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MidnightCarp Archive

View 8 posts and 130 comments by MidnightCarp on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
470

COCKHOLM SYNDROMEMidnightCarp/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/20 02:23 PM
430

DISCUSSIONMidnightCarp/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/20 05:21 PM
211

LIES MEN TELLMidnightCarp/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/20 10:23 PM
185

#JustLVMThingsMidnightCarp/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/20 06:08 PM
105

COUCH CREATURESMidnightCarp/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/20 05:48 PM
105

LIES MEN TELLMidnightCarp/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/20 02:48 PM
39

DUMP HIS ASSMidnightCarp/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/20 10:09 PM
1

DATING THEORYMidnightCarp/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/20 04:31 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
11

I hate this so much. Even with male friends, it's always some weird defense mechanism they resort to when you just try to give them some kindly worded feedback. You: So I get a bit frustrated when you talk over me, I'm sure you're not doing it on purpose but it does sound a bit disrespectful (etc., more walking on eggshells around his ego) Him: Sorry for taking a while to reply. I've been pretty depressed about my knee, it just hurts really bad when I try to run. I almost fell over yesterday bec…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/20 02:50 PM
18

The first comment, ewww. So women just aren't allowed to have boundaries and clearly express them without HaVinG a TaLk aBouT iT, even when it's about him fucking some other woman which is, idk, usually not something that warrants a longer conversation? Oh I'm not saying you have to do it, just don't shut it down without a fair discussion where he can plead and manipulate you into accepting it! Maybe you can meet him halfway, just have a threesome a few times instead of constantly like he wants?…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/20 01:38 PM
18

YES, especially if you're one of the women in the unfortunate position where their partner is treating them like crap but they feel like they can't leave because they love him (this is either biological pair bonding or trauma-bonding if he's abusive, both of these will be way worse if you also made the mistake to move in with him), so you just keep trying to make it work and change him. No, if leaving is very difficult, the third option is tricking your brain to erode the pair bond first. Don't …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/20 12:30 PM
37

Jesus, hope you can feel better soon, or at least not acutely hurting! And you already know you did NOT overreact. You're seriously kickass for dealing with this guy so efficiently, and for keeping your standards high after everything you had to deal with in the past. Also, keep in mind that he has ZERO power over you, even if you told him things you felt made you vulnerable. He can't harm you or violate you, he doesn't matter anymore. Take some time to recover with any calming and comforting ac…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/20 03:21 AM
62

Oh wow, seems like a really fun guy to spend time with. He even said it himself! Also, lmao how he says he's only looking for long-term relationships, when 1) everyone knows guys like this just put that in their profile instead of hookups/short-term to make us let our guard down, and 2) even two seconds in the company of this guy would be so insufferable that anything that counts as a "long-term relationship" would almost certainly give anyone brain damage.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/20 02:59 AM
6

Ah, I see what you mean but this is kind of a different axis - especially when you're young and less experienced, you can absolutely get infatuated with a guy who seems like he doesn't care enough about you. And then you keep wondering if this behaviour is because he doesn't feel that way about you, or because he "just" doesn't know how to show it. But you don't need to know which it is, because you shouldn't be dating such a guy either way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/20 12:41 AM
6

Many of them are definitely lying, and some don't have the actual concept of caring so they're confused and just say whatever. But if you think that there are HVM who are both caring and competent, it's logical that there will also be men who only have one of these traits, because they're at least somewhat uncorrelated. So you get some psychopaths who are very competent at reading emotions and knowing what other people expect of them, but have 0 motivation for it unless it benefits them. And on …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/20 12:25 AM
34

Sure, in most cases it's more about this! But there are also the guys who really put in a lot of effort, like go all out in reserving tables at a high-end restaurants (that he should know you don't like) and want to spend so much quality time with you without sex (with activities you previously said you're not so interested in), and they just keep failing. Like before I got harsh enough with vetting, I dated at least one guy who I'm sure really cared about me and was only dating for eventual mar…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/20 07:14 PM
33

Of course he didn't plan on things being that way! He just fucks countless women without a condom and pretends there magically are no consequences, doesn't learn anything from the SEVERAL times this surprisingly enough still leads to a goddamn child, and keeps picking up women at hotel lobbies. There are probably more children too if those are his habits, he just doesn't know because the women decided to drop him without telling him. Don't believe explanations, believe actions, such as him fucki…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/20 02:27 PM
10

First, perfectionism and thinking that failing at anything is catastrophic, and that everything can be quantified in terms of either failure or success. This applies to being loved; I used to think that by maximizing perfect cool girl wifey behaviour I would somehow win, i.e. my partner would love me the maximum amount, because of course he will love me more if I make an insane effort to be loveable - it's right there in the word "loveable", right? Lol, not so. He will get used to you and take y…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/20 12:29 AM
10

Ughh, yeah they'll just throw any explanation at you and see what sticks. So glad you left him!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/20 11:44 PM
21

Wow, of course that's why he watched porn, sounds like an absolutely logical and legit explanation
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/20 09:41 PM
68

Yeah, I always wonder about this too. Almost all the posts here are about avoiding cheaters, abusers, non-committal fence-sitters, garden variety assholes, and brain-damaged Chads. You'd think that being nice, intelligent, loyal, commitment-minded guys, they would cheer us on, because those traits are exactly what we're after. But somehow this doesn't seem to be the case? 🤔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/20 02:13 AM
12

TRP will rot his brain, literally there will be NOTHING left of the man you loved soon enough. It's over, but you can save yourself the pain of being manipulated and abused if you drop him before he learns more. He's interested in that stuff for a reason. That's either spinning plates while keeping you as a steady source of sex, or breaking your spirit until you're his submissive and docile housewife with no support system. Maybe both.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/20 09:42 PM
14

Love this comment lmao 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/20 09:30 PM
12

I just believe that if someone will cheat on you, they don’t need ideal circumstances. They will make their own. How does this differ through FDS? My view on this is that all humans have the capacity to make dumb decisions that aren't good for them in the long run, because even the most strong-willed people can be affected by situational psychological factors. We all sometimes do things we don't want to do, like eat too much junk food or procrastinate on work, and by the same principle sometimes…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/20 09:17 PM
19

Ohhh no, I glanced at her post history and I'm so insanely mad at this dude. :( u/justachoo you're worth so much more, you need to drop this guy and find someone who adores and cherishes you! Please don't ever stay with anyone who makes you feel like this, invalidates your feelings when you try to express them, and defends people who insult and mock you. This is the first year of your relationship, it's only going to get worse if you're already asking questions like this in the beginning.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/20 03:25 PM
292

If it's healthy to trust him when they sleep in the same room, isn't it even healthier if they sleep in the same bed, and maybe cuddle a bit? 🤔 It's not like anything would happen between them!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/20 02:46 PM
192

So healthy how my husband doesn't want to wear the universal public sign of commitment! I trust him 100%, so I don't care that all our friends who notice he doesn't wear his ring will wonder if he's committed, and always secretly feel sorry for me. And it's nice when he sleeps in the same room as his sidechick, I know there's nothing going on between them. :) (To be fair to the person who replied to her, their comment had more context and also stated it's not unhealthy if you don't want your par…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/20 02:32 PM
14

Yeah, there's no clearer dump his ass signal than him needing "space" to evaluate whether you're good enough for him. Even if he decides to not break up, if you stay with him, you will always know that's exactly where you stand in his eyes: just barely good enough to keep going, not someone he was actually so crazy about that he didn't need to question his feelings. Block him right away and find the person who sees your value with zero doubts and thinks you're irresistible. This is the most dign…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/20 11:04 PM
25

Ah, I think he's familiar with the Peterson family. I have a feeling this guy could've introduced you to a whole host of fascinating quirks and wacky beliefs... at a high cost to your sanity, unfortunately.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/20 06:50 PM
41

One of my exes was like this. It's baffling, I just slowly lost all my attraction to him, and this low-energy state after sex was one of the reasons. He sometimes just forgot about my orgasm. Sure, you can talk about it and tell him to first make you come, but then it always feels like my orgasm is just one thing he has to get out of the way before the ACTUAL sex he cares about can begin. Like all right, maybe it isn't his fault if he loses all energy and all desire to be with you after he nuts …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/20 03:54 PM
11

Learning to wrestle and grapple is the best chance women have in physical combat, though it's still unadvisable compared to deescalation or running away (but unless you've trained a lot, men will also run faster, so yeah, mace that fucker if you can). It's crucial to keep in mind the differences between us and men and to not get overconfident. Our upper body strength and punch power will always suck compared to men, and if it comes to a fistfight, we probably can't do much except shield our head…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/20 03:06 PM
9

Ugh, yes. I wonder if you could manufacture your own? It's just capsaicin so the sickest most insane specialist hot sauce should do, and there are spray cans you can pressurize yourself with a bike pump (the ones I found were pretty large, but maybe more digging could reveal pocket versions). Not sure if this would be illegal when it's essentially a food ingredient. It would improve my life so much if I had even a chance of defending myself in case some rando decides to start hassling me. I've h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/20 02:26 PM
12

Like the article suggests, undetected pregnancies that spontaneously end in miscarriages seem like the most common explanation. The group wasn't only women who had never been pregnant, it was women who had never had a son, either because of no pregnancies or because they only had daughters. So while trying for a child, these women might have unknowingly been pregnant with males for a short time (same for the women who never tried for a child, since birth control sometimes fails but you won't not…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/20 03:15 AM
93

Yeah uh, as someone who previously worked in genetics, such a test couldn't be designed to reveal anything except maybe about your very recent past. There's no DNA that magically gets stuck in the lining that constantly renews itself, that's not physiologically going to happen. I know the manosphere has this bizarre theory about microchimerism from getting dicked a decade ago. The scientific explanation behind this theory is scrotes mad (p < 0.00001). They mixed it up with how if you get pregnan…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/20 05:05 PM
1

Oh god, best case he's feeling neglected or insecure or something and isn't trying to consciously be manipulative, he just wants to boost his status in the eyes of someone he values but chose the most idiotic way to do so. Worst case he's been reading redpill material and is trying to dreadgame her, in which case there's soon going to be nothing to salvage. If it's the former, i.e. mild and not connected to other odd behaviour, she could maybe solve it by telling him once that she doesn't apprec…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/20 04:46 PM
11

Wait, why would it matter if he tries to call you tomorrow? You don't have to pick up, and can't you just block his number? Also, don't explain yourself to men when you break up. If you give them arguments to reply to, you get dragged into this tedious manipulative negotiation where they defend themselves or apologize or say you're mistaken about them because z, y, and z. It's harder to disengage when they try to make you feel like you owe them more answers, and they'll say anything to get you t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/20 01:38 PM
13

Not foolproof in any way, but men who prioritize looks often get uncomfortable if you make a joke about gaining weight (when he takes you to a delicious dinner, for instance). It's crucial to not say this in a self-deprecating or insecure way of course, you're not actually worried about it. But to the jackasses who want "a catch" to raise their own status, this is almost offensive - they feel you would be personally insulting them if you gained weight, so they react in a defensive or confused wa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/20 04:46 AM
106

I've been thinking about this a lot lately, and for me any acceptable variant of feminism must pass the "little sister test". Imagine you have a sister who is just starting her dating life. Would you want her to enter this directionless marketplace full of noncommittal, porn-addicted, dominant and aggressive creeps who want to play the field while hinting at a future together, using sex-positivity and choice as an excuse for their horrifying habits? Or would you want her to be assured that she w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/20 03:48 AM
23

Wow, yeah how is this even a question, it should be obvious that this is not acceptable behaviour. If you feel like you might be "overreacting" at this, you should read and really internalize the handbook and other sidebar material. Women are constantly pressured to not make a fuss even when it's warranted and not to have actual standards, so it can be hard to unlearn it all, but your BF is a crystal clear case of a complete LVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/20 12:00 AM
38

Ah, that's just an illustration, but similar things happen very frequently. Like this guy who took his gf out to a seafood place despite her seafood allergy. It's good to check to make sure your choice is ok, but the gist is normally people should be able to figure these things out even when their partner is sick and sleeping, or must focus on work without distractions before a deadline, or it's meant to be a surprise. It's more important in other contexts than just food. For instance, say you w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/20 06:11 PM
27

Yep. The best predictor of future behaviour is past behaviour.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/20 05:35 PM
62

Yes, please hurry up with this project. It honestly sounds like absolute heaven to never be bothered on the streets or harassed at the grocery store or followed around in the park because these men can all have an inanimate object to distract them instead. The only problem is that this could further normalize violence, if they aren't content without contact with real women in the end, but have gotten used to abusing their bots. Considering that with advanced bots they'll be constantly downloadin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/20 05:04 PM
24

Not all of them, but it's dire out there and we need to be ruthless in cutting off people who show any signs of dishonesty, pornsickness because vAriEtY, or other shady traits. Going by some statistics I found, in the previous year, 4% of married men, 16% of cohabiting men, and 37% of dating men had cheated. Because these studies are probably self-reported, and marriage is preceded by dating and often cohabiting and the whole relationship will obviously last several years/decades, my speculative…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/20 03:11 PM
18

I would recommend just the blocking. You have enough information about him and his approach to relationships, no need to let him waste more of your time. He'll just pretend to fit your standards when he realizes what they are, even if you do end up in a LTR he's not husband material since he's clearly had a lot of casual sex and this is his primary goal even now. "I've had long-term relationships even after sex on first date": he's already negotiating for what he wants since he realized what you…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/20 01:57 PM
25

Liberal and sex-positive feminism is about the right of an individual to choose what they want to do, regardless of the negative externalities this has on others and the society, or the long-term consequences of a momentary choice you make that seems fun but can ruin your life for a long time. I don't think this should be enough, we need better cultural standards. A society where casual sex is common that requires no effort from men apart from maybe being pleasurable in bed leads to a culture wh…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/20 01:33 PM
18

Yeah lol. I think this particular asshole is also trying to appease me since we used to hang out a decade ago before the discussions about active consent were mainstream, and I ghosted him after he started acting extremely pushy in ways that would be super unacceptable nowadays... and now he has a budding political career in progressive circles that would easily kick him out if they knew. I unfortunately don't have evidence about his behaviour, and am not looking to start anything now since that…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/20 03:56 AM
22

Same, this is just so so satisfying. One sent me a bunch of messages before Christmas, and when I never even read them he went through my FB wall liking random posts from years ago. Wahh wahhh pay attention to meeeee 🙄 I had previously just unfriended him on there but this earned him a block, lmao so desperate.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/20 02:29 AM
4

For some old school cabaret vibes, Emilie Autumn's Gentlemen Aren't Nice. Maybe not everyone's fave genre, but the lyrics and the way she delivers them are absolutely hilarious, and this song always reminds me of FDS. She's an incredibly kickass multi-instrumentalist musician in general.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/20 01:35 AM
22

Sure, it's called growing up. Most men never get around to doing it though lol. In this specific case, I wouldn't advise your friend to give him another chance, since the situation involved cheating. It's honestly not worth it to take a person back after they betray you, even if it was years ago. He will just do it again when he sees you ultimately took him back regardless. Even if you say you wouldn't forgive him a second time, it's simply not a credible threat anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/20 09:32 PM
3

Not sure there is a lot you can do, except keep focusing your attention on your friends instead of their partners when hanging out, and the other things you're already doing. Unfortunately the low number of men who have their shit together compared to women (and the tendency for so many otherwise seemingly good men to creep on their partners' friends, at least fantasize about them, etc. because of the male drive for variety) means that the "competition" feels real to the women for whom a relatio…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/20 09:11 PM
76

Guess what asshat, even if you never punched your partner ever in your life, if you punch walls during arguments you are an abuser. This is purely a psychological abuse tactic that makes your partner feel threatened, stressed, and afraid in her daily life, walking on eggshells because she sees what you could do to her if she accidentally angered you enough. She has no reason to feel safe around you and your temper tantrums regardless of your intentions, the correlation between punching objects a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/20 05:44 PM
30

Eww eww ewwww, I'm so sorry you had to listen to that shit and so glad you got out!! It's disgusting how abuse is normalized these days, though I guess it's best to find out sooner rather than later if a man is into hurting you so you can kick his pathetic ass to the curb. I can't wrap my head around how anyone can show such total indifference to whether his partner lives or dies as long as he gets to fulfill his gross fantasies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 08:56 PM
8

Tbh this sounds like depression, and maybe a dash of other mental health problems like anxiety! If you have trouble focusing, only get preoccupied with your life problems (rumination), and can't find the motivation to practice things you want to do, like writing, there might be something deeper holding you back that you need to address. I absolutely think you can become the kind of person you want to be. It takes a lot of baby steps and some time, but there's no reason to be fatalistic about you…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 07:10 PM
54

Iirc, statistically relationships where the woman is more intelligent tend to be significantly more stable! Probably because HVM respect smart women more and are impressed by them, so they will cherish the relationship more, plus I guess men are less likely to try to pull off stuff like cheating when they know she's going to outsmart him lol. Nothing wrong with having a relationship based on emotional support and a good personality as long as you don't feel like you're missing something, you can…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 01:54 AM
15

Yep. It's not only that the advice they give will harm your relationship by making you alone shoulder the burden of maintaining the relationship and your household, which is bound to cause resentment in you and loss of respect in him. It's also the way they recommend that you intentionally become reliant on him. Forget about your career and education, just optimize your entire skillset for catering to your husband and make yourself fully vulnerable to exploitation by a man who your own main sub …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 10:25 PM
17

I don't think there's anything you should do. You already told him about your expectations regarding engagement, so now you just need to stick to your boundaries if he fails to respect them and GTFO if you don't have a ring in six months. There's nothing further you could say to him that wouldn't make you feel like you're begging for him to propose. It might be tempting to start dropping hints and talking about friends getting married, but compare this to the situation where you don't take that …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 09:46 PM
7

I get that you're lonely, but that should never be a reason to lower your standards especially while you're so young. I think you know this guy isn't worth it - if he lives two hours away and doesn't have a car (and isn't willing to use public transport?) you're going to make all the effort if you start dating. And he hasn't suggested meeting up yet with something interesting planned, so probably he's just chatting to try to keep the hookup option open in case you ever happen to be in the same a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 09:35 PM
32

I remember the post on RPW around Christmas where the OP gave detailed advice on how to make your Captain happy during a stressful holiday time. It involved the basic RPW duties, stuff like cleaning and cooking, giving him all the space he needs, and not expecting him to take part in any of your family activities. The most heartbreaking part was her advice to not expect a thank you. Not for giving presents to him or other family members, not for cooking or cleaning, not for anything. Just quietl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 08:36 PM
22

Holy hell he got defensive in that thread lol. People are dunking on him for sounding a little bit narcissistic, and his response? Posting several comments detailing how he totally isn't and everyone else is just projecting, and doubling down on how a lot of women like him, really they do! For a non-narcissist, that seems like an awful lot of ego pain and a huge effort to look good to complete strangers online.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 07:43 PM
15

Nah lol. My face is honestly kinda plain especially without makeup, but so many guys in pretty much any social circle find me irresistible due to charisma drawing from good social skills, high empathy, body language, and wit. My partner is like in the 99th percentile in most HVM traits, but he's totally uninterested in how hot other women might be even they are obviously interested in him. He has always been puzzled if I have mentioned stuff like how bad my skin is, spontaneously compliments me …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/20 01:44 AM
20

Yeah, it's honestly just giving new attention to the same worthless thoughts they have been regurgitating for years, and the content is not relevant to us other than for a quick laugh or an eyeroll, so it's not worth it I think. We don't gain anything from debating them or rebutting their talking points, and it's very unlikely we would ever encounter them in any relevant social context. They're just living in a completely different world and we don't really need to be a part of that. Making post…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/20 03:42 AM
7

I mean, it's understandable he doesn't consider this a worthwhile accomplishment
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/20 09:14 PM
61

Oh god this is so funny lmao, he didn't deserve your sophisticated personality
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/20 02:18 PM
13

Just fuckboy I guess, we don't really aim to have many casual partners so we mostly don't need an analogous concept but those are the men who can't offer anything else
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/20 03:36 AM
14

Yeah, that does sound like a lot! :D I think most women have had that phase, or several haha, and the cultural atmosphere unfortunately seems to really encourage us to go overboard in ways that just won't be appealing to HVM in the long term and certainly won't serve our interests in building the life we want. But it's great to see how rapidly this community is growing, and really I hope you find a lot of interesting discussions here! Also, I'm just curious, but do HVW ever do anything nice for …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/20 02:40 AM
31

Sure, even if you have a bunch of pickme traits it's not like it's your whole personality (well, usually). HVM can be attracted to you regardless, and don't necessarily even lose respect if it's not too much. It's just, why would you bend over backwards to please someone if you don't need to? Women tend to invest more into relationships by default, so for your own sake - don't do it, you deserve better and can easily get it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/20 01:36 AM
76

Nah, just stop going to those subreddits and focus on improving your life. Keeping tabs on LVM on the internet doesn't provide any insight into our actual goals, and only works to lower our mood when we could direct that time and energy to activities that benefit us. They know about the long-term rates of depression and other massive problems among single men vs. women, and how men deeply need women to keep their life on track, but conversely can usually offer us absolutely nothing. So all this …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/20 01:14 AM
49

Yeah, I'm sure Anne with a net worth of $35 million living in Manhattan with a husband who adores her is miserable about her life because she has a few wrinkles at 37, and would switch places with this MGTOW poster in a heartbeat. How do these scrotes not see how much they're owning themselves? The only thing this proves is that even visible aging has no consequence to our well-being, love life, and happiness, considering how yet another woman who can easily afford to delay "the Wall" just shrug…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/20 09:31 PM
2

Ewww, thinking "I'm a lot crazier than you think" is a brag or an accomplishment, and that their anger and violence issues make them interesting. Or buying a gun, lol. Yeah, what are you going to do with you gun when the woman you'll do anything to get says she's leaving you? Assuming you know which way to even point it. Please don't give these edgelords any more attention, just block all of them. They think that posturing like this is attractive, and even when you just mock them, they find it r…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/20 05:27 PM
32

Disgusting how he just thinks this is normal. I never drink alcohol at parties if I have to interact with men, and I never give a chance to a guy who is or has been involved in casual sex culture. Even if he say's he's looking for a relationship now, any man who has actively looked for hookups has almost certainly violated someone's consent in the past with tactics like this. It's gross and baffling to me how they can so easily forget about the humanity and autonomy of a woman they want to hook …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/20 05:03 PM
13

Don't fall for it! I really get that the attention feels nice especially in your situation, and I think it's ok to internally bask in his compliments as long as it doesn't go overboard, but a professional environment should be kept professional. It's best to not engage with the flirting at all, because you don't know what the fallout will be to your career if he feels you led him on or whatever. Also, it's a good general principle, because men are increasingly breaking the very reasonable norm o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/20 12:59 AM
8

Yeaaaahhh!! 😂 That would be amazing, we can all relate to the disappointment
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/20 04:58 PM
16

Hahaha, dump hiiiiiiiiim!! 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/20 03:41 PM
5

Would it also be really inconvenient to him if he had to look for a new writer? If this is the case, you can use a bit of dread. Nothing unfriendly, but 1) explain to him that the interactions between you are currently not working and to get the professional results he wants he must communicate more, as when instructing any creative work, and 2) imply, but don't explicitly say, that you're honestly considering dropping this project because you have plenty of other clients too. This is a mildly r…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/20 03:22 AM
105

Ugh, that's ridiculous. I wonder why his previous marriage ended in a "bad divorce". 🙄 Also, just never ever date guys who play poker.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/20 01:53 AM
14

Never choose your career based on what men like! Build your life in such a way that even if all men were to disappear from the face of the Earth tomorrow, you would be successful and at peace with your career and who you are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/20 01:12 AM
111

And so many of the men who do want a relationship will backtrack like crazy if they realize they might have accidentally hit one of your dealbreakers or even something you might think was an incompatibility. I briefly dated a guy who at one point asked what my views were on interior decoration. I replied something vague about how I like my place to look nice, but I don't invest a lot of time in it. He though this meant I'm not like the other girls who would disapprove of his "minimalist" bachelo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/20 09:30 PM
33

Yes of course that was the right thing to do! Staying true to your standards will make you so much happier in the long term, and breaking up with him would've been inevitable sooner or later, which would hurt even worse after more investment. Don't let anyone waste your time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/20 05:57 PM
187

Haha, so glad about the update edit, and also that she stood her ground in the first place. Sleeping comfortably is worth more than any boyfriend. Plus his reaction to mentioning yeast infections, in the comments she also says he always happened to have work obligations when she was on her period 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/20 05:17 PM
11

Ughh that sounds gross, I'm so sorry you have to deal with all of this! But it's good you picked up the signs. He probably makes the jokes to assuage his guilt about secretly watching it, and to "subtly" try to probe how accepting you are of porn. I don't know why anyone who isn't deep into porn culture would talk like that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/20 05:07 PM
35

Oh wow, I bet if he talks and jokes about porn, he does watch it and is lying to you. If you're with a guy who doesn't watch porn, porn won't come up in your interactions at all unless there's a reason for it, because his brain isn't occupied with all that stuff by default, so random things he encounters don't trigger associations to porn tropes. For people who don't consume it, porn is like, idk, an aquarium hobby. You know some people are interested in it, you vaguely get what people mean with…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/20 04:48 PM
22

Sounds pretty likely, maybe not 100% certain. Could also be poor physical shape, hormonal problems, or other health stuff, but in young guys yeah it's usually porn. What's his stated opinion on porn, if you have talked about it, and does he claim he doesn't use it?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/20 04:02 PM
20

How can someone be so callous towards their life partner? This guy doesn't care for all the the health complications and shortened lifespan that could come with being overweight, or the way being controlled by an addiction affects her mental health and happiness. It's all about him. Also mad respect to this woman, kicking a binging habit is insanely difficult even on your own, but succeeding in face of all this? I'm in awe of her self-control.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/20 02:45 PM
73

Not a test, but #1 is to see how he reacts to fair feedback or comments on something personal he might feel self-conscious about. Some men can't help but get so defensive they're almost angry, even when they have to admit you're being fair, whereas some actively seek to understand your point of view and find solutions. If there's no reason for even mildly critical feedback in the early stages, see how he acts around his friends and family. His default behavious should show agency, thoughfulness,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/20 01:16 PM
59

They just can't accept that as a woman, even being alone as a single mother would easily be less stressful than dealing with a LVM. Also what's with the obvious self-own once again? "Women tell themselves that not all men will mistreat them, cheat, and lie, lol they should know there aren't many better men to go around" and somehow this means that women are evil, not that men on average are toxic trash?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/20 11:47 AM
33

Hey now, he's also "generally" a positive person! This glowing personality description should satisfy even the most demanding women, and more than make up for his quite reasonable requests.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/20 02:20 AM
18

Yea I know the feeling! In those cases most likely it's because this ex was his first relationship, or because of the honeymoon stage instead of a lasting intensity. Apart from that, sometimes people are just a bad match chemistry-wise, but it's nothing to worry about as long as you cut your losses in time and keep looking for someone who's crazy about you. :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/20 02:10 AM
52

Could simply be statistics, in that men on average have less emotional depth and intensity, so many and probably even the majority of them will come across as emotionally distant to many of us. You run into this type of men all the time, guys who sort of just go with the flow, they have a nice career and a nice social life and a nice relationship but none of that seems really emotionally important to them. They don't have a drive for intense affection and closeness or miss their partner when she…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/20 12:33 AM
44

It'S GraPE JuiCE aNd yoU nEeD tO SeE A PsyCh bEcaUsE You'RE CrAzY
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/20 12:55 PM
35

If women out-earn men and are smarter with money, men should realize they can't just rely on being the monetary providers anymore. There are so many other ways in which they could be great, high-value partners, like women have been when they historically earned less, but some men can't bring anything else to the table and are now despairing because their mediocre salary isn't enough to improve a woman's life. Like have you tried being empathetic and anticipating her needs, de-stressing her life,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/20 12:40 PM
61

Ewwwww gross, he sounds so childish and edgy, wonder how this is working for him lmao
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/20 11:57 AM
48

Ugh, that sounds so exhausting! But yeah there's a mechanism that explains this. Good men can attract a partner and maintain a relationship, so once they decide they want to meet someone, they spend less time on the dating market and are less likely to return. Through this selection effect, most guys at any given time who are actively looking for a partner are going to be trash - they're the ones that stay in the pool forever, or return over and over again. So on OLD it comes down to luck and pa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/20 01:20 AM
4

If I'm not mistaken, actual biologists/geneticists do not take it seriously as a field and get annoyed with how evo psychs misrepresent science. Haha, they certainly get annoyed! I majored in evolutionary biology and work in a genetics lab (switching careers to software though), so I have lots of first-hand experience about this. :D But usually it's not annoyance at the fundamental principles (the idea that evolutionary selection pressures must have shaped psychology, like they shaped other huma…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/20 09:55 PM
9

Yeah. Denying how human evolution has worked and insisting male behaviour is all because of cultural factors is a mistaken liberal fantasy. It may sound comforting that men have exploitative and aggressive tendencies because of some easily fixable errors in their upbringing, but you can't choose what you believe based on the consequences a belief would have - only based on the evidence you have for it. If men factually are wired, on average, to mistreat women as a result of a hostile evolutionar…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/20 05:19 PM
35

It's just personal preference. Short men can absolutely be HVM, that's way more about how caring and empathetic they are, whether they want to make your life better and support you, being smart and competent in their field and so on. Matters of taste don't really determine who is HVM, just who you personally will be attracted to. Some short guys can be kinda insecure about their height though and resent women for statistically having preferences they don't fit in, never date these men. For me he…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/20 04:55 PM
24

Hahaha savage, you should have asked him what makes him think anyone other than the escorts would like him Also "I'm open to something developing but sex is my focus now" what a tiresome cookie cutter fuckboy opening fdghsgdf
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/20 04:04 PM
75

Half of it is projecting, since a lot of male dating strategies such as TRP rely on deception. If you're a redpiller or a common fuckboy, you know you're going to make the life of anyone you date much worse, never give her what she needs, and just take whatever you get with no regard to what the outcome will be for her. Pretty much no one would want to date you if you were honest about what you expect to give and take. So you pretend to "maybe" be interested in commitment, future-fake, cheat and…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/20 03:19 PM
12

The first thing you do is differentiate between systematic tendencies and small blind spots. The latter can be fixed with communication, the former can't and you just need to dump them faster. Your first and second example: obviously systematic low effort and selfishness. What this means is that their respect for you, their empathy level, or their understanding of social situations is fundamentally lacking in ways that will show in all your interactions. You can spend ages trying to express your…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/20 10:44 PM
62

Lol, what did he expect to happen when he fails to follow through. Also no one is too busy for a whole week to plan a gallery visit in the first place, he was lying and waiting to see what his other options were for Saturday. Don't worry about it, this was not a man worth investing more time in.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/20 09:50 PM
35

It breaks my heart to see how normalized this material is. Everyone makes lighthearted memes about choking and slapping, young girls who start dating have to literally expect to get abused like that's a normal part of a loving relationship, men keep searching for increasingly extreme material after desensitizing themselves to every form of torture. People just shrug and justify this with the flimsiest excuses about sex positivity and kink acceptance. Reject anyone who supports this industry, no …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/20 09:38 PM
44

if I'm being realistic, I know that most guys I will meet with will very likely watch porn before we get commited to each other. Yeah, statistically it's hard to find men who don't watch porn, but if it's important to you, it's really not impossible even though men claim it is (e.g. my current partner did not watch it, since he always found it exploitative and he consistently has very high moral standards for himself, plus he and many other men find it fake and unattractive when they haven't con…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/20 08:53 PM
58

I also remember this exact post, so annoying how everyone was like "but don't you truuuuuust your husband??" No shit, a man develops feelings for an attractive woman that lives with him and has long deep talks about personal topics while taking care of his children. Even the best and most trustworthy men very likely would, they're the best and most trustworthy because they wouldn't want to put themselves in this situation in the first place.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/20 08:14 PM
14

Yeah, it's amazing that they want their life to be like this. They could spend their time cultivating virtues that make them good partners, men, and people, learning interesting skills that bring value to them and others... Instead they decide this is how they want their life to look like, a petty, passive-aggressive, neverending fight.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/20 03:40 AM
19

Hahah, this seems like such an empty existence. This type of guy has nothing else going on than how to get laid this evening and it's just so bizarre, I can't imagine living with no continuity, no personal growth, no exciting projects or relationships worth investing in.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/20 03:33 AM
21

Roughly, the behaviour that determines how the dynamics in the whole interaction play out. Like if you're crying and a man comforts you, asks you what's wrong and if a cup of tea would help, he has been pulled into your frame. If you're crying and he gives you no attention until you stop and go make him a sandwich, he managed to keep his frame, and you can't wait to sleep with him. So it's kind of a game of chicken where you try to "out-confidence" the other player, and wreck your ability to hav…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/20 03:21 AM
36

A few more: You get a constant feeling that you're being evaluated and that he expects you to impress him. Instead of talking about interesting subjects normally, laughing, being naturally expressive and getting somewhere in a conversation, it feels like he's mostly playing a game to keep you in his frame, and the content of the conversation doesn't matter. He's forgetful about things you previously talked about. He might tell you the same anecdotes many times, or not notice if you accidentally …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/20 01:52 AM
60

A lot of their "social skills" will seem a bit off, even though they may be superficially charismatic, e.g. through lifting and paying attention to their clothes and haircut. Getting a hang of external charismatic features is easy, but social behaviour is harder to learn and requires more intelligence, so that's where they're likely to lag behind. So they over-rely on rehearsed tics. They might use your name a lot (establishes an artificial sense of friendliness) or pretend to misremember it (to…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/20 01:05 AM
12

Well if you try to CONTROL AND OPPRESS him like that, he'll just do it anyway and lie about it because he's a normal man who just wants an innocent lapdance and a novel pair of boobs to grope, so why would you want to do that? Instead of just choosing to be happy with a man who visits sex workers and isn't forced to lie to you?? :) Also why aren't women more enthusiastic about dating men and trusting them with their lives, finances, and children, men are so starved of affection in today's cultur…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/20 12:53 AM
10

Sometimes it's worth it to stay with a partner who is depressed as long as he's seeking treatment - this ONLY applies to cases where he doesn't take his depression and anger out on you, though, which is exactly what your bf is doing. And he already said he's depressed because of you, so lol he can't accuse you of leaving him when he's depressed wahh wahh. By leaving, you're taking the correct action to make him feel better based on the information he gave you, and he should thank you. Byeeee
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/20 10:34 PM
16

Hahaha, yet another guy getting indignant about FDS even though TRP teaches actual abuse and manipulation, and he has 100% never spoken up about it or been disturbed by their content. And where has he seen a single FDS post about gay men, let alone so many that he feels slighted? Maybe he's visiting from a parallel universe?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/20 10:28 PM
46

I can't with all the cool girls and selfish guys minimizing strip clubs in the comments and accusing OP of being insecure and controlling. Not to mention the people who say he would just lie about it even if she did put her foot down - why would anyone be so nonchalant about lying to your partner's face about something like this? How do these people respect their partners if they expect men to just lie when you try to assert reasonable boundaries? If my partner ever even entertained the idea of …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/20 10:19 PM
25

It's not that unbelievable that less attractive men can find transactional relationships in countries with a generally lower standard of living, but I'm not sure he has really thought this through. He's bragging about having a model-tier partner, but selecting your partner primarily based on looks leads to way lower marital satisfaction in the long term, for both parties. If she's totally cool with him having sex with others, she's not committed to him either, just better at covering it up (thou…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/20 08:56 PM
42

First of all, think about whether you really want to be with a man who is turned on by hurting you, regardless of what turns you on. Being into causing you pain is not symmetrical with your kinks, even if it seems like it. It's never going to cause any harm to others if you're submissive, even if you went overboard in the heat of the moment... not so for dominant or sadistic men, who can seriously hurt their partners and should not be rewarded for their depravity. Regardless of my own kinks, the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/20 12:38 PM
8

I mean, this is an improvement to how RPs typically think. Usually they want to sleep around as much as they can while condemning women who do the same. So uh, yay?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/20 08:56 PM
40

I wouldn't worry too much even if the intentions are manipulative, this strategy has many obvious flaws the author seems to be completely oblivious to and the remaining advice is pretty trivial. Of course it helps to appear nonjudgmental and mature about sex if you want people to open up, and sure, people are sometimes more direct when tipsy, but the details here demonstrate no understanding of psychology. Not going to give further tips lol, but for instance, opening a discussion about previous …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/20 04:10 PM
24

It's called pair bonding and it distorts your thinking. You're used to him, and your brain has internalized that this guy is your partner... so you have an instinctive aversion to breaking up, you come up with false rationalizations for why you won't find anyone better, and you put up with things you would never accept in a partner if you had only just met him. Self-esteem issues only exacerbate this. I was in the same boat a few years ago. My long-term partner had been a boring slob for a while…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/20 02:28 PM
11

What in the world, yeah this guy is absolutely not what you're looking for. Just block & forget about him. I can't tell if he is just bullsh*tting me. This is obvious, yes, he is. If messaging is constantly slow on his end and he's indecisive about maybe meeting for drinks in the evening, he's just figuring out who his most convenient hookup option will be for the night. Even if he says he's busy or whatever. I'm worried that I'll come across as a bitch or that it's all just an overreaction and …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/20 01:42 AM
11

would there be harm in that? This wouldn't harm your image, and if you feel like you must do something then this is miles better than contacting him! However, staying focused on him will cause some internal harm to you. Pickme traits are not only about external behaviour, it's also a mindset thing. It's normal to take a while to get over a promising cute guy of course, so I wouldn't be too worried, but occupying yourself with other things that will benefit you in the long term will lead to much …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/20 08:24 PM
17

Nahhhh, not worth it. And you contacting him at this point certainly wouldn't help your image, so just keep up the good work building a wonderful life and meeting new people, and forget about him. Even if you aren't talking, he'll probably check your social media occasionally and see your progress, and if he grows up and wants a relationship and specifically misses you, he can make all of the effort. He doesn't sound that special though, he's obviously lying with the typical "sorry I had too muc…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/20 07:40 PM
30

Delicious! Especially when he knows just as well as we do that we absolutely don't have to do any of that and still have good chances to get an attractive and kind man, OR can just build a wonderful life where where we can be happy by ourselves, which is way better than this bizarre self-flagellating bangmaid arrangement he tries to sell us. Like... even if you had major difficulties finding a good partner and really wanted a family, it's never going to be worth it with the kind of low value cre…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/20 09:43 PM
47

Hahaha I love it, if the tickets were free I would totally attend just to see these weirdos on stage yelling bizarre rants about femininity and babies at an audience of three confused pickmes
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/20 06:02 PM
26

This is 100% the correct thing to do, it's not even about pettiness or revenge. This type of strategy, if more widely adopted by women, effectively disincentivizes cheating which is extremely harmful behaviour with way worse consequences than many obviously illegal things. Since cheating even in a marriage can't or won't be prohibited legally, the only way to reduce it is to find legal ways to make it too risky and costly to be worth it to these creeps. So, women who waste their time and especia…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/20 02:50 PM
51

he said "is that all you think I want you for?" This is a neg response, and an attempt to deflect the question instead of answering directly. If he had actual reasons to want to spend a weekend elsewhere, he would have responded with unique things he wants to do there, made it really clear he doesn't intend to suggest things he knows you're not comfortable with, etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/19 12:24 AM
12

Sure, if it comes up you should let them know they have competition, because this helps you avoid misunderstandings and more importantly because this makes them more aware they have to work to impress you. This leads to better dates and more respectful behaviour, setting up a good foundation to the rest of the relationship. You should not tell them any details though, just let them know you're also seeing other people and imply you will only commit to a consistently high-value partner. Even if t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/19 06:09 PM
1

Stay strong! I know it sucks a lot right now, but you'll feel so relieved once you get over him and really realize what a massive time-wasting bullet you just dodged. You're free to find someone much better this year instead of staying in a relationship with no future. You're actually much less lost in life than you were just a few days ago. Also, you're in no way obligated to have sex with him or even spend any time with him on NYE. In fact I recommend a clean break immediately, you don't need …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/19 05:40 PM
3

Do iiiiiit! That's the first step to a better life in which you don't need to waste more energy on this silly jerk. If not now, then when? Reading some of your other comments, it seems that your actual problem really is more related to boredom and low mood caused by unfulfilling life circumstances. That's what you need to focus on right now, 110%. Make a plan to fix your employment situation and move out on your own, even if it involves only baby steps at this point. It will take time, and that'…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/12/19 03:14 AM
3

Haha yeah, that's totally normal, I also felt that way about an ex who I resented like hell for how horribly he had treated me for years. Like all my accomplishments were just a bit more exciting if I knew he probably saw them and got envious lol. In the end, it's really inconsequential though. Now that a longer time has passed, I don't think about him at all, and just enjoy my success with people who are worth my time. Also the thing with blocking is, it stings him even more when he notices you…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/12/19 12:44 AM
7

I don’t know what to do. Block him immediately on every platform with no explanation and pick up a new hobby, meet new people, focus on building a support network and other structures in your life that will benefit you in the long term. This guy will never change, because his life has no other content than whining to girls about threesomes and playing people for sex. That's literally everything that goes on in his little head, he will never make the people around him happy or benefit society in …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/19 03:55 PM
17

Because they get self-conscious about their bad habits when someone asks them directly, and instead of fixing the actual problem and making choices they can own and be honest about, they decide the issue is the real or imagined social/reputational costs of their actions, not the actions themselves. And the social consequences can be fixed with lying. Tadah! Except that uncovering lies is easier than coming up with convincing and consistent ones in the long run, and getting caught is way more emb…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/19 01:34 PM
25

It's an attempt to twist reality so they don't have to acknowledge that men treat women astronomically worse than vice versa. Women very rarely engage in sexual or general violence towards men, and all the depraved things many men regularly wish they could do to women would never occur to us as something we want to do to them. So how can they make it seem like women are actually just as evil, and probably even worse, to justify their hate? Ah, just compare all that stuff to divorce (which, unlik…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/19 10:07 PM
5

Your therapist isn't competent. Even if he may have helped you before, he's clearly putting his allegiance to Team Man above his professional duty to make sure you as his patient will get better, which is his job. You also may have accidentally called out some of his bad behaviour when you described interactions with other men, and he relates to the people who have harmed you. The situation with your limited options sounds tricky, but try to at least look into female professionals, and also cons…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/19 09:32 PM
13

Sure, sometimes you can work to improve the dynamics of a relationship after it started off badly, but you're starting from a 10x worse position than with someone you just met. For him to be worth all that effort, he has to be a 10x better catch than the opportunity cost. If he follows insta girls and watches porn, and hasn't been considerate enough to e.g. independently figure out you shouldn't always have to be the one to travel to see him, that's very unlikely to be the case. If you still wan…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/19 09:13 PM
16

Haha, absolutely not if it involves the stereotypical heavy drinking and flirting with strippers or whatever at shady clubs. I wouldn't even date a guy who has close friends like that to be honest. You would never know if he only witnessed his friends doing dumb shit, or if he also got pulled into it as a result of group pressure and intoxication, since if his friends are the type to want "a last night of freedom before the ball and chain, FOR BOYS ONLY", they're also definitely the type to lie …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/19 05:09 PM
52

I feel so bad for her. Indecisive guys shouldn't receive thoughtful gestures as a reward for wasting your time. This gesture is particularly bad because men tend to read reversals in gender roles around gift giving and such as a permission to forget about romantic gestures altogether, since they "thought you weren't like a typical woman". This time of the year would be a good opportunity for him to reciprocate, but somehow I have a feeling that all she will get for Christmas is a halfhearted emo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/19 02:23 AM
5

Most likely a waste of time, yeah. Since you know you're only looking for a serious relationship, it doesn't matter if he seems different, he explicitly said he's not looking for anything serious. which is what they all say, right? No, the ones who want a stable relationship don't have any reason to say that. He didn't even say he "might be open for it if the right person comes along", right? Because even that would usually mark a noncommittal guy who just wants to string you along. Your guy cou…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/19 04:57 PM
5

You could use this as an opportunity to see if he is honest about the subject. If you ask in a neutral tone whether he uses porn (maybe not while you're at his apartment if the magazines are still there lol), and he says he's not interested in it or something equally absolute, you'll know he's lying. If called out he'll probably give some hasty cover story though for how the magazines ended up on his table by accident. If he says he sometimes does, or only milder stuff like magazines, you can as…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/19 12:32 AM
4

In addition to what everyone else is saying about untreated depression, even if he might be actually depressed, that's almost certainly an excuse. He didn't feel like replying and had to come up with a justification, and playing up how he's ~spiralling down~ does the trick for anyone who wants to convince herself he's actually worth it after all (which is his job, not yours). Why else would this spiralling that conveniently prevents him from replying have happened immediately after you met?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/19 09:41 PM
64

I don't think there's any benefit to replying, most guys who post stuff like this are trying to turn it into a negotiation and will feel like they scored some moral points when you acknowledge them at all, so they will find any response rewarding even if you block them right after.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/19 09:29 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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