Seeking advice: how can you test whether a guy is with you just for your looks?

fuckCharDMacDennis2 · 2020-02-15T03:43:00+00:00

You should be very mindful of what they say and do, but also what they don't say and do. When you have been dating a guy for a few weeks you can start to tell by what you guys talk about. When someone genuinely likes you they will remember things you've said and bring up things you care about. The conversation should be natural and enjoyable. When men only care about how you look they won't try to dig that deep and learn about you. let him lead the conversation sometimes and see how it goes.

Whateverrr_345 · 2020-02-15T03:35:19+00:00

They only want to sleep with you. 2. You're nothing more to them than narcissistic supply aka you provide them ego strokes by proxy. 3. He makes no attempts to get to know you, he only sees you as a physical object. 4. These types of guys will always move on to younger/attractive women. 5. He doesn't see you as a person- just an object. 6. These types of guys get bored easily and look for variety, they don't care about women.

LadyStain · 2020-02-15T07:02:07+00:00

Stop sleeping with them and see how long they'll put in the effort.

extraacct1234 · 2020-02-15T15:18:42+00:00

I asked one guy that I was in a relationship what he liked about me and he literally told me my looks and my sexual performance. I was shocked he just said that. He was such a narc he had no clue how that sounded.

Aeshaunua · 2020-02-15T04:10:35+00:00

You can't.

No man ever gave a woman the time of day if they didn't see physical attraction in her. Whether it's a pretty face or a hot body, men always come for something. Period. HVM or LVM they both want something nice looking or nice to look at.

HVM just stay to learn what's inside.

MidnightCarp · 2020-02-15T04:46:55+00:00

Not foolproof in any way, but men who prioritize looks often get uncomfortable if you make a joke about gaining weight (when he takes you to a delicious dinner, for instance). It's crucial to not say this in a self-deprecating or insecure way of course, you're not actually worried about it. But to the jackasses who want "a catch" to raise their own status, this is almost offensive - they feel you would be personally insulting them if you gained weight, so they react in a defensive or confused way, like very awkwardly laughing how nooooo they don't want that, or making a counter-joke about how they'll stop taking you on dinner dates then.

To someone who values the right things about you, it sounds like a harmless and endearing joke, and they'll respond in a natural, cheerful tone with something about how it wouldn't matter at all, or how he's glad you're enjoying the food. But words alone won't tell the full truth, you really need to watch the body language for signs of discomfort. He may be trying to give you the socially acceptable answer, but in his mind, for a brief panicked instance, he feels threatened and alarmed like a deer in headlights thinking how his hot gf could hypothetically gain 3lbs.

This might apply less nowadays, because beauty standards aren't as constrained by being thin as they were a decade ago. But you can make similar jokes or comments about anything you think your most conventionally attractive features are. If your best external feature to men is long, flowing hair, mutter something about getting a pixie cut when it gets tangled. If you're a curvy hourglass, say that you get why Billie Eilish chose her clothing style, and you're considering something similar. If you're a petite delicate feminine flower, say you want to get so buff this spring. He should support you, and at the very least not appear uncomfortable.

Title	Seeking advice: how can you test whether a guy is with you just for your looks?
Author	throwrared_
Upvotes	26
Comments	12
Date	February 15, 2020 3:29 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/f43sfw/seeking_advice_how_can_you_test_whether_a_guy_is/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/seeking-advice-how-can-you-test-whether-a-guy-is.682489 https://theredarchive.com/post/682489

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