The truth about "the wall"

relationship_reddit · 2022-03-07T18:21:38+00:00

It is 100% about their insecurity and desire to be worshipped.

The older you get, the more life you have experienced. You've lived on your own, had your own success, owned your own stuff. You're not impressed by the fact that he has the bare minimum requirements for adulthood (a car and a place to live), like you would have been in your teens and early 20s. You've had previous boyfriends, and he's not the only person you've slept with, so you know if he's bad at sex and doesn't put in effort. You expect him to actually do his share around the house, and aren't cool with serving him hot pockets while he games for countless hours on the weekend. You demand respect now, and aren't cool with him going to strip clubs or publicly thirsting after instagram models. You have been manipulated plenty by men by now, and don't fall as easily for their manipulation tactics.

It's not about your looks. I mean, think about it, 30 is supposed to be the wall, but most people don't look drastically different in one decade, and certainly not enough to deter male attention. If men were so great at telling age, I wouldn't regularly be assumed to be in my early 20s, when I am actually in my early 30s (as is the case for many women).

Put simply, when we are young and naive, our expectations are lower, and men love getting maximum respect for minimal effort. As we get older, we have higher standards, and men don't like having to actually to do the work to make us like and respect them.

ohmira · 2022-03-07T15:35:04+00:00

I do often think about how it takes a lot of women until their 30s to resolve the worst of the social brainwashing (keep investing in men/do everything for them and they’ll want you more), and right as we do - BOOM - no man wants you…

I still get hit on constantly, only in my 30s, it’s men with something to offer me as opposed to men only able to take. I don’t get cat called as much, or honks/engine revs, I don’t get bullied/devalued causally in my friend groups, I don’t have to sit through ppl talking at me.

Aging is a miracle and I’m thrilled that I get so much cooler as I go through life.

august-27 · 2022-03-07T16:40:47+00:00

I fully believe that “The wall” is a psyop meant to inflict stress and insecurity upon young women, creating fear of “time running out” and compelling us to settle for mediocre men. Overall this serves to increase male access to women while we’re young and easily manipulated.

I wish I spent less of my 20’s feeling stressed about my 30’s. What a waste of mental energy. My life is objectively better now, and I look the exact fucking same lol (but even if I looked older, who gives a shit… I’m human, we’re supposed to age)

Lucky_Sasha_12 · 2022-03-07T16:08:31+00:00

Why is that the age that women’s brain fully develops is also the age her ‘value’ starts ‘going down’ 🤔

unforgettablepurple · 2022-03-07T18:59:28+00:00

The idea that a woman is past her prime by 30 is ridiculous. It exists and is perpetuated to create a hostile divide and competition between younger and older women so we cannot gain wisdom and strength from each other. At 50, I’m secure and confident. That may be why I’m more attractive today than I was in my 20’s, 30’s or 40’s. I have my pick of men, and I’m consistently turning down men in their 20’s and 30’s.

Madholley · 2022-03-07T19:07:32+00:00

I think we are on the right track here. Right after I posted this, I got the message that a concerned redditor has reached out about me. I've had my messages off for a long time so this is their only way to get through. Thank you, scrote, for confirming how angry it makes you that women don't need you. Love the proof!

podPHD · 2022-03-07T16:34:30+00:00

The only wall is the one these morons have been banging their heads against trying to get our attention. Sorry Bob, but 'feelings' are not facts.

wonkyeyes8877 · 2022-03-07T18:30:18+00:00

In my 20's, I attracted more NVM like pervy scrotes and users who go after young girls for sex.

It really has gotten better.

BoxingChoirgal · 2022-03-07T16:45:08+00:00

Love This.

I(58) may have looked better in some ways in my 30's/40's, but I still attract attention/desire and I wouldn't trade my wrinkles and softer body for the personal fortitude and wisdom that comes with the privilege of aging.

And, as noted above, romance in the 30's made the 20's look like the shit-show it was. Sure, your early adult years are exciting and full of promise. But I looked better, made better money, and lived healthier in my late 20's/30's than any time prior to that. The 40's, sadly, brought divorce and financial struggles from which I'm not quite recovered. But there was ZERO decrease in my opportunities for sex. Physically, I looked and felt Great!

It's only that I became increasingly selective. Even after turning 50 , when I drew less interest, there was still Enough. And again -- I became increasingly risk-averse, less likely to compromise, and more willing to do without male companionship/sex than to put up with connections that would be a net loss in terms of my time/energy/emotional well-being.

Ours is a truly sick society that values a superficial set of beauty standards over the health, success, happiness and power of half its population.

So many men try to de-value those hard-won rewards of a woman staying alive, healthy and focused on living our best lives by sending the message that conventional youthful beauty is a woman's primary value. ...Followed closely by pleasing others/meeting the needs of men and children.

In my 12+ years of post-divorce single life, I have received plenty of feedback suggesting that I settle (which is not possible because I am not pond sediment) ,

Or that "beggars can't be choosers." That actually was said to me by a LVM (again , a foreign concept because even at my lowest -- and life has dealt some staggering blows -- begging was never an option). And yes, I walked away from that man. A man who wanted to marry me, at the ripe old age of 53 -- the ultimate prize for us old hags, right? Hah.

Honestly, the undertow of being de-valued based on age (By some people, and the job market, etc) did bring me down. Until I got up. Repeatedly. And have now reached a point where I have become too strong to have it happen, ever again.

I like to think of this decade as I transition into being one of the Elders, as the Fuck You Fifties. Notice how you care less & less what others think as you mature? And grow increasingly hard to fool or guilt-manipulate? It's the ultimate personal freedom.

And those who want to manipulate and control you (who most often are men) can't stand it. They go for younger women not just because they are conventionally "prettier," but because they are easier to fool and more prone to forgo their own needs for a man's.

The nest is empty, my life and heart are full. Life's Last Trimester is a promising chapter, if you have the requisite Courage/Determination and retain some level of Hope and Curiosity.

The only man welcome at this point is one who can add to what I have worked so hard to achieve. (And though it's been slow progress, the right one seems to have come along after all)

Edited to Say OMG Gold, Silver and Wholesome Award?! Thanks very much indeed. ❤️🙏🏼💃

jennybelly · 2022-03-07T15:57:29+00:00

Ladies just wait until you hit your 40s! So far, sooooooo good.

espressomeowtini · 2022-03-07T15:06:10+00:00

I’m in my late 20s and I used to have such existential dread over hitting “tHe wAlL” because of a scrote ZVM ex - but without fail.. Every. Single. Woman. I know that’s in her 30s or beyond now tells me how great life is going and how much less of a shit she gives than in her 20s.

HVW age like fine wine. Scrotes can die mad 🤣

JuniorProduct7060 · 2022-03-07T17:28:08+00:00

Honestly, it becomes clearer to me with each passing day that the more confident, knowledgable, and powerful a woman becomes (traits which do often increase with age), the more LVM will attempt to ridicule and diminish them. I'm only 19 (and immensely grateful to have found this sub so young!) and already I have experienced a shift in the way men approach me. I was catcalled and flirted with 10 times more in school uniform than I ever have been in my adult life. I firmly believe this is because schoolgirls are rarely seen as powerful. I cannot wait to learn, grow, and enter the later stages of my life when - I hope - even the lowest of LVM respond to my being with anger instead of lust.

Biracial_tooth_fairy · 2022-03-07T17:10:23+00:00

Yes, maybe the wall is actually the barrier that scrotes keep hitting while trying to get to us

VodkrSodr · 2022-03-07T17:44:11+00:00

5 years ago I was living in a shack with 4 roommates and shitty towels. Now im pricing out a 4 bedroom house in a high income area, to buy. Definitely do not want to trade places with 23 y/o me.

CountingDownTheDays5 · 2022-03-07T15:14:36+00:00

Kim is a very successful woman, she was a Harvard grad who created her own safe space called forharriet which is used for insightful discussion surrounding black women, media, and everything else. I enjoyed some of her takes on something other not so much, but one thing I will say is she is firm in her beliefs. Something that doesn't come easily to many. Check out her youtube and Parton she gives some good insight on womanhood.

Mysterious-Tea8763 · 2022-03-07T18:50:27+00:00

We need the young women to hear this! The only reason I looked forward to my 30s is because I ASKED other women about it. I got positive responses such as they felt like they grew into themselves, they were more confident etc. I'm 32 now and it's lovely! I could give a crap less what are men are doing and I get more respect. There's some major brainwashing going on for 20-something yo women and it's sad! We were trained to simp basically and I'm disgusted looking back. The way older men act around young women is appalling.

No-Village-3946 · 2022-03-07T16:01:08+00:00

Everything you need to know about how a man feels about women can be observed by his opinions on "older" women (women over 30 *rolls eyes*). You may not get fat, you may not get "ugly," you may not ever outdo him financially, so it's important to know how he'll feel when you get older, the only for-sure thing in this life besides taxes and death. Men are getting worried they can't neg "older" women into settling anymore and they're even more worried that women in their late teens & early 20s are taking notes from "older" women and wising up, resolving not to make the same mistakes. These men are projecting. They know nobody wants them now at whatever age they currently are and nobody will want them later either when they fail to live up to their delusions of grandeur and don't become the next Elon Musk or whatever.

myheartisfulloflove · 2022-03-07T17:52:14+00:00

I just celebrated my 31st birthday and everyone told me how gorgeous I looked, how I was glowing so much, that they refuse to believe my age. But I told them, thank you, but like…. 30s is still young! That’s what I don’t get! I can still run up and down the stairs, I can still dance my heart out, climb, jump around, laugh and scream with people I love, all the same like when I was a teenager.

Best thing to do is be gung ho about your health. In all ways. Physical health. Spiritual health. Financial health. Emotional and mental health. If these are all set to high, you’ll always look great no matter the age.

ThePatriarchyIsTrash · 2022-03-07T15:43:11+00:00

These are straight facts. My 30s have been my best decade. I love my body more (despite it being softer), I'm smarter, I'm happier, I got rid of dead-weight toxic men, I'm making a good living, I have my own home, I'm debt-free, my sex-life is more satisfying, and my bar is now so high that most men don't even get a second date

30s are where it's at. Don't let any scrote tell you otherwise

femgrat · 2022-03-07T15:43:19+00:00

I'm nearing 30 and most women I know over 30, married or single, childless or not, are all super confident and does not take B.S from anyone. And any man who has said women become undesirable after 30 have been men I would never desire at any stage lol.

apple_cores · 2022-03-07T22:50:39+00:00

Red pill and whereareallthegoodmen believe a woman after 25 is left over goods. 25 lol. And they shit on single mothers daily, while also finding fault with any woman 30+ who hasn’t had kids yet. They’ll fuck any of them tho and use them for everything.

My favorite is them being mad that a woman in her late 20s or 30s has raised her standards after toxic relationships - God forbid she realizes she is worth more. You can’t win and you can’t stop growing older so might as well live well.

AmeliaEmiliaEmma · 2022-03-07T17:41:16+00:00

Amen to that. I would never go back to my 20s, it was a horrible time. Physically- I look great! Financially- I have never been better! Mentally- so much calmer and wiser, depression is gone, and I don’t put up with anyone’s crap like 20 yo me used to do. Sorry to disappoint delusional men, but I still get hit on constantly.

jwithherspoons · 2022-03-07T17:12:30+00:00

I am so excited to be 30 next month. I look better than ever, am losing weight, have a great career with upcoming opportunities, have my own money, apartment and pets, honestly can’t complain. There’s more I wanna do of course but I love where I am!

teach4545 · 2022-03-07T17:54:35+00:00

I am 42. I wouldn't be younger for anything. I am finally confident and self-assured and that beats EVERYTHING else. Are you 30-somethong and feeling good about your self and your life? Just wait! It gets EVEN BETTER!!!

abstractsadgurl · 2022-03-07T18:21:52+00:00

I love this YouTuber she's so insightful!

jijitsu-princess · 2022-03-07T22:42:22+00:00

If you are the type of man who thinks that “the wall” is real and you hold all women up to that measuring stick I probably disassociated myself from them the moment they opened their mouths to say hi.

These types seethe immaturity, entitlement, and are quick to blame others for their own failings. I can smell these men a mile away and they certainly do smell like the dead fish that go with the flow who eventually settle to the bottom and become pond scum. They probably fuck like dead fish too.

deepdarkocean · 2022-03-08T01:05:37+00:00

i am currently 23 & gladly know it only gets better from here

lucky everyone that surrounds me believes your life actually starts at 30

Equal-Ear2312 · 2022-03-08T07:35:00+00:00

"no one wants you bitch"

because to them young = dumb = easily manipulated

asocialsocialite · 2022-03-08T05:12:13+00:00

The very same people who have come up with the idea of SMV are the very same men that are delusional about their own attractiveness towards women.

It's interesting how SMV matters against women, but apply it towards men and then get SO UPSET.

slayeroftruth · 2022-03-08T05:12:47+00:00

Don't you know its biological even though it never applies in any other situation other than them wanting to be pervert. How convenient they find what's biological gross in every other situation (healthiest body for women is having a little bit of fat on our body, demand women shave every inch of body from chin down, find women body after birth gross ect) and lie about it (men bodies are biologically supposed to be toned and muscular, their sperm in 30's passes on unhealthy stuff to children and women, teens are not fertile they have very high death rate compared to even middle aged women, women should be with male her age or younger in 30's for healthy children, women are supposed to mate with healthiest and strongest males ect).

Yeah, they are very insecure. It's so obvious when they go on about the wall. When you say biological facts, they get mad. Its best to dodge perverts which is another perk of getting older. Still get attention even without makeup just not from delusional nasty men who worship youth. Women don't like attention from nasty men we got in our 20's. I don't miss it at all.

foxorhedgehog · 2022-03-08T22:08:17+00:00

I’ve had more satisfying sex, both in quality and quantity, in my 50s than in any other decade. But please tell me again how I hit a wall at 30 and no longer be able to attract a man 😂 😂😂😂

janeaustenfan99 · 2022-03-08T20:06:29+00:00

Men just want you to feel insecure about your age because it suits their agenda

ilikedogsbutmenmore · 2022-03-08T11:15:33+00:00

As usual, it's another construct the patriarchy built to keep us down.

Teens = immature 20s = attractive but no brain 30s = unattractive but brain 40s = etc etc

All of this is bullshit they make up to subjugate is. We have access to a piece of our body which gives us more pleasure than any of them can offer and yet I'm supposed to care what they think

I think not.

Title	The truth about "the wall"
Author	Madholley
Upvotes	2241
Comments	85
Date	March 7, 2022 2:59 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/t8r1yi/the_truth_about_the_wall/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/the-truth-about-the-wall.1105233 https://theredarchive.com/post/1105233

Comments