thank you for posting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/21 04:37 PM
4

This! And worse, having hundreds of pairs in mint condition in boxes. My ex had little baggies he would slip over his shoes when it rained to protect them. They are SHOES they are meant to protect YOU from the rain
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/21 04:17 PM
110

I think the key to it being a kink is that the woman doesn't want it? Once a woman is actually interested in becoming pregnant, the men consistently fail to perform due to pReSsUrE.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/21 09:37 AM
25

This! Like, if you're going to copy/paste, can you at least spellcheck??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/21 02:35 PM
94

How can I upvote this more??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/12/21 01:42 AM
-3

For me, there is so much more I want to discuss than makeup and fashion trends. I vet my friendships just like my relationships. High value men are rare but I absolutely have platonic male friendships that I value. I am in a male-dominated industry so to not hang out one-on-one with other men would deprive me of valuable networking opportunities. Listen to your gut, and vet, but yes, I do have friendships with HVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/21 11:45 AM
54

I love this forum for the zero-tolerance policy. I do think, if and only if he is respectful in all other ways and you feel his other behavior so far meets your standards, it's worth bringing it up once. I would just ask, point blank, "Can I ask why you don't hold doors open for women?" You can do this in a casual, friendly, and non-accusatory way. Just curious, right? And then whatever his answer, you can say, "I see it as a sign of respect." And leave it at that. If he opens doors from then ou…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/21 11:39 AM
17

Such a good point about it not being incurable! Or fatal. Sometimes even the best of us slip back into learned (bad) habits. We can recover again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/21 03:18 AM
54

If you ever write a book about your experiences I will be first in line to buy it. Please keep sharing knowledge with us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/21 03:17 AM
5

HAHAHA YES the lukewarm broccoli hotpocket NAILED IT. I like an occasional french fry too. But the gross pocket?! Not a single FDSer can argue this. Excellent analogy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/21 10:19 PM
14

Hilarious. I love her GENUINELY
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/21 04:25 AM
16

You're doing great work. Progress is never linear!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/21 02:26 AM
261

For those not familiar: The screenshot is a joke based on a Twitter thread. My favorite first date argument with a LVM was that it was rude for me to not let him walk me to my car. For context, he was going on and on during our date about how "unsafe" other countries are for women. I reminded him that in our own country, women are murdered on first dates, told to go out in groups, cautioned against walking/jogging at night. So at the end of our lovely date (/s) he offered to walk me "since I tol…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/12/21 01:27 PM
2

I disagree with your posting this here. Just because you have not had infections doesn't mean any of these things are necessary, and many of them are strongly opposed by actual doctors. Probiotics are not scientifically linked to anything other than gut health, and many people can't tolerate dairy. Your vagina cleans itself. It does not need soap/oil/steam. Having less hair is not in any way more sanitary. And seriously- vaginas are not supposed to "smell like roses" and trying to convince women…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/12/21 12:53 PM
218

I think she is confused about the meaning of "FOR SURE." I wonder if she is as SURE about marrying him as she is about changing her name (ie, not SURE at all.)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/21 08:21 PM
68

This is the most upsetting thing I have read on FDS. I am so sorry this happened to you. I simply can't fathom "convincing" someone they had an orgasm. I'm grateful you escaped and wish a lifetime of disappointment on that man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/21 04:10 PM
265

She is saying DEFINITELY NOT. You do not solve a lack of ambition by giving them a reward with no work! Are you kidding me?? Let me make a comparison for you. All love to all body types, first of all. But when a morbidly obese person wants gastric bypass surgery- what does the doctor do? Tell them to make healthier food choices and start getting more active, to lose some lbs on their own FIRST. Why? Because it is their habits that need to be adjusted in order to ensure higher chances of long-ter…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/21 04:03 PM
5

Wow. This comment. Dating beneath your capacity is a perfect way to phrase it!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/21 03:22 AM
37

Good reminder, thank you. I'm sorry this happened but appreciate your good humor about it. I know we are all grateful when they show their true colors sooner than later, and honestly, all of us have been there sis. Pop that shit online- who knows, maybe someone with the same initials/interests will give you something back for it?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/21 06:48 PM
164

Hey at least she communicated and she now knows they can "learn to romance EACH OTHER." 🤢 So obvious that instead of taking accountability for his behavior he blamed his mom's death and also her for not romancing him. Gross.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/21 10:53 PM
28

This comment is gold 😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/21 02:45 AM
12

This is incredible. My new daily prayer.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/21 02:46 AM
42

So well-written!!! Thank you for this. I feel the same way, that FDS is counteracting conditioning that was never meant to benefit me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/21 10:17 PM
85

Thank you for the post. It never occurred to me that they enforce their boundaries so blatantly while encroaching on ours. This is so helpful in reframing!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/21 10:11 PM
35

This!!!! I love this point!! As marriage rates decline more and more young men have to take care of themselves. What a tragedy. And seeing that women are the ones able to work, keep a house, and still write novels just makes the stronger case for many famous male authors having help with their work- from their spouse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/21 12:31 PM
155

This is another scrote myth like the wall. Men spread this to encourage women to be the pursuers. As has been mentioned on FDS, most men will accept attention and sex from a woman who pursues them even if they are not really interested. This does not benefit the woman in any way. That's why FDS recommends NOT asking men out. If he really wants to date you, he will find a way to ask you out. The rumor that women "can't handle rejection" is, as you say, easily shown to be true of men given the tho…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/21 12:21 PM
121

This is so triggering!!! Like, if you truly had something planned, my questions wouldn't bother you?! This type of logic is insane. Also the "I was going to apologize for calling you names last night but you were not nice to me this morning, therefore you don't deserve it." How have we all dated the same shitbags?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/21 12:13 PM
124

I don't understand your question. Militant? What is militant about having vetting standards? And there is no "balance" between being a pickme and being happy with yourself- it's about who you put first, so it's really one or the other. I don't think there is anything jaded about not wanting to waste time with men who don't add value to your life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/21 01:13 PM
51

Ok first of all- love yourself. That's who should make you feel loved. Second, he is your best friend? Really? Imagine how you would feel if someone talked about your best this way? Would you want your best friend to be someone's "good enough"? Would you want your best friend to be with someone who is with him because he is "the best they'll ever get"? I think the answer is, hell no. I'm glad he is nice to you but so are pets. We are responsible for providing for our pets. We don't wait on grown…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 02:51 AM
55

Best video on tiktok tbh. Thank you for this timely posting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/21 02:39 AM
101

Came here to say this!! I know it's frustrating but try and frame it like, maybe someday in the past, you would have had sex with one of these men and still been disappointed and exhausted but also deeply heartbroken. Weeding them out after a few dates kind of sucks. Finding out the truth three years in is devastating. This is the magic of FDS- the strategy is to shorten the timeframe of discovery.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 09:17 PM
13

This is definitely a matter of preference! I have a large photo of myself hung in my home. It's a picture I love, I look amazing, and I paid for this house so my decor choices are mine alone. I've never gotten anything but compliments on it from those folks who are trusted enough to be inside. My co-workers do not come into my home, nor do men I've gone on a few dates with. What's wrong with showing your 6 year old niece that it's perfectly fine to celebrate yourself? OP didn't indicate the pict…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 09:12 PM
62

LOL this. "Incels" except not necessarily celibate, and if we are, it's not involuntary. The dizzying logic of men who call us this. I also live the logic that says us having standards is the root cause of incels and not, you know, their shitty grooming and terrible eating habits and pornsick limp dicks and total lack of any interesting personality traits. Women are responsible for everything apparently but ALSO have no power.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 06:32 PM
33

This made me so angry also. How easy is it to say you are looking for a hookup?? I see it on guy's profiles all the time! NSA/FWB. Enough said. The fact that he tried to make it out like sex is the sole purpose of dating and SHE should know that made my blood boil. When he brought up tight outfits....my head exploded. I love that he kept saying she "spent all his money" and when she said she offered to pay half he was content to dismiss the truth by saying she didn't mean it. Men like this are d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 06:21 PM
-12

I agree with this and with OP! You make an excellent point about the importance of context. I think she may have been referencing men online or in casual public situations?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 06:13 PM
11

Thank you for posting this. I really enjoy the commenters you posted, making logical observation. His responses are shocking. In my experience, the "BAHAHAHA" response means that he was triggered. Him saying "she is going back to work in 2023 so she has plenty of time" and his scheduled reevaluation when the children turn 18 give me chills. What an absolute nightmare. I hope his wife does read his posts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 02:14 PM
29

I'm sorry for what happened to you. I'm so proud of you for opening up, for wanting to move forward, and for not letting the foamy scrotes get to you. You are doing great!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/21 09:58 PM
3

This is an amazing comment. Thank you for pointing this out. I see this a lot but never realized it's just escapism.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/21 09:48 PM
125

I am laughing my ass off at this. Imagine thinking your RIGHT TO CUM was a real thing and that this right is in danger because women want to enjoy sex. Your post literally says "tell them before sex." Do they even fucking read?? Bro. If a girl says she doesn't want you to cum and you feel triggered, walk away. I will literally never understand their pure rage at our ability to speak up for our pleasure? Thank you for posting. I love this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/21 02:27 PM
31

The lack of driving while still asking girls out aside, I would be so offended if a man sent this to me. Like...it feels like he has too many dates to keep it straight (gross) and then of course, the fact that all of these things could have been asked DURING CONVERSATION in a less impersonal way. This is an instant block move, for me. I am so disappointed that she found this to be a positive. Sis needs help.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/21 02:22 PM
29

I have been there!! I would suggest dating yourself. Take yourself out, buy yourself flowers, treat yourself with all the kindness and love you would show a partner. This helped me satisfy my dating itch and built my confidence, by reminding me what an amazing partner I can be AND how good it feels to be cared for.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/21 02:16 PM
82

My favorite part is if you return the honesty and they lose their shit. Obviously these scrotes aren't worth our time but back in my early recovering pickme days, I tried sending back the same energy. Want to bring up my weight? Let's talk about yours. Without fail they showed their insane double standard- honestly was only OK when it was them doing it to me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/21 02:12 PM
4

"Your boyfriend doesn't let you have friends?" "OMG he told me that creeps would say that! This has never happened. I can't wait to tell him!!!!" All smiles. I did this with a tattoo, innocently. My artist warned me that some creep would someday sexualize my tattoo. It's a ribbon. I got it anyway. The day it finally happened and some gross random weirdo said he "wanted to untie ie" I lit up with a huge smile and said "OMG MY tatto artist told me a creep would do this someday!" Hilarious bc it sh…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/21 02:51 AM
3

THIS. I see so much "former college athlete" BS on men's OLD profiles...when they are 35+. What the fuck.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/21 02:41 AM
1

This is incredibly helpful. Thank you!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/21 02:02 AM
6

Because they think we find our own value in being attractive to them 🤡 This is why they call FDS women "ugly" as though this comment will crush our souls.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/21 01:48 AM
38

This is an excellent point!!! I love this and will start doing it. Labeling the behavior rather than the person definitely will help me avoid getting attached and letting things slide.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/21 06:42 PM
56

So much this. Thank you for posting. I swipe hard left on OLD profiles that mention "pranks" or loving sarcasm, or wanting a "solid roast to flirt ratio." To me, all of these things are abuse in disguise. Maybe they appeal to some. I'm genuine and want the same in a partner.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/21 06:40 PM
101

"Was this fun?" "Heck yeah" 🤢 This was awful. Both extremely LV.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/21 05:36 AM
150

I know this is awful but I am cracking up because these men will all die alone. Single women thrive and live long, happy lives. Single men die younger and have a harder time making social connections. These idiots will keep "spinning plates" and then one day be the sad saps on Bumble at 50 with "Not sure yet" listed as what they are looking for, with "kids- someday" filled out as though their sperm hasn't turned to dust. Only then will they realize that the remaining single women who "cook, clea…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/21 01:39 AM
44

I'm super proud of you for reflecting on this experience and learning from it. I think you're being super hard on yourself! You mostly followed the FDS playbook while also being reasonable and listening to your gut. He turned out not to deserve you. For me, 6 made my fucking blood boil so please, allow me to state with FINALITY that you should definitely go for that position AND get your masters if you want. Otherwise I appreciate you sharing. Hindsight is always 20/20 but looking back definitel…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/21 06:40 PM
35

Hey!! This post is killing me. We've all fallen off at some time or another. Be kind to yourself. Be proud that you are recognizing now that this treatment is not acceptable. Many of us have been in relationships for years before we realized that we deserved better! Don't talk about your "last scrap of dignity and grace." So you feel like you showed your ass and accepted subpar treatment from a man? Today is a new day. Look in the mirror and say nice things, treat yourself to a massage or someth…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/21 06:32 PM
19

This is not unique to Muslim-American men. Read the book suggested by others- "Why does he do that" By Lundy Bancroft. It explains the thought processes of abusive men. What you need to understand is that this man did all of these things intentionally. You looking to place blame elsewhere (his parents, his upbringing, even your behavior) is exactly what he wants. At the end of the day, you have to realize that he is an adult who is choosing to behave this way. It's the only way you can heal. (An…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/21 04:25 PM
78

Big oof. I feel this hard. I am so sorry you went through that. I hope you are recovering well and giving yourself grace and forgiveness for those times. We were all lied to and manipulated into believing sex should be like that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/21 04:12 PM
11

This made me laugh so hard. It's so true and absolutely hysterical. Thank you for posting!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/21 04:27 PM
245

THIS. Or "she makes me feel....." or "she does X For me." This is a great screener when you are at the point of talking about previous relationships. If all he mentions are qualities that relate to him (she was a really good cook and kept the house clean) to me, this is just as much a red flag as "she was a psycho." Love a man who can say "She was intelligent and successful but we disagreed on our future and it didn't work out." END.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/21 04:33 PM
33

I agree! And I don't want to shame anyone. I will just chime in and say that when I truly started exploring my feelings, I honestly felt that I had been brainwashed into disliking my own body hair. So I am working really hard to undo that. I still shave at times and trim when I feel like it, but for the most part, I let it grow for long times (2-3 months.) I still panic when I go to a fancy event with stubble under my arms. But I take a deep breath, and tell myself it's natural, and I go. I have…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/21 01:43 PM
363

Honestly? Noticing that he never got out of bed when I did. It happened because I mentioned being tired and he said he had slept great. I just recall thinking...hmm.... I got out of bed at 5am and went to teach a class at the gym...got home at 8...walked the dog...didn't see you til after 9. Once I realized he was always sleeping in, I started noticing he never brushed his teeth before bed or in the morning, I started noticing the smell, I realized his underwear all had holes in them, I remember…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/21 01:27 PM
48

This is so real. Thank you for posting!! Have you had men like this you they would do better "if they had someone to do it for"? Aka, move in with me, I promise, I will magically be tidier. This is something so many of my NVXes have told me. Like...what a crock of shit. These were the same guys who wanted me (ASKED ME) to encourage them to eat healthier and workout (things I do normally) and then later flipped it back on me, saying I was always nagging and trying to change them. The pile of clea…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/21 01:22 AM
45

Yes! And they are socialized to blame any failures on others.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/21 01:16 AM
78

I'm so proud of you!! Concerned about your language though- you thought he was a HVM, but he wasn't. No extremely HVM would do this. I think it's an important point to make because at 4 months no man could have proven himself yet. Always vet, sisters! I hope you blocked and deleted him??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/21 01:12 AM
10

Oof. This. For what it's worth, I had all the texts printed out. He would call me a liar anyway. Or, even better, say that the printed words where he called me a whore in response to a question didn't matter...because his intention was to say X (something good) and my intention was to say Y (something bad.) Truly head spinning.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/21 03:53 AM
7

I am so sorry to all of this. I get this all to well and I an so glad you made it out!! Any recommendations on books/movies/resources to get out of this way of thinking?? Even after it's over I have a hard time really recognizing the abuse and how intentional it was. I still struggle to accept that it wasn't my fault like he always told me. I read Lundy's "Why does he do that." Any other suggestions?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/21 03:51 AM
16

You're so right on that. Honestly the bizarre thing about this post is- she was complaining to her friend, instead of talking to the man she claims she "talks to like a human." Like. What?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/21 01:43 AM
85

It's BiOlOgY (but only for men!!!!!!!!! Women do not have physical attraction or sexual urges!)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/21 01:39 AM
193

Came here to say this about them admitting it like it doesn't tell on them?!? I love that this guy told OP the story as though it was romantic to have a man settle for his current wife after he had a traumatic experience. I have also had men do this. It only makes them look like assholes especially when the wife is lovely, sweet, intelligent, and supportive. The "what could have been" kills me because for me, it's always some highschool/college relationship, again making it obvious that what the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/21 01:36 AM
36

I think both points are valid! In absence of him knowing you well, the cost of a date is a good barometer.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/21 01:30 AM
147

It's truly sad. They acknowledge they have nothing to offer a woman who is confident and happy. So they try to knock women down to make them think they can't do better. Honestly they're preying on the primal- fear and anger are "louder" than happiness- but once you recognize it for what it is (a weak man's attempt at kicking your legs out from under you) it's hilarious. Even slight negs are to be noted. Imagine saying shit like that to your friends? No fucking way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/21 01:27 AM
25

Thanks for sharing. Thought the video was funny and was thinking of following. Now I know he's a scrote. Ick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/21 01:24 AM
86

This was the first article I ever read by Dr Taylor. I think it may have been posted on here- more than a year ago. I so appreciate you posting this today. Not only is she a powerhouse and an incredible author but what an excellent vetting tool for us all. I sent this to the man I was dating last spring when I first read it. He lost his shit. He looked her up just to insult her (his exact words- what does a lesbian know about men) and that reaction told me everything. Ladies, if you have been da…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/21 06:06 PM
25

This. It's awful. There is even a sex advice columnist run by a porn star. I feel so sorry for everyone who writes in.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 07:29 PM
31

Ohhh my your comment is so true. My NVX used to claim that because he was willing to have a conversation about his bad behavior, I had no right to be upset anymore. Why are they like this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 07:28 PM
25

This is my favorite comment. Thank you. I'm also crying at the "must not have more than 8k in debt" what a great way to weed out ladies with student loans (educated) and mortgages (independent.) Just say you want someone easily manipulated and be done with it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 07:22 PM
18

Oof this comment. So many times I have responded to "educate" but you are so right on here. They know.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/10/21 08:06 PM
160

This hurts my heart. I hope the comments are kind to her. Who hasn't been there- asking for equality, which does require work? Being told they can't be bothered. Thank you for posting. Excellent reminder that we should vet hard and be relentless in our standards. Being alone is always preferable to being with a man who will say "We never go on bikerides" after you just birthed a fucking child.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/10/21 03:30 PM
28

Ughhh the later, drunken tirades. I have so been there. My favorite part of these was the next morning, long after I had been up and worked out and deleted the bs- he'd message "Sorry I got carried away" ALWAYS followed by "but..." and then a list of reasons he justified it to himself. Also took me too long to stop replying and he ended up blocking me 😂 The tragedy!! This was pre-FDS and honestly this sub has helped me so much in understanding how I could have recognized the red flags much soone…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 04:02 PM
4

This was such an insightful analysis. Thank you for posting this. I understand so many past experiences now and damn you are right. The whole "slut just for me" thing is...so....insane.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/21 02:19 PM
348

I am crying. Your analysis SO on point. Wanted to chime in: 80% casual- because I will never take you on dates. 20% formal- for times when I am invited to family weddings and you will attend as my date. Costumes in bed- specifically, little girl costumes. PG13 with everyone else- I expect you to be a virgin R-XXX with me- a kinky virgin!!! That exists!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 07:34 PM
149

And less disease...no chance of getting pregnant...no risk or violence....boy they really don't understand risk vs reward do they??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 02:08 PM
89

I am speechless. Also- are we all imagining how the tone of this would be different if the roles were reversed? If he was the earner, and his wife wanted to keep an inheritance separate?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 02:04 PM
32

Sex from your brother, I hope? Bad enough when they want sex for favors FOR US. Now it's a family thing?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 12:24 PM
20

No. I experienced this also. When I asked if everyone in that career had the same problem, or if he had tried any stress relief strategies, the answers were always that I simply didn't understand. I mean. How could I possibly understand stress?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 12:22 PM
54

But like. Sneakers?! Has anyone seen resale prices on Nikes?! My ex sold a pair for $1500. Men's sneakers. It doesn't excuse the comment - or any of these comments, honestly makes my blood boil- but men who pretend that all women spend thousands on shoes while men have one pair of $10 walmart flipflops are just telling on themselves. You can buy men's designer clothes. They sell men's luxury watches. I know you can't logic a troll but DAMNIT.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 02:37 PM
16

Came here for the comments. You made my whole week with this one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 02:04 AM
53

40% of the victims of domestic violence are men...they're just not reporting it? I um...I don't think so. Lundy Bancroft does a great job dismantling this lie. He says that much of domestic violence isn't "reported," so much as called in by neighbors! So. If that many men were being abused, we would know. I'm not saying men aren't the victims. I'm disputing the statistic of 40%. Good article other than a few eye-rolling exaggerated statistics.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 11:35 PM
50

This is my favorite! They always want to dictate a standard of behavior for us that they are not bound to follow. The guys who scream the loudest about equality in 50-50 are the ones who blatantly expect women to change for them, to accommodate them, to do all of the emotional labor, to do all of the housework, and will crow at the top of their lungs that men are visual creatures while women are actually attracted to fat disgusting losers. I love that he went to such lengths to tell you how bad …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 12:38 PM
3

I am so trying to un-brainwash myself about shaving. I still panic when my underarms are hairy and I am teaching a fitness class...but I talk myself through it. We have hair. It's normal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 10:23 PM
4

Omg I never realized this and it is crushing and accurate
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 10:18 PM
9

I loved watching this. So many good points!!! Thank you for sharing!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 09:48 PM
9

You can change your last name without getting married! I hated mine. Changed it. Cost me like $200 bucks and a morning at the courthouse. Felt amazing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 02:12 AM
125

The black market is for GOOD sperm. Not these fuckers posting about wahhhhmen. Healthy, handsome, educated men's sperm is in higher demand than usual because: -Sperm banks get a lot of donations from young college men and college campuses were shut down for a year -Many married men have infertility issues -Lots of women are starting to make a baby without a partner (I read a lot about it because I was also thinking of having a baby without a partner. Now is not the time. There are gross men who …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 01:55 AM
258

This is such a great tactic for encouraging women and vetting LV people!!! Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 02:53 PM
75

I TOTALLY agree that he drives her to this explosion in this scene. He wants her to move to Paris with him but not "expect anything." Are you insane?! This show drives me crazy now that I have FDS-thinking but I can definitely see how Big manipulates her. He knows what she wants and whenever she seems happy, he tries to swoop in and say he misses her just to get sex and leave again. He is a total loser IMO and I honestly got so angry watching this. She should have thrown the food in his face. An…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 02:52 PM
75

Exactly!!!!! Meanwhile she should be in perfect shape with flawless makeup and hair, great clothes, smooth legs and underarms, and absolutely no standards. This is why FDS makes them rabid. How dare we ask for a man who grooms?!?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 05:03 PM
71

Came here to mention that quote. They literally admit that they know the majority of these women were trafficked and THEN try to act like this victim status doesn't save them from becoming subhuman for selling sex. Which these men are buying. God this made me so ill!!!!! This is the entire incel mythology that lots of sex "ruins" you but only if you're a woman.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 04:54 PM
9

That sentence also made me physically ill.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 09:21 PM
15

This is so true and devastating. Thank you for enlightening me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 09:15 PM
5

Yet another thing FDS has (thankfully) ruined for me. It was a giant squid and I used to love that episode. And that show. But you're totally right! He is a terrible person and she enables him. Not surprising, given the creator.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 08:50 PM
18

"He banged her because she was available. Not because she was irresistible." I needed to read this. Thank you. Feels like I was socialized to give sex to men who made me feel "irresistible" and you're so right with this comment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 01:26 PM
2

I am crying. The "opportunity" to walk to his place and hook up and then do that regularly with no strings or any real dating? What a dream /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 01:15 PM
26

Omg. Your comment about lovebombing being cookie cutter is SO on point!! I never noticed it before. Looking back it's obvious that the dinners, gifts, etc from my narcissistic ex had nothing to do with me and my taste. Thank you so much for opening my eyes to this!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 12:02 AM
39

Crying at this. Nailed it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/21 12:48 PM
3

I want to upvote this a hundred more times. Hear fucking hear!!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/21 06:15 PM
11

It's Carl from Aqua Teen for me (heurs!)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/21 06:11 PM
5

Noooooooooooooooooo that response makes me see red please make it go away
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/21 06:06 PM
46

All of this. The entitlement. When he said "we had a date, she cared for my hand, we made love" I was wondering if that's because during that date he actually paid attention to her, maybe showered?! Men love to talk about how we changed without accepting that they have given up. My ex loved to make dramatic statements about "the love we had is gone" when I called him out on his BS. Idiots. I'm hoping she took out the 10k for an attorney.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/21 06:03 PM
2

The first one made me physically ill. "Total closet freak" aka my friends have never seen me with a woman "Tall with a thin build" aka bird legs, soft belly, 5'9 "Live in the City" aka rents a room from another sad dude "Quarantining down in the south shore" aka living with his parents bc he lost his job as a linecook before covid bc he sexually harassed a young hostess "Very chill and laid back" aka will 100% hit you during sex and then cry later and blame you "Raw Kinky Bareback Fucking" aka h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/21 05:57 PM
62

I love her so much but hate the way they chose to end the article! Why does it always have to come back to a man? Just let her celebrate herself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/21 05:44 PM
16

Or "Well you made me feel bad by doing x" to justify their bad behavior...even though they never mentioned X being a problem. This was my classic NVX tactic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/21 05:42 PM
6

This was my thought too. He is literally profiting off of her goodwill. Disgusting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/21 05:40 PM
5

Same girl. This got me. Hard.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 11:43 PM
28

THIS!!!!!!! He wants a woman who will meticulously plan her grooming needs around his lifestyle without ever inconveniencing him (or growing body hair.)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 11:20 PM
28

Came here to say this about "females." Big yuck.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 11:17 PM
14

This is so accurate and also hilarious
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 11:15 PM
37

FDS Bumble- omg. I need this. Verifiably recent photos, background checks, references....can you imagine?! You must complete your profile in full before becoming active. Any gross behavior gets you banned for life. In order to set up a profile you have to answer screening questions like, What's your ideal partner? What do you think about (insert celebrity sex offender)? Describe your last relationship and why it ended. Y'all I would pay so much for this...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 02:43 AM
14

So much of this. Your comment nails it. Imagine doing this once. I'd never drink again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/04/21 02:25 PM
44

Oh no....I loved Wayne's World but holy shit you are right. He is a lazy tool who tries to ruin his hot girlfriend's chance at a great career because he is insecure....another film - FDS ruined. Thank you for pointing this out. It hurts but it's so important.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/04/21 02:23 PM
75

WOW. Screenshotted for future use in work group chats. Thank you for sharing this powerful thought.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/04/21 02:50 AM
2

Excellent point. And tragic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/21 05:43 PM
2

You didn't cause anything. I promise you. People drink because they WANT to. They smoke and do drugs because they CHOOSE to. If you were truly and fully responsible for his actions, he would have been just like you. He would have been kind and caring- as you are. You did not put him in the kind of stressful and nightmarish situation that causes you to lie once. If you had, he would have acted out and then come clean, apologized, and changed his behavior. You have to recognize that each of us is …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/21 05:43 PM
3

So glad to be a part of this community of intelligent, thoughtful, supportive women 💕
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/21 05:36 PM
12

Thank you so much for posting this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/21 01:07 AM
4

I don't advocate waiting until marriage. I simply stated that you can vet for stamina and other qualities important to a healthy sex life, without having sex. Then you called me a virgin. Not really a logical response to my comment, since in order to know that these other methods do translate to better sex in the end, I wouldn't be one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 06:08 PM
5

This is what FDS recommends- a subreddit discussing strategies for dating and not sleeping with men before they commit. Maybe you're on the wrong sub? Also, women generally support other women here. Just FYI.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 05:45 PM
11

Yes but you can vet for stamina and "compatibility" without sex- kissing, touching, other things. Paying attention to how a man uses his hands (massages, etc) and how attentive he is to your needs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 02:47 PM
6

This is the best comment. Bet he talks down to his doll, too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 02:45 PM
3

Thank you for posting. It's hard to change habits that are deeply ingrained and the tough love is always appreciated.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 02:43 PM
13

This is genius. Also the 25 thing. Our brains aren't fully formed until our mid-20s. So they literally want to trap us before we can think rationally. Terrifying.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 02:40 PM
6

THIS LIST is so incredible. Thank you for making the projection so obvious. I have experienced many of these and you just opened my eyes. Love this sub so much. Thank you sis!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 02:35 PM
30

Hey she's 25 and clearly made this video to educate other women! Nothing catering to the male gaze, just solid and helpful advice for other women to settle! "Feel free to experiment without getting off." I love it. /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 02:31 PM
7

Galian84, I am so sorry you went through this. I hope you realize that all of his issues have nothing to do with you. It hurts my heart that you tried to hard to accomodate and help him. You sound like a very kind person with a good heart. I'm glad you have your mom to support you and that your girlfriends welcomed you back in their lives. Stay strong, don't fall for his shit, and keep moving forward. Keep a list of the ten worst things he did or said and if you ever miss him, look at it. I am s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 02:25 PM
11

Thank you for sharing this. Our bodies are our own and the choices we make only help us grow. My last NV ex would scream and cry asking for my "body count" because I made the mistake of sharing stories from my past. He hated that I wasn't ashamed of myself. Trash man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 02:10 PM
20

This comment!!!!! Low maintenance but gorgeous, why is this tiktok giving me incel vibes?? Also why is he so obsessed with "real eyebrows" like what...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 02:06 PM
44

I know. Why is she sharing this story? I would be mortified.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 02:04 PM
176

THIS. Also....his clothes are in there too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 02:02 PM
54

I love this. For me it's the opposite- I always felt I couldn't wear a 2 piece because my stomach is not flat. It's been fun to embrace that I want to wear a bikini for myself, because I like a tan on my little pooch!! Breaking out of making choices someone else made for us is empowering, no matter where it ends up. I bet your one-piece looks incredible!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/04/21 03:39 PM
2

Thank you for sharing!!! Just followed and she is amazing!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/21 05:25 PM
21

Love you for this. Women helping women warms my heart.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/21 05:11 PM
15

You described this so eloquently. I love it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/21 05:09 PM
2

I want to upvote this 1,000 times!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/21 05:06 PM
3

Lol ok I love this comment because you're right and am also dying because none of us would ever want that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/21 05:00 PM
20

THIS. Men with the right kind of experience (wisdom, maturity, etc) want to date their equal- ie, strong, intelligent, age-appropriate women. Because a partner is more than a tight ass. It's someone you can talk to and grow with. I have to explain this too often to LV friends. Anyone who thinks a young woman is the "ideal partner" is telling on themselves and their priorities.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/21 04:59 PM
3

Came here to say this. When they start to distort the concept of fairness, run. "Fair" would be either her contributing to bills (electric, groceries, etc) OR helping with the mortgage in exchange for equity. Her existing property bears no relevance. I love that the advice started with the suggestion of her leaving.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/21 04:54 PM
63

He was a classic LVM. After the chess game in book one, I can't think of a single thing he did that showed value. Honestly the best thing about him was his mother and he gets zero credit for that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/21 03:08 PM
40

Because the men making these movies are desperate to indoctrinate women that this is how it works. "SEE?!? He can get HER with bare minimum effort. YOU SHOULD LOWER YOUR STANDARDS." Honestly FDS has ruined so many movies for me and I am grateful for it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/21 03:06 PM
2

WHAT!!! I was positive he was 20s or 30s. It's the "used to have respect for (I know you don't believe that because I didn't show it but I am telling you nowwwww)" for me. This whole message screams child. I'm so sorry this garbage showed up in your inbox.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/21 01:29 AM
2

This comment gave me life
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/21 01:21 AM
3

The boomerang penis 😂😂😂 I cannot!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/21 01:18 AM
6

THIS!!!! Also. With just the simplest of Google searches, I found the opposite data. That men raised by their mothers tend to be more empathetic. I can't help myself. Anytime some jack ass quotes a study, I will find the data, damnit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/04/21 09:35 PM
14

There is a strong possibility she is selling additional content on top of her subscriptions. But I agree! Even then, the math just doesn't add up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/04/21 09:24 PM
13

This hit way too hard. I never realized this tactic was a tactic. Thank you and also ouch.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/04/21 06:57 PM
14

I am so sorry you went through this and so glad he is out of your life. He sounds absolutely disgusting!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/04/21 04:19 PM
13

The article and your response to it were equally poignant. Thank you for the visual of leaking out our energy. Very powerful!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/04/21 03:42 AM
15

Thank you for sharing. This hurts because it's so accurate. I am a serial re-reader. Thank you for the reminder that I am just renewing the addiction every time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/21 02:37 PM
3

This was a great watch. Thank you for sharing!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/21 02:22 PM
29

UGH this!! And yet the same men who love "natural" will absolutely vomit if you have natural armpit stubble.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/03/21 11:57 PM
15

And even if he does!!!! As though that excuses his inability to feed the dog. This article made me sick. This woman needs better friends telling her to run.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 12:04 AM
151

Came here to say this. I love hearing controlled rage from men when other men say misogynistic shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/21 03:20 PM
5

Thanks I hated it. "It may break things accidentally in its passion for life" this man is an abuser 100%
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 06:20 PM
15

Both of these are terrible and I am so sorry! I hope your ex-husband gets an extra stitch of misery in his life. Or seven.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 02:41 PM
18

Honestly this. So much this. If you're horny, handle it. And to OP- if you just crave human touch, get a massage. Hug your family. Pet a dog. These things will help. As for the drinking, I agree it's hard to totally quit but find that moderation helps me control myself. Also, go out with trusted friends who won't let you leave with a man! Or make out with one. My biggest piece of advice would be to avoid the triggers. If you find that getting tipsy in public and talking to strangers leads to sit…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 02:22 PM
38

You know I did and it was all hot garbage.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 05:25 AM
21

Love when they show their IQ
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 03:21 AM
113

Thank you SO MUCH for posting this. I just started no contact and have been shocked that all texts/calls/emails have been about him and what he needs. Seeing your letter just solidified it for me. This behavior is so fucking unattractive. I hope you are going to burn it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 01:20 AM
8

I’m so sorry but so glad you leveled up and don’t worry- he will never get the likes of you again!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 10:38 PM
4

This response is everything!! So fucking true.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 10:37 PM
7

Thank you and I hope so too!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 10:28 PM
14

I agree. He had so many incel memes on his phone. Lesson learned.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 10:26 PM
14

Thank you. I love being here and I am so glad we are both in recovery 💕
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 10:26 PM
159

These physically hurt me. My NVM ex was always saying shit about how “scientifically” more partners meant that your vagina would be looser. He constantly compared me to his “virgin” ex and talked about how tight she was. I am ASHAMED my pickme ass discussed with him how her anatomy was different than mine independent of sexual history. I tried logical conversations (what’s the difference between sex 1,000 times with one partner vs sex once with 1,000 partners?) I sent scientific articles, I expl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 04:16 PM
49

I kept thinking he was going to make an actual point 🗑
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 03:06 AM
2

But hE iS kNoWlEdGeAbLe AbOuT eCoNoMiCs....what do we bet he keeps a large sum of money under his mattress and considers that being fIsCaLlY rEsPoNsIbLe.....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 11:14 PM
3

I love this. $20 says by “great sex” he means that he always gets off and she doesn’t “make him try.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 09:32 PM
2

I agree. And of course I doubt he listened to her response (bc it doesn’t satisfy his penis!!) but I loved it all the same.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 09:30 PM
20

This was so helpful. Thank you for sharing! It hurts to read it and become so aware that all the pain in that cycle could have been avoided. But knowledge is power.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 05:07 AM
51

SO MUCH THIS. You nailed it. I love to talk about philosophy but ANY MAN I matched with on OLD who had “deep conversation” or “philosophy” in his profile was 100% stupid AND convinced he knew everything. I had to screenshot this because I love how men online always complain their wives aren’t hot enough...and here we have a man complaining that his hot wife isn’t “intellectual” enough. I agree that she likely does have hobbies and interests but since they don’t mirror his, he dismisses them...wh…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 07:47 PM
62

No way is he smarter than you! He was an idiot and took advantage of your kindness. You leveled up- he was just a free course in identifying losers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 07:43 PM
69

You’re so right. I love when they tell on themselves. I hope this woman escapes him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 07:41 PM
4

YES! My paddle board was one of the best purchases ever!! It can be exercise or R&R. Nothing more relaxing than laying out on the lake. I love tanning in tiny bathing suits but hate laying out for men to “walk by” and gander. On a board, you can lay out, and if anyone gets too close- whoosh, paddle away. I hope your roller blading goes wonderfully!! I just bought skates but I am so nervous to get on them. Has been years since I skated!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 05:16 PM
6

I will NEVER NOT LOVE THIS
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 01:36 PM
6

SAME. Why were we allowed to watch it?! You just brought it all rushing back. And the scene where the wall curtains are attached to his head and they pull back as he moves forward. Idk why that terrified me so much...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 01:34 PM
27

THIS!!! I hated my curtains and got the film instead and love it. I uhhh...would also consider putting a cardboard cutout in your window that looks like a person- behind the film, all they’d see is shadow. You could make it look large enough to be a man and move it around. I’d also block his number, if I were you. Tell him you are getting a new number if you need to keep things civil, and recommend he email you if he needs something. He shouldn’t be free to text you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 05:20 PM
111

My EXACT progression....why would you build a loft bad and not build stairs or a ladder as part of the bed?!?!?!?!?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 06:57 PM
10

Thanks for this, lovely.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 03:58 PM
14

I love that you thanked him for the water. 15 minutes is more than enough of that and I’m so glad you escaped!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 03:56 PM
27

This made me spit out my coffee. I feel like this sums up OLD so well. Like....why would you DO that and then even more why would you SHARE that....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 03:48 PM
10

That article made me gag. I had never seen it. My “favorite” was where he showed pictures of women “improving their looks.” I completely agree with your point- that his article should go both ways!! But I resent the shit out of the idea that it’s my obligation to present well. I know this is a social construct and I also hate that it doesn’t apply to men. I delight in going to the store in baggy sweats with unkempt hair and shaggy armpits and absolutely no hint of a smile- and I had to train mys…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 03:35 PM
12

Which they will probs do anyway. At least we’re not settling anymore so most of them will fail to reproduce!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 03:29 PM
24

So proud of you!!!! I hope you are taking this time to focus on yourself, and starting to appreciate how much better your life is without him dragging you down. Every day will give you new opportunities to smile and to love yourself. Keep on leveling up!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 03:27 PM
4

I adore you. I also adore imagining a man saying this to me. I would literally die laughing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 12:46 AM
8

For what it’s worth, I recorded a conversation with my ex for this exact reason and when I brought it up as evidence he IMMEDIATELY changed tactic from “I never said that” to “I can’t trust you because you recorded me.” It’s truly mind-boggling when you see their defensiveness defy all logic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 09:49 PM
47

You called it on the fixation with being “denied” sex in highschool. I have known so many men like this. I’m also tired of men not understanding the gist of an apology. An apology is supposed to be an admission of wrongdoing, acceptance of accountability, acknowledgement of and regret for the pain caused to others, a promise to change and not repeat the action, and an expression of willingness to make amends and ALSO an understanding that it may not be possible to do so. Justin Timberlake’s apol…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 01:41 PM
160

We’re not giving undeserving men attention - I am crying THIS WAS PERFECT
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 05:21 AM
19

HAHA this!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 07:29 PM
14

I seriously started to offer some but. You know. FDS says not to teach them how to hide their scrote-ness. But boy did I want to suggest he take out everything and just put “man wants sex from woman.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/21 08:01 PM
2

Best comment
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/21 08:00 PM
22

Of course not!!! HE IS DECENT!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/21 08:00 PM
9

100%! They are always entertaining but this one took the cake for me. Literally nothing but flags.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/21 08:00 PM
56

Your comment made me laugh and your username is BOSS
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/21 07:58 PM
30

This was my thought too!!! He thought the conversation was amazing. Surely his being ghosted is just fIcKlE wOmEn.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/21 07:57 PM
321

LADIES. He is a DECENT HUMAN BEING. Line up!! Possibility of a free meal in exchange for your time engaging this fantastic specimen in conversation
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/21 04:21 PM
45

I know, right?? This could have gone so much differently. And better. But of course, the focus is on him accepting what he deserves and not becoming a better partner. I have dated this guy. Gross.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/21 01:39 PM
16

Am I the only one that thinks both of these men are living in a fantasy world? Hangover advice aside, human teeth marks are very distinctive...if he really had been bitten by one of his “conquests” then I doubt he would be able to pass it off. I’d say they’re both virgins, and that neither of them workout.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/21 06:53 PM
29

Ask yourself what value he ever brought into your life? Aside from the attention. Was the sex even that good? You describe him as nice and geeky. That really doesn’t differentiate him from thousands of other men. I’m sorry he hurt your feelings. The only person making him relevant to your life today is you. Daydream about someone else, someone who will have better qualities than “nice and geeky.” Better yet, get yourself a good vibrator and make a vision board for your brightest future and reali…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/21 02:28 AM
10

Thank you for posting this!! You pointed out an issue I’ve experienced but couldn’t express so well. So disgusting when a man eats clean but fills his head with garbage. And they usually hide it for some time. I know this is why we vet!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/21 08:08 PM
6

I love this post so much! Thank you for sharing and congratulations on doing the work, and loving yourself along the way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/21 12:10 AM
30

Your response is totally logical. She likely won’t get the message even with this comparison. She’ll probably say that many men masturbate to women who “look like” children and “consensual non-consent is something two adults can agree to” bUt ThEy’Re NoT hUrTiNg AnYoNe... I love the FDS response to her. She is fucking sick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/21 05:11 PM
49

Thanks I hate it
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/21 05:01 PM
8

And therapist!!!! It is always our responsibility to take those punches, serve them dinner and do the dishes, and ALSO put in all the emotional labor and constantly lift them up while they do the absolute bare minimum.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/21 04:43 PM
7

Nothing better than building muscles to intimidate LVM! Rock on with your workout. I’ll be doing the same.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/02/21 01:15 AM
5

This is excellent! Thank you for the list
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/21 04:29 AM
18

I think his question tells us the problem, though. He is clearly interested in trolling young women and flaunting his “wealth” to get sex. Which is why he needs to “protect” that asset from the women he will be baiting with it. He most definitely will not be taking the advice- which would net him an insecure pickme, but unlikely a supermodel (which he feels he deserves by his great virtues listed like....being single? Not having children?) Both of these dudes are clearly not interested in confid…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/21 04:16 AM
88

I am crying. Accurate as fuck. Nor have they been in a relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/21 02:52 AM
15

Please repost the link- I need this!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/21 02:51 AM
64

Your title had me rolling. So glad we can come to this safe space and agree that wiping your ass is not optional.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/02/21 02:50 AM
3

YES I love her thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/21 04:20 PM
14

He is probably upset because his last “girl” asked him super nicely to maybe wash his ass once in a while.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/21 04:10 PM
10

I agree with others than this post is pickme but love you for adjusting the statistical part of it!! I feel like I should add that not all women are straight, and not all straight women want a partner.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/21 04:40 PM
2

I’ve been there. I’m sorry he keeps showing up. I am so proud of you for holding the line, enforcing your boundaries, and focusing on you. Breaking the hold is like breaking any addiction. It’s messy and painful but so worth it. You can do this!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/21 04:26 PM
1

Hey- checking on you. How’s it going? Is he gone for good- I hope??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/21 03:24 AM
1

That’s a difficult statement to quantify. Are you saying it makes more sense to buy a home than get an education? As for whether homeownership is truly a better deal than rent, that depends on your interest rate, how much you put down, and what area you’re in. Interest is “burned” just like rent. And the costs of homeownership can eat through your equity quickly. What I’m saying is, in financial planning, rarely is there a simple solution for everyone beyond save money and contribute to retireme…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/21 03:17 AM
40

I know FDS says to ignore, block, and delete. But this takedown was so epic! She’s got me taking notes!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/21 09:07 PM
1

Omg. Pictures with exotic animals! Why would you even do this??? It’s usually cruel to the animals, because these are normally taken from some roadside attraction type of thing. No thanks. My other favorite was the guy who had a picture of him with a dog, which I am normally good with… but he didn’t have a dog. He said “I just want to show people that I like dogs.“
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/21 07:37 PM
6

I use fragrance-free detergent due to allergies. My ex, after asking how he could show me he cared, bought one that I am allergic to (because it had bEtTeR rEvIeWs On AmAzOn and apparently reviewers know more about what I need) and then once he got the detergent I use, he would loudly tell me he had washed his sheets and towels FOR ME on the few occasions he remembered. Sir. You should be doing that ANYWAY but a gesture is not thoughtful when you make a big deal out of it. All my past serious bo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/21 05:07 PM
20

“I don’t know why I keep trying” Neither do we.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/21 04:03 PM
14

If he doesn’t want a woman with ACCESS TO birth control....does that mean he is seeking someone from a country with restrictive laws against women’s health? A child, perhaps? This man should be arrested.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/21 04:00 PM
1

@jamberee13 on Twitter looks like the source- she posted this prior to any other posts I have seen. She never seems to get credit and is an actual riot.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/21 08:16 PM
28

Get up early, get in a badass workout, take a long walk, make a healthy lunch, do things that bring me joy (organize my space, clean, practice yoga, donate things I don’t need), and then a long hot bath with a good book and a facemask. No man could ever give me the joy I give myself in making healthy choices!! Think about what makes you the happiest and do that!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/21 08:10 PM
5

Anyone who preaches a “one size fits all” financial plan cannot truly help anyone. We all have different goals and resources and priorities. Some general advice is ok- save money, contribute to a retirement plan- but he is so smug and self-assured and it concerns me that he touts himself as an expert. The only expert on your financial situation is you. If you want personalized and useful advice, find a financial advisor with whom you have a good relationship. Shop around! Ask questions! Vet them…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/21 01:52 AM
5

I appreciate this insight and I do this too but want to add that things like stress and sleep, which are sometimes out of my control, can throw me right back into a painful period cycle, even if I make the best decisions. Physical therapy made a huge difference for me as well. Those of us with muscular asymmetry may suffer from painful periods, and pelvic physical therapy can help a lot. But at the end of the day, if you do everything suggested and still have a month where your period is painful…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/21 01:49 AM
20

And then we’re called whores for not fucking them 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/21 03:38 AM
15

I love this comment. Wanted to add that a real HVM will not be terrified by you. He will be engaged and curious and looking for who you are inside. From the words of this post, you are very thoughtful and intelligent and supportive of your sisters here. Empathy is priceless. Any man who is “terrified” that you made aesthetic choices in the past is shallow and therefore, NOT high value. Keep rockin queen!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/21 04:25 AM
14

“I love that connection and I love that they consider me ‘one of them.’ “ I am disgusted. When have you ever heard a female leader talk about how the admiration and acceptance of her mentees gets her off?! This man is a fucking menace. I pity his wife- whose love and children do nothing to excite this bitter, fat, greey old man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/21 06:10 PM
7

I loved that. And also her saying it is pedophilic and rapey. IT IS. Go to therapy is right!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/21 06:04 PM
126

This!!!!!! If it was “innocent,” he would stop at the first suggestion that it is inappropriate. Not dig in! Especially when the negative reaction is coming from the mother who had her for 13 years before he was in the picture!! I am horrified that the mom is not explaining to her daughter why this behavior is not OK.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/21 05:56 PM
106

These girls are talented and funny and I love this. Thank you for sharing!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/21 05:52 PM
54

This is like an island paradise surrounded by alligators. Thank you mods for always chuckin the gators back into the swamp where they belong.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/21 03:23 AM
6

Ok so I LOVE this list- y’all are amazing. Wanted to add mine. This is something I do when interviewing candidates for a job. But the same principle applies to dating, I think. Just ask someone “what’s your story!” What they choose to focus on will tell you so much!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 08:19 PM
19

I love this comment. Also… Do we really believe he is only 210? 40 lbs is a lot but it sounds like he is truly disgusting to her. It’s amazing to me that he only talks about his depression in losing a child. As though it was just his. I hate this man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 08:08 PM
19

Oh noooo. The Instagram guy looking for models! This is such a painful trope. So glad you blocked and deleted!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 07:57 PM
27

I totally agree. I felt like her ending was appropriate though. She made revenge her life. All of us know why “block and delete” is an FDS principle- because getting on their level and wasting your time costs you something. Yes, she got him arrested. Yes, you can paragraph a LVM and maybe get him to see the light on something. But. At what cost? I loved this movie but it was way too close to home and painful. Still. She was a flawed icon and I cried when they just burned her like trash.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 03:00 AM
6

Chiming in on recommendation. I bought the air pulse after reading another thread on FDS and...wow. Never have I ever!!! That thing is just fan fucking tastic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 02:57 AM
43

So much this!! Their odors are MANLY and worthy of admiration. Our life-creating, self-cleaning vaginas must be put in their place. With toxins and surgery. This ad hurt my soul.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 02:54 AM
25

It’s the “Queen” for me
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 02:52 AM
83

I did. Extra cringe. I admit I have been there. Saying I love you as they walk away. Thank God for FDS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 02:49 AM
3

Cackling at this!!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/21 05:51 PM
17

I love this!! I did the same thing. Except I also listed all of the things I had accomplished in the last year. Maybe that was petty of me 😇
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/21 05:48 PM
146

Coffee and a nice walk 🥸You tried, good riddance!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 07:33 PM
25

This is so true and so fucked. Double standards making my head spin.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 06:49 PM
44

Yes we will “settle” for living our best lives without a senior boyfriend skid-marking up the place. Yuck.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/21 11:20 PM
117

My head just exploded
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/01/21 03:38 AM
14

The end was THE BEST. Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/21 06:34 AM
111

100% of these men think that women should pay for half of everything. Their logic is that women SHOULD have to work harder for less money in demeaning careers AND pay half AND clean the skid marks out of their man’a jeans because wiping your ass is gay. I am so glad women are able to live independently because these dudes will all die younger and grosser and alone while we are living long, healthy, happy loves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/21 06:09 AM
7

This is....so low. I am so sorry you didn’t get real care but glad he showed himself to be a garbage man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/21 11:03 PM
31

But after he slapped her, he expressed genuine concern via text! Says the father. With a straight face. This thread also made me ill. She told him she asked for it and he...accepted her response. No chance she was groomed or told to say that? Yikes. This man should not parent.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/21 10:51 PM
8

Any recommendations on where to find this stuff? I could only find the AskTrp sub and that was nightmarish but not helpful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/21 03:04 PM
108

My favorite is when a man tries to tell me how I feel. Like...undoubtedly I am the expert on my own feelings. But no. The audacity knows no bounds.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/21 02:38 PM
6

Thank you for posting this. Interesting to see the breakdown.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/21 02:36 AM
12

YES this one made me cackle
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/21 02:25 AM
1

Can we talk about her sweater though?!?!?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/20 08:34 PM
1

RX breakup! I just downloaded it. It looks promising though basic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/20 07:33 AM
4

This post was awesome- I am so glad you did it!! And also. I love your hobby. What a gorgeous and special thing to do by yourself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/20 07:28 AM
3

This was incredible. I didn’t realize my ex did all these things until I saw them. I hope your No Contact goes well and safe and that you are rebuilding self love!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/20 07:09 AM
3

THIS. He is not against equality but doesn’t support a movement centered on equality. My eyes rolled so hard I hurt myself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/20 07:02 AM
27

YES! If I can’t have intellectually stimulating conversations with you for hours, I will have to cheat. Women have needs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/20 06:54 AM
6

Can we talk about how he immediately goes to “I hope your wife leaves you and takes your kids”??? This was my ex. “You deserve terrible things for expressing a viewpoint that contradicts mine.” They always tell on themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/20 06:52 AM
6

I am so sorry this happened to you. Please know that you are right- it was NOT your fault. There is nothing wrong with you. However you choose to find healing and love is the right way. I’m proud of you at 16 for calling him out! Fuck his friends and his mom. You’re a rockstar and he is a monster.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/20 06:47 AM
10

Yes. Mine did the same. And DEMANDED an answer. The worst part of this post is that this dude has nothing to complain about. But he does. Also 60-70 lbs overweight?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/20 05:11 AM
20

I am proud of you for leaving! He sounds awful. Congrats on getting rid of him, getting your dream job, and sharing love with a deserving animal instead of a shitty asshole.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/20 04:58 AM
30

This is hilarious. He deserved it. Talking about “what they’re used to” to imply their many past sexual partners but I bet if you mention one thing about an ex he would also cry.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/20 03:34 PM
12

Wow.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/12/20 04:33 PM
8

Omg. That would be so life-changing for women. I recommended this to every woman in my life. I never thought I was abused either but the way he described how the man calculated their actions just crushed me. I always let him blame alcohol. I always accepted his verbal apology. This book got me out of a bad relationship because when I suggested he actually apologize the way Lundy details, he called me a “crazy harpy” and said I was “manipulative and demanding.” For asking him to make amends, for …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/12/20 02:58 PM
21

Spit out my coffee laughing at this. Thank you. His idea of sex is of course two minutes of semi-erect jackhammering with no foreplay. Every girls wet dream.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/12/20 02:48 PM
24

I literally said it out loud! With gusto.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/12/20 02:40 PM
36

Wellllllll this hurt. Thank you for posting. So true.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/20 05:17 PM
10

It made me smile!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/12/20 04:43 AM
39

Ohhhh that quote is golden!!! Thank you for sharing!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/20 05:55 AM
10

I am so sorry. I hope you find your spark. I am working through the personal discovery deck by We’re Not Really Strangers and one of the questions is: What did the people who raised me teach me about love? What do I accept? And what do I reject? I am paraphrasing, badly, but these questions helped me appreciate my mom’s love while recognizing that some of it wasn’t healthy (my mom loved unconditionally and I emulated her by never letting bad men go. I am learning thanks to FDS.) I wonder if thes…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/20 05:10 AM
9

Crying. Honestly this is all I can think about now. That’s why the doll upset her. It’s impure.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/20 05:02 AM
7

Economy of force is genius!! You cleared up so much for me. Thank you for this!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/20 05:36 PM
42

My friend and her husband- HVW and HVM- go to therapy together, make decisions as a couple, communicate openly about their feelings, share in responsibilities, and love each other so much. He is a HVM all the time. He is thoughtful and kind. He and I had a disagreement about something at dinner one night when I was at their house and he was calm, respectful, and listened to me...but still disagreed. I was amazed and realized most men in my life get ugly when I disagree with them or vice versa. S…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/20 05:25 PM
14

The places where we feel most broken need to be heard, not fixed. Omg. Thank you for sharing this. Such an incredible insight!!! I will def read this!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/20 05:18 PM
31

He is testing your boundaries. No one should wake up to this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/20 05:15 PM
10

It’s amazing you have healed from so much and making this list is the first step in outing him for what he was! Anytime you miss him, come back to this list. You are so strong and deserve to be healthy and happy and far away from any man who would be more concerned about his social status than your health, hold your head down to finish, and write truly garbage song lyrics. He is a garbage man. You learned a good lesson about NVM and you are much better without that dead weight. Stay strong and l…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/20 05:13 PM
75

OMG came here to say this- thank you!!! Like. Why does she need him?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/20 08:36 PM
6

Yes!! Give him more love. And you know women don’t need to orgasm!!! Only MEN’S orgasm is necessary to create life. So stop worrying about that :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/20 07:34 PM
74

Cue the seven men who chime in that THEIR sexsomnia OFTEN involves fetching a butter knife from the drawer 🤢 🤢 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/20 07:23 PM
16

This is gold, thank you
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/20 12:10 AM
5

I totally understand and want to first remind you that you’re amazing in your own way, and nobody can love you or should love you as much as you can and should love yourself. That said, I think it’s helpful to remember that our thoughts are a product of habit just like our behaviors. When you have negative thoughts, correct yourself. Talk over yourself. Tell yourself positive and empowering things. Eventually it will be automatic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/20 10:10 PM
3

Number 9 though 😂😂😂 Perfect!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/20 10:06 PM
12

I don’t understand your question, either. Any woman following FDS would realize this man was married and run. The goal of FDS is to save us from dating LVM and NVM- and a cheater is always going to be a NVM. Nothing about the FDS says that the main goal is to have men pay for everything. It’s not. The goal is to weed out men who are going to take away from our already fabulous lives. Financial effort is just one of the many, many ways a man can show that he is worthy. The other woman in your sce…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/20 09:53 PM
17

I am so sorry to hear that he did this. Something similar happened to me, too. He blamed the alcohol and said he didn’t remember but that “he probably choked me because he thought I would like it rough.” We had been sleeping!! Then he also made it clear that if he had wanted to choke me out, he would have, so clearly he was innocent. This post made me so sad because it is definitely laying the groundwork for him to do whatever he wants at night. I hope she gets out, too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/20 04:05 PM
2

Totally got from Kate Manne and her amazing book Down Girl. She is amazing 💕
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/20 12:48 AM
1

There is a way to say this positively and without apologies! Or, even better, just do it. That’s what I do. I don’t say “I’m not going to give you my number unless we video chat first.” I just say, let’s schedule a video chat! If they don’t like it or ask for explanation I unmatch. This is my standard and way of dating and I don’t have to justify or explain it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/20 12:45 AM
1

Wait but what does he actually have to offer?! $200/month and he can suck nipples? This new woman will figure out soon enough that he is worthless.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/20 12:41 AM
72

This response is sickening. If he’s going to calmly acknowledge his behavior, he should give her what she is asking. And match her donation to women’s groups.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/20 06:37 PM
5

UGH PROUDLY!!!! So true. I hope you can love yourself and your body and let yourself go!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/20 02:48 PM
12

Do we think this is real though? Who uses “whilst” three times in a short paragraph? Also what girl would calmly say “facefucks” ?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 04:41 PM
72

Some of them are great! The one that says “his insecurities stem from not being able to provide you with 3somes” made my head explode. She literally said those behaviors were a result of being young and unhealthy. Nowhere did she say she ever wanted to do these things again. I hate himpathy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 04:35 PM
3

Thank you for posting the link!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 03:34 PM
3

This!!!!! I would spend 1,000 hours living my life and supporting queens but never would I spend five minutes to chase down a rude man’s hobbies just to insult them publicly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 03:30 PM
11

It’s definitely negative in the sense that a lot of your language is negative. A lot of don’t and won’t. You aren’t just telling them what you do want, you’re telling them what you don’t want, too. The fact that you even put a “sorry” in there makes it worse for me. One of my rules is I swipe left on any profile with negative language or apologies. I like people who focus on the positives. If I received a list like this from a potential, I would definitely unmatch. I would not send you hateful m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 03:22 PM
10

I love this! Thank you for laying it out like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 03:12 PM
11

I would love that. Thank you so much for sharing all this wonderful information!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 03:50 AM
3

Thank goodness for this sub and you ladies. It has opened my eyes so much!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 03:48 AM
6

Speaking for myself, it’s not a lie. I do want honesty. If a man is short, I don’t care. I have dated short guys and would again. If he lies about his height, I do care. I don’t date liars. I have gone out with guys who have their height listed as 5’3 and guys who look fat in photos, if they seem intelligent and kind and ambitious, which are things I value. Everyone has the right to make a decision for their own reasons. If a person misrepresents themselves, they risk the kind of immediate rejec…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 03:47 AM
120

I think the motorcycle thing is only the beginning. If he is already telling you what to do with your money and your hobbies, he will only get worse when kids enter the picture. You learned a valuable lesson. Get out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 03:32 AM
100

This made me laugh and cry. The double standard.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 02:06 AM
59

Your answer was incredible. I hope she got to read it before you were banned! Women have a right to know this and google is about as helpful as a male-run feminist subreddit. When I was first struggling with pelvic pain, most of the answers I found on google told me to get over it :) and one recommended a dilator. Works for some, only made it worse for me. So grateful for this woman-only space!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 02:02 AM
133

Omg at him not listening to what she wants. This is a divorceable offense. “I hate not getting you off but I refuse to try. The only option is for you to somehow manage to orgasm from my flaccid attempts at jackhammering.” Sis run.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 01:59 AM
24

This is the problem. They think we are shallow when we just want honesty. I’m so glad the barmen intervened and that he was kicked out! I applaud you for your honesty and compassion. His response just shows that he was ugly inside.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/20 04:42 PM
1

Do whatever brings you joy- you deserve it!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/20 04:40 PM
3

Woww. Great recommendation! I just added her and her podcast, and her posts are giving me life. Thank you for sharing!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/20 04:23 PM
64

Omg I had a date with a guy who had brain damage!!! He literally couldn’t find his car after. He told me that his parents did a lot but now he just wanted a nice woman to take care of him instead. Told me none of this prior to meeting. Super cute, but nursing is not my thing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/20 04:13 PM
17

Came here to say this. At the very least because if she was cooking him 4-5 meals a day she would be able to eat some of it. I sample heavily when I cook!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/20 04:10 PM
40

God yes! Any indication of entitlement or lack of awareness about their own privilege, too. A lack of gratitude. And any vilification of feminism. Should be obvious but sometimes it is subtle. My ex would complain that many feminists had told him they hated men which led him to believe the entire movement was anti-men. I told him to google the definition of feminism. I should have run.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/20 04:05 PM
55

LOL like...we know what makes a man tick?! LVM and NVM just want to do the bare minimum and be taken care of and when their dick is able to get hard they want to put it somewhere. Don’t need a book for that. HVM are driven and smart and loving just like HVW. So. Yuck. This would be a fun read for wine night with the girls.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/20 03:58 PM
75

Thank you for sharing this! It’s not surprising. I’m so (not) grateful that Keith chimed in with his absolutely useless opinion. I bet he believes that abusing women is bIoLoGy because men are violent and visual creatures.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/20 03:53 PM
4

This is such a beautiful story. It’s heartening to know they are out there. Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 09:16 PM
4

That is so awful and I am so sorry that happened to her. The judge I had was very kind, had seen all this shit before, and didn’t even ask to see proof. His behavior in court was appalling (he did nothing but call me names and tell the judge how no man would ever want me) and she granted it immediately.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 04:27 PM
10

I’m so sorry he treated you that way. But I’m so glad it’s over! You learned a lot, and hopefully now you will take the time to appreciate your own worth. I hope you’re planning something amazing for your birthday this year! I know it’s difficult with Covid. For my quarantine birthday (in March) I bought myself a beautiful steak and a bottle of wine for dinner and I baked my favorite cookies. The day of my birthday, I exercised and took a walk and made myself a picnic in the afternoon. Then I en…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 04:06 PM
21

Thank you for sharing this! The idea of a partner being loving and staying present after a disagreement is so logical and yet, when I read that, I realize how many LVM‘s I have let in my life. They would pout and slam things and leave if they didn’t get their way. Thank you for this reminder that being calm and diplomatic is an important quality in a partner.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 04:03 PM
9

Thank you for sharing!! I needed to read this today.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/20 04:37 AM
10

OMG you pointing this out is so eye-opening!! Ikd if I had boundaries. I was a total pickme...but I did stand up for myself and my opinions and beliefs. When I told him once that I believed in fate and signs from the universe, he rolled his eyes and said “Children are starving to death but you think something out there is playing songs on the radio for you?” At the time it crushed me. It made me feel selfish and hateful. I thought about it a lot and decided that it doesn’t fucking matter if I do…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/20 04:24 AM
2

Peace is priceless!!!! Here’s to you and your happy new apartment! And yes. Fuck them both!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/20 10:05 PM
16

Excellent points and thank you! I had not even noticed it was all about him. Why are they so selfish.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/20 10:04 PM
21

HOW did you know this guy was a Marine?! Seriously though he was. And bad news for sure.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/20 10:01 PM
25

Of COURSE he refused therapy! And of course he had great insurance!! And I admit I almost fell for his trap. This is why FDSers need each other.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/20 10:01 PM
11

I am on board. YMGTOW? Yes men go their own way? PGYOW- please go your own way? Or like. FAM fuck all men? I would totally post so they could fucking see how awful it is. “Men aren’t logical they can’t think beyond getting their dicks wet it’s not their fault it’s biology! They can only be trusted with simple jobs.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/20 09:30 PM
11

This is such good advice, thank you. OP, you need to focus all your energy on loving and healing yourself. Hate and anger will drain you. Therapy, read FDS recommended books, exercise, level up! Do nice things for yourself. Sleep and eat well. When you are finally at peace, I think you’ll find that the anger will be gone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/20 09:21 PM
151

This was a guy I dated last year, pre-FDS. He had some good qualities but way too many red flags. When my pickmesha self finally asked for more than just fuck buddies, he sent me this novel and disappeared. Today, fully one and a half years later, he reached out to ask how I’m doing. Y’all- he hopes I’m well!! My past self started thinking that maybe he has cHaNgEd but thank goodness my strong FDS bestie was there to support and remind me to block and delete! When I found this screenshot, it was…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/20 09:16 PM
19

I love this!!!! He came inside her and that is her fault!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 11:06 PM
19

My favorite part about that one was how he devalued her work out of one side of his mouth, while admitting he sold it out of the other...So, clearly had value. He was a monster and I hope she left him
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 11:04 PM
13

Thank you for this!! Spot on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/20 10:41 PM
10

Excellent response!! Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 11:15 PM
42

Also...and this always kills me...do they really think women demand lush heads of hair? I’ve dated plenty of confident, fit and handsome men who shave their heads. What’s unattractive is pathetically clinging to something you are losing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 10:24 PM
22

I’m willing to bet his friends do agree with him. Manipulative and misogynistic men tend to flock together. My ex would always tell me how his friends agreed with his point of view, as though that in any way made it unquestionably valid?! He was mad about my ex’s paintings. In my house. ALL his friends agreed that was TOO MUCH. Funny, because all of my well-adjusted and mature friends don’t see a problem with it. I never brought that up because it’s irrelevant. My house, my things. Her past is h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/20 01:54 AM
1

Meanwhile we are happy, healthy, and thriving!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 03:37 PM
12

33 :) and I discovered this sub while I was in a crappy relationship! Thank you, FDS, for saving me from the man who didn’t brush his teeth, blamed my past for his ED, told me that my vagina was looser than his exes because I have HaD mOrE sEx, drank too much, lied about his height, complained about his acne but refused to wash his face, overweight, cruel, abusive, rude, shitty, careless, incapable of communicating, lying, shitbag. Here’s to leveling up- I got a squat rack and some weights, star…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 03:34 PM
81

I also love how the men truly believe that being seen as a possible predator is objectively worse than living in fear of men. Like. The insanity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 03:28 PM
52

“Vagina has never been gazed upon” I am crying. Thank you for this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 03:20 PM
21

They always tell on themselves!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 03:17 PM
8

Omg this is so fucking true. You nailed it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/20 02:14 AM
4

I had a guy who would “clean for me” but then wanted to list clean sheets as something he did FOR ME. Like...why do you not just wash your sheets like an adult? One time we had a really bad fight, and afterwards, he told me that he got stuff to clean his bathroom. He lived in that house for two years with no Windex and no Clorox. And buying them was meant to be some sort of apology to me. I can’t believe I ever stayed there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 03:36 PM
5

Go drown I am SCREAMING this is my new response thank you
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 03:24 AM
2

I used to always tell them that they looked better without my glasses, too! My contribution to this thread is “You’re too pretty to be single. What’s wrong with you?” As though being single is a DISEASE and not a choice. Ick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 03:21 AM
5

I agree! I had to fight my socialization to just let it grow. Now I love it. I also love the looks of shock from men at my unshaven legs. It really does make them uncomfortable. That I am just living my natural life. 🙄 As an aside, did anyone actually look at that link?? What a fucking nightmare. Please tell me why the second post I read was some pick me looking for them to confirm that SHE isn’t the kind of woman they mock. UGH. Shave or don’t but please stop asking internet misogynists to vali…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 02:17 AM
5

Where did this list come from?! I want to see it and SHARE IT!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/20 01:15 AM
10

Omg this. I love how WE must be the ones confused about our factual, accurate height...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 03:53 AM
5

It’s the 😤for me. Is this him being winded after one of his MANY MANY two-minute sex sessions??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 03:43 AM
5

This comment is gold. Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/20 03:40 AM
3

I’m sorry for your ovulation pain!! That sounds awful. I just have regular cramps but I found there are other options for managing pain. I went to a physical therapist for pelvic pain. Yes, uncomfortable. But she taught me how to manage my cramps at home. And diet changes, my libido is drastically reduced when I cut back on fatty foods. Not sure if there is another way to reduce ovulation pain but google the shit out of it, try everything, and do not be afraid to keep going to different doctors …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 02:36 AM
61

I think it’s because they delete their profile and start over. I also hate it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/20 01:08 AM
4

I agree with the WHY? Like girl. What are you hoping to gain?? What is the purpose???
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 05:22 PM
47

I love these reminders. Thank you for posting. Whenever I feel like I should smile at a strange man or shave my legs or inject poison into my face, I remember that that’s what THIS man wants. This cheeto-dust encrusted, fat, broke, loser. It’s a gorgeous reminder that the messages ingrained in society that put me down are the same messages that told him he is entitled to his bullshit opinions, while bringing nothing to the table. It is the fuel I need to rise up. Ahhhhhhh to be relieved of his b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 05:18 PM
218

When will this “evolutionarily visual creatures” shit stop? I can appreciate attractive men and attractive women equally. I am not desperate to be inundated with those images. This lie that we are only valuable as long as we are attractive is insidious. We have to break this cycle. I have had to fight the guilt but now enjoy going to the store in my shitty sweatpants with my hair not brushed. It is not my job to be beautiful. I remind myself of that every day.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 05:14 PM
13

This one may be silly but it really touched me. My brother is notoriously cheap even though he makes good money. When his girlfriend (now wife) moved in and they were deciding how to split the bills, he insisted that both checks go into one account from which all bills were paid, and then both of them had the remainder split equally into separate accounts to soend at their discretion. Her check was less than one quarter of his. He said he wanted it split that way because he wanted her to have eq…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/20 03:44 AM
14

HAHAHA and 290 “last time I checked” means 350! Bet his bed is covered in old takeout containers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/20 02:06 PM
9

These guys are the ones preying on barely legal girls. Disgusting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/20 12:35 AM
1

Thank you for this!!!!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/20 05:20 PM
3

The commenter who said “men don’t mind when people make fun of their gender” must not know about the hoards of crying men on reddit....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/20 05:15 PM
16

Came here to say this!!! He admits he has put no effort into his relationships, never bothered to chase his own dreams, and is now regretful that his life did not turn out the way he wanted? I like how he makes sure to mention that he could’ve dated women prettier than his wife. That says a lot about him. I’m willing to bet that he was the one insisting on the “luxury lifestyle“ that he claims his family demands.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/20 04:22 PM
57

The guy who wrote this definitely tries to date women frequently but gets turned down. And pretends his hand is his choice. Ickkkkk
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/20 03:02 AM
11

This hit wayyyyyy to close to home. I have experienced all of them. The feminists hate men one just...so many times.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/10/20 01:06 AM
3

HA!!!! Can’t get hard enough to put it where I want it but you think you can stuff that sad little sock in my ass? No, sir. Mine was that he couldn’t get it up because I had my ex-boyfriend’s paintings on the wall. Nevermind that we had had sex in my room before. His ED was always my fault- not his weight or his alcoholism or his porn addiction. Nope. Me and my past.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/20 04:42 PM
5

OMG THIS. Like. The suspicion makes it seem so much worse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/20 04:19 PM
19

I’m not sure how sneaky he is capable of being...but you did right to keep it!! I am so sorry this happened to you. Stay strong and stay safe. Hopefully he will respect your NO.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/20 08:40 PM
5

He lost me at “Snopes, a leftwing rag” which he then used to support his claims. Snopes was started by a couple, one Canadian and the other non-affiliated. Why are so many LVM liars?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/20 03:08 PM
19

YES came here to say this!! Never had a serious relationship. Doesn’t brush his teeth. Car is full of fast food wrappers. Shower is moldy. Still talks about highschool athletic prowess.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/10/20 07:12 PM
7

Why the subtext of hate in this perfect relationship? They talk poorly about each other’s friends, they make fun of people when they go out, he “lets” her beat him. They illegally download movies?! Bitch those movies are like 2.99..... no mention of careers, growth, education, or doing anything fitness related. I guess his statement that Instagram is her hobby means that he expects her to work out two hours a day, wear a full face of make up, and thoroughly exfoliate her lips for those special m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/10/20 07:04 PM
55

Asking them if it is related to their ED- fucking hilarious. Thank you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/10/20 06:50 PM
1

Growth-minded. Kind. And active! I don’t care what kind of activity. Just don’t be a couch creature.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 05:45 PM
2

This was so spot on!! Thank you for sharing. Catchy and then also...damn. Sad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 01:20 AM
21

THIS!!!! She is SO CLOSE. I hope he keeps being an asshole :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 02:55 AM
2

It’s amazing when someone tells you so blatantly that they have no concept of healthy love. Cue the red flag parade. I bet he thinks all his behaviors are bAsEd In BiOlOgY....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 05:32 PM
3

I would be interested in knowing her actual replies, though. Because when she flashed on the phone screen did not match up with what she was saying. Either way, I love the energy of this video.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 05:23 PM
20

Thank you for these thoughtful responses. Agree on ALL COUNTS and am disgusted that these scrotes are trying to act like their lives are so much harder. We have all the same challenges AND might get murdered.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 04:37 PM
25

Came here to say this! Great message, but she takes away from it with her delivery.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/20 05:30 PM
68

iT’s RoMaNtIC
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 01:03 PM
25

THIS. And the comparison that being used for a meal is just as devaluing as being used for sex? Hey bud! I would gladly trade the onus of buying dinner for a universe in which women are not seen as literal objects for fucking. This is just gross. I have had many wonderful dates with someone with whom I had no chemistry. If someone is good company, you enjoy the experience regardless of whether you “get something” aka get laid. If you’re not sure if someone will be good company, vet better. His p…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 09:15 PM
1

I have sent this to so many friends. Thank you so much for sharing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 09:10 PM
2

CONGRATS ON THE NEW HOUSE!!! You will fill it with love and joy and your life there will be fabulous. Sharing an Olivia Gatwood poem that gives me feels and also makes me laugh, it’s about the time we waste on boys and how we could have spent it. I know this may not apply but I love her power and I hope you love it too: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=RJ8W522jPyk
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/20 09:03 PM
14

Thank you for posting this reminder!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/20 11:42 AM
1

Loved your responses!!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 11:46 PM
5

This made me laugh so hard. Thank you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 01:26 AM
44

Came here to see this! She turned a tragedy into a comedy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 01:04 PM
73

Does...does he know that women can have guns? And that some decent men exist outside of the police force? Unbelievable. Anyway I feel like any one of us could kick this guy’s ass, no weapons needed. This post has major 5’2 energy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 01:02 PM
26

This is such a great post! Thank you for sharing. This made me realize that, while I have massively leveled up, I still go to the same places I went when I was a LVW. All those great places you mentioned used to intimidate me, so I had convinced myself that I like hole in the wall bars, or shitty breakfast spots. So I was going to these places for the same reason that scrotes do! I didn’t think I was good enough. Your post helped me weed out this unconscious bias, and remind myself that I am goo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 01:00 PM
3

I am so sorry your mother put you through this. I am glad to hear you have chosen to protect yourself from her, and any further emotional damage. It is so hard to stop loving someone who is low in value, but always the right choice. No matter who they are. Keep growing and glowing 👑
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 12:53 PM
3

I am so sorry! But want to say that I am so proud of you for growing up to make different choices. My father is a LVM and I am proud to break that cycle. You are a queen, and if you decide to have children, you will treat them the right way! With love! And even if you don’t, you will support and love the people you choose to have in your life, the right way!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 12:52 PM
3

I’m sorry you’re upset. I understand what you mean by clicking. Unfortunately, having the same interests and similar opinions and the same field of work are not inherently high-value traits. It is possible to “click“ with someone who is a low – value person. This is why FDS exists. If all we had to do as women was decide whether or not we clicked with someone, there would be no strategy. We need the strategy exactly because it is possible to have chemistry with someone, or easy conversation with…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 12:49 PM
1

You got this, girl. Keep going, keep growing!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 01:45 AM
2

This upsets me so much. Why is it so hard to brush?! It feels amazing. I’m sure you never want to eat Doritos again 🤢👎
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 01:42 AM
3

This article made me so happy. Thank you for sharing!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 01:41 AM
15

Dodged a bullet! I love that asking for a proper date weeds out this type. Imagine how much he would have droned on about himself if you had gone to meet him? He seems like the type to correct someone else’s stories. “You say you work in biochemistry, do you mean pharmaceuticals?” 🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 01:28 AM
6

Gorgeous collage!!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 08:21 PM
2

Thank you for this post!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 05:33 PM
7

THIS!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 05:32 PM
17

Oh....my....you think you have seen the lowest but this. We must serve their every impulse. It is, after all, our sole purpose.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 04:42 PM
15

I LOVE THIS AND WILL ADOPT!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 04:39 PM
11

I’m sorry you feel duped and sad. I really am. But I love this post and the message you are sharing. It is so great that you know your strengths and recognize your value and that you know what you need to do. You got this queen!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/20 04:38 PM
1

This show had potential but after FDS it’s just...hard to watch.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 06:46 PM
1

I love this!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 06:11 PM
68

Beat his dick more than he brushed his teeth OMG I am deceased. So sorry we have ALL BEEN THERE but so glad we are leveling up!!! That shit is behind us 👸
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/20 05:58 PM
5

I loved and needed this and also strongly agree! Queen!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/20 07:16 PM
77

Imagine reading this and it was written by your mom?! Ouch. My mom would never.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 01:23 AM
26

He did you a favor. If he is LVM, better end it now than find out when you are more invested. Don’t bother trying to figure it out. Assume this is for the best, put your crown back on, and keep moving. “Clicking” is code for hormones sometimes. We vet for value because we value ourselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 01:22 AM
21

Thank you for posting!! Freedom is the best.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/20 01:20 AM
15

I am so sorry. I hope you can get a restraining order. You will survive this. You will thrive. You didn’t marry him! You will move on! And I think that court can help you! Just be honest about what he did and how it makes you feel. They see his type every day. I just got a restraining order granted against my ex and yes, the process was emotional but I kept reminding myself that he disrespected me! I was able to get ANGRY instead of feeling hurt when I remembered that I told him to leave me alon…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/20 06:14 PM
3

Dude is obviously exaggerating because he wants sympathy. What do we bet he screamed at her one morning for waking him up and now she wants to sleep elsewhere?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/20 04:50 PM
19

LOL “90% of women choose to be with men” AS IF any of us would choose scrotes over queens?!?!?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/20 04:40 PM
8

This made me laugh. Occasionally I also desired the entertainment of these convos. It just makes them more angry and confused when you block and delete.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/20 04:39 PM
5

I love her. Thank you for posting this article.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/20 01:59 AM
36

Excellent point! The ones who suggest coffee dates or walking are low effort. The ones who suggest drink dates actively want to impair your judgment. Yuck.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 12:22 PM
37

THIS!! I love when a man makes his whole OLD profile about what he is looking for. It tells you everything you need to know about him. Left swipe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/20 12:14 PM
12

I doubt it happened. After a piercing like that, the last thing you would want to do is have sex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 10:37 PM
11

All of these were amazing but I LOVE the friendzone one. So fucking true.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 10:30 PM
3

Holy shit this is fucking true. Damn.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 04:50 PM
8

The best part of this is that you are not yet married. You can vet and if needed, leave, without paperwork. Assess him as though he is someone you don’t know. Pay attention. See if he does any of the things from the handbook- putting you down, etc. Above all ask yourself- if you met him today, would you want to date him? If the answer is no, if he does not consistently add value to your life, break it off and run.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 04:42 PM
9

Thank you for sharing. I am dying. You can buy dick!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 04:29 PM
3

I LOVE THIS. Thank you for sharing!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 05:28 PM
17

Comfort you about your penis insecurity- no woman wants a monster cock. Stop crying. Listen to your bullshit ideas without arguing logically- most rapists are men and I have stats to prove it. Stay up late with you- I like my morning time! Watch terrible movies with you- I’d rather be reading Drive to your house- I like mine better Stop talking to my male friends- not everyone sees me as a walking vagina Clean your house- it is disgusting but you are free to live that way Repeat myself- should’v…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 05:19 PM
47

I wanted to comment and say he watches too much porn...but I don’t need a bunch of scrotes in my inbox arguing with me about what women want.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 11:16 AM
2

Female pelvic pain is super common. We are taught to suffer through it instead of getting help- esp because so many doctors discount and disregard our pain! You are worth patience and kindness and while I am sorry about your pain, I truly believe our conditions allow us to have better filters for men! I have to trust someone before I can sleep with them. This is a good thing. Stay strong, stay positive, and keep moving forward. (And I hated the dialators! Of course you should listen to your PT b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 03:18 PM
5

I’d just prefer to keep my number out of it, and his. Not a clown anymore, thanks to FDS!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 03:10 PM
7

I don’t want to be with a man who asks for my number, and I don’t want to ask for his. Our relationship can speak for itself. Red flags will be red flags...but some people do learn from their past. I would know!! I used to be a pickme 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 02:58 PM
6

These men are virgins
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 02:55 PM
8

I love this post!!! This is exactly the mindset we all need. And I am also laughing, imagining him at home, angrily clicking that button with a cheeto finger. Gross.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 02:53 PM
8

HAHA Your comment about not playing with childhood toys is GOLD. Go off queen. This man is pathetic and I love you for roasting him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 02:49 PM
7

Came here to say this- what woman do you know who says mensies?!?!?!? Or girlishness? Um naw. Nice try scrote.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 02:45 PM
15

He did you a favor! I hope you had a nice drink or meal to treat yourself. Do not be embarrassed. You are awesome!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 02:05 AM
6

You can do this!!! I am so proud of you for recognizing his BS, standing up for yourself, and finally putting the hammer down. Don’t waiver. You deserve to NOT have to pander to anyone in your own fucking home.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 02:04 AM
6

HAHA You nailed this and I love it
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 01:58 AM
3

I have painful sex and have found that high-value partners are over the top respectful, kind and communicative. I also “suffered through” sex with low-value partners who didn’t care about my pain. I also was not comfortable speaking up for myself, which made the problem worse. Physical therapy helped me deal with my pain but ALSO helped me learn to speak up!!! What I’m trying to say is, anyone who you want to be sleeping with will be understanding...because those are good people. You will just n…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 08:25 PM
19

I’m glad you realize. I hope you have a plan to get out. Please be strong.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 08:05 PM
229

Um...you have only been dating two weeks...but he had an annual vacation planned with no one else to watch his dog??? Huge red flag. He is taking advantage of you there. Also, anytime a man says you are too good for them, believe him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 06:31 PM
1

Thank you for sharing. Empowering to hear these reminders!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 05:07 PM
12

I love you for snooping!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 07:13 PM
2

Came here to say this- the immediate shutdown, the hateful comment after some time has passed, and then the final retribution. It’s always the same.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 04:55 PM
19

I am so glad you could get all that out of your head. You are right on all counts. Boundaries established and you are better off without him. Also, have been there with the toothbrushing....why are men 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 04:29 PM
6

SAME. I couldn’t stop wanting to scream at this man for DESPERATELY trying to justify his behavior.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 05:24 PM
1

Love the idea of a background check! How about a basic IQ test? You have to solve a series of basic math questions in a set amount of time, demonstrate an ability to use proper grammar, and a few multiple-choice questions showing that you are capable of thinking logically. Already drooling for an app that would offer this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 04:10 PM
18

HOLY SHIT My ex did this and I did not realize it was intentional!!! Thanks to FDS I know not to share my past anymore, but I am shocked that he was that calculating. What an ass.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 04:01 PM
6

He is 100% a player. Sleeping with multiple women but getting their promise of fidelity. Honestly disgusting. Great of him to show his ass up front though! Boy byeeeeee
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 12:59 AM
25

And you should never focus on one guy until you are committed. Keep dating! The guy who checks your boxes is out there. Don’t settle.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 12:56 AM
5

This comment made my blood boil. This same scrote would be on a reverse thread (woman makes sexist comments about men) telling the guy to dump her bc she is probably a lesbian.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 08:13 PM
16

This is frustrating as hell! Especially since they want us to do what works for their bodies. After reading Roar by Dr Stacy Sims, I now love to ask these know it all men what their ideas are for syncing workouts to my cycle and then watch them choke. If they aren’t terrified of even mentioning periods (most of them flee) and they try to bluster, I have the knowledge to call them out. All in a super friendly way, of course, since we’re all just helping each other right??? 😇
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 08:06 PM
22

What do you bet the man in question looks like a string bean with no chin? Toothpick arms? The kind of insecurity that would lead him to call women with makeup on “whores” tells me that he is a soft 2. Literally🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 11:45 PM
10

He sounds like a garbage man. He was in love with you after one month?? And then “fell out of love with you“ due to your display of behaviors it sounds like you warned him about? And ewwww he isn’t capable of ending a relationship after saying he no longer feels the same?! Girl. I’m not defending your behavior. I fully support you taking the time to level up, engage in hobbies that make you feel fulfilled and confident, read books that make you think, listen to podcast the challenge your worldvi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 11:40 PM
23

Came here to say this!!!! So gross how they talk about women - “if you don’t look like your photos you have to buy me drinks til you do”- and then have the audacity to post photos from TEN YEARS and a hundred pounds ago. Next.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 08:14 PM
26

Rewatching was painful!! They’re all terrible...Samantha is just a caricature of a man, Charlotte is pathetic, Miranda is a bitch and Carrie...God. When she goes to Paris with the Russian?! And then tells Big she got slapped but it’s not a big deal?! What?? I used to idolize those women. Thankful I grew up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 08:11 PM
26

The chewing sounds!! 🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 06:03 PM
9

Thank you for calling him out!! I do the same! I wish more men would call them out, too. Shame is a powerful tool.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 02:57 AM
18

The biggest question is what value does this compromise bring to your life? Sounds like...none. You said you don’t like sleeping over. That should be enough. It’s not a compromise when he gets what he wants while you are uncomfortable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 02:51 AM
3

This is awful. I am so sorry for your ears!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 07:35 PM
2

Scene on radio- season 3! It’s about the history of misogyny and it’s honestly devastating but empowering too. You have to understand what you’re up against to overcome it! ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 03:41 PM
26

This magazine cover had me rolling. Yes, I love when they hide behind the DA descriptor. As though it makes their inability to have a serious discussion any better? Instant turn off.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 05:24 PM
25

Don’t bother explaining. Block and delete. Being attractive does not make him a worthwhile person. Why would you continue to chat with anyone who makes you question yourself like this?! The only thing cringy is his behavior. Ick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 05:20 PM
2

Um yes. I bought three. Thank you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 01:57 AM
10

I have to say. If your relationship is a solid one, if she is a strong woman whose opinions and beliefs you value, she may be worth keeping as a friend. We as women are not defined by our low-value fathers, sons or brothers. That said, you would need to ask her to keep the relationship separate, and be clear that your relationship with her son is over. If she can’t respect the boundary, she is not a HVW and not worthy of a friendship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 04:24 PM
2

Also the sound of him loudly chewing while being a controlling asshole was just too much 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 07:09 PM
3

This video was hilarious. He is correct that there is no female dating strategy with regards to an unwashed man in a teddy bear sweatshirt. We would all swipe left 🥳
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 04:06 PM
1

Your title had me rolling
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 03:00 AM
6

Him getting mad that you made him a sandwich! Fuck that. You’re so much better off without him. I’m proud of you for making this list and leveling up!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 01:40 AM
3

Thank you for saying this! It is as much in the workplace as it is at home. It’s exhausting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 12:41 AM
2

THANK YOU FOR THIS. So much. Omg.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 03:12 PM
4

This post is gold!! Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 08:10 PM
2

🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢 🗑
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 08:03 PM
4

DYING bc you nailed them. My friend suggested that we all start bringing a tape measure on our dates. Keep them honest.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 07:58 PM
6

Thank you for sharing that fact with them anyway. Makes me happy to know you have planted the truth. They probably go cry in the shower after downvoting you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 07:55 PM
4

I love y’all so much. It helps to say this shit to someone who agrees it is not OK.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 05:40 PM
1

Yes!!!! These four books saved me after my last breakup. He was garbage and he ghosted me but I was devastated. I had planned my life with him lol. Highly recommend all of these: The four agreements by Don Miguel The subtle art of not giving a fuck by Mark Manson The healing by Saeeda Hafiz (more about yoga but also about self acceptance!!) Resilience by Eric Greitens
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 05:39 PM
1

I think exercise and self-care are great ways to beat this. Also reading books! Whether they are fiction or nonfiction, anything to fill your mind with bigger thoughts and ideas. And I also have to recommend a kick ass playlist. I made a break up playlist after my last relationship ended, but I like it so much I listen to it all the time! Some of my favorites: Taylor Swift-I forgot that you existed Kesha – woman Mabel – don’t call me up Zedd, Kehlani- good thing If you need some sad tunes, try: …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 01:00 PM
17

You are so right. And that response functions the same as the other, to show what an asshole you are. My other favorite comment is that women sometimes falsely accuse men of rape. Like, of course, a small percentage of people abuse the justice system in all areas. But even if you discount any rape that occurred without hard evidence (which I would never do, I believe and support survivors) there is still a massive amount of sexual violence perpetrated by men against women with witnesses, physica…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 12:52 PM
42

Came here to say this! They are so transparent.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 12:37 PM
116

Got my shameful hand up with you! Thank you for pointing this out. It is so much worse when they never deserved you. My ex couldn’t even be bothered to brush his teeth. When I mentioned once that his breath was awful, he attacked everything about me, before admitting that he had thrown up that morning and not brushed his teeth. Sir what?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 06:43 PM
4

I am so proud of you! Your journey has brought you to the right place. I’m so sorry that you were treated so poorly by him, but I am so happy you are getting therapy, realizing your worth, and moving on with your life. Things will get better! Keep moving!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 01:53 PM
11

Bad grammar supporting bad viewpoints. Love it when the trash takes itself out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 01:39 PM
6

This pic is so familiar. Haven’t we all seen this house? And run from it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 01:33 PM
48

This is true and PAINFUL
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 06:47 PM
4

I never heard back, either. Do I have enough of a history?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 12:23 PM
35

Any legitimate job will take out taxes on your behalf. If you’re not paying taxes, you’re doing something under the table, and getting paid in cash. Which means you’re also not able to invest that money, since it is “off the books.“ I’m guessing his retirement plan is to keep bragging on Facebook until he runs out of money, and then kill himself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 12:06 PM
63

Thank you!! I came here to say this. Also, we all agree this dude is single, right???
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 12:03 PM
3

Follow werenotreallystrangers and thecrimsonkiss , yumisakugawa and mothershipfest! For good stuff. And unfollow anyone else when that bullshit pops up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 12:52 PM
9

I could not even finish that garbage! Why does ANYONE accept it as fact that men “say what they mean“ and women are these painfully polite, socially concerned, delicate creatures who dance around the truth? Maybe 100 years ago, when women had to depend on the men in their lives for support, they self – censored to protect themselves. But to act like it is tge nature of a vagina-haver?!?!? I have known many women who are perfectly capable of being 100% honest. I have known many men who are confli…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 12:46 PM
8

“Participant with a moist cavity” LOFL I am crying. This comment is pure gold, though. You are absolutely right! If anything, women are the ones who should be concerned about physical compatibility. I’ve definitely had partners that were uncomfortable to say the least. Still, I have no interest in determining whether we are cOmPaTiBlE, until we’re exclusive!! If they say some thing about “wasting time“ then they are obviously from that terrifyingly low class of man that believes women hit a wall…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 12:35 PM
20

What a great article! I did not even realize the subtle ways in which the Times article put her down. Thank you so much for sharing!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 12:22 PM
11

I actually love this. So many strong women in our past fought hard for us to be able to get an education, work, vote....it’s an honor to carry their legacy. And to continue the good work!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 11:35 AM
21

Omg thank you for saying this. I was disgusted with his ignorance but you’re right. He is trying to take her down.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 05:19 PM
16

HA! My favorite part is her lying. The opening shot is a wallpaper. Pickmeishas really LIE about getting a man out of the gutter?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 09:50 PM
13

Has to be a troll. What man is capable of saying “who wants to go next” at the point of orgasm?? Maybe after. But I call BS. We all know they go glassy-eyed and incoherent in the moments before :) Only a man would be delusional enough to write this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/20 06:03 PM
10

Thank you for the follow up!! He is 🤢🤢🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/20 05:36 PM
25

OMG they say “loyal” but if you press them on it they mean blindly unquestioning, never looking at other men, no male friends...disgusting
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 04:10 PM
4

Came here to say this!! Thank you!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 04:02 PM
6

I second this. I read it and it was the intro to FDS principles for me- start by trusting your gut is SO IMPORTANT and yet something we are taught to ignore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 04:00 PM
4

THIS is perfection
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 02:38 PM
28

The comment from a “hot woman” who loves her “balding husband” Omg
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 01:13 AM
28

I totally agree that letting a man dictate your appearance is pickme! I have shaved and waxed for men but my preference is to have it full :) I will never again let a man make those shitty jungle comments to me. Fuck them. Hair grows.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 01:08 AM
21

Thank you for posting this. So true, and so needed to see this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 01:04 AM
4

First, I am so proud of you for starting therapy and for acknowledging your current situation!! Now I must say, working on your self esteem is so crucial. Once you truly love yourself you will realize that you owe men nothing. His initial reach out should have been ignored as he has already shown you who he is (an ass) and again, you owe him nothing!! I am still very impressed with you for questioning your own feelings and knowing that your worries are unfounded. We’re all conditioned to take sh…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 04:38 PM
182

Emotionally wounded community penis I AM DECEASED
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 04:34 PM
7

Ouch. I did. And he basically told me to be a pick me. He encouraged me to meet people soon after matching, to go on low pressure dates for drinks and coffee, and to not “waste time chatting.“ I think he meant well? But it did not go well for me. I discovered FDS in February. I was in the midst of a situationship that basically proved the methodology here, and why it works. I shared my past trauma with this guy, and he used it against me. Our first date was at my house, because I was a “cool gir…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 12:29 PM
1

“Spend all day foaming at the mouth about women who don’t want them” omg I laughed so hard! Thank you for this!! So refreshing to see an honest amd brutal take down of a creepy ass loser pedophile. I loved it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 12:21 PM
3

This is my favorite comment. Short and truthful. Thank you :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 11:50 PM
2

You will find the ability to trust and feel confident again!! You will find these in yourself and not from a man. I am sorry he hurt you. You deserve love and it starts from loving yourself. I am glad you have good friends to lean on and he does not deserve you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 11:25 PM
48

I love that he thinks a pretty, wise and virginal woman with a career that would allow her to raise a child actually needs him. He must not know about sperm banks.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 11:04 PM
7

All of these are gold!! Also, negative comments about dating or their exes, “joking” about my boundaries or about me being “too pretty to be single,” repeating themselves, inability to read my profile, any requests for photos. The photo thing burned me. I once had a man say “selfie or it didnt happen” and I sent him a photo (recovering pickme) to which he responded “bold of you to not wear makeup.” 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 01:13 PM
30

This is a mistake. He should be interested in dating people his own age, and so should you. An age gap like that creates a power dynamic that you can never overcome. And no, you do not want kids with a man in his 50s. Sperm ages too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 12:54 PM
5

I wish I could upvote this more. So true and beautiful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 01:00 PM
9

Thank you for this!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 12:48 PM
8

100% would take this list as woman-dominant, offer to cum on his face and peg his ass, and watch him piss himself in terror.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 01:45 AM
1

Why do they always go for the chin?!? 🤔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 06:47 PM
1

Never blame yourself for not knowing better! You can’t know what you need to know until you learn it. You’re doing great. Keep moving forward ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 01:46 PM
18

LMFAO AS IF any self-respecting woman would approach these string bean man babies...no sir. No shirt is needed. Also yes, my heart cries for the woman who thinks that her man will cheat unless she supplies a warning sign to other women.... honestly this logic is so backwards. You trust a warning on a T-shirt more than a man you are dating? 🗑
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 12:50 AM
15

I’m sorry for what you’re going through. It is better to stand up for what you believe in, than to stay silent. I’m sorry you don’t have a better relationship with your family. I’ve always felt that I value those people more who share my values, rather than those who just happen to share my bloodline. I know it hurts right now, but I hope that more good people come into your life, who share your views, will support and love you, and that you will have a much better life than the family who is wi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 12:47 AM
11

“If you’re available all day, stop dating and get some hobbies” 😂😂😂 So true. I loved all of this. Thank you!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 09:30 PM
27

This thread is so affirming!! I love knowing it’s not us, it’s them. I have to add mine. (1) Guy spends most of our date telling me the story of catching his ex-girlfriend in bed with her manager. I paid for his meal. He said with a smile that so many girls buy him dinner, and I told him that’s probably because we all feel sorry for him. I know I shouldn’t have, but I just wanted to get away. (2) Guy agrees to come to my house for a first date. I know this is a big no-no, but I had all his perso…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/20 04:51 PM
10

This killed me. I am so saving this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/20 09:28 PM
95

This response had me crying 😂😂😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/20 06:52 PM
2

I agree it is challenging. I used to blame myself for my trauma as well. Sounds like you have had lots of training on dealing with these issues, and just need to continue putting them in practice! You’ve got this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/20 04:58 PM
18

Oohh I want in! “Why would you keep stuff from past relationships? You must be obsessed with the past.” -Nope. Just enjoy the art on my walls. (Literal art. Oil paintings.) “I am a MAN and I need to be RESPECTED.” -Implying that women don’t? “I will NEVER be OK with you having one-on-ones with anyone you have slept with.” -This is how it starts. Soon I can’t have male friends. Then I can’t talk to men. Etc etc. No thank you. “I know you’ve had bigger dicks.” -Yes but honestly they kind of hurt. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/20 04:35 PM
8

No. Read the handbook! FDS is about doing the work yourself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/20 04:24 PM
9

I am sorry that you had a traumatic experience with your last therapist. I’m wondering if, in the last two years of personal growth, you have managed to take control over any other types of negative thoughts? The way people manage to control negative thoughts varies from person to person. It’s great that you recognize that you are responsible for your thoughts! The next step is figuring out how to control them. I understand that you feel like therapy is not the answer, but I am wondering if you …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/20 04:10 PM
7

This...needs to go on my wall. Hilarious.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/20 05:04 PM
45

Why did she have to clarify that it was “just a little bit!” gross?! No, no, no, and more no.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/20 07:48 PM
34

If you don’t feel comfortable having a conversation with him about where you stand, then he’s not the one for you. I’m sorry. I know it’s painful after so many wasted dates when you find someone that you think has potential...but being able to communicate with someone about where you stand is fundamental to any relationship. He’s said six months and he’s asking for more time? Run.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/20 03:24 AM
39

Square your shoulders, walk with purpose, and don’t be afraid to make eye contact. You can greet people with a firm good morning. If they try to take it further, just look away, Head held high, and keep walking. Carry something that makes you feel powerful, whether that’s mace, a knife, or if you’re appropriately licensed, a gun. Learn self-defense! There are videos you can watch online. There are only a few things you need to know to be prepared to inflict enough damage to get away. Read the bo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/20 03:12 AM
4

I do this too, and I loved your list. Get dirty with it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/20 11:39 PM
12

Thank you for sharing I love her
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/20 11:36 PM
44

🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢 As though they care
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/20 11:18 PM
6

I love this! Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/20 11:49 AM
3

This was AMAZING. I laughed so hard at “This isn’t feminism it’s just basic fucking etiquette.” And “I’m not your daddy, I can’t support you. I cannot work through all your childhood trauma for you.” HA! Who did this? Where can I find it??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/20 05:53 PM
3

Thank you!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 04:07 AM
3

THANK YOU FOR THIS! Gold
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 04:01 AM
29

You are doing great!! Keep up the good work, seek out strong female role models (even in film, music, Insta- everywhere!) and do things for YOU! Now that he is not calling you at 4am you can sleep, find your hobbies, work on leveling up. I know it will be hard but you are worth the work! You got this!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 03:54 AM
3

Where is the pre-date interview post? Can someone link? Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/20 06:58 PM
43

You should be proud of yourself for deciding that you would rather have a life that meets your standards! You are not settling for a single life. You are choosing to live your life the way that you want to. I think that too many women settle for the wrong man because they are desperate to fulfill the lifestyle dreams we got from watching Disney movies. None of those relationships end well. (Also, being older does not mean that a husband and kids are not in your future! And having children is not…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/20 05:00 PM
27

He said “Sometimes it doesn’t go as planned,” aka, I never thought I’d get caught. What a moron.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/20 03:58 PM
21

This article was amazing. Thank you for sharing. My favorite quote: “It’s just that the sex does approximately as much for us as making a cupping motion over our elbow over and over again. It doesn’t hurt, but why would we?” I literally laughed out loud. And then cringed. So true!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/20 01:10 AM
2

Mothershipfest for all female love! They post the best quotes. Analprobehearts is hilarious- she does embroidered red flags. Yumisakugawa...little strange but great questions! Werenotreallystrangers for all the feels. And I second thecrimsonkiss for dating advice!! Bodyposipanda shows her real body and posts about that. And jamessmithpt has great fitness advice- kind of random but he has empowered the shit out of me. I love this thread and all of you!!! FDS has made my life so much better. Thank…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/20 06:43 PM
3

I love this! My favorite dating experience was when a seemingly intelligent man ruined our date by telling me that he was a feminist. I asked him exactly what he meant by that? He replied that he didn’t actually know. At this point I had to bait him so...I said “well I am a feminist, and by that I mean that men should be removed from all positions of authority.” He replied that THAT wasn’t what he meant. I sweetly said that if he wasn’t sure what he meant, how did he know it wasn’t that? He neve…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/20 04:15 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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